Daily Reflections

If you would like to receive these daily reflections (written by various parishioners) in your email box each day, contact darcy.wharton@rocklincatholic.org

We are now selling a year's worth of our own parishioner's Daily Reflections in a wonderful book entitled, "The Chimes".  You can purchase a copy in the parish office for $5.  Makes a great gift!


































Reflections for Oct. 2-8, 2023

Oct. 2, 2023- Tear Down This Wall!
At some point it happens to most of us.  Life deals us a tough blow and we begin to develop a “wall” around us.  Two months ago, I facilitated a day retreat at our parish and the conversation turned to a discussion about this tendency to close ourselves off to others when we are suffering.  It is easy to develop a belief that we can take care of ourselves, and that we don’t need other people.  In essence, we build an emotional wall around us which we think is protecting ourselves from further pain, but in reality, closes us off from receiving exactly what we need- the loving support of our family, friends, and faith community.
I remember hearing former President Reagan speak the words, “Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall!” back in 1987.  The Berlin Wall came down two years later, and the line from his speech is etched in our collective memory.  Perhaps it can remind me that walls are often unnecessary and, in some cases, quite harmful.  
Open my heart, Lord, to be willing to bring down any wall that separates me from others.       Darcy Wharton

Oct. 3, 2023- One Precious Life

A while back I heard someone ask an interesting question.  “When was the last time you kissed your child goodnight, or read them a story, or pushed them on a swing?”  Of course, most of us don’t remember the date that we stopped doing these things for our children.  The questioner then stated that if we had known it was the last time, we likely would have savored the experience.

This also comes up when a loved one dies suddenly.  “If I had known it was the last time I was going to see him/her, then I would have ______(fill in the blank)”.  The poet Mary Oliver states in the last stanza of her poem “The Summer Day”, 

Tell me, what else should I have done? Doesn't everything die at last, and too soon?
Tell me, what is it you plan to do
with your one wild and precious life?

Every time I read this poem, I believe these lines could have been written by God.  It is a constant challenge and reminder to me that I have been gifted one precious life.  How can I act today in a way that honors this gift?
Darcy Wharton

Oct. 4, 2023- Hide Your Flaws?

When my daughters were young, I would tell them that they didn’t need to wear makeup, change their appearance, or wear certain clothes because they were already naturally beautiful.   As all good children do, they would immediately point out my hypocrisy.  Every day they would see me routinely curl my hair, put a bit of makeup on, and make sure that my outfit would at the very least look “flattering”.  

I’m happy to say that all three of my daughters took my words to heart.  I, on the other hand, am a work in process!  (A spiritual director once told me that it’s best to remember that we are always “in process” and not always progressing!) 

One of my favorite gospel stories is the Woman at the Well.  Jesus approaches her, knows everything about her (even things that others would find unacceptable) and then invites her to see her worth through his eyes.  She was able to let go of any concern about how others perceived her (or even how she perceived herself) and as a result, her life was forever changed. 

Lord, help me see myself as you see me and never let me be afraid to let others see me as I am!
Darcy Wharton

Oct. 5, 2023- Lead by Example

It’s no surprise to those who know me that one of my favorite people was Fred Rogers.  He warmed my heart as a child with his show Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood and as an adult, I am even more in awe of his accomplishments and his strong faith.  Many people don’t know that he was a Presbyterian minister.  His mission as an ordained minister, rather than serving as a church pastor, was to minister to children and their families through television.  Apparently he wasn’t too fond of television and felt that perhaps he could use it to nurture those who would watch and listen.
In my opinion, he did just that.  I remember the episode when he invited Officer Clemmons, a Black police officer on the show, to join him and cool his feet in a wading pool.  I did not know it at the time, but this was his response to the fact that Black citizens were still being denied access to swimming pools.  The year was 1969. This simple gesture (which included the two men sharing the same beach towel) was a powerful message to those watching. Fred Rogers knew the power of leading by example!

Words are not always necessary to evangelize.  While I should never be afraid to vocalize the good news of Jesus, sometimes a simple action is all that is needed.

Thank you, Mr. Rogers, for being a good and faithful servant.
Darcy Wharton

Oct. 6, 2023- A Father’s Love

A few months ago, our youngest daughter Emily got married.  In the initial planning, she wasn’t sure if she wanted to have all of the “traditional” aspects of a wedding reception.  However, with a little bit of encouragement from her mother, her D.J. and others, she decided that a father-daughter dance would be a nice thing to include.  Fast forward to the reception and the time of the dance.  It was quite emotional and my usually emotionally-contained husband fell apart.  A father’s love was present.

Two weeks later, that same daughter and her husband Andrew had a wedding reception in New York since Andrew’s parents live there.  Sadly, Andrew’s father is undergoing treatment for pancreatic cancer and he was unable to attend the West Coast celebration.  We were all moved when Andrew’s father gave a speech talking about his love for his son and how anticipating the wedding helped him find strength to undergo his treatments.  A father’s love was again present.

Both of these examples show the power of a parent’s love.  While I am aware that family relationships are sometimes complicated, when parental love is expressed within a family, it gives a glimpse into God’s unconditional love.  

Where there is Love, there is God.
Darcy Wharton

Oct. 7, 2023- A Taste of What’s to Come

It used to be quite a treat to be able to lick the beaters when my mother would bake a cake.  I’m not even sure I was thinking about the delicious cake that would be served later.  It was enough to relish the privilege to partake in this “taste”.  To this day, I always see if there is someone who might want to lick the beaters or scrape the bowl when I’m making a batch of cookies or a cake.  If no one is around, I’ll enjoy it myself!  

I was reflecting on how so many people enjoy doing this.  We all seem to like to get a taste of what is to come.  Even movie previews seem to take advantage of this strong desire within us.

What if I looked at receiving the Eucharist in the same way?  Each time I receive, I am essentially getting a taste of the heavenly banquet…a reminder of what is and what is to come.  Nothing could be sweeter than that!  
Taste and see the goodness of the Lord- Psalm 34:8  
                                                           
Darcy Wharton

Oct. 8, 2023- The Gift of Faith
I consider the gift of faith to be the most precious gift that was given to me by my parents.  I was one of those children who thoroughly enjoyed my CCD (now called Faith Formation) classes.  Since I enjoyed them, I never felt “forced” to attend.  I looked forward to going each week and later, even tried to start a bible study for high schoolers.  None of my peers were interested, however.  I learned at that point that although the opportunity to grow in faith is available to all, only some will accept the gift.

In today’s gospel, Jesus tells a parable of ungrateful wine stewards who refuse to share their good fortune with the landowner who employed them.  They went so far as to kill the servants sent by the landowner.  As a final step, the stewards were even willing to kill the owner’s son.  Jesus has some harsh words to say about those who do not accept his kingdom.  But the last line of this parable seems to say it all: the kingdom of God will be given to a people that will produce its fruit. 
 
The way I understand this, it means that the kingdom of God resides in those who accept the gift and who maintain a relationship with God.  I am not forced to accept this gift, but I cannot imagine my life without it.
Thank you to all the people in my life who have passed along the light of faith!                     Darcy Wharton  

Reflections for Sept. 25-Oct. 1, 2023

September 25, 2023 – Let the Tears Flow

In my life I have been encouraged to “let the tears flow” when overcome with emotion.  I remember the day when I saw my father cry for the first time at his grandmother’s funeral.  I was very young and did not know my great-grandmother well, but in that moment, I felt like I knew her through my dad’s tears because I could see the love they had shared.  My Grandma Marietta was notorious for letting the tears flow, and my mother finds it difficult to get through a family prayer or special liturgical gathering without shedding a tear…both women reflecting their love for others, and their love of God through their tears.  

Even with these incredible role models of emotional freedom, I acknowledge that it is difficult to show emotion, especially as I grow older and every cry leaves me a loud, blubbering and sniffling mess.  However, I also know that “freezing over” and hiding my emotion, only causes me further distress.  You see, even when the river freezes over, the current still runs underneath.  It finds a way out somewhere, whether downstream in cracks of ice, or in late winter as the ice melts.  Our emotions will find us eventually, so I may as well let them flow…because I might miss out on an opportunity for my tears to give witness and expression to the very love of God. 
Katie Maynard

September 26, 2023 – Sneak Peek

This year on two separate occasions in Monterey, and in Fort Bragg, our family went tide pooling.  From a distance, tide pools look like an assemblage of rocks and crags filled with residual ocean water.  But as you get closer you realize that what lies in those craters and crevices is a sneak peek of what is going on below the surface of the ocean: beautiful colors and magnificent creatures such as sea anemones, muscles, and starfish.   It was pure joy watching our kids bound between the tide pools, shouting enthusiastically when they would spot another amazing discovery! 

It's important to hold on to that joy because it is only a moment in time.  Eventually, the tide will come back and blanket it all.  Likewise, at any given moment our lives are like a sneak peek of God’s divine plan.  The person I am created to be and how I choose to live my life in relationship and with awe and wonder at creation, is just a glimpse of what God has in mind. 
Katie Maynard

September 27, 2023 – God Turn it Around
It has always been difficult to watch my daughters struggle in life, whether it is time spent in the NICU, navigating sensory processing struggles and speech disfluency, a Celiac diagnosis, or paralyzing anxiety.  And as my daughters have grown, the struggle seems to get trickier.  What feels delicate is the balance between supporting them, while also encouraging them to navigate the hard stuff in life.  We try to convey to our children that everyone is working through something big or small - it’s normal to struggle – and then we validate their feelings, and let them know they are not alone.

This past summer on Day 4 of Vacation Bible School, in the “Bible Adventure” room full of 5th and 6th graders, we had a holy moment.  As we spoke about the crucifixion, my hope was that they would hear a message of the Jesus who knows their pain and suffering, so that they never feel alone.  In the quiet darkness of the room, lit only by candles in the shape of a cross, they shared vulnerable stories of hurt feelings, cancer diagnoses, bullying, isolation in friendship, struggles of disability, pressure and anxiety, and tears were shed.  In this sacred space, we (myself included) received the grace of knowing what it means to carry the cross and to want to plead with God to “turn it around.”  By identifying with Jesus in this way, and holding that space for one another, it helps us surrender to the hard, and move to a path of healing.  We are never alone.
Katie Maynard

September 28, 2023 – Inquiry

When I first started teaching, I quickly moved away from the traditional “sage on stage” model of education and was drawn to the art of inquiry to encourage students to think for themselves.  This was hard for me though as a Type A, recovering perfectionist, because I was worried that I wouldn’t ask the “right” questions, or that the room would be filled with deafening silence. 

It is a skill that I am still learning, and  I absolutely can hear a pin drop on some days.  With time, however it has become an invaluable tool not only in my career but also in my relationships and in parenting.  I have become fascinated with asking questions which spark conversation, invite reflection and nurture connection, even if they are difficult questions to ask. 

Since being immersed in the world of RCIA, I have an even deeper appreciation for the process of inquiry and the power of starting with the questions; not to be afraid of the meandering and uncertain path that a good question can take, but to be curious about where it might take us and how we might learn from one another. 
Katie Maynard

September 29, 2023 – Dona Nobis Pacem

For many years now, my daughters have been blessed to be part of what is a growing choir of children’s voices singing the Lamb of God during the fraction rite in Mass.  Of course it is the sweetest thing to hear their voices singing, “Miserere Nobis…and…Dona Nobis Pacem,” however it has meant so much more than that.  In singing the Lamb of God week-to-week, they have taken ownership not only of the song, but also of the Eucharist. 

By ownership, I do not mean that they feel that only they must sing the song (they are happy to share it with any/all who want to join), rather they feel as though they belong to the song.  And in fact they do – they belong to the Lamb of God and to the Body of Christ.  Through that sense of belonging, they feel connected - and that is what the people of God are called to – to connect and become one with the Body of Christ so that we can be the Body of Christ broken and poured out for others. 
Katie Maynard

September 30, 2023 – Brother Sun, Sister Moon

Assisi is one of my most favorite places that I have ever visited.  I can still feel the cobblestone streets beneath my feet, taste the most authentic and delicious pizza, gaze upon the beauty of Tuscany, and of course find myself present in the Basilica of St. Francis.  I first travelled there by train from Rome where I was studying Early Church History.  I was overwhelmed by the ways in which I could feel the peace of Saint Francis in the ancient frescoes which told his story on the walls of the church, in the sanctuary, and especially in the peace garden adjacent to the basilica. 

St. Francis of Assisi knew the art of paying attention well, as he gave up everything to reverence and praise all of God’s creation.  As we approach the feast day of Saint Francis, may I remember the gift of this period of Ordinary Time in our liturgical year – the gift of time and space to pay attention.  There is so much going on in our fast-paced world, and God is present in all things waiting to be noticed. 
Katie Maynard

October 1, 2023 – Bend

At the end of summer, I was on a hike with my family on a trail near the Northern California coast.  I was awestruck by the trees, which had been bent sideways by the ocean winds.  In that moment, the song “Hosea (Come Back to Me)” came to mind,

“Come back to me with all your heart, don’t let fear keep us apart.  Trees do bend, though straight and tall; so must we to others’ call.  Long have I waited for your coming home to me and living deeply our new life.”

It’s impressive that a tall, straight and sturdy tree could be bent by the repetitious sea breeze…and it’s a good reminder that when life is frenetic and throws obstacles my way, I should be looking at how I can bend and move rather than spin or snap. 

Our gospel (Matthew 21:28-32) seems to be a lot about choices…our choice to see and hear, and struggle, and challenge and believe.  I feel a sadness when I think about those who were in Jesus’ midst and did not bend or move or change. Then I realize that the real challenge is to consider what I would have done in that moment.  It’s scary to bend and move because it’s uncomfortable and inevitably…. like the trees forever bent and changed by the ocean climate…we are never the same.
Katie Maynard

Reflections Sept. 18-24, 2023

September 18, 2023 – Boxes and Surprise
Recently David and I moved from our home in Auburn to Sacramento.  Our goal was to be closer to two of our daughters while staying close enough to Rocklin to be with our SSPP family. This was our second round of downsizing, the first having been when we moved from Southern California to Auburn.  Such a move requires lots of boxes; boxes for things to take with you and boxes for things to give away.  A month later as we moved into our new home and began the process of unpacking those boxes with the help of our children there were many surprises.  “Why did you save this thing?”  “Where is that (fill in the blank) that we always used?” “Oh look at this…I had forgotten about it.!”  It was surprising the things that I took and the things that I left behind.  I gave away most of the contents of our refrigerator but took a partially used purple onion in a Tupperware with me.  Why?

This experience raised the question for me of how am I like a moving box?  Lord, help me to identify the clutter that I am moving through life with that I no longer need.  What have I given away or lost that would be useful at this stage in life? What am I surprised at that resides within me? Why do I value certain things while easily casting away others.  And Lord, what did that purple onion represent to me?
Jane Haproff

September 19, 2023 – Diaconate
Today’s first reading from 1 Tim: 3 instructs the faithful on what the desirable qualities of a deacon should be: “dignified, not deceitful, not addicted to drink, not greedy…, holding fast to the mystery of the faith with a clear conscience. Moreover, they should be tested first.” As I read this I nodded by head, thinking they described David.  I recalled going through the process with him of applying for the diaconate, the interviews, psychological testing, regular check ins, the classes, the recommended spiritual exercises, and retreats.  Wives were included in most of it which meant we often left our six children with babysitters, and by year three, alone while we were going through formation.  I loved the classes and retreats and felt included in what he was doing.  At his ordination I smiled so much my cheeks ached.  It never occurred to me to resent that I had done everything he had done and was left in the pew when he approached the altar to be ordained by the bishop.  I did not feel left out or denied anything.  But…our children did.  Stories of their evenings alone have surfaced over time; stories about fighting to be in charge, slamming doors, hurt feelings, taking sides, tears.  And I wonder who paid the price for our “good standing” and desire to serve.   The Responsorial Psalm for the day was, “I will walk with blameless heart”.  Please, God, let that be so.
Jane Haproff

September 20, 2023- You are There
In The Secular Age Charles Taylor examines how we moved from a time when it was impossible not to believe in God to a time when it is difficult for many to believe.  He describes how God is no longer present in the everyday culture of the Western world.  For example, my first job was at a state college that closed at noon Good Friday.  That no longer happens. Stores used to close on Sundays; not anymore. Taylor claims that historically the increased focus on the dignity of the person moved us into a world of individual choice where religion is just one of many belief systems. Recently at daily Mass Fr. Bony made a point I have not yet encountered in Taylor’s book:  busyness.  The modern world increasingly puts strains on us and our time, distracting us from prayer and from actively welcoming Christ daily into our lives.

This struck me personally. Moving put demands on my time and energy that I had not expected.  I was exhausted. It wasn’t that I was too tired to pray;  I was in a state where it didn’t even occur to me to do so.  And most of the time, a la Taylor, there was nothing in the culture to remind me to actively bring God into all of this. I didn’t feel centered in God though when I had time to stop I knew He was there. 

Lord, help me to be aware always that no matter the circumstances of my life, you are there.
Jane Haproff

September 21, 2023 – Caught in the Middle
The home David and I recently purchased is in East Sacramento, bordered on one side by mansion-like homes and not far away, homeless encampments.  I find myself alternately drawn to the life that the mansions offer and repelled by it, especially considering the homeless camps.  How can I be so conflicted? I actively work for more just treatment of the poor because I believe that is where Jesus is. Yet not wanting to be too close to a homeless camp was one of the things I looked for in a neighborhood.  It seems I want to work for “them” but not live with them. There are reasonable excuses for why this is okay, but deep down I am shocked to discover that I am not Dorothy Day; I have limits on what I am willing to do.  Then I happened upon something Dietrich Bonhoeffer wrote from a concentration camp:   “There is no estrangement that cannot be overcome by intercession… {it} brings our brother into the presence of God to see him under the Cross of Jesus {where} his need…becomes so heavy and oppressive that we feel {it}  as our own and we can do nothing else but pray”.   As I lay in my comfortable bed at night, surrounded by an awareness of wealth, poverty, selfishness, ugliness but also beauty I feel that oppression, and I offer all that is good in my life up in the prayer that God will multiply it as He did the loaves and fishes so that there is enough for all.
Jane Haproff

September 22, 2023 – A Modern Parable
The house we bought is old and needed some work done on the foundation.  Knowing this, we purchased the house anyway and immediately contacted a structural engineer about fixing it.  As I sit here reflecting, two men are under the house making repairs.   I can hear their voices as they shout back and forth to each other. I also hear pounding sledgehammers that strike so hard the house shakes, while drills and large electric saws drown out the common noises of everyday life. These workers have been under the house for most of the day for nearly two weeks.

Jesus told parables about shepherds, farmers, vintners, the common workers of his time who spent their labor in the fresh air.  These construction workers as well as miners etc. go down into a dark world to labor in one way or another for a better life for those of us above.  They emerge at the end of the day, covered in sweat, dust and dirt.  I wonder how Jesus might use them to describe God’s love and care for us.   Hmmm… I leave it to you to make whatever connections you might see here. 

As for me, I am grateful that anyone would be willing to take on the dirt and the dark to make my world better.
Jane Haproff

September 23, 2023 – Presence
For most of my life I have not been attached to things, but as the last surviving member of my entire birth family that has changed. I am the keeper now of family memorabilia and I find I treasure things differently now. That coffee table art book my sister bought because she wanted to bring highbrow culture into the family means something to me with her death that it did not when she was alive.  I hold it and she is present to me in an inexplicable way. A small ceramic dish my parents bought on their honeymoon sits on our dresser.  I remember as a child my mother allowing me to go through the things she kept in that dish, and now I have my own things: safety pins, a single earring, a hair clip…but my mother’s spirit is there too.  And so it is with many things that I hang on to just because they make present a memory that I do not want to lose.  Sometimes nostalgia and a sense of loss can take over.  It is then that I am glad to be Catholic because I have material objects to help me remember who I am on a deeper level…crucifixes, rosaries, statues, medals all reminding me of a deeper presence, one that strengthens and blesses me.
Jane Haproff

September 24, 2023 - True Presence
Last weekend was Rosh Hashanah (Jewish New Year).  David and I were privileged to attend dinner Friday night with close friends.  Jewish holydays are celebrated at the family table since the temple was destroyed long ago. These household celebrations center around prayer and certain traditional foods that are important, such as apples and honey, kugel, and matzah, each with symbolic meaning recalling a blessing or a historic event. 

As I thought about this, I had a different understanding of what Jesus did at the Last Supper; a Passover meal celebrated in a room with his closest friends.  I wondered what Jesus was feeling that night, as he knew he would be arrested soon and probably put to death.  I imagine that he had that tight feeling in the back of the throat that I experience when facing something I dread, like saying goodbye to loved ones who live far away and who I won’t see again soon.  I want them to have something of me to carry with them, to remind them of me and that I love them.  And isn’t that just what Jesus wanted?  He took what was at hand, unleavened bread…and blessed it (with a lump in his throat I’m sure) and told his friends he would be present in the bread and to remember Him every time they did that. Then he laid down his life so that I could pick it up, consume it and know that he is really present and not just as a memory.
Jane Haproff

Reflections for Sept. 11-17, 2023

September 11, 2023—What Do We Want?

There are a few moments in my life that I can recall vividly.  While I was in elementary school, I still recall the moment I heard about President John F. Kennedy’s assassination on November 22, 1963.  Another is September 11, 2001 when I heard about the attacks on the World Trade Center in New York and saw those two tall buildings collapse.  I was in a state of shock for many days.

On September 11, 2001 all I wanted to do was go to Mass.  At the time, I worked a block from the Cathedral Basilica of St. Joseph in downtown San Jose and they had a daily noon Mass.  Several of my work colleagues came with me.

I think the first reaction for many of us was to retaliate, to seek revenge on those who committed these terrible deeds. But at Mass that day, the priest reminded us of the words of Pope Paul VI when he visited the United Nations in 1968.  He said, “If you want justice, work for peace.”  In a slightly different way at a Mass in New York during his visit, Pope Paul pleaded for an end to war by saying, “War…never again.”

Fifty-five years after Pope Paul’s visit and now 22 years after 9-1-1 in New York, wars have not ceased.  We are all weak and lack faith, driven by fear and violence.  But as a Christian, I also seek justice, peace and love.

Bob Leathers

September 12, 2023—Liturgy of the Hours (“LOTH”)

Recently, I was invited by the Archdiocese of San Francisco to teach new deacon candidates how the pray the LOTH.  I’ve taught this before—over six hours, but this time I was asked to do it in two hours!  Sometimes less is more!

The No. 1 official prayer of the Church is the Mass.  No. 2 is the LOTH, also called the Divine Office.  The LOTH has a long tradition, dating back to Judaic times.  With the rise of monasticism, for many centuries the LOTH was relegated to prayers said by clergy and monks at seven “hours” during the day and before bed.  The LOTH was updated following Vatican II and streamlined to include fewer hours plus a separate Office of Readings.  The Book of Psalms comprises most of the LOTH and 147 of the 150 psalms are prayed every four weeks.  Both 1-volume and more complete 4-volume LOTH books are available.  But most of us now use an app!

Why do I pray the LOTH?  For starters, I get an excellent dose of Scripture reading, plus I can do an “hour” in about 10-15 minutes!  Also, if I can’t get to daily Mass (usually the case for me), it’s the best substitute and by praying it, I join in the universal prayer of the Church.

Unfortunately, most laity do not pray the LOTH.  The good news is that a new revision is coming in the next 2-3 years, so I hope more of us will “discover” it.

Bob Leathers

September 13, 2023—Maui Fires

Nearly all of us have seen images and read reports of the recent devastating fires in western Maui.  Over 100 people have lost their lives, several hundred are still unaccounted for, hundreds of people have been displaced from their homes, and jobs have been lost.

I mentioned the fires briefly during a recent homily and noted how a friend opened up her Maui condo to 11 others in the aftermath of the fires. 

I also mentioned something that my spiritual director in Miami shared with me a number of years ago.  He wrote, “The wind is given meaning by the cross which transforms the wind to fan fires of love.”  How amazing it is that  the crosses of devastation and loss from the fires in Lahaina are giving way to new fires of love and support, not only by the example of my friend but by many, many others whose hearts have been moved to respond.

Bob Leathers

September 14, 2023—Exaltation of the Holy Cross

Today we observe the Exaltation of the Holy Cross, a major feast day that celebrates the saving power of the Cross.  Tradition has it that in the sixth century, Helen, mother of Emperor Constantine the Great, discovered the three crosses on which Christ and the two thieves had been crucified.  A bishop then identified the true Cross of Christ as the one whose touch immediately returned a dying woman to perfect health.  In some of the Byzantine Catholic churches, this feast is celebrated every day for an entire week.  The Cross is seen as a sign of triumph, of God’s enormous, incomprehensible love for us, of Jesus’ willingness to do anything for us and empty himself for us.

Our tradition tells us that we have been saved by the cross.  I sometimes wonder if my life shows this.  Am I better than the people in the wilderness who murmured against God when they found themselves in a difficult situation?  How faithful am I to God in tough times and do I turn to God for healing? Am I an avenue of healing for others?  There is no way to avoid suffering, sickness or death, but it’s quite easy to avoid the cross, to endure my own struggles and learn nothing from them.  Today this feast invites me to embrace my crosses because as a Christian I deeply believe they can transform my pain and give purpose and meaning to my life.

Bob Leathers

September 15, 2023-Community-Love & Support When You Need It!
Cindy and I moved into our home in West Roseville in February, 2021.  We are part of a new, active adult community of 500 homes. 

All of our neighbors moved in within a few months of us, and we couldn’t be more blessed.  When we are away, one or more of our neighbors offers to pick up our mail or take us to the airport—even at 4 am!  Another hosts a weekly coffee for all the men, and the women gather monthly for bunco while the guys have a night out.  We run errands and drop off soup or dinner when a neighbor is sick.

Recently, our next-door neighbor was home alone, recovering from recent surgery.  His wife, who was working in the Bay Area, became concerned about her husband’s condition, so she called Cindy and asked us to walk over and assess the situation.  He didn’t seem well, so his wife immediately called 911 and an ambulance took him to the hospital.  Cindy and I went to the hospital and stayed there until his wife could arrive.

Our neighbor had additional surgery a few days later and is doing better.  They were very grateful for our friendship and presence as we have been for them and other neighbors in our community.  And not only our neigborhood community but our SS Peter & Paul and other communities as well. 

I’m reminded once again that a joy shared is twice the joy and a sorrow shared is half the sorrow!

Bob Leathers

September 16, 2023—An Investment in Christ

Several months ago, Father Bony asked me to be responsible for coordinating wedding preparation for couples who wish to marry at our parish.  After discerning this for a bit, I enthusiastically agreed.

Our parish is blessed with talented couples who facilitate or lead many elements of the wedding prep process including engaged encounters and online preparation classes on Natural Family Planning, as well as FOCCUS, a 150+ questionnaire that helps couples identify and discuss elements that support marriage like shared values, communication, finances, and raising a family.  We also have a talented office administrator who keeps meticulous files and keeps everyone organized.

Part of the preparation process involves determining whether the bride and groom are free to marry and have no impediments to a valid Catholic marriage.  I am impressed that our Diocese and parish employs steps to help ensure that a marriage begins on a firm foundation.  Unlike flying to Vegas and getting married the same night, it takes about 6 months to prepare for a marriage in our Diocese.  Sadly, many couples give up on the church because of the time it takes, but I always respond that marriage is an investment.

In interviewing couples, I like to use my CPA skills to show couples that when they invest their money in the stock market or in buying a house, they do their homework so that their investment grows.  Their marriage is an even more important investment than the stock market or buying a home.  It’s an investment grounded in Christ!

Bob Leathers

September 17, 2023—“Remain in My Love”

I was honored recently to preside at the marriage of a young couple.  Many couples select the passage from John’s Gospel of the Wedding Feast at Cana, but this couple selected John 15: 9-12, in which Jesus tells his disciples to “remain in my love.” 

“Remain in my love.”  These four little words offer much to reflect on.  Another word for “remain” could be “stay” or “abide.”  So stated slightly differently, one could say, “stay close to me,” or “abide in my love.”

For marriages, there is some very good advice, not only for this couple but for my own marriage and any marriage:  Stay close to Jesus, especially in the difficult and challenging times.  I think Jesus’ words are a reminder that with God at our center, our marriages will always be one as God’s plan unfolds in our lives. 

Bob Leathers
Reflections for Sept. 4010, 2023
September 4, 2023- The Face of Jesus
Today’s reading harkens to the idea that Jesus cannot be accepted in his native place because, after all, he is the son of Joseph, a mere carpenter.  I often wonder if I would recognize the face of Jesus if he were here living amongst us today. Or would I doubt him, his ability, and his gifts?  When I think of my daily encounters with loved ones, how often do I not see Christ in them?  How often do I doubt their ability to be Christ-like to me? I liken it to how we cannot see the full picture when we are so close to the object(s) in view.  I once had a professor tell me that I was missing the forest for the trees.  I didn’t quite understand what he meant when saying this phrase.  As I have matured, I can better appreciate this saying.  I know that in being so close to the people around me, I can lose sight of Jesus being made present in them.  I pray that I can take the time to step outside of myself to see Jesus in those closest to me. 
Bianca Hennager

September 5, 2023 – We Are Not of the Night
Ever wonder what it is about the nighttime that has children afraid of the dark?  I struggled with being afraid of the dark as a child and swore there were monsters lurking everywhere around me.  I couldn’t see them clearly or touch them, but I was convinced they were there.  Darkness is the absence of light and it makes it hard to see clearly.  It is the lack of seeing clearly that had me most spooked.  At times I would pretend I was blind and would close my eyes.  I would walk blindly throughout the house with my eyes closed, so I wouldn’t “see” the monsters lurking around me.  Somehow, I had convinced myself that with my eyes closed it was better than with them open and not being able to see.  What a strange thought!  In both instances, I was prevented from seeing.  However, in one case I was trying to see and couldn’t; in the other instance I was purposefully trying to be blind- to not see because it was dark.  For me, it was easier to deal with darkness by purposefully being blind wandering the house than trying to open my eyes and fearing the darkness that surrounded me.  Today’s first reading tells us we are “children of the light” and we should not act as though we are in darkness.  We need to be light bearers for those who walk in darkness.  How can I be a bearer of light when faced with darkness? 
Bianca Hennager

September 6^, 2023– The Miracle Worker
In college I took a graduate level course on the Synoptic Gospels.  It was one of the best courses I took and it enhanced my spiritual life abundantly.  I remember discussing all the miracles that Jesus performed and questioned why – why did Jesus perform miracles?  Why didn’t the people understand he was the Messiah without him having to perform miracles?  My professor said something quite profound – Jesus would still be Jesus without the miracles.  The miracles are for us to believe, not for him to prove he is the Christ.  As I reflect on people in my life who have battled terminal illnesses and ultimately have passed away, I think about my prayers and whether I sought out “miracles” to be performed on their behalf.  I remember struggling with the loss of my best friend at the age of 38 and wondering how it could be.  Why couldn’t a “miracle” be performed on her behalf so she could see her young children grow up? I imagine if I were living during Jesus’ time and my best friend was faced with a terminal illness, I would be begging Jesus to perform a miracle on her behalf.  I would be clinging to anything possible that would help my friend live for another day.  I imagine Simon felt similarly when his mother-in- law was quite ill.  In the end, the miracle of recovery did not happen for my best friend but that doesn’t mean that a future miracle won’t be forthcoming.  We don’t always know the plans God has, including those for her children.  I pray that God continues to reveal himself to them each day.  Additionally, I pray that they have a piece of their mother with them throughout their life’s journey.
 Bianca Hennager

September 7, 2023– Our Obedience Brings Blessings
Today’s gospel speaks to how Simon begrudgingly was obedient and listened to Christ’s call to go back out onto the lake and put down his nets again.  He was rewarded with so many fish that his boat almost sank, and he had to get another boat to help him with all of the fish in their nets.  Simon wasn’t understanding why Jesus wanted him to go back out but was obedient.  Because of his obedience, Simon and the other Apostles were rewarded with a lot of fish – more than they had hoped for and more than they could handle.  This gives me hope as I struggle to understand God’s ways in a lot of areas in my life. I struggle to see the point of suffering but seek obedience in following His Way.  The other part of the Gospel message that is important to me is when Peter realizes Jesus was right about going back out – Peter says, “depart from me, Lord for I am a sinful man” (Lk 5:8).  How often do I ask for forgiveness when God still blesses me despite my struggle with obedience?  The last part that is truly telling is when Peter recognizes Jesus was right – Jesus says to not be afraid and gives him a new calling – “from now on you will be catching men” (Lk 5:10).  Thank you, Lord, for my continued blessings and calling me to new experiences to be your witness.
Bianca Hennager

September 8, 2023 – Happy Birthday
September 8^th is fondly remembered as Mary’s birthday but also is shared with the birth of my second son.  He had such a unique and special entry into this world and one that I feel was deeply connected to our Holy Mother.  I imagine as he was born, he was wrapped in Mary’s mantilla and handed to me.  I was not conscious at his birth, as I had to undergo an emergency C-section.  Much of his entry into this world is a blur.  I only remember a few key points due to the amount of chaos surrounding his entry.   Years have now passed, and today he is eighteen years old.  I look back at his transformation from baby, toddler, young boy, teenager, and now a young man and I am baffled at how quickly the time has gone by. 
I ponder Mary’s transformation from baby to young girl; then to young woman being asked to be the Mother of God.  By becoming the Mother of God, we see her sacrificial love for her only Son.  She continues to inspire me to be a better mother and to offer my love for my children as a sacrificial gift to God.  As Mother Mary modeled, I am called to be wholly obedient to the call of motherhood and to fulfill the vocation to which God calls me.
Bianca Hennager

September 9, 2023– Going Against the Grain
We are called to be peacemakers but sometimes it may be important to go against the popular vote or thought.  I love the saying “what is popular is not always right; and what is right is not always popular.” I grew up in a household that was not afraid of going against the grain.  We all have very strong personalities in my family and we only submitted to the one personality who was much bigger than our own – my father.  To describe my father would be difficult: intense and with strong convictions.  If his convictions differed from your own then you’d best have a dissertation ready to speak to how you arrived at a different terminal than where he landed.  For all our differences we have had over the years, I am most grateful that he instilled in me the belief that I could hold on dearly to my strong convictions.  At times this has posed a problem because having strong beliefs can make it difficult to see another’s viewpoint.  I try to keep this mind when I find myself leaning in towards my own comfortable bias.  I ask myself, “What do I hope to accomplish by going against the grain and speaking out?” 
In today’s Gospel, Jesus went against the Pharisees by picking grain and eating it on the Sabbath.  Working on the Sabbath was forbidden and was thought of as unlawful.  Jesus pointed out to the Pharisees the flaw(s) in their statements.  I doubt they took kindly to him pointing out the fact(s).  One of the main thoughts that I have come to embrace is honoring who I am while at the same time demonstrating charity to those who may think differently than me.  This is how I can “speak truth with love”.    
Bianca Hennager

September 10, 2023- Love Your Neighbor as Yourself
The greatest commandment is “You shall love your neighbor as yourself” (Rom 13:9).  This is such a simple statement and yet so hard to do.   I was asked to read a book entitled “Getting the Love You Want” which could help me better communicate with my spouse.  I scoffed at the idea of reading this book because I thought it was silly.  Why couldn’t he just love me in the ways that I needed?  Why was it so hard?   One of my “aha” moments in the course of being married for 20 years is that the way I love is not the way my spouse loves.  When I read the phrase “love your neighbor as yourself” I imagine what that love would look like, feel like, and be like.  My spouse has a completely different picture.  It took me a while to understand that loving my spouse means loving him in the ways he feels loved.  I learned that loving my spouse is about putting his needs before mine while communicating what is important to me as well.  For far too long I was silent in what I needed and thought he would just know.  Resentment crept in and burrowed deep between us.  It took a while to be able to unwrap what I had expected and what I needed.  I still tend to revert to old patterns of communication and habits; however, we have improved our communication and learned how to love each other differently.  We now know how we each would like to feel loved and how best to demonstrate that to one another in ways in which that love can be received.
Bianca Hennager

Reflections for Aug. 28-Sept. 3, 2023

August 28, 2023 - Coping with Difficulties

Reading through one of my prayer books the other day I came across this: “Dear Lord, Thank you for the difficulties in life.”  I immediately went to the book cover to see what mis-informed author had crafted it. Who the heck would be thanking God for pain and stress? Then I was reminded of a discussion in my bible study group. We questioned whether we tend to pray more when things are going badly or when they are going well. The popular answer seemed to be that we come to God more when we are in distress. It started to click with me, why this author would craft a prayer like this. It is often my difficulties that lead me to God. They remind me of my need for him in my life and this brings me closer to him. Then through him, I can see the benefits of these hardships. I often can see the lessons I’m learning and the resiliency I’m developing. So, Dear Lord, Thank you for the difficulties in life!
Jen Payan

August 29, 2023 - Fear Not

Scholars can’t agree on exactly how many times “be not afraid” occurs in the bible. It is often expressed in phrases such as “take courage”, “fear not” and “be strong”. The latest internet memes put the count at a convenient 365 – one for each day of the year. The way I see it, exact numbers aren’t important. It is the theme and message that comes through so strongly. In both the Old and New Testament, God does not want us to be afraid. He wants us bravely to go forth in life with confidence in our faith and eternal life. I try to remind myself of this when I’m afraid of trying something outside of my comfort zone. How will I grow or learn anything new if I’m afraid and never try? For example, in my many years of nursing, I have had to take on new roles and skills. Recently, I was trained to attend deliveries of newborns. I was terrified. I was slow with my charting and sometimes did things out of order. For being such an experienced nurse, I really felt like an idiot. But being at deliveries was the most amazing experience! It was the happiest side of nursing I had ever experienced, especially after working trauma for so many years. The reward of “taking courage” was apparent. Scripture is clear, God wants me not to be afraid, 365 days per year.
Jen Payan

August 30, 2023 - The Cost of Worry

We have no ability to change the past, and while we can prepare somewhat for the future, most of it will be out of our control. By ruminating constantly on the past and future, I am taking away from the present. I could be missing moments of joy or even rest. This is the high cost of worry.

The instructions are clear in scripture, Matthew 6:25-27:  Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?

The reality is that the birds aren’t thinking about the past or future, much like our pets who have total trust that we will take care of them. God desires this for me, he has assured me that I will be taken care of so I won’t miss being present and in the moment.
Jen Payan

August 31, 2023 - The Joy of Accomplishment

My adult daughter and I were cleaning out her room and boxing up memorabilia recently. She came across a letter she had written to herself as a freshman in high school. It was part of a class assignment where her teacher would mail it back to them after graduating high school. Now at 24 years old, she read me what her 15-year-old self had written about; it included what her life was like and all of her activities. It also outlined her dreams of college, starting a career and hopefully meeting someone special. As she read it to me, tears welled up in her eyes. She couldn’t believe that she had accomplished so many of the things that her teenage self-had been so unsure of. I also became very emotional, especially remembering how difficult some of the high school times had been for her and us as parents. It was a very special moment for me to get to see and recognize her accomplishments and marvel at the amazing adult she has become.  I thank God for the gift of this special motherhood experience and am reminded of His presence every moment.
Jen Payan

September 1, 2023 - The Art of Listening

Truly listening to others is rare these days. In our culture of social media, people only share their experiences and opinions without having to consider another’s input. In conversation, many find themselves busily trying to come up with common experiences and relatable stories as the other speaks, even interrupting at times.  I was reflecting on how often I may not fully listen and take in what another is telling me without bringing in my own stories or opinions. This is a behavior I would love to change. Imagine what I could learn and how helpful and kind it would be for the other person?

My prayer life could benefit from this as well. I know that God is the ideal listener and I tend to take advantage of that by constantly sharing my woes and asking for help. I rarely stop, quiet myself, and just listen. When I am able to do this, I can hear him and get clarity.

Dear Lord, help me to be the perfect listener, to all or those around me and especially to you.
Jen Payan

September 2, 2023 - Mistakes

What is the biggest mistake you have ever made? What are some of the mistakes you made today? Many of us spend a good deal of time ruminating on these questions and spend valuable time replaying actions and interactions we view as mistakes. Personally, I replay these in my head, wanting to change the past or becoming very fearful of repeating them in the future.

As a nurse, some of my mistakes have carried a heavy burden as well. Not making a mistake that could injure or even take someone’s life is a huge responsibility.  However, dwelling on this would render me unable to even go to work. So how am I able to move forward after making a mistake or simply being fearful of making a mistake? God and the help of the Holy Spirit have enabled me to deal with this anxiety. Firstly, trusting that I was given a gift to be a caregiver gives me confidence that God wouldn’t put me in a position or situation that I can’t handle. And secondly, viewing mistakes as learning experiences. I’d like to think that a present mistake is helping me avoid a future one that could have far worse outcomes.

Thank you, God, for the gifts that come with mistakes. Help me recognize them and move past them. You are making me into the person you designed me to be.
Jen Payan

September 3, 2023 - The Need to Please

Many of us spend so much of our lives seeking approval from others. I recently came across the term “the disease to please”, making it sound like something you get infected with! But truly, so many of our decisions can be based on what we want others to think of us, that it “infects” many areas of our lives and pulls us away from the important things.  I often catch myself thinking in these worldly terms. My weakness in this regard often comes in the form of not being able to say no and committing to things simply because I don’t want to let anyone down. I become tired and over extended. A good question for myself in these situations is: What does God want for me? What are my values and does this task fit with them? By putting God first and others’ approval aside it is much easier for me to say no and to focus on the right things for myself, my family and my relationships. This seems to be the best antidote for the “disease to please!”
Jen Payan

Reflections for August 21-27, 2023
August 21, 2022 – Nature Speaks
We joke in our house about those occasions when we lose a little bit of identity: occasions when I am referred to as Cathy’s husband (not Ray) or Cathy is Ray’s wife (not Cathy).  It often occurs in public and as an afterthought.  We laugh about these times.  It got me thinking about my integrity and my faith.  Can I ever really separate myself from what I create?  Can I separate myself from the unity created by my wife and I and our children?  Can I separate God from his creations?  When I see and experience one, I see and experience the other. 

English poet William Wordsworth wrote: “Nature never did betray the heart that loved her.”  When I heard this, it reminded me of the scripture passage: “For where your treasure lies, there will your heart be also. “– Matthew 6:21.   Jesus is reminding us that what we hold dear is where our heart, our attention, and our treasure is placed.  Wordsworth is reminding us that if we respect and value nature, she will never betray us.  But, have I betrayed her when I drive faster than is really necessary or safe?   Do I think about all the plastic packaging I consume when I could carry reusable bags for produce or visit the farmer’s market?  Do I volunteer or donate so that others may have a better insulated home or better food on their table?  If one of my treasures is nature, where my heart lies, then I must behave appropriately.
Ray Frink

August 22, 2023 - Common Good
My mom was a person of her time, born between 1910-1920, with 5 siblings, raised by a single mom when her father died from the flu.  Through much of her life, men dominated society and though she was equipped for other careers, she stayed home and raised her children, cared for her aging mother and older sister, and with my dad provided a safe and loving environment.  She also lived during a time when social, sexual, and demographic changes reshaped my hometown.  Some of those changes have proved over time to be ill conceived, while others have improved the lives of many.

My mom was a private person. Perhaps being a child of the Great Depression, her reserved nature was a defense.  I will never know.  Underlying all of how my mom lived was a desire for the good of others and the community.  What she and my dad lacked in treasure, they gave in time and talent to the Catholic grammar school I attended.  She was an election worker when needed. The Body of Christ was not limited to those who were like her. When my mom did not understand a person’s lifestyle, she could look past it to see the greater good.   My mom did not understand what we now call the LGBTQ community.  Still, my mom supported Harvey Milk, the first openly gay supervisor in my hometown.  She saw the good in the person and looked past what she did not understand.  She saw a greater good for the community.  
Ray Frink

August 23, 2023 - Live Like This
Michael J. Fox is a successful comedian, husband and father.  He also has advanced Parkinson’s disease.  This disorder has profoundly altered his career and will shorten his life.  A song lyric he strongly endorses is: “I don’t want to live like this, but I don’t want to die.” I thought about the varied and diverse traumas, little and big, I experience as I journey through life. 

I do not compare the changes of Parkinson’s to any changes I have experienced.  Unpredictable and uncontrollable change in life is universal.  I am not as fast, as strong, as agile as I once was.  I hope I am wiser, kinder, and more skilled in other aspects of life.  The world around me contains changes that I thought and prayed would never happen.  I see more of the bigotry and hatred that I thought had been left behind.  I see addiction to money and power, and greater disregard for human life.  Even life itself has become disposable. 

All the while, I also hear Jesus’ words that He is with me at all times.  The Holy Spirit moves in ways I cannot foresee or understand.  I still see love, compassion, caring and great sacrifice in the service of others.   I look at my brothers and sisters at Mass knowing God lives in each one.  I recall the admonition, “Do not be afraid”.  I must change what I can.  “I don’t want to live like this, but I don’t want to die.”
Ray Frink

August 24, 2023 - Service
I have previously mentioned that ‘The Servant as Leader’ is an important book chapter for me, written by Robert Greenleaf, in which he expresses that true leadership grows from listening, discernment, and service in action.  Robert Greenleaf was a Quaker who believed his ideas of servant leadership applied across all faiths and institutions.  I believe that this is true for myself when I look at how I am of service, and I use these factors to evaluate those who seek leadership roles in the public forum.   Fr Henri Nouwen clarified Greenleaf’s concept of service.  Fr Nouwen said “We are touching the profound spiritual truth that service is an expression of the search for God and not just of the desire to bring about individual or social change.”

Fr Nouwen gives me a more focused and at the same time broader view of service.  It is in my search for God (I am still on the journey) that I look to service to point the way.  Whether I am lector, managing the collection, or helping ushers after mass, my focus is making someone else’s life a little easier, a tiny gift for them on their journey.  At the dismissal from mass, I go forth and expand my narrow one-hour focus to embrace the rest of my week at home and to whatever activities I commit my time, talent and treasure.   Both of these thinkers help me see service as a journey, with action along the way, always drawing me closer to God.
Ray Frink

August 25, 2023 - Speaker for the Dead
In the science fiction book series, Ender’s Game, one subtitle is ‘Speaker for the Dead’.  The title caused me to think about our history, the bias built into our social structures, and our environmental responsibility.  It is said by many good people that they are not biased or wasteful consumers, nor do they foul the environment.  Thus they are not personally responsible for the actions of previous generations.  For them, personal responsibility ends at personal guilt. 

The story of Zacchaeus (Luke 19:1-10) describes a different response to past evil.  Zacchaeus committed to a new life in the teachings of Jesus.  He acknowledges that he has benefited from previous actions of those like him.  He declares in Luke 19:8, “Behold, half of my possessions, Lord, I shall give to the poor, and if I have extorted anything from anyone, I shall repay it four times over.”  Zacchaeus acknowledges that he has benefited from actions in the past and it is not enough to be good.  If I have benefited from evil done in the past, even if I had no part in it, I am responsible for correcting the evil in whatever ways are still available.  I must be a Speaker for the Dead.  Whether it is the treatment of people of color or the marginalized, or abuse of the environment, if I have benefited from wrongs done in the past, I am called to address these in the present.  I am called to speak for those who cannot speak.
Ray Frink

August 26, 2023 - Useless
Henri Nouwen, the priest and spiritual writer said: “We human beings can suffer immense deprivations with great steadfastness, but when we sense that we no longer have anything to offer to anyone, we quickly lose our grip on life”.  This brings me to a confession.   There were many reasons for me to retire when I did.  Those reasons included my age and health, the physical demands of my chosen profession, and other interests I wished to explore while I still possessed the physical and mental abilities to do so.  One reason I have never revealed is that I wanted to retire before I became useless, before I was just marking time and getting a paycheck for doing the routine. 

My moment of uselessness never came and given my life in retirement, I probably could have practiced longer.  Still, Nouwen’s words ring in my head.  I ask myself if I know anyone who may feel useless?   This applies to the young, the middle aged, and the elderly.  It applies to the teen, the unemployed, the homeless, and the successful.  I ask myself if there are ways I can let them know that they are important, that they have something to offer, and that I recognize what that is.

Jesus loves me to the fullest regardless of what I have to offer. I can be a source of God’s love.  As long as I can offer love and let others know they are loved, I and they are never useless.                    
Ray Frink  

August 27, 2023 - Which Direction
Ambrose Redmoon said: Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgement that something else is more important than fear.  My first job as a 16-year-old was as a lifeguard in an inner-city swimming pool.  It involved 1/3 child care, 1/3 crowd control, and 1/3 lifeguard.  There were physical threats, challenges interacting with the public, and diligence watching the water.  I rarely considered my personal safety.   I delivered the baby of the first known HIV positive mom at the Kaiser San Francisco hospital.  I am sure my fellow residents would have done the same.  I was cautious and brought a healthy infant into the world.  I joke with a good friend of mine that we raised our sons wrong.  I am kidding, but our oldest sons chose careers where they run toward danger instead of away from it.  Any parent whose child has chosen a career in any form of first responder understands this.  I and they are not thrill seekers.  We just understand that to be of service, you sometimes have to risk your physical self. 
           
Jesus understood this from the time of his first awareness of divinity.  He tried to avoid dangerous situations until the end.  Then, after the Resurrection, the Holy Spirit was sent to guide and protect the early church and for all time.  This is not a protection from physical or emotional harm.  It is a protection of the soul.  Jesus words are clear:  Do not be afraid to serve.
Ray Frink

Reflections for August 14-20, 2023
August 14, 2023 -Unravelling

I often refer to religious experiences that happened to me through the Cursillo movement.  Sometimes they come naturally, other times they come as if it’s an all new awareness, an
Awakening, an epiphany.  As a cradle Catholic, you’d think there wouldn’t be that many surprises as you grow older.  Yet surprises there have been.  Among the many things I have learned through the Cursillo, three things stand out:  Piety, Study, and Action.  Of special note has been the revelation of translations between Greek and Hebrew that have deepened my understanding and appreciation of the Catholic Faith.  For example, all my life I’ve thought that the words “It is finished” as Jesus agonized on the cross meant that his earthly life was over.  In pursuing study, I learned that Greek for “It is finished” was an accounting term that meant “the debt is paid” — which means more to me than just saying “it’s over.”  That truly was an epiphany for me, giving me a whole new sense of Jesus’ teachings.  Another term I came to grips with had to do with the “Holy Ghost.”  From the time I began to pray, I never could figure out how a ghost was the third person of God.  Someone else must have been having trouble too, so they went back in translation, and discovered that Ghost was another word for spirit, or wind.  To me, the third person of the trinity became the breath of God, breathing life into me, giving me the spirit of love, imbuing me with various gifts.  It’s totally amazing what has happened when I put the gifts of piety, study, and action into my spiritual life.
Don Eagle

August 15, 2023 - Personal Prayer

Moments of recognizing Jesus in my life don’t happen rarely, they happen all the time.  He is with me in the morning sun and the evening shade.  He is with me when I cross the street or wheel a grocery cart.  He is with me when I am challenged or, in the depths of silence, in reflection or in times of joy.  God, through the Holy Trinity has writ large on not only our souls, but on the whole of creation.  Sometimes I stand back in awe of witnessing the beauty, the power, and the logic of his works.  He is reflected in the innocence of a child, in the miracle of life itself, in the glory of the everyday. 

The second leg of the Cursillo is to speak to God himself through something called Piety.  Using that I go to him for help, I praise him for all that I am given, I go to him speechless.  It is in these moments of spiritual conversation that I become closer, that I can speak to my Abba on a level unshared by others.  Somehow, I frequently find this Piety moment during Mass, when, surrounded by friends, family, and maybe a few hundred others, my mind slips away to silent conversation with Jesus.  I share, He listens.  I listen to see what will be written on my heart.  And then, after such a wonderful respite, I drift back to time and place, somehow renewed and aware that there is still so much to learn about true Piety.
Don Eagle

August 16, 2023 - Coming Together at Last (Eulogies)
During my lifetime, I’ve said my share of eulogies.  They’re intended to define that dash on the old tombstone that separates the year of birth and the year of death, to fill in that dash with the highlights of a lifetime.  They comfort the living and support the Christian promise of everlasting life. Above all, they are a reflective and moving tribute to the deceased.  Every eulogy has an underlying purpose as well.  It not only highlights a life, it also draws people together.  As an example, I was once asked to deliver the eulogy for a car-pool friend.  I was quite surprised, and very honored.  We had car-pooled and worked together for a few years, driving the daily trip from Grass Valley to Sacramento.  During those years, I learned of his family, and his hopes and dreams for the future.  But we were not close friends but I had learned that one side of his family hated the other side, his children didn’t speak to each other, hardly anyone was close to his wife. 

When he passed, rather than dig up a lot of nonsense about how close he was to everyone, I sent out a note to each of his kids, to his in-laws, his wife, and just about everyone he was at all close to.  I asked each of them to write a short paragraph on what he meant to them and how he had impacted their lives.  When I sewed them all together, this multi-tribute was the eulogy.  It turned out to be an eye-opener for all of them.  It turned out to be the family he had always wanted.  I like to think that Jesus smiled when he saw peace descending on all of them.
Don Eagle

August 17, 2023 -The Cursillo Challenge

Action is the third leg of the Cursillo base, joining study and action. In previous meditations, I discussed Piety as a personal prayer to God and Study as the discovery.  Now I want to look at Action as not only taking the first two as direction, but to actually putting them into evangelization.  At the Ascension, the apostles were addressed by two angels who asked you “men of Galilee, why do you stand about?”  In other words, now’s the time to get going and take action.   

I was drawn to the Cursillo movement ten years ago.  Like most people who have gone through this three-day weekend program, I found it to be an exhilarating experience and felt that “nothing was the same” afterwards.  It was not only transformative, but it continues to make my “walk with Christ” ongoing.  I not only have a deeper relationship with my religion, but I have also discovered that there are many others with similar spiritual feelings as well.  It was an eye-opener, and well worth the experience.  One of the most interesting by-products of going through the Cursillo movement is how participation in it is put into action.  I’ve noticed Cursillistas are involved at every level of the liturgy, from ushering, teaching, lectoring, working with prisoners, the poor, and on and on;  all of us trying to be more Christlike, to get going, and not to stand about, to become truly the hands and feet of God. 
Don Eagle

August 18, 2023 - Removing Barnacles

I think that one of my more interesting experiences in the Navy had to do with confession.  I’d like to share it, as it might bring a smile or two to your face.

The US Navy has 485 or so ships.  The Catholic Church does not have 485 or so extra priests to provide each ship with a Chaplain.  Rather, it has 52.  Therefore, the smaller ships are only occasionally visited by a priest. Maybe once every couple of years. 
We happened to be visiting Naples, Italy as part of a Mediterranean cruise when we learned that we would have a priest come aboard to hear confessions.  This visitor didn’t generate much interest from the crew members until the big day arrived.  After the first few confessions were heard, word spread quickly that the priest was Italian, spoke only Italian, and couldn’t understand English.  Well, suddenly the confessional was inundated with penitent sailors. The line became long, the doling out of penances was short, and everyone was relieved to get the blessing, said in Italian or not, and everyone understood.  Though somewhat amusing, this speaks to the universality of our church; of the ability to transcend language barriers to partake of a sacrament the world over.  Regardless of how one might feel about taking advantage of a situation such as this, I need to tell you that when the priest walked across the gangplank at the end of the day, there was a sense of fulfillment by both he and the crew members whom he had seen.  The experience was miraculous.  We were washed clean.  (Lovato pulito)
Don Eagle

August 19, 2023 - Witnessing Real Love

It happened right here at SS Peter and Paul during a Sunday night Mass.  Sitting directly in front of us was a mother and daughter, probably ages 45 and 65-70.  It was communion time, and we went first.  When we returned to our pew, the mother and daughter were just coming back to theirs.  Then something extraordinary happened. The daughter helped the mother get settled, and then very gently and very lovingly bent down to her mother and whispered “I love you mom.”

It was unbelievable to witness such a tender moment, to observe love in its most beautiful form, to be drawn into such an act of love by being a mere witness. I don’t know either of them, but seeing what transpired somehow changed me.  I occasionally see them at Mass, and they’ll never know how much I admire them nor how often I think of the loving bond they have between themselves.  Unknowingly, they have been an example to follow.  Sometimes I see them and think of my own mother.  Did anyone during her lifetime ever bend down to whisper “I love you mom”?  Somehow, Mother’s Day cards, toasts, birthday and Christmas cards just can’t capture a moment like this that is so pure, so simple, and so meaningful.

This may be the shortest reflection I’ve written.   Despite it being about one of the shortest spiritual experiences I’ve ever encountered, it’s this kind of thing that can create the longest and most beautiful of memories.
Don Eagle

August 20, 2023 - Walking in the Field of Stars

One of the items on my personal bucket list is the walk.  Not just any walk, mind you, but the walk from France, or Portugal or Spain to the cathedral known as Santiago de Campostela.  (Saint James in the Field of Stars).  This cathedral is in uppermost Spain and has been a pilgrim’s destination since the 11th century. It is purportedly the place where the bones of St. James the Apostle lie.  The cathedral itself is a magnificent structure that had its beginnings in the year 1105.  It is one of the most beautiful in all of Europe.  But aside from the beauty of the cathedral, the walk itself becomes the journey of a soul.  Countless stories have been written or otherwise told of the experiences of such a pilgrimage, including a modern film featuring Martin Sheen. Today on Facebook there are personal glimpses into current pilgrims. Making the two-month walk has to be the spiritual experience of a lifetime, and has been made by parishioners here at SS Peter & Paul.  The culmination of such a journey is the arrival at the Medieval cathedral, witnessing a giant incense censer, and seeing the crypt of St. James.  Though I have spent some time there on a trip to Portugal, I missed doing the walk.  In my mind, it has to be an incredible journey, knowing that at the end of your walk you will have discovered not only your own soul, but an understanding of the spirituality of the millions who have already made the walk through the millennia.
Don Eagle

Reflections for August 7-13, 2023
August 7, 2023 - Transfiguration
Jesus tells Peter, James and John at the transfiguration: “Rise and do not be afraid.”. 
And then they come down the mountain.  It seems to me that we also have moments where we are overwhelmed and graced with God’s presence.  Whether at the Eucharist or at the birth of a child, the death of a loved one who has lived a long life, or in the beauty of creation, I am given moments of clarity, moments where God is right there, tangible.  And then those moments fade, and I go back down the mountain… back to the routines of life, and back to missing the miracles right in front of me.  The disciples hear, “this is my Son in whom I am well pleased.”  They are in awe. But later they go on to deny Jesus and abandon him at the crucifixion.  It’s so hard, as humans, to continue to hold on to and trust my moments of actually knowing the truth.

I’ve come to think that the goal is not to try to stay in those moments (as if I have any control over that).  I think the gift is to trust the knowing.  And perhaps to let it change us over time… So that when I see my neighbor, whatever their condition, I hear, “this too is my beloved son or daughter.”
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio

August 8, 2023 - The Wedding Lasso
There have already been reflections on the yoke that Jesus offers us, but I would like to offer one more because this image sticks with me.  As a young person, I imaged that Matthew meant I am the ox, and Jesus drives the cart… the yoke is better than the heavy ones that other oxen endure, but it was still not very attractive. Eventually I learned that Jesus was inviting me to be yoked to him, to let him share the weight of life.  Even then, I still imagined God behind us driving the cart!  And since I didn’t live on a farm, I had no appreciation for this image and just wanted to call the SPCA.

Now I love the image of Jesus taking the space next to me as the stronger one, helping carry the weight. He humbles himself to come beside me, not to drive me. He will be my life partner.  In our trinitarian understanding, he IS God, God who chooses to come to earth to meet me in a way I can relate to. What a difference that understanding makes! 

In Mexico, weddings often include a lasso ceremony where a rope with two loops is placed over the couple to connect them.  I think this is what God offers me/us—a wedding lasso, a link that reminds me that in all things in life we are connected.  God, it is your very breath that gives me life. You sustain me, and you share my life experiences.
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio
 

August 9, 2023 - God’s Lessons from Blackberries
We walk in the early mornings—quiet walks down country roads, time for prayer and introspection. In summer, it’s also time to pick blackberries!  These picking adventures have become spiritual lessons.   Our walks often offer surprises—a fawn, a coyote, a tiny bird, a nest of bunnies.  It is important to pay attention.  It is as if God’s saying, Look!  I am doing something new! Miracles are all around us if we have eyes to see.

Blackberries ripen at different times.  Each clump has green ones that are just developing, red and purple ones that are not ready yet (and sour). When the black ones are at their peak ripeness, they come off easily.  If it doesn’t give gently into my hand, it’s not meant for me today.  Everything has its time.  Forcing something before its time usually doesn’t have a good outcome.

The blackberries are for everybody. I was annoyed when the patch that I had been watching carefully was picked by someone else.  I had staked a claim to those berries! Then I saw how the berries come in a steady flow throughout the summer… There is abundance, enough for everybody!  Imagine how the world could be if we remembered that?

I’ve learned that when I’m looking longingly at big plump berries out of reach deep in the bush, there is usually a similar berry right at my feet, unnoticed, waiting.  God’s that way…always there…waiting for me to notice. Not something I have to work for, but pure gift.
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio
 

August 10, 2023 - Pondering Wheat and Weeds…Again
I helped facilitate a retreat for spiritual director interns recently at Mercy, and our theme was connected to that Sunday’s scripture about the wheat and the weeds.  We reflected on how the wheat and weeds grow up together in each of us.  Sometimes I can’t tell the difference between wheat and weeds.  I used to think I could.  I could even be self-righteous in calling a weed a weed, particularly in someone else’s yard.  But I mistook my weeds for wheat, and sometimes I would obsess about what I thought was a weed, only to see it really was wheat.  My Dad was the county agricultural agent at Rutgers University.  He taught us that a weed is a plant that just happens to be in a place where you don’t want it to grow. 
The Spirit helps us do our inner work, and we often find that a weed that bothers us has something to teach us.  As I learn to understand where my weeds come from, how they got planted, they often shrivel up on their own.  I’ve learned to be patient with my weeds, to hold them gently, listen to the fear or anger or insecurity that may have planted them.  As I learn to recognize the source of my feelings and judgements, they shift and release their tight hold.  Self-righteousness gives way to compassion, old wounds teach me to be a healer for others.  And I realize God is able to turn weeds to wheat.
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio
  
August 11, 2023 - Calling All Rhinos
There is poster and tee shirt designed by Allan Faustino that features a rhino running on a treadmill (There are other versions of this easily found by Googling rhino on treadmill).  The rhino is working hard and sweating. On the wall is a poster of a studly unicorn on its hind legs—the picture of perfection.  While the design is meant to humorously inspire motivation, I think it also offers a spiritual message.  The unicorn isn’t real. It’s a fantasy.  The little rhino is working very hard to be something he is not.  I think he reminds us how often we obsess about our perceived weaknesses and faults and expect ourselves (and others) to be more perfect, more holy, more… you name it. For me this is a message of grace. God loves my rhino self.  I/we are perfect in God’s eyes, just the way we are. I can only become the best version of my rhino self if I take down my unicorn posters—my obsessions with what others think I should be.  I’ve learned that self-critiquing is also closely related to critiquing others.  If the goal is an unattainable unicorn self, then I consciously and unconsciously judge everyone else by that standard.  Sometimes, we, as church, judge the “unchurched;” we, “the moral,” judge the “immoral,” etc.  I think God calls all of us rhinos to experience God’s unconditional love that gifts us with the path to be our best, most holy, rhino selves.
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio

August 12, 2023 - Cafeteria Catholics
My friend, Daryl Grigsby wrote a wonderful article that was published in the NCR in which he
he upends the term, “cafeteria Catholics,”.  In it he points out that term is usually used to criticize another believer implying that he or she picks and chooses only what is convenient. The wonderful point he makes is that in some ways we are all cafeteria Catholics, in that the richness of the Catholic faith allows for many forms of expression, diverse authors, diverse ministries, etc. And our faith values the importance of my ongoing discernment.  I am a work in progress, struggling daily to be a better disciple. We all are.  I love that we can embrace our differences, and that our Catholic identity is not predictive of our political perspectives.  The beauty of the Catholic Church, and in my experience our parish family, is it includes room for all of us.  We are one Body, even as we struggle to discern how we live out our faith and how we love one another.  And, I believe we are joined in Christ’s body in our brokenness.  I can never be worthy of my place at the Table or my place in the Body.  It is Jesus who invites me, and you, and everyone.  God calls us in our brokenness and imperfections to be wounded healers to each other, to form inclusive communities of unconditional love, and to extend that love to all. 
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio

August 13, 2023 - Lessons from our Puppies
We are puppy parents!  Three days after returning from a trip to Egypt and Jordan, we brought home two 8 week-old Labrador Retriever puppies.  What were we thinking???!!! It has been 15 years since we last had a puppy, and memories have faded.  Like child birth, once it’s over, you only remember the good parts.  In the last several weeks, we have experienced the joy of two energic balls of fur that adore us, and we have experienced their constant need for attention, their vulnerability, and their growing sense of independence and adventure. I have tried to practice relaxing my tense shoulders and deep breathing through their eating of our antique phonograph, and I am gaining lessons in living in the present moment. They help me clarify what’s important and what’s not.  I hope I can take advantage of life’s lessons that are given in simple things like adjusting to new routines and priorities, in order to prepare for life’s harder challenges that inevitably come…  We are in control of very little in life, it turns out.  The sooner I understand that and hold everything gently and loosely, the more I will be able to trust God’s presence and support throughout the cycles and transitions of life.  Deacon Bob talked about God’s providence in his homily a few weeks ago.  I appreciate the reminder that in all things, God works for good.  I can trust and don’t have to hold the reigns quite so tightly. 
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio

 

Reflections for July 31-August 6, 2023
Monday, July 31, 2023—Mama

Last week I dreamt about my grandma. She died unexpectedly in April and the hole in my heart is a wide chasm for a woman I loved so deeply. I’ve written about my grandma here so many times— the woman who taught me the rosary, who made me tamales, who adorned her table with a red & white checkered tablecloth. Now she rests beside my Papa, and I am left only with memories of people who I loved so deeply.

In my dream I had the opportunity to go back in time and say goodbye, even though only I knew it was a goodbye. I held her in my arms and hugged her tiny but strong body until I awoke from my dream full of both joy—because she was truly present to me—and sadness, because it was over. As I have reflected on this dream, I have thought often of the Apostles when Jesus returned to them after the Resurrection. I can only imagine the great joy they must have felt and the confusion that followed when he finally left them again. Like the Apostles, I know that she left me with work to do, so even in my sadness, I am called to carry on.
Erin Gallawa

Tuesday, August 1—Holy Water

My uncles and my mom unearthed many surprises while clearing out my grandma’s home. There were the expected things— clothing, dishes and years’ worth of paperwork, boxes of photos, furniture and costume jewelry. But there were unexpected surprises too. My grandma had been using an old crockpot as a flowerpot in her backyard. There were more statues of Mary than she had grandkids. And there was a LOT of holy water! They found a jug and a bottle of holy water from Lourdes, lovingly labeled; one of the dates read 1994! We also found an ordinary water bottle marked in Sharpie which said “River Jordan.” All this water is now in my house, water that made its way from holy lands almost three decades ago and now sits in my home, waiting for an occasion to bless someone. This water is made holy because of its origin, perhaps a blessing from a priest, and now blessed even more because it is a gift from Mama, who continues to remind us of our holiness even though she is gone.
Erin Gallawa

Wednesday, August 2, 2023—Lessons from the Paddleboard, Part 1
The water might be smooth as glass, but if you are not prepared for the wake of a passing boat, you will fall in.
Earlier this year I got a paddleboard! A friend of mine invited me out for my maiden voyage on a cool night in early June. I do not have great balance, so the paddleboard is a challenge for me. But the water was smooth as glass and the cool temperatures meant there were no boats out. After we had ridden out, enjoyed our drinks and snacks, we put on our long sleeves for the cool ride back and set out. By that point I was feeling confident on the board, and at that moment a speed boat went by; unprepared for the wake, I was knocked off my board fully dressed into the cold water.
When everything is going well in life, faith can start to feel easy. At moments when there are no challenges and life is going according to plan, I have found myself becoming complacent in my faith journey. Maybe I pray less, don’t prioritize Mass attendance, or don’t center my life around Christ. That is always the moment when something unexpected happens, the moment when I’m not prepared because I have removed all the supports that keep me balanced. I pray that I will keep vigilant in my faith so that I am always ready for what comes my way!             Erin Gallawa

Thursday, August 3, 2023—Lessons from the Paddleboard, Part 2
Pay attention to the direction of the wind.
Wind is a formidable force. If you paddle out with the wind, it feels easy and smooth--you feel like you can paddle forever! Suddenly you are several miles from the start and when you turn around, you find that you have a bigger challenge on the way back. When wind is on your side, you might not even know it is there. But when you are going against it, it can feel like paddling into a wall of bricks. When we allow the Holy Spirit to guide us, our faith life has direction and purpose; with the Holy Spirit’s guidance, it may feel like life is moving effortlessly in the right direction! But when we turn around and go against what the Holy Spirit is calling us to do, the work is hard. I pray that I will pay attention to the direction the Holy Spirit is pushing me, so that I do not fight against the will of God!                                                                                                Erin Gallawa

Friday, August 4, 2023—Lessons from the Paddleboard, Part 3
Paddling is more fun with friends.
While I’m fully capable of blowing up my board and paddling alone, it’s not nearly as fun and fulfilling as when people I love want to go with me. Since getting my paddleboard earlier this year, I have enjoyed evenings with friends and with my daughter. Every experience has been a little different based on who I’ve been with, but each of those excursions has helped me find peace and enjoy God’s creation. As always, this made me ever grateful for our SS. Peter and Paul faith community. Our faith is fuller and more fun to practice when we are together! In this parish I am blessed by many different communities of people: my fellow moms, the RCIA team plus the candidates and sponsors who have journeyed through our program, and the many men and women who I am blessed to worship along side of each Sunday at Mass. I have a personal relationship with God, but it is more fun and fulfilling because of each of you who are by my side!  Erin Gallawa

Saturday, August 5, 2023—Home
My girls just finished their 7^th season of swimming on the same swim team that my brother and sister and I grew up on. As I sat at the end of the season awards ceremony and watched the children of other former swimmers walk up on the stage, I was touched by the fact that this team had such a profound impact on so many of us that we all brought our children back to this team. Many of us are driving past other programs to be on the Dolphins. When I look around our parish, I witness the same thing. Our community of SS. Peter and Paul is and has always been a special place. Fr. Dillon set the standard for our parish and the community of believers has carried on even as people have come and gone. When I look around on Sunday, I am immensely blessed to see my children serving on the altar in the same place I once stood, I feel honored that friends I met in junior high are worshipping alongside me with our children, and above all, I am grateful for the faces of men and women who have been present there for years, some who I have never met, but who I feel like I know because they have always been there. Today I give thanks to each of you for making SS. Peter and Paul a home that I always want to be part of!
Erin Gallawa

Sunday, August 6, 2023—Ideas
Anyone who has read my reflections knows that I find God most easily in nature. I am constantly in awe of God’s creation when I am standing in a meadow, on a mountain, or next to a river. I see God so easily in my children and have drawn so much inspiration from my grandparents. This time around I was short a few ideas so I asked one of my daughters to give me some prompts. Here were her suggestions: the future, the past, people I love, things pets taught me, how my friends inspire me, the way I think about people, the ways other people think about me, and how I see happiness in my everyday life. I was pretty impressed with this list by a 12 year old! I didn’t actually end up writing about any of them this week, but it did get me thinking about how I see God and where I am looking for inspiration. Her simple list has inspired me to look in different places for lessons from God. I am accepting her challenge to open my eyes and my heart and find God in new places!                                                                                                    
Erin Gallawa

Reflections for July 24-30, 2023

July 24, 2023 – Christ Is Everywhere
General Kevin Chilton, a former NASA astronaut, had the rare privilege of taking the Eucharist 250 miles above the earth. As the Space Shuttle approached the dark side of the earth, Kevin and 2 other Catholic astronauts said prayers and received the Body of Christ. He said there was not a dry eye in the shuttle during that experience. We are called to bring the Good News to the ends of the earth, but they went beyond the earth and took the Good News, Jesus Christ, to the universe. Can you imagine what that must have been like:  sharing the God of the Universe in the universe. Even though that is probably one of the most spectacular places to receive Communion, it is of no less importance when taking the Eucharist to the homebound in our community. The greatest experience imaginable is not where we receive Him; it is that we receive Him. We are receiving Christ himself, his body and blood, and not some symbol of Him,  making this experience the greatest of all. We receive His living presence in us, so we become one with Christ. And it brings my heart to tears that so many Christians do not know this and so many Catholics have doubts about it. It is my prayer that we all come to understand that in receiving Him we become Him.
Kurt Peterson

July 25, 2023 – Sparkle
Some of the best sources of inspiration for my reflections come from doing things around the house. This time it came from cleaning the windows. After the long winter we had and the busy spring of family events I was able to take a day and wash the windows inside and out. I knew the outside was going to be dirty;  you could see the dirt coming off the screens and windows. It looked just like those Fuller Brush commercials. However, I was surprised by the hazy nature of the inside panes. I used hot water and a microfiber towel and when I rinsed the towel the water would darken because of the grime. When the job was done, the windows sparkled.
We are like windows. The last few years have darkened our vision with the dirt and dust of all that has gone on. It is impossible to escape the reality that some of the grime seeps inside of us and makes us see less clearly.  But it is our faith as Catholics that we can begin to see again through the celebrations of the sacraments. When I participate in the Mass, I am washed by the word of God, then scrubbed and dried by the Eucharist. I again sparkle and go forth into the world to bring the Good News. Not only can I see my mission more clearly, but others can clearly see Christ through me.
Kurt Peterson

July 26, 2023 – I Am
G. K. Chesterton was once asked by a reporter the question, “In your opinion what is wrong with the world?” His answer was precise and simple, “I am”. This is not the “I am” told to Moses by God in the burning bush. He meant “me”; it is me that is wrong with the world. Take a moment to let that answer sink in. He could have said we are, but he didn’t, he said I am. If I truly want the world to be a better place it must first start by looking inward to see where I have contributed to the current state of the world. Things can never be better until I change my own attitude and actions in the world.
 When our children were younger and there was a squabble with a friend, Sarah would ask them to think about what their part was in the squabble. She helped them pull back from the issues to look at it in a different way. Sometimes things just happen to us that we had no part in but that is not always the case. Usually there is something that we did to help exacerbate the problem. Like Chesterton, I am the problem, and I must always be looking at making myself better.
Kurt Peterson

July 27, 2023 - K.I.S.S.
We have all heard of the KISS method,” Keep it simple, stupid”. This is a design principle coined by the U.S. Navy in 1960. The KISS principle states that most systems work best if they are kept simple rather than made complicated; therefore, simplicity should be a key goal in design, and unnecessary complexity should be avoided. I think the same principle should be applied in our understanding of God and faith. We can never fully understand who God is because our framework for any understanding comes from the limited confines of our existence. We are limited by our body. We are limited by our use of language, we are limited by time and space, and we are limited because everything we see on earth has a beginning and end. But God has no shackles to bound Him. God is outside of time and space. God always was, is now and forever shall be. He is unchanging. That is why when Moses asked who do I say sent me, God said, “ehyeh asher ehyeh”, “I will be who I will be”. The Father may be beyond our understanding, but we can know Him through His Son Jesus. Jesus said, if you know me, you know the father because I and the father are one.  I can know Jesus as a role model, a brother, a friend. I can know Jesus through the scriptures and the homilies I hear every week. I know Jesus through the saints and the saintly people I interact with every day. Knowing Jesus is simple. By connecting to Him in daily prayer and in communion with one another we will know Him, and we will also know the Father.
Kurt Peterson

July 28, 2023 – The Godfather
Throughout our Christian history there has been a great debate about the subject of Faith and Works. The letter of Saint James addresses this very debate. He does not separate Faith from works and he poses the question in chapter 2 verse 14, “What good is it, my brothers, if someone says they have faith but does not have works? Can that faith save him? Faith is Gods grace to us. We cannot earn salvation on our own buy only receive it through the grace of faith from God. But once we have faith, works are the outward sign of that faith. I think the best illustration of that is in the movie The Godfather:  as Michael Corleone is becoming godfather to his sister’s child, he is reciting the vow of Renunciation around the baptismal font as we see all of his enemies being killed. That scene has always stuck with me as an example of how faith and works are not separate. Faith comes from God, but our works come from our faith. Works is an expression of our faith. I think that is why Jesus had no patience for those religious leaders. Their actions or works did not match their appearance of faith. And that is way I need to look at myself in the mirror and ask, “How am I living my faith?”
Kurt Peterson

July 29, 2023 - The Changing Table
In most bathrooms at malls or airports there are changing tables where parents can have a clean and comfortable place to change their child. That got me thinking about the altar at church:  it is our spiritual changing table. Have you ever wondered why we begin the Mass with the act of contrition? Why do we ask forgiveness for the things we have done or the things we failed to do? Because we are human, messing up is what we do, but we also long to be what God intended us to be. I shouldn’t  come to church to show everyone how wonderful I am, but I come to be changed. I come to ask for forgiveness, to praise His greatness and to learn how to become what God intended me to be. I am changed and renewed to go forth into the world again. And then I return once more to be changed.
Kurt Peterson

July 30, 2023 – Moon
Since the beginning of time humans have been fascinated with the moon. In ancient times we guided our travels by it, determined our planting and harvesting by it, and we have even been frightened by it when it disappeared in a lunar eclipse. Moonlight allows us to see at night, but it is not the moon that generates the light, it merely reflects the light that it receives from the sun.  In a spiritual sense I too am like the moon. When I allow Christ’s love for us to come into my life, I let His love shine out of me. Just as the moon reflects the light of the sun, I reflect the light of the Son. When I allow the Christ light to reflect in me, I am sharing Christ with others and that is the mission for all of us:  to be bearers of God’s love to the world.
Kurt Peterson

Reflections for July 17-23, 2023

July 17, 2023 – I Prefer the Sword (Ref. Matthew 10:34-36)
Jesus speaks about the conflicts that may be caused by accepting his teaching for those of traditional religious practices or who read scripture literally. He says, “Do not think that I have come to bring peace upon the earth. I have come to bring not peace, but the sword.” (Matthew 10:34). He warned that this may even happen within families. Recognizing that religion was at the center of human life in those days, we can understand the gravity of this statement. But this challenge happens even in our time in different ways.
The conflicts: My daily choices - are they pleasing to God? Every action of my daily life should be in line with God’s will. But I know in my human weakness, my selfish interests sometimes divert me, and I walk the wrong path. Such situations are a constant challenge in our lives - falling into comfort zones where we tend to indulge in worldly pleasures, forgetting Jesus and all that He offers.   
There I need Jesus! I should place myself before him, and His sword will cut  away everything I do not need in my life. It may look like I am losing peace in this fight. But Jesus’ sword brings peace by slicing down what is not good for me. In the end, there is great peace of mind. 
Bony

July 18, 2023 - Never Miss Any Golden Chance. (Matthew 11:20-24)
We see Jesus use sharp language (‘woe to you’) against the towns of Chorazin, Bethsaida and Capernaum, which had witnessed his mighty deeds but failed to believe. They had ample opportunities to witness the Son of God and his great deeds. They would be judged by God like the cities of Tyre, Sidon and Sodom (symbols of wickedness).
This passage speaks about opportunities to be with Jesus as a believer. In enormous ways, God has given me chances to know him. He has called me that I might be with him and be sent out to preach (Rf. Mark 3: 13 -14). Through the Sacrament of Baptism, I am united with him, and as an ordained priest I have many chances to know Him and His ways.  This call asks a personal commitment of me, something which I should not fail. I pray Jesus will be tolerant with me! I want to treat this as a golden chance of having been blessed living in the grace of God. And I need to be more productive in the Kingdom of God.
Bony

July 19, 2023 - Childlike Reception of God. (Matthew 11:25-27)
God reveals Himself in the person of Jesus (Matthew 11:27) and Jesus reveals his Father to us. Jesus praises the Father for revealing this mystery to the childlike for the children believed him without any reservation. The learned of His time were critical and did not accept him, for their eyes were closed and they claimed that they knew everything; whereas his disciples heard his calling, followed him, and trusted him. In turn Jesus reveals himself to them.
There were times I have acted the same way.  Some years ago, while serving in Social Services in my home diocese, I attended a workshop. During this program, I became restless and acted on it. I commented to the presenter “are you treating us as children?” The sin of pride took charge of me, and I forgot that everything I have is from God and God is the source of everything. I forgot that a childlike attitude and dependency on God will help us grow in humility to see others with God’s eyes. Jesus, help me to foster the virtue of humility and simplicity.
Bony

July 20, 2023 - The Yoke (Matthew 11:28-30)
Jesus invites us to share our burden with him. In this team process he is urging us to learn from him. Torah (the Law) was considered to be a yoke; Jesus offers an easier yoke of Love. Remember though,  Jesus does not propose we go yoke-less.
We all have burdens which we carry in our daily life. It is really consoling to know that Jesus is there to help us. But the question here then, is do I go to Jesus only when I need him? No, I need to be with him always, to be bonded with him. His yoke connects us with him; the yoke of the world which we depend on most of the time will not give us rest but his yoke will. I have seen this with my mother; I have seen her sitting for a long time in the presence of the Blessed Sacrament. She has told me that she gives all of her worries to Jesus and she gets peace and comfort. This relationship reminds me of true friendship; just like a true friend, Jesus will be at my side to comfort me in worries, to share the yoke of disappointment, slavery, despair. Jesus will be there always on my side when I accept his invitation ‘Come to me… ‘
Bony
July 21, 2023 - Jesus, the Defense. (Matthew 12:1-8)
Jesus defended the disciples who were accused by Pharisees for breaking the Sabbath law. In fact, the Old Testament gives a simple command to keep the sabbath holy (Exodus 20: 8-11) and later, nearly thirty-nine jobs were added to the list as forbidden acts on a sabbath day. Knowing his disciples well, he found justification for the work of picking grains on the sabbath. Jesus did not put on the role of law enforcer to judge his disciples who were hungry. He looked into their hearts and saw their intention. Jesus refines the meaning of Sabbath. He is compassionate; he desires mercy not sacrificial rituals alone. Moreover, these disciples were already with the Lord of the Sabbath.
Sometimes, I have faced these kinds of situations; I feel sorry for those who criticize the Church from a conservative mindset not judging with the heart of Jesus, but through rubrics alone. Liturgical rubrics help us to celebrate Jesus with our brothers and sisters meaningfully with a compassionate heart. After all, we observe Sabbath in its right sense when we are in Jesus and with Jesus.
Bony

July 22, 2023 - My Lord (John 20:11-18)
This post resurrection narrative gives us a glimpse of the personal attachment of Mary Magdalene to Jesus. Unlike the disciples, she courageously came to the tomb to pay homage to Jesus. John narrates her worry about not finding his body. Later, Jesus himself appeared to her. Initially, she could not recognize the resurrected Body of Christ and then Jesus called her by name ‘Mary’ and her response was “My Lord.”
Mary Magdalene’s concern and later her response to Jesus ‘My Lord’ expresses her heart that throbs for Jesus alone – a deep intimacy with the Lord. I need to create and nurture such a strong relationship with God. Though I may have a full time commitment to the Lord, there are times I have deviated from it just by focusing on daily chores, forgetting Jesus who called me to serve. Every moment of my life should reflect my relationship and attachment to Jesus. He is my Lord!
Bony

 July 23, 2023 - Three in One - Core Values (Matthew 13:24-43)
These three kingdom parables (Parables of The Weeds Among the Wheat, The Mustard Seed and The Yeast) call us to live our Christian life in its fullness – to be good and not to be contaminated by the weeds around us; be a shade for other and be an inspiration for others.
I remember my first-grade teacher, who told me on my ordination day: “I am so happy for you, be a good priest. You will have a lot of opportunities to inspire others and comfort the afflicted.” I still cherish her advice and at times when I fail to be like Jesus ‘who went around doing good and healing everyone … (Acts 10:38), I recall her words and remind myself of my call. After all, I have only one life here on earth, let it be godly, meaningful and fruitful.
Lord Jesus, keep me safe and always guide me to be your good priest after your Sacred Heart. Amen.
Bony

Reflections for July 10-16, 2023
July 10, 2023 - Worker Saints
A couple of weeks ago we celebrated the Feast of Saints Peter and Paul, the patrons of our parish.  As it happened that day coincided with the last week of work (pre retirement) of our liturgical guru, Michelle Pfister.  Fr. Bony likened Saints Peter and Paul to pillars, the support holding up the faith and Church we share and that led me to think about modern day “pillars” of our parish, our church.  There have been more than one in the history of SSPP starting with the founding pastor, Father Michael Dillon, who led the parish for 27 years until his retirement.  Another person who devoted 27 years of her life to various ministries at SSPP is the aforementioned Michelle, a devotee of Liturgical perfection, who also leads a team of people who help non-Catholics discern and study about what it is to be “catholic” which, in most cases, leads to reception in our Faith.  Here we have a modern day “pillar”, both as a rock of foundation and as a leader in proclaiming our faith, a combined Peter and Paul.  Fr. Dillon and Michelle have not been alone in their devotion to the faith and our parish as there are many people who toil day to day meeting the needs of the parish in addition to the needs of family and community.  I have no trouble at all calling them all “worker saints”. 
Deacon David

July 11, 2023 - What’s Your Talent?
Thinking about people who give of themselves unreservedly in service to our parish community got me to thinking about how people respond to the call to participate in the daily needs of the church.  At Mass recently I noticed that everyone except Father involved in any way with aspects of the liturgy were volunteers: altar servers, lectors, eucharistic ministers, ushers, info techs, and musicians.  Each of them, and I’ve talked with many of them, have said something like “…it’s no big deal” when I’ve expressed gratitude or appreciation.  And they may really mean that but, in this 2023 year of service, it is a BIG DEAL for each one of them to share their God given gift(s) and their time.  Of course it is easier to notice some of them, but all of the volunteers have risen to the call to serve and some of them have been doing so for quite some time, while others have stepped out of their comfort zones to try something new and needed. It has been a particular joy for me to note that “graduates” of the R.C.I.A., new Catholics, have responded to the call to serve in various ministries.  While saying “thank you” to these volunteers seems inadequate it is gratifying to see a smile on their faces when they are thanked.  It seems to be enough. I know I’ve left out many other types of volunteers, but I hope you know I love you all.    Thank you and God bless you for the work you do.
Deacon David

July 12, 2023 - Love Your Enemy?!
A recent New York Times Opinion piece by Doctor Anthony Fauci made real to me just what it means not just to forgive one’s enemies but to become friends.  In the early years of the H.I.V/AIDS crisis Dr. Fauci was a voice of U.S. Government in its response to the crisis and his avowed nemesis was a man who referred to Dr. Fauci, in print media, as an “…incompetent idiot.”  Over the ensuing 32 years the two men pursued differing strategies in response to the AIDS crisis, the one provocative and committed and the other reasoned and scientific.  During those years each came to appreciate one another’s sincere attempts to deal with the disease. Somehow they became friends despite the different approaches they pursued.  The other man, Larry Kramer, ultimately wrote and produced a play featuring a character modelled on Dr. Fauci.  Towards the end of his life Mr. Kramer and Dr. Fauci were friends enjoying each other’s company despite their initial adversarial positions and were able to exchange the words “I love you” on parting. This short and sweet recollection from Dr. Fauci brings to life the admonition “Love your enemy” and shows me that there is really nothing someone can say to me that can’t be overcome, even if it takes 32 years, to lead to loving one’s enemy who has become a friend. 
Deacon David

July 13, 2023 - Do You Have a Role Model?
Thinking back on Monday’s reflection and the way Simon Peter and then Paul rose to accept and pursue the path Jesus offered to them leads me to ask this question of myself and maybe you too: What am I being called to do for the faith I profess?  The one aspect I share with Peter and Paul is that I am a human being given life by the triad of my mom, dad and God; without any one of them I would not exist.  I cannot claim the intimate contact with Jesus that both Saints Peter & Paul had but my baptismal vows put me on the same path: prophet, priest and king.  So, on whom is it that I model my life?  There are many uncanonized people who have led lives of witness and holiness, many in quite secular ways such as my Dad who, as far as I know, never missed a day of work in providing for our family; my Mom who was not only a homemaker but helped in providing for the family with paid employment; many Priests and Sisters who modeled lives of simplicity and service to say nothing of the everyday people doing their lives’ work benefiting others.  So my role models have been many and the way they live(d) gives me an example to follow.  How about you?  Whose ways of life have inspired you?  I remember mine in prayers of thanks. 
Deacon David

July 14, 2023 - You Just Never Know
Jane and I moved north from our Southern California roots just over twenty years ago in January 2003.  I’d retired in 2000 and was free to go where the wind blew and, as it happened, Jane got a call from Sierra College seeking a Professor of Philosophy.  She said yes and it was one of the best “yeses” ever.  We both found communities to join which welcomed us.  Jane actually double dipped as she had both Sierra College and Saints Peter and Paul to bond with.  Father Dillon didn’t hesitate to integrate me into a wonderful staff and the RCIA beckoned both of us to continue our long relationship with that process, having been part of the founding team in our Corona parish.  We found a home in Auburn where we’ve lived for twenty years as of this month. But all good things come to an end, and we have found ourselves needing to be closer to two of our daughters in the Sacramento area; so we are looking for a home there and selling our Auburn home.  We cannot, however, divorce ourselves from SSPP and will continue worshiping here.  So the Southern CA transplants have become Northern Californians and grateful for being called and accepted. Truth is, you just never know what God has in store for you, I don’t.        God Bless you all.
Deacon David

July 15, 2023 - Fences
I wrote yesterday of having to move from our home in Auburn and, amongst preparations for selling our house we’ve been repairing a few things, one of which is a leaning fence.  We had the fence put in several years ago, but things don’t last forever and four of the supporting 4” X 4” wooden posts have rotted out at ground level.  Jane made multiple calls to various fence companies, and we’ve been told the job is too small for most of them to consider.  I got two independent contractors who said… no problem and then neither showed up.  Another gave me an estimate to which I said yes.  He’s not shown up either.  So I’ve been thinking a lot about fences lately:  what their purpose is and how difficult it can be to repair them.  I wonder how that might be true about other kinds of fences, barriers that I may have erected in my life, some to separate myself from others as well as those that I have broken down to let others get closer.  Reading the Gospels emphasizes that Jesus put up no barriers between Himself and those he met.  He was always open to the needs of others; aware of his mission to the Jewish people, but excluding no one.  I still have work to do in that regard, in being open to all people in sharing the Good News that I’ve had shared with me by people without fences. 
Deacon David

July 16, 2023 - Do I See?  Do I Hear?  Do I Grow?
Jesus went down to the seaside looking for a bit of relaxation according to today’s Gospel from Matthew.  Relaxation was not to be.  So many people followed him that He had to get in a boat so He could speak to the crowd. It was from the boat that he told the parable of the sower who threw seed out that landed on different kinds of soil. Then Jesus used a scripture passage to explain to His disciples why he used parables to make points about Himself and His Father.  This parable requires that I think about the sower, Jesus, and what sort of ground the seed, truth, falls upon.  The passage from Isaiah which Jesus quoted points out I may hear but not understand, look but not see and need Jesus to heal me.  He goes on to explain about the various places the seed falls and what happens to it.  I’ve worked on my own little patch of garden soil enough to know that the seeds I plant will grow in some places better than others or may not germinate at all.  I too am a garden patch and I am subject to each of the situations Jesus outlines in the parable.  It is up to me to make my soil, myself, a place of welcome to the word, to really hear the word and act on it. 
Deacon David

Reflections for July 3-9, 2023

July 3, 2023- Salt of the Earth
No doubt you remember the words of Jesus, “You are the Salt of the Earth”.  Several years ago, I heard someone say that Jesus used a wonderful analogy because salt is a seasoning.  Its purpose is to enhance whatever it is sprinkled on and if used correctly, one barely notices it is there.  Jesus didn’t say, “You are the Pepper of the Earth” because pepper is a spice, and its flavor noticeably stands out.   This speaks to me of humility and the importance of raising others up, rather than seeking any sort of individual recognition.  Salt is also a preservative, which during the time of Jesus made it a valuable resource.  This reminds me that we are all of value in God’s eyes.  Finally, salt was used as a disinfectant, to cleanse wounds.  Perhaps Jesus is reminding me that I am to bring the healing of God into our world. 
Lord, thank you for using a powerful everyday symbol to remind me of what you ask. 
Darcy Wharton

July 4, 2023- A Day of Celebration
How will you spend this 4^th of July?  One year when our children were young, our family visited Colonial Williamsburg in Virginia, a place where history comes to life.  It is the world’s largest living history museum and I recall being captivated by the many sights, sounds, and stories of colonial life.  For a few hours, we were immersed in life as it once was in America.  We saw blacksmiths, quilters, carpenters, and bakeries.   As you might imagine, the day ended with spectacular fireworks which left the children awestruck.  
In the many years since our visit, it has been easy to forget the real meaning behind today’s celebration.  Our forefathers and mothers risked their own safety to gain independence and in subsequent years, many others have protected our freedom.  It seems that some people are willing to sacrifice when the stakes are high. 
Lord, help me to be willing to sacrifice when needed and let me always be grateful to those who made the ultimate sacrifice to ensure my freedom, including you.
Darcy Wharton

July 5, 2023- A Bold Move
On this day 70 years ago, my adoptive parents met at a swimming pool.  Apparently, my dad saw my mom from a distance laying in the sun, thought she was attractive, and swatted her with his beach towel to get her attention.  Hearing my dad and mom tell this story still shocks me but also makes me laugh.  It sure seems like a bold move!  I also told my mom that there’s no way I would have given any positive attention to someone who whacked me with a towel.  She reminds me that the ways of flirting have changed over the years.  
This bold move, however, resulted in a happy marriage of 69 years.  Perhaps there are times to take a courageous move without any concern for what others might think.  As a Christian, this seems particularly important.  In today’s world, the ways of Jesus may be shocking to some.  I guess it’s never a bad time to make a bold move!
Darcy Wharton

July 6, 2023- Don’t Look Away
It is impossible not to recognize the growing number of homeless people living on our local streets.  This reality is both painful and frustrating.  It can be confusing to determine what one’s role should be in this situation.  Do I support local charities aimed at addressing this issue?  Do I open my wallet or give food when asked?  Do I insist on having more of our tax money go to emergency shelters?
The other day I saw a homeless man holding a sign that said, “Don’t Look Away”.  Clearly, this person has experienced most people looking the other way.  Admittedly, looking away has been my reaction at times.  Looking into the eyes of someone suffering requires me to notice and make some sort of decision.  I cannot even temporarily ignore the problem when someone is looking directly at me.
On some days, I might only be able to smile back and offer a kind greeting and silent prayer.  But Lord, please never let me look away.
Darcy Wharton

July 7, 2023- Willingness
Our parish is focusing this year on being of service.  Over the years, some of our parishioners have been asked to be a catechist in faith formation or help with liturgy and when asked, they mention that they don’t feel worthy.  In a recent homily, Fr. Bony reminded us that “our willingness is our worthiness”.  I’ve also heard that “God doesn’t call the gifted, He gifts the called”.  Both phrases remind me that if I am willing to offer my life in service, God will provide all the skills and strength needed.  I just need to be open and willing.
In spiritual direction, we often talk about the nudges from God that can be discerned when we pay attention to the invitations placed in our path.  Has someone commented on your voice and suggested you serve as a lector or in the choir?  Has someone invited you to participate in a ministry lately?  It is so comforting to know that God feels we are worthy!
Darcy Wharton

July 8, 2023-Come as You Are
There’s a song that we sing at the 5:00 PM Sunday mass entitled, “Come as You Are” by David Crowder.  It’s a beautiful song that assures us that God accepts us as we are, despite any brokenness we might be feeling and bringing to church with us.
At the recent Women’s Retreat, we spent some time talking about brokenness and I was reminded of the fact that Jesus was broken for us.  Each week as we celebrate Eucharist, I hear that Jesus took the bread, blessed it, broke it, and shared it.  The celebrant doesn’t just say it, but he physically breaks the host into pieces as a visual reminder that brokenness is a necessary part of the spiritual journey as I follow Jesus’ example. 
It is truly countercultural, but it seems that instead of hiding my brokenness, I am encouraged to bring it to God, the ultimate healer. 
Darcy Wharton

July 9, 2023- My Burden is Light
In Matthew’s gospel, Jesus tells his followers that his yoke is easy and his burden is light.  Sometimes I want to say, “really”?  I’m fairly certain that all believers and definitely those in ministry probably have questioned this statement at one time or another.  Being a follower of Christ might mean doing things that are not easy and it might also feel like a bit of a burden.  However, I’ve come to realize that life would be FAR more difficult and burdensome if it weren’t for the presence of God!  I suppose it really is “easy” to follow Jesus rather than try to manage life without Him. 
The interesting thing about yokes is that they allow the load to be evenly distributed, either on the back of one animal or between animals.   They make pulling the load a lot easier, making the animal able to continue working for a much longer period.
Lord, on those days when the load feels heavy, allow me to remember that you are by my side.
Darcy Wharton

Reflections for June 26-July 2, 2023
June 26, 2023 – Presume the Good
At the beginning of his Spiritual Exercises, St. Ignatius gives an instruction called the “Ignatian Presupposition” to both the spiritual director and the retreatant about how they are to relate to one another.  Essentially this presupposition instructs that, unless we have good evidence to the contrary, we should give others the benefit of the doubt – choosing to see their God-given goodness before anything else (“presuming the good”).  It is not an invitation to others to walk all over us or an excuse to ignore evidence of malicious intent.  Nor does it seek to get a person off the hook for responsibility for their actions or the impact of their actions.  At the root of practicing this presupposition is a desire to find common ground. 

I find that for myself, judgement and misunderstanding tend to be at the root of much of my struggles in relationship.  The truth is that I can’t control the intentions or feelings of other people.  Choosing to “presume the good,” allows me to turn inward and control the only thing I can…my own actions.  I can work on what needs attention in my own heart and mind.  In a way, it's sort of like tilling the soil before planting – it’s good to “bring stuff up” that needs to be tended to so that we can grow.  In turn, when I attend to rooting out the thorns and rocks and junk in my soil, the entire garden flourishes as well.  So, by presuming the good and focusing on interior conversion, there is beauty and abundance from which to harvest.
Katie Maynard

June 27, 2023 – The Road Less Traveled

Recently, my cousin recited the poem “The Road Less Traveled” by Robert Frost at my uncle’s funeral mass:
“Two roads diverged in a yellow wood, and sorry I could not travel both…. I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference.”
It turns out this was my uncle’s favorite poem, having framed and hung it in his home.  It struck me as peculiar however, given that my uncle was a simple family man who worked for the railroad – not necessarily what many would imagine to be the “road less traveled.”  You see, I had always interpreted this poem as being about choosing the path which is exciting, unique and one-of-a-kind.  My cousin corrected my interpretation by suggesting that perhaps this poem is more about choosing your path, knowing that no one else can choose it because it is yours.
My uncle loved telling stories, and he loved learning about other people’s stories – I always knew he was listening and that he cared.  He loved his family…especially his grandchildren – doting on them and attending all of their functions.  This a path which many would deem ordinary… but it was extraordinary in the sight of his family and of God. 
Today’s gospel calls us as disciples to enter through the narrow gate which although few choose to traverse, leads to life.  The narrow gate – perhaps it is like the road less traveled – following the path to which only I am called, and it may not be flashy nor will it be easy…but it leads to life.                                                                                                                                     Katie Maynard

June 28, 2023 – Follow Me

I have enjoyed watching my youngest daughter find her passions and interests as she sifts through what stirs within, and what she has observed of her older sisters.  Being the oldest child myself, I have found myself in awe of how quickly she has used her observations to lead her to a decision. 

For example, she has been watching her sisters altar serve for a couple of years now, and when it came time for her to sign up for training she was bursting with excitement!  There was no hesitation, no cajoling or convincing needed – and she has loved every minute.  She asks every week if she can altar serve, and although I know the enthusiasm may abate – there is something in her that has been lit up.  I love watching how she is waiting on baited breath to get the book for Fr. Bony’s prayer, and how she watches the consecration and fraction rite with curiosity and wonder. 

There is something about following and observing that helps discernment be trustworthy…watching, listening so that when I hear the call to “Come Follow Me”, I can be  ready to put down my nets and go .
Katie Maynard

June 29, 2023 – Pillars
Pillars are strong columns made of stone, metal or wood that supports part of a building, but it can also refer to a person or people who are reliable and provide essential support. 
Saints Peter & Paul are foundational pillars of the church: Peter representing its stability and Paul representing its mission of evangelization.  Though they are great saints, they were also ordinary men called to extraordinary vocations.  They responded and God used them in ways they could have never imagined. 

The thing about pillars though, is that you don’t often see one of them holding up a building alone – they are usually accompanied by other pillars to distribute the load.  So it is fitting that our church recognizes these two saints together, because God continues to work through each one of us calling us to be pillars of our faith and our church…but not alone.  We are also reminded of the heavy burden it is to be a pillar, and that others are needed to help so that the load can be shared. 

Today as we celebrate the Feast of SS. Peter & Paul, I invite us all to ponder our own calling in light of theirs…joining ourselves to these two men so that God can continue their holy mission through us in community, balancing the support and sharing the load, because we are stronger together…just like Peter & Paul.
Katie Maynard

June 30 – Rooted
What does it mean to be rooted?  Does it refer to a specific place, a particular city/state, or perhaps to a general landscape?  Is it connected to our familial ties, or where memories were embedded?

When I visit Montana, most of my memories are on the Blackfoot River, in particular at my grandparents’ home.  In fact, my grandmother’s ashes and gravestone lie on their property overlooking the river.  This summer, our trip to Montana was quite different since we were there for a family wedding: our lodging was different, our route of travel was different, and river sports were out of the question, given that the water was high and fast since we were traveling earlier in the summer than usual.

I was surprised that just being in the vicinity of views of the Big Sky and the rolling mountains, the wildflowers along the trails and the river running through it all…I still felt connected.  It was peaceful and grounding and although I could have used a good river float – I realized I will always feel rooted when I return.

It seems to be the same with my faith – that although I may feel connected to a particular church and mass time, my spiritual roots go deeper than place and time.  In our baptism we were anointed priest, prophet and king, so that I am always rooted in the knowledge that I am  a member of his body, sharing everlasting life. 
Katie Maynard

July 1, 2023 – Availability
Just when we think things are on cruise control, life inevitably changes: it takes a twist or a turn, and we are forced to adjust and evolve.  The truth is that we can’t always prepare for change, even though change is inevitable – it’s the one thing we can truly count on in life.  So, how can I move through change without undue suffering? 

Personally, I have a difficult time detaching myself from expected outcomes, and this is what brings about suffering for me in times of change.  In his First Principle and Foundation, St. Ignatius refers to a goal of Ignatian indifference when moving through choices and change.  This indifference is not disinterest or apathy, but availability.   Think about a grandfather clock, balance is not when the pendulum is at the center, but rather when it is swinging in motion.  As long as it swings in moderation, the clock stays true to its purpose and keeps good time.  But if it were to swing excessively to either side, it would lose all balance and become unreliable.

So, somewhere in the steady swinging of the pendulum I recognize the availability that the First Principle and Foundation calls us to.  When I am available, I avoid the suffering associated with attaching myself to ideas of how things should be, or desires for things to remain unchanged.  From this, I can become open to my deepest desire and that leads to God’s deepening His life in me. 
Katie Maynard

July 2, 2023 – Take Up Our Cross
This past month, I led students on a service immersion trip, volunteering at agencies throughout Sacramento from dawn to dusk each day.  On the second to last day of the immersion, we shared a reflection together on today’s gospel reading in which we are called to “take up our cross for whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.” (Mt 10:37-42)  Given our day’s work at River City Food Bank (RCFB) in Midtown, there were many stories that revealed the truth of this paradox. 

RCFB is not your ordinary food bank.  Their goal is to show dignity at every turn: from the ease of the check-in, to the layout of the food as if one were shopping at a local farmer’s market, to the fresh produce and healthful offerings, to the service of walking guests to their car and helping load groceries if they desired. 

We challenged ourselves not to go through the motions, but to make eye contact with the guests, greet them with a smile and to try and discern their needs (which was made difficult with many different language barriers).   When posed the question, “Did you find parts of their lives that you wish for your own?” students shared examples of how the people took care of one another, the generosity and hard work of the other volunteers, how someone stepped in to translate for a stranger, the look of joy on their faces to see the offering of a whole chicken being passed across the counter, to the expressions of gratitude and smiles on the guests’ faces. 

As I listened to the students share these observations I realized that they had experienced the meaning of today’s gospel: by taking up the cross and pouring ourselves out for others, we encounter the risen Christ and find the fullest expression of ourselves.
Katie Maynard

Reflections for June 19-25, 2023

June 19, 2023 – Til Death Do Us Part?
Jeanette was my best friend from the time I was three years old, growing up in Los Angeles.  We went to Catholic school together and practically lived at each other’s houses.  In eighth grade her parents divorced and moved away.  We stayed in touch, but different high schools meant we seldom saw each other.  We married and went our separate ways, exchanging Christmas cards, or occasional phone calls. Then she reappeared into my life…divorced with four children, her oldest daughter having died in a tragic accident.  We had lunch together and then again faded from each other’s lives.  This pattern continued until David and I moved to Northern California.  Jeanette had moved to Sacramento years earlier with her family.  She called again out of the blue and we made plans to meet several times, but something always kept us apart.  Her phone calls have become more frequent lately as her health fades.  When her oldest brother died, I was the first person she called, after her family. This connection is inexplicable.  I do not deserve this kind of loyalty or love from a friend I continually forget to call.  She will soon move to Arizona to live with a son, but upon her death she will be interred in her daughter’s grave, here in Calvary Cemetery.  As we talked I realized that her grave site is only feet from where David and I have purchased a plot.  It seems that in death we will once again share the same physical space.  Why do I take such comfort in that?
Jane Haproff

June 20, 2023 –  Laughter:  the Best Medicine
The morning was beautiful.  The sun shone through the giant oak outside our living room window, a gentle breeze stirred the leaves causing them to shimmer and glimmer in the light as  two morning doves called to each other. Everything about this setting evoked a call to contemplation.  As I settled comfortably into my chair and closed my eyes, I became aware of the construction sounds in the lot that is being developed behind the houses across the street.  Trucks growled and heavy earth moving equipment beeped constantly. I could hear hammers pounding nails and men shouting, all of which distracted me from prayer.  I had experienced what could have been a distraction like this at the women’s retreat a few weeks ago, but I was able to find God, not despite that noise, but actually IN the noise.  I was having no such luck this particular morning, that is until I discerned the sound of men talking and then heard a man’s hearty laugh.  Suddenly God was there.  My restless heart was eased by the sound of laughter and the reminder that God is everywhere and cannot be drowned out by human activity.  I hope I can remember that when the jack hammers start!
Jane Haproff

June 21, 2023 – June 21, 2023 – A Well Ordered World
Doing crossword puzzles and numerical puzzles is one of my favorite pastimes, especially Sudoku puzzles.   I’m not always good at them, but I have discovered that when I stick with it and put that that one number in its proper place then the whole puzzle comes together in a beautiful mathematically satisfying way.  Everything fits the way it is supposed to as all the numbers just fall into place.   I wonder if God hasn’t designed the world to be like that, perfectly ordered and waiting for us to discover that one number.  If the metaphor is to work, that number must be Jesus; finding Him and putting Him in his proper place in our lives makes everything fall into place.  But I get a different message from these puzzles.  Instead, I find myself asking whether Jesus isn’t asking each one of us to be that one number in somebody else’s life?  Stories of perfect strangers doing an act of kindness that changes someone’s life abound.  A few weeks ago Bianca wrote of a woman at Church giving her a check during a dark time; the act itself restored Bianca’s spiritual equilibrium.  What if that is all that is needed to work as co-creators with God in creating a well-ordered world?   The trick I guess is to be ready always to be that person, because I can’t be sure which number or act will complete the puzzle.
Jane Haproff

June 22, 2023  – Help, I’m Shrinking!
In the Wizard of Oz, the Wicked Witch of the West cries out “I'm melting, melting. Ohhhhh, what a world, what a world.” Well I know what she felt like!  I have shrunk 2 and ½ inches.  I know this is normal with aging but it really feels strange.  There are so many changes that occur as one ages; so many ways in which there is less:  energy, hearing, vision, memory, strength, balance.  I have accepted each of these losses as a natural part of life and have taken the spiritual attitude of giving these things back to God from whom they came.  None of this has affected my identity, that is until I realized I really had shrunk.  My clothes don’t fit right, I can’t reach the third shelf in the kitchen, or the hook on the bathroom door.    I don’t recognize myself reflected in windows as I pass.  My mother was 5’3” and I was 5’6”.  This was a set of facts that described the world and my place in it.  Now I am closer to my mother’s height and it has messed with my identity.   As I found myself somewhat shocked and mildly resentful of this, I remembered Plato’s theory that the body gets in the way of the soul’s union with the Good and St. Paul’s advice:  He must increase but I must decrease.  And I have to reckon that there is wisdom here.  As I literally physically decrease, I seem to have more space for an awareness of God’s presence in my life.  So, I’ll forfeit my identity and make space for God to do with me as he will.
Jane Haproff

June 23, 2023 – The Cycle of Life
Reflecting on the stages of my life I realize that life isn’t linear.  It is more like a circle, a closed figure with a curved boundary and discreet, identifiable sectors, each with a purpose.  Childhood is the sector that begins at the top of the circle.  Here I learned to use language, acquired basic skills, and began to forge an identity, becoming my own person.  The arc of the circle moves downward to the next sector where one transitions into the world of new relationships and responsibilities, of building careers and perhaps families. The arc of the third sector begins to move upwards, where mentoring others as they move into their own individual responsibilities occurs, and helping struggling family members maintain their independence.  The fourth sector resembles the first and is directly across from it as the arc moves upward.  Here, like a child, one must learn new skill sets that are versions of ones learned earlier, like how to walk, only differently now, how to listen more carefully, how to get one’s needs met without being a “brat”.  But this sector requires learning an additional skill: letting go of control and perhaps even of one’s independence.  This isn’t a sad thing; instead I believe it is a gift to move up the arc and prepare myself for what awaits me as the circle closes:  complete dependence on and union with the God who gives me life.
Jane Haproff

June 24, 2023 – To Know, Love and Serve God…
The new Catechism of the Catholic Church makes it clear that knowing, loving and serving God is the way to paradise, but also enriches our lives here on earth.  For Catholics, serving God often means being faithful to our own private prayers and devotions.  

I read once that most American Catholics are culturally Protestant; Protestantism being a religion based on individualism: a direct, personal and private connection to God.  Catholicism, on the other hand, is a priestly religion of community; the Mass is a communal prayer that the priest leads in our names and where we are bound together, brothers and sisters in the Christ who we receive in Eucharist.  This communitarian aspect of our Church was nowhere more present than in the celebration of the Mass during Covid.  So many parishioners joined together to make our outdoor Masses possible.  Here, serving God was not private.  It was for the community meeting in His name.  We recently learned that the liturgical celebrations of Holy Week alone required the service of over 300 Eucharistic Ministers, Lectors, ushers, musicians, cleaners, decorators etc.  And these are only the liturgical ministries…there are so many other needs for service in a parish as welcoming and vibrant as SSPP.  So let me extend an invitation:

Dear parishioner, you are cordially invited to an experience that will further enrich your life in ways you cannot now imagine.  Come and serve God by serving your parish community in some way.
Jane Haproff

June 25, 2023 - Eucharist as Connection
Our second son moved to New York for a job when he was twenty-one years old. He was not earning enough to make it home for all the holidays we used to celebrate together so for Thanksgiving I made a pumpkin pie and sent it express mail to him. He shared it with a friend’s family who hosted an “orphan’s Thanksgiving” each year.  I felt somehow connected to him, knowing that he was sharing the pie I had made with another family that holiday.  Years later I sent a birthday cake, some candles, birthday napkins, and a can of nuts to his place of business.  I called it “birthday-in-a box” and his colleagues loved it.  As his birthday approached the following year they asked if he was going to get a cake again.  Stephen doesn’t really like cake, but he requests this as his birthday gift each year.  This has now become a tradition, this sharing of a homemade cake uniting us over time and great distance.  Every year we send the cake and feel connected to Stephen in a way that is difficult to explain.

As we put the cake in the mail this week, (express priority!) I thought about Eucharist and what the Father has done for me…sending His Son as food to be shared in a community meal that connects us to Him in a way that is difficult to explain but binds us all together with Him over time and great distance.  And I am filled with renewed awe and gratitude.
Jane Haproff

Reflections for June 12-18, 2023

June 12, 2023—Making Memories
Father Brendan McGuire, who led our parish retreat in January, stressed the importance of “making memories.”  These are moments that can sustain us when we are no longer able to able to travel or do the things we could do when we are younger.

Cindy and I spent the month of May in Italy and Portugal.  It was my first trip to both countries and Cindy’s second.  This was athe trip of a lifetime and it created many memories, some of which I’m sharing in my reflections this week.  We returned home wanting more.

We experienced wonderful people who were warm, welcoming and friendly.  Some turned out to be hidden angels.  The food was delicious, and we had our share of pasta and risotto in Italy and great fish in Portugal (even though I think I found the best risotto in Portugal!).  The weather was generally good.  Each church we saw seemed grander than the one before it. (During our trip, we visited three of the largest churches in the world).  And our experiences of history and culture did not leave us disappointed.  But more than all these, my best memory was sharing it with Cindy.

Leading up to our trip, we had doubts that 30 days was too long a trip.  We both have some aches and pains, and my allergies flared up several times during our trip.  But we knew it was important to “make memories”, especially as they reflected our shared faith.  And we are so grateful that we did!
Bob Leathers

June 13, 2023—The Last Supper
Cindy and I began our European trip in Milan, Italy.  One of the highlights was seeing The Last Supper, painted by Leonardo di Vinci.  Tickets are sold with timed entries and limited to 25 visitors.  It’s nearly impossible to get one.  I could have spent several hours observing this painting, but they only allow you access for 15 minutes.

In di Vinci’s The Last Supper, I imagined that Jesus just said, “One of you is about to betray me.”  While Jesus remains calmly in the middle of his cohort, his disciples remained anything but calm.  They are pointing fingers and discussing (or more likely arguing) in groups of three who the betrayer was.

Jesus was present both in his person and in the meal they shared.  One would think they should be at peace, but they were not.  Then I thought of the times I’ve received Jesus in the Eucharist, only to return to my seat in the pews—but not always at peace because I think about the challenges ahead of me that day or that week.

Jesus never abandoned his apostles.  The Last Supper reminded me that Jesus doesn’t abandon us either.
Bob Leathers

June 14, 2023—Passport Hidden Angels
Cindy and I spent the second half of our European trip in Portugal.  One of the stops along the way was the small, but historic town of Obidos, near the Atlantic Ocean.  After spending a few hours there, we left for a group lunch on a working farm and a tour of a cork factory.  (We learned that Portugal provides most of the world’s cork stoppers found in wine bottles).   Prior to arriving at the cork factory, I realized I didn’t have my passport with me.  Cindy mentioned it to our Tour Director, Joana.  I last presented my passport to make a purchase in Obidos and thought I had secured it in my backpack.

I think Joana must be an angel because she already knew someone’s passport was missing.  She had received a call from the security guard in Obidos that they found an American passport.  Unfortunately, they gave her my middle and first name, so Joana did not initially make the connection.  Once we figured this out, another angel, a manager from the nearby hotel where we spent the night, retrieved the passport and brought it to the hotel in Lisbon where we would be staying. 

But there was a third angel involved.  This is the angel who found my passport and turned it into the security guard in Obidos.

I never met two of the three angels involved.  While I couldn’t see them, I know they were there.
Bob Leathers

June 15, 2023—These Bones Will Shout
In our travels throughout Italy and Portugal, I was struck by how much the dead were honored.

In Florence, Italy, for example, visitors to the Basilica of the Holy Cross, the largest Franciscan church in the world, can pay their respects to Michelangelo, Galileo, and Dante, among others.

In Evora, Portugal, east of Lisbon, one can visit The Chapel of Bones.  This chapel is part of the larger Royal Church of St. Francis, constructed by Franciscan monks in the late 16th century.

By the 16^th century , there were as many as 43 cemeteries near Evora taking up valuable land, so the monks decided to build the Chapel and relocate the bones.  The monks were concerned about society’s values andthought it best to put the bones on display, which they did.  In the early 1600s, Evora was noted for its wealth and monks thought the Chapel would be a good place to meditate on the short-term nature of material things in the presence of death.  Visitors can read this message above the Chapel door: “We bones are here, waiting for yours.”

In the breadth of eternity, our time on earth is short.  My tour of Italy and Portugal were reminders of this reality and the profound honor given to those who have gone before us, the great and even the not-so-great.  May their memories be eternal.
Bob Leathers

June 16, 2023—The Bones of St. Peter
Cindy and I were privileged to obtain tickets for the Scavi tour at the Vatican.  It is the hottest ticket in town and limited to about 250 persons a day in groups of about 15. 

The Scavi tour takes place in an area under the Basilica of St. Peter at the Vatican.  Christian tradition has always held that St. Peter was crucified upside down by Emperor Nero and buried on Vatican Hill. Shortly before World War II, Pope Pius XII initiated a highly secret project to find St. Peter’s remains.  Funded anonymously by a wealthy American, a small army of Vatican workers began the excavations.  The excavators unearthed many early Christian graves, crypts and artifacts.  To keep it secret, all the excavation work was done by Vatican workers using only hand tools (to minimize noise).  At one point, St. Peter’s bones were thought to be found and were kept for a decade in Pope Pius’ apartment—until further research showed these were not his remains.

This was an incredible story of what turned out to be a 75-year search.  Along the way, it pitted one of the 20^th centuries most talented archaeologists, a woman, against top Vatican insiders.  Cindy and I were incredibly blessed to take the tour and see St. Peter’s bone fragments.  Most visible was his jaw.  Why his jaw?  Could it be that while Peter denied Christ three times, he also proclaimed his great love for him three times, ultimately giving his life for him?
Bob Leathers

June 17, 2023—Fatima
Following our group tour, Cindy and I did a day long visit to Fatima, about an 1½ hour drive from Lisbon. On the feast day of Our Lady of Fatima, May 13^th, upwards of 1,000,000 people gather in the plaza.  We visited on a somewhat rainy May 23^rd, so the crowds were down. This was a blessing for us!

We arrived in Fatima just in time to attend mass (in Portuguese) in the Basilica of the Holy Trinity.  This modernistic basilica, which opened in 2007, is the 9^th largest church in the world with a capacity of 9,000 seats.  Inside, I felt like I was bathed in bright light.  What was most striking is the mosaic that stretches from one end of the sanctuary to the other, depicting the transcendence of God in the Trinity. 

The older and much smaller Basilica of the Holy Rosary is on the other end of the plaza.  The three shepherd children are buried there.  Since there was no mass taking place, we had quiet time for personal prayer and a rosary.

We were also blessed to see the little house in the plaza that marks the site of the first apparition on May 13, 1917, the house where Jacinta and Francisco grew up, and the site where Michael the Archangel instructed the children on the Eucharist.

I found Fatima to be a place of great peace and came away with a renewed relationship with Mary, and a reminder to pray always, especially the Rosary.
Bob Leathers

June 18, 2023—Churches and Saints
During our trip to Europe, we saw some beautiful churches including three of the largest churches in the world: St. Peter’s Basilica (#1), the Duomo (Cathedral) of Milan (#3), and the Basilica of the Holy Trinity (Fatima) (#9).  We also saw St. Mark’s Basilica in Venice where the author of Mark’s gospel is buried.

You need tickets to visit some of these churches.  The lines to enter St. Peter’s, the Duomo in Milan, and St. Mark’s Basilica seemed to stretch for miles.  While I’m exaggerating just a bit, it was inspiring to see these lines.

In Evora and Lisbon, crews were preparing in May for the feast day of John the Baptist (June 24th) and the feast day of St. Anthony (June 13^th), respectively.  While there is much celebrating, the people of these cities don’t forget their patron saints.

Witnessing these lines and preparations gave me pause to reflect on why many churches in the U.S. (and elsewhere) lack the same experience of the fervor we witnessed at these places in Europe.  After all, Christ is present in the Eucharist in all the masses celebrated each day throughout the world.

Here in our own parish of SS Peter & Paul, we are blessed to have joyful liturgies, yet sometimes our masses are not full.  I wonder what more we can do.  Wouldn’t it be great if every Sunday mass were like an Easter Sunday mass—filled to the brim?
Bob Leathers

Reflections for June 5-11, 2023
All Gave Some, Some Gave All
When I first heard the phrase, “all gave some, some gave all”, it made me ponder:  what am I giving?  Am I giving my all?  As I reflect on the meaning of the Memorial Day just past, I think of my rich family heritage of men who have served in the Army, Marines, and the Navy.  I am filled with a sense of patriotic pride for their selfless giving.  Though I never served in the military, I am in awe of the service these men and women have given to protect freedoms I take for granted.  I liken it to my kids taking for granted the sacrifices that I choose to make to help them be successful or when I give them things that I think would be beneficial.  I think that we can’t know the exact sacrifices our service men and women have made unless we live it.    
I pray for all our military, their families and loved ones.  I pray especially for our veterans who have been injured physically and mentally during their time of service.  May God heal them body, mind, and soul and instill upon them peace and tranquility knowing they gave all they had.                                                      Bianca Hennager

June 6, 2023 - The Goal in Life
I read this quote by Tim Keller that said, “The goal in life is not to live forever. But to create something that will.”  It is such a powerful thought to recognize and accept our own mortality.  Everywhere we turn there are products to make us look/feel youthful and ways to stop the aging process.  It made me think about what I am trying to chase.  Am I taking the time to create something that will last a lifetime or chasing the dream of wanting to live forever?  When I think about what it means to create something that will last a lifetime, I am reminded of my times of service, when I served a person or a community in need.  I am also reminded of moments that made a lasting impact on my life.  There might not be any pictures to recount the specific day or a clock to remember the time, but it is the feeling, the memory  itself, that stays with me.  One memory that has stayed with me was of serving a meal at the local homeless shelter when I was in high school. A teenage boy with his family came through the buffet line. I recognized him and remembered he went to the same elementary school that I did.  We weren’t close but he recognized me, as I recognized him.  After serving I sat down at his table and made light conversation.  I don’t know how he felt about the interaction, but it is one that has made a lasting impression on me. 
Lord, let my goal in life be to create something meaningful with the gifts you have given me.  Let my will be your will and let me be in service to my neighbor whatever the need.                                                          Bianca Hennager

June 7, 2023 - “Dying to Self”
I went to a Catholic high school and my sophomore year of school we studied the Gospels and Letters from Paul.  My religion teacher was newly married and had a great passion not only for the faith but a true love of Scripture.  She used the phrase “dying to self” as what Paul mentioned in his letters when discussing what a spiritual conversion looks like.  The image of dying to self stuck with me as it was hard for my brain to comprehend its meaning during that formative time.  However, over the years the “dying to self” mantra has taken on new forms in my life.  It still is centered around giving up my selfish desires and wants and thinking of others around me; however, now as a wife and mother it is in the everyday grind of making conscious decisions to die to self in the smallest of ways.  It can be willing to have loud teenage girls over when all I want is some quiet or spending the evening being a chauffeur for my son who doesn’t have his license yet, but still has many responsibilities that take him away from home.  I can choose to offer up these moments as a small way to die to myself and experience truly the meaning of being Christ-like especially to my family who I often take for granted. 
Lord in these moments when I want to be selfish help me to transform my thoughts and focus on being more Christ-like and centered on you.                                                                                                                  Bianca Hennager

June 8, 2023 - The Golden Egg
Each of our children have had a little family nickname as we prepared for their birth.  Our youngest son’s nickname while we awaited his arrival was fondly “the golden egg”.  We didn’t know who or what he would be like, but he came into our lives at a critical time.  When we found out we were expecting him, my husband had recently lost his job.  With 3 small children ages 7 and under this was quite a stressful time for our family.  I had not returned to working full time and worried what the future would look like.  I trusted that through this child, things would work out.  As I entered into my third trimester, I started to lose hope that things would work out.  I remember going to Church and praying for a sign that all would be well.  One day while at Church, a friend from a Mom’s group was at Church and saw me.  She knew my present struggle and could see I was upset.  She was so kind not only to offer words of encouragement, but also to offer a  check to help us during this difficult time.  It was just the sign that I needed to know that God was with me and not to lose hope.  The next week my husband got a job offer and began his new job two weeks before I had “our golden egg.”   I never cashed that check and months later I sent her a thank you card and the check telling her that her words and willingness to assist during one of my most difficult times was all I needed.  Her act of service was the face of Christ made present during a stressful time for me.          Bianca Hennager

June 9, 2023 - I Call You by Name
When I came home from college I began volunteering as a young adult in the Church. I wanted to create a local young adult ministry at my local church.  At the time there was a new program called “Theology on Tap.”  It was a great event for young adult Catholics to meet up in a centralized place and have food and beverage as well as speakers on faith topics relevant to our age group.  As I was leading this initiative, I needed lots of volunteers to help make the program a success.  I had the opportunity to speak after one of the Masses and explained to the congregation the help that I needed.  I didn’t get a huge response and felt somewhat deflated.  The following week at Church I saw a young man close to my age and went up to him after Mass.  I introduced myself and said you are just the person I need to help with Theology on Tap.  At first, he was a little shocked at my bluntness but then when I explained what the program was, he seemed a little more curious about it.  He attended one of the first planning meetings and made a commitment to help.  Later he told me that he probably would not have volunteered without me personally inviting him and finding a way to have him be a part of our planning community.  It made me realize the power of personal invitation and how Christ calls us each by name.         
Bianca Hennager

June 10, 2023 -  Best Christmas Ever
Over the years I have experienced various Christmases but one in particular stands out as “the best.”  My love language is acts of service and giving gifts, so Christmas time is always a special time of year as we typically give gifts and do acts of service for others during this season.  Truthfully, we should be doing acts of service all year round, but there is something about “the Christmas spirit”.  My husband asked me what I wanted for Christmas, and I told him I wanted to go serve on Christmas day.  He seemed a bit bewildered but agreed to go with me and help me by managing the kids.  I thought the kids would be a lot more vocal about having to wake up early, skip opening their presents to go to a strange place and serve people they did not know.  Surprisingly, the kids were of good cheer and went without trouble.   We went to Cesar Chavez Park on Christmas morning and passed out breakfast burritos, hot chocolate and coffee, and clothing to anyone who needed it.  Seeing my kids helping and being of good cheer made the experience that much more memorable.  We came back around noon and began opening up our presents.  I was so content watching everyone with their happy attitudes that it made that day the most perfect day and Christmas yet.  I fondly look back at that time remembering how blessed a day it was.                                      Bianca Hennager

June 11, 2023 - One Bread One Body
As I reflect on today’s readings I am reminded about the Body of Christ and how we all participate in receiving Christ in the Eucharist using one bread.  I am reminded of the lyrics of “One Bread One Body”: One bread one body, one Lord of all.  One cup of blessings which we bless, and we, though many, throughout the earth we are one body in this one Lord…. many the gifts, many the works…  It reminds me that we all have different gifts and the way that we show up for the Eucharistic feast can be different depending on where we come from and how we are formed.  The important thing though is that we show up and actively participate in the Eucharistic feast. When I think about how my husband and I participate in the Eucharistic feast I realize that it is often different.  Sure, we go to Mass regularly, but he is quieter and more contemplative. I am usually belting out the songs and doing my best to remain reverent in those quieter more contemplative moments.  Both ways are participating in the Eucharistic feast but doing it differently; neither is better or worse just different.   
Lord as we prepare our hearts and minds to participate in this Eucharistic feast, let us know that all are welcome despite our differences, and we all have a place at your table.                                                          Bianca Hennager

May 29, 2023 - Angels
Have you thanked your guardian angel lately? We have been studying the rolesof God’s angels in my bible study group recently. It has been a great reminder of how angels are working in our lives.

For example, one my favorite pieces of art depicts a health care team diligently working on a patient, trying to save his life. In the messy chaos, you see in the background angels surrounding them. They are unseen by those in the trauma room, but the artist makes it clear that they are present. The first time I saw this painting, it took my breath away! The thought of an angel standing behind me, delivering God’s power, grace, and guidance, brings me so much comfort. My hope is that all believers can remember this resource, especially in times of danger or fear.

CCC 336 reminds Catholics that “beside every believer stands an angel as protector and shepherd leasing him to life.” Angels are a resource that I need to remember I have, especially in times of anxiety.
Jen Payan

May 30, 2023 - Acts of Service
Our parish council has designated this year as “a year of service.” We are being asked to reflect on how we can be of service, not only to our parish, but to our community and the environment. I immediately questioned my own service commitments.  What am I currently doing, how can I do more? Honestly, this prospect can be anxiety provoking. I question myself: What am I good at? What do I have time for? Am I doing enough?

After contemplating all of this, I felt the Holy Spirit nudging me to ask a different question - What is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me? The answer may be one of the best ways I can be of service to others since the things I recalled were surprisingly small gestures that felt like huge acts of service that others were bestowing on me. One time a co-worker went out and got a hamburger for me when they got off shift, knowing I was staying overtime and hadn’t brought dinner. Another time a stranger carried my baby to the car when my other daughter broke her arm at the playground. These examples make me realize that there are simple things I can do to be of service to others, and that however small they can make a great impact.
Jen Payan

May 31, 2023 - Behind the Scenes
When reflecting on service roles within our church community, I couldn’t help but think of the diverse group of ladies that I spend every Thursday morning in Bible Study with. Each one is making our church community what it is with their lovely acts of service. I don’t think that most parishioner even realize what goes on behind the scenes in liturgy, faith formation, and the events in our parish.  There are the Catechists, who spend many hours preparing lessons for the youth. Some teach the little ones, while others lead groups of teens. Some work with young adults and those preparing for marriage, while others support married couples. Then there are those  who are back in the kitchen preparing food for funeral receptions and the Gathering Inn twice a month. They do the food shopping and planning and organize groups to assist. While some of them are ministry leaders, others do a quiet, simple function that assures that things are clean and run smoothly. For example, one stocks all the first aid kits in every classroom while another vacuums and cleans the church weekly.  They all give of their time and skills with love and compassion. I’m so fortunate to be surrounded with people who take the gospel to heart and mimic Christ in the best way they know how.
Jen Payan

June 1, 2023 - Essential Workers
How often do we stop to recognize those who are essential in our work or home life? Years ago, I attended a lecture by an air force trauma surgeon who had had multiple deployments to Iraq and Afghanistan. His audience was made up of mostly doctors and nurses who wanted to understand the lifesaving treatments of our soldiers and civilians caught in the crossfire. We marveled at some of the amazing stories of the rapid treatment, surgery, and care of the patients by the medical team. But then he started explaining the roles of the entire team at the field hospital. He mentioned that the CT scanners were constantly breaking down because of the sand and weather. The team that kept them maintained made it possible to run quick diagnostics. Then there was the clean-up team that could turn over an operating room so quickly that lives were saved because of them. Now when I look around at the hospital where I work, I’m always sure to thank a housekeeper, who cleans up a spill quickly so I can focus on my patient. Or the security guard who clears a hallway so we can rush someone to surgery. The reality is that we are performing our lifesaving tasks with an entire team of people working behind the scenes. Jesus’ message in the gospels asks that we recognize everyone as having value and worth. By recognizing the many who work behind the scenes, we can apply this principle.  I remind myself that It is important to stop, look around, and acknowledge all of those whose service is unseen.
Jen Payan

June 2, 2023 - End of the School Year Blues
As the prom and graduation pictures streamed by on social media these last few weeks, I’ve been reflecting on the challenge of transitions in family life. Each year we find our children moving from one milestone to the next, whether going from kindergarten to first grade or leaving home to attend college. The past year by now has become a routine and a comfortable rhythm.  I have finally figured out the minimum day schedule and navigating the pick-up lane has become effortless.  Right when I have it down, there is a flurry of end of school year activities, and it is over. As it comes to a close, I start anticipating the next year to come, contemplating the new schedules and transitioning to new classrooms and sometimes new schools. It seems as if we will never get off the hamster wheel!

Our family life and routine are forever in flux. We are constantly readjusting as our children grow. When this seems overwhelming, I try to focus on the constants in our family life. Maybe it is an annual vacation or a family tradition. Maybe it is church every Sunday or family dinners. These are the things my children seem to remember better that anything from their childhoods. So when family life too gets too hectic, I go back to remembering the constants:  tradition, faith, and love.
Jen Payan

June 3, 2023 - Bouncing Back
The last few years have presented some huge challenges for a few of my children. One daughter tore her ACL doing track in college, putting her out for the season.  Recently my son broke his foot, side lining him for most of the track season. Watching both work through the disappoint and pain of their injuries was heartbreaking. It was so hard to know what to say and how to comfort them. I know from experience that hardships such as these are truly what build character and resilience. They prepare you for future adversity. How you respond sets the stage for behavior in the future. But seriously, who wants to hear that, especially from your mother, in the middle of such misery? They just want comfort and empathy.

Reflecting on this situation with my children gives me a better understanding of how God works. He wants us to learn and grow from hardships. Most importantly, he wants us to come to him when we are hurting.  What I want for my children, God definitely wants for me.
Jen Payan

June 4, 2023  - Graduation Season
As both my daughters graduate from college this year, I’ve been transitioning into a new parenting role.  Parenting is shifting from caregiver to one of support, advising and listening. But most importantly, waiting until they ask for advice, rather than volunteering it. I’m making every effort to let them navigate the world on their own, allowing for mistakes and freedom. And this is excruciating! During this graduation season, I’m trying  to remember to “let go and let God” when it comes to our adult offspring. After all, our children are God’s children first and he will hold them in his care. I have put the work in and it is time to let them fly. So when my FaceTime rings, I need to pick up, smile, and start listening instead of instructing.  I bet they will call much more often!
Jen Payan

Reflections for May 22-29, 2023

May 22, 2023 – Bum Rap
Seems that nuns always get the bum rap (excuse the pun) whenever Catholic adults get together and talk about their Catholic School days.  Somehow nuns always become associated with whacks on the backs of hands with rulers.  I have a different story to tell.  One in which I think the world of those devoted women with love, respect, conviction, and who have the ability to impart a well-rounded education to students.  To this day, I am reminded constantly of the wonders of our church and our world as taught through the eyes of these enlightened women.
At the age of ten, my family moved from upper Minnesota to Santa Cruz, California.  Uprooted though I was in the middle of a school year, I kept grounded in my education by the basic teachings of my Minnesota nuns.   They wrote letters to me encouraging acceptance of my new teachers, my new classmates, and the wonders of my new surroundings.  Many of these letters I enjoy reading to this day.  Here’s why, and what one of my Sisters wrote:  
“When you miss us, you can always find me by just going to the nearest church.  There is Jesus, and he’s here too.  If you’d like to talk to me, just whisper it to him and he’ll let me know.  Our heavenly traffic will make a rainbow over the Rockies passing through the Heart of God on its way over.”  /s/ Sr. Margaret Mary.
That image of the rainbow of prayer and the love behind it, has never left me.
Don Eagle

May 23, 2023 – Participation Equals Satisfaction
About a month ago, Deacon David gave a homily wherein he focused on SS. Peter & Paul’s 2023 Year of Service.  Our parishioners have taken this challenge to heart and are involved in a wide and varied number of ministries. As far back as I can remember, SS Peter & Paul has always been a living, breathing community of people dedicated to the carrying out of God’s admonition to love one another. 
I have noticed that people who participate in any of the ministries offered become more satisfied in their beliefs, and stronger in their commitment to their religion. Just think of the Lectors who proclaim, the musicians who stir our souls with music, RCIA, Boy Scouts, environment workers, cleaners, and on and on.  Participation equals satisfaction.
We are told in the New Testament that we are given many gifts by the Holy Spirit; that my individual gifts can (and should) be developed.   We are also told that the body is made up of many parts, all inter-dependent.  I believe that the many parts of SS Peter & Paul do indeed constitute the living body of Christ, and that all who participate do in fact walk with Him.
I remind myself:  participation equals satisfaction.
Don Eagle

May 24, 2023 – Listening
Listening is a theme throughout the Bible, and more often than not, it refers to those who don’t listen, or more accurately, those who do not listen with the heart. I find myself not listening, or listening but not really getting the drift of the meaning behind what is being said. Prophets repeatedly reminded us that we’re not listening.  We seem to be attuned to either not listening or tolerating things to just pass through.  In today’s super-fast communications world, our minds listen to a myriad of messages, and very quickly zip through them.  If our Homilist dealt with a subject this week, would that be recalled one week later?  
Not long ago, we celebrated Pentecost.  We’ve heard the story, we’ve read the gospel, we’re familiar with the general message, we wear red, but what does it really mean?  What did God really give me that day?  Why is it 50 days after Easter?  
Similarly, I hear or read of the Ascension.  What really happened, other than Jesus ascending into the heavens?  What was the real message here?  Perhaps it was the message of the angels to the apostles to begin their ministry (“Why do you stand about?”) Or perhaps it was the admonition that Jesus would send the Holy Spirit to be with us always.  
Sometimes it pays to read between the lines.  And I remind myself: that always, it pays to listen to the message with an open mind and an open heart.
Don Eagle

May 25, 2023 - Water
I suppose that at one time or another I’ve likened life to a series of stepping stones.  Lake Itasca in upper Minnesota is the birthplace of the mighty Mississippi River.  Here you can skip across the river on a series of stones.  At its terminus, though, the river is two miles wide.  Crossing the river in Lake Itasca reminds me of life itself, of the never-ending life of water, and almost of eternity itself.   In life I am confronted with a series of stepping stones.  To get from birth to death I go from the safety of steps that involve learning, to wider circumstances such as teaching, graduation, marriage, children, jobs, and retirement.  Faith swirls around those steps, embraces them, rushes around them, and flows much like water from a beginning to an ultimate sea, and, through thousands of years completes a circle in which new steps are formed.  
Water is a key symbol in our Christian lives.  Through baptism, I become a child of God, for it washes away sin.  Washing feet becomes symbolic of service, walking on water, catching fish, changing water into wine, and so on, all depict the importance of water and each reminds me of a deeper reality and its never-ending use throughout history. 
Don Eagle

May 26, 2023 - Finding God in the Navy.
At the tender age of twenty and filled with the curiosity of youth, I decided to join the Navy, to sort things out, explore directions, and hopefully, to see the world.  Luckily, I was assigned to a ship on the east coast, and immediately set out on a cruise to Rio de Janiero, Brazil.  For the next two years I visited countries in Europe, Africa and Asia.  The sights and sounds witnessed in those two years were special to me.  But what I remember with clarity were the sights and sounds of the sea itself; of the spirituality of a sunset at sea, of the immensity of the power of a storm, or of seeing a rain squall miles away.  Alone in the middle of the Atlantic, you are witness to both faith and hope as your ship is tossed about.  As waves are tossed over the ship, and the deck slips beneath your feet, you experience trust.  As the calmness of a tranquil sea at morning instills in you an inner peace, and the awesomeness of a rainbow or the beauty of a sunset gives you a lift like no other, a bursting forth of an appreciation of what God is all about, and how you can find him anywhere.  
Though we didn’t have a priest on board, we did have a group of dedicated officers and enlisted men who gathered every Sunday for a reading and a rosary. I learned to listen, I learned to help, I learned that I was not alone in my beliefs. I found out where God was and is.  He is in the morning sun, the storm at sea, the blush of a rose and the whole of humanity.
Don Eagle

May 27, 2023, - The True Church
I have done some traveling in my career, and usually made it a point to visit cathedrals, basilicas and just plain parish churches.  Each has been unique, from the grandeur of St. Peters in Rome, the Campostella in Spain, or to the somewhat restored Sao Domingos in Lisbon.  From St. Patrick’s in New York to St. Mary’s Cathedral in San Francisco.  Cardinal Bernardin’s hat floats above the sanctuary in Chicago, while a carved whale’s tail becomes the ambo in Mendocino.  Each church has been unique, architecturally interesting, and a destination unto itself.  
But the church itself can be more easily found in the local churches themselves.  St. Peter and Paul’s here in Rocklin is where I find the true church.  The crowded church on weekends, the vibrant programs, the special people, these all make up the living church:  comfortable, contemplative, and being a true shepherd to the needs of its congregation family.  We are a young, growing church that reaches out through many ministries, to heal, to feed, to be baptized, learn, to grow, and to die.  It is really rewarding to be a part of it.  
Recognizing God in cathedrals and basilicas can be awesome, a salute to the abilities of man to build beauty.  Recognizing God in local churches can be even more awesome, for it is there we approach the Divine through his people.
Don Eagle

May 28, 2023 - Pentecost
Pentecost signals the end of the Lenten season.   It is considered to be the second most important ecclesiastical holy day of the year after Easter.  It was on this day, 50 days after the Resurrection that Jesus told the apostles that he would leave them, but the Holy Spirit, the Breath of God, would be coming to them and would be with them always.  In Acts 2:4 we read that “They were all filled with the Holy Spirit and began to speak in other tongues, as the Spirit gave them utterance.
We were each sealed at our Confirmation, and were anointed with oil and “sealed” with the Holy Spirit, meaning that we belong to God.  We have answered his call and said to him: “Here I am Lord, send me.  And through the Holy Spirit, he has responded with “Here I am, standing right beside you, do not be afraid.”
It is the fire of the Holy Spirit within us that we project the risen Jesus, and that we ask Him to descend upon each of us, enlightening, thrilling, and healing.  
Two symbols of the Holy Spirit are wind and fire.  Both quietly invading our souls to drive us onward.
Though I’ve said it before, I’d say it again: “Without a breeze or wind, a sailboat on San Francisco Bay simply sits in the water.  But a wind will fill its sails, get it going, move the boat to its destination.  We are like that sailboat sitting in the water until the breath of God fills our sails and motivates us onward.  
Don Eagle

Reflections for May 15-21, 2023

May 15, 2023 - Possibility for Joy
“He is a reminder that even on the worst days, there is a possibility for joy” was just dialogue on a TV show.  But while recovering at home from an illness, I heard that dialogue on Holy Thursday at 6:58 PM, just as the SS Peter and Paul service would be starting.  The timing brought to mind service and sacrifice, the spiritual theme of the day.

In my lifetime I have been of service in many ways.  My jobs, my elderly neighbors, my parish involvement, my graduate school free time, etc.  There have been good days and bad days.  I have mentioned before the few days I spent serving at a Red Cross shelter during the Paradise Fire.  In the same day that I provided basic services to a number of evacuees I also relayed the current fire position to a guest which suggested that their home was now gone.  During my career, medical circumstances necessitated delivery of a premature and nderweight infant during my shift. An hour later during a pause in activity, I called my eldest to wish him a Happy Birthday, remembering his size at birth was several times that of the premie.   In those circumstances and at this moment, Jesus is a reminder that even on the worst days, there is a possibility for joy, if I have faith; if I recognize and embrace that the service Jesus demonstrates at the Last Supper really does show us the path to new life. 
Ray Frink

May 16, 2023 - Water Polo Moment
During my teenage years, I played water polo.   I still enjoy watching the sport and my beloved goddaughter played it in college.  A great deal of contact, most of it against the rules, occurs under water out of the sight of the referees. This is an accepted part of the game for the players; however, I wonder if this is just another example of the end justifying the means.  We see examples of this attitude in sport frequently.  We see it in politics, personal and societal decisions, and even in choices in our faith. 

From the time of St Augustine to the present, the Catholic Church has said that the end does not justify the means.  “We can never do something wrong or evil in order to bring about a good. This is the meaning of the saying, "the end does not justify the means" (Catechism of the Catholic Church, nos. 1749-1761).”  Just like in water polo, I have made decisions in my life, where caught up in the moment, due to fear of not being accepted, societal pressure, fear of missing out, or ignorance, I have made choices in which I acted with the end justifying the means.  I succumbed to the temptation to figuratively play under water where my actions could not be seen.  
Now,  in that moment of temptation I pause before acting, when that little voice in my head says wait, I try asking myself if this is a water polo moment.          
Ray Frink

May 17, 2023 - Part of the Plan
          My wife and I are planners.  Over the years she and I have assumed a number of roles.  In school, sport activities, or faith responsibilities where she or I were needed for ideas, meetings, delegation, and execution, we were there.    What caused me to think along these lines was a movie quote:  “The plan doesn’t make us great, what we have together, that’s what makes us great. “  I think this is true of any act of service done through love and faith.   My wife and I may not always be on the same committee, or involved in the same activity at the same time.  She may be in charge or I may be.  It makes no difference.  The plan is not what makes an act of service. It is the people and what they share.

Paul, the other authors of the epistles, and the authors of the gospels understood this.  Every word of the New Testament was spoken for a reason and to a particular group who needed to hear God’s word.  Jesus explained and taught us God’s plan. Jesus completes God’s plan begun in the Old Testament, making it clear in two simple instructions:  love God and love neighbor.  Whether it is the love in a couple or family, the love within the Body of Christ, or the unfathomable love of God for his people, it is “what we have together, that’s what makes us great. “
Ray Frink

May 18, 2023 - Just Do It
Beginning as a child, I have believed that I would never be given a task that God had not prepared me to do.  Even at moments of greatest doubt, in the back of my mind that belief holds.  I will figure out a way. 
A parable we are familiar with is the feeding of the 5000 by the multiplication of the loaves and fishes.  There are many discussions of the meaning of this event: a shared experience, the feeding of people in a wilderness, reference to the Old Testament, etc.  I thought about what Jesus speaks first:  Jesus says, “Give them something to eat yourselves.”  He instructs the apostles to do something themselves.  Jesus is telling me to act.  Shortly after this miraculous feeding, the gospels continue with Peter attempting to walk on water and Jesus is there to save Peter. 
For me these go together.  When confronted with the needs of many, I am part of the first responders to those needs.  Jesus does not ask the 5000 if they are believers, followers, or just curious about Him.   Jesus is there to feed the hungry and He asks that I be part of that.  He also is there to extend his reassuring hand, if my faith faulters.

I don’t always remember how God has built me.  I focus on my inadequacies instead of my strengths.  I hope that little voice in the back of my mind never fails to be there when I need it most.   
Ray Frink

May 19, 2023 - The Fight
This is a year of service at our parish.  I am a retired doctor and researcher.  Friends and family call and ask advice on medical concerns and I offer the most knowledgeable insight I can.   On occasion even strangers who hear I am a doctor have questions.  I wondered why I still readily answer these calls instead of declining.  I realized that I miss the fight.  I miss the late nights as the last line of care.  I miss the challenge to make the right diagnosis and select the best treatment.  I miss the opportunity after surgery to tell a family everything is going to be all right with their loved one.   And it goes beyond my career. I miss the fight, the struggle, the challenge, the puzzle, deciphering the unknown, call it what you will.  And because I know that whatever good I do flows from God, I know it's okay to want to stay in the fight.  And God wants me to stay in the fight. 

Through the Holy Spirit I am called to service and to stay in the fight.  It makes no difference what my parish role is.  The effort can take many forms, but the end point is always to bring me closer to God, His creation, and the Body of Christ.  The Covid years put me into a spiritual sleep.  Ephesians 5:14 answers: “Therefore, it says: “Awake, O sleeper, and arise from the dead, and Christ will give you light.”  I am awake.
Ray Frink

May 20, 2023 - Thoughts
I recently read an article in which the speaker referred to a new member of a board of directors as “a great thought partner” going forward.   My first reaction was how great a “thought partner” my wife is for me and one of the many reasons I love her.  After mentioning this to my wife, true to form, she asked if God is a thought partner for me?

Over the years, I have heard and learned many images for God:  father, faithful lover, a person of limitless mercy, good shepherd, king, creator.   I ask myself how seriously I have considered God the Father “a thought partner”; someone that I can share ideas with and expect a response.  This is an attribute that I more easily ascribe to Jesus, but why not the Father also?  The apostles and early disciples had the opportunity to speak directly with Jesus and he was a “thought partner” extraordinaire for them.   The difficult part for me is that deep down I don’t expect a response.  I say I do, but I wonder if that is true.

One of the regular reflectors on the Laudate app often ends his thoughts with the question, “Lord, what are we going to do today?”   If I begin each day asking the Father what we are going to do today, then this is a first step to acknowledging that the best “thought partner” I can have is a divine Father and Brother. 
Ray Frink

May 21, 2023 – Here I Am
I bought myself a birthday present: a shirt emblazoned with the words ‘I Fix Stuff and I Know Things, That’s What I Do’.  I also bought it for my family who considers me a ‘MacGyver’, referring to the TV character and the creative solutions for which he was famous when confronted with problems.  It caused me to think about fixing stuff, knowing things, and acting out of love while being an imperfect Catholic, in an imperfect Church, in an imperfect world.  I will never be perfect nor will any of these institutions.  So, what am I to do? 

During a reflection on the Gospel of John, Father Mike Schmitz used an expression to describe love in its simplest form: “Here I am.”  In an article by theologian and professor of philosophy, Terence Sweeney writes: Love is as much shown in small acts of care and attention as it is in big words and bold deeds.  The Thomas Merton prayer recognizes that I really have no idea where I am going when I am making my best effort to see where God is leading me. But I do know that God is leading me on a path of love and the first step is to be present, in that moment.  I must consciously say: Here I am. 

Whether loving and serving my family, my faith and the broader community, or God’s creations, I must show up.  When a parish ministry asks for service, my first words should be “Here I Am”.       
Ray Frink

Reflections for May 8-14, 2023

Monday, May 8, 2023—Lector
I have been a lector for many years at Ss. Peter and Paul. I love to lector—I enjoy the challenge of interpreting the text for the congregation. It comes with a lot of responsibility though, as how I speak the words will impact the engagement and the understanding of those at Mass. I am confident in public speaking and in reading aloud. But even for me, some of the texts can be challenging. For example, Paul was quite a wordy writer and therefore can be very difficult to read. Some of his sentences are long enough to be considered a paragraph! There are passages with redundancies or archaic language, awkward commas and difficult to pronounce names, all left for the lectors to interpret and proclaim.
I understand that not everyone has a desire to be a lector. I think of Moses who in Ex. 4:10 protested that he could not speak to the people: “If you please, my Lord, I have never been eloquent, neither in the past nor now that you have spoken to your servant; but I am slow of speech and tongue.” But God responds that Moses will instead put the words into Aaron’s mouth. None of us can speak the Word as God would speak it, but surely there are those amongst us who He can speak through! Let us give thanks that our parish is blessed with many wonderful lectors who stand up each week to beautifully proclaim God’s message, and we pray for those considering this ministry!                                                                                    Erin Gallawa

Tuesday, May 9, 2023—Serving Sacraments
In preparing for my grandma’s funeral Mass last month, I became so very aware of the importance of our compassionate parishioners who volunteer their time in funeral ministry. It is so valuable that there are those who are willing to walk through the planning of a Mass with grieving families. Whether it be a funeral Mass, a wedding or a baptism, people need preparation and guidance for the Sacraments.
When my husband and I were preparing for our marriage at Ss. Peter and Paul, we were invited to join in the marriage preparation class, led by married couples in our parish. We worked with the wedding coordinator to plan the Mass. Four years later, my girls were baptized at Ss. Peter and Paul on Mother’s Day of 2011. As with our marriage, there was a team of people who taught the Baptism class and then came to the church on the day of the baptism to guide us through the day.
Our parish is rich with people who assist in Sacrament preparation. From the education to the Sacrament itself, there is a lay volunteer sharing their time and talent to make each baptism, wedding and funeral a sacred day. When we are preparing for these Sacraments, we are often filled with emotion. Sometimes we are also planning parties and making arrangements for family travel. It is a gift that there are volunteers who guide us through all the education and decisions that are needed for these important days. God bless those who share in the work of preparing us for the Sacraments.                                             
Erin Gallawa

Wednesday, May 10, 2023—Eucharistic Minister
Of all the things I have felt called to do in the Church, being a Eucharistic Minister is not one of them. I was trained to be a Eucharistic Minster years ago when I worked at a Catholic high school. I faithfully served in that ministry for four years. But it is not where I feel called to serve. When I see our Eucharistic ministers stand on the altar in preparation to receive the Eucharist, I am moved by their posture and their attentiveness. When I sit in the front row, I watch them serve each person with dignity and reverent enthusiasm.
In many ways, it is almost surprising that I don’t feel passionate about serving the Body of Christ. Preparing and serving food to others is one of my favorite ways to show love in daily life. My grandma and my mom have set a standard for hospitality. But in the Church, I find that I prefer to serve in other ways.
God gave us unique gifts to serve one another in the Church and in our daily lives… He has not asked us to do everything, He has simply asked us to do something. In what way is he calling you to serve?             
Erin Gallawa

Thursday, May 11, 2023—In Memory
In the last two months, my husband and I have each lost a very special grandma. They were not alike in many ways, except in their love for opening their homes and feeding people. Grandma Francine’s house was like a gourmet buffet—when you arrived the food was ready and everyone ate when and where it pleased them. At my grandma’s house, everyone squeezed around a table that could hardly contain all the people and food. Both were beautiful experiences.
With both women suddenly gone, I feel a greater connection than ever to Jesus’ command, “Do this in memory of me.” Every time we celebrate the Eucharist, Christ is with us in the Real Presence. He picked the most natural of ways to remember him—in the breaking of bread and the drinking of wine, all while gathered around a table with people he loved. Sharing a family meal feels like the most natural way to remember Mama Sara and Grandma Francine, too—gathered together with the same type of meal that they prepared for us for so many decades.                                                                                                               
Erin Gallawa

Friday, May 12, 2023—Early Riser
For years I have gotten up before 6am to run. As life has changed, I have found my weekend runs getting later and later. For the last 5 months, I have enjoyed slow, cold mornings at home before lazily showing up to the trail at 9:30am. As the weather has started shifting recently and the sun is rising just a little earlier each day, I find myself yearning to be out the door sooner than expected. The change in season is demanding a change in my body.
We read in Genesis about God’s creation of the earth and the sun and the moon. God created each day, each week, each year and each season. All of God’s four perfect seasons feel like an invitation to shift my life and to live in alignment with what is happening around me. For now, I am choosing to accept that God wants me out just a little earlier this weekend to enjoy his sunrise.                                                          
Erin Gallawa

Saturday, May 13, 2023—Mary Garden
I went walking before dawn last Monday as I often do. Right as the sun was rising, I walked past the most perfect red rose and I stopped to look at it. At that moment it occurred to me that it was the first day of May—the month of Mary—and I was very moved to see such a beautiful sign to remind me of her!
This May I am choosing to focus on the Blessed Mother, in honor of my late grandma who had a strong dedication to her, and in honor of Mother’s Day. I recently learned about a Mary Garden, the practice of creating and tending to a garden with a Mary statue at its center. Of course there are many large-scale examples of this, but I had never thought of doing it in my house! This ancient tradition of creating a space for prayer and contemplation feels especially necessary for me in this season of my life. I hope that the external signs of flowers will be a constant reminder of my inward call to pray.
Mother Mary, pray for us!                                                                                                                                           
Erin Gallawa

Sunday, May 14, 2023—Mother’s Day
I have been a mother for a little more than a quarter of my life—less time than I have been a daughter, a sister, a friend or a wife. But it has transformed me in a way that no other relationship has. When I think of my experience of motherhood, it is the only time I contemplate what it must feel like to be God—to have such a deep and unconditional love that I can physically feel it in my core.
Obviously, motherhood has changed over the last 12 years. My babies arrived unexpectedly 6.5 weeks early, and they haven’t stopped keeping me on my toes since then! I remember the intensity of the early days of having infant twins, the exhaustion of chasing toddlers, the first days of school and the first disappointments. I didn’t know how much becoming a mom would transform what I knew about love. I was also surprised by how motherhood changed what I knew and believed about my own mom. I feel a different appreciation and love for her as I experience each new phase of motherhood.
On this day and on all days, I am grateful for the opportunity to be a mother, and the blessing of my own mom and all she has done for me. I give thanks that my parenting journey has been accompanied by a wonderful husband, a beautiful community of faithful women, and our entire Church community helping me raise my children in the faith. Happy Mother’s Day!                                                                                        Erin Gallawa

Reflections for May 1-7, 2023
May 1, 2023 - Sins Forgiven and Sins Retained
I have always wondered about the verse in John 20:23 where John has Jesus saying, “if you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven them; if you retain the sins of any, they are retained.” Does Jesus want his disciples to retain sins?? Is this an invitation to judgment? I know there are many approaches to interpreting scripture.  What interests me most with this passage is what does it mean for me, for my life and relationships?  Here’s an interpretation from writer and pastor, Steve Garnaas-Holmes, that speaks to me: “If you retain the sins of any and cling to judgment, you stay in the past, still suffering the offense; the condemnation you intend for another, you bear yourself.”
When I forgive, I unbind the other from my judgment, and I unbind myself from my anger, my resentment, and my hurt. In that process, which can sometimes be very hard, I open myself and our relationship to healing. I might gain some understanding of why my sense of anger or hurt went so deep or gain a little insight into the other person’s hurts and fears.  When we forgive, we free ourselves too.
Renee Anaclerio

May 2, 2023 - Lessons from the Bees
A friend of ours is a retired biologist who is committed to helping honey bees by setting up hives among his neighbors.  Bees are threatened by pesticides, drought, habitat destruction, and air pollution to name a few, and they are essential to pollination.  We have bees and other insects to thank for our food.
I feel good about the home we are providing for our hive, and I am learning about the miracles that are right in my own backyard. God’s creation is a miracle greater than we can imagine!  From the bees I learn about interconnection, care and sacrifice. Everything in God’s creation is interconnected.  The bees survive the winter because each new generation plays a role in caring for the future of the hive.  Some bees are scouts, guards, and undertakers. Some care for the queen and some produce honey. Some bring back pollen and nectar, and some collect water. Imagine how they carry water!
Cutting our grass short cuts off the tiny flowers that the bees love most, so we wait longer between cuts and leave patches of clover. I’ve learned that the honey is for the bees. It’s their winter food.  We only get some if it is an abundant summer and there is extra. I realize that I wander among miracles every day.  God’s creation holds so much that is hidden until we have ears to hear and eyes to see.  I wonder, what are all the other miracles that I miss?
Renee Anaclerio

 May 3, 2023 - The Mass as Active
I believe that service to our parish includes active participation in our celebration of Mass.  I appreciate how we, as a parish family, do so many things that reinforce our collective participation in the Mass.  As it has been said by many, we don’t come “to watch Father say Mass,” we come to actively participate as the Body of Christ. Our collective expression of this is seen in our participation in song and prayer, in the movements of sitting, kneeling and standing together.  I appreciated Fr. Bony’s reminder to stand together after receiving the Body of Christ.  We gather as the Body to receive the Body that sustains us.  I learned years ago that Mass is not a time of private prayer.  We stand together until the last person among us receives because we are the Church.  As we are sent forth to love and serve the Lord, I understand this to mean that we carry the presence of Christ into the world, into all its brokenness and injustice.  Our presence as the Body of Christ should change the world, one person, one ministry, one community at a time.  As my faiths deepens, it draws in more and more of my life. My social and economic attitudes, my relationships, my choice of work and friends are all expressions of how I identify as a part of the Body of Christ. In the Mass the Body gathers, and the Body is sent forth to love and serve.
Renee Anaclerio
  
May 4, 2023 - Our God Images
The Discerning Heart, by Wilkie Au and Noreen Cannon Au is one of my favorite books on prayer.  My copy is heavily highlighted and dog-eared, and I love it because it talks about the path of spiritual growth not as well mapped and linear, but as graced with nuances and shaded paths that disappear around corners.  One of my favorite quotes is, “We meet God as the one we imagine God to be.” Their point is that how we perceive God dramatically influences how we see ourselves and how we think about life.   My God images directly affect the way I think, feel, act and pray. I appreciate how I have come to experience God’s deep intimacy and to “know” God, while at the same time recognizing God as great Mystery, unknowable in many ways, and certainly not a God I can contain in my intellect. 
As creatures we can create images of the ineffable mystery of God that look a lot like us or like our life experiences. If my God images are distant and formal or judgmental of certain groups of people, I think about what messages I might have received through my experiences or from the culture that created those images. As The Discerning Heart says, I must see through my God images to the God beyond them.
Renee Anaclerio

May 5, 2023 - Discerning Service
Discernment is not formulaic. It is more like an individual art that we develop through learning and experience. In The Discerning Heart, Wilkie Au and Noreen Cannon Au say, “God's mysterious guidance comes to us in personal and unique ways that we must honor. We need to be aware of the particular ways in which we are influenced and led by God, as well as the personal ways we are susceptible to being deceived and misled.”  That last line had a bit of a sting to it when I first read it.  But it has been so helpful to me over the years.  When I feel possessive of my role in a ministry or I feel my savior complex rising, I know it’s time to re-examine my perspective and my role.  Likewise, if I find myself assuming I can’t do something or find myself rejecting an invitation, I need to pause and listen to the Spirit within and be open to new paths.  I remember hearing Edwina Gateley talk about a long discernment retreat in which she asked God where she was called to serve.  An answer popped into her head, “work with prostitutes,” to which she replied out loud, “What??!!!”  As she overcame her own biases and insecurities, she eventually went on to develop a ministry and founded Genesis House for hospitality for women in Chicago. I pray that I will be open to God’s surprise invitations to serve and be aware of my ego’s competing desires, hesitations and fears.
Renee Anaclerio

May 6, 2023  - Adult Prayer
The readings from the Gospel according to John speak to Jesus’s love for us. “I am in my Father and you are in me and I in you” (John 14:20). I think about how I have sometimes been acutely aware of this love, and how sometimes I have had dry spells in my prayer life. In preparation for a recent workshop, I was reading Sr. Rose Mary Dougherty’s writings on prayer and discernment.  She writes, “Emotional alienation does not imply an offence against God or moral failure, but it may imply a failure to grow in our relationship…Our prayer loses vitality when we hold on to old forms that no longer honor and reflect what seems to be going on between God and ourselves.”  These are challenging words to hear. I realize how sometimes I am dependent on my emotions to confirm my sense of God’s comfort and care. It took a while to realize that this view was limiting, and that periods of dryness are part of the spiritual journey. I think about my own growth, and I remember how often, before I recognized it as growth, change felt like loss.  But God helps me grow and teaches me when old patterns and ways of praying have lost vitality. I also realized my images of God have changed and matured.  I trust that God guides my, and our, spiritual growth and urges us beyond the world views and understanding of faith that marked our earlier years.
Renee Anaclerio
 
May 7, 2023 - Care for our Common Home
Pope Francis’ Laudato Si has sparked many conversations about our responsibility for the environment. “It cannot be emphasized enough how everything is interconnected… fragmentation of knowledge and the isolation of bits of information can actually become a form of ignorance, unless they are integrated into a broader vision of reality” (no.138). I’m glad Bishop Soto has asked all parishes to reflect, act and evaluate in respond to Pope Francis's urgent call. My family has reduced our use of plastics, eliminated pesticides, installed solar, etc., but what has been most meaningful is learning about the impacts of our actions and policies, both individually and collectively.  I learned that air quality in poor communities in Sacramento is notably worse than in the rest of the area, and rates of asthma and cancer are higher because of environmental toxins. Temperatures are higher in poor neighbourhoods because there are fewer trees. While my family can minimize our carbon footprint and make our own lives healthier, I wonder what we might do together as God’s people to advocate for the health and well-being of those who suffer the most? Pope Francis says, “we are part of nature, included in it and in constant interaction with it. Recognizing the reasons why a given area is polluted requires a study of the workings of society, its economy, its behavior patterns, and the ways it grasps reality” (no.139). What if churches in our diocese worked together to understand how we are interconnected and advocated to improve the lives of our brothers and sisters?
Renee Anaclerio

Reflections for Reflections for Apr. 24-30, 2023

April 24, 2023 - In Your Eyes 
There are two secular artists that write very spiritual songs, Bob Dylan, and Peter Gabriel. So many of Dylan’s songs have been about the struggles that touch people’s souls, so much so that Bishop Robert Barron calls Bob Dylan a spiritual poet. I think Peter Gabriel is also a spiritual poet. He has written songs about loss of meaning, redemption, mental health, death, and spiritual love. One of his most recognizable songs is “In Your Eyes”.  Like many of Dylan’s, this song can have two meanings: a romantic relationship, or a spiritual relationship with God. It talks about how we can get lost and feel alone and isolated but there is still a spark inside of us.  If we allow that spark to connect to someone else, we can feel the light and heat of love. For me, it is a spiritual love that I hear in that song. I imagine looking into Jesus’ eyes and seeing myself the way God sees me through His eyes. In the live version Peter added the lyrics:
Accepting all I’ve done and said
I want to stand and stare again                                                                                                
'Til there’s nothing left out 
It remains there in your eyes.
To me that is the meaning of reconciliation:  Jesus seeing my sins and restoring me. His love makes me complete. Take some time and listen to this beautiful and meaningful song.                                                                    Kurt Peterson

April 25, 2023 - Living in Color
Growing up I was taught by my parents to be “color blind”;  to judge people by their character not the color of their skin. For many years I have lived by that but with the different voices that are coming at us from all sides now, I have had to rethink that idea. I have come to understand that it is not about being “color blind” but about seeing the whole person. The basic premise is still there, to judge people on their character, but it adds to see people for who they are. God created us in all shapes, sizes, and colors. We have all been given different abilities but there is one thing that is the same for all of us. We are God’s children. I will continue not to judge someone by the color of their skin, but I will see them in all the different ways the glory of God has been given to them.      Kurt Peterson

April 26, 2023 - And Their Numbers Grew
During this Easter season, we are hearing about the beginning of our church proclaimed from the Book of Acts. We learn about the wonders that the early faith community did and how the Holy Spirit moved through them. One thing is often repeated, “and their numbers grew”. Many times we hear these readings as history, things of the past. But just like Jesus, the Church is past/present/future. Since Pentecost, the church has been growing. We see it today at baptisms throughout the year, but we see it in all its glory every Easter Vigil. The Vigil is the night that those going through the Rite of Christian Initiation of Adults (RCIA) are fully initiated into the church. They are on fire for the Lord as they become a vital part of our community. I was initiated into the church at the Easter Vigil over 35 years ago and the feelings I experienced then will never be forgotten. If you have never gone to the Easter Vigil Mass, I encourage you to do so. It is something that all Catholics should attend at least once. And you will experience what the early church meant:  “and their numbers grew".                                                    Kurt Peterson

April 27, 2023 - Hearing Through the Noise
Remember when we first started the outdoor Masses during covid and how we sat in our cars listening to the Mass on the radio as if we were in a Drive-In? Sometimes the reception was not good, or the speakers’ voices would go in and out. Or if it was a windy day, their voices would be drowned out by the noise of the wind. And if you were an usher working in the far back areas you may hardly have heard anything. I found that time to be very difficult. But that experience also reminds me of my life growing up. My family believed in God, but we had no faith community in our lives to nurture it. My mom taught me about Jesus, but we were never part of a church or community, so I never had a real understanding of my beliefs. It was like sitting in the car and only hearing bits and pieces that get through the noise of the world.  That all changed with Sarah and her mom, Celia. Their faith has been a bedrock for me. They gave me a faith community to be part of and I heard God clearly for the first time. I am forever grateful for the three women in my life that helped me discover the greatest gift…..Faith.                                
Kurt Peterson

April 28, 2023 - I Do Now
Sarah and I watch the show “Call the Midwife”. It is about a group of midwives who work in the East End neighborhood of London called Poplar. They work at Nonnatus House, for a religious Anglican order of nuns and it shows how they care for the people in that neighborhood. In one episode many of the people of Poplar were being displaced out of the area in order to tear it down and modernize it. An old Jewish couple who were being evicted, were still in their family home because the wife was dying. The husband sat next to her bed and began a little monologue about what she meant to him. He told her how she took care of him, how she took care of the home, how she took care of the children. And each time he finished it with “If I haven’t told you before, I do now.” The last thing he told her was how much he loved her and he said “If I haven’t told enough before, I do now.” Then she passed. It reminded me of Jesus on the cross.  The Bible is all about how God cares for us and that He sent His only Son to be the final sign of redemption for us through His death and Resurrection. And when we go to Mass, we give thanks for all He has done for us and like the old Jewish man to his wife, we say to Jesus, “If I haven’t told you before, I do now”.                                                                 
Kurt Peterson

April 29, 2023 - Closure
My mother-in-law was a second mother to me. She was a part of our lives and was always there to help me in many ways. But when she passed, she gave me the greatest gift…closure. My Father retired in Mexico and had my grandparents live with him there. When my Grandparents and father passed away in Mexico, I was not able to travel out there for the funeral. So, I never had closure with their deaths. But when my mother-in-law was on Hospice care at our house, we had about 3 weeks to spend time with her and then a week preparing her funeral after she passed. With all of Sarah’s brothers, their families, and our family I grieved not only for Celia but also for my grandparents and dad. And when Celia was laid to rest I was also able, in my mind, to lay my grandparents and my dad to rest.  Celia helped me finally have closure for them.                                                  
Kurt Peterson

April 30, 2023 - Nonviolence
Today’s second reading is from 1^st Peter chapter 2. Peter says in Verse 2 “If you are patient when you suffer for doing what is good, this is a grace before God.” He goes on to explain that when Jesus was insulted, he did not act in like manner, nor did he threaten others when He suffered. Peter tells us that we are to do the same. This is something completely against our human nature. When we get hurt, we can have the tendency to want to hurt back, sometimes at a higher level. If you watched the second game in the Kings/Warriors playoff series, you saw this played out. In the fourth quarter the King’s player Domantas Sabonis was on the ground and grabbed Draymond Green’s ankle. Green reacted by stomping on Sabonis’ chest. That action ejected Green from the game. We use an eye for an eye as an excuse to react back.  However, that Jewish law was meant to exercise fairness in punishment. The punishment was not to be greater than the crime. Green’s stomping on Sabonis’ chest was a harsher reaction. Jesus tells us to turn the other check. Why? Because this makes the other person wrong in their action. Green could have let that go but instead his response was worse than Sabonis’ action. Lord, help me to remember your example that the true path to peace is nonviolence.                    Kurt Peterson

Reflections for April 17-23, 2023

April 17, 2023 - Passion of Christ
During my recent  sabbatical course, I had the fortunate opportunity to watch Oberammergau’s passion play. This show happens once in ten years - a breathtaking one! The show is a five-hour performance about the Passion of our Lord Jesus Christ. The next day, we went to the Dachau concentration camp in Bavaria. As I walked through it and saw the sight, I could not breathe, just thinking about human suffering. It was not a pleasant sightseeing. The next day, my priest friend and classmate came to see me. We had not met for 13 years; for the past ten years, he has been bearing a cross in the form of a rare cancer. I was shocked when I saw him. He looked very pale and weak. While listening to his journey through the illness and sensing his high spirit, I was surprised and inspired. He related his bearing of this illness to Jesus’ Passion. “But rejoice in as much as you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed” (1 Peter 4:13). Lord, give us strength to carry our daily crosses and partake in your sufferings and glory. Amen. 
Bony

April 18, 2023 - The Risen
I was at Calvary Cemetery for the burial of Patricia Wight, and her cremains were joined to her husband, Fred Wight. The Wights were founding members of the SS. Peter & Paul Parish and were very active in many ministries. After the committal service, one of the children thanked everyone present and commented with a big smile, “We know that they are not here.”  That statement confirmed our Christian faith of sharing in the Resurrection of Christ. Therefore, our emotional attachment to earthly remains can also remind us of the heavenly heritage shared by Christ. For he takes us to himself, so that where he is we might be (Ref John 14: 1-3).
Bony

April 19, 2023 – Mother Mary
Visiting the shrine to Our Lady of Lourdes was a profound spiritual experience. One prayer I was reciting the entire time I was there was the ‘Hail Mary’…. And sitting at the grotto for a personal rosary was a grace-filled moment. Many pilgrims were moving around, but I was not at all disturbed. Growing up with the rosary as the family prayer came to be a deep and personal experience at the Grotto as I recalled how my mother always has a rosary by her bedside, praying for our family. “Here is your mother” (Jn19:27). I have been convinced of Mother Mary’s protection throughout my life. I could always experience her praying presence in my life. Mary, Mother of God, and our Mother, Pray for us.
Bony

April 20, 2023 - Our Home is a Home of God Too
Remember how our parish was able to support the Kambolathu family in building a safe home? I was present at the blessing of their new home. They were so expressive in their gratitude to God and to us. I was deeply impressed by a comment made by Mr. Kambolathu. He said, “This, our home is also God’s house; He has built a home for us and lives among us.” “Look, God’s home is now among his people! He will live with them, and they will be his people. God himself will be with them” (Rev.21:3). The safety of living under a roof is needed, but we need His protection more than anything in order to live in holiness. Yes, our homes need to be God’s house and treated like the temple of God where his holy people live, sharing His love and care. Lord, open our hearts and minds to Your divine presence in our homes.
Bony

April 21, 2023 - Priesthood
During Covid, I explained why we receive Holy Communion in our hands to a persistent communicant who wished to receive on the tongue. The first response from that person was: ‘My hands are not consecrated.’ Then I explained to him that in Baptism our whole body is consecrated as a priest, king, and prophet. “But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession… (1 Peter 2:9). He did not seem convinced.  But one thing I did not pay attention to was the implied meaning of his comment, ‘My hands are not consecrated.’ I should have explained to him that Priests’ and Deacons’ hands are consecrated to serve; it is not meant to set us apart. I should not think that I am privileged that way; instead, I am God’s unworthy servant ordained to serve my brothers and sisters.
Bony

April 22, 2023 - Plant a Tree, Save a New Life.
‘Plant a tree, save a new life’ was a slogan I have heard since childhood. There was a new tree planted at every important event in our family. My grandfather was very particular about it. The few fruit trees we have on our ancestral property were planted lin that manner. Some trees died; unfortunately, the next generations did not follow that wonderful tradition or refill the empty places. That impacts our lives as we now have a warmer environment. There was also a saying popular at that time, ‘a tree is a blessing.’ We are celebrating Earth Day today. Let us not delay.  Let us cultivate a culture of protecting the universe by planting more trees.  Care for our creation is equally important as caring for human life. “The earth is the Lord’s, and everything in it, the world and all who live in it (Psalm 24:1).
Bony

April 23, 2023 – The Body of Christ: The Eucharistic Community.
The Church is the living Body of Christ. “If [one] part suffers, all the parts suffer with it; if one part is honored, all the parts share its joy” (I Corinthians 12: 26).  SS. Peter & Paul Parish Community conforms to this. Mostly, we come together for parish needs and also for the needs of others.  This sense of belonging and togetherness is a gift of God. Recently, I witnessed such belongingness in our community again at the demise of baby Aiyanna Murphy. Baby Ayianna is now an angel God wants to keep with Him eternally. But it was heartbreaking for the Murphy family and anyone who knows them. Also, the Murphy family is new to the parish and did not know many people here.  On the funeral day, several of our parishioners and liturgical ministers were present, supporting the Murphy family even though they did not personally know them. This is how it should be in Christ’s Community. Christ is alive in each community member, and we are alive in Him. Let us continue to be united in Christ, testifying to His presence in our Eucharistic Life.
Bony

Reflections for April 10-16, 2023
April 10, 2023 - Two “Homes”

Being in church so much during Holy Week made it seem almost a second home.  Our parish home is not confined to the church building and has many specialized parts which I’d like to write about for a couple of days. 
I’ll start the main structure, the place where we worship and celebrate the mass and its twin side, the social hall where we celebrate in different ways.  When we “go to” mass we enter the church usually through the “front” doors which open into what some call the vestibule and others call the narthex; same thing: the main entryway to the body of the church.  It reminds me of the entry hall of my home, a place of greeting and welcoming and generally kind of noisy as people say hello to each other.  After all, we are a family.  In my home we have limited seating but there are many, many places to sit in church.  Most of us have our accustomed spot (although Fr. Bony encourages us to move around and meet new people). Many people I’ve met over the years say they have never felt so warmly welcomed as they have at SSPP.  That said, we are parishioners of varying ages mirroring families at home: infants, squirmy little ones, teens, young parents, grandparents and whoever wants to come.  This is a very important part of our connection with Christ, the community reflecting Jesus to one another .   Like I said:  a second home.
Deacon David

April 11, 2023 - Living Rooms  

Lots of things to see and be part of in the “front” of the church.  The main focus is the altar, the family table where we celebrate the Eucharistic banquet.   Left of the sanctuary there is the Ambo, or lectern, where lectors proclaim readings from the Old and New Testament, and where the priest or deacon proclaims the Gospel,  sharing the stories and history of who we are followed by the homily.  You will see two depictions of Christ in this area.  The risen Christ is high in the alcove welcoming us with open arms but there is also a crucifix carried ahead of the procession of ministers at Sunday masses.  On the slightly raised dais the priest, deacon and altar servers sit facing the congregation, much like hosts in the living room welcoming families home.   At the far left of the sanctuary there is the baptistry, used for baptism by immersion or for a simple pouring while the celebrant stands to the side.  On the right side of the sanctuary our tabernacle holds the reserved eucharist which is taken to the homebound, not as “left overs” but as a way to truly connect them to our family meal.  On the far right of the sanctuary a joyous noise is produced praising God which we are all invited to join.  These places help me remember that I too was baptized so that I could receive the Eucharist along with you, singing God’s praises and bonding me with you.  Like I said, there is a lot going on.              
Deacon David

April 12, 2023 - Necessary and Useful

There are a couple of small rooms in the church you may have noticed and maybe have used.  The larger of the two is just to the left of the main entrance. This is the sacristy where a lot of preparation goes on.  Maybe we could call it partly a dressing room as the priest’s and deacons’ vestments as well as the altar servers albs are kept there in a closet, handy for each to put on in preparation for Mass.  Mass coordinators prepare the bread and wine there for the procession to the altar and, after mass, use a special sink there to clean the chalice and patens.  Maybe a bit like a kitchen but with limited usage.  There is another small room accessed just to the right of the windows of the “cry room” and that small room is what used to be referred to as the “box” but is rightly called the confessional.  This is where a priest sits and hears peoples’ worries and sins, either face to face or anonymously behind a screen, and then counsels the penitent and assigns a penance.  There are other small rooms that are mainly for storage as every home has to have closets.  Nowhere to lay down though.  Our own homes have such places and I pray in each one of them just as I also do in church.          
Deacon David

April 13, 2023 – Our House

“Our house……there’s always something going on…,our house, it has a crowd and its usually quite loud….”     Those words from a 1982 song sung by Madness have surfaced as I’m writing these reflections.  They relate to both the house that I call home as well as my home away from home: SS Peter and Paul.  Our church building is not the only place where crowds and activities occur.  The first building we see on the left entering from Granite Drive is the office where some of the friendliest people I know work.  No matter who you see on entering, it is a person with a smile and kind word of greeting.  Individual offices resound with conversation and laughter as parish work gets done.  Just a stone’s throw from the office is the social hall which hosts coffee and donuts after mass, funeral and wedding receptions, as well as holiday festivities; times to mix with old friends and new and to share joy as well as grief.  The newly renamed Father Dillon Center is across from the front of the Church and hosts meetings and classes such as R.C.I.A.  The Religious Education building spans the width of the property with classrooms used to instruct all age groups in aspects of our faith.  Another large meeting space, the multi-purpose room, hosts meetings as well as occasional meals.  Each of these places fosters a feeling of community, just as our homes do.  So you can see that our house covers a lot of territory that serves our SSPP family.
Deacon David

April 14, 2023 -  Lenten Practices?

You can eat whatever you want today.  On a recent Friday during lent I was going through the leftovers in the fridge and saw the remnants of a Costco chicken and thought to myself, there’s lunch.  As I washed my hands before heating the chicken, the light bulb in my head illuminated my thought process…..Oh, today’s Friday, no meat.  But wait a second, I thought, maybe it would be a good idea to carry the practice of abstinence with me into Ordinary time because, after all, when I first came to the church, abstinence was practiced every Friday. That led me to think about other Lenten practices such as spending more time in prayer and spiritual reading as well as avoiding time-wasting TV watching.  This lent I did pretty well avoiding overeating, especially high calorie, low nutrition foods (oh, but I love donuts) and it would do me well, pants size wise, to continue those good eating practices.  Our church doesn’t require much in the way of sacrifice as compared with “…the good old days” but it would behoove me to think twice about my consumption of everything, given the obvious concerns with poverty, hunger and homelessness I read about daily in the news.  Thanks to our Lord Jesus for modelling a way of life that is an example of what my daily life could be.  No meat on….                      
Deacon David

April 15, 2023 – Easter Birthday?          

My sister Peggy was an “Easter” baby having been born near Easter on this date (I can’t tell you the actual year under penalty of…..) and I’ve always told her that when I look back on our early years I have felt that she was an only child.  She disputes the validity of this claim, pointing out that I was never given a curfew or asked just who I was going out with.  Anyway, April 15 has always been a special time and we make sure to call each other on our birthdays and joke about how old we’re getting.  Besides the birthday gifts, Easter eggs and Sees candies it has become more important for me, who is still learning and growing in my faith, to see this time as the birthday of the church which, of course, will be celebrated formally on Pentecost.  But without the Resurrection there would be no Easter, no Pentecost and little hope.  And the 15^th would be, for all of us taxpayers in the U.S.A., just a day of reckoning with the tax man.  But, gloriously, we do have this annual period of great joy for our Lord has truly risen and my heart is full as I hope yours is too.  Alleluia!
Deacon David

April 16, 2023 -  Service

The Easter season lasts 8 weeks that include the Ascension and Pentecost.  During these weeks I strive to remember the lessons of Lent, especially the lessons of Holy Thursday when Jesus modelled, not only for his disciples but also for me, the necessity of being a servant to all people, humbling myself the way Jesus did.
Jesus, Rabbi, Master, teacher and friend gave all that he had to show me what he expects, maybe demands, of me who claims to be his follower.  The need to be of service in whatever way I can was made clear in the washing of the feet Holy Thursday.  I am called to humility not only in washing another’s feet but also in allowing someone to bend down and wash mine.  I don’t expect I’ll be doing that out in the greater community but there are myriad ways to bend to others’ needs daily.  It could be as simple as letting someone go first at a four-way boulevard stop or in line at the market.  It could be acknowledging the needs of someone struggling to make ends meet or to find housing and giving up a little cash.  It could be responding to the ongoing needs of our parish family that needs ushers and Eucharistic ministers.  SERVICE is what Jesus modelled and that is what I’m called to, not only during the Easter season when I wash someone’s feet but all my life.  I hope you will help me remember the lessons of Lent.
Deacon David

Reflections for April 3-9, 2023

April 3, 2023- “Dad-isms”
Children have a delightful way of keeping us humble.  One day our three adult daughters started remembering things that my husband has told them over the years, things like, “it’s not a tank” (referencing their tendency to slam the car doors), “use the right tool for the job”, “lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on mine” and so many more!  I smiled as I listened to their conversation because it was clear that his advice is still with them.  They’ve even called them “dad-isms”. 
It reminded me of another time when one of my daughters stopped me midway in a conversation and said, “I know what you’re going to say”.  I smugly responded “my job is done.  I’m in your head now!”
Clearly Jesus’ disciples remembered many of the important stories and conversations they had with Jesus.  We are blessed to have access to these words in the bible, passed along by oral tradition.  I suppose the work for us now is to imprint the words of Jesus in our own brains! 
Darcy Wharton

April 4, 2023- There’s Nothing You Can Do
Phillip Yancy, a popular Christian author, once penned, “There’s nothing you can do to make God love you more and nothing you can do to make God love you less”.  Re-read that.  I had to read it (and hear it) several times before the depth of truth in that statement reached into my soul.  Essentially, this is the very definition of grace.  We don’t earn it!  God’s very nature is love. 
What this means is that when I do good things for other people, it is an expression of the love already given to me by God, not an act that will make God love me more. 
God’s unconditional love is an incredible gift to us.  There is nothing I can do except humbly receive this love and do my best to pass it along to others. 
Darcy Wharton

April 5, 2023-Any Place, Any Time
Although I am aware that God is present at all times and in all places, it can be easy to forget.  The other day, I was at the hair salon and I found myself practically doing spiritual direction with the stylist.  Typically, stylists find themselves being the ones to listen to others, but I sensed that there were a few things troubling her, so I asked a few questions to “turn the tables” so to speak.  I smiled to myself at how clever God was.  I thought I was taking a break from my “work” by getting my hair done and instead I found that I was being called into action on my off-hours!
I am convinced that God gives us nudges in any place and at any time.  The Spirit moves as it will!
The wind blows where it wishes, and you hear its sound, but you do not know where it comes from or where it goes. So it is with everyone who is born of the Spirit.”- John 3:8
Darcy Wharton

April 6, 2023- As I Have Done For You
Despite strong opposition from Peter (and likely the other disciples), Jesus humbly washes the feet of his friends.  Would I have reacted in the same way, refusing to let Jesus wash my feet?  Although I would like to think that I would have not been as outspoken as Peter, I know better.  As I think of people I highly respect, I never want them to do something that I feel that I could (or should) do myself.  For example, if a dinner guest offered to scrub my toilet, I would strongly resist that!  I even have a difficult time when someone offers to wash the dishes or to bring a meal when it could be very helpful.
Jesus’ model of washing feet and then commanding that his disciples wash one another’s feet implies that two things are important.  First, I have to learn to graciously receive. In my opinion, this is the harder part of the command.  It is easier for me to be of service to others.  However, if I have not learned to humbly receive from God before serving others, I may actually be serving my ego instead of God. 
Jesus knows our hearts and makes a very strong statement to Peter (and to me).  “If I, the master and teacher, have washed your feet, you ought to wash one another’s feet.  I have given you a model to follow, so that as I have done for you, you should also do.”
Darcy Wharton

April 7, 2023- Finding the Good
As a child, I dreaded Good Friday.  We were not allowed to play with friends or watch any television.  Instead, we were at church from 12:00-3:00 PM.  There was little laughter or joy and the day took on an ominous tone.  It was even more dramatic if it was a cloudy day, which it always seemed to be.  I wondered why they bothered to call it “Good Friday” when there wasn’t much good about it.  I might also have been a bit cranky because it was a day of fast, something my parents encouraged even though I wasn’t yet at the age prescribed by the Church.
As an adult, I have a deeper understanding of Good Friday.  I appreciate knowing that when we adore the cross, we are symbolically accepting all of our own “crosses”, no matter how light or heavy they might be.  In John’s gospel which we read on Good Friday, we encounter Jesus being fully confident and prepared for his suffering.  While on the cross, we also hear Jesus asking John to take his mother Mary into her home- a wonderful act of love.  What an amazing example.  When I am in the midst of suffering, do I think of others and how I can prevent them from suffering?
There are many “good” things about this day: Jesus humbly accepting the path before him, his acceptance of a horrific death with no need for retaliation, and his loving care for his mother, to name a few.  All of this allowed the resurrection to be possible.  That is good, indeed!
Darcy Wharton

April 8, 2023- Between the Times
I heard once that most of us spend our lives in a “Holy Saturday” experience.  Many of our days are not particularly memorable and we are often waiting for something to happen.  There can be a sense of emptiness in this experience.  I think of older people living alone with no one to visit, prisoners who are separated from society, children who come home to empty homes, and people waiting to hear medical test results. So. Much. Waiting. 
Of course, we have the hindsight to know that Jesus’ death was not the end of the story.  Can I remember this when I am in a day or season of “waiting”?  What can I learn from spending a quiet day in reflection?  Perhaps I can once be inspired by the song, “Between the Times” by Marty Haugen (available on Youtube).  The chorus gets me every time!
 “Between the times of plenty, when the song is just a whisper in our lives,
 or the time that we must grieve because the words that we believe aren’t coming true. 
What shall we do between the times?”
Darcy Wharton

April 9, 2023- A Happy Ending
Who doesn’t love a happy ending? It might be due to being raised on Disney movies and sanitized fairy tales, but I love when things end on a high note.  There is truly no better ending to the Triduum than our Easter Vigil and Easter Day celebrations! 
I truly can’t imagine my life without knowing that there is a good ending to our experiences as followers of Christ.  Despite denial from His followers and an incredibly painful death, Jesus rose from the dead!  It is too good to be true and yet it is!  This means that when I experience betrayals, disappointments, suffering, and grief, it’s not the end of the story.  My story, too, can end on a high note. 
Chocolate bunnies, Peeps, and colored eggs don’t begin to express the real meaning of Easter in my life, but they are strong reminders to me that this is a day that deserves to be celebrated.  The paschal mystery (suffering, death, and resurrection) is part of all of my individual life and the life of our community.
Happy Easter, church!
Darcy Wharton

Reflections for Mar. 27- April 2, 2023

March 27, 2023 – At My Side

Praying in the pews at mass took on new meaning after having children.  When the girls were little, I longed for the sleeping child on my shoulder during mass; instead we were always moving between the pew, the vestibule, and the bell tower.  In fact, I think we spent more time away from the pew than seated in it, and I rarely caught an entire homily…often returning to the pew just in time to join the communion line. 
As the girls have grown though, I have noticed moments when I have a child on either side of me in the pew, leaning their heads on my shoulders…they are grown enough to lay their heads on my shoulder!  In those moments, I feel supported and loved – the presence of God at my side.

Today’s Psalm proclaims, “Even though I walk in the dark valley, I fear no evil for you are at my side.”  We hear this psalm so often in times of darkness, pain and strife because it is during those times when we need to be reminded of God’s presence the most.  The challenge for me is to remember to feel God’s presence at my side in the day-to-day living as well.  So, I relish the moments when others (especially my children) mirror God’s love and support to me in the simplest of ways…leaning into God’s love.
-Katie Maynard

March 28, 2023 – Lunchbox Notes

To know, love and serve God – it is the call of a disciple.  I often find it easier to know God’s love and more difficult to feel God’s love because of obstacles such as guilt and shame which get in the way of experiencing God’s love.  But, if I can allow myself to receive the abundant love of God, then it naturally pours over and out into my life and I can pass it to others readily.  Sometimes it is so simple and so small that I don’t even recognize it as service.

Last year, my husband Casey noticed how making lunches for my girls had become overwhelming for me among the many other things on my “To Do Ticker.”  Not only did he take over making their lunches, but he also packed me a lunch for my work day, and added the sweetest touch of handwritten notes to all of us on our napkins.  He has continued to do this without fail and it has been an incredible example of service for us all.  God’s love poured out into these handwritten notes – a moment of grace in the midst of our busy days. 
The grace doesn’t end here however, because God’s love is abundant and can’t help but get passed on.  You see, my girls have now started writing notes to me in my lunchbox, passing on what was modeled to them by their dad – bringing joy and tenderness to my day.  God’s love poured out in service with the cutest handwriting ever.
-Katie Maynard

March 29, 2023 – Spills

As a Christmas gift, we all received a more grown-up version of a “paint-by-number,” and we took the quiet time of the holiday break to work on them together as a family at our dining room table.  When we finished a “session” we cleaned up the paint, but left it on the table to work on whenever we felt called. 

One day I took my coffee to the table for an idyllic morning of coffee and painting, when with one stroke of the brush, I bumped the mug and coffee spilled all over my canvas, me and the floor.  Now, I’m a pretty calm person, but I was freaking out on the inside…not only because of how hard I had been working on that canvas, but also because I had a huge mess to clean up.

And then the sweetest thing unfolded as my girls immediately came to my rescue with towels and hugs.  I was struck by an incredible sense of relief to have someone else help me clean up a mess.  As things got cleaned up and we looked at the canvas we noticed that the stain wasn’t that bad and would likely be covered by paint anyway.

God rescues us with towels and hugs all the time when we spill or make messes and he doesn’t make us clean it up by ourself – he is with us as we pick ourselves up and see things anew.
-Katie Maynard

March 30, 2023 – Anticipation and Recognition

For Lent we decided as a family that it was time to start watching the television series The Chosen together on a weekly basis.  The first episode was a bit intense and a little scary for my youngest daughter as we saw Mary Magdalene consumed by darkness.  But I noticed that as the episode progressed, we were all on the edge of our seat…waiting …when finally my daughter exclaimed, “Where is Jesus?!”  She spoke the words that we were all feeling: anticipation and a need for Jesus to step in and help.  And then when Jesus appeared, there was immediate recognition as our gasps were audible and we all exclaimed in unison, “It’s Jesus!”  

In that beautiful moment, we experienced the hope of our faith, and our need for Jesus as a family.  And, at the same time, we experienced the call of our faith to surrender our hearts to God, and to recognize Jesus in the midst of our lives…to exclaim “It’s Jesus!” all day long.
-Katie Maynard

March 31, 2023 – Lenten Lunches

I remember being a young Catholic at a public school during Lent feeling both awkward and proud about the ashes on my forehead, and feeling the same way when Lenten observances became obvious (especially fasting from meat on Fridays).  Similarly, my daughters have been navigating what it means to express their faith at school.  My youngest daughter came home after school on a Friday recently and said, “Mom, I talked to the lunch lady and our friends about Lent today.”  When I asked her to tell me more, she explained that when she realized that her designated hot lunch was a pepperoni pizza roll, she said to the lunch lady, “I can’t eat this because I’m Catholic, but I’ll just take the pepperoni out.”  Then, when she returned to her cafeteria table, her friends were curious about why Catholics couldn’t eat meat on Friday.  This curiosity led to a discussion about how Jesus sacrificed his life for us and so we sacrifice by giving up things like meat during the 40 days of Lent…”just like Jesus in the desert!”

A cafeteria table of third graders sharing a meal and talking about Jesus’ loving sacrifice – such a profound image of a Lenten journey full of conviction and witness.
-Katie Maynard 

April 1, 2023 – Savor

I’ve always been fascinated by the agrarian life and how Jesus intentionally wove metaphors of the land into his teaching.  In listening to his parables, I have come to understand the importance of sowing the seeds and being the good soil for God’s word to take root.  That being said, it’s the harvesting part that I could use some work with…savoring what has been sown.

As the nutrients have developed and things have reached maturity, the harvester gathers what is useful, and allows what remains to go back into the soil to grow and develop.  The harvest brings food and nutrition to a community; it celebrates what fruit is born from labor and love; and it is a patient process – always looking backwards in order to look ahead.

I am planting seeds all the time: with my children, in the work that I do, and in my own heart, but do I stop to gather (or harvest) the graces of what was sown?  This harvesting is simply the act of savoring God’s work through my lived experience – nourishing those around me, delighting in my labor of love, and with a contrite and gracious heart, reflecting on and preparing for the road ahead.
-Katie Maynard

April 2, 2023 – What’s the Buzz?

Music, in particular the lyrics within the music and the movements of melody and harmony, have always been an instrument for me to experience intimacy with God.
Musicals in particular are such a powerful vehicle for storytelling.  I grew up watching my grandmother delight in “The King and I,” I listened to the soundtracks of musicals such as “Les Miserables,” “Phantom of the Opera,” and “Evita” on road trips, and as an adult have had the privilege of attending numerous musicals live on stage.  Perhaps the greatest impact though was watching my dad perform in our parish production of “Godspell” as a child.  I remember attending rehearsals with him, watching the show come together, and then being completely taken by how the story of Jesus’ life, death and resurrection came to life through song. 

Last month, we took our girls to Sacramento Broadway’s production of “Jesus Christ Superstar” and we weren’t sure how it would go over: Would it feel too intense? Would they be scared?
It turned out to be a beautiful entry into Lent as they were glued to the story…a story that they were familiar with and heard many times before.  And yet, through the music, it settled into their soul in a completely different way.  It has sparked many questions, led to beautiful conversations, and we’re still singing the songs – steeped in the Passion of Christ.
-Katie Maynard

Reflections for Mar. 20-26, 2023

March 20, 2023 – Monday – Wash me Clean
Monday was wash day when I was growing up.  Depending on how much laundry there was, it could also be ironing day.  I think back about that now and scheduling such chores seems odd.  We wash clothes when we have a full load of something and do very little ironing!  But I remember those earlier growing up days with fondness…piles of sorted clothes waiting to be washed; the smell of freshly laundered clothes as the heat of the iron hits them; folded towels and sheets waiting to be put away; the busyness, purposefulness and satisfaction of completing a task even though one knows it will all happen again next Monday. 

Lent reminds me of those Mondays.  I relate to clothes undergoing the process of being cleansed.  I am like that, sorting myself out, undergoing a process of identifying what needs to be washed out and let go of.  For me it is a time to fold the good practices of prayer and fasting back into my life in a more deliberate way and to put away some of the distractions of ordinary time.  The purposefulness of doing all of this is not self-oriented.  When I consciously forego some treat or trade a particular activity for prayer time I say that childhood prayer “all for thee oh sacred heart of Jesus”.  Thus I try to make space for a deeper awareness of and relationship with God.   And then, I’ll do it all again next year.
Jane Haproff

March 21, 2023 – Tuesday
Most wash days did not end with getting the ironing done.  So Tuesday was almost always ironing day; sprinkling the clothes with a bit of water, rolling them up and setting them aside so that they were just the right kind of dampness to iron out wrinkles.  Again I am reminded of Lent.  Unlike Advent which is a time of preparing for new birth and new life, for me Lent it a time of reckoning; a time of setting things straight and ironing out the wrinkles that can make my spiritual life messy.   It’s about recognizing my own sinfulness and accepting forgiveness.  Those are easy words to say, harder to accomplish.   As a child I had a formulaic way of approaching Reconciliation…I disobeyed my mother X number of times, I was selfish, etc.  I fully accepted that these sins were forgiven just as I also knew that Jesus died for my sins.  I don’t remember how that knowledge affected me when I was younger, but now it feels like a terrible burden.  Jesus died because I was petty, gossiped or was selfish?  That’s awful!!   Repulsed by and afraid of violence, how can I reckon the fact that my wrongdoing contributed to the violent death of Jesus?  The kind of love that God shows in this action is almost crushing.  So this Lent I am trying to recognize the wrongdoing, iron it out of my life and truly accept the fact of God’s enormous and unfathomable love.
Jane Haproff

March 22, 2023 – Wednesday
Hump day.  The week is half over.  There is something hopeful, something good built into the idea of “half over”.  When doing any repetitious tasks that require counting, such as certain kinds of exercises, and I get to the halfway mark I feel happy because I’m “nearly done”.  Of course I’m not…there is just as much ahead of me as there was behind me. It just feels that being on the down side of something is less arduous than the beginning of a task. The Church recognizes this and gives us Laetare Sunday which we celebrated last week, and is just a bit over the halfway mark of Lent .  We “Rejoice!” because we are drawing closer to the joy of Easter.  It is a reminder that even though we will soon walk through the horror of Good Friday, the joy and hope of Easter Sunday is close.  It’s also a gentle reminder that there is still time for me to make good on those Lenten intentions!
Jane Haproff

March 23, 2023 – Thursday
The Holy Thursday liturgy that we will soon celebrate is my favorite liturgy of the year.  It gives me a much deeper experience of Eucharist because it connects its two essential ingredients:  bread of life and service.  I am not only blessed by and fed with the Body of Christ, but I am also given the example of Jesus serving his disciples in a real hands-on manner.  David and I recently attended a day of continuing education for deacons that focused on Eucharist.  According to Fr. John Baldovin, S.J. sacraments reveal to us who God is.  And Jesus reveals himself as God who empties himself of all privilege, first by becoming man, then modeling for us un intimate example of service by washing another’s feet which could be a distasteful job.  In Eucharist bread and wine are transformed into Jesus, who then transforms me.  So adoration of the Eucharist is not enough.  I must be aware that I become what I eat and follow Jesus’ example of service.  Eucharist gives me a mission and impels me to it:  to pour myself out for the world in service no matter how distasteful or boring the job might be.
Jane Haproff

March 24, 2023 – Friday
The Fridays of my youth were meat free year-round, not just during Lent. The sacrifice inherent in abstaining from meat was overshadowed for me by the fact that I liked most of those meatless meals the best.  My mother was a brilliant woman who did not like to cook!  So we had a regular rotation of macaroni and cheese baked in the oven with a crispy top, fish sticks, and tuna casserole topped with potato chips.  Meatless Fridays were also recognized by the culture at large, where every restaurant or café served clam chowder.  Those Fridays marked us as Catholic in a way that did not occur on any other day.  It was a sign of who we were:  Catholic with all that entails.

I often wonder what marks me as noticeably Catholic in the culture these days.  Ashes on Ash Wednesday do, but that is a once-a-year identity.  What sets me apart from the culture every other day of the week?  And aren’t I supposed to be set apart, in the world but not of it? Aren’t I supposed to be an embodiment of Christ today?  Or at least an example of Him? As I ask myself these questions I remind myself that I try to make everything I am and do be for Him. And He will do with it what he wishes. The rest is just ego.
Jane Haproff
 
March 25, 2023 – Saturday

These days it’s difficult to separate Saturday and Sunday.  It’s all under the category of weekend.  Saturday used to be the day we went to confession. Bless me Father for I have sinned…Sunday was the day of worship, of going to Mass.  Because my Dad worked nights, when we went to Mass as a family it was always the latest Mass on Sunday which at that time was noon.  However, I often went to the nine o’clock Mass with friends; school children were encouraged to attend this Mass.  In each case though, Mass was on Sunday.  Then came some of the liturgical changes that allowed for an evening vigil Mass and lots of options opened up.  I still remember the first Holy Thursday evening vigil Mass I attended in 1956.  As I was coming down from the choir loft to receive Communion in a darkened Church lit by candles I thought this was the most beautiful and mystical experience.  Mass at night, darkness when we emerged from the Church!  And now the Saturday evening vigil is my regular Mass.  I no longer connect it to something mysterious.  It is the focus of my week and I like the way that it feels connected to the Jewish idea of the Sabbath, sundown to sundown.  Shalom and may we carry the peace of Christ with us.
Jane Haproff 

March 26, 2024 – Sunday

Today would have been my oldest sister’s birthday.  The treatment she was undergoing for her cancer thirty years ago was very different from what is available today.  She was sick, bedridden and depressed for most of a year.  I gave her a guided meditation that suggested picturing the most beautiful place one could imagine such as mountains, seashores, etc.  My sister told me she pictured herself laying at the foot of the altar.  Her death was one of the greatest losses I have experienced. 

Today’s gospel recounts the story of Lazarus, a dear friend of Jesus and the brother of Mary and Martha.  When Jesus arrives in the village Lazarus has been dead four days.  Two things happen that speak to me:  when Jesus sees those close to Lazarus weeping, he becomes “deeply troubled” and when he approaches the tomb he weeps.  When I think of all the indignities and rejections that Jesus suffers, the torture and the violent death he endures, he never weeps.  What moves him to tears is the suffering of his friends and the loss of Lazarus.  Somehow that image of Jesus weeping over another’s death is very comforting to me.  And then he raises Lazarus from the dead, providing him and his family and friends a few more years together and prefiguring the idea of a final resurrection!  And then Jesus promises that final resurrection to us all.  I think of my sister laying at the foot of the altar…knowing it is not the end.  Alleluia
Jane Haproff

Reflections for Mar. 13-19, 2023

March 13, 2023—Learn to Pray When You Are Well

In The Gift of Peace, Joseph Cardinal Bernardin, the former Archbishop of Chicago, shared his personal reflections on the last three years of his life before his death in 1996.  His reflections covered the false accusations of sexual misconduct, his diagnosis of cancer, and the return of the cancer following 15 months of remission.  I’ve read his book several times and have always found it inspiring.

In one reflection, Cardinal Bernardin opens up about his prayer life, and shares how difficult it is to pray when you are sick.  Perhaps his reflections resonated with my own struggles in prayer, especially during my recovery from a hip fracture in 2017 and an infection in 2019 resulting from overnight surgery to debride extra bone that grew back around my new left hip.

My best prayer teachers were the Sisters of St. Joseph of St. Augustine (Florida).  As a young boy they taught me to pray using the acronym, ACTS.  A=Adoration, C=Contrition, T=Thanksgiving, and S=Supplication (i.e., petitions for others).  While I’m hopeful that my prayer life has evolved, I’ve never forgotten ACTS, and have come back to it when I struggle with my own prayer.

Cardinal Bernardin shared this message with respect to his prayer during the challenges he faced in the last years of his life: Learn to pray when you are well.  I heartily endorse this message!
Bob Leathers

March 14, 2023—Agnes: Part 1—When All Else Fails, Have Faith

Early this year, one of my wife’s closest girlfriends lost her mother, Agnes, at the age of 90.  I was honored to assist at her funeral mass in Southern California in February and preach the homily.  Over 125 family and friends came together to celebrate her life and new life in Christ.

I first met Agnes in the early 2000s, and Cindy and I were honored that she attended our wedding in 2006.  Agnes impressed me with her deep Catholic faith.  Her faith sustained her during her darkest days.  Agnes loved children and she raised three of them.  But she also had six other pregnancies which resulted in miscarriages.  I can imagine Agnes offering hope to someone who was struggling with their faith by simply saying, “When all else fails, have faith.”

I was also impressed with Agnes’ humility.  Over 20 years ago, with the support and encouragement of another family member, Agnes embraced and accepted mental health support that she had needed for a number of years.  And during the last few years of her life as she lived more passively, Agnes accepted help by making space in her home for a live-in caregiver.

Agnes learned to accept life as it came and surrender control over many things.  It’s the way of life that Jesus offers us, however difficult it may be and whatever sacrifices it may involve, confident that to accept it is the ultimate way to peace and happiness.

When all else fails, have faith.
Bob Leathers

March 15, 2023—Agnes: Part II—"In All Circumstances, Give Thanks”

Following Agnes’ funeral mass, a reception was held and one of Agnes’ children got up to thank everyone.  It was remarkable.  Almost everyone was thanked by name and for what they had done for Agnes.

Then one family who were neighbors to Agnes’ daughter got up to speak.  The family had moved to California from the Midwest a number of years ago, and their daughter grew up with Agnes’ grandchildren.  When Grandparents’ Day was celebrated at the local elementary school, the family’s daughter had no one to invite because her grandmother lived in the Midwest.  So she invited Agnes to attend as her “adopted” grandmother. 

I think Agnes would have been proud, because her family, including extended family and friends, were her greatest joy, and she was a blessing to all of them.  Ron Rolheiser, OMI, a well-known speaker and author, wrote that to bless someone is to speak well of that person, to take delight in that person, and in some way, to give up some real life for that person.  Agnes raised her three children as a single parent.  She didn’t have much but made sure her children had everything they needed.  She also blessed children from around the world.  She worked at a language institute, where she met students from all over the world and hosted several of them in her home.  And she earned the title of “adopted grandmother,” too!

As St. Paul tells us, “Rejoice always. … In all circumstances, give thanks.”
Bob Leathers

March 16, 2023—Interpersonal Relationships

The other day, I stumbled across notes from my deacon retreat the year I was ordained.  One talk centered on several virtues of interpersonal relationships.

Here's what I captured:

Sacrifice.  To be human involves sacrifice.  Unless you know what it means to sacrifice deeply for others, you have not lived. 

Judging Others.  In this passage from Jesus’ Sermon on the Mount (Matthew 7:1-5), Jesus says: Do not judge and you will not be judged. 

It is so easy for me to make judgments about others.  It seems like a human thing to do because I make judgments all the time. I wonder why Jesus tells us not to judge.  Perhaps it is a means of control.  It’s a mystery of why we see evil or the bad in others and want to deal with it by exercising power, and it can be a difficult cycle to break. But there is another kind of judgment that involves choosing between two or more, often good, options.  This form of judgment is better known as discernment.

Forgiveness.  God’s forgiveness is fundamentally different than human forgiveness.  Unforgiveness is a poison, while God’s forgiveness is extravagant.  The fruit of forgiveness is that it transforms and renews relationships.  In forgiving ourselves we in turn have the capacity to forgive another.

Lord, this Lent, help me to sacrifice more joyfully, stop judging others, prayerfully be more discerning, and forgive more.
Bob Leathers

March 17, 2023—It’s St. Patrick’s Day!  Green Beer, Anyone?

• There are two kinds of people in the world:  The Irish and those who wish they were.  On St. Patrick’s Day, everyone is Irish, but only if you wear green!  And if you don’t, you might be pinched.

 

• Often, when St. Patrick’s Day falls on a Friday, like this year, the Bishop grants a dispensation so we can eat meat, or more specifically, Corned Beef, along with green beer.

I can only wonder whether St. Patrick would be amused at some of the St. Patrick’s Day customs we celebrate in the U.S.  St. Patrick probably liked to celebrate, but might wish we enhance our remembrance of his day with a few spiritual practices.  “Prayer, scripture and evangelization were real hallmarks of his life.” (from Miracles of the Saints).

St. Patrick, known as the Apostle to Ireland, prepared 21 years for his mission in Ireland. He acquired practical wisdom needed to teach the Gospel of Christ.  Legend has it that he used 3-leaf shamrocks to teach the Trinity. 

In his writings, St. Patrick admitted to spiritual apathy, losing some of the Spirit’s fervor within him from his more youthful days.  St. Patrick can be a hopeful sign to all of us who feel some of our youthful passion has cooled.

St. Patrick employed miracles over the magic of druids (pagan priests who dominated the Irish with their magic) to convert the Irish.  In 12 years, Ireland had been converted from paganism to Christianity.  Not bad for a few miracles.
Bob Leathers

March 18, 2023—The Annunciation

I keep an icon of the Annunciation of the Lord to Mary by the Archangel Gabriel on the wall in my home where I usually pray.  In a few days, March 25^th to be exact, we pause during Lent to celebrate this feast.  (Apologies if I’m stealing next week’s meditation for this feast day)!

The gospel reading on the Annunciation (St. Luke’s gospel) has taught me to expect the unexpected and unforeseen circumstances in my plans.  If I expect them to unfold as I want them to, then I’ll be frustrated because they will rarely happen the way I want them to.  I sometimes wonder if the problems in life are disguises for the entertainment that God gives us!  In some little ways, this Lent has taught me to trust the reality created by God more than my plans.  The most unforeseen event is that Christ was born as a human being and that he is made real in the Eucharist.
Bob Leathers


March 19, 2023—Solemnity of St. Joseph

Sunday always trumps a saint’s feast day, even St. Joseph.  So this year, we celebrate his feast tomorrow.

When I made my Confirmation (back then, in the 4^th grade), I selected Joseph as my patron.  I still have the statue given me as a gift. 

Matthew’s gospel tells us that Joseph was a just man, one who was completely open to all God wanted for him.  But Joseph was in a pickle because he found, Mary, his betrothed, pregnant.   According to the law, it was his right to expose her for this adulterous act.  But enlightened by an angel, Joseph sees that the only way to preserve Mary’s honor would be to bring Mary into his home and adopt the child as his own.  He shifts his focus away from his rights and shows empathy to Mary.  Later in Matthew’s gospel, Jesus teaches that one must go beyond what the law requires in order to truly fulfill it. 

God’s plan surprises constantly if I allow myself to be surprised. To do this, I need the ability to hear the voice of our empathetic God, something difficult to do with all the demands on our time.  When I pause to listen attentively I can create the space for God to be with me.  The same challenges and frustrations are still there, but God is with me—and walks with me to help, guide and bear them.  And perhaps this is the biggest surprise of all!

Happy Feast Day!

Bob Leathers

Reflections for Mar. 6-12, 2023

March 6, 2023 - Asking for Forgiveness
A Facebook friend of mine was recently diagnosed with Esophogeal Cancer Adrinocarcinoma and had to have an emergency c-section with her 8^th child to remove the tumor larger than the baby and another tumor in her bowel tract.  Upon removing the tumor and further review, she received the tragic news of a terminal diagnosis with less than 6 months to live.  She has been quite “vocal” on Facebook asking for prayers and intentions.  As I watch her move through the stages of grief and dying, I am reminded of the stage of “seeking mercy”.  She boldly reached out to anyone she may have offended, or caused any harsh feelings in, or whomever she may have been a bad example to – she asked for their forgiveness and mercy.  Typically, when I seek forgiveness, it is for the bigger of the sins as outlined in the 10 commandments.  I was struck by her need to get into the most minuscule details of her life such as causing scandalous thoughts, being a bad example, encouraging another to sin through word or action, etc.  It made me realize that seeking mercy is necessary not just in the big things but even in the simple areas that I can rationalize away; after all I am not in control of another’s reactions or sin.   Her complete submission to God’s will during her life is an inspiration to me and I pray for her continued strength in mind, body, and soul.   May I too seek mercy in the ways Sarah has inspired me.                                                                                                      Bianca Hennager

March 7, 2023 - Being My Own Cheerleader
In reviewing today’s readings, I can relate to the Pharisees.  Who doesn’t like a little praise and validation and honor bestowed upon them from other people? In the case of the Pharisees, they thought they were doing everything right.  I struggle with this sentiment and recognize that I might react this when I am looking for validation of a job well done.  How disappointed I become when I’m not recognized in the ways or in the timeframe I had expected!  I am working on an internal dialogue that I have with myself when I reach a goal or an accomplishment.  I make it  part of my dialogue with God to turn inward versus outward.  I thank God for giving me the strength, the patience and/or the ability to complete my goals.  In becoming my own cheerleader and not looking outward for validation, I have become more content and joy filled.  To be my own cheerleader doesn’t mean everything is perfect or that I don’t like to hear words of affirmation. Those things are still great, but they are not longer expected.   I am learning to lessen the negative dialogue in my head and see the beauty of speaking kindness to myself.                                                Bianca Hennager

March 8, 2023 - In Service to Others
Recently I was talking to my oldest son, a freshman in college, as he was explaining that he was at a transitional place in his life and did not have a lot of “joy.”  Of course my mother’s heart wants only the best for him and to hear him struggling in his current phase of life was difficult.  When discussing with him what may be at the root at his lack of joy, it became increasingly obvious to me that he wasn’t doing anything to bring joy into his life.  He has a solid routine of classes, work, surface level encounters with acquaintances, and going to the gym.  All these things are great things to do to lead a structured routine life, but there wasn’t anything pulling him towards being in service to someone or something else.  Often when I am emotionally in a rut or feeling “joyless” I find that it is because I am too focused on myself, my surroundings, my life, etc.  I explained that not all of us can go far away and live a missionary life of service.  I imagine if someone can do that, they have a lot of joy amidst the trials of living in a different culture and seeing how other people in the world live.  But there are smaller ways we can be of service.
Together my son and I brainstormed some ideas on how he can be in service to others whether it is in college or within the community where he lives.  He is a great musician and basketball player. I explained he could teach guitar or coach a kids’ basketball team.   When we serve others, it helps us gain perspective and allow joy to come into our lives.  Seeing another person smile or laugh because of how we are in service to them is the best joy there is.                                                                                                                Bianca Hennager

March 9, 2023 - A Dog’s Life
A little more than a year ago we adopted a stray dog that a friend of mine found at the local landfill.  This beautiful German Shepherd puppy was almost 1 year old and had been out on her own for a while.  You could see her ribs and she had a “scrapper’s” personality.  You could tell she was used to scavenging for her food and the comfort of living indoors was not something she was used to.  I immediately connected with her, and we brought her back to our busy house.  At times this new puppy of ours was draining in her incessant need to be loved on, fed, and played with.  When working from home she became quite a distraction for me, joining zoom calls at the most inopportune time because she wanted to play ball or to give kisses.  I often had to put her outside of my room and shut the door on her.  She didn’t hide her sad face and her loud sigh as she slumped right outside my door.  Wailing would occur if the separation went on longer than she wanted. 
When I meditated on today’s gospel I was reminded of how Lazarus begged like a dog; begging for scraps and or attention; begging to be noticed really.  In contrast, I am reminded of how my puppy loves me unconditionally despite being put out or shunned when it’s inconvenient to pay attention to her.  It made me wonder how many times have I consciously or unconsciously shunned other people because it was inconvenient, or I was too busy?                                                                                                                            Bianca Hennager

March 10, 2023 - Sibling Rivalry
In a large family there is bound to be some sibling rivalry.  My two oldest sons are less than 13 months apart and are night and day in personality.  One son is highly introverted, more cerebral and has a small cluster of friends; the other son is quite social, athletic, and dramatic.  They complement each other so well and when they can work together, they can accomplish great feats.  However due to the differences in their personalities, sibling rivalry sparks at times.  One will say the other is favored and vice versa.  As a parent I can appreciate the different gifts and talents God has bestowed on my children; however, my children can turn it into a competition.  I try to intercede and explain that one sibling’s gift is not a deficit of the other – and that it is okay to have different gifts and talents.  How blessed we are that we are not all the same – life would be quite boring! 
I am reminded of sibling rivalry in the first reading today where the sons of Jacob were jealous of their brother Joseph and left him to be sold to the Ishmaelites.  The extent of their jealousy and being insecure with the gifts they had must have been extensive.  I pray for my children, that their relationship blossoms so that they can see the beauty in their differences and not feel jealousy and insecurity because of them.    Bianca Hennager

March 11, 2023 - Forgiveness
In today’s Gospel of the Prodigal Son I am reminded of God’s unceasing mercy and unconditional love despite my actions.  When I am truly repentant much like the younger son, God welcomes me back into his arms and metaphorically slaughters the fattened calf to celebrate my return.  As I look back on my years as a young adult, there were plenty of times when I was arrogant in my beliefs, thinking I would be able to do things “better”, believing the famous saying: “when I become a parent I will do things differently” mantra.  I was in my mid-twenties with small children when I had a kind of “ah-ha” moment with my mom.  I remember apologizing to her for all the grief I had caused as a strong-willed child, my arrogance in believing I was doing things “better”, and my temper.  She smiled and was quite loving in her response, recognizing that I was seeking forgiveness.  Of course, she recognized right away that I too have strong willed children and I too would one day be in the position of the Father loving my children unconditionally when their arrogance and/or temper gets in the way.  As my children become young adults, I can fully appreciate the unconditional love and joy a parent has when children come full circle recognizing and seeking that unceasing love from their parent.                                                                                                              Bianca Hennager

March 12, 2023 - Helpless
A few years ago while in Monterey, someone stole my purse right in front me while I was talking to another individual.  I remember hearing the car alarm sound, visually seeing the car, and not thinking much of it.  Towards the end of the day when we were packing up, I couldn’t find my purse.  I panicked and was sure it was stolen.  My heart sank and I felt so helpless in that moment.  I had no money for gas or food.  How was I to get home?  How was I to handle all the responsibilities of getting a new driver’s license, contacting credit card companies, etc.  It seemed so overwhelming and there was my son looking to me for guidance; I was lost.  I remember saying to the lead organizer, “How am I to get home?  I feel so helpless.”  Without even giving it a second thought, he took out his wallet and gave me $100.  I was shocked and relieved as now I could focus on getting myself and my son home safely.  The other items and responsibilities could wait for another day. 
In retrospect, I now see God working so often through others and in nature when I feel helpless.  Lord, I pray that when I feel helpless, I remember to look to you and know you are there. There is no need to feel helpless as you have sustained me yesterday, today, and will sustain me in the future.                                        Bianca Hennager

Reflections for Feb. 27-March 5, 2023
February 27, 2023 - The 40 Day Challenge
There is a reoccurring theme throughout scripture that is hard to miss the more you read the bible. It is marked by the number 40, that signifies a time of challenge and hardship, followed by transformation. The example that immediately comes to mind is Jesus’ time in the dessert before he started his public ministry. During this time he was hungry, isolated, and tempted by the devil. Jesus knew that he was going to suffer and ultimately die and the human nature in him caused fear, doubt, and temptations that he knew he must face. The faith traditions he grew up in had stories of great men and prophets that had experienced these 40 days of challenges and preparation.  And he knew that he must experience these things on his own.
This is what Lent is signaling for me to do every year in the context of our culture and challenges. During the 40 days, I am asked to reflect on what separates me from God. I can do this by abstaining from things that may be problematic in my life; maybe social media, alcohol, shopping, or any number of things that take me away from my faith and Him. But I can act against these things through service, penance, prayer, empathy, and compassion for others. By the end of the 40-day journey I can celebrate the resurrection, transformation and be fully ready for God in my life.
Jen Payan

February 28, 2023 - Heaven
Recently a nurse friend of mine shared a sweet interaction that she had with her young daughter. She had arrived home after a difficult day at work in which one of her patients, a very sick infant, had passed away. She was sad but was open with her daughter, explaining that her tiny patient had died, trying to explain that very tragic things happen, but that she takes comfort knowing that the infant was with God now and no longer suffering. Her daughter contemplated this for a moment and said, “I bet Grandma is going to love holding that little baby and taking care of her in heaven.” My friend’s heart burst with the thought of her mother in law, who had passed a few years back, snuggling and enjoying the beautiful newborn. Her daughter brought her much comfort with this thought and also reminded her of what eternal life with Christ offers us. Heaven is where we are with our God and there is no pain or suffering, only peace, comfort and joy. This is something that children seem to have no problem understanding, thank goodness they are around to remind us!
Jen Payan

March 1, 2023 - Your Happy Place
Have you thought recently about where your happy place is? I know when my children were small the answer was simply the bathroom where I could get a solid 5 minutes to myself! On a more serious note, asking that question really helps me reflect on what brings true contentment. A happy place can be a location or an activity. For example, if you said the beach, why? Is it the sun, the sound of the waves, children’s laughter, or just a break from daily routines that bring you peace and happiness? Maybe it is your kitchen where you enjoy cooking. Are you enjoying the smell and tastes of the food or providing a nice treat for those around you? Is it the gym, fishing on a lake, sitting in a coffee shop reading a book, walking with a friend?
 
We each have individual needs, interests, and things that bring us joy. I think it is important to reflect on this. The outside influences of the world often try to tell us what our happy place should be, for example, expensive vacations and material goods. But when I reflect on my true happy place I often find it simple, involving my own gifts, interests and the special people in my life. God’s gift to me is that “happy place.”
Jen Payan

March 2, 2023 - Waiting in Anticipation
Over the holiday I found myself in the baggage claim at the airport  waiting for my college daughter to arrive. My eyes were glued to the escalator looking for her familiar smile, wearing her favorite travel sweatpants, college hoodie, and backpack. Since it was the holiday season, I noticed many others waiting for their loved ones in anticipation. There was a man with two little girls holding flowers and there was a group of teens with their moms’ holding signs with messages and hearts drawn on them. There was a man with a cowboy hat in muddy boots and a middle-aged couple holding a fuzzy pink baby blanket. I started trying to picture who each group was anticipating. Since my daughter was delayed after the landing, I was able to witness each reunion. They welcomed their mom, cousin, son and grandbaby with hugs and such joy! It was so fun to watch.

Isn’t this how God must feel waiting for us? Especially when we have been away for a while? For those of us who may think we have been away too long or may not be worthy of his love, I’m reminded of those reunions I witnessed that evening. I know my heart burst with joy when I finally spotted her coming down the escalator. I’m sure God will have a similar response to our return!
Jen Payan

March 3, 2023 - Out of Gas
My legs and arms were shaking, and sweat was dripping into a pool underneath me. That’s it, I thought, I’m done, I can’t hang on any longer, I’m out of gas. Then I heard voices of encouragement around me. “you got this Jen” and “you are looking strong!” My gym buddies surrounded me. Really, I look strong? Maybe I can hold on a little longer. I ended up accomplishing more that I ever thought I could with the support of some very special people.

How many times have you run out of gas, whether it was physically, spiritually, or mentally? You simply lose the energy to keep moving forward. Then someone comes along, lifts you up and helps you find your own strength. I need to treasure those who provide that support in my life and reflect on how I can play that role in others’ lives as well. It is one of the greatest gifts we can give each other and a direct reflection of what our God does for us every day.
Jen Payan

March 4, 2023 - Right Place Right Time
Many years ago, I walked my daughter to a neighbor’s house for a play date. We arrived at a chaotic scene. Her friend’s grandfather waved us in quickly and said they needed help. Her mother held the little 4-year-old brother on the couch.  He was limp, dusky colored, and not breathing. The mother was paralyzed with fear and didn’t know what to do. I quickly took the little boy, laid him on the floor and opened his airway. He took a few shallow breathes while I checked his pulse. I reassured mom and grandpa that he was starting to breathe again and had a good heart rate. By the time the ambulance arrived, his color had improved and he was starting to wake up.  We assumed it was a seizure. They accompanied him to the hospital while I watched the shaken little girls.

The following day the family showed up on my doorstep with an angel necklace to thank me. I was very touched. I hadn’t saved his life; I just had provided comfort and reassurance during a very scary event.  Not only had God put me in the right place at the right time, but he also knew how my strengths were going to help that family. I try to remember this when people come into my life during difficult times. They have been chosen by God, who knows the gifts and talents they possess that will help me. He will always send an “angel” at the right time to support me.
Jen Payan

March 5, 2023 - God’s Choice
When we were in the market for a new home for our growing family, we had so much coming at us. We were searching for the house, neighborhood, and schools that my children would be growing up in. It was overwhelming, I prayed we would find the perfect fit.  After many offers, we were finally able to go into contract with a home I fell in love with. I was even measuring rooms for furniture when something went wrong, and the contract was cancelled. I prayed for resolution to the problem so we could have that home, but it never happened.

Shortly after that, a home came on the market that fit all our needs. Our offer was accepted, and the transaction went smoothly. On move in day we were greeted by friendly neighbors that became close friends. Our kids played in the cul-de-sac while we had impromptu potluck dinners on our front lawn. We shared childcare and carpools.  Our neighborhood was our little “village” for the next 15 years as our children grew. It was the perfect fit.

I believe God chose that neighborhood for us. I’ve taken this experience with me. Now when things seem not to be going my way or my family faces disappointments, I truly believe in putting it in God’s hands. I try to pray not for what I want but for what God thinks is best for me. He always gets it right.
Jen Payan

Reflections for Feb. 20-26, 2023

February 20, 2022 - Lent:  from Feast to Fast
We are about to embark on a spiritual journey that prepares us for the greatest of all Christian celebrations: Easter.  I remember from the days of my childhood the tenets of Lent.  You had to give up something that meant something to you such as no-meat Fridays, no movies, no celebrations, etc. In short, it was a time to abstain from all things fun and tasty. Also, there were ashes on your forehead, confessions, and purple cloth covering every statue in church.  It was later in life that I learned of the significance of these rituals and the deeper meaning behind them.  And it was years before I immersed myself in the true spirit of what Lent was all about.  Of course, repentance was the most important part, but it was also a time of looking forward.  It was a time of really listening to, and putting into practice the teachings of our religion.  Lent, to me, is a time of great personal awakening and inner conversions of the heart.  Instead of giving something up, Lent, became a time of giving of yourself to help others.  Instead of walking around in sackcloth and ashes, you became a beacon of light, helping others by your actions.  And internally, you dove into renewing our baptismal commitment and bringing yourself closer to God.
Lent marks the beginnings of Jesus’ ministry.  40 Days in the desert, resistance to the temptations of the devil, and embarkation on a ministry that would change the world, and culminate in an Easter that would put a conclusion to the old, and fulfillment in the new.
Don Eagle

February 21, 2022 - Shrove Tuesday — Mardi Gras
Shrove Tuesday. Mardi Gras. Carnival.  All words associated with the beginnings of Lent.  Shrove Tuesday is from the old English term “shrive,” which means to hear one’s confession and declare freedom from sin.  It was a term that was the kickoff to Lent, and became known as Shrove Tuesday, or the day before Ash Wednesday— a day of atonement.   Mardi Gras (French) or “Fat Tuesday” referred to the culmination of feasting before the fast, abstinence and penitence of Lent.  Carnival (Latin— from the word carnivore) ) was the putting away of flesh (eating meat) as part of an annual celebration involving parades, music, and festivity. Ash Wednesday became a sign of the whole church putting itself through penance as symbolized by the placing of ashes upon the head, an Old Testament sign of grief and mourning.  It marks the beginning of the Lenten season, 40 days dedicated to reflection, prayer and fasting ahead of Easter.
I liken the soul to a tree in autumn. I think of Lent as turning over a new leaf each day during the 40 days prior to Easter. I have often thought of a tree of such leaves —purple on one side, white on the other, and of turning over one leaf each day during Lent.
“As each of the days of lent unfolds towards the promise of Easter, we are challenged to turn over a new leaf in our lives through positive Christian actions.  And as our leaves are turned each day, we carry out the commandment to love one another. So at Easter, our souls, as well as our tree, will welcome the Resurrection clothed in dazzling white.”
Don Eagle

February 22, 2022 – Ash Wednesday
I have two favorite poems:  the first, by Christina Rosetti, gives a beautiful description of the wind,  which to me, is interchangeable with a description of the Holy Spirit.
            “Who has seen the wind?
            Neither you nor I.
            But when the trees bow down their heads,
            The wind is passing by.”
            
The second, by David Melton, speaks to a generational love between parent and child.           
            “Take my hand, my child
            and we will explore the land.
            I will tell you all that I know
            and you will show me the secrets of the heart.
            It may not be a fair exchange,
            but it Is all that I have to give.”

As we embark upon the 40 days of Lent, I am reminded of Jesus’ 40 days in the desert prior to his ministry, the wanderings of the Israelites for 40 years before the arrival at the promised land, and the 40 days that Jonah spent  among the Ninevites speaking repentance.  Our church today invites us to fast, to abstain, to turn over a new leaf in anticipation of Easter, and the promise of redemption and eternal life.  I have been through many, many Lenten seasons (I won’t say HOW many), and early on gave up candy and movies in order to make some sacrifice regarding Lent.  Today, I find it in my heart not so much to give up, as to get up and perform positive acts. Get up and embrace the Holy Spirit, and proclaim acts of kindness, grace, mercy and humility.
Don Eagle

February 23, 2022 - Modern Day Saints
Somehow I think that the feast of All Saints is misplaced.  From the obscure placement on our church calendar in November, I think it might be beneficial to honor those saints during Lent.  In professing their faith, many of them died as martyrs.  In performing outstanding service to the tenets of our faith, they served humanity.  Lent is a time of spiritual reflection.
According to the Delaney Dictionary of Saints there are approximately five thousand such men, women and children who have — in the eyes of the church — become holy.  Whether it is St. Francis of Assisi, St. Teresa of Avila, or St. Teresa of Calcutta there are saints who have become recognized as patrons of every sport, job, or even country. The pages of history spell out the lives of ordinary people who have given of themselves in order to live out their faith to help their fellow creatures.
To me, there ought to be a connection between Lent and the examples of the saints. For it is in study that we learn of faith.  And who better to explain faith than a Saint?  What better time to immerse  oneself in the lives of practitioners of the faith?  Who better to follow the example of holy actions than someone who has done exactly that?
I think I’ll find me a nice quiet place and each day examine the lives of a few saints and see how these normal people professed their faith.  It should be a nice adjunct to fasting and abstinence.
Hmmm. Perhaps I’ll start with Brendan, Patron Saint of sailors.
Don Eagle


February 24, 2022 - Benedict XVI
At the end of 2022, we lost  Pope Benedict the Sixteenth.  To Catholics everywhere, the passing of Benedict the sixteenth was expected yet sad.  Before becoming Pope in 2005, Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger of Germany rose through  Vatican offices to become a trusted right-hand of Pope John Paul II, and was considered to be a conservative.  His mission was to keep the church on goal with basic teachings.  His shyness and subsequent pastoral visits limited him to few travels, Yet he was a popular pontiff.  His greatest contribution was his magisterium (teaching authority of the Church.) His catechesis, encyclicals on central aspects of the faith and biographies on Jesus of Nazareth were exceptional.   He handled his office skillfully, but as he grew older he summoned the courage to retire, an action that was unheard of for over 600 years.  Benedict realized the need for a younger Pope who could handle the many and complicated issues facing the modern world.  As he retired he took the title of Pope Emeritus and lived within the Vatican.  He was highly intellectual, and authored several books. His funeral drew some fifty thousand people, and, with the tools of modern communication we were able to witness his burial in the vaults beneath St. Peter’s.  It was a solemn and fitting closure to his reign.  His intellect and influence shall continue to be felt as he will likely be remembered as one of history’s great popes. 

Though this reflection is not about a personal spiritual reflection, it is in my heart to salute a great Pope with the words “Requescat in Pace”
Don Eagle

February 25, 2022. - Walking the Walk
A few weeks ago my wife and I attended the Parish Mission.  There were certainly a lot of take-aways from the talks given by Fr. Brendan, but one term kept coming back to me, and that was “pivot point.”  I believe that all of us have multiple pivot points in our lives, most of them occurring in our adulthood.  Marriage, jobs, children, school, extraordinary epiphanies, and on and on.  These pivot points indicate a change in direction.  Many of our parishioners have experienced their own personal pivot points in the epiphanies experienced through the Cursillo movement.  Others have had their own pivot points through programs, experiences, and ministries offered through SS. Peter & Paul.  A particular pivot point for me was the Cursillo.  It made me aware of walking with Christ in the company of similarly-minded men and women looking for spiritual awakening and direction.  For them and for me, this pivot point became a life changer, or as most Cursillistas put it “and nothing was ever the same.” The experience was at once profound and awakening. The same can be said about other ministries as well.  For it is in helping others, study, involvement through action, and a deeper understanding of our faith that we indeed begin the walk with Christ. 
Don Eagle

February 26, 2022 - The Start of a Grand Adventure
Seems like the seasons roll around more and more swiftly.  Just yesterday we were celebrating Christmas, then comes February and Lent.  In a mere 40 days Easter will be upon us.  Then Ascension, then Pentecost then Advent and voila — it ’s Christmas again!
The clock ticks, the days pass, and generation succeeds generation. 
For some reason I thought of my maternal grandfather.  I never met him or my paternal grandfather either, for that matter.  The former passed away when I was one.  The latter died before I was born.  My maternal grandfather was full blooded Irish and he left a religious legacy that has continued to this day.  I felt his spirituality  and his religious commitment though I never met him.  He was an influencer that left me feeling that I knew him.  He was always there — in our prayers, in our hearts, and in our minds.  He left behind a sense of spiritual guidance for his family, a closeness to his faith.
He left behind two things which I have today:  His pocket watch and a two volume set on the Manual of the Roman Catholic Church, circa 1906.  The books are especially interesting because you can see the differences between pre and the post Vatican II.  The front page of volume one contains his signature —beautifully written in ink — when people knew how to write in script.  Once in a while I’ll return to that front page  just to remind me of my heritage, and the grandpa that was so influential in my own religious education.
Don Eagle

Reflections for Feb. 13-19, 2023
February 13, 2023 - Are You the One?
          I wondered recently how I would answer the disciples of John the Baptist who go to Jesus and ask,” Are you the one who is to come, or should we look for another?”    Jesus’ answer is Matthew 11:2-11.  “Go and tell John what you hear and see:  the blind regain their sight, the lame walk, lepers are cleansed, the deaf hear, the dead are raised and the poor have the good news proclaimed to them.”   I have wondered what I would say now in 2023 about whether Jesus was the one who was to come.  When I write a reflection about my life and something I have done or experienced I write because I believe that somewhere in those experiences Jesus has been present. 
          In my life you will not find the deaf hearing or the blind seeing, or lepers cleansed.  You may find an auto accident avoided, a medical problem stabilized, or an infant and mother brought safely from danger.  You might find a newly minted Catholic slightly more confident in their faith or simply a non-believer better informed.  The message Jesus gave to John’s disciples is the same message I must deliver when anyone comes and asks if Jesus is the one.    There is nothing more genuine, nothing more transformative, nothing more powerful than our own experience of God.  Begin by asking yourself as I have, “Where do I most experience God?  In what circumstance do I feel the undeniable presence of our Lord.  
Ray Frink

February 14, 2023 - His Voice
I wish I could have heard Jesus’ voice.  It is part of Jesuit spiritual tradition, when reflecting on scripture, to place oneself in the scene described.  I might be a disciple, a Jewish bystander or the person being healed, even a dispassionate Roman observer.  The goal is to fully appreciate how I might feel or react in the circumstances of Jesus life and respond to His teachings.  If I were there, if I heard Jesus’ voice, how might my life have been transformed? 
          When I think about the New Testament passages I have heard, I hear in my mind the voice of Fr. McCauley from the UCLA Newman Center.  I hear the gentle Irish lilt of Fr. Dillion, the warmth of Fr. Bony and Deacons David and Bob; the energy and insights of Fr. Mike Ritter and the expository sermons of Bishop Barron.  I hear the priests, brothers, and lay voices on the Laudate app.  When I reflect on the New Testament, I hear Erin, Janet, Cass, Mike, Rosa, Jeff, Shelley, and all the other lectors, past and present, of the 5 o’clock Sunday Mass.  In today’s media world, I hear the portrayal of Jesus by Jonathan Roumie in the recreation of Jesus‘ life, ‘The Chosen’. 
          These many voices have placed me in the scene with Jesus.  Each voice, with its unique qualities, is a different path to hearing the transformative words of Jesus’ life.  I wish I could have heard Jesus’ voice.  Perhaps I already have. Thank you.
Ray Frink

February 15, 2023 - Touch
I wondered recently how I would answer the disciples of John the Baptist who go to Jesus and ask,” Are you the one who is to come, or should we look for another?”    Jesus’ answer is Matthew 11:2-11.  “Go and tell John what you hear and see:  the blind regain their sight, the lame walk, lepers are cleansed, the deaf hear, the dead are raised and the poor have the good news proclaimed to them.”   I have wondered what I would say now in 2023 about whether Jesus was the one who was to come.  When I write a reflection about my life and something I have done or experienced I write because I believe that somewhere in those experiences Jesus has been present. 
          In my life you will not find the deaf hearing or the blind seeing, or lepers cleansed.  You may find an auto accident avoided, a medical problem stabilized, or an infant and mother brought safely from danger.  You might find a newly minted Catholic slightly more confident in their faith or simply a non-believer better informed.  The message Jesus gave to John’s disciples is the same message I must deliver when anyone comes and asks if Jesus is the one.    There is nothing more genuine, nothing more transformative, nothing more powerful than our own experience of God.  Begin by asking yourself as I have, “Where do I most experience God?  In what circumstance do I feel the undeniable presence of our Lord.  
Ray Frink

February 16, 2023 - 51%
          My wife and I have been blessed with a quality marriage for 43 years.  We reflected on this and realized that when we have disagreements, we both begin with the assumption that the other person might be right.  We did this instinctively at first and now do so intentionally.    We begin with trying to understand the others position and move from there.  I call this the 51% approach.  At the start, the other person is 51% correct.  The outcome is usually the best solution.  This approach relies on holding the others and the family’s best interest over our own.  Our solution is most often a combination of both ideas.  This is not compromise where each loses something.  It is the win-win solution.
          This idea of putting the other first and considering their position can be and has been criticized both on a personal and public level as a sign of weakness.  If I believe in my position, why should I grant the ‘opposition’ any footing?  The popular assumption is that I must prove the other wrong.  I have to win my point.  I must soundly defeat the other. 
          My wife and I both view our lives from a position of strength.  We are and have for all time been loved by God.  We are His Beloved.  When I am loved for who I am, with mercy, forgiveness, and grace as God loves me, then I surrender nothing in the 51% approach and I grow stronger as a member of the Body of Christ.
Ray Frink

February 17, 2023 - Outsized Hearts
            My two sons’ lives, though stable and rewarding now, have had rocky paths with bumps and stumbles.  There are choices they have made where I may have chosen differently.  They do not practice their faith in the same way I do. I hope and know that they turn to prayer and the sacraments during some of their darkest times.  I pray, as any parent does, that they will recognize that the grace of God is always there, Jesus is always beside them and the Holy Spirit is in their lives at all times.  Being one of their parents, I naturally wonder if I could have helped raise them differently and presumably “better”.
          One aspect about which I do not wonder is what I call their “outsized hearts”.  This is a comment on them as persons. They are kind, generous, and compassionate.  They have a strong sense of mercy and justice.  They have taken the time, given the opportunity, to hear the gospel of Jesus to feed the hungry, clothe the naked, give drink to the thirsty, and shelter the homeless.  This may take the form of defending a friend from a bully, protecting the inebriated from harm, housing the rejected, or just being good listeners. These events tell me they are listening to their hearts.  Jesus gave them the commandment to “love your neighbor as yourself”.  When asked, “Who is my neighbor?”  Jesus’ answer was “everyone”.   My sons have heard this and I am proud. 
Ray Frink

February 18, 2023 - Hope
We pray each Sunday in the Creed, “I believe in one, holy, catholic, and apostolic Church”.  That is a tall order given the condition of the world and the Church today.  I need some hope. 
I am a cradle Catholic.  I was born into a Catholic family, baptized as an infant, and received the sacraments of initiation as a child.  I have been taught by and/or worked with nuns and priests from 1^st grade through graduate school.  I am also trained as a scientist, having had two careers that involved rational, logical thinking, powered by observation, data collection, conclusions, and testing.
So where do I find hope?  I was influenced in my religious education by a French priest who lived from 1881 to 1955, Pierre Teilhard de Chardin.  Teilhard was a paleontologist, geologist, and theologian.  Those who influenced his writing were Paul the Apostle and Ignatius of Loyola.  He wanted to bring science and faith together for all of God’s children.  He was controversial during his life and after. He is now embraced by the Church and quoted by Popes Benedict and Francis in their writings. He wrote that man is evolving spiritually and socially toward a more Christ like state.  His writing gives me hope that not only can we all strive along this path, but also that the natural movement of our world, despite what we see, is to move toward Christ.  Teilhard said:  You are a spiritual being immersed in a human experience.
Ray Frink

February 19, 2023 - Who Knows?
          I have mentioned previously that the vows we used at our wedding were quoted from the Book of Ruth.  This book is rich in expressions of devotion, caring, mercy, and love.  You also know that as an OB/Gyn, I was involved in many births.  I have no knowledge of who those infants became.  I always prayed that if I gave them a good start from birth, that somehow, I helped them begin a good life. 
          In the Book of Ruth, we learn that Ruth the Moabite left her family and people and followed her mother-in-law to the land of the Hebrews. She expected to be treated as an outsider.  In contrast to her expectations, her devotion and caring brought the notice of Boaz and with it, mercy and love.  She married Boaz and they had a son, Obed who was the grandfather of King David. 
          Who knew that the devotion and caring of Ruth would ultimately bring about the birth of the King David?   Who knew that the long line of descendants of King David would be the one God chose to reveal His divine son and our savior?
          On the worst days as a physician and scientist, besides the sustaining love I have received throughout my life, one thought has helped keep me going.  That thought was simply: Who knows what good will come of an apparently insignificant act of service or goodness that I commit today?  God knows and someday He may reveal it to me.
Ray Frink




Reflections for Feb. 6-12, 2023

February 6, 2023 - Answering God’s Call: Everyone has Gifts
I wonder how often we are prevented from doing something because we doubt our own gifts... I listen to an invitation to serve or a call for help and assume someone else is better suited, more skilled, or someone else will step up. Seldom do I think, this is God calling me. Or, my community needs me, or “speak Lord your servant is listening.” I wonder what our community would be like if we all listened more carefully to God’s call.

I think I tend to think about charisms and gifts from God too narrowly. Perhaps we all think they are reserved for a special set of people—saints, but not us. I wonder if one of the greatest sins is the denial of living out who we are created to be, God's presence in me. I also think sometimes I fail to understand that God uses community, more than individuals, to do God's work. It is not about what I can do alone, but what we can do together. I do not need to save the world alone, but I do need to participate in my small piece of ushering in the Kingdom! May we listen carefully, like Samuel, to the voice of God calling us to discipleship and respond like he did, “Here I am Lord, your servant is listening.”
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio

February 7, 2023 - Answering God’s Call: Excuses We Make
I have thousands of them! They range from “I really don't have time” to “I'm not sure I agree with the philosophy of that group...” They also expose my insecurities, “I don't have that skill set” (although I've always been interested in learning about X). I am a master of excuses. “I have so many other commitments, where would I find the time?”  I realize for myself, that it takes a concerted effort to evaluate my priorities. It’s not about what I say no to, it’s about being clear about what I say yes to.  My yeses should reflect who I truly am and reflect my deepest values—my faith. I try to do a review once a year—to look at where I'm spending my time, talent and treasure, and to ask myself, does it reflect my sense of my authentic self? In other words, does it reflect my understanding of what I believe God has gifted me to do? Is it in alignment with serving the Kingdom of God?  Am I being the creation I have the potential to be?  When I am clear about what I say yes to, I don’t need excuses.  My life feels centered and in flow with God’s work in me and in the world. I am comfortable with what is mine to do, and I trust that others will also answer God’s call in them so all our small efforts will play a significant role in building up our parish community and influencing the world for the better. 
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio

February 8, 2023 - Answering God’s Call: Living Faith as Prayer and Action
Over the years I have really valued how Richard Rohr describes the foundation of his work at the Center for Action and Contemplation. Paraphrased, he says we need both prayer/contemplative practice and compassionate action for the spiritual journey. “Without action, our spirituality becomes lifeless and bears no authentic fruit. Without contemplation, all our doing comes from ego, even if it looks selfless, and it can cause more harm than good.” I find that my spiritual life and my prayer open me to God’s transforming work in me, and it is in the world that I express God’s love and transforming power through action and service.  The service, in turn, challenges me to deepening prayer.
As we focus as a parish on our individual calls to service in ministry, I ask myself where is there need in our faith community?  How do our parish ministries serve the larger community with it’s needs? What is mine to do? Another quote I love says, “Beware the faith that does not trouble the world.” Jesus challenges me to consider, how do I participate in service to God’s people, God’s creation, God’s transforming work in the world?  What is God calling me to do, and what ministries can I explore and commit to in the weeks and months to come?   What stirs my heart to action? 
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio
 
February 9, 2023 - Answering God’s Call:  Who me?
I love the stories of Jesus calling his disciples or the scriptures about God calling the prophets.  Those who are called are such a scruffy bunch—fishermen, shepherds, salt of the earth types; some are adulterers, tax collectors who work for the Roman Empire, or traitors who persecute the early Christians... not at all my image of “faithful and holy.” They are an unworthy and uninspiring bunch.  Yay!  I can relate to them… And more importantly, God doesn’t seem to judge and choose by my standards.
Flannery O’Connor has a beautiful story called Revelation In which the protagonist, Mrs. Turpin, a very self-righteous Christian, has a dream of heaven. In her dream, it is the sinner, the broken, the ugly, the lost, that make up a makeshift band of people singing off key as they march through the pearly gates and enter heaven. At the back of the line are the righteous, well-dressed Christians singing on key. What great imagery of God's unconditional love for all of us! When I reflect on this story, I think, who am I to not answer the call to serve in my unworthiness? What could be more grace-filled?  Who me?  YES, YOU!

February 10, 2023 - Answering God’s Call:  Living as a Parish Family
One of the many things that drew my husband and me to Saints Peter and Paul was seeing the involvement of so many parishioners in various ministries.  It has been my experience that this is one of the best indicators of a vibrant, faith-filled parish.  Some of the ways Vince and I have discerned how to be involved in parish life include asking ourselves, how might our unique skills and experiences be helpful to this parish community?  I’ve found it equally important to ask myself, what will bring me joy?  Where might I learn something new? How might God be inviting me to grow?  Who should I get to know better to appreciate the rich diversity of our family—a different age group, a ministry to a particular life-stage or need, or a particular social issue? Where am I being invited to expand my understanding and compassion for my neighbor?  In spiritual direction there is a tool I sometimes use that invites people to make a life map—a simple review of key areas of life. We can look at balance and find areas where we have not had the ability or commitment to spend time developing particular parts of our lives.  For example, what might I want to do to enrich my spiritual life? Or my commitment to serve my community? Do I feel the need to build relationships with people who support my faith? Where is my life out of balance? Are there commitments that take a lot of my time but don’t produce fruit?  
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio

February 11, 2023 - Answering God’s Call:  God Doesn’t Pigeon Hole Us
I think sometimes we get stuck in a rut in our parish ministry. We participate in a particular ministry for years, which is great, but we start to equate our identity with that ministry. Sometimes we relate so much with a particular ministry that it begins to look like ownership.  A ministry can start to look like it belongs to a particular person or small group, and others are not welcome. We can also create our own barriers to participation by thinking a ministry belongs to others, and we are not needed or welcome.  This doesn’t serve the ministry or our own spiritual growth. 
Ministries grow and thrive when we have both long-term, committed individuals and new blood with new perspectives and ideas. Like Pope Francis’s call for us to be a synodal Church, it reminds me to trust that the Holy Spirit guides our discernment and our work.  When I discern my call to service through prayer, I am often surprised by what surfaces as an invitation.  God is constantly calling me to grow and explore talents and passions I didn’t know I had. God also invites me to loosen my grip when I start to feel too much ownership in a ministry, and I forget who is in charge. 
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio
 
February 12, 2023 - Answering God’s Call: Who is My Neighbor?
We all know the parable about the Good Samaritan.  For me, the moral of that story was that it is the person who takes action and cares for the victim who does God's will. While of course that is true, I've also come to ponder Jesus's choice of characters in the parable and wonder what else he might have meant.  Jim Wallis wrote about this as well, and he points out that Samaritans were not “good” as far as the Judeans were concerned. They were despised foreigners, and nobody liked them. By making the Samaritan the hero in the parable, Jesus chooses the hated “other” as his example of who our neighbor is. Jesus’s parable of the Good Samaritan was meant not just to call people to service and self-sacrifice, but also to disrupt and challenge their concept of who their neighbors were and were not.  Jesus challenges me with my sense of us and them. The test of who is my neighbor is about getting outside of my clubs and listening to the lives of the ones whose experiences may have been very different from mine, who Jesus defines as my neighbor. As we look at service as a parish, who is the neighbor in the world whom we have despised or passed by?  Who needs to be welcomed into our ministries and our lives as God’s beloved?
 Renee Regacho-Anaclerio

Reflections for Jan. 30- Feb. 5, 2023

January 30, 2023 - Catholic Schools Week
This week, students across the nation in Catholic schools are celebrating Catholic Schools Week, a 49-year tradition in the United States. My four years in Catholic high school were fundamental in my personal development, as it was there that I learned to recognize my dignity as a woman made in the image of God, and I was formed in social justice. It was in Catholic high school where I developed my love for spiritual formation and my passion for participating in the liturgy. I was unfamiliar with Catholic elementary school before my daughters attended, but we are happy with how faith and education have been integrated into one experience.
Catholic school is not the path for everyone—not even all Catholics—but this week, let us celebrate the Catholic schools across the country for the faith-filled education they are providing to students of all ages, races, and religious backgrounds. Let us pray that Catholic education will remain a part of our education system and that it will be accessible to all those who wish to attend.                                             
Erin Gallawa

January 31, 2023 - Pages of God’s Word 
I walked by a man with his newspaper laid out on the table before him and it occurred to me that I rarely see anyone reading a physical newspaper anymore. There was something very nostalgic about seeing him sit there with his paper. In 2023 everything is digital. We read the news, books, assembly instructions—everything!—on a digital device! Many people even skip the reading part and instead get their information in the form of video or podcast.
In the last few years there has been a lot of excitement over Fr. Mike Schmidt’s Bible in a Year podcast. I think it is a wonderful resource that brings the Bible to all people. There are all sorts of Catholic podcasts and apps and Instagram accounts! There are so many ways that we can stay connected to our faith. But when I saw the man reading the newspaper, I immediately thought of the Bible. When is the last time I pulled out a physical copy to read, instead of just going to the Catholic Bishops website to read the digital copy?
Our faith is founded on Scripture and Tradition—both are rooted in being physically present in the Mass and touching the pages of God’s word. May I find a way to always come back to the source!                   
Erin Gallawa

February 1, 2023 - Raising God’s Children 
I do not like to fly. It makes me anxious and I am never at peace until we have safely landed at our destination. On a recent trip to Southern California, my daughter Grace took my hand without prompting and silently held on during takeoff and landing. When I asked her about it later, she said she knew those were the parts I was most scared of. What a beautiful moment to have her notice and respond with tender love.
There is something amazing about watching your children grow into themselves. As much as parents try to teach compassion and kindness, we can’t guarantee how our children will turn out. I think of God who sent us his only Son to teach us the greatest lessons about love and sacrifice, how He must hope that we will choose to follow in his path. But even God does not control what path his children will take. I like to think that when he sees us acting in a Christ-like way, that He too rejoices!                                     
Erin Gallawa

February 2, 2023 - On Like a Light
I was recently struck when I heard the common idiom “out like a light.” While I understand it references the contrast between light and darkness, on and off, when I think about it, it feels like it should actually be “on like a light.” For is it still a light when it is off?  When I think of light I think of Christ, and I do not think of Christ as ever being off. Christ is always on, always shining, always bright. Even when Jesus’ body lay in the tomb, his light was still shining from beyond the grave. The nature of light is that it makes things visible, so how can it be called light when it is turned off? Let us be on like a light, shining brightly for all to see!                                                                                                                                                             
Erin Gallawa

February 3, 2023 - The Silence of the Wind  
In the last few weeks we have witnessed so many storms. As we sat inside our home I could hear the whistling of wind through the cracks in the doors, the rustle of the trees outside, the whipping of branches hitting the house. Wind is nothing but the movement of air, but for something I cannot see or touch, wind is a pretty powerful force! After many noisy nights, I woke up in darkness one night stunned by the silence that was left in the place where the wind had once been. I wonder if this is how it felt to the disciples of Christ when he left this earth. Although he did not come as the warrior king that the Jews expected, he moved strongly about this earth making an impact wherever he went. And then suddenly he was gone, leaving a silence in his place. But just because he was gone did not mean he no longer existed. Just because he could not be heard like the wind did not mean that his presence was gone. The air still surrounds us, even when it moves in quiet and subtle ways.                                          
Erin Gallawa

February 4, 2023 - Windshield Wipers
There is such a satisfaction in windshield wipers. Obviously we need them from a safety perspective as they make it safe to drive. But I also love watching them for their rhythm and the simplicity of wiping away a blurred surface for a moment of clarity. When I am driving in heavy rain, I am often frustrated by how quickly the windshield becomes blurred, and then the wipers swipe across the glass for momentary relief.
I’ve met many people who don’t believe you need Church for a relationship with God. While it’s true that we do not need the Church to start a relationship with God, I believe we do need Mass and prayer and our community to keep that relationship in focus. I think of the windshield as my relationship with God and the rain as daily life. As I make my way through each day, the windshield becomes clouded by all the tasks, people and challenges that I encounter. When I attend Mass, engage with my community and pray, my blurry windshield is wiped clean and my relationship with God is suddenly clearer.         
Erin Gallawa

February 5, 2023 - Wet Rocks 
If you’ve ever walked near water or been outside after it rains, you’ve may have looked down to see a gorgeous, colorful rock. Perhaps you put the rock in your pocket or carried it around for a while, only to find later when it dried that it looked just like every other gray rock. I can’t tell you how many rocks I’ve picked up, only to discover later that it wasn’t what I remembered.
Wet rocks remind me a bit of being Catholic. After joyful seasons like Christmas or Easter, after transformational Sacraments, or after a particularly powerful Mass, I feel like the shiny beautiful rock. Perhaps others even see me that way from the outside! But as I move through daily life, I find that that shine starts to fade and maybe the brightness starts to dull. I am blessed that our Church invites us to keep polishing our rocks so that we can keep the shine! Through the movement of the calendar, the commitment to Mass, and participation in the Sacraments, I am always invited to be renewed and to find my beauty again. The rock doesn’t really change—it’s colors and patterns are always there, waiting to be restored.                                                                                                                                                              
Erin Gallawa

Reflections for Jan. 23-29, 2023

January 23, 20231- Details
Back in November our whole family, all 16 of us, went to Disneyland. No matter how many times I have been there the place never ceases to amaze me. You don’t feel like you are in an amusement park but in a completely different world. Disney creates such imagery that even the lines are tolerable because you have so much to look at. In the new Star Wars ride, I felt like I was actually in the movie. It made me reflect on our Catholic faith and how detailed it is. Going to Mass is also an experience for our senses. Hearing the scriptures and the songs reinforces the message being given. Praying the Our Father, the Creed, and singing the Psalms connects us all over the world to one another. Seeing the Stained glass, the Stations of the Cross, the way the church is decorated to match the meaning of the liturgical season helps to expand our understand of our faith. Smelling the incense, oils, flowers, and plants that are used during Easter and Christmas is special
Masses bring our worship to a visceral level. Feeling the touch of ourselves in making the sign of the cross or others at the sign of peace when we can have that human connection to one another. And tasting the body of Christ in the wafer and Blood of Christ in the wine nourishes our soul. Every aspect of myself is alive in the Mass but many times I do not notice it. But when I take the time, like I did in Disneyland, and am open to the experience, I find that I am in a different world. It is the world of God!
Kurt Peterson

January 24, 2023 - Caring
My mother-in-law is 92 and has some health issues. Recently she had to be admitted to the hospital. Because Kaiser did not have any rooms available, she was sent to Mercy San Juan. At Mercy they allow more than 1 visitor, so I was able to spend time with her there. I got to observe first-hand the nurses caring for her. I have always had a lot of respect for nurses, but I really got to experience how caring they are. I could tell that nursing isn’t just a career but a calling for them. The gentleness and compassion they not only showed her but also us was so appreciated. It is a very special job because they are helping people at their most vulnerable state. I know that it is not an easy job, and they can put in long hours and can get fatigued themselves, but I am so grateful for how they cared for my mother-in-law. For all of you who are thinking about becoming a nurse, it is one of the most needed professions out there. And for all of you that are nurses, we are blessed to have you there and what you do for our families is not unnoticed. Thank you for saying yes to this vocation and caring for the ones we love so much; you’ll never fully realize how much it means to us. You truly are Christ to others.
Kurt Peterson

January 25, 2023 - Spending time
One of the biggest social problems affecting the modern world is isolation, especially for those over 65 years of age. In the Netherlands almost 10% of the nation’s population of 17.8 million are over the age of 75. In 2019, Jumbo, a large Dutch supermarket, started a pilot program called Kletkassa (Chat Checkout). This is not a fast lane checkout, but a slow lane checkout. The purpose of the Kletkassa clerks is to spend time chatting with their customers as they ring up their groceries. For many of Jumbo’s customers, mainly the elderly, this may be their only outside contact. The program has been such a success that they have opened these slow lanes in 200 of their 700 stores and expect to have them in all 700 stores at some point. We live busy lives, and we are constantly on the move.  From time to time I remind myself to stop moving on to the next thing and take the time to interact with others. When I do, not only do they feel better, I feel better too. We always see examples of Jesus speaking to the lonely, the hurting and the outcast. However, even Jesus got caught up in the hurriedness. In Mark 5:21-45 when Jesus was moving through the crowds trying to get past them, a woman touched his cloak. When Jesus felt the energy leave him, he turned around and asked who touched his garment. The woman came up to him and falling on her knees told him her whole truth.  He listened and told her that her faith had healed her. She was changed by that encounter and left a different person. Though we will never heal someone like Jesus did, we are called to be Christ on earth and the time we spend with someone can make a difference in their lives. Lord, help me to see that spending time with others in conversation is a gift to them.
Kurt Peterson

January 26, 2023 - Innocence
My wife, Sarah, shared a story with me from when she was at Mass a week ago. During the offertory a family from the community brought up the gifts. Their young toddler attempted to climb the steps up to the altar. His father began to stop him but Father Bony told him to let the child continue. The toddler walked up the steps and stopped to look up at the Crucifix, he stared at it for a couple of seconds, then walked up just past the Altar in front of the risen Christ. His head slowly moved up starting at Jesus’ feet, over his hands and up to Christ’s face. There, the little boy stopped and just looked at Jesus’ face for about ten seconds, then turned around and came back to his parents. As the family walked back to their pew the little boy kept looking at the Risen Christ. While all this happened, everyone was quiet. Sarah said it brought tears to her eyes. Listening to Sarah I could just imagine how profound that moment was. Sometimes it takes the action of an innocent child to remind us of what our faith is all about. In the gospel of Matthew 19:14 Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.” This showed we are all welcomed at Mass no matter how we look or how old we are. We are so blessed to have Father Bony who welcomes children at Mass along with their noises and curiosities and he sees this not as an annoyance but a moment of learning. Lord, help me to know you and the greatness of your knowledge and still maintain the heart and spirit of a child.
Kurt Peterson

January 27, 2023 - Rain
Finally, we are getting some needed rest from the rain that has come through our area for over the last 3 weeks. The winter storms have allowed the rain to fill many of our reservoirs and the snowfall to build up our snowpack that will help us through the long dry summers where are hills turn to a golden hue. That is why we are called the Golden State. But getting too much rain or snow at once leads to flooding, failing trees, rockslides, and avalanches. These successive storms left many people without power and caused some deaths. Nature reminds us that even life-giving things like water and sun can become destructive if taken to the extreme. There are life-giving things in our own lives that can be destructive if taken to the extreme. That is why trying to strike a balance in life is important. But staying in balance does not mean that everything is equal in my life. If you have ever tried skiing or bicycling, you know your balance is achieved by managing the different tensions. Constantly adjusting is what keeps us in balance.  Dear Lord, help me to be aware when I am allowing one tension to get too great and help me adjust that tension to keep in balance.
Kurt Peterson

January 28 2023 - Wisdom from a Teddy Bear
Winne the Pooh said, “You’re braver than you believe and stronger and smarter than you think”. I underestimate my abilities all the time. I think we all doubt ourselves at times but it is human nature not to fully realize what we are capable of. But God knows what we are capable of and throughout scripture God choses ordinary common people to send his message to the world. From the prophets to the apostles, to the saints, God calls ordinary people to rise to their potential. He is calling me to my potential too. I may be thinking:  what can I do? I will try to follow the advice of Mother Theresa “Do small things with great love”. A smile, a conversation, holding the door open for someone, just being kind to one another. That is what Pooh did.
Kurt Peterson

January 29, 2023 - Simplicity
One of the greatest aspects of Jesus’ teachings from God is its simplicity. God takes all the laws and rituals and scriptures and boils it down to two commandments. Love the lord your God with all you mind, all your heart and all your soul and all your strength. And love your neighbor as yourself. As I strive to do this I am reminded of future rewards with the two words “blessed are”. To me the Beatitudes are the instruction book for how to live out the two great commandments. “Blessed are the poor in spirit” is to know that God owns everything I have, I am only a steward. “Blessed are the gentle” means that unrighteous anger and hatred can not be part of my relationship with others. “Blessed are those who mourn” is to be vulnerable to others. “Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness” means I must seek to understand God and my neighbor. “Blessed are the merciful” is for me to show the same mercy to others that Jesus showed me by dying on the cross. “Blessed are the pure in heart” means that God controls my heart and thoughts, not myself. “Blessed are the peacemakers” is not to be a push over but to help find common ground between my enemy so we can move towards a common goal. “Blessed are the persecuted” means that many will try to twist my words for their goal. And for me to understand that I will be rewarded by God not by Man. Gods message is simple but because of my human nature it is the hardest to live fully. Thank you, Jesus, for the sacrament of reconciliation that allows me to begin again when I stumble.
Kurt Peterson

Reflections for Jan.16-22, 2023

January 16, 2023 - New Wine and New Wine Skin 
“No one pours new wine into old wineskins. Otherwise, the wine will burst the skins, and both the wine and the skins are ruined. Rather, new wine is poured into fresh wineskins.” (MK 2:22) This practice preserves both the wine and wineskin. The focus here is a paradigm shift from old and traditional religious practices to embracing the person of Christ. This was a new and hard message for many of Jesus’ contemporaries. Breaking the traditions was considered to be a sin.  But new wineskins expand as  fermentation takes place. So we should constantly be renewed and expanding in our faith as we receive the new message of the Word of God and deepen our relationship with Jesus. The WORD’S new messages also transform me in him, and I grow in Jesus and with Jesus, becoming refined and like good wine over time.
Bony

January 17, 2023 - The Sabbath - Lord’s Day - Celebrating life in Christ. 
“The Son of Man is lord even of the sabbath.” (Ref. MK 2-18-28) 
Jesus was confronted by his contemporaries regarding the tradition of keeping the sabbath since his disciples broke it. His answer was, "Can the wedding guests fast while the bridegroom is with them? As long as they have the bridegroom with them, they cannot fast.” The sabbath was observed as a holy day of obligation dedicated to God. But Jesus gives a new meaning to it. 

The Catholic tradition keeps ‘Sunday’ as the Lord’s Holy day of Obligation. While I was growing up, this was a priority: a day of celebration with Jesus – learning catechism, going to church, and the only day in a week we had meat. We joyfully celebrated the day with Christ and His Community!  Growing up as a cradle Catholic in a Catholic family, this tradition of going to church was a ritual of life, thanks to my family! I later realized that this day is not just a day of obligation; it is a true day of celebration with Christ and His Community.
Bony

January 18, 2023 - WITHERED
Jesus said to the man with the withered hand, "Stretch out your hand." He stretched it out, and his hand was restored. (Ref. MK 3:1-6)
I had a classmate in my school days whose right hand was withered, but his left hand was stronger than anyone’s normal hand.  He was a great ‘kabaddi’ (kabaddi is a team sport popular in India) player and a pillar of our team. The opposite team would try to take advantage of his weakness, but other teammates covered that weak side. This example is like a call from Jesus to support the weak with our help. There is no appointed time for it; NOW is the time.

Spiritually, I feel withered when I fall into sin. Then I hear Jesus’ voice, ‘stretch out,’ ‘show me,’ and I remain open to his mercy. I am fully restored to his grace and strengthened by the power of this, His mercy.
Bony

January 19, 2023 - ‘People wanted to touch Jesus’
“He had cured many and, as a result, those with diseases were pressing upon him to touch him. (Ref. Mk 3:7-12)
People were attracted to Jesus because he healed many. There is a school for children with special needs in my home diocese in India.  Every visit there is a great experience; the children come to you to touch and hug you. They show their love to you; very expressive in their love and at the same time, I feel that they are deprived of love and attention and are looking for more love.

People touched Jesus because they wanted to be healed – physical healing and getting their needs fulfilled. And they came from beyond Israel. So also, I am called to go beyond my boundaries to touch people and share Jesus’ love, compassion, and his power of liberation.

Jesus, help my little faith and heal my body and spirit as I touch you in Holy Communion; your every touch gives me comfort in my afflictions. 
Bony

January 20, 2023 - The Apostles
“He appointed Twelve, whom he also named Apostles, that they might be with him…. (Ref. MK 3:13-19)
It was Jesus’ significant step to constitute the people of God to share His mission (NJBC) -He called people to be with Him. By baptism, we are also made part of this significant group. And as an ordained priest I am additionally called to be with him without any reservation.

After the first three years of my seminary formation, I was planning to leave my home diocese for another mission diocese in northeast India. I shared my intention with the director, Msgr. Varghese.  After listening to me, he said, “you may want to go on a mission; pray to Jesus to help you discern, to know what Jesus wants you to do.”  After prayer and discernment, I decided to remain in my home diocese and was ordained a priest for Jesus’ mission in that diocese. Jesus was telling me to be Him for His mission in my own diocese.
Bony

January 21, 2023 - Sound Minded Jesus 
“When his relatives heard of this, they set out to seize him, for they said, "He is out of his mind." (Ref. MK 3:20-21)
The relatives’ trying to restrain Jesus might be due to concern for his safety or fear of losing the family reputation or embarrassment after the growing rejection of and opposition to Jesus from leaders. It could also be due to their disbelief and not trusting him. In the eyes of humans, Jesus seems out of his mind. But Jesus was ‘clear in his mind’ regarding his mission - to do the will of the Father. 

Having lived with my grandfather, an ardent believer and a teacher, I witnessed many debates about Christianity and God with his communist friends. For them, those who followed religion were out of their minds. It might be because of his testimony that all those people later embraced Christ and were faithful Christians. The rejection of God coming from a non-believer and outside of the family of Christ can be understood. But if it comes from within the family of Christ, it is painful, which we witness these days.  They do not realize they are also members of the body of Christ. 

Jesus, strengthen me in the conviction: ‘to live is Christ and die is gain’ (Philippines 1: 21) ‘
Bony

January 22, 2023 - The Light House 
“The people who sit in darkness have seen a great light; on those dwelling in a land overshadowed by death, light has arisen. (Ref. MK 4:12-17)
There is a lighthouse on the beach in my hometown. This lighthouse was built in 1862, and since then, it has been a pointer to the ships coming to the port. Though the port has decayed, the lighthouse functions well and attracts many. The lighthouse is an icon of our town. As a child, I was delighted to look for the light rays flashing at night from my house. 
The light and the darkness are used to depict good and evil. Jesus, our perpetual light shines and enlightens every one of us. We are called to walk in the light of Christ. In the baptism ritual, we light a candle from the paschal candle, and give it to the newly baptized as we pray that they keep this entrusted light burning brightly, and that one who Christ has enlightened will walk always as the child of light.

 Lead, kindly Light, amid the gloom of evening. Lord, lead me on! Lord, lead me on! On through the night! On to your radiance! Lead, kindly Light! (John Henry Newman)
Bony

Reflections for Jan. 9-15, 2023

January 9, 2023-  Coming Clean
What a great way to begin the work week, celebrating the Baptism of the Lord, a great Feast Day reminding me of the fact that Jesus was true man as well as true God.  He joined other Jews going to receive this joyful cleansing from his cousin, John the Baptist.  Of course Jesus was a man without sin but he was a great role model proclaiming by his actions what was (and remains) important in those who follow and worship God the Father.   Can you remember your baptismal day?  Probably not because many of us are baptized as infants.   I, on the other hand, as an adult “convert” was baptized at age twenty on a cold Christmas Eve by the priest who’d instructed me on what being a Catholic is (pre R.C.I.A.).  For some reason he was satisfied that I was serious and he had no qualms about dousing my head with ice cold water at a stone font.  Baptism for anyone comes with the expectation that each of us “…pay it forward” by practicing what we believe.  For each person that practice is different but I have Jesus’ example of ministering to people’s needs.  He cured illness, taught the meaning of scripture, listened to peoples’ hurts and responded with love. As a baptized Catholic washed clean in the waters of Baptism, I try to follow Jesus’ lead.  Pray for me as I continue to pray for you.                   
Deacon David

January 10, 2023 - Looking Back

Have I made my resolutions for the New Year?  Truthfully, no, and further I must admit that in years past I’ve not made resolutions because I haven’t gone into a new year willing to change anything.  Oh yeah, there are a few pounds I’d like to lose but I know, in my heart of hearts, that I won’t stick to an eating regimen for more than a couple of days and then the left over Christmas cookies surely cannot be wasted….that would be wrong.  Last year I did make one promise to myself that I’ve mostly kept: more prayer time.  I tried to keep in mind that any and every aspect of daily life can be an occasion of prayer.  For instance, when I’m stuck at a notoriously long traffic light, I stop fuming and being anxious and instead use the few extra moments to pray for those who are stuck along with me and for safe travel for the rest of the journey.  That leads me to being aware in any spare moment to pray for those people who’ve asked for my prayers on behalf of their intentions be it for a loved one dealing with illness or need or simply in thanksgiving for prayers answered.  I’ve found great comfort in this new (for me) way of talking with God more.  That is looking back on 2022; now on to 2023.  I must ask myself:  what changes am I willing to make this year?  Meanwhile, I need to take care of those left-over Christmas cookies.                        Deacon David

January 11,2023 – Finding God in Music

I enjoy listening to music, music from my younger years mostly, the 40’s through the 80’s and I admit to being ignorant of present-day popular music.  As an aside I am a fan of the television program Jeopardy and one of the common categories of answers is popular music.  I know absolutely nothing of current artists or song titles,  so I can hardly ever supply the appropriate question. My favorites range from the “rock” era with Fleetwood Mac to my present day appreciation of modern jazz.   During Christmas I enjoy all the old favorite hymns and I was surprised to learn that during the past four years Mariah Carey held the top spot singing about all that she wanted…but I didn’t listen to the proper venue to hear what that was.  There are also newer Christmas carols being sung in church but I’m not able to sing along being unaware of proper tunes and lyrics. This is where I have to remind myself that God exists in all aspects of my life, including current songs and singers.  Just because I prefer the old doesn’t mean God isn’t present in the new.  Lord, open my ears and my heart to your universal presence.                     
 Deacon David

January 12, 2023 – Finding God in Reading

Every once in a while in conversation, the subject of favorite books comes up.  I’m amazed at friends and family members who seem to read constantly and know all of the current titles and authors and can discuss the merits of each book.  When I’m asked what my favorite book is my answer is constant: Catch 22 by Joseph Heller.  I’ve read that book about eight times and plan to read it again.  Why? You may ask.  Part of the answer is that book, amongst all that I’ve read, seems to have the most life, real life, lessons of any book. In it an old Italian man tells Yossarian he should learn from history and not rely on current day information.   But wait, you may say, how can you know there aren’t others with equal or better lessons.  The Gospels and the Acts of the Apostles, for example, are also full of life lessons and road maps for me to follow, which I try to incorporate into my daily life.  But I must admit that I find the relative recency of the time period in Catch 22  meaningful.  God is present for me in Catch 22 as He certainly is in the Bible but also in other secular writing as well.  The lesson to me is that God can be found in many of the things I read, from the daily newspaper through novels and the Bible.   The key is for me to pay attention to the lessons He presents to me in many ways. 
Deacon David

January 13, 2023 – Food for One Another

Did you overeat during the Christmas season?  I did.  Family gathered mainly at our house this past Christmas and everyone brought food and drink for about 20 of us.  Low calorie?  No.  Healthy?  Well, there were some fruits and veggies but lots of buttery stuff.  Since it was at our house, we got the majority of the leftovers.  Amongst us there were Catholics, Jews, non-believers and agnostics.  Our table was all inclusive and we tried to make the prayers inclusisve too.  The many gifts of God, including Jesus the newborn, were acknowledged by all, celebrated at the table and throughout the house. Food was the secular communion that fed our togetherness for three days.  While Jane and I were the only ones who assisted at Mass there was a celebration at home that united us in spite of our faith differences. We, it seems, were food for one another in our conversations and being together. What a wonderful time it was, celebrating the birth of our Savior, each in our own way… food for all.
Deacon David                                          

January 14, 2023 - Colors
One of the guests in our home this past Christmas was a lady suffering from macular degeneration, a condition that gradually robs a person of sight.  She can still make out forms but needs to hear voices to identify with whom she is conversing.  She let us know that she also has lost the ability to see color and that all is in black and white.  That revelation brought to mind how fortunate I am to have recently regained clarity of sight through cataract surgery that replaced the clouded lenses in my eyes.  I can now see well enough to read without glasses and the world is sharper and brighter.   I can enjoy the marvelous colors in nature more clearly.  People often ask what my favorite color is and, without fail, I reply RED.  It is the most brilliant of colors and I enjoy it particularly in clothing.  When the occasion arises, the vestments worn by clergy make use of red.  For me it signals that something special is going on.   We use red to remind us of those saints and martyrs who have died for the faith we share. It also brings to mind the presence of the Holy Spirit with us.  God has blessed me with the eyes to see and appreciate Him in nature and in the people who inhabit it.  Let me keep in prayer those who lack the sight to see what I sometimes take for granted.
Deacon David

January 15, 2023 - Rain

I’m writing this reflection about two weeks before you’ll be reading it.  The day is cold and rainy as it has been for several days and will be for several more according to forecasts.  I enjoy the rain here in Northern California because, as a born and bred Southern Californian, I didn’t often see such rainfall.  The rain today reminds me of having been baptized on a cold and rainy Christmas eve and hearing the words admonishing me to go into the whole world and share the Good News of Jesus Christ.  I didn’t understand then the full import of those words and how my life would be shaped by that Sacrament.  Today’s God given gift of rain to replenish the reservoirs and groundwater tables is a sort of metaphor for what waters of baptism do for each of us who have been baptized.  Though I remember my baptism while many cannot, we can all appreciate what that water has done for us and what it leads us toward. We too are replenished.  In today’s Gospel reading I heard John the Baptist talk about baptizing with water and awaiting Jesus’ baptizing with the Holy Spirit.  We have been abundantly gifted with both of those just as the earth has been blessed with God’s gift of rain.  I need to remember that those blessings are not just for me but to give me the grace to proclaim the Good News with my life.
Deacon David

Reflections for Jan. 2-8, 2023
January 2, 2023- Word for the Year
Here we are again!  It’s the time of year when people make resolutions to exercise more, lose weight, etc.  As we know, these resolutions hardly ever last and it is easy to completely forget them a few weeks into the new year.  However a few years ago, it was suggested that instead of making resolutions, it might be more fruitful to concentrate on a word or intention for the year.  Do I want to be more prayerful?  Do I want to be more authentic?  How about having a better work/life balance?  Last year, I happened to choose “healing” and little did I know how appropriate it would be!
One person I know took this a step further and chose a symbol to help remind herself of her intention.  She had chosen the word “connection”, hoping to spend the year appreciating how she was connected to her family, friends, and the earth.  She chose to clip a safety pin to whatever she was wearing each day as a visual reminder.  It was both clever and effective!  It is not necessary to let others know your word (and sometimes that is preferable).
Lord, help me do the deep inner work this year as I focus on one thing that might draw me closer to you.
Darcy Wharton

January 3, 2023- “It’s Not the Song”
One of my favorite activities is singing with the 5:00 PM Sunday choir.  I am awed by the talent of the musicians and my fellow singers.  I am aware of the time and effort that goes into the music selections and that many people put into practice during the week and during our rehearsals.  It is very easy as a musician or vocalist to spend too much time worrying about “doing it right” so as not to make a critical mistake. 
However, each week our leader Greg Pfister prays with us prior to Mass.  We call to mind special intentions and then he always ends with, “It’s not the song, it’s for whom the song is sung.”  I’m not sure how he came up with the phrase, but it is a powerful reminder for me that ultimately my focus should be on praising God and less on the technical skills required to sing well. 
Perhaps I should bring that sentiment into my work as well. “It’s not the work…it’s for whom the work is done.” 
Darcy Wharton

January 4, 2023- Learning from our Children
Today is the birthday of our middle daughter Sarah, a person who has always been interested in learning.  To me, she epitomizes the idea of lifelong learning.  School always came easy to her, and she is a voracious reader.  Often her conversations are “over my head”.  Through the years, I have turned to her to explain things to me and fortunately, she generally has the patience to do so.  She has clearly made me a better (and more informed) person. 
I remember at times when she was growing up that I felt a bit intimidated by her knowledge.  After all, weren’t parents supposed to be the ones teaching their children and not the other way around?  It takes humility to realize that our children may be our best teachers.
Lord, help me to be open to learning through whomever you place in my path.
Darcy Wharton

January 5, 2023- Reset or Replace
Sometimes the most ordinary situations bring insight.  Not long ago we were preparing breakfast when we realized that one of our outlets in the kitchen wasn’t working.  Had we tripped a circuit? Did we need to reset a GFCI (ground fault circuit interrupter)?   I quickly darted around the house resetting all the GFCIs and testing all the nearby outlets. When you live with a husband who is an electrical engineer, you know that a tool called a multimeter will soon come out.  Before long, he determined that the GFCI switch itself had gone bad and needed to be replaced.  I also received a lesson on the fact that the GFCI protects the other outlets that are connected to it.  Like so many other things in life, one thing connects to another!
It got me thinking. What in my life needs to be “reset” and what needs to be “replaced”? Sometimes I just need a moment of reflection to change my attitude (reset) and other times I need to remove or change my actions entirely (replace).  Whether I am resetting or replacing, I know that my decision will influence those around me.
I’m convinced that God uses anything, anyone, and everything to teach me!
Darcy Wharton

January 6, 2023- God Loves You
Many of you remember Fr. Michael Dillon, the founding pastor of SS. Peter & Paul.  Everyone who mentions his name to me is quick to point out that one of their favorite things about him was his homilies.  They speak of his ability to take the events of the world and tie them to the Gospel.  I once asked him what he felt was needed for a good homily.  He said one should never make more than one “point” because people would forget anything more than that.  He also said that the most important information to convey in a homily was that God loved them.  He felt that if he could find a different way of saying that every week, it would be enough. 
Over the years, I have come to understand Fr. Dillon’s wisdom.  To the degree that I can accept God’s love, I can be transformed by it.  God’s love has the power to carry me through difficult times and helps me share that love with others in need.  It’s a message that I could hear over and over again and it would never be enough!
Darcy Wharton

January 7, 2023- Hidden Pain
The topic of suicide hit the news recently with the loss of the famous hip hop dancer, choreographer and television personality Stephen Boss, better known as “tWitch”.  Many of his colleagues in show business expressed shock at his death.  Comments such as “he had everything going for him” and “how could he do this to his family and friends” filled the internet.
As a sibling of someone who died by suicide, I can tell you that we truly never know what is going on internally within a person.  There is often deep pain that may go back to childhood trauma or depression that isn’t adequately treated. 
Some of you may know that the Catholic church prohibited funerals for individuals who died by suicide until the 1980’s.  Fortunately, the Church now understands the relationship of mental illness and suicide and families can now be comforted by the church’s funeral ritual.  God’s mercy and forgiveness is available to all, and I am grateful for that.
Lord, help me reach out to any who suffer.   May those who suffer any form of mental illness find the help they need and may they begin to see themselves through your lens.
Darcy Wharton

January 8, 2023-The Most Precious Gifts
I find that the most meaningful gifts are often from children.  They seem to find such authentic pleasure in giving gifts to their parents or siblings and it is hard to miss the love that goes into the giving.  This past year, I was reminded of the pure love of children when one of our young parishioners, Aloma, came up to me one Sunday with the biggest hug after hearing about my accident and praying for me in her home.  She must have felt that the hug wasn’t enough (it was!) so she dug into the bag she was carrying and gave me a necklace that she had made that consisted of plastic beads threaded onto yarn that spelled out her name.  It was such a sweet gesture.  Even after I protested, she insisted that I keep it.  Her spontaneous generosity warmed my heart.
No doubt the generosity and love of the wise men that we celebrate on Epiphany also touched the heart of the Holy Family. 
Lord, help me give spontaneously and generously.
Darcy Wharton


Reflections for Dec. 26, 2023-Jan. 1, 2023

December 26, 2022 – Reminding

I don’t know what happened to me this year during Advent - I just couldn’t get it together to light the candles on Sundays.  Inevitably we would get home from mass on Sunday and get right into our evening routine of dinner, books and bed, and then it would be mid-week and the girls would have to remind me to light the candles. 

This is very uncharacteristic because I LOVE Advent – it is my favorite season! It has also become my daughters’ favorite as we light the Advent candles and sing “Ready the Way.”   There must have been something about this year and this season though which called for some reminding.  It is true that there will be a day when I don’t feel as though I am “chasing Advent” - I will be able to sit and pray with the daily reflection book, and remember to light the candles.  But for now, in this season of my life, I consider it a gift that my own children are reminding me. 

These gentle nudges from my daughters to light the candle seemed to be God’s way of turning my attention to the awe and wonder of celebrating the season with and alongside my children.  Sometimes I just need a little reminding…O Come O Come Emmanuel!

-Katie Maynard


December 27, 2022 – Silent Night

In my graduate studies in Theology I took a class called “Crucifixion and Resurrection in Art & Theology.”  During one lesson we studied the work of James Tissot, and I was fascinated by one particular piece called, “What Our Saviour Saw from the Cross” illustrating the crucifixion narrative.  It was painted from the vantage point of Jesus on the cross looking down upon those gathered at his feet as he was crucified.  It is a striking image as you see smirking soldiers, solemn onlookers, worried disciples and a devastatingly grief-stricken Mary.

I thought about this image a few weeks ago during our parish Christmas Concert as the choir sang “Silent Night” in different languages.   As I looked at the resurrected Christ above the altar, I imagined what he might have seen looking out onto our congregation: mothers in tears as they watched their children (of all ages) sing, people singing along as this popular carol was sung in their native language…a beautiful prayer lifted up in song.

I find it helpful to pray with “what our savior sees” as it reminds me of how he is beholding and inviting me to come just as I am…the same way he did that Silent Night in the manger…with arms open wide.

-Katie Maynard

December 28, 2022 – Friendship

One evening as I was tucking my daughter Noelle into bed, she shared a sweet story of a kindness she had shown towards another student who was being excluded.  As I was moved by the story I said to her, “Noelle, I wish you were my friend when I was young.”  And she replied, “Me too, but you’re my mom and that’s way better!”

Friendships have been difficult for me in my life – meeting new friends and teammates as we moved to a new city, inevitably being the one left out in a group of three, mean girls passing notes about me, and good friends who have taken advantage of me.  I have a vivid memory of being a teenager and praying at bedtime for Jesus to take away my struggles.  Come to think of it, that is all we can really do: surrender, bring our burdens to God, and trust that it is more than enough, because it brings peace to our wounded hearts.  No matter how much I wish that Jesus could have been my friend here on earth, He is my God and that is way better!

-Katie Maynard

December 29, 2022 – Bubble Up

I was volunteering at my daughters’ school the other morning, and I noticed a little kindergartner skipping on the sidewalk all the way into her classroom.  It brought a smile to my face, because it was like joy was bubbling up right in front of me.  It made me think, “What if my joy was right on the surface?” 

My ability to be present to the moment and to those who are in my presence seems to allow my joy to bubble up to the surface.  I know that Christ comes to us in the people we meet, even those most unexpected…and yet, it is a choice to be present to others as if I know that to be the truth.  My husband and I recently had this conversation during an evening of L.O.V.E. ministry - what if we mirrored this truth to one another in every coming and going…of course we do this for each other much of the time, but what if our eyes lit up with big smiles every time we saw each other?

Possibly the greatest gift that we can give each other is to truly see and hear one another.  Lord, I pray that I may give this gift: to see the light in others, to see you present among us…and in return, enlighten my spirit so that my joy may bubble up. 

-Katie Maynard

December 30, 2022 – On a Mission of Love

I love when I hear my daughters ask Google to play a song from church – it’s a beautiful thing that they long to be moved by the melody or lyrics of these songs of our faith.  My favorite instance of this though was the other night as I was tucking my daughter into bed and kissing her forehead, she whispered to me “I send you out on a mission of love” – not only moved by the song, but drawn to the words and using them in prayer for another person…for me.

Today we celebrate the feast of the Holy Family and the visit of the Magi: Balthasar, Caspar, and Melchior (or as my youngest daughter recently referred to them as: Bob, Herald, and Jeff).  We read about Mary and Joseph fleeing to Egypt with their new baby and I can’t help but think of how they must have felt leaving the surprising safety of the manger.  The fear of uncertainty would have been inevitable, and yet they were sent out, called by God and shepherded by angels to do God’s will…on a mission of love.

-Katie Maynard 

December 31, 2022 – Noticing

The other day my daughter Grace was reading her book and as she finished and closed the book she lamented, “Ah man, now I have to wait for the next book to come out to find out what happens.”  This is a familiar feeling as we find ourselves on the eve of a new year: closing a chapter, or being on the brink of starting something new.

In the midst of noise makers, party poppers and confetti falling, our family tries to make time for reflection on New Year’s Eve.  Our kids have been putting their highlights, favorites, and resolutions into a time capsule each year, and we have done the same.  It allows space for us to notice (my favorite word) the blessings of the past year, the graces in front of us, and that for which we “cannot wait”.

It’s hard to wait for the next chapter, but the gift of Advent can teach us:   as we cross this threshold, there is increasing light as we anticipate new life on the horizon…may it light our path!

-Katie Maynard

January 1, 2023 – Full of Grace

I always feel all the feelings on January 1^st – excitement for what lies ahead, hopefulness, and admittedly a bit of “overwhelm”.  As a recovering perfectionist I can get caught up in wanting to get everything right from the get-go.  So it seems fitting that today happens to be the feast of the Solemnity of the Blessed Virgin Mary, because who better to call upon in prayer at the start of something.  

Mary, FULL of grace, knew what it felt like to stand at the brink of a new beginning and although I imagine feelings of being overwhelmed would have washed over her, the fullness of her God-given grace allowed her to stand ready and resolute.  Blessed Mary, mother of God, at the beginning of this new year, cover me with your grace so that I might be in a place of “YES.” 

Today though, I pray to two very important Marys in my life: not only to the Blessed Virgin Mary, but also to my Mama Mary.  When my grandmother passed away over a year ago, I inherited a pair of her moccasin slippers.  Lately, I haven’t wanted to take them off – they are so cozy and of course they remind me of her when I put them on.  Mama Mary, as I walk humbly in your footsteps, may the warmth of your presence be with me in this new year to come and may I be reminded of who I am and whose I am.

Happy New Year – may you be covered in grace and coziness, wherever your footsteps may travel.

-Katie Maynard

Reflections for Dec. 19-25, 2022

December 19, 2022 - Privilege, Left-overs and Weeping
Recently at a family gathering people recounted stories of various interactions with our unhoused brothers and sisters.  One aunt told of a man who asked for money that she didn’t have.   Instead she offered him half of a left-over boxed sandwich.  The man responded angrily with profanities about not wanting leftovers and walked away. An uncle offered his gloves to a barehanded man begging on the street in very cold weather and was rebuffed because the gloves inhibited his ability to grasp money.  A granddaughter offered the observation “imagine what it must feel like to be offered leftovers”.  What happened next was surprising.  Good, generous people began to defend their actions instead of listening to why these actions might be experienced as offensive. This defense grew stronger as others offered opinions and experiences.  Amid this discussion, the granddaughter left the room in tears:  tears of frustration at not being heard or understood, tears for the diminished dignity of those for whom she was speaking, tears of tiredness…

Lord grant me the gift of weeping in remorse for the times I have given “leftovers” from my privileged excess without thinking of how the gift might be perceived. Grant me the gift of weeping for misunderstandings about charity, dignity and justice that continue to cause division, and let me weep in pride for a 20 year old granddaughter who was willing to remind a room full of privileged adults to recognize the need for human dignity we all share.
Jane Haproff

December 20, 2022 - Darkness

It’s dark at 5:00 p.m. these days.  My mother had Sundowner’s Syndrome the last several months of her life, a condition that causes confusion, anxiety and/or depression in elderly people.  It’s called “sundowner’s” because the symptoms worsen as the daylight fades.  So while many people dislike the early darkness, it was especially bad for my mother.  And, sadly because my mother was such a smart woman, she knew in the morning what the evening would be like.  One of the suggested treatments for this syndrome is “light therapy”, lighting the environment with as much artificial light as possible in an effort to create a calming atmosphere.

This is all so relevant to me at this time of year as I drive down dark streets where homes are decorated with lights of all kinds.  I wonder why we do this, why this is tradition. And I am reminded of my mother and what being without light was like for her.  Christ is the Light of the World, and the symptoms that my mother experienced in illness can show us what life without that light might look like:  …depression, anxiety and confusion.  Come, Lord Jesus, and fill us with your light so that it shines throughout the world and no one is left in the dark.
Jane Haproff

December 21, 2022 – Sun Rise

The other morning I was up while it was still dark.  I settled into my chair with a cup of coffee and watched the sun rise.  And what a beautiful sun rise it was, a layer of dark blue, covering a layer of black sky on the horizon, intermingled with frothy white clouds.  The sky above was grayish while sandwiched in between was a marbleized collection of pink and orange, mixed with shades of red and yellow pierced by the sun rising in what looked like behind all of these colors.  I sat in awe at the beauty.  The gospel of John begins by describing Christ as the light coming into the darkness and “piercing” it.  That is what this sunrise looked like.  It’s not just a dark world getting lighter.  It’s the shocking appearance of what a ray of light does to darkness. 

If Christ is the light, that sunrise was telling me what His light piercing the darkness of the world means.  First, it is beautiful. One cannot help but gasp at the beauty and glory that is literally divine. Second, something is promised in the sunrise:  a future where the darkness, whatever it is, is dispelled.  And there it is:  hope.  The sun rise reminds me that a new day is dawning, second chances occur daily and salvation is drawing near.
Jane Haproff


December 22, 2022 - Sun Light

Sun light is bright, hot and revealing.  Sometimes when I cannot see something clearly, small print on a package for instance, I’ll move into direct sunlight where I can miraculously see. Direct sunlight is also hot.  We all know what being in the direct sun feels like in the heat of summer and how it can be almost unbearable.  But that same sunlight in the winter is immediately comforting with its heat.  If the sunrise means hope, sun light makes me think of faith. 

There are so many times in one’s life when one might ask the question “why? or why me?”; times when all we have to fall back on is faith and trust in something bigger that we call God. It is then that Christ as the light makes everything clearer, and I can see for a minute what the world should look like, bright and shiny and clean.  I remember that Jesus, the man, had moments of questioning and disappointment when he called out “why have you forsaken me”.  Then I close my eyes, bring to mind His presence and experience God’s love as warm and bright.  Faith…not the answer for all of life’s questions, but a clarifying brightness that helps me to put things into context and reminds me of the joy faith brings to my life.  Then I can sing “joy to the world, the Lord has come”. 
Jane Haproff


December 23, 2022 – Candlelight

As we light our Advent candles, I am struck by how different candlelight is from other kinds of light.  A single candle doesn’t provide much illumination for one to see by, but it does induce a kind of meditative state of thought or being.  Candlelight is soft and gentle; it’s not clarifying in the same bright way that sunlight is.  It doesn’t expose things; rather it creates a kind of shadow world where you can observe things but not necessarily in all their reality.  Candlelight invites introspection, thought, and sometimes sharing those thoughts with others.  Perhaps candlelight can take us to a deeper or different experience of what is present to us.  And there in that light, I experience the presence of Christ the light, inviting me gently to go deeper than the material world I inhabit, allowing me the opportunity for thoughts to wander, to speculate and to dream an alternative reality into existence.  Another way that Christ is the light shining into the world.
Jane Haproff

December 24, 2022 – Fire Light

If you are lucky enough to have a working fireplace, you may be using it more frequently these cold nights.  There is something about sitting in front of a fireplace or around a fire pit that evokes a sense of the profound.  It does not clarify vision the way sunlight does, nor does it display the gentleness of candlelight.  Instead there is something almost frightening about watching a fire burn.  It can certainly invite some of the same kinds of thoughts one might experience with candlelight.  But there is more to a fire.  While providing warmth it also reminds us that that warmth comes at a price…something is being destroyed or consumed, whether it is firewood, cardboard, pinecones or gas emissions. Fire can take on a fierce aspect when it flames up at times.  There is a danger associated with fire, while at the same time fire invites us to community, to gather around.     How does this demonstrate Christ the light?  Well for me it is twofold. There is power and might in this light, certainly attributes of God Himself; aspects of God that are awesome and for me, that can be frightening.  There is also the call to community…. Perhaps it is that he wishes us to burn away the selfish self and join him in the world of community, living for one another as Father, Son and Spirit do.  Christ, be my light in all aspects, even when what you reveal can be frightening.
Jane Haproff

December 25, 2022 - Gifts

Mary has been the focus of my thoughts this advent.  Her pregnancy and all that it meant was announced to her by an angel.    After the fear and awe had settled, she must have been eager to prepare for this child in all the ways that expectant parents do. Joseph, the carpenter, would have made a special cradle, while Mary was busy weaving and sewing baby garments.  Then the news…they must leave for Bethlehem for the census.  We know the story:  no room at the inn, Jesus born in a stable and placed in a manger that held feed for animals.  I tend to romanticize this story, but when I think of it in real human terms Mary must have felt disappointment at not being able to give this miraculous baby all the special things they had prepared.  Stables are generally dirty, smelly places; it was cold and dark and scary to be without even basic creature comforts, happy just to have some shelter. And not much else.   And then the shepherds arrive bringing joy, celebration and awe. Can you imagine for a minute what that must have meant to Mary?  We all think our children are amazing miracles, but Mary knew hers was for sure and she had nothing special to give Him except her love. When the shepherds show up their presence was a gift to her, really the only gift she would receive for her child that night:  they saw her child, recognized Him, and rejoiced.   May we all bring those same gifts to Mary this Christmas.  Merry Christmas
Jane Haproff

Reflections for Dec. 12-18, 2022

December 12, 2022—I Am Jesus
My wife, Cindy, and I spent about 10 days in September 2022, in Kaanapali, Maui, Hawaii.  From time to time we drove a few miles down the road to Lahaina to buy food at the local Safeway or enjoy a dinner out.  On several occasions, we saw a man standing on the road bearing a sign that read, “I Am Jesus.”  We didn’t stop to talk with him, but his sign did get our attention.
A few blocks later, we passed a church that had a sign that read, “Jesus is Coming.”  Did they not know that Jesus was already standing along the main road?
I don’t believe the man along the road was Jesus. (Luke 21:8 tells us, ”…many will come in my name, saying, ‘I am he;’ do not follow them.”) But we are, i.e., all of us, the Body of Christ and Jesus does breathe and move and live in us—His Body, where he is present.
In the first part of this season of Advent, we are reminded that we live in the final days, a time of mercy and hope to bring others into the kingdom of God. Perhaps this was the message the man on the road wanted to convey to anyone who would stop to speak with him.  And perhaps the sign on the Church was also right:  Jesus IS coming again and we have a lot of work to do to inspire hope and bring mercy to all we encounter.                           
Bob Leathers

December 13, 2022—Hawaiian Angels
Before our retirement in 2020, my wife, Cindy, and I spent about 10 days every other year in Maui.  But until this September, we had not visited Hawaii in four years.  We’ve always stayed in a timeshare with inviting views of the ocean and our daily routine consisted of an early morning walk, and then after breakfast, relaxing for the better part of each day in covered lounge chairs reading books or swimming in the pool (when we weren’t catnapping!).  At night we went out for dinner at a nearby restaurant.  Our 10 days were a welcome respite from our busy work schedules.
On this trip, we thought things might feel different because we had retired.  Surprisingly we still felt rested, but some things were different.  One of the two large pools was closed for renovation, so we couldn’t reserve our beach chairs with the usual ocean view.  Also, some of the timeshares and local restaurants had closed or had reopened with limited capacity making reservations hard to get.
Enter three angels: Jeff, Connor, and Kama.  They had the “Aloha” spirit and ensured we had a great stay.  Every afternoon, Kama brought us an Otter Bar (a frozen fruit popsicle)!  And one day Jeff and Connor surprised us by putting us up in a large, shaded cabana.
Every now and then God puts angels like Jeff, Connor and Kama in your life.  I just need to be aware of their presence and be grateful for their company!                                      Bob Leathers

December 14, 2022—Duke Kahanamoku
Whenever we visit Kaanapali in Maui, we like to eat dinner at Duke’s, just a 5-minute walk from our hotel.  Duke’s offers great food, especially seafood, and it’s especially known for its Hula Pie, consisting of layers of chocolate cookie crust, macadamia nut ice cream, hot fudge, and whipped cream!  Duke’s is named after Duke Kahanamoku.  I knew nothing about him until we watched a documentary (The Waterman) about his life during our flight to Hawaii.
A waterman (or woman) is someone who can do everything in the water, including surfing, paddleboarding and swimming. Duke was a waterman and went from an unknown to a member of the Olympics team in three months.    Duke was held in high esteem with great athletes like Jim Thorpe and Jesse Owens.  He was a racial pioneer and an Olympic champion.  He shared his joy of surfing with the people of Australia when he visited their country.  Duke also saved hundreds of lives from drowning as a lifeguard.  Duke was an Hawaiian, or rather a truly American icon and hero, embodying a tremendous Aloha spirit.  The Waterman was an inspiring story and it made our recent visit to Duke’s restaurant most meaningful.
Duke touched many people in his lifetime.  He shared his God-given talents to bring joy and inspiration to thousands of people, extending a warm Aloha welcome to everyone he met.  I hope that you and I can also have an Aloha spirit to share our God-given talents with those we meet.                           Bob Leathers

December 15, 2022—Trophy Point
Trophy Point is a scenic overlook of the Hudson River at West Point, New York, and has been depicted in artwork since the early 19^th century.  It’s also the location of Battle Monument, one of the largest columns of granite in the world.  It was the site of West Point graduation ceremonies before larger class sizes prompted academy officials to move the ceremonies to a larger venue.
As a cadet at West Point, Trophy Point was one of my favorite spots on campus to relax, meditate and pray.  It still is, though regretfully I don’t get to visit Trophy Point very often.  When I do get there, or even imagine myself there, the first words that come to mind are usually something like, “Lord, how wonderful you are.  How can anyone witness this beautiful view—and so many other places in the world whose beauty inspires us whether far away or close to home—and not believe in God?”                                      Bob Leathers

December 16, 2022—A Free Gift
I learned about Sleep-Eat-Pray during COVID from a virtual retreat presented by Fr. Brendan McGuire, currently pastor of St. Simon in Los Altos.  (BTW, Fr. Brendan is coming to SS. Peter & Paul from January 22-24, 2023, to lead our annual parish mission!)
Fr. Brendan emphasized that we need adequate sleep (ideally 8 hours), good nutrition, and prayer to nourish our minds and bodies.  Recently, the need for 8 hours of sleep was reinforced by Dr. Matthew Walker, PhD, a neuroscientist and professor of sleep medicine at UC Berkeley during a talk he gave at the Sacramento Speaker Series.
Dr. Walker made the point that we humans are the only species that struggle to get adequate sleep.  He emphasized that our minds and bodies need good sleep to be healthy.  Poor sleep can result in bad eating habits (which can result in a number of health problems).  My guess is that poor sleep makes it difficult to pray, too. 
Dr. Walker said that counting sheep doesn’t really work to put us to sleep.  He does a short meditation.  So I will try getting some good sleep tonight starting with a short meditation, and I will try to make it a habit.  It’s free and it’s healthy.
Bob Leathers

December 17, 2022—The Voice
The Voice is a singing competition series on network television in which contestants vie for slots to be coached by one of four celebrity singer/judges.  To be selected, each contestant must impress at least one of the four judges in a blind singing audition.  Successful contestants are coached by one of the judges throughout the competition.
All of the contestants are talented singers and a handful are simply phenomenal singers who need little or no coaching but just an opportunity to be “discovered.”
In a recent episode, each of the remaining 13 finalists was asked to sing a song that changed their life.  While most songs are secular, one of the finalists chose a gospel song, Break Every Chain, that brought all four judges to their feet in an ovation.  The song began with: There is power in the name of Jesus…, and it was most inspiring. 
God has indeed created us with our own unique gifts.  I needn’t be afraid to use mine because God is grateful for the effort.  There is power in the name of Jesus!                     Bob Leathers

December 18, 2022—The Bible and Movies
We hear much of God’s word from the Bible at our Sunday masses over a three year cycle and at our weekday masses over a two year cycle.  So why do we keep hearing the same readings over and over again during these cycles?  Perhaps the simple answer is that we need to hear and listen to them, and then meditate on what God is saying to us at that particular time.

Similarly, I have some favorite movies that I like to rewatch from time to time.  One of them is The Wizard of Oz.  While not a religious movie, there are scenes where you can meditate on what God is saying to you…if you just stop and listen!

Nathan Castle, O.P., has written And Toto, Too: The Wizard of Oz as a Spiritual Adventure.  He writes that the lesson of The Wizard of Oz is that when you think you’re lacking something, you need to look inside.  When Dorothy arrived in Munchkinland and wanted to go back home, Glinda the Good Witch suggests that the only person who might know the way was the great and powerful Wizard of Oz.  Glinda goes on to explain that he lived in a faraway place, the Emerald City.  There’s a moral to this storyline and other stories within this great movie.  Our faith teaches us that God lives everywhere, including within our very 
As we celebrate this 4th Sunday of Advent, I rejoice that the incarnate God is near.  May we follow He who brings us true joy!
Bob Leathers



Reflections for Dec. 5-11, 2022

December 5, 2022 - Cookie’s Last Breath
Breathing seems so mindless and automatic most of the time as I go about my day.  As my mother-in-law was in her final days of life, I had the privilege and honor of being there in her final moments.  Death is not something that I was exposed to growing up.  I never attended a funeral of a loved one before.  It was so surreal and made me think of when I was about to give birth to my first child – everyone sitting around the bed, telling stories, laughing and crying and waiting with mixed anticipation for what would be next.  We all gathered around her bed, my father-in-law saying prayers and last words of love and devotion, my sisters-in-law saying their good-byes and giving kisses.  As she rolled on her side, she breathed her last breath.  There was a long silence , a pause as if time stood still even though it was only momentary.  After that brief silence, my in-laws asked if I would sing Amazing Grace as that was my mother-in-law’s favorite song.  I sang as they sat around her processing that she had closed this chapter of her life and was now in a new place starting a new chapter.  To be there and see her breathing one moment and in the next for it to be done.  To watch someone take their last breath has an impact.  I will forever remember that moment.  I recently heard this song that sings, “it’s your breath in our lungs so we pour out our praise to you.”  As I reflect on Cookie’s last breath, I am reminded that God sustains us and gives us breath to use it to bring praise to him in all we do.                                                                                                                                                Bianca Hennager

December 6, 2022 - Hide and Seek
When the boys were little my husband and I would play hide and seek with them in our charming little home.  The boys would find places to hide, and my husband and I would move loudly around the house calling out where we were looking for them.  I remember our second son (the youngest at the time) squealing with his deep laughter at the thought of us not being able to find him.  I was relieved that he was so loud, that I didn’t have to work too hard to find him. Even though he was loud, I would put on quite a show in finally reaching where he was hidden.  As he matured, the squeals got less and he became better at hiding.  I remember one time when playing the game, I couldn’t find him right away and became frantic.  What if he had hidden himself in a place that was dangerous or I couldn’t get to?  I began to panic as I was looking all over the house, trying to draw him out by calling his name.  When I think of today’s Gospel, it reminds me of this moment.  I imagine a Shepherd panicked at missing his one sheep; the relief the Shepherd must have felt when he found the sheep; pouring his love and warmth over that lost little animal. 
It’s easy for me to hide when I feel shameful of my actions or wander away from the flock when I think I have a better route.  However, Jesus is telling me that he always wants me with him and to be close to him; not to wander too far away.  I am learning the best way to stay close to him is through the Sacraments and a regular habit of daily prayer. Sure there will be times when I am further away than I would like but I am grateful for a Good Shepherd who loves me despite all of my wayward ways.                                             Bianca Hennager

December 7, 2022 - This Is Not What Was in the Brochure
A few weeks back I had the blessing of chaperoning our youth at the National Catholic Youth Conference.  One of the speakers discussed how as we mature and begin our adult journey; we realize that life isn’t always what we picture and in essence it:  “is not what was in the brochure”.  I chuckled because I could relate to this feeling.  Often, I have an ideal of what I think life should be like and then the reality of what I am faced with:  the ideal house with the white picket fence vs. the well lived in, stained carpet home in need of some repair.  So, it made me reflect on how I can embrace the beautiful mess of the life God has blessed me with.  Often I can become frustrated when my expectations of life are not met whether that is due to my own faults or the unmet expectations of others.  Reflecting on my expectations in life, I realized that any disappointment comes from a lack of trust in God.  If I truly trust in God, what need is there that I have expectations?  I don’t think I will ever get to a place of letting go of all of my expectations completely but I can certainly pause when I feel my expectations are not being met in life and put the focus on all of the blessings God has given me.  Lord, thank you for my beautiful mess.  I wouldn’t want it any other way.  At times when I am overwhelmed by the messiness of my life let me turn to you and thank you for giving me this beautiful life.                                                                                                                                                    Bianca Hennager

December 8, 2022 - Facetime with God
While at the National Catholic Youth Conference, we attended Eucharistic Adoration.  I have been to Eucharistic Adoration before and value the opportunity when it presents itself.  During this most recent time, it hit me that adoration is “Facetiming with God”.  As I was thinking of how best to make  adoration relevant to my teens, Facetiming made sense to me.  In addition, it reminded me of how much my teens like to Facetime with their friends and gave me a tangible way to relate this to them when we discuss our faith and building a relationship with God.  So as my teens Facetime nightly with their select circle I remind them that when we are at Mass or Eucharistic Adoration we get valuable Facetime with God. 
Lord, thank you for the opportunity to be fully with you in the Mass and at Adoration where you are ever present in the Eucharist.  Through your sacrifice and love, I am able to fully experience you and see you face to face.                                                                                                                                                                        Bianca Hennager

December 9, 2022 - Jesus I Trust in You
I learned this very simple prayer – so simple it is overlooked and one that I thought was not a prayer until a priest mentioned it recently. I have discovered this prayer helps me especially at this high stress inducing time of year as the holiday preparations are underway and my work is at its peak.  As I begin each day, I say this simple prayer:  Jesus, I trust in you; Jesus, I love you; Jesus, have mercy on me.  I say this prayer as I breathe in and out deliberately slowing the pace of my racing breath and speeding mind.  So far this has helped me to control my emotions and not to let my anxiety get the better of me in these stressful times.  I repeat this prayer several times over the course of the day for about 5 minutes at various times or when I feel my anxiety increasing.  It might be when I get into the car and am running late to pick up a kid or right before I go into back-to-back meetings for 4 hours.  It can be while I am standing in line at the store trying to be patient with the crowds during this holiday season.  This is such a simple and easy prayer for me that helps me to remember to slow my breathing down, slow my body down, and truly focus on what is most important:  Jesus.                                                                                                                                                     Bianca Hennager

December 10, 2022 - Show, Row, and Know
At the Youth Conference the theme was “Get in the Boat” and over the weekend the keynote speakers gave energizing and inspiring talks about this theme centered on water and a boat while being with Jesus.  One of the speakers used the phrase: “show, row, and know”.  The main idea of the talk was that when we are battling storms in our life we need to show and tell God how we are feeling.  Despite our feelings, God calls us to keep rowing throughout the storms of life and to trust in Him; and finally know that God keeps his promises and will restore us.  There are times in my life when I am struggling with storms that can feel isolating and overwhelming.  I can easily go down the road of “why me, Lord”? Hearing the speaker helped ground me in knowing that suffering or storms are inescapable.  We all experience them on some level.   What’s most important is to understand that God keeps his promises and will restore us if not in this life than in the next.  As I weather my storms, I will try not to compare my boat to others, or whether my storm is heavier than my neighbor’s; rather, I will try to focus on the glory of God and how he keeps his promises and will restore me.                                                                                                                                                  Bianca Hennager

December 11, 2022   Patiently Waiting
Around the middle of October, after limping along for a while, our dryer stopped working. I immediately began pricing dryers and had about 4 different price points to share with my husband, who is slow to commit to large purchases, later that day.  The cost seemed daunting to him even though to me it was a family necessity.  I patiently waited for pay day at the end of the month. I was sure we would get a dryer then, so I stopped taking clothes to the laundromat. My husband had a different idea.  Normally a moment of “intense fellowship” aka an argument would ensue. Disappointed that we could not agree, I returned to the laundromat.  While sitting there, I prayed for the patience and ability to extend grace to my husband who was unable to act with the speed that I wanted.   Returning home, I again inquired when we could get a dryer.  We agreed to an alternate plan that required waiting a couple of more weeks.  Time passed and it was the middle of November.  Before I left for the Youth Conference, I asked whether he was ready to get the dryer and didn’t get a clear answer. Upon returning from the conference, he surprised me with a dryer – not the dryer that I had price matched, but a better model that far surpassed my expectations. 
Lord as I wait for your arrival, let me be patient and not rush this season of waiting.  Let me focus on you, gently praying and submitting myself to your will.                                                                                              Bianca Hennager 

Reflections for Nov. 28-Dec. 4, 2022

November 28, 2022 - KonMari Method for the Soul
I often go on organizing purges in my home. It is my way keeping clutter and my life under control. Sometimes I’m unable to part with items or clothes that I haven’t worn or used in years. They will continue to collect dust in case I “need them someday” or “someone gave this to me”.  After reading Marie Kondo’s book The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up, I realized there was a wonderful process for letting items go. She recommends that you embrace the each item you are sorting through and feel whether it is bringing you joy. If so, you keep it. If not, you thank it for the joy it brought you in the past and release it. She calls this the “KonMari” technique. It is a brilliant way to help manage your belongings by weighing the usefulness and sentimental value of items and then making a choice to keep them or to honor them and let them go.

As a Christian, after reflecting on this technique, I can see how this works with events and people in our lives. God wants  me to hold the things close that bring me joy but let go of those things that have become a burden or painful. He asks me to forgive others while he offers me his grace and forgiveness. He gifted me with the Holy Spirit to help discern these things in my life.  I think a little KonMari for the soul would be a great routine to incorporate into any Christian’s life.
Jen Payan

November 29, 2022 - A Request for Help
Recently I was preparing one of my tiny preemie patients for a central IV line insertion. The nurse specialist who would be inserting the line said she was going to step out for a minute while I gave the infant some medication to relax and put the baby in a comfortable swaddle.  She returned, donned her sterile attire, and started the procedure. With ease she cannulated the tiniest vein in the infant’s arm and threaded a hair sized catheter all the way to a targeted area right above the heart. I let out a sigh of relief, having assisted in many of these insertions that can take hours and multiple attempts. I complemented her on her success. Her response really touched me. She shared that her routine before starting the procedure was a drink of water, a bathroom break, and a prayer that God help guide her.

This was such a great reminder to me of how I can use prayer and the power of the Holy Spirit in my practice more often. A quick prayer can be the calm I need and provide the guidance to act and make the right decisions. It can calm my fears, help me focus, and even steady my hands. Hopefully, we can all remember that whether the task is large or small, God will have our backs!
Jen Payan

November 30, 2022 - God-given Talents
While viewing some family vacation photos recently, I came across a few very special ones of my brothers.

The first was of my brother Paul, who is an amazing storyteller. I observed my children, nieces, and nephews all circled around him mesmerized by one of his tales. They were sitting quiet and captivated during long wait at a restaurant. He had created a character named Johnny Bobo who had all sorts of adventures that my brother would make up as he went along. Throughout their early years the children would be asking Uncle Paul to tell them a story about Johnny at every opportunity.

Then there were some photos of my brother Patrick, who can build or fix just about anything. These pictures were taken during a camping trip. He is helping each of the children chop kindling. With each one, he patiently held his hand around their small one guiding the hatchet with each chop. I can see my daughter’s little tongue sticking out in concentration as she tries to strike the wood in the correct spot. Uncle Patrick always knew how to teach them by letting them get their hands and minds involved.

Observing these photos, I’m reminded of how my brothers’ talents differ but how both are so enriching to the children. God gives each one of us very different gifts, but all gifts are meant to serve and enrich. I need to appreciate and use what I have been given and embrace those who have different talents.
Jen Payan

December 1, 2022 - Same Day Surgery
My son Michael had to get tubes placed in his ears when he was 18 months old.

Keep in mind that I’m a trauma nurse, who has seen just about everything. I’ve rushed people to operating rooms while providing breathes with a bag through an endotracheal tube. I’ve started IVs and used rapid infusers to deliver blood as quickly as possible while calmly telling a family what I was doing.

But now I was sitting in outpatient surgery with my littlest boy on my lap and starting to sweat. The anesthesiologist came in and asked me about my baby’s health and described how he would put a mask over Mikey’s face and deliver a gas to sedate him for the procedure. For some reason, at the thought of this, I began to sweat even more profusely, my face tingled, and I started seeing whiteness. I handed Mikey to my husband and put my head between my knees to keep from passing out. Fear had completely incapacitated me.

It is shocking the intensity of love and fear we have for our children. I try to remember this when I come across a scripture reading that describes God’s love for his children. Then I take it a step further, remembering that he allowed his only son suffer for us and watched as He did so.
Jen Payan

December 2, 2022 - Our Brothers’ Keeper
Every Friday my gym selects a veteran or public service officer who died in the line of duty to honor. A few weeks ago it was the story of Marine Captain Brandon Barrett. He died a young man during only his 2^nd tour of duty. What I was taken by, was a story about his 1^st tour of duty in Afghanistan. He obviously felt a deep responsibility for the group that he led. He was so committed to keeping his soldiers safe that he wrote letters to all of their parents, assuring them that he would take care of their children. They all returned safely.

Captain Barrett was committed to being his brothers’ keeper, which is what God asks of all of us. If I assure the wellbeing of those around me, I would truly be treating each person as God intended. Capt. Barrett kept this in mind in the stressful environment of war while he was under pressure and fatigued.  If he could hold to this standard during such difficult times, I can certainly  strive for this in my daily lives.

Thank you to Captain Barrett for your example and to all our veterans who demonstrate these same values.
Jen Payan

December 3, 2022 - A Place of Privilege
Nurses try never let their patients die alone. In my many years of working critical care there seemed to be an unspoken agreement among us that we would assure someone was present when family couldn’t be there. There were times when family simply could not get there on time or the patient didn’t have anyone. Sometimes it was just too difficult emotionally for loved ones to be at the bedside. This is when nurses step in.

I recall one of my co-workers being busy with an admission while her other patient, who had requested not to be resuscitated, was in his final moments of life. She grabbed me and asked if I could sit with him as a relief nurse. The ICU was chaotic and noisy that day so I closed the doors of the room and dimmed the lights. I just sat and held his hand while he passed.  

In my years working in the ICU this memory stands out above many others. I remember how quiet and peaceful it was and how thankful I felt that one of us was available to sit with him. Most importantly, I came to the realization that being in that moment was one of the greatest gifts and privileges God has given me as a health care worker. Now I always hold the times that I’m with the dying very dear.
Jen Payan

December 4, 2022 - An Enormous Responsibility
Years ago I attended a presentation at a trauma conference about rescue efforts in the wake of the Oklahoma City bombing. I was moved by a story of a rescue worker who had the huge responsibility of viewing a specific point of the crumbled building through a scope. It was his job to order evacuation of the rescue workers if he observed the slightest shift in the rubble. Any shift could result in an entire building collapse that would put hundreds of workers in danger.

One afternoon, he sounded the alarm and an evacuation began. His team came to check on the building status and found him pale and sweaty. He was shaking and starting to cry.  They viewed the points through the scope but found no change or movement. It was deemed safe for everyone to return to the rescue effort. It was only then that they realized they needed to shorten the viewing shifts and provide better support for those who had been assigned to the task. They hadn’t considered the enormous stress of holding so many lives in the balance and the emotional fatigue related to it.

I was moved by this story in a few ways. First, it demonstrates the extreme conditions and responsibilities that certain professions share and gives me great respect. It also brought my attention to being aware of the needs of the people around me. Like the rescue worker, some are experiencing this type of stress and fear constantly. Not only do we need to be able to recognize the signs of stress and fatigue in others but also in ourselves. I may need to “shorten my shift”. I may need to seek emotional support or provide support to someone in need. I ask that God helps me recognize that in myself and as well as in others.
Jen Payan



Reflections for Nov. 21-27, 2022
November 21, 2022 - Thankful
  Though Spring is my favorite time of year, my next favorite is Fall.  As the trees turn from green to yellow, rust, and red, I am witness to the awesome gift that God has given us.  A person can sit and ponder the universe, the ever-changing landscape, the life and death of plants and trees as the seasons change, and they can also ponder the people whom He has breathed life into.  And then in Spring comes the renewal, and the promise of God to his people.  The gift of new life, the bursting forth of His creation, and the realization of His covenant.  This week will be a special one, as we give thanks for the blessings that have been bestowed on us. I am reminded of Thanksgivings of long ago when it was meaningful to give thanks.  Today some have turned it into a four day weekend of skiing, pre-Christmas shopping, decorating, travel, football, and Christmas parades. We have brushed aside the gift of love and tolerance as pilgrims sat down with native Americans to celebrate jointly the gift of friendship and thanksgiving for a bountiful harvest. 
So whether I look at the changing colors of the trees in my own backyard or travel to Vermont to witness the fall colors, I will appreciate the wonder of God in all that I do, and all that he has done for me.
Don Eagle
 
November 22, 2022 – USS Arizona
  A few weeks ago we joined my daughter and her family on a trip to Hawaii.  Our goal was to see our granddaughter who attends the University on the island of Oahu.  Another goal was to visit the Memorial of the USS Arizona located in Pearl Harbor.  This great Battleship was attacked and sunk on December 7, 1941.  She went to the bottom in nine minutes, carrying over a thousand sailors to their deaths and triggering the American participation in the Second World War.  She rests there still today, a cemetery to the sailors that went down with her.  It’s a very solemn site, and during your visit you are given a Hawaiian flower to drop into the water above the wreck.  Personally, I couldn’t help but think of God as I dropped my flower.  In a way, we were giving  homage to the crew of the Arizona, but we were also thinking of God opening the gates of heaven to so many who gave their lives so that we might live our  lives as we ought.  So that’s where the thanksgiving comes in.  Thanking and appreciating the men entombed below, thanking all those who keep their memory alive, and thanking God for our family, our friends, and for all those who protect us from harm. 
Don Eagle

November 23, 2022 - Men’s Day of Faith
  Each year St. Mel’s Church in Fair Oaks hosts a Men’s Day of Faith.  This year Karlo Broussard, one of the most dynamic Catholic speakers around, spoke about the role of men in today’s church.  He points out that as head of a family, a man must work to satisfy a relationship with God by being a man of prayer, a man of the sacraments, and a man of study.  Further he works to do so for others by praying for and with the family, exhorting the family in the ways of the Lord, and finally, teaching his family the mysteries of faith. It was all interesting, but perhaps one of the highlights of his talk was when he spoke about truth, and how we are so wrapped up in current mores, that we fail to get to the bottom line and see the absolute truth handed down in sacred Scripture.  
 As part of his talk, Mr. Broussard pointed out the increasing importance of women in the church and wondered if men were losing their roles as leaders in their families.  He continued to say that men should not give up their duties as spiritual guides for their families, but along with their wives, should focus on helping their families recognize both the meaning and value of scripture and the sacraments.  As society changes, we should not lose track of the importance of the male role in both the family and the church.  I would encourage men from our parish to take part in this event.         
Don Eagle
 
November 24, 2022 -Thanksgiving
  Many families celebrate thanksgiving by sitting around the table, and before the meal is served, each person gives their thanks.  Mom would appreciate that the meal all turned out on time and done to perfection.  Dad would give thanks for the boys coming home from the war safely (he actually did this for a number of years) and my brother and I would make up something quickly. Grandma Rose was the most memorable of all:  she would give thanks that she would be with us again this year, but you never know if she’ll be with us again next year.  She was 65.  We heard this for the next 27 years, and each year wondered if this was indeed her last year. What was not mentioned was the most important of all:  the thanks of a healthy, together family that was indeed blessed to be together.  After all the thanks were said, the turkey, mashed potatoes and rutabagas were cold, and the lefse was dried out.  My favorites were Grandmas Rose’s stuffing and Mom’s pumpkin and mince meat pies. There was no television, no watching the Macy’s parade and there wasn’t a lot of travel going on. And there was no such thing as a black Friday.  So, here we were, watching the snow fall, being family, sitting around the radio, and listening to Edgar Bergen.  Those circumstances brought us all closer together and Thanksgiving was a special time.  It truly gave us all something to be thankful for.  Thank you, God for those beautiful memories and for always being there for me.                                                                
Don Eagle

November 25, 2022 - Pre-Christmas
  Very soon we’ll be celebrating Christmas. Actually, many merchants have been celebrating Christmas since the 4th of July.  The Thanksgiving turkey has hardly cooled off before stores open their doors to early shopping, and the tree goes up, the lights go on, and Christmas becomes a designer’s delight.  It does make you stop and ponder what some of these Christmas items have to do with Christmas at all.  I mean, give me a break.  Red pickup trucks?  Clowns? Elves? Blue or shiny trees?  Peacock feathers?  No, long ago I zeroed in on the Nativity set.  It’s a simple but important statement of both the majesty and simplicity of the gift of the Father to his people.  There are so many simple, but eloquent images that become so meaningful —shepherds tending their flocks, the Maji following a star, the birth in a stable, rejection by Innkeepers, Herod, worrying about upsetting the status quo, Mary about to fulfill her role as mother and teacher, Joseph as guardian and protector. These are the real images of what Christmas is all about. So before the decorating goes up, I will locate our Nativity set and put it up first.  Then I will explain to any small children what’ s happening there.  I will emphasize to young adult children the importance of this special night.  And I will share memories of simpler Christmases past with adult children.                                                            Don Eagle                     

November 26, 2022 - Christmas
  I have several Nativity sets, but one very favorite one, and a favorite memory of another. My favorite one depicts a 6th grade Christmas pageant, and under the robes you’re likely to see tennis shoes and Mary Janes. One of the kids is at the top of a ladder trying to put the star in place.  One of the girl “angels” sits on a hay bale, her wings and halo slightly askew, and the three boy kings seem to be more interested in exploring what’s in their treasure chests.  It’s probably the most charming set I’ve ever seen, and so true if you’ve ever seen a 6th grade Christmas play. But I can’t ever forget my memory of my seven-year-old self, giving all the Nativity figures a ride around the bottom of our Christmas tree in my electric toy train.  The Holy Family occupied a flat car, the Three Kings had accommodations in the hopper car, the shepherd and his sheep were stuffed into a boxcar.  Nobody could fit into the caboose.  So, around and around they went, dodging low hanging ornaments, having the ride of their life.  Faster and faster they’d go, under bridges made up of wrapped packages, over tons of wires and plugs, narrowly missing my Dad’s tree stand, which he reinvented every year from old Canada Dry wooden crates.  The figures and the train have long disappeared, but the memories and the delight linger on.  I think Mary, Joseph, and the baby Jesus were looking over my shoulder, laughing and enjoying the delight this brought to me.                                                  Don Eagle
 
November 27, 2022 – A Christmas Letter
When blossoms flowered mid the snow,                         
Upon a winter night,                                                                                                                                                            Was born the Child, the Christmas Rose
The King of Love and Light
Years ago I wrote a letter to my father, which he loved so much he shared with a local newspaper.  It was later published annually at Christmastime. It started out like so:  “As I tucked Jenny into bed, my favorite Christmas song came on, and for some reason it reminded me of you…”. The song happened to be “The Christmas Rose” and I interspersed the lyrics into each line of my letter.  I described memories of him walking in the snow, and singing in St. Olaf’s choir. The letter continued:  “There are a good many things that I have to be thankful for, and one of them is you.  From you, I inherited patience and an ability to get along with others, a love of music and a desire to be my own man.  And I hope a certain kindness.   You are a decent man, and in today’s, world, that is an accomplishment. You are a peace-loving man, and a devoted one as well.  You have character and a solid, moral fiber.  God knows we never say the things we really want to say, maybe it’s because we go through life in our own little worlds.  But tonight I’d like to pause, Dad, and say how much I think of you.  And how I think of you, and that you are both loved as a father and admired as being a good man.”  See you at Christmas.  Your loving son, Don.”
Don Eagle

Reflections for Nov. 14-20,2022

November 14, 2022 - A Movie Genre

For the past decade, the ‘apocalypse’ genre has been popular in film and television.  My attitude toward these shows is strongly influenced by whether any actual science might support the premise, so I am usually not a fan.  Underlying the narrative of many of these, though, is the meaning of relationships in the face of catastrophe.  I didn’t think any of these movies would elicit reflection until I viewed, “The Day After Tomorrow”. 
The interactions during the film made several impressions on me. 

The actions and persistence of the main character reminded me that each moment I spend with those I love means something. Those times should have first priority.   Matthew 6:21: ‘For where your treasure is, there also will your heart be”.  Where do I want my heart to rest?  Only I can recognize what I hold as my treasure and where I have placed my heart. This further reminds me of how Jesus never gives up.  He provides instruction for me to thrive in the face of adversity.    His persistence in reaching out to me with great effort and at great risk and sacrifice, for my salvation, is unparalleled.  His pursuit of me, as my Savior, is unrelenting.  There is no step He will not take in seeking me out.  Clearly, I am His treasure, and His heart lies within me, and mine with Him, now and someday for eternity. 
Ray Frink

November 15, 2022 - Adios, Goodbye, and Aloha

You might wonder where this title came from.  The words certainly are from different parts of the world.  I grew up in a largely Hispanic neighborhood.  Many of my classmates and many of my friends were 2^nd or 3^rd generation Americans from Mexico or Central America.  Thinking back on these times, the parting expression, adios, came to mind.  Adios, when translated to English, means: to God.  Goodbye is a late 16^th century contraction of: God be with you.   Aloha, translated from the Maori language means love, compassion, and kindness and is used as both a welcome greeting and an expression of parting. 

All three of these greetings contain the essence of God, the essence of love.  We use these expressions automatically without reference or consideration of what we are really saying.  Imagine the impact on anyone as they are leaving that you are handing their welfare over to God. You are asking God to care for them.  The first words of welcome or the last words of parting are an expression of love, compassion, and kindness. 

In my family, there are other expressions:  “Take Care”,  “Drive Safely”, which was my Dad’s favorite; or to my sons, “Be Good”.  All these expressions of leaving are a blessing.  I will try to remember, the next time I part company with anyone, that I am giving a blessing and a grace, though they may not know it. 
Ray Frink

November 16, 2022 - One Without the Other
           
Our parish is rich in couples who have been married for many years, including my own of over 4 decades.  All you need do is look around at any Sunday mass to see them.  They typically enter together, sit together unless one is ministering, and perhaps show affection at the Sign of Peace, the pandemic notwithstanding.  They receive Eucharist together, some pausing to receive simultaneously.  My dad used the expression that he and my mom, and others like them were two peas in a pod, an apt expression about filling a space and making it complete.  My own parents were married for over 50 years, until my mother’s death. 
           
It is common to say that in couples like this tone member is not complete without the other; you can’t fully be yourself without the other.  Henri Nouwen reminds me in his writing that the same is true of the two great commandments:  To love God with your whole heart, whole soul, and whole mind, and to love your neighbor as yourself.  Nouwen writes: “It is following the first commandment that asks us to give everything we have to God that makes the second commandment truly possible.”  If I fully love God and know that I am fully loved, only then can I love my neighbor with all their quirks, irritants, idiosyncrasies, and histories and in loving my neighbor, only then am I truly demonstrating in real time my love for God. 
Ray Frink

November 17, 2022 - A Question Revealed

I am pretty good at Trivial Pursuit, the game that is both interesting and frustrating at the same time.  On one occasion my younger son asked me, “How do you know all this stuff?”  My response gave rise to what my family thinks should be the five-word phrase on my gravestone, “Everything in Life is Interesting”.  This phrase came to mind recently when I read the introduction to Busy Lives & Restless Souls, a book discussed in the parish series.  In the introduction, the author reveals a profound moment for her when she saw God in each of a series of unrelated events.  She realizes that God is in all things and everything in life is holy.        

When I read that, I thought perhaps everything in life is interesting to me because God is in all things, and I just didn’t realize it.  Did a truth of my life just get explained and it’s been there the whole time but I was too busy, preoccupied, or simply not able to see it?   I just thought it was my curiosity.  I knew something was there, I just didn’t know what it was.  Ironically, the realization that God is in all things is fundamental to the teachings of the St Ignatian spirituality I was exposed to in both high school and college.  Sometimes knowing about something, knowing the details and explanations, is not the same as experiencing and learning the wisdom, the deeper meaning, of it. 
Ray Frink

November 18, 2022 - Walls

When recently eating a triple chocolate cookie, having just been thinking about the Trinity, another three came together for me.  This was a confluence of my son’s need for a new backyard fence, a Robert Frost poem written in 1914 that I like called “Mending Wall”, and current political debate. 

“Mending Wall” is a poem written more like prose.  It contains the well-known proverb, “Good fences make good neighbors”.  It tells the story of two neighbors who meet once each spring to repair the stone wall separating their fields.  This year, one neighbor questions why the two of them do this. 
“Before I built a wall I’d ask to know,
What I was walling in or walling out,
And to whom I was like to give offense.”
There is no need for the wall.  There are no animals to contain.  One side has dense pine forest and the other an apple orchard.  Yet one neighbor insists on maintaining the wall in that stretch also. Robert Frost speaks of a darkness that envelops the wall builder.  He notes that there are forces in nature that bring walls down.   Jesus’ message equally brings light into darkness and brings down walls.  His message of love of neighbor does not allow for divisions whether literal or figurative.  If I am part of the Body of Christ, should I have the figurative walls I create?  Jesus spoke to Samaritans, Pharisees, tax collectors, Centurions, rich, and poor.  I believe in a Catholic, meaning universal, church. So did Jesus.
Ray Frink

November 19, 2022 - All God’s Children

My father-in-law, Pat, died recently.  It reminded me of the passing of my own father, Ray, 15 years ago. They were very different men.  Born on opposite coasts 15 years apart, they had different educational experiences with very different lives and careers.  They both lived through the deprivations of the depression and one experienced the horrors of war.  They both married and provided for their families.  My father-in-law was much more successful by societal terms and they had different experiences of their faith.
           
Ray was a convert to Catholicism.  Pat was born into a Catholic family.  My dad could recite in order the books of the Lutheran bible from memory.  He had some Sunday school training. Pat grew up with Catholic teaching and traditions and continued these in his family until circumstances caused him to stop practicing his Catholic faith. Both men are children of God. 

Jesus chose unschooled fisherman and skilled accountants to be his apostles.  Likely some disciples were educated and some illiterate.  It made no difference.  Christ taught all who listened to Him how to live the two great commandments and expected all who heard him to act appropriately.  Ray and Pat did.  St Paul reiterates this when he tells the new Christian communities to embrace the rich and poor, the popular and the marginalized, with the love and requirements of Christian living.  Pat and Ray were always on equal terms in God’s loving eyes.  They can now share their earthly times with each other as brothers in Christ.
Ray Frink

November 20, 2022 - Eternal Life

My father-in-law was elderly and passed away from the ‘dwindles’.  He had some medical problems, none of them terminal, but the combined effects greatly reduced the quality of his life.  Though he was raised a Catholic and practiced his faith for many years, circumstances and choices caused him to no longer believe in God.  He was a thoughtful man and claimed to be agnostic.  As his life approached an earthly end, he demonstrated his love by asking for assurances that his wife would be cared for (that is assured) and that the spouses of his children would continue to take care of their partners (guaranteed for my wife). 
           
Confronted with his mortality and the mortality of friends, acquaintances, and celebrities, I have considered my own.  I know neither the time nor place.  So, what shall I do? 
Henri Nouwen says: “The great mystery of the spiritual life-the life in God- is that we don’t have to wait for it as something that will happen later.  Jesus says: ‘Dwell in me as I dwell in you.’  It is this divine in-dwelling that is eternal life.  It is the active presence of God at the center of my living- the movement of God’s Spirit within us-that gives us the eternal life.”
If you find me thanking you for being in my life, know that it is an expression of gratitude and joy for the earthly life I have had, have now, and will have.  I will be allowing God’s in-dwelling spirit to flow out in my words.  
Ray Frink

Reflections for Nov. 7-13, 2022

November 7, 2022 - Chapel of the Bones
The Capela dos Ossos (Chapel of Bones) in Évora, Portugal is a small interior chapel located next to the entrance of the Church of St. Francis. The Chapel was built by monks in the late 16^th century to relocate the bones of thousands of souls who had previously been buried in medieval cemeteries in the area.  Évora was wealthy and growing and the bones were removed to allow the land to be used for other purposes.  The chapel is a stark contrast to the elaborate cathedrals of the same time period in Europe. The interior walls are completely covered with human skulls and bones.  “Nós ossos que aqui estamos, pelos vossos esperamos,” “We bones are here, waiting for yours” is inscribed on the entry to the chapel and a beautiful altar and crucifix are the only things illuminated in the room.
 
As we stood in awe in the chapel, surrounded by the bones of thousands of souls long gone to their rest, I felt a deep sense of our shared humanity. We are created in Gods image, yet made from earth, dependent on God’s breath of life…bodies that are vulnerable and temporary. We die; we leave our bones behind that will eventually become dust. From dust we return to dust… I am, through God’s grace, fragile, beloved, and holy. The bones of all the departed wait for mine. I depend on God for life here on earth and eternal life that is to come.
Renee  Regacho-Anaclerio

November 8, 2022 - A Lesson from Cork
Cork… not the city in Ireland, but the kind that keeps your wine fresh, that comes from trees.  We had a chance to learn about cork during our recent trip to Portugal, which is the largest producer of cork products. They make all kinds of things from cork—shoes, purses, and decorative items.  The cork is a fire resistant, layer of protection that grows on top of the bark of a particular type of oak tree. The best quality cork is produced if the layers are removed every nine years.  The layer must be removed carefully, so as not to injure the soft, inner bark. Then the cork is softened in hot water to make it flexible so it can be formed into many wonderful, useful things.

Learning about this prompted me to think of lessons for my spiritual life. When I reflect on my life, I think about the protective layers I’ve built up over the years. Some were useful for a time, and some were not. Some served my growth for a while, some inhibited growth. I can see where God used people and experiences to remove old layers that I no longer needed, even as I clung to them. These old layers were sometimes immature beliefs about God or narrow views about other people. God softened the old layers to make room for new perspectives and to further my growth. God’s pruning is challenging sometimes, but his timing and precision help me reach my full potential.
Renee  Regacho-Anaclerio

November 9, 2022 - God as the Master Musician
I saw a heartwarming scene recently. A music school had set up a piano in the middle of a busy town square, and its talented college students were playing as people curiously wandered over. Then the pianists began inviting young children to join them on the piano bench. The children, many of whom had never touched a piano before, were shown three or four notes to play in succession. The accomplished musician played beautiful chords and complicated sequences to accompany the simple melody. When the children played the wrong notes, the pianist would adjust so that the initial dissonance transformed into a new melody. The master musician then gently retaught the sequence, the whole time smiling warmly at the child.  We were all spellbound.
I think God does that with our lives. God accompanies me in my small creative endeavors. He turns my attempts into beautiful music, and when I fail at something he opens new doors and new opportunities.  He helps me learn to trust my efforts, to take risks.  He accompanies me through life, holds my hand, and supports my melodies. Often though, I forget and think I have to do everything myself. Or I think I know how the melody should go, in spite of God’s leading.  I wonder how much easier and fulfilling life would be if I could always follow the master…
Renee  Regacho-Anaclerio

November 10, 2022 - Culture as Gift and Challenge
At Mercy Center, I’m helping with a program that is preparing bilingual/bicultural spiritual directors to serve our Spanish-speaking community.  It is an honor to be a part of this group, and it challenges me to think about how culture influences our faith.  I believe our faith is influenced by the culture in which we grow up. I think the challenge is not to view our faith and culture as synonymous.  For example, does my faith value being independent and achieving status and possessions?   Uh oh…those might be cultural values, but not Christian ones. Is my image of Jesus and Mary very European? Or am I comfortable with a Jesus who is brown or black?  I’ve learned that being spiritually and culturally aware means being comfortable with a variety of ways of praying, of understanding my call to discipleship. I appreciate difference as a gift from God.  I value prayer and scripture in different languages and different styles of music. To recognize that my brothers and sisters in Christ come from all over the world and represent a multitude of ethnicities, languages, and life experiences helps me appreciate how much God loves diversity.  In nature, it is diversity that protects life for the future.  When we consistently plant the same crop, it is more susceptible to disease or insects.  When we endanger the diversity of habitats, we pay a price. How do we ensure that our faith community benefits from the diversity of cultures, gifts and experiences that are part of God’s gift to us?
Renee  Regacho-Anaclerio
  
November 11, 2022 - The Church Is not a Building
Europe is full of large cathedrals. Some were built as early as the 12^th century and others in the 15^th and 16^th centuries.  The cathedrals are often full of priceless art work and are beautiful examples of Romanesque, Gothic, Baroque and Rococo architecture.  They are full of intricate carvings covered in gold leaf—some altar pieces contain 800 pounds of gold…from the conquest of the Americas.  They represent the power of the church and the royalty of the day.  And…many of the churches function more as museums than as active parishes.  People talk about the falling numbers of active Catholics, and Christians in general, in Europe. The United States is experiencing some of the same challenges. 
While this is disturbing in some ways, I wonder if we are being invited to see where the Holy Spirit is calling us in new ways, outside of our buildings and our limited ways of experiencing Church.  “The Most High does not dwell in houses made by human hands.” (Act 7:48) Perhaps the Catholic Church which was once very Eurocentric is being invited to look to leadership from other parts of the world. I feel excited by the prospect of a more inclusive, universal Church that listens to the Gospel proclaimed in the small villages in African, Asia and Latin America, a Church that values the powerless as disciples and prophets.
Renee  Regacho-Anaclerio

November 12, 2022 - Learning to Listen as We Journey Together
I appreciated Kurt Peterson’s mention of Braver Angels in his reflection a couple weeks ago.  I just happened to be reading the book, I Never Thought of It That Way, by Mónica Guzman, one of the leaders of Braver Angels, the group dedicated to listening across our divisions.  Some ideas in the book that spoke to me are:  Be genuinely curious when talking with another person about what they think and how they got there.  Understand that everyone’s reasoning and beliefs make sense to them.  If we walk in their shoes, we will better understand why they think as they do. “We don’t listen with our ears, we listen with our whole biography” says the author. Our life experiences filter our listening. I think that also applies to speaking. 
Genuinely listening to understand another is not common, and not easy.  More often while we are “listening,” we are critiquing the other’s thoughts and planning our responses. 

I think Pope Francis’ Synod also focuses on genuinely listening to one another and listening to the Spirit that moves among us. I am called to journey together with the people of God, in all our diversity.  Even as Catholics, we may feel divided at times.  How much better would it be if I learned to listen to others with genuine curiosity rather than with a prepared counterpoint?  Just as Jesus called a surprising group of diverse characters to be disciples, perhaps I will hear the Spirit speak in surprising ways through those with whom I adamantly disagree.  
Renee  Regacho-Anaclerio

November 13, 2022 - Soul Friends
I am thankful for so many blessings in my life, but one blessing that particularly stands out after the challenging past couple of years is the gift of soul friends.  “Soulmate” is commonly used to talk about finding that one, special person that someone is meant to be with, but I’m thinking about something different. I’m thinking about the special friends with whom I can share myself unconditionally—my fears, my sorrows, my times of shame, as well as my joys and celebrations.  They are the friends that most mirror Jesus to me.  They know when to just sit and listen; they don’t try to fix me. They know my shadows and accept them. With soul friends, I can be vulnerable.  I can be my whole, authentic self—no filters, no pretenses.  When I’m honest, I realize how rare that is.  I go through so much of life thinking about what others expect of me, what people will think. I measure my worth by people’s acceptance or rejection.  Jesus modeled how to be a soul friend.  He first offered unconditional love and healing, before he challenged people to change their lives. Rather than condemn, he asked reflective questions that raised people to their own worthiness.  I wonder how different our relationships would be if we were better soul friends to each other.
Renee  Regacho-Anaclerio




Reflections for Oct. 31-Nov. 6, 2022
October 31, 2022—Needing God

When my daughters initially heard about their overnight class field trips, they both begged me to chaperone their trips. I was so excited! But shortly into the school year, Grace started begging me not to go. She said I would be too embarrassing! While I take issue with being called embarrassing (I AM FUN!), I recognize that this is an age-appropriate feeling as she establishes boundaries and grows into herself. My kids are reaching the age where they don’t need me for everything.  I hold both sadness for the end of that part of our lives, and joy that they are becoming independent people. I know that as my daughters grow, they will rely on me less, but will also still need me in new and different ways. As always, this relationship between parent and child makes me reflect on the relationship I have with God—and that God has with me. How many times have I thought that I didn’t need God, only to find myself running back to him? How long has He waited for me to recognize that I do need him? Thank you, Lord, for your patient and enduring love, and for waiting for me even when I said I didn’t need you.
Erin Gallawa

November 1, 2022—The Rule of Three

There is a rule in running that if you think about something three times, you ought to stop and address it. For example, if you feel a rock in your shoe, you can ignore it once. You can ignore it twice. But by the third time, you better do something about it! I have started to apply that principle to my life. When things won’t get out of my head, I need to address them. I think about all the messages that God is sending to me and the various ways he nudges me to hear him. When I hear the voice once, do I ignore it? How about the second time? And the third? Sometimes I need the reminder to be present to God’s words, so now I am counting. One… two… three… I hear you, Lord!
Erin Gallawa

November 2, 2022—Big Houses
Sometimes I think about my house, with its 3 bedrooms and a playroom and its spacious backyard with a teeter totter. We have all this space that we purchased for young kids—young kids who’ve grown into young women, and who will leave this home and its rooms empty. We build and buy houses to fill with potential. We dream of nurseries for unborn babies, islands for our loved ones to gather round, backyards where will we host summer barbecues and graduation parties. We think of how grandkids will come back to read the books our children left decades ago. We hope that the walls will be filled with joy. When I look around my neighborhood, what I see are big houses that are mostly filled with quiet. But this should not be reason for sadness. We know from scripture and experience that there is a season for everything. Just as in our Church, most moments are ordinary. Many days in the church building are dark and quiet. But when we slow down to reflect, we hear the echoes of the past—the baptisms, the weddings, the funerals, the Sunday celebrations. And we look forward to the future, when we will gather again to fill the space with love, hope and joy.
Erin Gallawa

November 3, 2022—Ring

One of my kids recently asked me what the word apostolic meant. I explained how “apostolic” points to our connection through history right back to Jesus himself. The apostolic nature of the Church is such that we know that the Catholic faith comes to us from the very apostles who heard the words from the mouths of Christ! But that is a textbook answer that doesn’t necessarily mean much to a child. A few days later I was making the bed when the sheet caught for a moment on the ring I wear on my right hand. I borrowed this ring from my mother on my wedding day. It is the ring she wore all my life until the day she gave it to me. It is the ring she got from her grandmother, who wore it for a lifetime before I was even born. I have wondered which of my daughters might want to wear this ring next, to carry on the memory of my great-grandmother who came from Spain to San Francisco and who I remember now, though I never met her, because of something handed down through generations.
I have never seen Jesus, neither have my parents or my grandparents, but the faith, like my ring, has been handed down, to be remembered and lived today.
Erin Gallawa

November 4, 2022—Wet healing

Earlier this year I fell while running. That is actually not surprising… I fall a lot when I run! But this particular time was the first time that needed medical attention. There was a hole in my hand and inside that hole there was a rock that I could not get out. So I made a 6:00am visit to the ER where the doctor pulled a good sized stone from my palm and then told me he couldn’t do much for the wound. He explained that if I let the wound dry, it might heal quickly but would leave a scar. The alternative was to let it heal wet. I had never heard of this before, but I decided to try it. I won’t lie… it was a pretty gross process. But it was also fascinating, as there was never a scab over the hole in my hand. It took a lot more care than other wounds I’ve had. I had to tend to it daily and watched it heal over weeks. It never looked like it would be able to close, but in time, it did.

In our relationships with God and others, we have many opportunities to practice healing. I find that it is often easier to just let emotional “wounds” heal the quick way. My natural tendency is to avoid conflict, so I would rather take the quick healing, even if it leaves a bigger scar on the relationship. I wonder what tender care would do for those moments? I think reconciliation is like this—an open baring of our wounds to allow a slow and tender healing from our loving Creator. As I move through my life, I pray that I can nurture my wounds—both physical and emotional—with tender, loving healing.
Erin Gallawa

November 5, 2022—A Hidden World

This summer we traveled to Washington, DC and my girls got their first experience using the underground metro. It was fun to watch them learn to love underground transportation as much as I do. Obviously, I love the convenience of travelling by metro, but that isn’t what I love most. I am always most amazed with the idea that there is an entire world below the earth’s surface. Beneath the feet of millions of people around the world, there are tunnels and trains and people, an entire transportation metropolis that is dynamic and alive! Yet from above, it is easy to forget that it exists. We’ve all heard not to judge a book by its cover, but the idea of an entire transportation ecosystem below my feet really challenges me to look beyond what is in front of me. Behind the walls of every home, inside the cover of every book, under the ground of major cities, and deep within the heart of every person, is an entire world that we cannot see. I pray that my mind and heart always be open to seeing what God has placed before me!
Erin Gallawa

November 6, 2022—Singing
My children’s theater program recently had a singing class for adults. I joined, excited to sing again after 20 years away from any real singing experience. What I didn’t know is that the class was preparing us to sing an audition song! By the end of the 6-week program, we were encouraged to stand in front of the entire group and sing as if we were auditioning for a show. The night we sang, I was overcome with a feeling of awe in the presence of these women. With one exception, there were no professionally trained singers. We were just a group of middle-aged moms with a joy for singing, brought together by the shared passion of our children. One by one, the women stood up and courageously sang. There were wonderful singers and nervous singers and singers who would not make eye contact. There were forgotten words and some flat notes. I was humbled and blessed to be present to such vulnerability. These women who were previously strangers to me had become my community. In that community we found a place to safely stand up and share our voice.

I believe that God intended for us to live in community with one another, where our gifts can be shared and we are safe to be ourselves. I am grateful for the many communities in my life, including my new singing community and the one here at SS Peter and Paul, where I have always been free to be me!
Erin Gallawa


Reflections for Oct. 24-30, 2022
October 24, 2022 - Cooking
Those who know me know I love to cook but I am not sure if they know why I love to cook. I enjoy food and the flavors one can create in making a meal, but it is about the joy that a well-cooked meal brings to people. Gathering at a table with friends and family sharing a meal together is what it is all about. Cooking the recipes that have been handed down through the family helps keep alive the memories of our loved ones in our hearts. And when learning to cook a dish from another culture and enjoying their food, we experience their culture. Cooking can also bring together total strangers. One time we were at Boeger Winery for a shrimp boil. There were about 50 or more people all together at this long table. We were eating and talking with strangers and at the end we were no longer strangers. That is what sharing a meal does. Jesus knew that gathering to share a meal is so important to us not only to receive Him for our spiritual nourishment but to connect us together as a family of God. No matter where you are you can go to Mass and share the Eucharistic meal together and be part of that family.
Kurt Peterson  
 
October 25, 2022 – Special Powers
The popular series “Stranger Things” is about a secret government funded facility that was developing children to have special powers. The children are known by their numbers. 11 is a young girl who escapes from the facility and is befriended and protected by a small group of kids from the nearby town. It is through her friendship with these kids that she learns how to control her powers and understand the meaning of love. Before she escaped something happened where she, through her anger, created a breach between our world and what is called the Upside Down. It is a dark parallel of our world that is now trying to take our world over. Through the course of the series 11 learns that she can use her powers to repair the breach and send back the evil to the Upside-Down world.

Like 11 we have done things in our past that have created a breach or wound, which we call sin, that allows darkness to come into our world. Unlike 11 we do not have special powers, but we do have something greater, we have Christ living in us. And it is through the Holy Spirit that our wounds are healed. It is through us asking for forgiveness that we push the darkness back into the void and again live in the light.  
Kurt Peterson
 
October 26, 2022 – Remembrance
There is a song we sing at 5:00 Sunday called Remembrance by Matt Maher. It is a beautiful song with some great imagery. It reminds us that our faith, especially during Mass, is not passive but very much active. We may be sitting but we are mentally and spiritually moving through the Mass until we have reached our goal, the Eucharist. I ask all of you to take the time to listen to the words, especially the refrain.
When we remember you – our remembrance leads us to worship
And as we worship you – our worship leads to communion
We respond to your invitation – We remember you
It is through our full participation that the Holy Spirit leads us forward into a deeper commitment to Christ. And it is in coming together as a community of believers that we accept His invitation to be fed by His Body and Blood, preparing us to take up His call to go out into the world just as the apostles and others have done for over 2,000 years. To spread the Gospel to the ends of the earth. Or at least Placer County.
Kurt Peterson

October 27, 2022– What Came First?
I saw this sign in front of a Christian church “We believe in the Bible because of God, not that we believe in God because of the Bible.” I had to ponder that for a while to understand what that meant. For me it is comes down to the question of what came first. I know for me my belief in God started as a small quiet whisper. While I was in college taking classes in psychology, botany, and oceanography I was learning the intricate nature of our minds and how complex nature was. I started to realize that everything today could not be an outgrowth of random acts.  Nature is so intricate and the conditions for many things in nature to occur must be so precise that there had to be some kind of creative design. It was that realization that started my search for God and in reading the Bible I began to understand who God was. But it took my relationship with my wife, children, and my church community to help me understand what my role is in being part of the Body of Christ.  My faith did not begin from reading the Bible;  it first began with the quiet whispering of an inner self.  
Kurt Peterson

October 28, 2022 – Good or Bad
People say we do not listen to each other anymore, but I am not sure how often we ever have. When looking at human history, we can see that we are not normally in the mode of listening to each other which results in wars, social and religious persecution, slavery and much more. However, there are those times throughout our history when we try to understand each other. That is what Lincoln meant when he implored us to act on “the better angels of our nature”. Recently on CBS’s Sunday Morning there was a segment about a group called “Braver Angels” that brings conservatives and liberals together to talk about the division. At the end of these meetings both sides leave with at least an understanding of the other and many leave with new friendships because they see each other as loving people and someone they care about. They are no longer “them” or “those” but Jim or Jane. There isn’t a slogan or dogma on the other side but a person. A person who has dreams, goals, longings, and pain just like you or me. I never really understood what Jesus meant when He told us to love our enemy but maybe this is what it means. To love someone, I need to first know them and when I know them then they no longer are the enemy.
Kurt Peterson

October 29, 2022 – The Shortest Sentence in the Bible
Did you know there is one sentence in the Bible that only has two words?  It appears in the Gospel of John. Jesus is with his disciples when he hears about the death of his friend Lazarus. Jesus stays in place for 2 more days before they go to the family of Mary and Martha. When Jesus and the apostles get there, He sees how distraught Mary and the people are and scripture says, “He was deeply moved and troubled in spirit.” They took Jesus to where Lazarus was laid and in John 11:35 it says, “He wept.” Even the King of Kings who has been from the beginning of time wept. I think this is one of the most comforting passages in the Bible for me. We always talk about how Jesus came to save us and how when He will come again, and we will all live in Glory. But it is that one act where Jesus wept that is so meaningful. He did not weep for Lazarus because he was going to raise him from the dead. He wept for those that were hurting because he was hurting to. Even though Jesus knows the outcome, He still feels our hurt and weeps alongside us. He gets it and I know when I am in sorrow and grief, He is next to me and He weeps!
Kurt Peterson

October 30, 2022 – The Sound of Music
I recently watched a documentary called “The Sound of 007”. It is a fascinating documentary on how the original theme began and how well know it is. In practically any place in the world when people hear the first few chords it congers up the images of 007. Movies would not be as emotional as they are without the musical soundtrack. This is the same for Mass. The songs that are chosen by the music leader are meant to carry the theme for the Mass. The songs connect us to the readings and the message that is meant to be shared. I have had many people tell me how the music we play creates such emotion in them. For me one of the most incredible changes from the second Vatican Council was opening the Mass to be in the people’s language. I can get lost in hearing the readings and listening to the music. My worship becomes alive and there are so many different styles of music to choose from.  So the next time you come to Mass I invite you to open your ears and heart  and be drawn into the words and music of our faith.
Kurt Peterson



Reflections for Oct. 17-23, 2022

October 17, 2022 - ’Be Rich in What Matters to God’ (Ref. LK 12:13-21)

The context: Someone in the crowd approached Jesus asking to be an arbitrator. Then Jesus spoke to them the parable of the rich fool, urging them to guard against all greed.

I am writing this reflection while I am on the holy ground of Assisi reflecting on Francis who left everything to be rich in God. He found his richness for the rest of his life in others and in the universe. Francis was able to see the glory of God in every creature.

Whenever I read the parable of the greedy man, I laugh at the punchline. At the same time, I wonder, “What am I possessing which is not rich in the eyes of God? What do I keep for myself and am unwilling to share with others?” Sometimes, I realize I am not different from the rich fool. Though I know everything I have is transitory and for helping in the ministry, (for example, a vehicle) at times I find myself holding on to my talents and belongings which I should be sharing with the Lord and His people. We are blessed to be a blessing in the life of others. Keeping these possessions, whether they are talents or treasure, to oneself hinders the flow of grace into my life and I can fail to reflect on the generous nature of God.
Bony

October 18, 2022 -  Feast of St. Luke, Evangelist. ‘We Are Sent Out with a Mission’ (Ref. LK 10:1-9)

Jesus sent out 72 disciples in pairs with a mission of peace, curing the sick and proclaiming ‘the Kingdom of God is at hand for you’.

In this commissioning Jesus urged them not to be focused on themselves (they were asked to carry only very limited needed items) but to focus on the mission – being there for others. This is the Christ-mission given to every one of us as well; just as Jesus was given it from God the Father. God empowers us with his grace to fulfill this mission and we bring glory to his name (Mt.5: 16).  We are his humble servants doing God’s will. Remember that in LK 10/20 when these disciples later enthusiastically reported to Jesus about their mission, Jesus warns them not to take credit for their actions.  He assures them that their reward is in Heaven.

There is a temptation as a priest serving the parish as a leader to claim the credit for a good parish for oneself. Lord, forgive me the times I looked at these achievements as my own gain, when all of it was yours. Remind me that I am called to serve, (Mt. 20: 28), and give glory and honor in all I do, to you alone.
Bony

October 19, 2022 - The Unexpected Hour and Prudent Servant (Ref. LK 12:39-48)

Context: Jesus told his disciples to be prepared to receive the Son of Man anytime. Peter asked whether it is just for them or everyone and Jesus gave the parable of the prudent and imprudent stewards.

Yes, it is for all of us. Do we need to be reminded about preparedness? Do we not belong to him always? Our baptism comes with a responsibility for readiness which I forget sometimes in life. That readiness is a personal communion with Christ that leads to a responsibility to serve faithfully the people entrusted to me. A responsibility to others comes from our communion with them in Christ. And God rewarded the prudent servant by giving him charge of everything.

I am aware of the responsibility that comes with Baptism and I am constantly reminded of the responsibility of ministerial priesthood; that is, being available for the people entrusted to me for pastoral care.  It is my grave responsibility to be ready to serve faithfully and prudently.
For me, being a prudent steward means ‘being true to yourself and to others’ - How about for you?
Bony

October 20, 2022 - ‘The Anguish’ (Ref. LK 12:49-53)

“There is a Baptism with which I must be baptized, and how great is my anguish until it is accomplished!” (V.50)

The ‘Baptism’ that Jesus mentions here is his death - that is his entrusted mission - the divine call, the saving act, a sacrifice for the salvation of the world. Then, by expressing the intense feeling of distress he manifests his true human nature. ‘The anguish’ is not mere worries, rather, I think, it is mixed feelings of anxious waiting and a hope of fulfillment. Many of us may have experienced this in our lives. For example, when I hear about a surgery for anyone I know, I have the same feeling that the patient has, and the surgeon has. My mother and my siblings experienced it when Dad’s leg was amputated; we all went through the anguish, but later there was joy when Dad was with us for another ten healthy years.

I may feel tormented by small and big situations in life. But the greatest anguish I have is like St. Augustine, “You have made us for yourself, O Lord, and our hearts are restless until they rest in you.” Guide me Lord to serve you with my whole heart.
Bony

October 21, 2022 ‘Interpret the Present Time’ (Ref. LK 12:54-59)

Context: Jesus indicated his generations’ ability to read the signs of weather and seasons but they were unable to interpret the present time, to judge for themselves what is right.

At first His followers failed to interpret the meaning of the presence of Christ himself. And they failed to interpret his message of conversion. How do I interpret our present time? Is there Christ in every moment of my life? He is our strength and power to love and to be merciful.  But we live in a world where we are vulnerable to manipulation of life values. The world may offer us values that appear to be moral and ethical, and have the potential to draw us away from Christian values.

Let me keep the values of Christ intact that I may not be infiltrated by inclinations - political, social, cultural, etc.  Lord, keep my eyes and ears open to see and hear only the truth, and grant us all the wisdom to read the present times.
Bony

October 22, 2022 Patient Gardner and Barren Fig Tree (Ref. LK 13:1-19)

The context: Referring to the two tragedies Jesus teaches the crowd that any suffering by external forces are not the consequences of sin. Calling for redemption He insists on repentance and gives this parable depicting the patient and merciful God.

This parable gives a hope of redemption. The call for repentance is always for the love-reunion and should not be due to fear of punishment. This reflects our relationship with God. Just as the gardener in the parable has a heart for the tree and wants to give it a chance to bear fruit, so God is the same with us. The tree has to respond to His compassionate heart and produce the fruit of love.

What really happens in my spiritual life is that I am relaxed, taking for granted the goodness of the Lord and I fall into habitual sins. It blocks me from experiencing the compassionate heart of God and I am not able to produce good fruits. I need to act instantly with repentance to embrace Him. Lord, thank you for your patience and giving me an opportunity to correct my life. Help me to remain in you and to bear much fruit (Jn 15: 5)
Bony

October 23, 2022 Tax Collector Attitude (Ref. LK 18:9-14)

Context: Jesus addressed the parable of a pharisee and tax collector praying in the temple area to those who were convinced of their own righteousness and despised everyone else. The pharisee boasts in prayer and despises others whereas the tax collector, bent down, prays for mercy.

Humble submission to God justifies the tax collector. In a later chapter Jesus chooses to stay in the home of Zacchaeus, another tax collector who sincerely repents. All I want is the attitude of these tax collectors. The posture, the focus, the humble submission, the true feeling of unworthiness and prayer for mercy are really an inspiration and model for all of us.

I have to confess, though I do not despise anyone, my eyes wander around the church during Mass. Sometimes I am displeased by someone’s action, questioning myself if that person is praying or not. Who am I to judge? After all, I am an unworthy person called to serve His people. And I am constantly inspired by the humility and devoutness of my parishioners.

Lord, I want to be your humble and devout child, a servant committed to serve.
Bony


Reflections for Oct. 10-16, 2022

October 10, 2022 - Forget?
I have to admit that there are times when I am either lazy or tired and I fall into bed without reviewing my day and thanking God for what has gone on.  That goes for other times of the day as well.  Numerous religious, spiritual counselors and friends remind me that there is a primacy involved throughout the day, nay, through all of life to acknowledge just how much I owe God. From my first waking breath to that last sigh of relaxation at night it is a duty to thank God for life and all of His gifts.  Sister Joan Chittister reminds me that I may forget God  at times, but that God does not forget me.  I exist not only because of my Mom and Dad but because God was a part of the equation also.  So the question is, what do I do about my forget- fulness?  Practice!  My dear departed Mom-in-law was a great example because she prayed about absolutely everything.  She told me that as soon as she opened her eyes in the morning she would thank God for giving her another day (but later in her life she said she questioned God about why she was still around).  And then she’d thank God not only for the good things of life but also the challenges she encountered.  So the answer to my question is indeed to do as she did and make it a habit to pray always.  To see God as a partner, or rather, to be God’s partner.  And so I remind myself:  Don’t forget.
Deacon David

October 11, 2022 – Pope John XXIII
At Mass today Saint Pope John XXIII  was remembered and memorialized.  He was Pope when I was accepted for baptism in the Catholic Church in 1960.  At the time I was accepted the Mass was still in Latin, everyone brought their own missal to read at Mass and Communion happened while kneeling at the altar rail, all very impersonal.  Since I had nothing to compare my experience with, I was gratified with the Pope’s aggiornamento, “…bringing the church up to date.” I wasn’t the only one who appreciated him as his encyclical Pacem in Terris (Peace on Earth) was widely appreciated not only amongst Catholics but also by people of other or no religion. He was a sort of model for me given his simple lifestyle and his expressed love for all people, not just the powerful or rich.  Some said that he was a father figure to the world and it is said that he lived such a simple life that when he died his personal fortune willed each of his family members the sum of $20.00.  This simple man brought openness to the Catholic Church that included possibilities for lay Catholics to live, not just practice, our faith.  Jane and I were able to go into the world as lay missionaries to share our gifts and talents because of the guidance of Pope John XXIII.  Our present Pope carries on in that same manner.  I remind myself to open up the doors and windows and don’t surprised at who or what comes in. 
Deacon David

October 12, 2022 - Autumn
A couple of weeks ago, September 21^st, brought a change of season.  The weather can’t make up its mind whether to be hot or mild, rainy or dry but I do enjoy the chance to go onto our patio and sit without getting fried.  The oak trees are shedding more than usual and the deciduous trees shower more leaves so that our green waste container will be full several times a month instead of empty most of the time.  The change of season puts me in mind of the season of my own life, just as God designed it.  Just as the sun brought new growth to the vegetation in spring and summer, so too with me.  The pale of my skin responded to the sun’s rays tanning me a bit though I have to say that my hair color didn’t respond to photosynthesis and stayed white.  Well, the tan is fading and I’ve retired my shorts for long legged jeans and will soon be wearing warm shirts.  All of this is just the outside of me.   I’ve noticed my inside  responding similarly, more energy in the spring and  slowing down some, taking the time to rest and recuperate in the fall just as the foliage does. Perhaps it is this time of year that God gives us the opportunity to realize the seasons of our lives and acknowledge the changes we experience as we note that the sap doesn’t rise as quickly as it once did…and that’s okay since it is surely God’s plan for us. 
Deacon David

October 13, 2022 - Noise

A couple of months ago a large plot of land in our neighborhood was sold to a housing developer. Since then the ground has been shaking with the rumble of giant earthmoving machines tearing down many old growth oak trees and digging up the underlying granite rock with the aim to level homesites for construction.  The progress has been slow and exceedingly noisy, sometimes six days a week.  This of course gets me to think about the noise of my own life.  I started out pretty raw with the same sort of hard rock substrata requiring much work to get ready for development.  It hasn’t been a quiet process.  At the beginning I was sure that I was fine “as is” but I was finally persuaded that my hard head needed some adjustment.  That groundwork took not just six days a week but every day.  Those who helped with the groundwork put up with a lot of noise stemming from my ignorance.  I admit that there is still noise in me that needs the quiet work of leveling the ground of my heart and soul. I think back on all of the people, lay and religious, who endured the noise of my life and helped me to find that quiet place inside myself to build a life that can withstand the noise of the world. 
Deacon David

October 14, 2022 - Work

Once again I find myself quoting Sister Joan Chittister as my starting point: “Good work is a human being’s contribution to the development of humankind and fulfilment of the universe”.  My first thought upon reading this is that it no longer applies as I’ve been retired from my “work” for twenty-two years.  And when I did my work I considered it a “…contribution to the development of….” I was doing something that was needed to mend and reintroduce people to a society from which they’d been removed due to unlawful behavior.  But whoa, did finishing that work exempt me from continuing to relate with others, others who were for some reason not a viable or visible part of the community?  Honestly it took me some time to realize that with the ending of paid employment I was, as a follower of Jesus, still obliged to share whatever experience or expertise I’d gained throughout life.  I only had to look around me, particularly in the parish, to witness people, retired or not, who were giving of themselves to better others.  The ministries and activities developed and pursued demonstrated to me the truth of Sister Joan’s quote.  Doing, or rather, being a follower of Jesus doesn’t include the idea of “retirement”.  Each of us signs up for life, maybe not so inclusive of “…the universe” but certainly for the space we inhabit in it. 
Deacon David

 October 15, 2022 - Light

The song goes “..you are the light of the world”.  I enjoy hearing and singing that song but sometimes I don’t practice it.  When I think of the biblical admonition NOT to hide my light under a bushel basket I ask:  what, why, how?  You and I know, through our sacramental baptism and confirmation, that we have been blessed with a certain glow, a light that we are obliged to share as followers of Jesus.  When was the last time I can say that I did that?  Well, maybe at Mass at the sign of peace.  Maybe I was nice enough to let someone go first in the parking lot.  It pleases me when, either at church or in the community, someone graces me with a smile or a word of recognition.  It feels so good.  So maybe that is the simple answer to my question.  Give what I’ve got to lift up another person who may not be recognized or is in need of a kind word.  It doesn’t have to be “religious” but it has to be sincere. We have been endowed with a special light, a God given light, that is to be shared out of love with everyone.  Lord, please take me out from under the bushel basket.
Deacon David

October 16, 2022 - Persist

I sometimes hear people say, and sometimes I myself ask, why me?  There are many people who suffer, some of whom ask that question.   There are others who endure and remain silent. In today’s scripture readings at Mass we are told about two instances of persistence. In the first from Exodus, we are told about a war between tribes and how the Jews prevailed because Moses, with the help of others, was able physically to hold his arms up for an entire day.  So Moses, with the help of Aaron and Hur, kept the staff of God raised up so that Joshua and his army would win the war.  In the gospel reading from Luke, Jesus relates a parable that is closer to what I can understand.  The story involves an unjust Judge and a widow who went to the judge seeking justice.  Right away we’re made aware the judge was trying to ignore the widow, probably because she didn’t try to bribe him, but finally thought she might physically harm him.  She was persistent just as Moses was.  The lesson Jesus taught is that our prayers, as His chosen ones, should continue day and night.  God promises justice but asks the question “But when the Son of Man comes, will he find faith on earth?” I must seek justice without ceasing and know that faith will be answered. 
Deacon David









Reflections for Oct. 3-9, 2022
October 3, 2022 - The Grace in Giving
In the hospital stay immediately following my car accident, I was lovingly cared for by many skilled nurses.  I began to notice that after working with me, each nurse said “thank you” often before I could say it! This seemed so odd, because it seemed that the situation was backwards… I was the one that should be thanking them!  After reflecting on this, I realized that as humans we are created to live in community and when people graciously receive our gifts of time and treasure, we are grateful for the opportunity to make a difference. 
Jesus gave us a wonderful example.  He selflessly gave his body and blood in the eucharist as gift to us.  This is the ultimate “thank you” to his followers. 
Over the years, I have been so grateful for the opportunity to serve this parish.  To those whom I have served in some way, thank you! 
Darcy Wharton

October 4, 2022 - In Sickness and in Health
Like so many others, my husband and I said the words quickly at our wedding ceremony.  We promised “to be true in good times and bad, in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer, ‘till death do us part.”  Did we really know what we were saying?  We thought we did! 
I gradually discovered that the commitment to be there for one another in sickness and in health is a true gift.  When I came home from the hospital recently, I had no use of one arm and I was also in a neck brace.  In the first week or so, I needed assistance in almost every way, from meal preparation, to showering and dressing.  Knowing that I enjoyed blow drying and curling my hair each day, my husband graciously agreed to use a curling iron to style my hair so I could feel more “normal”.  This simple act made me smile and warmed my heart.  I don’t think either of us thought there would come a day when he would be my hair stylist, but our expectations rarely meet the reality of life.
Praise God for all of the supportive partners in our lives!
Darcy Wharton

October 5, 2022 - The Meaning of Suffering
Why does God allow suffering?  Some have said that the issue of why there is suffering is perhaps the most difficult spiritual question.  I know people who have lost their faith because they could not understand why God allowed life-threatening illnesses or a criminal act to take the life of a loved one. 
I, too, have struggled to find answers to the question of suffering. However, as I heard once from Fr. Brendan McGuire, “As I go through life, I understand God less but have experienced God more.”  This makes so much sense to me!   
In the times of my deepest suffering (physical or emotional), I have intensely felt the presence of God.  Perhaps it’s because when life rolls along without trouble, I can too easily forget my reliance on God.  When life shakes me up a bit and questions arise, it can be the perfect time to turn again to God for support.
Darcy Wharton

October 6, 2022 - L’Chaim- To Life!
After my accident, I discovered that I became even more grateful for the gift of life.  Time with friends and family has become even more precious and it seems more important than ever to show my gratitude because as other writers have mentioned, we never know how long any of us will be on this earth.
My husband and I have become friends with our neighbors at our vacation home in Truckee.  The couple shares many of our same values and we always enjoy our dinners together.  During a recent visit with them, the husband (who is Jewish) offered the toast “L’Chaim” which means “to life.  This Hebrew exclamation has apparently been used for 2,000 years and although I’ve heard that phrase countless times in the past, it now takes on special meaning.
So the next time you raise your glass, join me in offering a toast to “L’Chaim”…to life!
Darcy Wharton

October 7, 2022 - No Pain, No Gain
No doubt you have heard the phrase, “no pain, no gain.  I typically had heard the phrase in relation to pushing oneself to greater athletic ability. I honestly tended to resist the concept because I did not want to experience unnecessary pain.  After all, who wants more pain in life?
As a result of the physical therapy required after my accident, that phrase has taken on new meaning.  I am only able to progress in the use of my arm after uncomfortable and sometimes painful physical therapy and the subsequent exercises at home.  There truly is no gain without pain.  In a concrete way, I am able to see the results of leaning into the pain instead of avoiding it.
Perhaps when there is pain in my spiritual life, I will remember that Jesus set the perfect example.  The pain of the cross was followed by the resurrection.  As a baptized Christian, I can confidently trust the process.
Darcy Wharton

October 8, 2022 - Wrapped in Prayer
A few years ago, I was asked to facilitate a retreat for women who attend the First United Methodist Church in Loomis.  It was a wonderful experience and the retreat was enhanced by its setting at Zephyr Cove in Nevada.  I felt a connection with these women in a very short period of time, recognizing our unity in Christ.
Imagine my surprise when I began receiving get well cards in the mail after my accident from some of these women!  After hearing about my situation I immediately was included in a prayer chain.  When I heard about it, my heart was warmed.
Then a couple of weeks later, one of the women (who is a friend of mine) arrived to my office with a present.  The prayer shawl ministry had made me a prayer shawl.  Several women prayed over their crochet hooks and the yarn, and held me in prayer while they made me a crocheted blanket – a visible sign that I was “wrapped in prayer”. 

This gift is so meaningful to me, because it reminds me that prayer truly unites us all.  The boundaries of religion do not impede the love of God from shining through.
Thank you, Lord, for the gift of prayer.
Darcy Wharton

October 9, 2022 - Your Faith Has Saved You
In the gospel story of the ten lepers (and the one who returns to give thanks), we discover that only one of the lepers returns to give thanks.  There is a line in that story that states, “one of them, realizing he had been healed, returned, glorifying God in a loud voice.” 
A few questions arise for me.  How did the other nine not know they were healed?  What was it in the experience of the one leper that allowed him to realize that he had been healed?  Although I don’t know for sure, I have a sense that he was a person who already was aware of God’s work in his life and could detect subtle shifts in the relationship.  If you have ever truly felt God’s healing within you, then you can relate to this man.  The only appropriate response is to “glorify God in a loud voice”. 
I would like to believe that the physical healing of the other nine lepers was the beginning of their faith journeys.  For the one who had journeyed with God and recognized God’s healing, Jesus said, “Stand up and go, your faith has healed you.”
What a generous God we have that meets us along the road and offers healing!  May I in turn, as the hands and feet of Christ, offer a healing presence to all those in need.
Darcy Wharton

Reflections for Sept. 26-Oct. 2, 2022
September 26, 2022 – Peaks and Valleys
Many years ago, while on retreat I was invited to complete a “life-graph” exercise, noting the moments in my life when I felt closest to God and the times when I felt farthest from God.  This exercise was tricky though, because it wasn’t simply about listing the happiest or hardest times.  In particular, I was called to examine a painful moment in my life when my husband and I suffered a miscarriage in our first pregnancy.  During this time, I remember being surprised by the fact that I wasn’t angry at God, and I didn’t feel far away from Him.  In fact, I felt God closer than I ever had before - He was grieving right along with us, because he had lost a child too!

It was through this exercise though, that I learned what it meant to say that “Our God of the mountain is also our God of the valley.”  This notion certainly doesn’t take away our suffering, or make it less confusing, but it helped me find God in the midst of it all.  I was able to feel an intimacy with a God who is not to blame for the suffering, but rather a God who can hold me and accompany me in my valleys. 
-Katie Maynard

September 27, 2022 – More Hugs
A long time ago, I was given a “Hug Coupon” by someone in my teenage years, and I recently found it in the zipper pocket of an old purse.  In that moment, it felt as though I had hit the jackpot, and I knew my girls were going to love the coupon.  Although they were preoccupied at the moment when I went to share the news, the moment I placed the coupon in front of them, they stopped to read the coupon…looked up at me with big smiling eyes and stopped whatever they were doing to give me a big hug.

The next thing I knew, one of our daughters was making a handful of hug coupons for her dad on Father’s Day, because she knew this was something too good not to be shared!  We could all use a hug coupon, because what it really affords us is the permission to stop what we are doing and simply embrace…connect…and let love wash over us.
-Katie Maynard

September 28, 2022 – Okay Google

A couple of years ago, we welcomed a “Google Home” into our household, and life will never be the same.  My daughters now have them in their bedrooms, and it’s been fun to hear them ask Google to play their favorite songs, ask about the weather, or to set an alarm.  I say that cautiously, because we have also found ourselves frustrated with Google when it just can’t get it right: it plays the wrong song, or it “can’t understand” our request, or it blares the alarm at full volume.  Google also seems to be picky depending on whose room I happen to be in: for example, Evelyn’s Google seems to only want to listen to her voice and needs to hear a “please” (which I actually love). 

Now, God is not like a Google Home, but it made me think about supplication in prayer.  My spiritual director used to say that “supplication, asking, even begging for what we most need cannot help but change us.”  It reminds us of our dependence on God and it is from that place of humility that we are changed.  I am often reluctant to pray this way, because it takes courage to ask for what I really need! 

It’s true that God might have a different song in mind, and it might be at 80% volume…but unlike Google, God already knows what I need before I ask, God takes me as I am, I don’t have to get the wording right, and He is not picky about my requests. 
-Katie Maynard

September 29, 2022 – Warmth
I learned the comfort of warmth from my mother as she would always wipe our hands and faces with a warm washcloth.  A cold washcloth or wipe would not suffice, because she knew that the warmth would bring us comfort.   She has also been known to throw a towel in the dryer for my kids (and me) before coming out of the shower, and although I am not always as good about the warm washcloths, I have tried to share some of this warmth with my own children.  Whenever my girls are around for a fresh load of sheets and towels to come out of the dryer, I will often call out “Warm Laundry Dump!” and the girls will run to the couch where I proceed to dump the laundry out over top of them.  It doesn’t matter what they are doing or how hot it is outside, that warmth is comforting to them, and they run to get it!

It makes me think how I can bring warmth to others, not necessarily in the form of warm linens, but in the warmth of my words, and my actions.  Warm it up!

-Katie Maynard

September 30, 2022 – Shake the Dust
“Whoever will not receive you or listen to your words – go outside that house or town and shake the dust from your feet” (Matthew 10:14). 
My father, who happens to be the wisest man I know, recently offered these words to me when I was struggling with a personal relationship.  These words contained both solace and challenge for me - nudging me towards a freedom that would come from letting go.

In Matthew’s gospel narrative, Jesus emboldened his disciples in their good work, but also cautioned them not to have their peace taken away from them.  If they did not encounter a sense of welcome or invitation, then they were encouraged to not only leave the town, but to shake the dust from their feet.  The shaking of the dust feels like the most challenging part, because it’s about true surrender…and that is really hard for me!  

Lord, I pray for the grace to meet people where they are, and the courage to step back, shake off the dust and keep walking when necessary.
-Katie Maynard


October 1, 2022 – Namaste
Recently, as we have been playing video games as a family, I discovered the power of the “yoga lady” as a Nintendo Wii character.  At first it was fun to laugh as she approached her battles with a front flip and a tree pose, but it became no laughing matter as she began to dominate her challenges! 
Now, in my own experience of yoga, I have not always been able to identify with the strength of this Nintendo yoga character.  In my first practices, I mostly felt wobbly in my poses and struggled to find dignity as I would lose my balance, or fall on my face during a plank.  Admittedly, in trying to greet the light in others (namaste), my own light felt a bit unsteady.

Eventually, I found that strength in yoga comes through patience and repetition, and perhaps more importantly through the breath.  It feels true in life that strength often requires some stages of wobbliness, before our light finds its power. 
-Katie Maynard

October 2, 2022 – The Altar
My daughter Noelle is high energy, and her speed in life is fast, but those who have the fortune of knowing her, know that she brings joy to everyone she meets (I’m biased I know).  With this energy though, she can sometimes struggle with a lack of focus as she rushes through tasks.  The interesting thing however, is that this does not appear to be her limitation as an altar server. 

I am in awe when she serves at the altar because she is not afraid.  She is laser-focused, knows exactly what comes next, and has become a leader in a very short amount of time.  It is beautiful that she has found peace in the movement of the ritual and liturgy through her service.  I suppose I should not be surprised that being on the altar brings about focus and clarity for her, as she sets and serves the table of the Lord. 
-Katie Maynard

Reflections for Sept. 19-25, 2022
September 19, 2022 – Empty Spaces
The philosopher Emanual Kant argues that we are born with a predisposition to experience things through the filter of time and three-dimensional space.  It’s just the way humans are wired; we cannot experience anything other than that.  Science is based on this wiring and allows us to know a lot about the world, but it cannot tell us the reality of what exists in empty space. 

I had assumed that this empty space was actually empty.  Oh I knew there were invisible things like dust mites, germs, and gases that make up “air”, but the idea that there could be other things I am incapable of knowing or identifying in the aisle right beside me was ridiculous.  Then I thought about God!  The Baltimore Catechism taught me that God is everywhere.  I never doubted that, but I had somehow cheapened that belief to mean that He was over and above me, present but somehow at a distance. The idea that God was existing literally in that aisle next to me, was new.  I had often felt His presence but that was an awareness in me, not a reality about the space next to me. Then I learned that the cells in our bodies also have lots of empty space in them.  Could God be there also, actually residing in the very cells that make up who I am?  Of course He is, because He is everywhere!  He is the God of empty spaces.
Jane Haproff
 
September 20, 2022 - The Body
During last week’s severe weather conditions David and I closed ourselves up in our air- conditioned house and binge watched reruns of hospital dramas.  Wow!  There are so many things that can go wrong with the body. I thought about St. Paul referring to the Church as the Mystical Body of Christ and wondered why he chose that particular metaphor.  The body is certainly a unity of many differing parts each with different abilities and purposes, which sounds like the Church. But some of these parts are so hidden that I never even pay attention to them.  I want to explore the spiritual significance of some of these hidden activities of the body. For example, I rarely, if ever think about my spleen or pancreas, organs that filter my blood, clean out old cells and fight infection to name just a few of their activities.  Nor do I think about my hypothalamus that works as a control center keeping my body in a stable state. These organs when healthy do this all the time, whether I’m awake or asleep or want them to or not.  The reasoning ability that I treasure so much and which I use to govern my conscious choices is helpless here.  There is something both frightening and awe-inspiring about this for me.  And it places me squarely in the presence of God who designed this wonderous machine.  There He is… in the very core of my physical existence working away non-stop trying to keep me safe, and helping me function until he calls me home. 
Jane Haproff

September 21, 2022 – Compassion
As I think about the God who inhabits my very being,  I am reminded of the dialogue between Bishop Tutu and the Dalai Lama captured in the film  Mission:  Joy. (on Amazon Prime!). One is Christian and the other Buddhist, but they both believe that we are wired for compassion, that it is part of what it means to be human.  Once cultural influences are stripped away we discover that compassion remains.  Because compassion is basic to our humanity we can only experience happiness and joy when we engage with each other at that level.  Our culture teaches us that happiness is a bigger house, nicer car, more money, etc.  But their message is that if we fail to connect with each other with justice and mercy, listening to and even forgiving those who hurt us we can never by happy. They both agreed that it isn’t easy.  Compassion is like a muscle that must be strengthened through the exercise of prayer and meditation.

So, once again, I find something of God at work in me hidden at the cellular level: compassion.  And once again I am directed to find strength in quiet time with the God who is apparently so much more present in my life than I imagined as that child devoutly praying to be a saint.
Jane Haproff

September 22, 2022 - Relationships
Weeks ago my friend found her partner dead on his bathroom floor.  She and her partner were not married and did not live together.  She was divorced. After her son was accidentally shot her husband was lost in a grief that cost them their marriage. She refused to seek an annulment because she believed they had had a sacramental marriage.  And she would not remarry outside the church.  She was nearly crushed again by the circumstances of this more recent death.  She was angry at God.   I attempted to console her, saying it is okay to be angry at God because often it’s those closest to us who can cause the most anger.  She agreed with me and told me that after her son’s death she would go into the Church in the middle of the night (she was music director and had keys) sit in front of the tabernacle and scream at God, crying in anger.

I tell this story because it speaks to me about layers of relationship and where God is in all of it.  My friend retained a kind of relationship to the ideal that God called her to in her marriage. She was present to her partner through his illness, bringing God’s presence and care to him. She trusted her relationship with God enough to rage at Him for these untimely deaths. Then while watching the Queen’s funeral on TV she heard words of comfort that spoke to her. As she began to weep, a soft rain fell and she felt a holy presence.
Jane Haproff

September 23, 2022 - Preferential Option for the Poor
The weather conditions of a week ago combined with the drought caused me to think about what it must be like to be poor.  We live in air-conditioned comfort about five miles from the DeWitt Center where over one hundred unhoused people camp without water or shade.  An air-conditioned Welcome Center is about a mile from the encampment where bottles of water, a TV and charging stations are available.  No showers or laundry facilities.  The sheriff patrols regularly directing people to mental health and probation services, but the county does not offer more at the actual campsite worrying that might become permanent and offend the neighbors. 

In the early 70’s the Church adopted a position that said when competing interests come into play, those solutions that favor the poor must be chosen because not only did Jesus model that for us, he chose to be one of the poor.  So many gospel stories tell us that He is there in the lives of the poor…unhoused, dirty, thirsty, and neglected.  So I wonder how do I personally live this preferential option for the poor?  Do I choose policies that welcome Him into my neighborhood, or do I look the other way, offering prayers and charity, which is easy to do? I tell myself I’m a good person; I don’t rock the boat.  I lector and write reflections, surely doing what God has asked of me.  But please Lord, don’t ask me to welcome them (you) into my neighborhood!
Jane Haproff

September 24, 2022 - Memory(ies)
Our oldest son recently turned sixty.  David and I decided to put together a memory book for him, each or us identifying our favorite memories of his growing up.  It was difficult.  There were easy memories of his early years.  The memories got harder to recall in those middle years of junior high school and high school; years packed with children’s school events, sporting events, firsts jobs, proms, etc.  All of the things you think you will never forget, but that get buried in the busyness of a large family.  I grieved those lost memories.

As I think about the intensity of the feelings I had in trying to remember significant events for our son, I thought about God and what role memory might play with and for Him/Her.  Scripture describes God has having emotions, such as joy, anger, love.  He rejoices and is pleased and displeased.  God knows everything about me, but does He attach those feelings to individual, specific events in my life? Does He remember when I was unkind to Maria in seventh grade?  Or is His love so prevailing that it actually overrides specific memories so that God is just pure love in the end? I felt such intense love for my son, even though I could not recall all of the details of his life.  I’m guessing that that’s just a whisper of the kind of love God has for me, loving and forgiving at the same time the totality in of who I am, and not dissecting my life event by event.
Jane Haproff

September 25, 2022 - Circularity
Recently Fr. Bony built a homily around how Jesus is the host at the Eucharistic feast where he provides the food that is His body and then sends us out to be no longer His guests but His presence in the world, commissioned to be hosts now to other people. Soon after that at another Mass as I heard the words of the Eucharistic Prayer I recognized another circular relationship.  We entreat God to sanctify the gifts of bread and wine that we bring to the altar, then the words of consecration are said over them and they become the Body and Blood of Jesus. But this bread and wine is nothing but the ordinary work of our hands which is now God. Then Father offers Jesus to the Lord as a sacrifice.  Jesus, Lord himself, is offered to the Lord; God offers Himself as sacrifice to Himself!  I don’t think I ever fully realized what this all means. God takes the ordinariness of our life, blesses it and it becomes both spiritual food for us and sacrifice for us.  All these words have been part of my vocabulary all of my life.  But the reality of the meaning of what God has done for me is staggering.  These circles of meaning say so much about how God must love us.  I am left with the realization again:  Lord I am not worthy.
Jane Haproff

Reflections for Sept, 12-18, 2022

September 12, 2022—The Chosen

At Confirmation in our parish a few weeks ago, the Bishop encouraged our 80+ confirmandi to read the Bible.  I think a great addition to the Bishop’s thoughtful advice might be to encourage the confirmandi to also watch The Chosen. The Chosen is the first-ever multi-season TV series about the life of Christ.  Two seasons have been released with a total of 7 planned.

A contributor to the Jesuit publication, America, wrote: “The church and the faithful need this show. But in all the … education that has formed my faith, it never occurred to me that the apostles had full lives with families, jobs, commitments, and challenges, just like I do—and that Jesus disrupts all of that when he arrives.” 

When I was in formation to be a deacon, I had over three years of scripture study.  So, at first, I was reluctant to watch another movie about the life of Christ.  My wife, though, had never formally studied the Bible; and The Chosen provided a poignant perspective for her.  Together we binge watched Seasons 1 and 2 in under two weeks.  I found the series to be very faithful to the Gospels, but the stories were presented with some “creative license” to allow you to imagine that you were there.  I found Jesus very human, so his decisions involved questioning and trust and doubt.

Many of the episodes brought tears to our eyes.  Probably the most poignant was the conversion of Mary Magdalene.  Watching this series allowed us to experience Christ and the Bible in a whole new way.

Bob Leathers


September 13, 2022—The Four Gifts

A few weeks ago, Cindy and I saw the play, The Four Gifts, based on the book with the same name by Fr. Joe Bradley, a priest in the Archdiocese of San Francisco.  Presented at Hillbarn Theatre in Foster City, Fr. Joe was there himself for its final showing.  Imagine being a happy and dedicated young priest who gave wonderful homilies (and inspired some of mine!), inspired his students, offered hope when needed, and loved the people he served, only to find out that you had a short time to live unless you received a heart transplant.

No one would ever have guessed Joe Bradley would become a priest.  He was both an alcoholic and a drug addict.  Regretfully, he gave drugs to a friend who was injured in a car crash and later died.  Yet God called this man to be a priest.

God gifted Joe to (1) reclaim his faith, (2) become sober and be ordained a priest, (3) receive a new heart, and (4) have a new life.

Father Joe’s life offers me encouragement whenever I fall short.  Recently, a friend confided that he lost his temper with his mom who has early onset dementia.  I reminded him of the times I lost it with my own mom who also suffered from dementia.  Since we are human, God can do nothing with us if we are perfect.  No matter what our struggles are God calls us to new life whenever we fall short. 

Bob Leathers

September 14, 2022—Eucharist as Paradox
When I was in diaconate formation, my canon law professor summed up the 1,752 Church canons as follows: If you are going to err, err on the side of charity.  Pope Francis himself said as much in a recent interview, “What should a shepherd do? They must be a shepherd with God's style. And God's style is closeness, compassion and tenderness.”
As a Catholic, I believe our faith is full of paradoxes.  For example, if you want to have life, you must be willing to carry your cross.  The bread that becomes Eucharist is also a paradox:  The bread is a source of joy, strength and nourishment, but to become bread, the kernels of wheat must be crushed.

Ron Rolheiser, OMI, is one of my favorite spiritual writers.  Some years ago, he published a reflection on the Eucharist that really struck me:  For some it is a celebration of reconciliation, a ritual that forgives and unites, for others unity and reconciliation are pre-conditions for its proper celebration. Another paradox! Perhaps there is truth in both.

Bob Leathers

September 15, 2022—Uncle Mike 

When I was growing up in Miami, I lived in a 3-bedroom, one bath home with my parents, my grandmother, and my grandmother’s brother, Uncle Mike.  Uncle Mike was my favorite uncle and he loved me as if I were his son. He never drove a car, so occasionally he’d take me on bus rides all over town.  We even joked one day that we might take a Greyhound Bus ride all the way across the country to California!

As a young boy, I became pretty adept at putting on puppet shows, so Uncle Mike built a puppet stage for me that I could use with hand puppets as well as marionettes.  When I was a bit older, because we had such a small house, Uncle Mike and I shared a room together.  One day, I came home from school to learn that Uncle Mike had moved out of the house into his own apartment a couple of miles away, and this upset me and our family.  Uncle Mike was also quite stubborn, a trait I’m afraid still runs in my family (including me, I’m told), because no amount of persuasion from my mother and grandmother convinced him to come back home.  This experience never left me, but it was years later before I realized that Uncle Mike moved out of the house because he loved me and wanted me to have my own room in our small house.  What a wonderful gift of self-less love!  

Bob Leathers

September 16, 2022—Lewis and Clark

This summer, Cindy and I took a 7-day river cruise along the Snake and Columbia Rivers in the Pacific Northwest.  We experienced beautiful scenery, great food, and outstanding service in a new river boat equipped with many amenities.  During the cruise, we went through 8 locks and learned a great deal about the Pacific Northwest including about the explorers Meriwether Lewis and William Clark who with their crew were charged with discovering a path to the Pacific Ocean from St. Louis.  The exploration spanned over two years in the early 1800s (during the presidency of Thomas Jefferson following the Louisiana Purchase).

On their expedition, Lewis and Clark and their crew endured many hardships including frigid weather, storms, hazardous terrain and hunger.  They encountered and had to interact and communicate with many Native American tribes.  I can’t help but imagine how their grit, determination and courage paved the way for the generations that followed them, including Cindy and me on a relaxing river cruise through 8 locks. 

From time to time, we sing the hymn, “Go Make a Difference,” at our Sunday masses.  Probably without knowing it, Lewis and Clark and their expeditionary team made a difference.  God put them in the right place at the right time and with the right gifts and skills, and we are the beneficiaries who get to enjoy the fruits of their efforts.  

Bob Leathers

September 17, 2022—World’s Greatest Rosary Collection

Believe it or not, the world’s largest rosary collection is not in a museum at the Vatican, but in the Spiritual Quest Gallery of the Columbia Gorge Interpretative Center in Stevenson, Washington.  Cindy and I toured the Center during a stop on our river cruise along the Columbia River this summer.

Nearly 4,000 rosaries are displayed along with other religious artifacts associated with Pacific Northwest history.  A few of the rosaries have historical significance including one donated by President John F. Kennedy which he may have used during World War II before he became president

The collection is attributed to Don Brown, who grew up and lived in the area. His devotion grew out of his confinement in a hospital with a severe attack of pneumonia.  He observed that the rosaries were being worn by the Sisters of Mercy, and the rosaries inspired him to adopt the Catholic faith.

Seeing this magnificent collection gave me pause to reflect on my own collection of 5 or 6 rosaries, including a couple of finger rosaries.  I’ve been through periods in my life where I’ve prayed the rosary daily and other times when I have not.  The important thing I’ve realized, though, is to pray as you can and not as you can’t.  At times, it’s easy to pray spontaneously; at other times, I need the repetitiveness of the prayers in the rosary.  How I pray continues to evolve and I’ve come to realize that spending time with God—who always loves us—is what is most important.

Bob Leathers

September 18, 2022—Cursillo

At SS. Peter & Paul, we are very blessed to have a very active Cursillo group.  Cursillo is a Spanish word for “short course in Christ.”  This is my brief Cursillo story:

In 1977, two friends encouraged me to make a Cursillo weekend.  I had first heard about Cursillo from my pastor, who established the Cursillo movement in South Florida.  Witnessing how Cursillo made the faith of my two friends become alive made me want to attend one, and so they sponsored me.

The weekend itself was wonderful, but the experience the next day changed my life.  On the Monday morning following Cursillo, April 18th, I drove to work in downtown Miami, parked the car at a meter, and then had an overwhelming experience of the presence of Christ. From this day forward, I went to Mass because I wanted to and not out of habit.  For the 9 months following this experience, I spoke openly of my faith, and I was on cloud nine! 

The Cursillo experience enlivened and deepened my faith.  Another result was that my prayer life deepened, I began to study my faith, and I became more active in Church service.  Ultimately, it led me to consider a call to become a deacon.   Retreat experiences like Cursillo give us a chance to let God in and spend time with God, enable opportunities to experience the presence of Christ, and transform both us and the Church.

Bob Leathers





Reflections for Sept. 5-11, 2022

September 5, 2022 - Pruning & Gardening
I am not a gardener, but I enjoy experiencing a well landscaped piece of property.  Recently I went to Butchart Gardens and took in all the amazing beauty that surrounded me.  There was such a sense of peace that came over me as I walked around the grounds taking endless pictures.  It inspired me to think of ways that maybe I could try gardening at home on a small scale.  I desire to have some fresh food that I can grow on my own even if it is simple herbs or fruits that you plant in pots.  What holds me back from moving forward with this desire is the need to prune and the potential for it not to work.  The doubt of what if the plants die?  What if there is no harvest? What if I don’t take the time to make sure the garden is well tended?  My mind then returns to the luscious grounds at Butchart Gardens and I am in awe. I cannot even begin to fathom the amount of time and resources it takes to maintain the grounds there.  I know my garden will look quite different and I am not opposed to that.  I am held back with the doubt of investing time, energy, money into something and not getting a “return”.  Oh, what if God thought of us like that?!  God prunes us in ways we may not even realize and puts on our heart to go beyond what we thought possible.  As we get ready to begin the season of Fall, I look forward to the beginning of the change of seasons, the leaves, and the eventual fall.  Though we go through seasons many times over I pray this season is one where I ponder how God is pruning me and helping me to grow my spiritual garden. 
Bianca Hennager

September 6, 2022 - Truth and Love
“Do not accept anything as the truth if it lacks love. And do not accept anything as love which lacks truth.” (Edith Stein).  This quote has become a cornerstone for me as I interact with others.  What I say does matter and needs to be thoughtful and spoken with love.   Often, I have let my emotions get the better of me and will blurt out some flippant response not realizing the impact it may have on those that I love.  Typically, when this happens, I circle back afterwards asking for forgiveness, but I feel like the damage has already been done.  It is hard to take back words after they are spoken.  Recently I had the opportunity to put this quote into practice and let me tell you it was hard.  It required a lot of self-control and reflection on what was really bothering me and how I could speak it with love.  The outcome of the conversation was beautiful though.  Our ability to come together to see what we have in common and what we want as an outcome was productive and life giving.  Both of us walked away with a clearer picture of what we each needed to do.  We put a plan in action to get us the outcome we wanted.
Bianca Hennager

September 7, 2022 - Discipline
The word discipline means to train or to teach someone to obey rules or a code of behavior.  As I was reading a passage from St. Paul he stated, “Endure your trials as discipline; God treats you as sons. For what son is there whom his father does not discipline?” (Hebrews 12:7-8).   Reading that Scripture was an “ah-ha” moment for me as to how I approach my trials.  If I view my trials as something to get through and “why me” then I am losing sight of the discipline it is teaching me.  If I tend to have a “Job” complex – why can’t anything go right in my life, then I am missing out on the love that God has for me to help train me up in the ways he wants for me.  Looking at my trials as disciplining myself, I have become strengthened and overall a more spirite filled individual.  Thank you, Lord, for all the ways you are helping me to become more disciplined and closer to you through my trials.
Bianca Hennager

September 8, 2022 - Happy Birthday

Happy Birthday Mary and Michael! As a cradle Catholic, I must admit I was not aware of September 8^th being the birthday of our Blessed Mother until I had my second son, Michael born on the same day.  We celebrate Mary’s Immaculate Conception on December 8^th as a Holy Day but not her birthday.  One of the most poignant things I remember from my birth experience with Michael was the phrase “let it go.”  This simple phrase held so much meaning as I had to let go of what I thought my birth experience was going to be, what eventually happened, and how I would move beyond it.  I imagine Mary’s fiat being similar; her willingness to do God’s will meant she had to let go of what she may have wanted. She had to trust in God that he would make all things work.  And boy did he!  Through Mary God gave us our Lord and Savior Jesus, which is the most awesome gift, beyond what we could imagine.  Mary serves as a pivotal role model for me as a Mother, woman, and follower of Christ.  Her willingness to be open to doing what God wanted in her life is awe-inspiring.  The depth of her faith inspires me to trust more in God even when things seem impossible. 
Bianca Hennager

September 9, 2022 - Thank You for My fork
When my two boys were old enough to speak, I started teaching them common Catholic prayers such as Prayer before meals, Our Father, and Hail Mary.  After our prayer before meals, we would go around the table and say one thing we were thankful for.  My oldest son John would say joyfully, “thank you for my fork.”  The first couple of times he said this, it was endearing. He was about three years old and had a strong vocabulary.  Day after day he would thank God for the items placed in front of him; his Spiderman cup, his plate, his napkin, and the list continued.  One day when I was meeting with his preschool teacher, Sr. Olga, I shared my annoyance at the lack of reverence my three old year had.  Out of all the things he could be thankful for, he is choosing objects at the dinner table.  Sr. Olga looked at me with loving eyes and said, “there are many people in this world who don’t have these items.”  Sr. Olga was right; there are many people in this world without utensils to use when they eat, or cups to drink from.  I was humbled by her lovingly reminder that even the simple things that we often take for granted are worthy of our gratitude.  Now when we go around the dinner table and my children (much older) offer up their thankfulness, I use it as a reminder of all of the wonderful blessings we have and not to take anything for granted, even the simple things like forks. 
Bianca Hennager

September 10, 2022 - Is Today the Day?
My Mother-in-law was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer last October with a prognosis of 6 to 12 months.  The last week she has turned a corner in her struggle, and we can more immediately see her nearing the end of life.  I am not really experienced with the end of life experience; however, I am learning a lot about this phase.  I liken it to when I was pregnant and had reached a certain point in the pregnancy where you are “ready” to have the baby.  It just reminds me how circular life is and how we are so impatient for God’s timing.  When things are beyond our control and we have no real sense of time, but we want to move through whatever “it” is quickly.  My husband shared how he dreads getting a phone call or seeing a text from family member(s).  He confessed to me, “is today going to be the day that I lose my mom?”  My heart hurts seeing him and the rest of the family as they come together to provide comfort and peace to their mother.  I continually lift them up in prayer but have no answer as to when the day will come.  The family is all together keeping a vigilant watch on their mother, tending to her in her final days.  “Therefore keep watch, because you do not know the day or the hour” (Mt 25:13).
Bianca Hennager

September 11, 2022 - Lost but Now Found
The story of the Prodigal Son is a famous Gospel parable and one of my favorites.  When I was re-reading this Gospel something different sparked my curiosity.  I wonder what made the Prodigal Son want to return.  Why that day did the prodigal son decide to return home?  As my imagination got the better of me with all kinds of possibilities it had me questioning all sorts of situations like where someone may feel lost and then finds themselves.  Take for example, the alcoholic – what makes them stop drinking or what makes the addict get their last fix?  I am reminded that each day we wake up and we can make a choice whether to be lost or to come back to our Father.  The choice is ours to be welcomed into his embrace and to be found.  I can imagine the amount of shame the son must have felt knowing how he had disappointed his father.  I am sure the son felt a fair amount of guilt too.  Despite those overwhelming feelings, the feeling of needing to be home outweighed the guilt and shame.  I pray for all those who may be lost that they feel the need to come home and be welcomed as the Gospel tells us to welcome our lost brothers and sisters.    
Bianca Hennager



Reflections for Aug. 29-Sept. 4, 2022

August 29, 2022 - The Leap of Faith
Our Family Ministry group used to camp at Scott’s Flat Lake every summer. One of the ongoing traditions was to take a short hike to the spillway on the lake. Above it was a catwalk over a deep area of water. Depending on the height of the lake that year, the jump could be a 10-to-20-foot drop into the water. The kids would line up in their swimsuits, with their little legs shaking with excitement, adrenaline, and anxiety as they prepared to jump off. They were encouraged to face their fear and jump as everyone cheered them on. After the plunge, they would emerge from the water with such pride and accomplishment.

I’m reminded of moments like these when fear and anxiety overwhelm me. Hopefully our children will remember this as well. They all did a hard and scary thing but succeeded with their bravery and the support of their community. Taking risks, whether they are physical or spiritual can be difficult and frightening. But the reward is great. Musician Alanis Morrisette puts it best in her song “Thank You.” She sings “the moment I jumped off of it was the moment I touched down.” In other words, pushing past our fear can bring us great peace, fulfilment, and self-awareness.

With our faith in God, the power of the Holy Spirit, and the support of those around us, we can do hard things. And it makes for great campfire stories!
Jen Payan

August 30, 2022 - Mass Under the Trees
Camping with the Family Ministry group brings back so many fond memories. Every summer during our camping trip at Scott’s Flat Lake our group would celebrate mass. We would set an altar right in the middle of camp and our talented parishioners would organize a liturgy. The children would take on many roles in the mass. One of our priests would join us and preside over mass in the beautiful, forested campground as we sat around in our camping chairs.

One year we met another Catholic group that was staying on the other side of the campground and we invited them to our mass. The next thing we knew people were flocking to our camp with their chairs to celebrate the liturgy.  Our gathering had over doubled in size and we up  realized we may have a “loaves and fishes” scenario on our hands! We had not accounted for the volume of hosts we may need for our mass. Yet, all who came for communion were able to receive. While it was probably just Michelle Pfister’s creative work of divvying up all the hosts, I would like to think it was the same as Jesus feeding such a large group of believers in the gospel story. As in scripture, we probably even had some left over!

Most importantly, this mass brought groups of strangers together. Even in a dusty campground, under tall trees, without a building or electricity, we were able to take part in the Eucharistic celebration. That is the gift of the Catholic faith.
Jen Payan

August 31, 2022 - Donating Life
Over my career in as a trauma nurse I’ve been able to witness the most precious gift one family can give another – organ donation. It is truly a spiritual experience simultaneously witnessing the loss and preservation of life. This is because it reminds me so much of the sacrifice that Jesus made for us on the cross.

Before Jesus, the Jewish faith required an animal sacrifice for the forgiveness of sins. When Jesus arrived on scene, he stated that he was going to change that tradition. He told us he would give his own life to atone for all our sins. God’s people would no longer have to use the sacrificial mediator for forgiveness. He gave us direct access to God’s forgiveness. He gifted us with a fresh start and literally a new life.  

I’m always reminded of this gesture when a tragic loss of life results in the saving of many lives. I’ve aided in procuring a new heart for a young father of 3 children, new lungs for a lady who had been struggling to breath for years, and a new kidney to a teen. This is always with immense gratitude for the dying and their family that made the decision to donate life. Do you have a little pink sticker on your driver’s license?
Jen Payan

September 1, 2022 - Impact of a Believer
As a young adult when I left home, faith was not my priority. I became so independent I felt that I didn’t even need God. Then, I found myself in a challenging job where I witnessed so much tragedy that I even questioned the existence of God. My spiritual and mental health suffered.

One day as I was in an ICU room caring for severely a injured teen that was dying, I overheard a remarkable conversation. The patient’s mother was speaking to a close friend at the bedside with her. She stated she had been overcome with so much anxiety and grief the day before that she could hardly function. Then she had gone home and just started praying. She was able to fall asleep that night and the next morning woke up with a huge sense of peace. She felt calm and able to face the terrible road ahead.

I had been quietly working on the IV pumps in the corner of the room. She probably never even realized that I was listening. But her words and actions changed my life. She brought me back to God. I realized that God had to be present in the world if he was able to bring peace to someone experiencing the worst situation imaginable. She will never know her impact. I often reflect on how my actions and speech regarding my faith can influence others without even being aware.
Jen Payan

September 2,  2022 - Who Are Your People?
As I have aged, I’ve learned the importance of friendship and fellowship. The quality and beliefs of those I surround me has made all the difference as I’ve faced the challenges in my life. I appreciate that God has surrounded me with friends that really fill my cup. I know He is always presenting me with people that I can connect with. Whether they are friends for life or a shorter period, they are of great value.
 
Occasionally, the time and closeness would be brief, but it always met a certain need in my life. Or maybe I was meant to be of help or service to them. Then there is an ebb and flow in a long-term friendship. Over the years I would be able to offer support and care to my best friend at times, then require just as much help from her in a difficult time of my own life. My bible study friends have been so special since we all share our faith.

No matter what, the friends that have surrounded me over the years certainly have been gifts from God and I am truly grateful.
Jen Payan

September 3, 2022 - Mary
Growing up my Grandma Eagle had a small Mary plaque that hung in her bedroom. When she passed away I chose to keep it as a remembrance of her. I remember bringing it home and walking around my house looking for the perfect place to hang it. I was drawn to a small wall near the closet in my daughter’s room. This was my “spirited” child that I always felt I needed a little more grace and patience with. This was the perfect spot for the Blessed Mother!

Shortly after hanging it up I returned home after a long day out and smelled something burning upstairs. I traced the smell to her room where I found some burned up pajamas hanging from a nightlight that was plugged into the wall. They must have been thrown unintentionally on the hot light as my daughter got dressed that morning. Fortunately, they had burnt themselves out and not caused a fire or any other damage. Suspended above the nightlight was the Mother Mary I had hung on that wall the day before!

Whether it was a miracle of just fire-retardant PJ’s I will never know. But, it reminded me how our Lady is watching over my family constantly. Even now, when I can’t be present with my children I know she is there protecting and interceding on our behalf. Thank you Mary!
Jen Payan

September 4, 2022 - Fire
For many years our family would camp on the south shore of Lake Tahoe for a few weeks every summer. We would enjoy hikes and mountain biking through the thick green forest. Then the Angora fire occurred. It destroyed homes and thousands of acres. The following summer it was heartbreaking to pedal through the desolate trails. The earth was barren with old ash and cinder and the forest had gone completely quiet without the birds and wildlife. It is eerie, but when I stopped my bike and took it all in, it was strangely peaceful. Almost like I had been transported to another planet. The following year, I returned for the ride and found some shoots of new trees emerging and small grassy areas with new plants. Each year as I rode the trail it grew lusher and the forest noises of wildlife and insects returned. After a period of years it returned to its original beauty with all new growth.

Scripture uses the example of purification by fire many times. Jesus even speaks of it. We also symbolize the Holy Spirit with it. My experience riding that trail in Tahoe was such a reminder of how the fire of our faith can help us get rid of the old and start anew. God has always made that available to us, especially with the help of the Holy Spirit.
Jen Payan

Reflections for Aug. 22-28, 2022
August 22, 2022 - A Walk with Christ
When you get together in the Cursillo movement it is customary to share your closest moment with Christ.  I’m not a big sharer, nor, I think, are a lot of people.  As a result, we hear of the closest moment as getting together with family, having the kids (or grandkids) visit, a special homily heard, maybe a trip to an impressive church.  Or in a rare sharing, you might hear something really touching.  What you don’t hear is of Jesus tapping you on the shoulder or running beside you in the turkey trot, carrying on a conversation.  

What is unsaid is the fact that the same men who shared about their family get-togethers went out of their way to pick up a guy who needs a walker to come to this meeting.  That they drive - on a regular basis - all the way from Davis to be part of our community.  That they leaned over to a loved one in church to tell them that they loved them.  To me, I feel as if I’ve truly encountered Christ when I am witness to these things -when I see our faith in action - It isn’t getting together with family so much as being Christlike yourself.  As Catholics, we know that Christ lives in us. We become His hands and feet.   And it is the realization that the small, loving things that I do for others on a regular basis is truly an extension of Christ working through me.  So I can honestly say that today, my closest moment with Christ is being among those who are indeed, the embodiment of Jesus.
Don Eagle

August 23, 2022 - Look Around
To me God is not “in heaven” so much as I feel that God is all around me.  He is in the beauty of a sunset, the majesty of a mountain, the serenity of a lake, and the eyes of a child.  The Romans simply put a different God in charge of most anything, whereas the Israelites had one God in charge of everything.  To us, He is all encompassing, everywhere, and everlasting.  In short, God is, as our hymn goes, “standing right beside me.”  From my first breath to my last, I feel that God is with me, no matter what.  There have been occasions in my life where I felt His presence more than others.   In college, I was involved in a terrible car accident.  Coming out of the Caldicot Tunnel, the Volkswagen I was riding in was sideswiped by an oncoming car, causing us to flip the car, skidding upside down to the edge of a steep embankment.  My date and I, as well as the driver and his date, managed to extract ourselves from the upside down car, and walk away virtually unscathed.  We should all have been killed, yet God was the fifth passenger in that vehicle. I think he had other plans for our future.  God was with us then and continues to be.  As a humorous aside, the first thing we did upon exiting the car was to turn the car radio off so we wouldn’t run down the battery (of the totally destroyed car)!
Don Eagle

August 24, 2022 - On This Note…
Pope John Paul II once said, “I have a sweet tooth for song and music.  This is my Polish sin.” Like the Pope, I too have a sweet tooth for music and it has always been a big part of my life.  I get spiritually lost when I listen to a great piece of music and feel an affinity towards God.  He is there from the overture to the finale.  He is there from the whisper to the crescendo.  From the deep notes of an alto to the high notes of a coloratura soprano, my whole being appreciates and loves the complexity involved.  The harmony of orchestral instruments, all working together, spell out the wonder of creation, the sense of God Himself.  I am inspired when I sit in the lap of God and feel the harmony of the universe, the bursting forth of spiritual energy, the joy of being.  To me, music is a gift that man gives back to God.  It is one of those rare gifts that enrich the soul and allows your spirit to soar. Just listen to the works of Mozart, Gabrielli or Charpentier.   Music is the hallmark of many occasions.  Think of the simple Happy Birthday song, graduation marches, wedding music, concerts, liturgical themes, and finally, to music played at a funeral.  When I think about it, music stands alone.  Enhancing, enchanting, embracing, and giving my spirit-filled life a decided boost.  I’m not too sure about all those harps in heaven, I’m hoping for a full-on orchestra, replete with a big choir and some really great soloists.  I’m hoping that Pavarotti, the Mormon Tabernacle Choir, and Toscanini will be performing when I finally get to see God’s face. (Well, maybe one harp will be okay).  
Don Eagle

August 25, 2022 - A Sailor’s Tale
To me, sailing is putting yourself in the hands of God as you voyage through life, quietly, confidently, with love and with purpose.  One of my very favorite images of God can be likened to sailing. This relationship has been to me, as like a child with a toy boat.  As an adult, I not only found joy in sailing, but had a very personal experience with God himself.  Think of it.  You are afloat on the sea,( life) in nothing but a small hull.  You are totally dependent on the wind (the breath of God) to move you, to get you going, skimming across a surface that hides danger below.  You use that wind to get to your destination.  And that wind fills your sails, refreshes you as you go.  You have a destination in mind, and the key to that destination is in discovering how to get there.  You need to know where to go, which direction to follow.  Enter the second person of the Trinity, showing you the way.  Knowing where your ultimate destination is, and having the help to get there, you realize that you are one with the Father.  It is you, and the Father, and the Son, driven by the Spirit, that fulfills your journey across the water.  The wind is quiet, yet you hear the rush of water against your hull.  You drive through the waves, experience the storms, but using your direction, you see where you are going.  When your sails are lowered, you arrive at your destination.  At peace, to enjoy the calm and serenity of your anchorage.  
Don Eagle

August 26,2022 - Camaraderie
Every year I attend the Men’s Day of Prayer sponsored by the men of St. Mel’s Parish.  It’s always well attended with several hundred men attending and hearing a dynamic guest speaker.  Attendees come from every corner of the diocese.  Last Spring Fr. Matthew Spencer was the guest speaker, a priest who has been close to our SS Peter & Paul for many years.  This year, his take on St. Joseph was both profound and enlightening.  Beyond the conference itself, I always come away with a deeper meaning imbedded in such meetings.  Aside from learning and taking notes, I am always impressed with the brotherhood of the men attending.  Beyond the handshakes and hugs, there is a commonality of belief, a sense of purpose, a feeling of mutual love of one another, all which lead to strong Catholic community.  I have experienced new-found friendships that stretch across many Diocesan parishes, men who have found they are not alone in their beliefs, and yearn to discover their inherent Christian being. Our common goals are summed up in the Cursillo statement to “Find a friend, be a friend, and bring a friend to Christ” through piety, study, and action. Those are the watchwords, and, discovering that we are not alone, the camaraderie engendered at these get-togethers is the underlying feeling I get beyond the event itself.  
Don Eagle

August 27, 2022 -  Sun Shines Forth
Granted, It’s a simple song.  And yet it is so meaningful (at least to me) because it spells out both a spiritual reckoning and one that deals with personal relationships.  
            You are my sunshine
            My only sunshine.
            You make me happy
            When skies are gray
            You’ll never know dear how much I love you,
            Please don’t take my sunshine away.
What starts out as a fun tune quickly switches into one of commitment, love, and fear.  The words are actually quite stirring, and I envision God in every line.  The same goes for feelings toward my wife.  Funny how the two are inextricably entwined, and how those words bounce off of each, enhancing the other.  This little ditty speaks of our relationship with God from the time of our birth until the curtain falls.  It also speaks of the person who makes our life complete, and of how deep love grows, confessing that life would be incomplete without her.  (Or him, as the case may be). 

 If I look at this song as a sort of prayer, I read into it that God is all around me, bringing joy to my life, and being ever at my side.  And I, in turn, love Him and always want him with me.  
If I look at this song as an expression of my feelings toward my wife, I complete the picture of mutual love and support, never wanting it to end.
Don Eagle

August 28, 2022 - Quiet Time
In a world filled with ever-increasing noise, how wonderful it is to unplug, and experience the sweetness of quiet.  Cell phones, messaging, emails, robocalls, direct mail and the direct exposure to 3,000 messages a day deprive one of the time to sit back and think, pray, and contemplate.  I find that reflecting on spiritual things is heavily compromised by the constant barrage of others seeking your attention, support, or distraction.  I’m thinking that the church has long recognized the power of solitude, of solitary prayer, and of the rapture of focus.  Monks, hermits, and cloistered women have all discovered the value of losing themselves in the mysteries of God.  

Jesus began his ministry by prayer and reflection — alone, communing with the Father.  And, throughout the New Testament, He withdraws to be alone to pray, even to the final Garden of Gethsemane prayer. 
I personally think that withdrawing, seeking solitude and time to think, is a real must for spiritual health.  I love to turn off my cell phone, let the robocalls go unanswered, and dump the direct mail solicitations in the wastebasket.  I’d much rather use my brain to think of loftier things. I’d really prefer to contemplate a life that is giving in a spiritual sense.  Quietly, listening and not talking.  And I am reminded now and then of how God appeared — not in the thunder, not in the earthquake nor the fire, but in a tiny whispering sound.
Don Eagle

Reflections for Aug. 15-21, 2022
August 15, 2022 -As Needed

My wife and I eat an almost exclusively plant-based diet.  This reminded me of a proverb from 1826: 'Tell me what you eat and I will tell you what you are', which we hear as, ‘You are what you eat’.  Thinking about this, I realized that the wisdom of this goes beyond the plate or palate.  I am, or more correctly, I become, what I consume.  For health considerations, this is well described.  If I eat high calorie low fiber foods, with plenty of sugar, salt, and fat I will develop medical problems.  If children or the elderly do not get sufficient protein, they will either not grow or dwindle faster. 

But how about the other things I consume?  My society is often referred to as a consumer economy.  I consume energy, natural resources, and manufactured goods.   I ask myself whether I am consuming to keep my body and mind strong, to serve others, express my faith and live a Christian life, or am I addicted to consuming.  What do I consume as entertainment when I read, listen, or watch?   Do I consume because it gives me pleasure or provide a sense of security and power or do I consume only as needed to be a healthy member of the Body of Christ?  Do I consume while others of God’s children do not have merely enough to survive?  Do I figuratively consume their lives for my own?  As I go about my day today, I will ask myself, ‘What have I become?’ 
Ray Frink

Aug. 16, 2022 - Buffalo and Penguins

Lately I’ve been trying to hear God in my life.  I believe He is there; I just want some clarity.   This is not the first time, nor the last time, I will do this.  I am trying to expand my daily prayer, hear the whisper of His voice, or see a sign.  I am seeking instruction in dealing with the storms, great and small, of life.  As is often the case, two examples from nature showed me how to address my current storms.

These two examples involve buffalo, cows, and penguin chicks.  When a storm is approaching over the Great Plains the storm usually comes from the west and moves to the east. Cows and buffalo go in opposite directions.   Cows flee before the storm and since they are slow, they actually move along with the storm and prolong their discomfort and pain.  Trying to escape the storm only worsens their condition.  Buffalo turn and charge the storm, moving toward the storm and shortening the time the storm controls their lives.  God in nature tells me there are times I need to charge the storm. 

During a cold and windy winter penguin chicks huddle in mass to protect themselves from the cold.  Chicks in the interior move to the outside and outside chicks move to the interior regularly so that all are protected most of the time. God in nature tells me there are times when I need my spiritual community to protect me and times when I protect them.
Ray Frink

August 17, 2022 - Missing You

I am often asked if I miss actively practicing medicine.  Family members and close friends think I still do because I say “the shingle is always out”, a reference to the old routine of a newly minted doctor hanging a sign or ‘shingle’ to advertise their presence.  I take calls about medicine from family at all hours.

My answer to missing medicine is always the same.  I miss the people: my patients, my medical coworkers, and the non-medical support staff including the environmental staff.  When I heard that one of our SS. Peter and Paul staff tries to smile at everyone she encounters, I adopted this for the hospital and office cleaners.  I miss them because they most appreciated the simple recognition a smile brought.  They were not invisible to me and I appreciated the thorough, necessary, and usually thankless, jobs they did. 
          Jesus was always concerned about the people.  Did they have enough to eat.?  Did they understand what He was saying?  Did they receive the spiritual guidance they deserved from the clergy of the time?  In scripture, after his encounter with the Samaritan women we read of Jesus healing many, probably to the point of exhaustion. Jesus healed without regard to position or station in life.  There was no seeking influence or good will from those He cured.  For Jesus, the most genuine expression of Himself, was to feed, teach, cure, love.  May I have the wisdom and strength to remember these four goals.
Ray Frink

August 18, 2022 - Change the Script
In the world of television, Captain Kirk of Star Trek provides an example of overcoming.  A recurring commentary is how Captain Kirk survived a test with an absolutely no-win scenario.  He alters the computer program.  He is accused of cheating.  His response is: “I changed the conditions of the test”, or as I say, he changed the script. 
       
If I have learned anything about sin or acting in a way I would prefer to avoid, it is that these acts tend to repeat themselves.   Most are private.  Sin is more often personal.  These are not on the front page of the Sacramento Bee.   
         
Advice that I recently heard given to a teenager on the avoidance of sin stayed with me.  I paraphrase the advice:  If you can identify a pattern of thought, emotion, or behavior that occurs before you act, then change the script.  This simple advice is not easy.  It requires reflection, planning, and commitment.  It requires recognition of what those triggers may be that start me down the path.  Then there is the moment-to-moment decision to change course, to redirect my energy away from sin, and toward a better choice, use of time, or avoidance of temptation.  There is the possibility of failure because often it is easier to follow a familiar path.   These moments of choice are made a little easier with prayer, a quick reminder that the needed extra bit of strength is available.
Ray Frink

August 19, 2022 - Preserve, Protect, and Defend
From previous reflections some readers