If you would like to receive these daily reflections (written by various parishioners) in your email box each day, contact darcy.wharton@rocklincatholic.org
We are now selling a year's worth of our own parishioner's Daily Reflections in a wonderful book entitled, "The Chimes". You can purchase a copy in the parish office for $5. Makes a great gift!
Reflections for March 18-24, 2024
March 18, 2024 - FOMO and Ego
I was the very youngest in my family. My sisters were twelve and fourteen years older than me which meant that they could do things that I could not, and they could do everything better than I could. My oldest sister was good with artsy/craftsy things, while my older sister had a good singing voice. I struggled to find what I was good at, experiencing the “Fear Of Missing Out” not just of fun things, but of talent. When I started school I realized that I was “smart” and it became important for me to excel in class. Later I loved the theology classes and the spiritual training Deacon David and I experienced in preparing as Lay Missionaries to Africa and for the diaconate. I took pleasure in discussing spiritual topics with others and using the spiritual exercises to become a better person. And that was my goal, you see, to be a better person. There is nothing wrong with that, but I realized that I had made it about my persona rather than about God. I realized this early on and struggled from that point on with being what I called “a professional good person” which included offering everything up to God but that is still different from being the presence of Christ in the world. So I say Thomas Merton's Prayer of the Seeker: “…I believe that the desire to please You does in fact please You. And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing…”
Jane Haproff
March 19, 2024 - In the Tomb
During Lent the Church encourages us to use increased prayer and sacrifice as a way to walk with Jesus through the Paschal Mysteries. I have done this in various ways: giving up candy as a child, wine as an adult, going to daily Mass, etc. Often I felt closer to God, but not always. There were times when prayer felt empty and became a chore and a sacrifice. I accept this now as another way to experience the Paschal mysteries: to be in the tomb with Jesus.
In the Creed we say that Jesus “descended into hell …”. this means that “…Jesus, like all men, experienced death and in his soul joined the others in the realm of the dead”. (CC 633) And hell is defined as the complete absence of the vision of God. We believe Jesus did this to bring salvation to the righteous waiting there. I don’t know how to think about this. Jesus, the Son of God, certainly knew what he was doing but can you imagine what all of this must have felt like to Jesus the man? Did Jesus, the man, know that his brutal death was actually the gateway to a new life? Did he understand that the sojourn into hell was temporary, that he would see the glory of God again? I think of the faith and the love that the man Jesus must have had for God…the absolute and complete trust while in that place of desolation. When I think of that, I can wait in darkness for the Resurrection.
Jane Haproff
March 20, 2024 – Resurrection and Life
Several of my friends have lost a loved one recently. These people are good Catholics who embrace the teachings of the Church. Yet grief, loss, loneliness can raise questions. One friend just lost her only sister and asked, “what if what we believe is not true?” Who of us has not asked similar questions in the night for one reason or another? So I thought about this.
In addition to new life being around us everywhere this time of year, as well as in the lives of people we know who have risen from seemingly impossible circumstances, there is another place in the natural world to experience hope: in an oxygen molecule. Most of the oxygen molecules that we breath in and out so unthinkingly have existed since the beginning of time. This means that the oxygen I breathe in is most probably the same oxygen breathed by my loved ones but in addition, possibly by Jesus, himself. Imagine…Jesus’ actual breath possibly sustaining my life and energy. This is not theoretical or theological; this is science…So life does not end, it merely changes form, and this is reason enough for me to live in the hope of the Resurrection.
Thank you, Father, for creating a world that is so full of your presence. Jane Haproff
March 21, 2024 - Prayer
Believe it or not, my cell phone has provided me with more than one spiritual insight. The latest one has to do with the word games I play on it. First of all I love puzzles, figuring things out, making connections, etc. all of which happen while playing some of the games on my phone. In doing this I have experienced the phenomenon of interrupted thinking. When I am stumped and cannot find the answer that fits, I leave the game and do something else. When I return to the game later, the answer is often right in front of me. Why couldn’t I see it before?
I think prayer can be like this. It is a way to interrupt my thinking, to move me to another realm where logic does not dominate. Some call this right brain thinking, but I don’t experience it as a particular function of the brain. Rather it feels more like emptying myself, consciously relinquishing control of solutions and deciding to trust what I cannot understand. I wish I could say that when I do this the answer is as obvious as it is in my word games. It is not! But there is peace in acknowledging that I am not in control and that One who loves me is.
Jane Haproff
March 22, 2024 - The Dark Night of the Soul
Several weeks ago the moon was barely visible; just a tiny sliver in the sky. Yet I knew with certainty that the moon was there, shadowed by the earth. St. John of the Cross used that kind of experience or awareness as a metaphor for the dark night of the soul to describe the union that can occur between God and the soul in prayer. For him, the darkness was an intense immersion in God and a willingness to stay in the darkness knowing it led to the light. In the popular culture the dark night has come to mean undergoing a dark and/or terrible time in one’s life. I guess both of those definitions fit what Jesus must have gone through in Gethsemane. For me that sliver of a moon reminded me that I cannot always see the will of God, or even at times the presence of God, but I know with certainty that He is there. But when this happens I don’t feel immersed in God as Jesus was and I’m not keen to stay in the darkness like John of the Cross was, but I love the reminder that He is there, rather here…in all things whether or not I see Him clearly or understand His purpose. And this is what is missing in the popular culture’s definition…God really is here in all things.
Jane Haproff
March 23, 2024 – One Body in Christ
Recently an old foot injury acted up and it became painful to put any weight on it. Usually the pain subsided when I sat or laid down. But one particular night I awoke to discomfort and couldn’t sleep. In the sacrament of the sick we pray that the sick person receives the strength to unite themselves to Christ’s Passion and thus participate in his saving work. Though I had not received the sacrament of the sick, I liked the idea of uniting myself with Christ’s suffering, thinking that it would give me spiritual comfort. It didn’t; I could not sustain the idea that I was suffering with Christ. Then I considered all of the terrible suffering that must be going on in the world that night: bombings, deaths, earthquakes, floods, torture, depression. I imagined it all contained in one big bubble called suffering. Then I wondered if I could redistribute the suffering; take just a little of it away from the one suffering the most and add it to the discomfort of my foot. I could handle that, and it might relieve another person just a tiny bit. And what if they knew I did that…might it not help them also to know someone was thinking of them? So I prayed that I could take some of the suffering from just one person. My foot did not hurt any worse, but a strange thing happened: I felt united with Christ, who bore the suffering of us all. We are one body, one body in Christ. Jane Haproff
March 24, 2024 – Confusion
Imagine how Mary must have felt as Jesus came into Jerusalem to the accolades and cries of joy that day, now known as Palm Sunday. Mary had said yes to the angel, allowing herself to become part of God’s plan for salvation. She knew the child she bore was of God, and then he was born in a stable. She must have wondered at this. She agreed to flee with Joseph to Egypt though again she must have wondered why God didn’t intervene. We don’t know much about Jesus’ childhood and early years, but Mary didn’t just believe that her son was extraordinary, she knew it. And she knew that at some point in time things would not be ordinary. She must have been a bundle of nerves that first Palm Sunday. As a mother she would have been happy that her son was so joyfully acclaimed. On the other hand she must have been nervous that so much attention was being paid to him in a politically dangerous manner. And then there was Calvary. I wonder what she was thinking then. At every point those last days, was she looking around hoping to find God ready to intervene? And what were her prayers like after the crucifixion? Did she feel betrayed? Or did she have such confidence in God’s promise that she was at peace? It’s hard to imagine what she went through as the crowds yelled “Hosannah”. And it’s hard to know how I will answer Mary when she asks, “Were you there when they crucified my son?” Jane Haproff
Reflections for March 11-17, 2024
March 11, 2024—Blind Spots and Imperfections
In yesterday’s Gospel, we heard the story of the man born blind. The Pharisees asked Jesus, “Why was this man born blind? Was it his sin or the sin of his parents?” Jesus answered it was neither. He says, “This was born blind in order to show forth the glory of God.”
As I read this gospel story for perhaps the umpteenth time, I recalled a contestant who competed on the TV show, Master Chef, hosted by Gordon Ramsey. The contestant was Christine Ha, the first blind contestant to compete, and win the coveted Master Chef title and trophy (and a lot of cash, too). Christine went on to write a cookbook, open a restaurant and be a judge on Master Chef Vietnam.
We may not suffer from blindness, but I think we all have our blind spots and imperfections. These can embitter us or we can use them “to show forth the glory of God.” God can’t do anything with us if we are perfect. Only in our blindness or ____________ (you can fill in the blank) that we are enabled to live each day to the fullest and show forth the glory of God.
Bob Leathers
March 12, 2024—Martin Luther King, Jr.
In December, my wife, Cindy, and I visited the Martin Luther King, Jr. National Park in Atlanta, Georgia. The site includes his birthplace, the church—Ebenezer Baptist Church—where he and his father served as pastor, the burial site for Dr. King and his wife, and educational exhibits. As a park ranger described the history and notable services in the church, I felt overwhelmed as I imagined being present for one of Dr. King’s sermons and his funeral. What caught my attention even more were his six principles of nonviolence:
Nonviolence…
March 4-10, 2024
March 4, 2024 - Choose Your Hard
I recently read an inspirational quote that said - "Choose your hard." One example stood out to me: "Being overweight is hard. Being fit is hard. Choose your hard." I have been on a weight loss journey for about a year now with lots of ups and downs. When I began, I had doubts about whether I would be successful as I had tried many other things previously. I began with the mindset of baby steps, knowing I had a lot of mental work to contend with regarding my eating habits. I have been successful until recently when I have plateaued. I still have more to do to reach my goal and I feel like I am right at the summit where it is easy to give in. I am scratching my head thinking of what else I may need to do to get me to the top of this mountain and a few things stand out. It is no longer hard for me to find alternative(s) to what I prefer to eat and I am taking for granted where I started. One of the main components of my weight loss is to have a strong why statement to refer to when times get tough along the way. It is a way to ground myself in stopping, choosing, and challenging what I am doing. I have yet to come up with one that resonates for me which I believe is contributing to my plateau and slight increase in my weight recently. And I wonder how this struggle might extend to my spiritual life. Bianca Hennager
March 5, 2024 - Choose Your Hard, Part 2
When I am struck by life's challenges and get overwhelmed, I pause and think about what I may be doing to contribute to this feeling of being overwhelmed. What other actions can I take to help me through my current state? Have I offered up my feeling(s) to God and do I work to let my fears rest at his feet? I tend to refer back to the idea of choose your hard -- and I think about what I can do to help in the immediate moment. I can choose to let go of all my expectations and rely on God - that is hard. Bu so is holding on to expectations, thinking that I can handle it all on my own without God - chose your hard. I can trust God in ways that challenge me in areas where I have shut him out or I can continue to work hard at making things work without bringing God into the mix - choose your hard. Life is hard and can only be made easier with more reliance on God, allowing him to transform me while I struggle. I pray during this Lenten season that I choose my hard with a heart towards inviting God into my life to help me with my hard. And that we all recognize the need to do the same.
Bianca Hennager
March 6, 2024 - Poverty of Preference
March 7, 2024 - What's in a Name
I had a quirky nickname from my childhood that was given to me as a joke but stuck. I was in elementary school and my sister had a family nickname that my parents often called her. I remember she even had a beautiful gold necklace with her nickname printed on it. I was a bit envious of such accolades and wanted something similar. I remember asking my dad why I didn't have a family nickname like my older sister and he boldly declared my name would be "Fred". At first, I didn't like the name and thought it repugnant. I wanted something magical and expressive - not Fred. Despite my indignation at the name, he continued to call me that through the years. The name stuck so much that I had that name embroidered on my varsity jacket. The nickname has become more meaningful to me over the years and now I can smile about. It was my dad’s way of connecting with me in a different way than he did with my sister, differentiating between us as two unique individuals needing our own distinct nicknames. Bianca Hennager
March 8, 2024 - The Shema Prayer
And you shall love Adonai your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your might.I learned of the shema when I studied Hebrew Scriptures in High School. This prayer has served as a central focal point in my relationship with God. In today's Gospel Jesus recites the Shema Prayer and adds in "love your neighbor as yourself". This prayer calls me to think about how I am ordered and focused on God and my neighbor. Do I love with all my heart and soul? Do I love with all my strength and mind? Do I set aside time to listen to God's voice or to reflect on how God is working in life? Do I listen to my neighbor when they have a transgression or am I patiently waiting to respond? It is such a deep contemplation that calls me to do more than reflect but to act --- love is an action. How I show love to my neighbor comes in many different ways, namely with some act of sacrifice on my part out of charity for my neighbor. Lord let me love you in ways to which you call me even when it isn't convenient. Let me call upon the Shema to be reminded of my covenant with you: to love you with all my heart, with all my soul, with all my mind, and with all my strength and to love my neighbor as myself. Bianca Hennager
March 9, 2024. - The Good Mother Necessarily Fails
I am in a new stage of parenting, having adult children and elementary aged children. One of my adult children lives away at college and the time spent away continues to lengthen to where we might only see him twice a year. I have been struggling with feeling insignificant and that I no longer matter to my adult children. I know that is not the case, but it is hard when your children who depended on you for everything are now out of the house living independently. I now act as more of a consultant than a director and that is quite different. I watched a recent clip where Jordan Peterson said, "the good mother necessarily fails" and was comforted a little bit by his explanation. The ways our children need us when they are younger are not the same as they get older. I have worked hard to instill a sense of self- sufficiency and independence in my children, but now that they have grown and are living that independence and self-sufficiency it is difficult not getting the same level of interaction / dependence that once was there. I pray daily for each of my children and pray that as I enter into these new seasons of life I can be more at peace with a sense of "failing" and watching them take flight. I wonder if Mary ever felt this way. Bianca Hennager
March 10, 2024 - Rejoice Sunday
As we embark on the last few weeks of Lent, let today and each day moving towards Easter draw us closer to loving God, loving our neighbor, and detaching ourselves from selfish desires while attaching ourselves closer to the will of God. Bianca Hennager
February 26, 2024 - The Dawn Sky
Growing up on a large piece of property in the country gave me some incredible experiences. My parents allowed my older brothers to take me “camping” overnight on the upper portion of our property when I was about 8 years old. We went out after dinner with our sleeping bags, far from the lights of our house and simply slept under the stars. With my brothers close by I felt secure. I remember this being my first experience watching the moon rise and the sky fill with stars from my warm sleeping bag. Throughout the night I would wake up and see how the sky had changed and observe it slowly warm with color as the dawn arrived. I was so amazed at how the smallest amount of light started changing the night sky. It was a transformative experience.
Since then, my experiences with the night sky haven’t been nearly as magical. The times I’ve witnessed dawn have been coming off a long night shift working or tending to one of my children during the wee hours of the morning. I’ve been too tired or impatient to experience the wonder. How lovely it had been to witness the dawn and night sky in their purest form with no distractions when I was a child. Is this what my relationship with God is often like? Am I missing out on the wonder and beauty of God because of the distractions of life?
Jen Payan
February 27, 2024 - The ICU Makeover
Over my many years working in the adult ICU, I often cared for patients who were admitted in terrible states of hygiene. Sometimes they had been living on the streets or were just unable to care for themselves. My co-workers and I always immediately jumped in to remedy the problem. Together we would bath, shampoo, and shave our patients. Many of us stocked our own shampoo and conditioner in our lockers. I even stashed a pair of quality scissors for haircuts in mine!
We often viewed this as just part of our job, steps to improve our patients’ health and speed up recovery. When I reflect on this now, I see so much more to this caregiving act. As a nurse, one can feel so helpless at another person’s situation. It was our way of giving some dignity back to our patients. This transformation process not only helped the patient feel better it aided us in taking control of what feels like a helpless situation. Our patients had such complex medical and social issues that we were never going to be able to change and it could be very frustrating.
This reminds me how important it is to intervene wherever and however, no matter how small the gesture, when I see someone in need.
Jen Payan
February 28, 2024 - Under the Microscope
My daughter is in her first year of teaching high school. I’m enjoying hearing her experiences; both good and bad. One of the things she shared with me is how exhausting it is being “on stage” every day. It seems that the kids are so in tune and critical of her every move, whether it is what she says or what she is wearing.
Recently, my parents handed me a box of my high school work. In it I found a daily journal that I was required to write in for my English class. My teacher, Ms. Winegar would read the entries and comment on them. I found it hilarious that many of my entries included little notes to my teacher, complimenting her outfits or commenting on the stories she shared. She sweetly always thanked me and complimented me on my writings. She was always my favorite teacher and I still remember many of the books and discussions in that class. Plus, she made me feel special during that rough teenage time in my life.
I was sure to share that with my exhausted daughter. I know that she is going to be that special teacher to many of her students. God has given her the amazing gift of teaching, and she is “killing it!” God bless all of the teachers in our lives!
Jen Payan
February 29, 2024 - Staying Onboard
Recently my women’s group was studying the book of Acts. There is a memorable story where Paul is aboard a ship sailing to Rome. They encounter a huge storm and must throw supplies overboard; they even have to bind the boat together as it was falling apart. Paul discovers the staff of the boat trying to disembark on a life raft, essentially leaving those remaining on the ship to die. Paul knows that both the passengers and the occupants of the lifeboat will die without each other. He encourages them to stay on the ship, even though they are terrified. Paul was completely confident in God’s plan. He knew that despite any difficulties, they would make it to Rome, because the Lord had assured him.
They end up ship wrecked but alive on the island of Malta. They are greeted warmly by the citizens and actually end up having a pretty nice island vacation! In addition, most of the population is converted to Christianity.
This story made me reflect on the times when I’m scared and ready to give up, even at the cost of letting others down. I am encouraged to stay on board, even if I’m being tossed and turned. My hope lies in God’s promise, and possibly an island vacation!
Jen Payan
March 1, 2024 - The Rosary
Growing up Catholic, I experienced the Rosary in many ways. Of course, my first memories were always associated with boredom. I remember wiggling around in my desk in the second-grade reciting what seemed like endless Hail Marys. As a child, it seemed like the longest 15 minutes of my life! As a grew up I observed both grandmothers reverently saying the rosary before bed and couldn’t understand why they didn’t just want to watch TV. I was unnerved when my mother would pray the Rosary while my dad was driving. Was he really that bad of a driver?
My attitude seemed to change as I transitioned into adulthood. Some of my first experiences with the death of a loved one included the rosary. We would gather the evening before the funeral and pray the Rosary together and I experienced the comfort of the Blessed Mother during that difficult time. Also, I realized my dad was actually a really good driver. My mom had figured out a way to meditate and pray in her limited time, adding a special blessing and protection during our trips in the car.
Currently, I have a friend who is sharing with me the comfort and joy she has found in the Rosary. I’m working on using the prayer to quiet my thoughts and relax my body. I’m seeing what a wonderful gift the Rosary is to bring me closer to God and illuminate my prayer life.
Jen Payan
March 2, 2024 - Hurdles
I remember an instance way back in high school when I was running the hurdles. I clipped one on my way over, tangling myself up in the hurdle scraping my knees and elbows simultaneously as I hit the ground. I was so embarrassed that I immediately got up and limped over the last hurdles, finishing the race way behind all of the other girls. To my surprise, the crowd gave the biggest cheer for me as I crossed the finish line and my teammates surrounded me with hugs and pats of pride on my back. My heart was full, and I wore bloodied knees and arms as a badge of honor. My perseverance in a time of humiliation and discomfort ended up bringing me great joy.
Recently, my bible study class has been studying spiritual wisdom and the value of perseverance. James shares that wisdom is achieved though perseverance and it should be considered pure joy. Is this what happened to me on the hurdles that day?
James 1:2-4: Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.
Jen Payan
March 3, 2024 - The Prize Ladybug
When my middle daughter was about 6 years old I entered her in a kids’ one mile “fun run” race. When the starting gun fired, she shot off into the lead. I was running with her and encouraging her. She remained in first place well into a half mile without anyone close behind her. I was pretty amazed at her effortless pace. Suddenly she stopped. She had spotted a ladybug on a branch adjacent to the course we were running. She carefully tried to catch the small insect. I desperately tried to get her running again, telling her how she was winning the race and how far ahead she was. One by one the other children started running past her while she gently held the ladybug trying to show me her beautiful prize. I was losing my mind! I couldn’t understand how she could let others just pass her up and win when clearly, she was the fastest!
What a reminder about the world’s values versus God’s values. It takes the innocence of a child to demonstrate this. She saw no value in winning or prizes but chose an opportunity to enjoy a special moment in nature. It sounds so simple to chose joy and wonder over earthly prizes; why is it so hard for me?
Jen Payan
Reflecctions for Feb. 19-25, 2024
February 19, 2024 - Mosaics
I recently came across the word “mosaics,” a word that translates beyond the world of art and to the spirituality of life itself. Mosaics is the art of piecing together colorful tiles to form an image. When pieced together, the finalized piece of art is a sum of all its parts that can tell an exotic and moving story. Mosaic art also has a long and rich history in the Catholic Church, dating back to the earliest Christian communities.
A while back I zeroed in on relationships that became steppingstones along life’s way. This made me think of how the word mosaics takes on a special meaning when you consider your life, your soul, and all the pieces that make you, you. An individual tile tells me nothing. But all of those colorful tiles, once assembled, tell a story, depict an event, or paint a portrait. I think of my life as a mosaic, filled with colors, designs, stories, enhancements and muted tiles, and the aggregate is a permanent record of the created work. When God looks in his big book and reads my pages, I think he’s looking at a mosaic. Steppingstones may be the forward motion of our relationships throughout life, but a mosaic reflects the beauty of the soul in the summation of a life. What a great picture of a life lived.
Don Eagle
February 20, 2024 - Ah Lent
Lent is an important time in the Church. When I was small, my mother encouraged my brother and me to give up something for Lent. The usual give-up thing to sacrifice was candy. Not too much was said directly about fasting, but what eight-year-old fasts anyway? Historically, early Christians kept a strict, unbroken fast either on Good Friday, or during that period between the death on the cross and the resurrection. The duration of lent varied until the Roman church under Pope Gregory settled on 40 days. This figure reflected the time of the fasting and temptation of Christ, the 40 days spent by Moses and Elijah in the wilderness, and the 40 days of grace Jonah was given to spare Ninevah. As I’ve grown older, the church has encouraged other ways to partake in Lent, and “giving up” has instead changed to doing positive things. This includes things like helping out in charitable organizations, spending time serving in a soup kitchen, and practicing positive deeds with others. Still personal fasting has always been a key element of lent. Jesus himself said “the day will come when the bridegroom shall be taken away from them and then they shall fast in those days.” And from those beginnings, fasting and penitence became a personal journey through the Lenten season. Such is the history of Lent from it’s beginnings to today. I’m not too sure if I’ll give up candy this Lent, maybe I’ll give up reading the news.
Don Eagle
February 21, 2024 - Of Many Colors
Colors have meaning all to themselves. The Virgin Mary is usually identified with blue, a color associated with calm. Jesus is usually depicted in red, a color of sincerity and fire, (Joseph in brown, a color that never dominates,) purple depicts royalty, yellow with new life, and the list goes on and on. If you think about it, those colors are so predominate in Holy Week that subliminally, they are telling you a story within a story: The purple of the (royal) robe they put on Jesus , the purple of authority worn by Pilate, the green and yellow of Easter and new beginnings and new growth, the gray calmness and grief of Mary, the color of blood and the extinguishing of the fire within, even the multi-colored rooster that Peter encountered. All of these colors were translated into the art of the church, helping to tell the story of new beginnings, royalty, kingship, sincerity, and divinity. Colored windows let the light of Christ shine through in a way that resonated with man’s inherent sense of the mood created by different colors.
As humans, we react to the blue in the sky, the green in the earth, the red in the sunset, the yellow of the daffodil. On a deeper level, those colors become part of our symbolic association with stories and events themselves. Our lives are made up of a mosaic of events, experiences, joys and sorrow. They are enhanced by the colors of God’s rainbow. We are all colorful indeed.
Don Eagle
February 22, 2023 - The Foot Washing
Lent begins with the placing of ashes on your forehead. From Old Testament times, ashes were a sign of grief and mourning. The ashes are derived from burning palm branches that were blessed on Palm Sunday a year earlier. The visible sign of ashes on the forehead Indicates a public penance and an admonition that “we are dust, and unto dust we shall return.”
The next congregant event is Palm Sunday, but it is on Holy Thursday of Holy Week that Jesus demonstrates his commandment to “love one another” by washing his apostles’ feet. Today, we carry on this tradition by washing the feet of fellow congregants.
The Mass of the Last Supper is also when the priest wears white vestments in commemoration of the institution of the Eucharist. A few other things you don’t want to miss are the ringing of the bells during the Gloria (the bells are not rung again until Easter vigil), and no kiss of peace —because it is reminiscent of the betrayal of Judas. At the close, the Eucharist is removed to a side altar, usually bedecked with flowers that remind us of the garden of Gethsemane. This little primer illustrates how the Last Supper is loaded with symbolism and meaning. It may not be your usual meditation or reflection, but celebrating this event is always a huge part of the Lenten experience to me. In it, you find the themes of humility, loyalty, love, loneliness, and of course, sadness at the impending crucifixion on Good Friday.
Don Eagle
February 23, 2024 - Lent Revisited
When you read this, we will be in the early part of Lent. We have just a little over a month until Easter. Still plenty of time to reflect, repent, restrain, serve, and ultimately rejoice. Many, many, many years ago, my mom would take my brother and me shopping for new Easter clothes and get herself a new dress as well. It really didn’t matter if we had new clothes or not, because we always served Mass on Easter Sunday, and were covered up with altar boy cassocks and surplices. We always felt privileged to be on the sanctuary side of the altar railing and hold the patten while the priest delivered hosts to congregants. I even got to ring the bell once. People dressed up in their Sunday best, the choir sang, our Priest (s) loved big processions, and we altar boys memorized the Latin responses, not knowing what they meant. But no worries, Easter was a time of spring, of new growth, and inward and outward joy. The magic of Christmas was nothing compared to the wonder of Easter. You felt renewed, were able to eat candy again and had Jesus in your heart. Snow had melted, summer was coming.
Things are a whole lot different today, but there remains a gladness, a fulfillment, and meaning. There’s a lot of “no longer” there, we can understand what our priest tells us, we celebrate together, and as we get older, we continually learn.
I’m hoping that Lent is powerful and meaningful to you, and that your Easter is especially joyful.
Don Eagle
February 24, 2024 - Loss
We lose many things during the course of our lives, but thankfully, St. Anthony is there to help find them. How many things have I lost and after prayers to St. Anthony, the item is suddenly found?
St. Anthony was assigned to deliver a sermon in the year 1221. That sermon launched his career as a preacher. He was assigned to preaching all over Italy and was sensationally successful. His sermons were eloquent and persuasive, and he became a phenomenal converter and confessor. He died at the age of 36, and was canonized the following year by Pope Gregory IX. Anthony became a Doctor of the Church, known more for his speaking abilities than for helping me to find lost articles.
But getting back to lost things, and how grateful that I am for finding them, I think of things we lose that can never be found. This week I found out about the death of a Navy friend, and it touched me deeply. The losses of loved ones or those who have touched our lives can be devastating. On an ongoing basis we are seeing a rise in the incidence of dementia and Alzheimer’s disease, something in ourselves or someone we love that is lost and cannot be recovered. The changes to our lives caused by physical, mental, or spiritual loss can be deep. Thank you, Lord, for the gifts of faith, hope and trust in you for the things which we cannot recover, and for the gift of gratitude for that which we can recover.
Don Eagle
February 25, 2024 - Questions
My wife and I recently attended the parish mission, eager to hear our very own priest, Fr. Mike Ritter, return to his home parish of SS Peter & Paul. It was wonderful to see him again. Several hundred people who attended must have felt the same way as Fr. Mike prompted a series of questions, including the all-important one of God asking Adam and Eve “where are you,” and then bringing that question home to modern day Catholics. The next two evenings were further questions, and prompted me to share with you a question that I revere since I ran across it while exploring John (1-38). Andrew and a companion asked Jesus, “Where are you staying?” And He said to them: “Come, and you will see.” For me, Jesus’ response to that question is an invitation to learn, to open my heart to discover the teachings of the Rabbi. Well, Andrew went back to Simon (Peter,) his brother, and told him “We have found the Messiah” (the anointed one). Chapter one closes with Jesus telling another disciple, Philip, to “follow me,” and Philip telling Nathaniel “come and see.”
Not only was I challenged to examine my own psyche to attempt to answer the “where are you “ question, but I was equally eager to ask my own “where are you going’” and to be told by Jesus himself to “come and see.” The people in the pews left the parish mission to explore a host of questions, but these two thoughts resonated with me, and I am grateful for them both.
Don Eagle
Reflections for Feb. 12-18, 2024
Monday February 12, 2024- Cinderfella
Ironically, one of my favorite scripture passages is Mark 1:35: “Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed.” This scripture speaks in contrast to my behavior. This passage calls me to find the time and place, free of distraction, where discernment is possible. What I then do will not only be meaningful, but also in God’s plan.
Ray Frink
Tuesday February 13, 2024 - My Poster
In Apollo 13 three men carried the curiosity and courage of a planet into the darkness of space seeking knowledge and new horizons. Then the unanticipated happened. The famous line, “Houston, we have a problem” was a call for help to a myriad of individuals. Some worked the problem, some prayed. The needs of three men forged a community dedicated to preserving life. When I volunteer at the Yolo Food Bank the faces of people who come to food distributions are many more than three. I give my time, talent, and treasure to them and in other ways work to preserve life, sentient or not. Most often I determine when, where, and what that should be. Christ asks that I do that all the time, without notice or schedule, and sometimes in unexpected ways. We have a problem and we are the solution. I can forge a community that feeds the hungry, gives drink to the thirsty, shelters the homeless, welcomes the stranger, and preserves life in all its forms.
Wednesday February 14, 2024 - Unsung Heroes
The Gospels emphasize the interactions of the disciples who had direct knowledge of Jesus. We know them well. There are others vital to the success of Jesus’ mission that we barely know. After Saul’s encounter on the road to Damascus, he is treated by Ananias, someone Saul likely would have arrested. Peter’s mother-in-law is healed by Jesus. Unnamed disciples saw to the needs of Jesus and the apostles as they traveled. In Paul’s epistles., there are examples where Paul instructs individuals vital to his mission who are barely mentioned.
We are blessed with many unsung heroes at SS Peter and Paul. I am thinking of the partners of the staff and volunteers. You go unrecognized and unnamed. Your partners are integrally involved with the planning, scheduling, and execution of many Church functions. These functions span a width swath of parish life: food preparation, religious education, adult faith and social programs, teen and children’s programs, audio-visual, music, liturgy and cleaning. Some are relative newcomers to the parish; others have supported the parish for many years. I am grateful for the unsung heroes of SS Peter and Paul parish. May God’s blessings be upon you.
Thursday February 15, 2024 - Electricity
Why include this in a reflection? I am grateful for the gifts given me and the believers and non-believers who have helped me. I believe gratitude is a call to action. Climate change most affects those who, as Catholics, we are called to serve: the poor, the hungry, thirsty, homeless, and the stranger. I can give my time and treasure and share my talents as a volunteer to this end. I can also use some of that treasure to prove to others that we all can do more. Add some insulation to your attic. Buy a more energy efficient appliance when needed. Think about heat pump technology instead of traditional water heaters. Put solar panels on a south or west facing roof. Many little changes make a big difference. Have any questions? Ask me. (I’m also happy to explain ‘This Old House’.)
My perceptions arise from biases and also how I want to be viewed. Perceptions are triggered by the person’s appearance, what their occupation is or whether they have one, how they sound when they speak, how they carry themselves. These are all on the surface. Jesus took time and with the insight of both God and man saw the potential greatness of those he encountered. I will never possess the insight of God. I can work to sharpen the insight given me as a Catholic Christian and exercise the values of forgiveness, mercy, love, compassion, and sacrifice. In doing so, perceptions can be discarded more easily and those I encounter I will see more fully as Children of God.
Jesus’ relatives thought he was out of his mind for attracting so much attention to his teachings. As a young man I would have felt terrible if this were said of me. Now I hope that when I am remembered, it will be that I was crazy when I learned so much in school; crazy when I chose night call to be more available to my family; crazy when I volunteered both near and far; crazy when I made the Sunday drive to SS. Peter and Paul and crazy as I part with time, treasure, and energy because the Son of God came with a message of love and service.
To the world outside of my faith community, these decisions appear that I am out of my mind. This is an honor that has to be earned. I have not been perfect in earning this accolade. I believe I have more to do to earn the coveted title: Crazy in the name of Jesus. Pray for me as I continue to be out of my mind.
Remaining tender I thought, what a powerful concept and how simple an observation on Jesus’ life. Tenderness for me is a composite of love, compassion, and mercy. Tenderness is the action that concludes the decision to love, feel compassion, and know mercy. I read daily of the loss of tenderness in my and the broader community. The unhoused remain so. Food kitchens and services are busier than ever. Innocents are allowed to die for adherence to protocol, maintenance of power, or for revenge. This is not Jesus’ way. From healing the sick and raising Lazarus to consoling the women of Jerusalem on the path to his death, Jesus was tender. At Mass, I promise to remember the sacrifice of Christ and to know, love, and serve God. When I make the sign of the Cross, I promise to live: “In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit.” If I live always with the thought of tenderness in mind, heart, and hands, I can change at least one person’s world.
Reflections for Feb. 5-11, 2024
February 5, 2024 - Not the Discipleship I Expected…
February 6, 2024 - Not Where I Expected Jesus…I Wasn’t Looking There
February 8, 2024 - Jesus, I Confess…
Jesus, I’m so angry! I witnessed an injustice that I had no power to change. No… actually, I participated in the injustice. Not by choice or will, but by association, because I am part of the system that caused it. A system that didn’t have the will or the skill or the creativity to do better. I wanted to fight back and change the outcome, but I was powerless. The deck was stacked against the victim and against a thoughtful intervention. The deck has a long history. And, the victim was a child, a vulnerable child in a system without the ability to see through his eyes, a system that failed to see it could do so much better. I’m angry, and I’m grieving… grieving the innocence lost, the status quo that doesn’t understand its inequities and its frequent sins of omission. Jesus, I know you know this pain. I know you experienced it. I saw you in this child.
February 9, 2024 – Sent Out as Disciple—What Do You Mean, Carry Nothing??
February 10, 2024 - God Never Breaks the Thread
Recently I’ve been listening to one of my favorite mentors, James Finley. He’s talking about the contemplative life and the intentionality of being true to God’s presence in our lives. I relate to the experience of having good intentions about prayer, a desire to stay aware of God’s presence with me, but then to failing to follow through with my good intentions. As Jim Finley says, “I break the thread” of the conscious connection between me and God. I break it when I don’t meet my own expectations, but I also break it when I think I have to prove myself to God, or when I let life circumstances define me. I break it when I let my view of God get too small or when I judge others or think I can regulate God’s grace.
But the thing is, God never breaks the thread. The thread stays intact because it is our umbilical cord. The cord provides all I need to sustain me, whether I recognize it is there or not. God never lets go of the thread, even when we think we have.
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio
Reflections for Jan. 29-Feb. 4, 2024
January 29, 2024—Naughty Dog
Late last year we rescued a young black lab who we named Millie. She is about a year old and every bit a lab puppy. She has destroyed no less than a dozen dish towels, 3 wooden spatulas and many pairs of shoes. She ate two loaves of fancy focaccia bread and an entire gluten free pot pie that I had made specially for my daughter. She jumps on the beds and the couch when no one is looking and refuses to go anywhere near a hose. Before you ask about a crate, let me tell you that she broke out several times and it wasn’t safe to leave her inside one. This dog is naughty, and we are completely and totally in love with her.
When I think about how I can love this silly dog while she destroys my house, I can’t help but think of God who looks down upon me, watching me as I make yet another mistake or destroy something he gave to me. I feel immense gratitude that even when God is confused by the choices I make or upset at what relationships and gifts I destroy, that he holds me in love and invites me to be a beloved part of his family.
Erin Gallawa
January 30, 2024—Alarms
It’s amazing to me how my husband and I can each sleep through the other person’s alarm, yet each of us wakes up immediately for our own alarm. It’s not like we can’t hear them— they are only as far as the other side of the bed. But our bodies and our minds are tuned somehow to that message, just for us.
How then, is this like messages from God? We all experience the world together, but our experiences set off different alarms for us individually, that only hold purpose for us. Those unique messages are sent to us by God to help us “wake up” to what he wants us to hear. Sometimes I can let the messages that others receive be a distraction. I get interested in what God is calling other people to do. I need to seek out only what messages God is sending me! Lord, let me hear your call and not be distracted by others!
Erin Gallawa
January 31, 2024—Snooze
As I was thinking about alarms for yesterday’s reflection, I started thinking about the snooze button. I used to be a regular “snoozer” on my alarm. I always built in enough time to hit the snooze button once or twice, but eventually I became wary of this method. Now I set two alarms, just in case I sleep through the first one. Even though I can’t remember the last time that occurred, it has just become part of my process. I wonder how I am hitting “snooze” on the messages God is sending me? Do I hop right up when he is calling me to something? Or do I push it down the road to a time that is more convenient for me?
I don’t think I have a simple answer for myself. I know that God is always sending me messages—some are small and less significant. Others are big and more difficult to say yes to. I think the big ones are the ones that I am kicking down the road, hoping that I can face that choice later. But God is calling me NOW! It is time to wake up and say yes!
Erin Gallawa
February 1, 2024— February
I have always loved February. Of course there is Valentine’s Day and my birthday, but it also feels like a quirky little month with is weirdly short number of days and an occasional leap year! It comes after the quiet, dark month of January and it feels so bright and hopeful after 31 long days in the new year! As a kid, February was always a little special for the extra three-day weekends, although since I don’t get those holidays off anymore, it doesn’t hold the same appeal.
Today I welcome February with hope and joy for the month ahead. This month holds Ash Wednesday and the beginning of our Lenten journey. February celebrates the saint days for St. Brigid (today!), St. Valentine, St. Blaise and more. It is a month overtaken by a Hallmark holiday, but a holiday rooted in Christian tradition. May this short month of February be full of love for each of us and lead us to a meaningful Lenten practice!
Erin Gallawa
February 2, 2024—Minivan
Early in our MOMents of Grace faith sharing group, we read a book called “My Monastery Is a Minivan.” The title of that book has stuck with me for years, as I remember the sacredness of finding God in the mundane world of motherhood and specifically the uninterrupted time I am blessed with while driving my kids around.
Last month I said goodbye to the minivan after driving one for nearly a decade. I already miss many of the minivan amenities (most notably the space!), but also what it represents now that I no longer have a minivan. It feels like a real marker of time—that my growing girls are not children anymore and that we have moved into a new era of parenting.
While I look forward to this new stage of life, I give thanks for the minivan years and all the blessings of motherhood that were contained in that vehicle. Indeed, my minivan was a sacred place of mothering.
Erin Gallawa
February 3, 2024—Home
I met a woman years ago who always offered the same petition: “I pray for all those who have left the Church.” I was only in my early 20s at that point and had not yet seen my family and friends leave the faith they grew up in. Today I know so many adults raised in the Catholic Church who no longer practice their faith. I don’t know their reasons for leaving. I just know that many of them used to sit in the pews next to me and now don’t step foot in the building. It leaves me to wonder what, if anything, I can do to keep my children in the faith? They have followed after me in other things—musical theater, swim and now water polo. But I know that this is not something I can choose for them. I know there will be a time when I cannot just put them in the car and take them to Mass with me. So two decades later, I join with that woman in praying for those who’ve left the Catholic Church and I add two new prayers: thank you, God for those who return home, and please show us the way to keep our children with you.
Erin Gallawa
February 4, 2024—Driver Seat
The closer my kids get to 16, the more I think about driving. A few weeks ago, I was thinking about how natural it is to accelerate and brake without having to think about it. Those movements in driving have become rote. There is danger in things becoming habit, though. That is when there is potential to lose engagement. In driving it could mean making a mistake that causes an accident. In my faith life, it could mean losing connection to God, prayer, community and the Eucharist. I feel challenged to ensure that my participation in the Mass and personal prayer doesn’t become just a repetitive activity. In driving and in my faith life, I always want to be actively engaged and participating!
Erin Gallawa
Reflections for Jan. 22-28, 2024
January 22, 2024 – Prayer
Can our prayers affect the outcome of something? Or are we just to pray for God’s will? I cannot see where just praying for God’s will is in scripture. Jesus tells us about the old woman that keeps pestering the judge repeatedly until he finally gives in to her request so she will go away (Luke 18: 1-8). It says in James 4:2 “you do not have, because you do not ask”. And in Mathew 7:7,” ask and you shall receive”. God is constantly telling us to pray for our needs and our wants. Even in the Lord’s Prayer we ask for our daily bread. The only time Jesus tells us how not to pray is if we do it to call attention to ourselves like the Pharisees (Matthew 6: 5-6). We are called to pray and pray often. I do believe that prayers can affect the outcome when God choses to use our prayers to accomplish His purposes. But I must always be open to His will.
Kurt Peterson
January 23, 2024 – Trust vs Clarity
There is a story of a man who came to see Mother Teresa. He asked her to pray for him and she said she would. He said he wanted her to pray for clarity. Mother Teresa told the man that she would not pray for clarity but for trust. When I first heard that, I had to let it sit in my mind for a little bit. Why would Mother Teresa not pray for clarity? I am sure that is a very common prayer for people, I have even prayed for that myself. Maybe it is because clarity is a great thing to have but is rarely fully achieved. Even in the times when I felt I had clarity on something there was still an element of doubt. I had to trust that I made the correct decision. Clarity can be an illusion because we never know how everything will be in the future. We can only trust it will work out. As scripture says in Philippians 4:13, “I can do all things in Christ who strengthens me “.
Kurt Peterson
January 24, 2024 – How Can I Help You?
Once a year, usually in December, our men’s Wake Up ministry invites the women in our lives to join us in our meeting. This year this occurred in January. We all listened together on the topic of resolutions. We broke up into small groups to discuss the questions given to us. We then returned to the larger group to talk about what we shared in our small groups. One of the questions was “’What would a year of striving ‘to know, to love and to serve God’ in small and simple ways look like for you’”. One woman commented that for us to fully serve others in Christ, all those elements needed to be there and in that order. I thought about what she said and how insightful it was. We first need to know Him through scripture, through other believers, and our church. As we begin to know Him, we begin to love Him more and more. As we love Him more and more, we respond to his love by serving others in our families and outside our families. As a Christian I do not serve others for myself but because it is my response to Christ’s love for me. To know, to love, to serve is what Jesus did for us. How can I do anything less for Him?
Kurt Peterson
January 25, 2024 - At Hand
We hear throughout the Gospels, first from John the Baptist and then Jesus, that the Kingdom is at hand, but what does this mean? In a biblical context, the phrase "at hand" signifies proximity in terms of place, time, or personal relationships. It implies nearness, suggesting that a particular event or divine presence is imminent. But what does it mean to me here in 2024? Jesus hasn’t physically returned yet so where is the time “at hand “in my life? Like so many things about Christ, there is always a deeper meaning. Though Jesus left the disciples and returned to heaven, He was still present to them and is to us now. He is always with me, but the nearness of His presence depends on my openness to feel Him. When I focus on Jesus, I can feel his presence. However when He feels distant in my life it is because I am distant. When I return my focus to Him, I feel his presence again. I am called to be Christ in the world and when I focus on Him, His kingdom is at hand.
Kurt Peterson
January 26, 2024 – 2023: the Year of Firsts
We are now in 2024 and soon will be approaching the anniversary of my mother-in-law, Celia’s, passing. 2023 was the year of firsts. Holidays, birthdays, weddings, and anniversaries, they all brought back memories of her celebrating with family and friends. She was always a special part of the celebrations. In our family, weddings always have Mariachis playing and the women always sing the song “Volver, Volver” with the Mariachis. Last December was the first time they sang it without her. Though there is some sadness that she is not here, there is also so much joy in remembering her in those times. She is always present in our hearts. It was one of the greatest joys in my life that she was able to live with us for over 20 years. The year of firsts may be over but her love will be with me forever.
Kurt Peterson
January 27, 2024 – Solitude vs Loneliness
Solitude and loneliness are two sides of the same coin. While both involve being alone, they differ in their spiritual aspects. Solitude is a chosen state of being alone. I often use it as a time for self-reflection and personal growth. It is a constructive time for me to engage with myself to recharge and find inner peace. On the other hand, loneliness is an undesirable feeling of being disconnected from others, even in the presence of others. When I am lonely, I withdraw inside myself and become distant to others. It is not a time for reflection and growth, but a time of doubt and insecurity. But in both aspects, I look to God to help me. In solitude, I look to Him to recharge and encourage me. In loneliness, I look to Him to renew me and strengthen me. Jesus also experienced solitude and loneliness. We often read how he would go away in solitude to be with His Father in prayer. But He also felt loneliness at times, like when He wept for Jerusalem, when He prayed in the garden of Gethsemane and when He cried out on the cross. God was always there with Jesus, just like He is always here with us.
Kurt Peterson
January 28, 2024 – Another Way
A couple of weeks ago at RCIA, we were discussing the story of the three wisemen who came to pay homage to the child born in Bethlehem. One of the sponsors said he always found the words “and they went another way” to have a deeper meaning. There is the superficial meaning that they did not return by the original route back through Herod, but the deeper meaning is that Jesus changed them. After they met Him, they were changed. They could not go back to their old ways but to go a new way, “another way”. Just like the three wisemen, once you and I have met Him, we cannot go back to our old path. God has given us a new way in Him, and our journey is now different. We now go another way.
Kurt Peterson
Reflections for Jan. 15-21, 2024
January 15, 2024 - Satisfied with Minimal
As a child, I remember an older woman coming to our grandparent’s house begging every Sunday. She never accepted more than 50 paise (equivalent to 6.6 cents in those days). Even if we offered more, she would not accept it. I used to wonder why she was refusing to receive more. “She is not greedy, and she knows how to live on the minimum resources,” - My grandfather commented. Knowing the value and satisfaction of living with limited resources was quite a lesson. It also reflects a humble dependence on God – praying and joyfully living with the ‘daily bread’ the Lord offers (Mt. 6:11)
Growing up in a big family of 8, we learned to share and value the resources available. Still, we had a good life. It made us appreciate the provisions we had and inculcated in us the value of sharing and not falling into the sin of jealousy. I learned to be satisfied with the minimal. Not only did I learn about leading a simple life, I learned about being compassionate to the needy.
Bony
January 16, 2024 - ‘En-deered’
Last year in May, on a road trip from New Mexico to Moab, Utah, my car was
‘en-deered’; that is it hit a deer. It was very sudden, and I am sorry for the deer; it died. I could not have saved it in any way. By God’s grace we were okay, but the car was severely damaged, unable to be driven long distances. The closest thing we could see was a weigh station. I had never encountered a situation like this before. I was shaking and didn’t know what to do next; there was no reception for my cell phone either—stuck in the middle of nowhere! We just prayed for God’s help; after a few minutes, angels of help arrived, beginning with the officer from the weigh station approaching us, enquiring, and guiding us to the town 3 miles away and to the (Monticello) wrecking company. From there and with a few phone calls with our parishioner, Steve Snyder, the Gold Rush Subaru dealer in Auburn, and AAA, we were able to get back on the road with a rental car in 1.30 hours. God’s help comes to us in gracious people when needed, for ‘He is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble’ (Psalm 46:1). Loving God, keep safe all your travelers and protect all your creation. Amen.
Bony
January 17, 2024 - Vatican
Needless to say, my visit to the Vatican in 2022 was an awesome one. Having a two-month sabbatical course was an enriching experience. I was able to visit historical places and admire the rich culture in and around Rome. The most captivating experience was seeing the people gathered for the papal audience, waiting and waving hands as the Pope passed in the papal mobile and participating in the prayer service. As I was mesmerized by it, a question came to mind, ‘Who am I on the ground of St. Peter’s Square - a tourist or a pilgrim part of the body of Christ?’ The answer also came quickly: I am one of the members of the Body of Christ, gathered with other members of the Body of Christ around the world, united with the Pope – the Rock of the Church. This thought energized me as a priest who is called always to serve the Lord. Oh God, keep your church in unity. Amen.
Bony
January 18, 2024 - Pet Squirrel
Growing up, we had few domesticated creatures - a cow, lambs, chickens, ducks, turkeys, fish, and a dog. We never had an indoor pet. That changed after I went to boarding school. On my first vacation, I came home with a squirrel, a wild squirrel I had caught. Though it bit my fingers severely as I caught it, it was eventually tamed and became our family pet. It ran around all over the house. It was delightful to see how friendly he was to everyone. Every morning my dad would open his cage. As dad raked the leaves off and cleaned the front yard, the squirrel followed him around. He was also our wakeup alarm - he would go around the rooms nibbling the toes of those who were still asleep and too lazy to wake up. Pets can give new energy and for many they are also a source of comfort. Give thanks to God, for he has created a beautiful universe with flora and fauna. We have the responsibility to protect them.
Bony
January 19, 2024 – Living Memorials
Recently, a distant relative of mine asked for information about building a monumental tomb for his mother, who died a few months ago and was buried in our home parish cemetery. Every parish has a cemetery in our diocese and the area, allowing all parishioners to have a burial place at no cost. The affluent used to build a monumental tomb paying a high price. That has changed; the diocese has a strict policy that even if a monument is allowed, it may remain only for a restricted period. Our discussion about building a monumental tomb led to a different memorial, - a living memorial - building a home for a needy family in his mother’s name.
This decision reminded me of Jesus’ words: “Do this in memory of me.” Jesus did not build any temple building. He was the temple, and we are called his living temples. He built the church - the body of Christ - the people of God. He did not ask the disciples for a monument but rather for actions of love - in memory of him. He even criticized the contemporary leaders for building monuments for the prophets whom their ancestors killed (Ref). Let us build more living memorials that give life to others.
Bony
January 20, 2024 - Franciscan Family Apostolate
During my vacation last year in October, I attended the golden jubilee celebration of the Franciscan Family Apostolate (FFA). FFA is an NGO founded 50 years ago in Connecticut, USA, inspired by the life of St. Francis of Assisi to help poor families in the area of the Alleppey diocese in India. Over the years, it has helped and still helps hundreds of families through its incredible family sponsorship program. A gracious sponsor family chooses a needy family and assists them for a period of time. The positive impact of this program is that it is not just assistance; a bond is created between the two families. The staff of the Alleppey office walk with the family through their economic projects. I have been associated with FFA and a part of this tremendous ministry. It reminds me of the spirit of early Christians who were one in heart and mind, shared everything they had (Acts 4:32). We are called to be channels of God’s grace to others with our sacrificial gifts.
Bony
January 21, 2024 - Gentle
When I was in the minor seminary (the first three years of 11 years of seminary formation), Monsignor Varghese was our Rector. He was very gentle and treated all of us with care. He showed compassion in dealing with all teenagers. He had a lot of patience. We had never seen him get
angry except fo once; that was when there was a fight between two students, and he heard they were exchanging very rude and impolite words. He chastised them with a firm warning, saying unless you learn to treat one another with respect and gentleness, how can you be a future priest of Christ? So, learn to behave now. That was the first lesson from a gentle and caring priest in treating everyone with gentle care. As Christians, we are called to treat one another respectfully, accepting all differences. There is no Christ in us if we cater to hatred in our hearts. This world needs more gentleness and respect for one another; let me be the one to be gentle to all. Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves (Rom 12:10).
Bony
Reflections for Jan. 8-14, 2024
January 8, 2024 - Gifts
A fellow parishioner recently gave me a gift that he had made of wood, a special wood salvaged from a giant oak tree that used to stand between the multipurpose room and the religious education building office. He shaped a bit of the wood into two pieces to form a ballpoint pen and it is a delight to my eyes, and as well as my hand where it nestles firmly. That brought to mind two other men in the parish, both skilled woodworkers who have also gifted me with works of their hands, artful and useful items. To say that they have used their God given talents is an understatement. I tell you this to illustrate not only these three men sharing their gifts but to recognize that you and I likewise have been gifted by God (certainly not with woodworking skills for me) and asked to. Share those gifts as generously as the three who have shared theirs with me. I must recognize that however different my skills may be, God expects the generous spending of those gifts for the benefit of others. I am so very fortunate to have many people in my life who have done so with me, and I am moved by their many examples of gifting others.
Deacon David
January 9, 2024 - Waiting
As I’ve aged, I’m happy to report that my ability to endure lines has improved. Improved is the proper word as it implies progress. I’m still prone to huff and puff when people don’t realize how important it is that I get done with whatever it is I’m waiting for. Recently I was in line at a CVS drug store while a woman chatted on and on with the (only) clerk in the store while rummaging in her voluminous handbag for a credit card. I didn’t have to get anywhere else quickly so I congratulated myself on being cool, calm and collected. That brought to mind, later on, outside the store, that God must have spent a lot of time waiting on me to grow up enough to learn that I’m just not that important to take pride in what I view as “progress”. It is so good to realize that God, most likely not waiting in a line, can give me the time to mature and not cast me aside while I’m rummaging through life and possibly causing others to wonder if I’d ever get out of their way.
Deacon David
January 10, 2024 - Witness
Some of the television programs I regularly watch are crime/detective/courtroom dramas and many times the episode revolves around “witnesses”. Simply put a witness has seen or heard something that is important to solving a case. One night as I couldn’t get to sleep, maybe because of having watched tv too close to bedtime, I wondered about what kind of a witness I’d make: could I tell what color eyes the defendant had or how tall or old or what clothes they wore? Perhaps thinking about that is what kept me awake longer but it did give me a chance to think about that question that was often asked in my younger years: “would you be convicted of being a Christian given the evidence of your life?” There have been times over the years when I’ve pondered that question quite seriously and while I’m fairly sure I could pass a test with a C+ I have much to do to bring it up to a B. Mine is not a “case to solve” in a court of law but rather a renewal of my understanding of my profession of faith and living up to that which, along with you, I practice.
May this new year be a time of new beginnings and giving witness to that which I believe.
Deacon David
January 11, 2024 - Reconciliation
Early in December Jane and I took advantage of the opportunity to attend the communal reconciliation service and arrived almost exactly at the advertised starting time only to find that we were amongst the last arrivals. We were greeted warmly, and the seating was explained as we were given a choice about which priest we would be talking with. Since all of the pews seemed equally occupied, we chose the group nearest the doors we had entered. As the evening progressed, we had ample time for meditation and guidance from the aids to examination of conscience displayed on the screens. When my turn came, I was guided to the entryway where I awaited the previous penitent to exit. I remarked to my guide that I was waiting in a dark alcove but could see the bright light of the path toward where the priest was seated and waiting. She appreciated the connection of the physical path we penitents make this night to the actuality of the sacrament, that is, moving from a place of darkness/sin to a place of light via absolution and penance. It was a moment of connection not just between my guide and myself but also to what I was doing in the here and now to reconcile with God.
Deacon David
January 12, 2024 - Faith
Our youngest grandchild is 12 and has chosen to follow the faith of her father who is Jewish. She is, however, open to our religious practices, makes the sign of the cross as we pray before meals, and is happy to take advantage of not only the eight days of Hanukkah but also of Christmas gifts. We were at her home on Christmas morning when she was going through the items in her stocking and exclaiming with each one how that was just what she wanted. The last item in the stocking was, per our family tradition, an orange and that too made her smile. Her other grandparents were somewhat worried that Jane and I might be unhappy with our granddaughter’s decision to follow their faith but we assured them that we are happy that she is making religion an integral part of her life. Jesus was born a Jew and practiced that religion until his death. Our faith has grown out of what Jesus preached and practiced: loving everyone and leading everyone to God the Father. And this Christmas I am reminded again that I was accepted for baptism as a Catholic on Christmas eve 1960, receiving one of the most important gifts I have ever received, faith.
Deacon David
January 13, 2024 - Cold
I’m seated at a desk typing this reflection in the warmth of my home, but my fingers are cold and I’m making quite a few mistakes which means I have to constantly backspace and retype. I’m feeling sorry for myself because my cold fingers are partly due to one of my medications, a blood thinner. My goodness, what a problem to have, taking life prolonging meds and complaining about side effects. I have the ability to turn up the heater or warm my hands or….I could, as my mother in law used to advise: “offer it up”. If you are unfamiliar with that term she meant to say: think about what Jesus had to suffer in his life and offer your small inconvenience to join in His sufferings. That leads me to thinking about the many unhoused/homeless who are camping on the streets of Sacramento who do not have the ability to turn up the heater, warm their hands or perhaps have the life prolonging medications I take for granted. Theirs is a life of need and some suffering and I don’t have the answer to the problem. However, I do know that I cannot be cold to their needs because that would not be how Jesus would be. So, I will offer up my small discomfort if for no other reason than to maintain awareness of my responsibility as a follower of Jesus to respond to the needs of others be it hunger, warmth, sustenance or simply acknowledgment. Please pray with me for our homeless siblings, children of our Father.
Deacon David
January 14, 2024 - Traditional Activities
Our oldest daughter recently went through a life changing event and planned a celebration which she invited the whole family to share with her. The proposed celebration revolved around a family tradition Jane and I started many years ago: going to some body of water, the sea, a lake, river or a swimming pool on New Year’s day and doing what is commonly called nowadays, the “polar plunge”. She lives in Ventura, CA near the Pacific Ocean, and proposed such a dip to anyone interested, to wash away the old and embrace the new to which we agreed, albeit somewhat uncertainly. As the day approached to travel to Ventura a three-day storm with massive waves hit the shoreline and beaches were closed so the proposed dip was cancelled. While there was a certain disappointment, I must admit that that particular tradition is not as appealing as it once was. We still intend to celebrate with our daughter and perhaps it will be with some new way, a new tradition, involving new beginnings. As this new year is beginning I wish for you the continuation of those traditions which draw you closer to family and/or community or the beginning of new activities resulting in the same closeness. May God bless us on our way.
Deacon David
Reflections for Jan. 1-8, 2024
January 1, 2024- A Yearly Examen
Happy New Year! This is the time of year when the world seems to be willing to start fresh. Whether it’s determining to create healthier habits, desiring a deeper commitment to faith, or a plan to look for meaningful work, most of us take at least a few minutes to consider what might need to change in our lives.
While I don’t typically make “resolutions”, I do find it helpful to do a daily Examen. This is an Ignatian prayer practice in which a person takes time at the end of the day to reflect on where God was at work in their life on that particular day and where they might have missed an opportunity to see God. My goal in doing this practice is to slowly become more skilled in noticing God throughout the day and in making choices that reflect my faith.
Lord, help us find you in at least some small way every day this year.
Darcy Wharton
January 2, 2024- Clean up Time
Although I would love to keep our tree up until Epiphany, we cut down a live tree each year right after Thanksgiving, so by now our tree is ready to be recycled! Once the tree is out of the house, I remove all of the household decorations, move the furniture around, and do a thorough cleaning. Sometimes I am able to figure out what things I no longer need and I donate them. The result is a clean (and hopefully less cluttered) house.
Perhaps this would be an appropriate time to “clean out” my soul, too. What ideas, beliefs, or old sins need to be released? Remember how it feels after we go to the sacrament of reconciliation? There is a freshness and newness that fills our spirit.
Lord, help us see what needs to be “cleaned up” in our spiritual lives. We are ready to begin anew.
Darcy Wharton
January 3, 2024- Paying Attention to the Nudges
A while back, I had a new person coming to me for spiritual direction. She was prompted to seek direction after reading a book entitled, “Sensible Shoes”. Quite often, people recommend books to me and there is no way that I can possibly read them all! So in this particular case I put the suggestion to read it on a back burner. A few months later, she mentioned the book again and since I’ve discovered that it sometimes takes two or three nudges from God before I pay attention, I decided perhaps this was a nudge and I should read the book after all.
I ended up being captivated by the book. The story is about four individual women who decide on their own to participate in a spiritual formation program called “The Sacred Journey”. The author does a wonderful job weaving in their experiences and their subsequent friendship. I resonated with so much in the book and I know that God surely was nudging me to read it. I even went on to read the other three books in the series and the characters encouraged me to treasure my spiritual friends and to become a more prayerful person.
Lord, help us pay attention when you are nudging us!
Darcy Wharton
January 4, 2024- Leaving a Legacy
As an adoptee, I am blessed with multiple parents. Together with my husband, we have a total of 7 parents who are all in their late eighties or early nineties. Most of them are in the process of determining how they want their belongings distributed and like many others their age, they are finding that their children and grandchildren do not want their “things”. Most people of my generation and my children’s generation already have full houses or their decorating tastes are simpler.
It seems that there is a strong desire to leave something behind for our loved ones after we are gone. I really liked Fr. Brendan McGuire’s suggestion that, instead, we build up a memory bank of experiences with our family members while we are alive. Honestly, that is the best legacy one can leave. I still have memories of my grandparents and the special times we shared.
After spending years with his disciples, Jesus breathed on them after his resurrection and said, “Receive the Holy Spirit”. This gift, along with his body that we receive each Sunday in the Eucharist is a remarkable legacy.
Lord, help us discern what is most meaningful to pass on to our loved ones and help us to appreciate the lasting gifts you give.
Darcy Wharton
January 5, 2024- Collective Effervescence
I recently heard the term “collective effervescence” and loved it. It refers to the sense of joy felt by everyone in a group as they share in an experience. This happens regularly at ball games, when everyone dresses alike and screams for their team. It also happens at musical concerts when everyone sings and sways to the music. You might even experience it at family gatherings when songs are sung together or traditions shared.
As a choir member, I have had many experiences of collective effervescence at Mass. It is even more exciting when we see that parishioners are singing and clapping along. On those days, even it it’s a day when my heart might not be ready to join a celebration, seeing the joy in others lifts my soul.
Lord, thank you for blessing us with moments of collective effervescence!
Darcy Wharton
January 6, 2024- Meet and Mingle
It’s an interesting phenomenon, but most of the ministries within our parish started with an idea brought forth by one or two parishioners who saw or felt a need within our community and then took action. One of our newest ministries, Meet & Mingle, is a perfect example. One individual mentioned to me that there is a sense of loneliness that can occur when people live alone or do not have a large network of family and friends. It also can also be difficult to get to know people when you first join a parish. She wondered if people might make new friends by sharing a potluck meal together in the middle of the day.
Together, with the help of a few other people, the ministry was created. We realized that even if someone isn’t feeling “lonely”, most people enjoy a potluck! The group now meets on the second Monday of every month from 11:00 AM- 12:30 PM in the Social Hall and all those who attend are invited to bring a dish to serve 6. Some people join us every time and others come periodically.
It is a delight to see the Spirit of God at work. As I attended the last gathering, joy-filled conversation filled the air -all because someone sensed a need and took action.
Lord, help us always listen and respond to your invitation to bring your people together.
Darcy Wharton
January 7, 2024- Never to Be the Same
In the gospel story of the wisemen visiting Jesus, there is an interesting line that states, “and having been warned in a dream not to return to Herod, they departed for their country by another way”. Taken literally, one could deduce that it makes sense that the Magi would take measures to avoid Herod and find a safer route. However, someone once suggested that there are at least two deeper lessons in there for all of us. The first lesson is that when we have had a deeply spiritual experience in which God becomes even more real to us, we are forever changed and it is impossible to go back to the way things were. A second lesson is that it is important to pay attention to what God may be communicating to us in unexpected ways- dreams, conversations with friends, prayer, etc.
Both of these lessons resonate with me. I have had experiences in prayer or on a retreat in which I have felt an inner “shift” in my relationship with God and I know that God is changing my heart. When that has happened, I know that I am forever changed. I have also been blessed with a wonderful spiritual director and faithful friends who help me discern the movement of the Spirit in my life. I am so grateful for the ways that God meets me and challenges me to continue to grow in faith.
Lord, help us continue to bring the gift of our lives to you, knowing that when we do that, you will meet us face to face and we will never be the same.
Darcy Wharton
Reflections for Dec. 18-24, 2023
December 18, 2023 - Gifts: Knowledge and Understanding
As a youth, I had two solid beliefs: everyone experienced the world the way I did and the rules of the Church lead to salvation. Then, as lay missionaries, David and I took our family to Kenya (after a year of training and preparation) and my eyes were opened! I was immediately challenged by polygamy. There were people who had come to believe the same things about Jesus that I believed, who yearned for the Eucharist, yet could not be baptized because they were part of a polygamous household. They understood commitment to each other, the men provided for the women and children, women had a certain kind of standing in the community and children were cared for, often by multiple “mothers”. I’m not claiming that this was ideal. But, how could the Church require any of them to disrupt a situation of commitment that would harm the standing of most of them? It was a tangled web of sad circumstances, leaving some yearning for and denied Baptism, Eucharist and membership in a new kind of community. Then I remembered what I had learned as a child about baptism of desire, and stopped worrying about their salvation. But it did reveal to me that God is here, everywhere, in the most difficult of situations, in ways that we cannot understand or judge. And thanks to Vatican II I am gifted with the knowledge that just rule-following isn’t what God asks of us…It is to know Him, love Him and serve Him. Thank you.
Jane Haproff
December 19, 2023 - Gifts: Belief
Recently I encountered a description of the difference between belief and faith in a book by Fr. Vincent Donovan about taking the gospel to the Masai, a seminomadic, pastoral and fierce warrior tribe in East Africa 30 years ago. This book speaks to me in many ways because, I’m sure, of our having lived in Kenya at roughly the same time. He relates how a Masai elder questioned whether the word faith, meaning to agree to, was the right term to use for what happens in baptism. He described it this way: Faith is like a hunter shooting a lion from a great distance. Only his eyes and his trigger finger are involved. But to really believe is like a lion stalking prey where every part of him is involved: eyes, ears, sense of smell, legs as he runs, and “all the power of his body as he lunges on the prey who he wraps in his arms (front paws) and pulls to himself and makes part of himself.” This is belief: the total giving of oneself to something such that no part is left uninvolved. So Baptism is not a first step in sacraments; it's the changing of one’s entire life into something sacramental...then the elder realizes that what he has really described is God…who stalks us until we are his. I am grateful that God is the Lion.
Jane Haproff
December 20, 2023 – Gifts: Faith
When I speak of my “faith” I am not referring only to a body of claims that I assent to. I am referring to living a certain kind of life that is the result of believing, the total giving of oneself in trusting that those claims are true. That life involves a set of practices that keep those beliefs forefront in my mind and experience; things such as rituals, prayers, devotions and discussions shared with a community who believes as I do. So fidelity to my faith community reenforces my faith. And when I struggle, my community carries me through difficult and or challenging times.
All of this is contained in the word “faith” for me: belief, tradition, fidelity, prayer, support, and purpose. Perhaps purpose is the most important. I am so thankful to have been gifted with this kind of faith as it sustains and strengthens me and allows to recognize that I am a child of God called to a purpose that is unique to my life. Thank you for being that kind of community
Jane Haproff
December 21, 2023 – Gifts: Tradition
Today two daughters and three granddaughters met to bake cookies. This is a family tradition dating back fifty-eight years when as a young mother I wanted to create an old fashioned Christmas. We made gingerbread men and strung popcorn to hang on the tree, and made homemade eggnog and English toffee. The next Christmas my then five-year-old son asked if we were going to make those men again and so the tradition was born. And as the family grew, the crowd of cookie makers grew as well. This year there are fewer of us, but a granddaughter visiting her uncle in NY baked cookies and they made the requisite toffee together. And in Ventura a daughter and two granddaughters will bake together. As we do this of course we share stories, laugh about that Christmas we made tons of cookies with rotten flour, and remember what it was like during Covid when we could not be together. There is something sacred about this time that reminds me of our own beginnings as Church. There is no bread and wine shared, okay there’s usually wine, but if feels holy, more than family, more than community. It’s an honoring of a deeper truth, the importance of being one. This is the gift that tradition gives me, it unites me with those who have gone before me and those who are far away…all doing the same thing in what might be a slightly different way, and remembering…!
Jane Haproff
December 22, 2023 - Gifts: Eucharist
In most pagan cultures there is no separation between religion and life. And so it was among the Masai that offering a tuft of grass (a much-required commodity to feed cattle) to someone was a way of offering peace. It wasn’t a symbol of peace…it actually created peace. So in some small villages of East Africa, Mass began with the priest selecting a tuft of grass and offering it to the first person he met upon his arrival. The tuft of grass passed from person to person, as a call to join the community for Mass and as a sign of peace. Because it was not just a symbol, if there was any kind of enmity among people, the grass would stop. There could be prayer asking the Spirit to change the community …taking everything, not just the bread and wine, but the entire life of the village and changing it into the Body of Christ. Or the elders of the village would pronounce that they could not have Eucharist that day because the community, the Body of Christ was not whole. Imagine taking the idea of the community as Body of Christ that seriously such that our participation in the Eucharist stood as a judgment on our lives and not just something that we expect to receive. I am humbled by this kind of faith. And I am grateful to those new Catholics so far away in space and time for helping me to see what a gift Eucharist is to the community and to a real, lived life.
Jane Haproff
December 23, 2023 – Gifts: Jesus
One of the difficulties Fr. Donovan describes in Christianity Rediscovered was that the Masai are a monotheistic tribe who see all of creation as complete and static, with a god who lives in isolation from them on the highest mountain. They have no future tense; life is set in an already existing pattern. So how to explain a God who was in their midst, who cared about creation and who suffered with them? Donovan explained that such a God had to be visible; he had to take on human flesh so he made humans in his image: Man…the image of God made visible in the world....an unimaginable idea because no human can be a god. But what if there was one man who is the perfect man that God had in mind; such a perfect man that we could only say: this Man is God. Jesus was that Man. Then Fr. Donovan told them gospel stories (adapted to their culture which has no experience of the sea, fish or farming). Finally Fr. Donovan asks them the question we all have to answer: what do you think of this Jesus who shows us that God is close to us, who invites us to be part of completing creation, is affected by our suffering, loves the poor, the merciful, those who suffer unjustly, models forgiveness, and promises to prepare green pastures for us? Looked at from this perspective, Jesus tells me not only what God is, but what man is and I am grateful to walk with Him in the future tense.
Jane Haproff
December 24, 2023 – Gifts
In November our whole family got together for a combined birthday party for two of us, that lasted two days. Even our Coast Guard grandson surprised us with a visit! We had a marvelous, exhausting time. Everyone seemed to understand that this meant some of us would not gather again for Christmas. Those of us who could get together locally discussed not exchanging gifts, but rather drawing names and buying for only one person. Our youngest granddaughter, 11 years old, was delighted with this idea at first. But as the discussion deepened and she realized this meant only one gift given to each person she expressed disappointment: ”We all just do one gift? Oh but I like________.” I expected her to add she likes getting more than one present. Instead she added “ …I like giving gifts to everyone. I try to figure out the best one for each person, a gift that makes me think of them”. Besides this response making me happy, it made me think of how God might feel as he lavishes the gifts I’ve written about all week on us. Perhaps He simply wants us to acknowledge the pleasure He has in giving of Himself over and over again, always gifting us with what is best for us. In that case, a sincere thank you and the determination to use those gifts is all that is called for. Merry Christmas.
Jane Haproff
Reflections for Dec. 11-17, 2023
December 11, 2023—Happy New Year!
Today is the 2nd Monday of the Advent season. Advent ushers in a new (liturgical) year in the Church as we wait and prepare to celebrate the birth of Christ.
More than January 1st, I’ve always anticipated the beginning of Advent as the start of my New Year. The past week has been a time for me to reflect on how well I’m taking care of myself, praying, loving, being of service to others, and ministering as a deacon—in short, how well am I living? I have a lot to work on as this new year begins.
I once watched a Michael Landon (from “Little House on the Prairie”) movie in which a man recalls his childhood, and how he and his grandfather trained and raced homing pigeons. One message I remember from the movie is that the world would be so much better off if people would only spend as much time living as they do re-living the past.
In this New Year, a wonderful Advent/Christmas gift would be to live each day to the fullest!
Bob Leathers
December 12, 2023—Hallmark Movies, Part I
I have a confession to make. I love Hallmark Christmas movies! Now, I have to admit my wife is right, but don’t tell her I wrote this. She says all Hallmark Christmas movies are the same, so she will only watch one with me per holiday season. In every Hallmark movie, a man and a woman meet, fall in love, then have an argument and break-up, then apologize and live happily ever after.
But one of this year’s movies, A Gift of Peace, was a bit different. Without giving away the whole plot, a young married woman lost her husband two years ago. She had trusted in God that her husband would be healed from his condition, so after his death, she lost her faith, was angry with God, and couldn’t pray.
In time, with the help of her church’s grief ministry support group, she recalled that, before his death, her husband made her promise to never stop living. Once she recalled that promise, she began to live again, starting by helping others with their grief and passionately resuming her own vocation.
This was another reminder to me to live each day to the fullest!
Bob Leathers
December 13, 2023—Hallmark Movies, Part II
In the Hallmark Christmas movie, “A Gift of Peace,” a young married woman lost her husband two years ago. She had trusted in God that her husband would be healed but lost her faith when he died. She became angry that God let her husband die.
This scene reminded me of this wise saying: “’Fear not; trust in God and God will see that none of the things you fear will happen to you.’ Real religion says, ‘Fear not, the things that you are afraid of are quite likely to happen to you, but they are nothing to be afraid of.’” For Jesus, his Father’s love was the guarantee that he would always stand by Jesus in his pain. Just because Jesus was God’s beloved Son did not mean Jesus wouldn’t be hungry, or vulnerable, or cry, or never suffer death.
As we prepare to celebrate Jesus’ birth—something not easy to do given all the shopping, parties, and hustle and bustle of the annual holiday season—I’m also reminded to recall that Jesus’ name Emmanuel means, “God is With Us” and that no circumstance, no matter how ugly, warrants despair. The joy and peace of this Hallmark movie is that the young woman came to experience this. I hope I can do the same in difficult circumstances.
Bob Leathers
December 14, 2023—Eleanor Roosevelt’s Wallet
During the first week of October, my wife and I took a river cruise up the Hudson River from New York City to Albany and back. One of our stops was in Hyde Park, New York, home to U.S. President Franklin Roosevelt and his wife, Eleanor. Roosevelt was elected President four times and served during the Great Depression and World War II.
In addition to his home, the property, which is run by the National Park Service, includes Roosevelt’s presidential library, a museum, the Roosevelt’s burial sites, and beautiful grounds. What struck me most were the contents of Eleanor Roosevelt’s wallet at the time of her death in 1962 at the age of 78. There were over 40 items in her wallet including a St. Christopher card and medal, 12 poems and prayers, travel related items, and various membership/ID cards. My favorite item was the prayer card titled, “Prayer For All Those Who Work Or Fight In The War.”
According to Wikipedia, Eleanor Roosevelt was an American political figure, diplomat, and activist. She was the first lady of the United States from 1933 to 1945, making her the longest serving first lady of the United States.
I was so honored to visit her home and felt that her prayer sustained her during some of the darkest hours in our country’s history.
Bob Leathers
December 15, 2023—Is Peace Possible?
During the annual Christmas season, it is customary to sing Christmas carols about peace.
Given the recent escalation in the conflict between Israel and the Palestinians in the Gaza Strip, I wonder whether peace will ever be possible. The feature article in a recent New York Times Sunday Magazine dealt with this question: “Was Peace Ever Possible?” The article reviewed the recent history of the conflict, presenting a story of a negotiated settlement 30 years ago that seemed achievable, how it fell apart, and how peace seems so unachievable today.
It's sad that many on each side in this conflict believe they are 100% right, justified in resorting to violence, and killing their enemies and retaliating, while finding no place for mercy, forgiveness, reconciliation or peace. If only we could see in others our brothers and sisters, not enemies. Pope Francis offers us hope when he says, “Jesus is the Father’s hand who never abandons us.”
Is Peace Possible? Yes! When all else fails, I hope I can have faith and believe that Emmanuel (God is With Us) never abandons us. At the same time, what can I do to cooperate with God’s plan for peace?
Bob Leathers
December 16, 2023—Perfectly Imperfect
I grew up in Miami in my grandmother’s home. She had a beautiful, marble electric clock that graced her home until she died in 1984. After her death, the clock moved with me to California and made its way to Roseville when my wife and I moved to our home there in 2021. Then the clock broke and stopped running. We took it to a clock smith who traded out the electric clock mechanism with a battery powered one, but it never worked right. We recently said our goodbye to the clock, grateful for its years of service to our family.
Almost annually, in decorating our Christmas tree, despite being very careful, an ornament is broken, and it’s usually one we’ve had for some years or was a gift. Sometimes these ornaments can be repaired. The art of doing so is called “kintsugi,’ a Japanese term that means, “golden joinery.” It’s a philosophy that the value of an object is not in its beauty, but in its imperfections, and these imperfections are something to celebrate, not hide.
I think all of us are broken in some way, too, but also think God uses our imperfections. We don’t have to be perfect to reveal God’s love to our family, neighbors and community members in a powerful way. And when God uses our imperfect selves, isn’t this something to celebrate?
Bob Leathers
December 17, 2023—“Mary, Did You Know?”
Mary, Did You Know? is a Christmas carol written by songwriter Mark Lowry that really struck me as I heard it anew this year, sung by the acapella group, Pentatonix, during their recent concert in the Sacramento area.
These lyrics really struck me when they sang, Mary, did you know that:
“When you kiss your little baby, you kiss the face of God?”
You kiss the face of God! Wow! In the Son of God becoming human, we receive the gift of love. If only we—and that includes me—can open our hearts to receive and share this love. We can’t do this if we are in full control of our lives. We must let go. How difficult it is to believe that we are important enough to be loved by God, that God is truly in our midst when we are loved by another human being!
Bob Leathers
Reflections for Dec. 4-10, 2023
December 4, 2023 - Daddy Issues
Recently I attended the NCYC (National Catholic Youth Conference) with 5 teens from our parish. In one of the breakout sessions Bishop Joe talked about prayer. He mentioned that when we pray for other people, we are invoking the Holy Spirit to offer a prayer of intercession. He made the connection that the Spirit is the 3rd person of the Trinity and if we have "issues" with the first person, aka "Daddy", then it would make sense that it might be difficult to effectively call upon the Holy Spirit. It was an "ah-ha" moment for me as I pondered how often do I spend time with God? How often do I work on my relationship with God the Father and God the Son? In essence, we must have a relationship with God our Father and Jesus his Son if we want to know the Holy Spirit. Additionally, during the talk I was challenged with how I pray. Do I pray with a wish list mentality that God will make my prayers be answered? Or do I pray from a place of humility? Humility in prayer is letting the Father's will be done and praying for the grace to accept what His will means for me. So often I can get wrapped up in what I think I need that I forget that God is the author of life and will make all things known in His time. I still struggle with thinking that somehow I can affect the outcome of my life, but I need to recognize at the heart of it all God is in control.
Bianca Hennager
December 5, 2023 - Hide and Seek
Hide and Seek was always a fun game that I remember playing when I was a child. As the youngest I tried many times to play with my sister's older friends. I found myself always being picked to find the older kids and never being able to run as fast as they could. I would try to be stealthy when I found them to have an advantage in trying to tag them but that rarely worked. Brian Butler, a keynote speaker at NCYC spoke about this classic game and how as young children we often want to be found vs. trying to be hidden for a long period of time. Whether it is the little one giggling in the corner as you try to find them or jumping out to say, "here I am", we often want to be found. Butler further explained that this phenomenon is reminiscent of our relationship with God. We want to be found and cradled in the arms of God. The best way we can do that is through consuming Jesus, body and blood, soul and divinity in the Eucharist and being one with Him. During Eucharistic Adoration, the Bishop took Jesus out of the monstrance and cradled him in his cape as a Father cradles his child. It was truly powerful and brought such significance to how the through the Eucharist Jesus finds us when we are hidden. Bianca Hennager
December 6, 2023 - Joy Over Fear
In today's world I find myself struggling with a lot of fear and anxiety. I attribute this to the fast-paced environment I work in and to being a mom; I am always worried and fearful something will happen that I cannot control/fix/see. However, there is a certain peace in trusting in God that all things will work themselves out, maybe just not as I had planned. I am working on finding joy in these moments when things are not going as planned. Part of what I learned at NCYC is that suffering is unavoidable. A question that was posed was, "Jesus suffered so what makes you think you wouldn't have suffering too?" It was like a splash of water being thrown in my face. Ouch! Of course, Jesus suffered but how does that explain why I should have joy in suffering during the difficult storms of my life? And the answer was simple; because we are a resurrection people and despite our suffering here and now, we know this isn't the end. We know there will be better times ahead whether that is here on Earth or ultimately in Heaven. I am challenged to see joy in my trials knowing that I probably wouldn't want anyone else's crosses to bear. I am challenged to see the hand of God during the storms. I am reminded of the Footprints prayer where Christ says, "When you saw only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you." I can have joy knowing I am not alone, and Christ is with me carrying me through to the end. Bianca Hennager
December 7, 2023 - Sand vs. Rock
For my son's Eagle Scout project, he took on a sustainability project at a local high school and designed a project to install artificial turf. In the beginning stages, it didn't seem like it would require much and he thought he would be done installing the turf within 2 days. As the project drew near, he learned more of the intricate details: installing decomposed granite, rock, leveling, adding in sand, leveling and then working to install the turf. It became clear the project would span multiple weekends. He reached a point where he didn't think he would be successful and had a hard time wanting to finish. The second weekend when we began, he had a renewed spirit and focused on completing the project. It was interesting to see the rock being laid first as a strong foundation and the sand being used to fill in the gaps to strengthen the foundation. He learned a lot about the process of installing artificial turf. He understood the importance of building a strong foundation of decomposed granite and the need to smooth it out with sand to create a sturdy, level surface. The project took over 2.5 weekends and my son successfully completed his Eagle Project.
When I think of today's Gospel about being built on a solid foundation of rock, I am reminded of my son's Eagle project and how rock is necessary to create stability. Sand smooths out the gaps, but it would not be a stable foundation without the rock. Bianca Hennager
December 8, 2023 - Immaculate
As a cradle Catholic I often misunderstood the feast of the Immaculate Conception. I thought it was when Mary was born. It wasn't until I was a young adult when I heard a priest explain that it was it was about her conception; she was conceived without sin -- she was "immaculate". When I think of the word immaculate, I often have a negative reaction. It brings me back to my years as a young child having to get my room "immaculate"; a state of cleanliness that seemed impossible to achieve. As the years passed, I have a greater appreciation for the word and for Mary's fiat and her complete submission to being a vessel for God, a holy tabernacle for our Lord. I think the reason why I had a negative reaction to the word "immaculate" as a child was the call to obedience to cleanliness. I was quite a disorganized child, and the thought of organizing myself and my space overwhelmed me. The thought of having anything immaculate seemed like such a feat and having to do it by myself was too much to absorb. As I reflect on Mary's faith and complete submission, I am reminded that when life seems overwhelming, I am not alone; I can call upon her and Jesus to be with me to create an immaculate, obedient response to what God is calling me to do. Bianca Hennager
December 9, 2023 - Patience as a Virtue
Advent brings about the yearning for something special coming. For me it is always such a busy time of year, preparing for Christ's birth, preparing for the feasting during the 12 days of Christmas and the building up of anticipation. I find myself growing in excitement as the day draws closer and then when the big day happens there is a let down of emotions. I try to prepare myself for it each year but somehow it sneaks up on me. In the anticipation of Christ's coming, I lack patience. I want to be ready, and I want everything to be "right", so I busily prepare the house and myself for what I think it means. In the haste of my preparations, I can lose sight of the more meaningful things that could help draw me closer to Christ: serving others, serving my family, doing small things with great love to show those closest to me how much they matter. Through faith I am reminded that Christ dwells in each of us. During this time it is imperative that I grow my patience to experience Christ in each person I encounter. Bianca Hennager
December 10, 2023 - Nike Half Marathon
I am not a runner by habit, nor do I like to run. I had a friend who asked if I wanted to join her group for the Nike Half Marathon and I thought it would be "fun". What I didn't realize is the amount of preparation it would take to get me "ready" to complete a half marathon. I began training in April, trying to run 2 miles. I struggled as I was out of shape and am not a runner. My breathing was off, and I was not able to catch my breath a mile into the run. My runner friends kept encouraging me and telling me that after mile 3 or 4 it gets easier. I never found that it got easier, but over the months, I increased my mileage. Soon 7 miles didn't seem so strange to complete. It was a combination of running/walking, but I was proud of getting the miles in. In September, I was up to 9-10 miles and found that I was not able to get beyond that mark. I was concerned as the date of the event drew closer. I had expected to get to 13 miles in the training, but I never did reach that mark. On the day of the event, I was unsure if I was going to be able to complete the course, but I went with trust in the training that I had completed, and the support of my friends and family. As mile 10 drew near, I saw people on the sidelines getting carried off the course, and people "hitting the wall". I was hurting and I wanted to quit but I kept my eyes on the prize. Thankfully, I was able to successfully complete the half marathon. During preparation, I could never have imagined what it would feel like to complete such a course.
I liken this experience to our preparations in Advent; there is a lot of work that goes into getting our hearts, minds, and souls ready for the big event. May this season of Advent draw us into the important preparations we need to do to be ready to welcome Christ into our hearts and homes. Bianca Hennager
Reflections for Nov. 27-Dec. 3, 2023
November 27, 2023 - Letting Go Rituals
Recently I came across an article that suggested using rituals as a means of letting go of the hurtful past, whether it was caused by someone else or yourself. Letting go can be difficult, but the author suggested a powerful healing tool: take a walk. With each step name something you would like to let go of.
I reflected on what this walk would look like for me. Would I just inch along, struggling for content, or would I be flooded by burdens I couldn’t wait to unload? Would I walk 100 yards or end up running a 5K? I have a hunch I would be hitting long distances!
Letting go is a huge challenge for me, and I love the idea of this exercise; God doesn’t want us to carry our burdens and hurt like a heavy yoke. He has made it clear throughout history that we should let go and let him take over. Hopefully I can put that into action!
Jen Payan
November 28, 2023 - Habits
Not long ago I listened to a motivational podcast that stressed the importance of changing daily habits. It called for using the “love” around you by working for unity and in service of others to find your strength and will power. I felt that the speaker kept alluding to the notion of a higher power, but was just afraid to name it, perhaps in fear of alienating some of his audience. I wanted to yell back at him – “just say it – you need God, God is love!”
There have been many books written, speeches given, and podcasts recorded about breaking unhealthy habits and starting new healthier ones. Endless advice is given about what actions can be taken to bring about change in our life. I’ve come to realize putting these things into practice is always the most difficult part and just relying on my own willpower leads to failure. But the AA/NA 12 step program provides a great example of the importance of giving it to a higher power. Giving it to God always seems to be the most powerful support you can get.
Jen Payan
November 29, 2023 - Kangaroo Care
One of the favorite parts of my job as a NICU nurse is helping a parent hold their newborn for the first time. However, since most NICU babies are medically fragile, they can be attached to IVs, monitors, and ventilators, making the move from their isolette into their parent’s arms for “kangaroo care “a challenge. Parents are often very nervous and I try to put them at ease.
The other evening, I had the privilege of assisting a dad hold his baby for the first time. But this was no ordinary dad. He was a former college football player who stood 6’8’’ and weighed close to 300 pounds; his preemie weighed 1 pound and 2 ounces. I noticed sweat had collected on his face and his hands were shaking. I offered words of encouragement and assured him he could do it and how badly his infant needed to be skin to skin with him. As the baby snuggled into his chest and I covered them with a blanket, tears started rolling down his cheeks. I was so moved by the thought of this huge strong man brought to his most vulnerable state by this tiny infant. All of the love, anxiety, fear, and tenderness came together at that moment for him. It was a beautiful sight.
It reminded me to be open to other’s vulnerabilities, despite how they come across and not to make assumptions about what a person’s needs may be based only on how they look.
Jen Payan
November 30, 3023 - The Debrief
In emergency care there is a process called a “debriefing” that is done after especially difficult calls. It can be utilized after a complex medical call involving CPR or trauma.
It’s also done after an incident that has the potential to be emotionally disturbing, maybe involving abuse, children, or a very poor outcome. When I started in the profession 30 years ago this process was not in place. Therefore, health care workers were left to ruminate on these disturbing things on their own. As a consequence, mental health issues became prevalent in first responders and hospital staff. Depression, addiction, and suicide were the products of these difficult calls. However, over the years experts studied ways to help with this. One of the answers was the “debrief”. It took providers off duty for a short period and opened up dialog about the incident. You could discuss what happened, how things were handled and how well you worked as a team. You could discuss the good things that you did and the things you might have done better. You could also share how you felt.
This was a huge relief. It allowed everyone to process in a healthy way and release some of the stress and grief associated with the occurrence. Taking a pause and simply talking things over can be so healthy, and possibly even lifesaving. I like to think of this as a reminder and model for my prayer life also. Stopping and decompressing with God can bring enormous peace. He is always available for a good debriefing.
Jen Payan
December 1, 2023 - The Day My Brain Stopped Working
About 5 years ago I was on a family vacation in a small beach town. I was out for a run when I tripped and fell, literally on my head, on the concrete sidewalk. I suffered a concussion and had to deal with neurological issues for about a month after the incident. At one point, I had difficultly just dialing my phone. I felt like my brain was scrambled! It was the most humbling experience.
I was struggling to understand why this had happened to me. I think that most of us feel that way when we are suffering. What started to become apparent to me, however, was that there were a few people in my life who were struggling with memory issues. I realized that I had been given the gift of empathy. The concussion had given me a whole new perspective. God seemed to have given me a very poignant message!
I guess sometimes God’s message is right in front of us, we just need to pay attention – or we may be literally hit on the head with it!
Jen Payan
December 2, 2023 - Game Day
Much to my husband’s dismay, I don’t enjoy watching football. When I have tried to settle in and watch a game I’ve quickly been thrown off by the whistles and penalty flags. Each one signifies some rule that has been broken, delaying the game and completely confusing me. Then my husband has to explain each rule until we are both exasperated and I just pick up a book or find something else to do.
In studying the book of Acts recently, I found a great similarity with the layering of the rules of football and the rules Jesus was coming to change. He was there to release his people from the laws they kept layering over the laws of Moses. They had rules for keeping the Sabbath, what they could eat and who they could eat with, and for worshipping at the temple, just to name a few. The rules had become so difficult that they were keeping the people from God, just like those football rules keep me from watching football!
Jesus gave us the new rules –‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.” Mark 12:30-31
Thank our God that he sent Jesus to clarify for us!
Jen Payan
December 3, 2023 - Keeping the Holidays Holy
As Advent begins this year, I find myself concerned about all of the things I need to accomplish before Christmas. The countdown to purchase gifts, organize a menu, and make travel arrangements is foremost in my mind. To be honest, the lighting of the pink candle sometimes just signifies that I’m running out of time to get everything done! (That was a difficult confession to make, but hopefully relatable.) In the midst of the stress and check off lists the spirit of Advent seems to take a back burner.
This year I plan on taking inventory. By deciding what the most important things about the holidays are and aligning them with my values, I can switch the focus to the actual celebration of Jesus in my life. I can focus on quality time with my family and friends. Hopefully, as the candles are lit each Sunday, I will embrace God bringing light into the world and will celebrate the hope, peace, joy, and love that they signify.
Jen Payan
Reflections for Nov. 20-26, 2023
November 20, 2023 - Listen Up!
We all have ears, and we all are capable of listening. We hear music, we hear conversations, speeches, warning sounds, the murmur of a brook, the peal of thunder, the cry of a child. But it is the comprehension of what we hear that feeds our intellect. Jesus made it explicit when he reminded his apostles to hear from the heart, to really listen to what is being transmitted, and then to internalize hearing from the soul. I often find myself hearing, but not really listening. I’m sure the apostles were doing the same. They weren’t really understanding because they weren’t putting it all together.
The apostles were visited by the Holy Spirit and given the gift of hearing, understanding, and communication. They ultimately went on to promulgate the truths that Jesus taught them, and became the very pillars of the church, the promotors of the new Christian faith, the communicators, the spreaders of the teachings they heard. I hope that I will make the transition to listening from the heart, and therefore to the listening that involves the soul.
The word of God is delivered to us through the old and new testaments. It is delivered to us through the sermons and homilies of our church leaders. Am I really listening?
Don Eagle
November 21, 2023 - Can I Have This Dance?
I’ve always been a great lover of music. In years gone by, a lot of the music had a message connected to it. Hence the rise of the big folk song groups, country music, and of course the classical stuff. We were left to wonder about what was thrown off the Tallahatchie bridge, or who was murdered in the song about Tom Dooley. We deciphered the drama behind the 1812 overture, and experienced the majesty and power behind Beethoven’s 9th symphony. The haunting melodies and enchanting lyrics were not only memorable, but were profound. They resonated. I keep coming back to the lyrics of Ann Murray’s “Can I have this dance for the rest of my life” as a life story of love, desire, and commitment. These lyrics refer to life itself as a dance: moving, flowing, touching, feeling, embracing, and holding close as you circle the dance floor of life. It is an invitation to invite someone to come dance with you, to share all of the experiences of life. It refers to committed love from the heart, all the while praising that bond in the context of a joyful dance.
One of the songs we sing at Mass refers to a dance; the music is filled with exuberance and joy. To me, it is reflective of the joyful fulfillment of sharing. It is a wondrous statement of love. It is far reaching. It is a special invitation to come dance with me for the rest of my life.
Don Eagle
November 22, 2023 - John Bobo
Years ago during a family get together at Lake Tahoe, all of the adults and six grandchildren went out to dinner. The restaurant was crowded, causing a long wait for a large-party table. Children could become antsy and disruptive, so our son Paul gathered them all around him and told them the story of John Bobo, a troll that lived beneath a bridge. Suddenly, all of the children became quiet and sat at his feet in rapt attention. Their faces are burned in my memory as I recall how they listened with delight: interrupting, making comments, questioning, laughing, and listening as their uncle (and father) kept their attention, unwinding the adventures of John Bobo. He kept them enthralled until we were seated, and to this day, the kids remember the adventures of the troll. Some of them have written stories themselves about John, and it is a legacy forever in the whole family.
Today when I remember Paul with the children gathered around him, I think of Jesus, doing the same thing, interacting, teaching, and keeping the attention of the kids at his feet. It also leads me to think of Jesus as a powerful and loving storyteller and of his communion with children. Things haven’t changed much in the intervening 2000 years it seems, as children everywhere respond to the loving attention given to them when stories are shared by caring adults. I somehow see Jesus in all of this.
Don Eagle
November 23, 2023 – Thanksgiving
I love Thanksgiving. Of all the holidays, it is the most authentic one. Gathering the family around the table and giving thanks to God is what it’s all about. It is the most travelled time of year as families come together. It is truly a heart-felt time, with a minimum of stress and a maximum of getting together with those you love. It is a time of sharing. It is a celebration built around feasting. I am reminded of the marriage at Cana where Jesus had a hand in joining in, and being a part of a celebration that involved feasting. It is a time of reaching out to share that feeling of togetherness and to share our humanity with those less fortunate. Jesus’ mission on earth was to teach us to love one another, Thanksgiving is all about that. Racial, ethnic, and other discriminatory barriers seem to fall away as we celebrate each other, and give thanks and immense gratitude for the blessings we have received from God’s hands. We give thanks for who we are, what we are, and where we are. And our prayer is this: that the spirit of Thanksgiving spread.
Of course turkeys may not be quite so on board with this holiday. Ben Franklin thought turkeys should be the national bird. I am thankful that the turkey became the symbol of thanksgiving and the eagle wound up as our national symbol. So, thank you — all you turkeys, and Happy Thanksgiving to all.
Don Eagle
November 24, 2023 - Things in the Sky That Are Filled with Water.
One of the themes of Catholic Social Teaching is Care for God’s Creation: being good stewards of our beautiful planet. Kurt wrote a reflection on clouds not long ago. Funny, I was planning to write about clouds; now I’ll refer to them as white fluffy things in the sky filled with water.
Laying on your back and looking at the sky allows you many things. When your soul is occupied with clouds in spangled nights, you can recall the joy of simpler moments. Aa a child, I was in awe of all of creation. Stupid stuff important only to a child, comes awake now and then. I didn’t know who loved me or not, but I pulled a daisy apart, petal by petal to find out. I lay spread-eagled across the snow, moved my limbs, and made angels come and go. There were bees caught in jelly glasses, and in winter, the whirlwind dances of snowflakes. There was the heady smell of spring lilacs and the call of loons in autumn; the deep throated thunder of a summer storm and the serene bright quiet of a winter’s morn. That cloud over there reminds me of blueberry bushes or maybe my BB gun. That one seemed like my toy sailboat. Good grief, what fun! The clouds come and go rolling across the heavens as the Almighty’s finger traces joy across the sky.
As I meditate thus, I’m hoping that my children may someday, too, wake up and say “Thank you God, for letting me experience your universe for eternity.”
Don Eagle
November 25, 2023 - Need to Simplify.
There are times that I feel just overwhelmed with the intricacies of daily life, and in this case, of believing. It seems that the more you think about it, the more questions arise. For instance, what did Jesus do for the first 30 years of his life? Did he have any friends? What did he do to help his parents? Did he like to fish? Go places? Know how to write?
Or, when he became an adult, how did he earn money? I don’t recall him near a lake or sea, yet he chose fishermen to become apostles. We know Jesus as living a simple life, yet he did like to eat out, and the church he founded seems far from simple today. The land of his birth was not the land that became the seat of his church. It was not known if he ever went to school, yet he was looked upon as a rabbi, or teacher.
We are dealt some very simple facts about Jesus. Yet there are inconsistencies along the way. Asking these questions though in many cases, can cause us somehow to miss the point of what he was doing. He was an excellent teacher and storyteller who shared a vision among his followers about the kingdom of God, and His vision expressed the simple message of hope, faith and love which transformed millions of lives.
Don Eagle
November 26, 2023 - A Christmas Story
With Turkey Day over, we’re a month away from Christmas. Time to get caught up in the whirlwind. Though we’ve been hearing Christmas carols for months, you can now hear them nonstop. and you can even pick out your preferred style: Classical, country, pop, rock. Ugh!
It’s no wonder that Christmas has become a time of nostalgia. Through the millennia, we’ve become so caught up in the trappings of Christmas, that its real meaning of the joy God visited upon mankind when He sent his son to us with a message of love takes a back seat. We now have everything from musical snowmen, to grinches, reindeer with light-up noses, and of course, lots and lots of snow. Some would even have the three wise men riding their camels through the snow. (How many times has it snowed in Israel?)
Despite these distractions, I try to remember that Christmas is one of the most important days of the year, second only to Easter itself. It commemorates the birth of Jesus Christ and is celebrated by billions around the world. Most of us share gifts with our loved ones. I’ve written before about experiencing the love behind my greatest gift ever: of nuns who put together a whole priest’s outfit for an 8-year-old boy. My eyes still tear up when I think of the enormity of that gift, and how it so embodied that act of love that it is to me, the very essence of Christmas. I sincerely hope that you have the same.
P.S. I still have the outfit!
Don Eagle
Reflections for Nov. 13-19, 2023
November 13, 2023—Acts of Service
Last weekend I had the privilege of once again working at the mile 86 aid station of the Rio del Lago 100 mile race. I always work the overnight shift, offering water, electrolytes and nutrition to runners on their way back to Beal’s Point where they will cross the finish line of a ONE HUNDRED mile race! At an aid station this late in the race and after dark, there is more than just feeding people. Runners arrive at the aid station in various states. There are people running, walking, limping and leaning. It is a privilege to hear snippets of their stories as they carry on to the next check point. But what struck me the most last weekend was the support of others for the runners.
269 runners started the race, but there were hundreds—if not a thousand! —people there to support and serve these runners. Runners pick up “pacers” who accompany them through the dark, late miles of the race. These pacers get no accolades and no medals. They just run to help someone else cross a finish line. Volunteers stand for hours filling water bottles, providing snacks, and encouraging runners to keep moving even when they want to quit. At 3am there were friends and family showing up in a dark parking lot to meet their runners and cheer them on. I watched a volunteer take the arm of an injured runner and help him limp to a car when he had to quit the race with only 14 miles left to go. Watching strangers unite to help other strangers accomplish their goals is nothing short of inspiring.
Our Christian faith calls us to serve others. If we all showed up to help one another in our daily lives in the same way that people show up to serve others in a race, how much better would our world be?
Erin Gallawa
November 14, 2023—Thirteen
My girls hit a milestone this month when they became TEENAGERS! From the day we found out we were having twin girls, people warned me, “Just wait until they are teenagers!” Well, the wait is over! The truth is, I have always been excited for them to become teenagers. Teenagers are such beautiful, complicated people. I know that I have my share of hardships ahead, but I also know that this is a time in their life where they will learn and grow immensely. God has a plan for this stage of their life, and I am trusting that his hand will lead us all through their teen years. I feel blessed that we have our SS. Peter & Paul community to guide our family. Our community is rich in people who have already walked this road and are willing to share their experiences with us. I am also blessed to have my community of moms who are walking this journey with me!
Erin Gallawa
November 15, 2023—Escape Room
My daughters celebrated their birthday with an escape room with a few friends. I asked them if they wanted me to join them in the escape room in case they needed help with the clues. They answered with a definitive no! So I sat outside in the lobby and wondered if six middle schoolers could escape without me. I could hear them excitedly working together and discussing if they needed hints from the gamemaster. Again, I wondered if they were able to do this without my help. That is when I heard the communal scream of joy when they solved a major clue that unlocked a new room. For the next hour I listened to their chaos and smiled every time I heard them scream in celebration.
I like to imagine God sitting outside my little world, listening for my shouts of joy as I achieve accomplishments throughout my life. What a beautiful thought—to know that I am not really alone, as He waits outside for me, cheering for me along the way!
Erin Gallawa
November 16, 2023—Many Hands
We are part of a community swimming pool that is closed for seven months of the year. Additionally, the pool never opened last year due to leaking, so when we opened the gates in May for our annual workday, the property was like The Secret Garden—overgrown and untended for more than 18 months. The grass and weeds were above my knees; the trees and bushes were out of control. The fence needed new posts and the patio furniture needed cleaning. There was a lot of work to be done. I was overwhelmed when I walked through the gate!
What was wonderful about the cleanup day was how quickly the work was completed with so many hands. In just a few hours the major work was done, thanks to all the pool members who showed up with their tools, their hands and their willingness to work. I was astonished at how much could be accomplished in a short time when so many shared their gifts. In late September when we closed the pool for the season, we did the work in reverse, preparing the property for winter.
Our parish life is no different. To celebrate the Mass requires the talents of so many parishioners. If a few had to do all the work, it would be too much. But when everyone comes to the Church and uses their gifts to serve, it happens quickly, efficiently and allows everyone to contribute at whatever level is comfortable for them. So let us come to the Church eager to serve in whatever way God has called us!
Erin Gallawa
November 17, 2023—Circles Have no End
I have been reading a book that is a little bit missing person and a lot of family drama. I am desperate to get to the end as I expect a great twist or a surprise ending. Tonight as I realized that I am almost finished, I considered the duality of my feelings. I am thrilled to find out what will happen and yet already sad that it will be over. I have felt this so many times in my life—the anticipation and sadness that accompanies endings. As I considered whether this might be true in my faith life, I realized that the nature of the Church calendar means that we don’t have these abrupt finishes that leave us wanting. The calendar is cyclical and always keeps us grounded in the message of Christ, even after the celebratory seasons of Christmas and Easter. The Mass is also comforting at all stages. Whether we gather on Sunday, for Baptism, for Holy Matrimony or to have a funeral Mass, the Mass and the Eucharist remain constant, providing stability and predictability which makes the Church feel safe. I am grateful that in a world that chases thrills and new, exciting things, the Church remains steady.
Erin Gallawa
November 18, 2023—Loss
This has been a year of loss for my family. My husband and I lost five grandparents between us. In August, we also had to say goodbye to our family dog. My children have attended too many funerals and bravely chose to be present as we said goodbye to our black lab. In all our sadness, there has also been a lot of beauty. We were granted so many moments to be truly present with our family. There have been opportunities to look at old photographs and remember the good times we shared with our loved ones. I walked through the doors of houses I loved and poured through items that remind me of women who I loved deeply. The scripture that comes to mind is “Behold, I make all things new” (Revelations 21:5) as I reflect on how these deaths have brought transformation in my life. While these losses broke my heart, they also created opportunities for new growth. I am grateful for a God who can take my pain and create something new in me.
Erin Gallawa
November 19, 2023—Yosemite
I had the opportunity to chaperone the 8th grade trip to Yosemite last month. I have been to Yosemite many times and it is always a place where I can easily find God. Traveling with these students was a beautiful way to experience God’s creation anew, through the lens of these great kids. In the book of Genesis, we read about a loving God who created the earth, the sky, the sun, the moon and the stars. Each plant, each animal and each stone was placed here with purpose. Then God created humanity and invited us to share in this creation. He gave humanity the privilege to enjoy this earth and the responsibility to care for it. There in Yosemite it is easy to feel the presence of God—in the valley formed by a glacier, in the water falling from high atop the valley walls, and in the towering rocks of El Capitan and Half Dome. God is there and here, with us always when we choose to open our eyes to see him, open our ears to hear him, and open our hearts to find him in the world around us.
Erin Gallawa
Reflections for Nov. 6-12, 2023
November 6, 2023 - Let the Children Come… for the Kingdom of God Belongs to Such as These
This is written for all the parents of children and to their dear little ones. You are wonderful, and God reminds me through you that we journey in our faith as a large, multigenerational family. Jesus is present to me in the exuberant child that wants a high five and in the shy one who peaks out behind, and in the children who want to dance to the music. Doesn’t God invite us to dance?? To make a joyful noise? I think how much better I would be if I was comfortable wearing my princess dress to church and twirling with abandonment…remembering that I am the daughter of the King of Kings.
God bless the children! The child who was munching on crackers and doesn’t understand why she can’t have what the priest just gave mom. The child who cries “mine!” a little too loud when his brother takes his toy. The squeals from intentional nudges of sibling rivalry and the overly enthusiastic sisterly hug that produces the same sound. What if these all were lessons for us from God?? I think these are reminders about what the Kingdom of God is like, what we are called to be… joyful, free, loving, trusting children who know they are loved. So, when I find a Cheerio on the floor or a little toy car drives by from the pew behind me, I will give thanks.
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio
November 7, 2023 - The Hidden Treasure
The kingdom of heaven is like a treasure hidden in a field. When a man finds it, he sells all that he has and buys the field. (Matt 13:44) It has only been later in life that I have learned to read the parables through multiple lenses. For example, I always assumed that the Kingdom of God was the treasure that I was to find and sell all I have in order to possess it. And while that understanding has its own lessons for me, I realize there is another way to read the story. What if I am the treasure that God seeks, that God “sells everything to have?” Is it possible that this parable is about God’s unconditional love for us? …That I experience the Kingdom of God living in this world knowing that I am loved so deeply that God gives God’s very self away in order to have me? But What a beautiful love story! It is the story of Jesus.
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio
November 8, 2023 - God’s Tears
A reflection I read recently begins “Dear grieving God, thou infinitely broken-hearted, how gracious of you that you abide with us when we are so cruel, that you hold us faithfully even as we destroy each other and wound your Creation, that you give us your heart even as we break it.” As I write this, the news coverage of the attacks by Hamas on Israel and Israel’s retaliation are streaming 24/7. And as terrible as that reality is, I am also aware that it is not the only place in the world where people engage in horrific acts of violence.
While some try to offer analysis of what has happened and why, I wonder if we have become so used to human cruelty that we have found ways to rationalize it or we have become numb. We say a prayer, but we know there will continue to be wars, that human beings will continue to have an incredible capacity for evil and destruction. Instead of asking how can God let this happen, I will remember God’s broken heart and the God that shares my pain, shares my suffering, and holds us all until the world is healed.
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio
November 9, 20223 - Living in the Tragic Gap
A presentation by Parker Palmer gave me inspiration during these times when so much seems wrong and broken in the world. He said, as Christians, we are called to live in the tragic gap. Listening to him explore this idea, I understand him to mean that we are called, like Jesus, to not avoid the suffering in the world, but also not to expect that we can fix it all. The gap is tragic because it persists. He says, “our task is not to close the gap, but to keep standing and acting in the gap, doing whatever we can in the service of love, truth and justice without losing heart when we wake up the next morning to find the gaps still there.” What a challenge that is for me! I realize how much I want to control my experiences. I want to be effective—my actions should solve problems, change things for the better! I am trained to be results-oriented! And while sometimes I do see results, Parker Palmer cautions us that expecting outcomes can cause us to make our vision smaller. I might start taking on only those tasks that have a high probability of success. Or I might give up out of frustration and feel defeated. Jesus is my best teacher and example. As a part of the Body of Christ, I need to do whatever I can, trusting that I am but one part of the body, and that Christ is the head.
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio
November 10, 2023 - The Kingdom of God
The parable of the workers in the vineyard in Matthew 20:1-16 is a familiar one I have heard since childhood. A landowner goes out early in the morning and hires workers and agrees to pay them the daily wage. He goes out again later in the day and makes the same agreement with more workers, and finally hires the last crew towards the end of the day. At pay time, he pays them all the same amount—the full day’s wage. It is a story about the Kingdom of God and what God, the vineyard owner, is like. God is generous. He rewards the latecomers just as he does those who have worked all day – code for those who have always been believers, right? I heard a homily years ago that turned that upside down for me. The priest was from a poor part of the world and understood how day labor works. He explained that workers go out at sunrise to wait in hopes of being chosen for work. The strong and the young are always selected first. The old, the sick, the injured, the disabled are chosen last or not at all. In a country without a social safety net, work is the only way to survive. Now when I hear that parable, I recognize God’s preferential option for the poor. The priority that is given to the well-being of the poor and powerless of society in the teachings and commands of God.
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio
November 11, 2023 - Love One Another—Everyone???
As I write this, it is only a day after the mass shooting in the small community of Lewiston, Maine. On the way to church, the radio commentator was reflecting on the families and friends in church praying for the 18 victims of the shooting. It made me think, we pray for 18, not 19? Are we not also to pray for the shooter who did such a terrible thing and then took his own life? At Mass the gospel reading, which I had not read in advance, was about the greatest commandments—Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and love your neighbor as yourself. Deacon Dave gave a beautiful homily on who is our neighbor, referencing the first reading from Exodus 22:20. It made it clear that we are to love those least cared for in our world, those who would be easy to dismiss, to discard, to hate. Lord, how can I learn to love my enemy? To have compassion for those who suffer and those who cause suffering for others? Lord, teach me to love as you love.
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio
November 12, 2024 - Walking in the Dark
I have sometimes wondered how Christian metaphors about light get misunderstood in our success-oriented culture which associates light with knowing, certainty and even good fortune. I love reflections on Holy Darkness, the unknown, the big, unfathomable God of Mystery. The God of holy darkness is with me in my most challenging and painful moments. God walks with me, carries me, when I have no energy or ability to carry myself. Sometimes I only see in hindsight how I was held and sustained through a painful time of loss or uprootedness. God knows our wounds, and Jesus knows what it is to be wounded. Thomas Merton said, in the Catholic tradition next time you're about to receive the Eucharist, realize someone's taking perfectly good care of you.
December 22 is the winter solstice, the darkest, shortest day of the year, and it comes during Advent, a time of anticipation. I try to be present to the darkness of the season, to slow down, to notice. I think of animals hibernating in their dens, the dark warmth of the womb, seeds in the ground… new beginnings waiting for their time. And as we welcome Christmas singing, Christ be our Light!, I am grateful for God who sustains us in the dark as well.
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio
Reflections for Oct. 30-Nov. 5, 2023
October 30, 2023 - A Dog
I never had a pet. There was a goldfish that I had as a child and my youngest son had a pet rabbit for a few years, but nothing like a dog. Because of his work requirements, we inherited our oldest sons terrier/ border collie mix. At the age of 69, I have the first real pet in my house. Soon, I wondered why God had placed this creature in my life. I only saw the obligations: feeding, walking, bathing, socialization classes, veterinary bills. I finally realized the answer was simple.
I have struggled with the idea of being loved unconditionally by God. This has expressed itself in a poor self-image when younger, a self-deprecating personality style, a recurrent fear of missing out, second guessing clear decisions. Even the words of Fr. Henri Nouwen about how we are all the Beloved only barely altered my struggle. Then I heard a simple song about God and dog, and it finally hit me! God placed Marley, the dog, in my life to be a constant reminder of his unconditional love and presence regardless of how good or sinful I am, regardless of how far I walk away from Him. God and dog are always there, always eagerly awaiting my return, and come running when I am near. Marley will bark at any animal entering our yard or any sound at the front door and is overly protective of my wife. These are just other ways that he shows his love.
Ray Frink
October 31, 2023 - Life Within
The author Norman Cousins said: “The tragedy of life is not death, but what we let die inside of us while we live.” As a young man I saw the world as a much bigger and more hopeful place than when I was more mature, when hopes and dreams were laid to rest because I was told to settle for a particular path in life. Some of my choices in life were limited by others’ self-interest, not by my growth. I think Jesus wanted something different for me. Jesus speaks of the love and trust of children, which I interpret as innocence, simplicity, and openness to God’s love. I wonder if Jesus also meant for me to nurture that wide-eyed belief that anything is possible. I am to keep hope alive. When I was baptized, received First Eucharist, and Confirmed I was told to keep that love of life and love of possibility alive in the Body of Christ.
I do not believe that there is only a single passion for a career or that there can be only one true love. I have believed for over 40 years and continue to believe that Christ does not want me to let age, pandemics, and the problems of the world, kill that flame of hope that burned so brightly as a child. With prayer I will not let anything more die inside of me while I live.
Ray Frink
November 1, 2023 - Touching the Unclean
I like movie music. Some of my favorite sequences are in The Sister Act movies. I relate. Nuns taught me for eight years; priests for another 4. I sang these songs as a youngster or heard them on the radio, and the pop song double meanings are both enlightening and entertaining. In these movies many conventions are cast aside to help the parish (or the sinner) that is portrayed grow, just as Jesus reached out to the sinners He met by recognizing where they were.
In Luke 5:12-16, every convention is cast aside. In Jesus’ time, a leper would have a bell attached to them. They would live in a separate community, shouting “Unclean” if anyone approached. They would keep a certain distance from anyone around them. An observant Jew like Jesus would never touch a leper. All these proscriptions are broken in this passage. Jews adopted these regulations out of fear that the unclean would contaminate the clean. Jesus shows me how I am a sinner. I am unclean. His Church is a church of the unclean. When challenged by the leaders of His day with whom Jesus had contact, His response can be found in Mark 2: 13-17: “… Jesus said to them, “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners.”
Ray Frink
November 2, 2023 - Please Persist
Over my life I have served parish life in many ways; the longest is as a lector. When I started out in high school and college, I lived during the early post Vatican II years where I was referred to as the Master of Ceremonies. My role was to lead the congregation in the new simple steps such as when to sit, stand, respond in English. I was also a lector. An observer early in my MC/lector career described me in action as a tall, white Frigidaire. This observer felt I was too stiff, too cool, not demonstrable enough in my role. Never quite convinced of the truth of this comment, I didn’t let this stop me from continuing.
I persisted. I kept practicing. I kept listening to expert lectors and watching how renowned speakers delivered their messages. I also read out loud in the bathroom and the shower. I accepted criticism when valid and resisted change when I thought the observer missed the point.
The apostles were not born to the role planned for them either. They unlearned old habits of communicating and learned new ones from Jesus. From the beginning Jesus called the apostles to be fishers of men and taught them how to do so. Jesus’ parables challenged their way of thinking: to serve, to forgive, to reach out. They learned to persist and we are blessed today because of that. I will continue that tradition.
Ray Frink
November 3, 2023 - Homeless Young Man
I have recently tried with more intensity to see the Holy Spirit at work in my life. I was driving to a dinner at SS Peter and Paul during afternoon rush hour and the route suggested by my GPS seemed unusual. I followed the route as described. Getting off the freeway, there was a young man sitting by the offramp, about the age of my sons. Without a hat, in the hot afternoon sun and with spasticity in his movements, his gestures suggested a neurologic condition. Growing up in a city and with the explosion of the homeless population, this was a scene that usually only briefly raised my concern, quickly forgotten as I went on my way. I cannot recall being as moved and feeling as desperately helpless as I did in that moment. I already give my time and treasure to social relief organizations. But seeing this young man, in desperate need of care, I thought there must be more I can do.
What was happening here? Did the Holy Spirit want me to drive an unusual route to accomplish my errands? Was I meant to see this young man and as a doctor be so moved by the myriad of medical issues he had not had addressed. This is not my area of expertise. There must be someone who has the needed skills. I will remember his face for a long time and ask each day on rising, Lord what can I do today.
Ray Frink
Saturday November 4, 2023 - One Life
I feel alive this Saturday morning. Besides the obvious because I am breathing and typing, I mean at 10 AM this has already been a good day. I woke up next to my wife of 43 yrs. I have prayed and read interesting articles about my faith and the synod. I’ve gotten two ideas for possible future reflections. My body is sore from exercise and volunteer work so the aches are welcome and satisfying. My recent memories include a lighthearted thought-provoking presentation at a L.O.V.E gathering, followed by a thoughtful, life enhancing, and nostalgic dinner with my wife afterward. The Thai food was excellent.
What about the rest of today? To quote a fellow reflection writer: “Lord, what am I going to do today.” I enjoy the luxury of options. Before the day is over, I will pray for the synod. This may be in quiet solitude in my office. I will spend some time in my shop trying to prepare some gifts of wood. I will review the financials and the schedules of the organizations I volunteer with and support. I will remember to take my medications and take time to meditate.
Today is a day of mild exercise. I will take a few minutes to play with the dog. I will read articles related to my prior career (which doesn’t seem to end- LOL). I realize I have one life, one body and God gave me both to enjoy his creation.
Ray Frink
November 5, 2023 - Delight
“The Lord takes delight in His people.” Psalm 149. I thought about the feeling of delight. I have felt the warmth and embrace of love. I have felt satisfaction with job and service. I have known gratitude. Delight is different.
Moments of delight bring a warm smile with hints of laughter to my face. Delightful moments are occasions when an observer might think me a little crazy and I don’t care. Delight is when I see a friend fully embrace his faith. Delight is when children sing together at Mass. Delight is when I think I am seeing one daughter of a friend as an altar server and realize that it is her younger sister, now grown from a toddler to a composed person. Delight is when a younger colleague is going to branch out to new experiences and a new career or start a family. Delight is when I see my granddaughter swim or my goddaughter find love and motherhood. Delight is the expression on the face of my wife when she plays with and teaches our granddaughter. Delight is knowing one son deeply loves his daughter and the other son has grown into a person of service while still able to find the childlike moment is any situation. Delight is reading another’s reflection and cherishing the beauty in their lives. Delight is watching the antics of our dog and knowing the wonders of nature. Delight is observing delight. Thank you, God, for moments of delight.
Ray Frink
Reflections for Oct. 23-29, 2023
October 23, 2023 – Social Justice
The RCIA team meets periodically to assign topics for the weekly sessions. Normally Jane and Erin do the sessions on Catholic Social Justice. This year Erin was not going to be available, so I chose to present it. In years past when I was in those sessions, I was always a little guarded because the term “social justice” had a negative connotation for me. So, for me to properly talk about Catholic Social Justice, I first had to fully understand it. I did a lot of research on how this term came about. The term was first coined by a French priest in 1840 but I soon realized the concept has always been there from the beginning. There are 7 principles of social justice: Dignity for the human person, Promotion of the family, Rights and Responsibilities, Option for the poor and vulnerable, Dignity of Work and the Rights of Workers, Solidarity, and Care for Creation. In my research I found that all these principles are based in scripture, from Genesis to the letters of the apostles. I found dozens of scripture readings for each of these, especially the option for the poor. In preparing for that session, I now understand the Catholic meaning. We are called to bring about the Kingdom of God on earth. And for me that means each of the 7 principles must be part of my life and how I live my life in relation to each of them.
Kurt Peterson
October 24, 2023 - Clouds
I recently watched a movie called Bakhita. It is about a slave who was sold to over four different masters. She was the nanny to her last master’s daughter in Italy, where she eventually became a Christian and a Nun. In 2000 she was declared a saint. There is a line in the movie where Bakhita tells a young woman, who is in despair, “The sun is always there even when the clouds hide it sometimes.” That is so true: the sun is always there; it may be hidden sometimes, and I cannot see it, but it is still there. And you know what? The Son is always there too. Jesus is always with me. I know he is present when I feel life is going well but when the clouds of life overshadow me, and I become anxious or afraid He is harder to see. It is during those cloudy times that I call out to Him to hear His voice. Sometimes it is faint, sometimes it is silent, but I believe He is still there. Soon I can start to see Him in the faces of the people around me who are there to help me. Jesus is always present no matter what the situation is, I just have to be open to see Him.
Kurt Peterson
October 25, 2023 – GPS
As a Realtor I spend a good deal of time on the road going from house to house with my clients or just previewing houses for them. The GPS navigation on my phone is one of my most used apps next to my text app. Sometimes I may miss a turn or if there is a road work detour, my phone will tell me ‘Recalculating” and map out another way to get me back on the right path to my destination. Life is a journey and as a Catholic Christian the house I am traveling towards is the house that Jesus has prepared for me. The morals that I have learned in life, the teachings of the church and my own conscience are all part of my spiritual GPS. They do a very good job of keeping me going in the right direction, but sometimes through my selfish actions I can take a wrong turn and head to a dead end. When that happens, the church has a way of correcting me through the sacraments. The sacraments are our GPS: they will show the way to get back on the right path. But just like my phone’s GPS, it will only guide me if I listen and follow the map. So the next time I have taken a wrong turn and I hear the Holy Spirit say “recalculating”, I hope I am listening.
Kurt Peterson
October 26, 2023 – Suffering
When we see and hear all that is happening around us, it can seem like the whole world is suffering. And it seems that since COVID, the world just goes from one suffering to the next. Sometimes I feel overwhelmed by it all. But as a Catholic I am called to pick up my cross and follow Christ. We talked about this recently at Wake Up. Did we solve anything? No, but I did come away from it with some clarity. I will never know the full reason for why there is suffering in the world, but I do know that if I embrace my suffering, I will come out of it a better person. Suffering happens, it is a part of life and it doesn’t matter if I have faith or not. I can either choose to let the suffering consume me, becoming bitter and angry, or I can take that suffering and gain from it. It is during those times I look to the Saints as an example to help me. The devil tells us that we shouldn’t have to suffer and when we listen to him, we end up suffering even more. But if I use that suffering as a sacrifice and follow Jesus I will get to the other side of suffering. Nobody wants to suffer, even Jesus asked God to let the cup of suffering pass Him by, but He also embraced it as a sacrifice for you and me. I am so grateful He did.
Kurt Peterson
October 27, 2023 – Restoration
My mother-in-law lived with us for 22 years until she passed in February of this year. Recently I turned her room into my office. It was a gradual change, moving out many of her things while keeping a few but in a different way. On my bookshelf I have her Lady of Guadalupe statue. On my credenza, I have her Sacred Heart painting and I care for two of her plants that are in the office. The room no longer looks like her room but with these things there, I always feel her presence. A favorite piece of hers was the dresser which she loved. I recently repainted it for our youngest daughter to use in our grandson’s room. That dresser will also be a reminder of her to them. Through restoration old things become new and gain a new purpose. Our faith is like that. When I allow Christ to come into my life, my old self dies, and I become alive with a new purpose. I have seen how He has brought new purpose to my life.
Kurt Peterson
October 28 2023 – Community
I am so unbelievably blessed to be part of this community of SS Peter & Paul. The members of the 5:00 p.m. Sunday music group, the men of Wake-up, the couples of Love Ministry and my fellow members of RCIA are just some of the people that have given me so much over the years. The opportunities we have here in the parish are vast and over the last 22 years this community has allowed me to flourish as a person and a Catholic. But it is not only the people that have created such a great community. It is also the pastors that we have had over the years. Fr Dillion, Fr Stanley and Fr Bony have helped guide this parish into what it is today. They have allowed the members to discover a need and develop a ministry for it. There is truly a place for everyone to find acceptance, love, friendship, and purpose here. If you have been sitting on the fence about getting involved, jump off that fence and do it! You will find your life will never be the same.
Kurt Peterson
October 29, 2023 – Music as a Community
I love playing the drums. I started playing when I was 14 and I am still playing 56 years later. The most special part of drumming is being able to play with other musicians. When I am playing with the musicians on Sunday at the 5:00 p.m. Mass, I feed off their energy. That energy moves me, and I become part of the music that becomes a spiritual connection not only with the musicians but also with the congregation that is participating by singing. I never feel that connection when I am practicing by myself. I can enter into the music, but that sense of connection only occurs when I am in community with everyone, and it is that connection that truly feeds me. Music is meant to be shared. It can connect us to each other no matter what our background is. It is one of God’s great gifts to us and an example of how He wants us to feel joy and love for one another.
Kurt Peterson
Reflections for Oct.16-22, 2023
October 16, 2023 - Our Generation (Gen X, Millennials, Gen Z)
Jesus scolded His generation for looking for signs while He prophesied His own glorious sign of Resurrection, referring to the sign of Jonah. The two main implications we find here are the resurrection and repentance of listeners of Jonah. (Ref. LK 11:29-32)
I always think about how blessed our generation is and how we know the mysteries through our traditions and teachings of the Church. But even though much is revealed, our generation does not seem to care for the signs revealed, and looks for more signs or is enthralled by miracles but not the Lord of Miracles; just like His contemporaries, many accepted, but others did not care for his given signs (death and resurrection).
What do present generations focus on regarding spiritual mysteries? Our deep concerns and worries are about our bodies, its health and its pleasure. How is our generation drawn into believing in God’s presence and mysteries? “We will not hide them from their descendants; we will tell the next generation the praiseworthy deeds of the Lord, his power, and the wonders he has done.” (Psalm 78:4) Let our lives be an inspiration to our generation, as people ‘setting our minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth’ (Ref. Col 3:2) and God’s gift of faith is given to every one of us who seeks for signs.
Bony
October 17, 2023 - Purity of Heart
The Pharisees disregarded Jesus because he did not observe the prescribed washing before meals. Then Jesus admonished them for their scrupulosity only in rituals and for not caring for the purity of the heart. (Ref. LK 11:37-41)
This reminds me of the rite within the baptism ceremony of wearing a white garment, symbolic of our heart and soul, and being called to keep it unstained. It is a baptismal covenant with God to keep the heart pure and to keep ourselves holy. ‘Blessed are the pure in heart, they will see God.’ (Mt.5:8). The Pharisees missed ‘seeing and experiencing’ the Messiah, for they limited themselves to rituals, forgetting the intentions and essence of these acts of piety.
Jesus further uses the analogy of washing the outside of the vessels, signifying the importance of examining our conscience every day, which could eventually lead us to the Sacrament of confession. It is a time of cleansing - ‘purify me from my sins, and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow. Create in me a clean heart, O God, and put a new and right spirit within me.” (Psalm 51:7 & 10)
Bony
October 18, 2023 - My Vocation
Jesus sent out 72 disciples saying, “Go on your way; behold, I am sending you like lambs among wolves.” (LK 10:1-9)
I always wonder how it is that I became a priest (many of my childhood friends also wonder the same). I strongly believe it is God’s work. It is not that I just chose this vocation, but God chose me. ‘You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you so that you might go and bear fruit—fruit that will last’ (John 15:16). The priesthood was not a very attractive ‘profession’ (the secular way of looking at priesthood as a profession not knowing the concept of vocation). I have witnessed this as a child. Growing up, I had seen agitation in the form of shouting slogans against the pastor of our parish. And I was in 3rd grade when I heard of an innocent priest who was imprisoned, accused of killing a woman. This was widely circulated in the news and caused disgrace to the church. Even though he was found innocent and released later, this priest and his family suffered torture. So, being a priest was not enticing to the younger generation. Still, I accepted a vocation to the priesthood because ‘it is a call’ with grace, for He has chosen me. Scandals of abuse and allegations against the Church continue even today. A vocation to the priesthood is not just someone’s choice of a profession but a call (vocation) from God.
Every call – religious life, single life, or married life – is a call (vocation) to be sent out to proclaim the good news of the Lord. There will be ‘wolves’ around us, but we have the Shepherd to guard the ‘lambs’
Bony
October 19, 2023 - The Atonement
To depict themselves as pious and righteous, the generation of Jesus’ time built monuments to the prophets to show that they were on the side of the prophets whom their forefathers had killed. Yet they did not follow the teachings of these prophets. So, Jesus said, this generation will be charged for their blood (Ref. LK 11:47-54)
It seems to be a difficult passage to comprehend. Why should I bear the guilt of my forefathers for which I am not responsible, and how can this be applicable to our generation?
The doctrine about original sin is the first lead to understand this passage. Humans are fragile and we easily fall. But original sin is removed and we are restored to an original state of grace by the rite of anointing in Baptism.
The Holy Church, at times, has publicly confessed failures of the past and sought pardon and forgiveness for past sins and the pain caused to others. It is the same with the Church today about the disgraced act of abuse. Acknowledging our sins and seeking God’s mercy and the forgiveness of others does not put us down but directs us on the path of grace and healing for the victims. Reflecting on Jesus's sacrifice on the cross answers my question: Why should I bear the sins of our forerunners? “He himself bore our sins in his body on the cross, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; by His wounds, we are healed.’ Peter 2: 2
Bony
October 20, 2023 - The Leaven
Beware of the leaven - Jesus speaks about the hypocrisy of his contemporary leaders (Ref. LK 12:1-7), and I wonder how this leavening effect happens today.
There are many opportunities today, exposing us to the leaven of the modern world: media, social media, selfish ideologies, attraction to unhealthy practices, etc. One is exposed to these ‘leavens’ at an early stage of life. It is concerning, and it can sometimes be deadly. It is also a social issue today.
In my childhood days, we were provided with books of saints and were required to read the Holy Bible, which planted the seeds for a good spiritual life. In those days, great significance was given to family prayers, celebrating all traditional devotions and involving the children in leading the prayers. Faith life was family-centered and it controlled all of the leavening distractions. I agree that advancement in different realms of life has its benefits, but I should ensure that my own faithful Christian life controls all aspects of my life, thoughts, and decisions. “If God is with us, who can be against us? (Rom. 8: 31), He will strengthen you and protect you from the evil one.” (2 Thes.3:3)
Bony
October 21, 2023 - Celebrities
I am sometimes amazed at people who go after celebrities. Celebrities are popular; we remember their names and some people adore and follow them. I often wonder how much time, energy, and money the media spends on carrying news of celebrities, intruding into their personal space, which I do not favor or care for, whether it is in politics, sports, or entertainment. Who are our own real celebrities in life? Saints? For me, every child I get to know is my celebrity. I can name them. They mesmerize me with their smile and inspire me with their innocence and simplicity. Jesus points to children and commands, ‘Be like them to enter the kingdom of God’ (Mt. 18:3). Every child is a celebrity and should be celebrated and followed.
Bony
October 22, 2023 - Act of Charity the Effect of Mercy.
Jesus takes us to a further level of purity of heart, which leads to compassionate acts of charity. (Ref. LK 11:37-41)
Give alms, and your hearts will be clean – a difficult to comprehend and widely criticized statement. Giving alms will clean your hearts? (The context: religious leaders of Jesus’ time gave more importance to rituals and the law and neglected compassion for the poor). Charity is not suggested as a price of forgiveness of our sins. But almsgiving reflects the goodness of our heart: compassionate, comforting, and soothing the suffering of the needy. Jesus applies the prescribed ritual of cleaning to the pure act of charity.
In my younger years, my parents encouraged us to give alms through our little hands to the beggars who came to our house occasionally. Later, I joined the St. Vincent De Paul Society for the students in the school. Even in college, we had a lot of opportunities to serve the needs of the poor. After ordination to the priesthood, for 12 years I served the Social Services of the diocese in India. It was rewarding and reminded me of my fellow brethren’s sufferings. A true reward is realized only when I am able to satisfy the least. I know many who share resources to help the poor—they follow the beatitude and partake in the divine cleansing action of God.
One feels content and satiated only when one feeds the hungry and quenches their thirst! Let us grace our souls with acts of charity – an act of Christian responsibility.
Bony
Reflections for Oct. 9-15, 2023
October 9, 2023 – Diaconate, Synodality and Wisdom
A couple of weeks ago Jane wrote a reflection on her experience of going through the diaconate formation program alongside me, taking all the same classes and being happy to have done so without seeking or wanting ordination. And a while back Pope Francis called upon all the Catholic people in the world to think about what “church” means and to speak openly about it in a process known as synodality. That is, he called for a synod of not only clergy but lay women and men, to bring forth ideas and questions and to discuss, in depth, where and/or how the Church should adapt to this age and what may come in the future. SSPP participated in this process with meetings of parishioners during a week over a year ago. One of the topics that came up was the question of women being ordained to the permanent diaconate.
I am totally open to the possibility of that as, historically, there were women deacons in the early church; also, there are many women I know of who would do the church a favor by responding to that call if it were issued. I embraced God’s call, although it took me awhile, and I don’t want to see such a call being denied someone because of gender or marital status. But I trust that the Holy Spirit who guides the Church will work these things out as we move through our shared understandings of Church, service and vocation.
Deacon David
October 10, 2023 – Body of Christ
In my last set of reflections there was one about “fences” in which I complained that I was having difficulty getting contractors or handymen to come to my home to fix a falling down fence. Almost immediately I got a call from Sarah, our SSPP office manager, telling me that one of our parishioners knew of a good handyman and left his phone number with Sarah. She called Kurt, her husband, and he called the handyman and arranged for him to go to our home. He responded quickly, did the repair and his charge was less than what I had expected to have to pay. I’m amazed, and gratified, that even though the tone of my reflection was a bit negative, more than one concerned reader took the time to respond to my need. There was a whole chain of people who took it upon themselves to deal with that problem, out of their concern for me. I experienced our community response as an example of what St. Paul continually exhorted the people of his time to do: to be the living body of Christ, each one working for the benefit of the other and the whole body. And while the whole body did not benefit, I certainly did and that made that exhortation came alive for me. Thank you and now, what can I do for you?
Deacon David
October 11, 2023 - Moving
During June and July of this year Jane and I put our Auburn home up for sale, and it sold within a couple of weeks. It was a short escrow so we had to hustle to get moved. In an incredible confluence of good luck our one daughter’s in-laws were leaving their home in Sac for five weeks to visit Italy and offered their residence to us while we searched for a home. We had many eyes looking for a suitable place and, lo and behold, not only one home, but two on a lot came up which met not only our needs but also those of another daughter and son in law who were looking for a home near us. We bought the property within four weeks of moving from Auburn. We moved in on Jane’s birthday with the help of five of our six children filling the house and back yard with, it seems, hundreds of boxes which we are still unpacking.
I was not eager to make this move. Our goal was to find a home near our two closest (geographically) daughters in Sacramento, but I felt like we had poured ourselves into the home we had made in Auburn. I didn’t think I had the energy to do that again. But I certainly do see the hand of God in our selling and buying with the help of many, many people. And I was reminded that with God all things are possible…I am now happily busy making this new house our home.
Deacon David
October 12, 2023 - More “Moving’ Story
On the final day of our move out of Auburn there was a lot of last minute activity. Our realtor, Kurt, went above and beyond in helping me know what to move and actually doing some of the hard, physical labor with me. As we were moving some lumber from where it had rested for the twenty years we owned the house, I stumbled, probably due to my foolishness in wearing sandals instead of work shoes. I didn’t realize until the next day that I’d injured my left foot. It was swollen and bright red, hurting like the dickens. Long story short I had to get medical help which included two ER visits, one overnight. No conclusive diagnosis but advice was to stay off it, keep it elevated and iced which I was happy to do. That injury led to my absence from church activities and duties for several weeks. When I reappeared at SSPP people knew about our move but didn’t know about the injury and there were many questions such as “you’re not leaving the parish are you? Where have you been? What’s wrong with your foot?” Funny thing is that I’m sort of gratified that people noticed I wasn’t around and were concerned enough to ask me about my absence.
I wondered if God sometimes feels that way, gratified when we acknowledge that we miss Him and happy when we leave hurts and injuries aside to come together as community. It is so good to be a part of this community of faith who care for one another.
Deacon David
October 13, 2023 - Parish Family
One recent weekend Jane and I attended Mass at a different time than we usually do. We normally go to the Saturday evening service, but Jane was scheduled to lector at a Sunday morning Mass that weekend. As we experienced the congregation that morning I was struck by some differences. Of course, the ushers and greeters were busy ushering and greeting and the choir was practicing along with several musicians. Folks in the pews were either praying, meditating or chatting with friends. In short, much the same as our regular mass…but then as Mass commenced, the voices of the larger assembly rose in song…different songs from what we sing on Saturday night ... I must say that the musicians/choir, lectors and eucharistic ministers were really “…on” in what they were called to do, again in a different way than what happens at the evening Mass, both on Saturday and Sunday. Each Mass has such a different character… each a community of believers who, just as the one we usually worshipped with, put so much of themselves into active participation whether joining in singing, listening or worshipping. Every Mass time has its own specialness, yet each is the same in that we are bound together in one faith, a family of believers sharing a meal given to us by Christ who is present at all Masses.
Deacon David
October 14, 2023 – A Child Shall Lead Us
I owe this reflection to a friend who wrote to us about an experience she recently had at Mass. She and her husband were settling into their pew when a lady, probably a grandmother, entered the pew in front of them with a little girl, maybe age 3 or younger. The girl’s whisper to her grandmom could be heard…”is Jesus coming?” Then at the first reading the little girl asked softly…”is Jesus coming?” As the priest approached the ambo for the gospel, the little girl waved gently saying “Hi, Jesus.” (Can you imagine how Father Bony would have responded to that?). Then, at the time of the consecration she chirped softly, like a little bird, “…Jesus, Jesus, Jesus, Jesus”. Later, during communion, our friends heard her humming the communion song: We are the body of Christ. The recessional was Take the Love of God with You as You Go. Without a doubt our friends left that mass not only taking the love of God with them, but nourished by the simple understanding that Jesus was indeed present, both in that little girl and to her. Would that we could all be such a joyful presence.
Deacon David
October 15, 2023 - Things Fall Apart
I have to admit that I get attached to things, inanimate things, and that causes me some distress. In the year 2000 I bought a used 1997 Ford Ranger pickup with only 34,000 miles on it. That truck, small as it is, has moved not only several children, some out of state, as well as Jane and me. Lots of runs to the dump and loans to the kids to haul stuff of their own. Simple maintenance has kept it going for an additional 200,000 miles. A couple of weeks ago, going west on I-80, puff, puff and it died. The death was confirmed by an AAA mechanic who said the repair would cost more than the truck is worth. So, what does this mean as a lesson in life? Wise people have written and spoken about such attachments and how they can deter one from being focused on the important things of our existence: faith, love, friendship…God. Even at my age that is a hard lesson but, as an old song says “…you can’t get to heaven on roller skates” (or a pickup truck). What’ll I do now? Pay attention to the words of people who eschew possessions in favor of giving their all to God and their fellow man/woman. Know that rust will take any and all of man’s creations, but Love endures and flourishes. Bye, bye good old truck and thanks for the memories but I’ve got something more important to maintain and grow. Now, where’s my bike?
Deacon David
Reflections for Oct. 2-8, 2023
Oct. 2, 2023- Tear Down This Wall!
At some point it happens to most of us. Life deals us a tough blow and we begin to develop a “wall” around us. Two months ago, I facilitated a day retreat at our parish and the conversation turned to a discussion about this tendency to close ourselves off to others when we are suffering. It is easy to develop a belief that we can take care of ourselves, and that we don’t need other people. In essence, we build an emotional wall around us which we think is protecting ourselves from further pain, but in reality, closes us off from receiving exactly what we need- the loving support of our family, friends, and faith community.
I remember hearing former President Reagan speak the words, “Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall!” back in 1987. The Berlin Wall came down two years later, and the line from his speech is etched in our collective memory. Perhaps it can remind me that walls are often unnecessary and, in some cases, quite harmful.
Open my heart, Lord, to be willing to bring down any wall that separates me from others. Darcy Wharton
Oct. 4, 2023- Hide Your Flaws?
When my daughters were young, I would tell them that they didn’t need to wear makeup, change their appearance, or wear certain clothes because they were already naturally beautiful. As all good children do, they would immediately point out my hypocrisy. Every day they would see me routinely curl my hair, put a bit of makeup on, and make sure that my outfit would at the very least look “flattering”.
I’m happy to say that all three of my daughters took my words to heart. I, on the other hand, am a work in process! (A spiritual director once told me that it’s best to remember that we are always “in process” and not always progressing!)
One of my favorite gospel stories is the Woman at the Well. Jesus approaches her, knows everything about her (even things that others would find unacceptable) and then invites her to see her worth through his eyes. She was able to let go of any concern about how others perceived her (or even how she perceived herself) and as a result, her life was forever changed.
Lord, help me see myself as you see me and never let me be afraid to let others see me as I am!
Darcy Wharton
Oct. 5, 2023- Lead by Example
It’s no surprise to those who know me that one of my favorite people was Fred Rogers. He warmed my heart as a child with his show Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood and as an adult, I am even more in awe of his accomplishments and his strong faith. Many people don’t know that he was a Presbyterian minister. His mission as an ordained minister, rather than serving as a church pastor, was to minister to children and their families through television. Apparently he wasn’t too fond of television and felt that perhaps he could use it to nurture those who would watch and listen.
In my opinion, he did just that. I remember the episode when he invited Officer Clemmons, a Black police officer on the show, to join him and cool his feet in a wading pool. I did not know it at the time, but this was his response to the fact that Black citizens were still being denied access to swimming pools. The year was 1969. This simple gesture (which included the two men sharing the same beach towel) was a powerful message to those watching. Fred Rogers knew the power of leading by example!
Words are not always necessary to evangelize. While I should never be afraid to vocalize the good news of Jesus, sometimes a simple action is all that is needed.
Thank you, Mr. Rogers, for being a good and faithful servant.
Darcy Wharton
Oct. 6, 2023- A Father’s Love
A few months ago, our youngest daughter Emily got married. In the initial planning, she wasn’t sure if she wanted to have all of the “traditional” aspects of a wedding reception. However, with a little bit of encouragement from her mother, her D.J. and others, she decided that a father-daughter dance would be a nice thing to include. Fast forward to the reception and the time of the dance. It was quite emotional and my usually emotionally-contained husband fell apart. A father’s love was present.
Two weeks later, that same daughter and her husband Andrew had a wedding reception in New York since Andrew’s parents live there. Sadly, Andrew’s father is undergoing treatment for pancreatic cancer and he was unable to attend the West Coast celebration. We were all moved when Andrew’s father gave a speech talking about his love for his son and how anticipating the wedding helped him find strength to undergo his treatments. A father’s love was again present.
Both of these examples show the power of a parent’s love. While I am aware that family relationships are sometimes complicated, when parental love is expressed within a family, it gives a glimpse into God’s unconditional love.
Where there is Love, there is God.
Darcy Wharton
Oct. 7, 2023- A Taste of What’s to Come
It used to be quite a treat to be able to lick the beaters when my mother would bake a cake. I’m not even sure I was thinking about the delicious cake that would be served later. It was enough to relish the privilege to partake in this “taste”. To this day, I always see if there is someone who might want to lick the beaters or scrape the bowl when I’m making a batch of cookies or a cake. If no one is around, I’ll enjoy it myself!
I was reflecting on how so many people enjoy doing this. We all seem to like to get a taste of what is to come. Even movie previews seem to take advantage of this strong desire within us.
What if I looked at receiving the Eucharist in the same way? Each time I receive, I am essentially getting a taste of the heavenly banquet…a reminder of what is and what is to come. Nothing could be sweeter than that!
Taste and see the goodness of the Lord- Psalm 34:8
Darcy Wharton
Oct. 8, 2023- The Gift of Faith
I consider the gift of faith to be the most precious gift that was given to me by my parents. I was one of those children who thoroughly enjoyed my CCD (now called Faith Formation) classes. Since I enjoyed them, I never felt “forced” to attend. I looked forward to going each week and later, even tried to start a bible study for high schoolers. None of my peers were interested, however. I learned at that point that although the opportunity to grow in faith is available to all, only some will accept the gift.
In today’s gospel, Jesus tells a parable of ungrateful wine stewards who refuse to share their good fortune with the landowner who employed them. They went so far as to kill the servants sent by the landowner. As a final step, the stewards were even willing to kill the owner’s son. Jesus has some harsh words to say about those who do not accept his kingdom. But the last line of this parable seems to say it all: the kingdom of God will be given to a people that will produce its fruit.
The way I understand this, it means that the kingdom of God resides in those who accept the gift and who maintain a relationship with God. I am not forced to accept this gift, but I cannot imagine my life without it.
Thank you to all the people in my life who have passed along the light of faith! Darcy Wharton
I can only wonder whether St. Patrick would be amused at some of the St. Patrick’s Day customs we celebrate in the U.S. St. Patrick probably liked to celebrate, but might wish we enhance our remembrance of his day with a few spiritual practices. “Prayer, scripture and evangelization were real hallmarks of his life.” (from Miracles of the Saints).
St. Patrick, known as the Apostle to Ireland, prepared 21 years for his mission in Ireland. He acquired practical wisdom needed to teach the Gospel of Christ. Legend has it that he used 3-leaf shamrocks to teach the Trinity.
In his writings, St. Patrick admitted to spiritual apathy, losing some of the Spirit’s fervor within him from his more youthful days. St. Patrick can be a hopeful sign to all of us who feel some of our youthful passion has cooled.
St. Patrick employed miracles over the magic of druids (pagan priests who dominated the Irish with their magic) to convert the Irish. In 12 years, Ireland had been converted from paganism to Christianity. Not bad for a few miracles.
Bob Leathers
March 18, 2023—The Annunciation
I keep an icon of the Annunciation of the Lord to Mary by the Archangel Gabriel on the wall in my home where I usually pray. In a few days, March 25th to be exact, we pause during Lent to celebrate this feast. (Apologies if I’m stealing next week’s meditation for this feast day)!
The gospel reading on the Annunciation (St. Luke’s gospel) has taught me to expect the unexpected and unforeseen circumstances in my plans. If I expect them to unfold as I want them to, then I’ll be frustrated because they will rarely happen the way I want them to. I sometimes wonder if the problems in life are disguises for the entertainment that God gives us! In some little ways, this Lent has taught me to trust the reality created by God more than my plans. The most unforeseen event is that Christ was born as a human being and that he is made real in the Eucharist.
Bob Leathers
March 19, 2023—Solemnity of St. Joseph
Sunday always trumps a saint’s feast day, even St. Joseph. So this year, we celebrate his feast tomorrow.
When I made my Confirmation (back then, in the 4th grade), I selected Joseph as my patron. I still have the statue given me as a gift.
Matthew’s gospel tells us that Joseph was a just man, one who was completely open to all God wanted for him. But Joseph was in a pickle because he found, Mary, his betrothed, pregnant. According to the law, it was his right to expose her for this adulterous act. But enlightened by an angel, Joseph sees that the only way to preserve Mary’s honor would be to bring Mary into his home and adopt the child as his own. He shifts his focus away from his rights and shows empathy to Mary. Later in Matthew’s gospel, Jesus teaches that one must go beyond what the law requires in order to truly fulfill it.
God’s plan surprises constantly if I allow myself to be surprised. To do this, I need the ability to hear the voice of our empathetic God, something difficult to do with all the demands on our time. When I pause to listen attentively I can create the space for God to be with me. The same challenges and frustrations are still there, but God is with me—and walks with me to help, guide and bear them. And perhaps this is the biggest surprise of all!
Happy Feast Day!
Bob Leathers
Reflections for Mar. 6-12, 2023
March 6, 2023 - Asking for Forgiveness
A Facebook friend of mine was recently diagnosed with Esophogeal Cancer Adrinocarcinoma and had to have an emergency c-section with her 8th child to remove the tumor larger than the baby and another tumor in her bowel tract. Upon removing the tumor and further review, she received the tragic news of a terminal diagnosis with less than 6 months to live. She has been quite “vocal” on Facebook asking for prayers and intentions. As I watch her move through the stages of grief and dying, I am reminded of the stage of “seeking mercy”. She boldly reached out to anyone she may have offended, or caused any harsh feelings in, or whomever she may have been a bad example to – she asked for their forgiveness and mercy. Typically, when I seek forgiveness, it is for the bigger of the sins as outlined in the 10 commandments. I was struck by her need to get into the most minuscule details of her life such as causing scandalous thoughts, being a bad example, encouraging another to sin through word or action, etc. It made me realize that seeking mercy is necessary not just in the big things but even in the simple areas that I can rationalize away; after all I am not in control of another’s reactions or sin. Her complete submission to God’s will during her life is an inspiration to me and I pray for her continued strength in mind, body, and soul. May I too seek mercy in the ways Sarah has inspired me. Bianca Hennager
March 7, 2023 - Being My Own Cheerleader
In reviewing today’s readings, I can relate to the Pharisees. Who doesn’t like a little praise and validation and honor bestowed upon them from other people? In the case of the Pharisees, they thought they were doing everything right. I struggle with this sentiment and recognize that I might react this when I am looking for validation of a job well done. How disappointed I become when I’m not recognized in the ways or in the timeframe I had expected! I am working on an internal dialogue that I have with myself when I reach a goal or an accomplishment. I make it part of my dialogue with God to turn inward versus outward. I thank God for giving me the strength, the patience and/or the ability to complete my goals. In becoming my own cheerleader and not looking outward for validation, I have become more content and joy filled. To be my own cheerleader doesn’t mean everything is perfect or that I don’t like to hear words of affirmation. Those things are still great, but they are not longer expected. I am learning to lessen the negative dialogue in my head and see the beauty of speaking kindness to myself. Bianca Hennager
March 8, 2023 - In Service to Others
Recently I was talking to my oldest son, a freshman in college, as he was explaining that he was at a transitional place in his life and did not have a lot of “joy.” Of course my mother’s heart wants only the best for him and to hear him struggling in his current phase of life was difficult. When discussing with him what may be at the root at his lack of joy, it became increasingly obvious to me that he wasn’t doing anything to bring joy into his life. He has a solid routine of classes, work, surface level encounters with acquaintances, and going to the gym. All these things are great things to do to lead a structured routine life, but there wasn’t anything pulling him towards being in service to someone or something else. Often when I am emotionally in a rut or feeling “joyless” I find that it is because I am too focused on myself, my surroundings, my life, etc. I explained that not all of us can go far away and live a missionary life of service. I imagine if someone can do that, they have a lot of joy amidst the trials of living in a different culture and seeing how other people in the world live. But there are smaller ways we can be of service.
Together my son and I brainstormed some ideas on how he can be in service to others whether it is in college or within the community where he lives. He is a great musician and basketball player. I explained he could teach guitar or coach a kids’ basketball team. When we serve others, it helps us gain perspective and allow joy to come into our lives. Seeing another person smile or laugh because of how we are in service to them is the best joy there is. Bianca Hennager
March 9, 2023 - A Dog’s Life
A little more than a year ago we adopted a stray dog that a friend of mine found at the local landfill. This beautiful German Shepherd puppy was almost 1 year old and had been out on her own for a while. You could see her ribs and she had a “scrapper’s” personality. You could tell she was used to scavenging for her food and the comfort of living indoors was not something she was used to. I immediately connected with her, and we brought her back to our busy house. At times this new puppy of ours was draining in her incessant need to be loved on, fed, and played with. When working from home she became quite a distraction for me, joining zoom calls at the most inopportune time because she wanted to play ball or to give kisses. I often had to put her outside of my room and shut the door on her. She didn’t hide her sad face and her loud sigh as she slumped right outside my door. Wailing would occur if the separation went on longer than she wanted.
When I meditated on today’s gospel I was reminded of how Lazarus begged like a dog; begging for scraps and or attention; begging to be noticed really. In contrast, I am reminded of how my puppy loves me unconditionally despite being put out or shunned when it’s inconvenient to pay attention to her. It made me wonder how many times have I consciously or unconsciously shunned other people because it was inconvenient, or I was too busy? Bianca Hennager
March 10, 2023 - Sibling Rivalry
In a large family there is bound to be some sibling rivalry. My two oldest sons are less than 13 months apart and are night and day in personality. One son is highly introverted, more cerebral and has a small cluster of friends; the other son is quite social, athletic, and dramatic. They complement each other so well and when they can work together, they can accomplish great feats. However due to the differences in their personalities, sibling rivalry sparks at times. One will say the other is favored and vice versa. As a parent I can appreciate the different gifts and talents God has bestowed on my children; however, my children can turn it into a competition. I try to intercede and explain that one sibling’s gift is not a deficit of the other – and that it is okay to have different gifts and talents. How blessed we are that we are not all the same – life would be quite boring!
I am reminded of sibling rivalry in the first reading today where the sons of Jacob were jealous of their brother Joseph and left him to be sold to the Ishmaelites. The extent of their jealousy and being insecure with the gifts they had must have been extensive. I pray for my children, that their relationship blossoms so that they can see the beauty in their differences and not feel jealousy and insecurity because of them. Bianca Hennager
March 11, 2023 - Forgiveness
In today’s Gospel of the Prodigal Son I am reminded of God’s unceasing mercy and unconditional love despite my actions. When I am truly repentant much like the younger son, God welcomes me back into his arms and metaphorically slaughters the fattened calf to celebrate my return. As I look back on my years as a young adult, there were plenty of times when I was arrogant in my beliefs, thinking I would be able to do things “better”, believing the famous saying: “when I become a parent I will do things differently” mantra. I was in my mid-twenties with small children when I had a kind of “ah-ha” moment with my mom. I remember apologizing to her for all the grief I had caused as a strong-willed child, my arrogance in believing I was doing things “better”, and my temper. She smiled and was quite loving in her response, recognizing that I was seeking forgiveness. Of course, she recognized right away that I too have strong willed children and I too would one day be in the position of the Father loving my children unconditionally when their arrogance and/or temper gets in the way. As my children become young adults, I can fully appreciate the unconditional love and joy a parent has when children come full circle recognizing and seeking that unceasing love from their parent. Bianca Hennager
March 12, 2023 - Helpless
A few years ago while in Monterey, someone stole my purse right in front me while I was talking to another individual. I remember hearing the car alarm sound, visually seeing the car, and not thinking much of it. Towards the end of the day when we were packing up, I couldn’t find my purse. I panicked and was sure it was stolen. My heart sank and I felt so helpless in that moment. I had no money for gas or food. How was I to get home? How was I to handle all the responsibilities of getting a new driver’s license, contacting credit card companies, etc. It seemed so overwhelming and there was my son looking to me for guidance; I was lost. I remember saying to the lead organizer, “How am I to get home? I feel so helpless.” Without even giving it a second thought, he took out his wallet and gave me $100. I was shocked and relieved as now I could focus on getting myself and my son home safely. The other items and responsibilities could wait for another day.
In retrospect, I now see God working so often through others and in nature when I feel helpless. Lord, I pray that when I feel helpless, I remember to look to you and know you are there. There is no need to feel helpless as you have sustained me yesterday, today, and will sustain me in the future. Bianca Hennager
Reflections for Feb. 27-March 5, 2023
February 27, 2023 - The 40 Day Challenge
There is a reoccurring theme throughout scripture that is hard to miss the more you read the bible. It is marked by the number 40, that signifies a time of challenge and hardship, followed by transformation. The example that immediately comes to mind is Jesus’ time in the dessert before he started his public ministry. During this time he was hungry, isolated, and tempted by the devil. Jesus knew that he was going to suffer and ultimately die and the human nature in him caused fear, doubt, and temptations that he knew he must face. The faith traditions he grew up in had stories of great men and prophets that had experienced these 40 days of challenges and preparation. And he knew that he must experience these things on his own.
This is what Lent is signaling for me to do every year in the context of our culture and challenges. During the 40 days, I am asked to reflect on what separates me from God. I can do this by abstaining from things that may be problematic in my life; maybe social media, alcohol, shopping, or any number of things that take me away from my faith and Him. But I can act against these things through service, penance, prayer, empathy, and compassion for others. By the end of the 40-day journey I can celebrate the resurrection, transformation and be fully ready for God in my life.
Jen Payan
February 28, 2023 - Heaven
Recently a nurse friend of mine shared a sweet interaction that she had with her young daughter. She had arrived home after a difficult day at work in which one of her patients, a very sick infant, had passed away. She was sad but was open with her daughter, explaining that her tiny patient had died, trying to explain that very tragic things happen, but that she takes comfort knowing that the infant was with God now and no longer suffering. Her daughter contemplated this for a moment and said, “I bet Grandma is going to love holding that little baby and taking care of her in heaven.” My friend’s heart burst with the thought of her mother in law, who had passed a few years back, snuggling and enjoying the beautiful newborn. Her daughter brought her much comfort with this thought and also reminded her of what eternal life with Christ offers us. Heaven is where we are with our God and there is no pain or suffering, only peace, comfort and joy. This is something that children seem to have no problem understanding, thank goodness they are around to remind us!
Jen Payan
March 1, 2023 - Your Happy Place
Have you thought recently about where your happy place is? I know when my children were small the answer was simply the bathroom where I could get a solid 5 minutes to myself! On a more serious note, asking that question really helps me reflect on what brings true contentment. A happy place can be a location or an activity. For example, if you said the beach, why? Is it the sun, the sound of the waves, children’s laughter, or just a break from daily routines that bring you peace and happiness? Maybe it is your kitchen where you enjoy cooking. Are you enjoying the smell and tastes of the food or providing a nice treat for those around you? Is it the gym, fishing on a lake, sitting in a coffee shop reading a book, walking with a friend?
We each have individual needs, interests, and things that bring us joy. I think it is important to reflect on this. The outside influences of the world often try to tell us what our happy place should be, for example, expensive vacations and material goods. But when I reflect on my true happy place I often find it simple, involving my own gifts, interests and the special people in my life. God’s gift to me is that “happy place.”
Jen Payan
March 2, 2023 - Waiting in Anticipation
Over the holiday I found myself in the baggage claim at the airport waiting for my college daughter to arrive. My eyes were glued to the escalator looking for her familiar smile, wearing her favorite travel sweatpants, college hoodie, and backpack. Since it was the holiday season, I noticed many others waiting for their loved ones in anticipation. There was a man with two little girls holding flowers and there was a group of teens with their moms’ holding signs with messages and hearts drawn on them. There was a man with a cowboy hat in muddy boots and a middle-aged couple holding a fuzzy pink baby blanket. I started trying to picture who each group was anticipating. Since my daughter was delayed after the landing, I was able to witness each reunion. They welcomed their mom, cousin, son and grandbaby with hugs and such joy! It was so fun to watch.
Isn’t this how God must feel waiting for us? Especially when we have been away for a while? For those of us who may think we have been away too long or may not be worthy of his love, I’m reminded of those reunions I witnessed that evening. I know my heart burst with joy when I finally spotted her coming down the escalator. I’m sure God will have a similar response to our return!
Jen Payan
March 3, 2023 - Out of Gas
My legs and arms were shaking, and sweat was dripping into a pool underneath me. That’s it, I thought, I’m done, I can’t hang on any longer, I’m out of gas. Then I heard voices of encouragement around me. “you got this Jen” and “you are looking strong!” My gym buddies surrounded me. Really, I look strong? Maybe I can hold on a little longer. I ended up accomplishing more that I ever thought I could with the support of some very special people.
How many times have you run out of gas, whether it was physically, spiritually, or mentally? You simply lose the energy to keep moving forward. Then someone comes along, lifts you up and helps you find your own strength. I need to treasure those who provide that support in my life and reflect on how I can play that role in others’ lives as well. It is one of the greatest gifts we can give each other and a direct reflection of what our God does for us every day.
Jen Payan
March 4, 2023 - Right Place Right Time
Many years ago, I walked my daughter to a neighbor’s house for a play date. We arrived at a chaotic scene. Her friend’s grandfather waved us in quickly and said they needed help. Her mother held the little 4-year-old brother on the couch. He was limp, dusky colored, and not breathing. The mother was paralyzed with fear and didn’t know what to do. I quickly took the little boy, laid him on the floor and opened his airway. He took a few shallow breathes while I checked his pulse. I reassured mom and grandpa that he was starting to breathe again and had a good heart rate. By the time the ambulance arrived, his color had improved and he was starting to wake up. We assumed it was a seizure. They accompanied him to the hospital while I watched the shaken little girls.
The following day the family showed up on my doorstep with an angel necklace to thank me. I was very touched. I hadn’t saved his life; I just had provided comfort and reassurance during a very scary event. Not only had God put me in the right place at the right time, but he also knew how my strengths were going to help that family. I try to remember this when people come into my life during difficult times. They have been chosen by God, who knows the gifts and talents they possess that will help me. He will always send an “angel” at the right time to support me.
Jen Payan
March 5, 2023 - God’s Choice
When we were in the market for a new home for our growing family, we had so much coming at us. We were searching for the house, neighborhood, and schools that my children would be growing up in. It was overwhelming, I prayed we would find the perfect fit. After many offers, we were finally able to go into contract with a home I fell in love with. I was even measuring rooms for furniture when something went wrong, and the contract was cancelled. I prayed for resolution to the problem so we could have that home, but it never happened.
Shortly after that, a home came on the market that fit all our needs. Our offer was accepted, and the transaction went smoothly. On move in day we were greeted by friendly neighbors that became close friends. Our kids played in the cul-de-sac while we had impromptu potluck dinners on our front lawn. We shared childcare and carpools. Our neighborhood was our little “village” for the next 15 years as our children grew. It was the perfect fit.
I believe God chose that neighborhood for us. I’ve taken this experience with me. Now when things seem not to be going my way or my family faces disappointments, I truly believe in putting it in God’s hands. I try to pray not for what I want but for what God thinks is best for me. He always gets it right.
Jen Payan
Reflections for Feb. 20-26, 2023
February 20, 2022 - Lent: from Feast to Fast
We are about to embark on a spiritual journey that prepares us for the greatest of all Christian celebrations: Easter. I remember from the days of my childhood the tenets of Lent. You had to give up something that meant something to you such as no-meat Fridays, no movies, no celebrations, etc. In short, it was a time to abstain from all things fun and tasty. Also, there were ashes on your forehead, confessions, and purple cloth covering every statue in church. It was later in life that I learned of the significance of these rituals and the deeper meaning behind them. And it was years before I immersed myself in the true spirit of what Lent was all about. Of course, repentance was the most important part, but it was also a time of looking forward. It was a time of really listening to, and putting into practice the teachings of our religion. Lent, to me, is a time of great personal awakening and inner conversions of the heart. Instead of giving something up, Lent, became a time of giving of yourself to help others. Instead of walking around in sackcloth and ashes, you became a beacon of light, helping others by your actions. And internally, you dove into renewing our baptismal commitment and bringing yourself closer to God.
Lent marks the beginnings of Jesus’ ministry. 40 Days in the desert, resistance to the temptations of the devil, and embarkation on a ministry that would change the world, and culminate in an Easter that would put a conclusion to the old, and fulfillment in the new.
Don Eagle
February 21, 2022 - Shrove Tuesday — Mardi Gras
Shrove Tuesday. Mardi Gras. Carnival. All words associated with the beginnings of Lent. Shrove Tuesday is from the old English term “shrive,” which means to hear one’s confession and declare freedom from sin. It was a term that was the kickoff to Lent, and became known as Shrove Tuesday, or the day before Ash Wednesday— a day of atonement. Mardi Gras (French) or “Fat Tuesday” referred to the culmination of feasting before the fast, abstinence and penitence of Lent. Carnival (Latin— from the word carnivore) ) was the putting away of flesh (eating meat) as part of an annual celebration involving parades, music, and festivity. Ash Wednesday became a sign of the whole church putting itself through penance as symbolized by the placing of ashes upon the head, an Old Testament sign of grief and mourning. It marks the beginning of the Lenten season, 40 days dedicated to reflection, prayer and fasting ahead of Easter.
I liken the soul to a tree in autumn. I think of Lent as turning over a new leaf each day during the 40 days prior to Easter. I have often thought of a tree of such leaves —purple on one side, white on the other, and of turning over one leaf each day during Lent.
“As each of the days of lent unfolds towards the promise of Easter, we are challenged to turn over a new leaf in our lives through positive Christian actions. And as our leaves are turned each day, we carry out the commandment to love one another. So at Easter, our souls, as well as our tree, will welcome the Resurrection clothed in dazzling white.”
Don Eagle
February 22, 2022 – Ash Wednesday
I have two favorite poems: the first, by Christina Rosetti, gives a beautiful description of the wind, which to me, is interchangeable with a description of the Holy Spirit.
“Who has seen the wind?
Neither you nor I.
But when the trees bow down their heads,
The wind is passing by.”
The second, by David Melton, speaks to a generational love between parent and child.
“Take my hand, my child
and we will explore the land.
I will tell you all that I know
and you will show me the secrets of the heart.
It may not be a fair exchange,
but it Is all that I have to give.”
As we embark upon the 40 days of Lent, I am reminded of Jesus’ 40 days in the desert prior to his ministry, the wanderings of the Israelites for 40 years before the arrival at the promised land, and the 40 days that Jonah spent among the Ninevites speaking repentance. Our church today invites us to fast, to abstain, to turn over a new leaf in anticipation of Easter, and the promise of redemption and eternal life. I have been through many, many Lenten seasons (I won’t say HOW many), and early on gave up candy and movies in order to make some sacrifice regarding Lent. Today, I find it in my heart not so much to give up, as to get up and perform positive acts. Get up and embrace the Holy Spirit, and proclaim acts of kindness, grace, mercy and humility.
Don Eagle
February 23, 2022 - Modern Day Saints
Somehow I think that the feast of All Saints is misplaced. From the obscure placement on our church calendar in November, I think it might be beneficial to honor those saints during Lent. In professing their faith, many of them died as martyrs. In performing outstanding service to the tenets of our faith, they served humanity. Lent is a time of spiritual reflection.
According to the Delaney Dictionary of Saints there are approximately five thousand such men, women and children who have — in the eyes of the church — become holy. Whether it is St. Francis of Assisi, St. Teresa of Avila, or St. Teresa of Calcutta there are saints who have become recognized as patrons of every sport, job, or even country. The pages of history spell out the lives of ordinary people who have given of themselves in order to live out their faith to help their fellow creatures.
To me, there ought to be a connection between Lent and the examples of the saints. For it is in study that we learn of faith. And who better to explain faith than a Saint? What better time to immerse oneself in the lives of practitioners of the faith? Who better to follow the example of holy actions than someone who has done exactly that?
I think I’ll find me a nice quiet place and each day examine the lives of a few saints and see how these normal people professed their faith. It should be a nice adjunct to fasting and abstinence.
Hmmm. Perhaps I’ll start with Brendan, Patron Saint of sailors.
Don Eagle
February 24, 2022 - Benedict XVI
At the end of 2022, we lost Pope Benedict the Sixteenth. To Catholics everywhere, the passing of Benedict the sixteenth was expected yet sad. Before becoming Pope in 2005, Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger of Germany rose through Vatican offices to become a trusted right-hand of Pope John Paul II, and was considered to be a conservative. His mission was to keep the church on goal with basic teachings. His shyness and subsequent pastoral visits limited him to few travels, Yet he was a popular pontiff. His greatest contribution was his magisterium (teaching authority of the Church.) His catechesis, encyclicals on central aspects of the faith and biographies on Jesus of Nazareth were exceptional. He handled his office skillfully, but as he grew older he summoned the courage to retire, an action that was unheard of for over 600 years. Benedict realized the need for a younger Pope who could handle the many and complicated issues facing the modern world. As he retired he took the title of Pope Emeritus and lived within the Vatican. He was highly intellectual, and authored several books. His funeral drew some fifty thousand people, and, with the tools of modern communication we were able to witness his burial in the vaults beneath St. Peter’s. It was a solemn and fitting closure to his reign. His intellect and influence shall continue to be felt as he will likely be remembered as one of history’s great popes.
Though this reflection is not about a personal spiritual reflection, it is in my heart to salute a great Pope with the words “Requescat in Pace”
Don Eagle
February 25, 2022. - Walking the Walk
A few weeks ago my wife and I attended the Parish Mission. There were certainly a lot of take-aways from the talks given by Fr. Brendan, but one term kept coming back to me, and that was “pivot point.” I believe that all of us have multiple pivot points in our lives, most of them occurring in our adulthood. Marriage, jobs, children, school, extraordinary epiphanies, and on and on. These pivot points indicate a change in direction. Many of our parishioners have experienced their own personal pivot points in the epiphanies experienced through the Cursillo movement. Others have had their own pivot points through programs, experiences, and ministries offered through SS. Peter & Paul. A particular pivot point for me was the Cursillo. It made me aware of walking with Christ in the company of similarly-minded men and women looking for spiritual awakening and direction. For them and for me, this pivot point became a life changer, or as most Cursillistas put it “and nothing was ever the same.” The experience was at once profound and awakening. The same can be said about other ministries as well. For it is in helping others, study, involvement through action, and a deeper understanding of our faith that we indeed begin the walk with Christ.
Don Eagle
February 26, 2022 - The Start of a Grand Adventure
Seems like the seasons roll around more and more swiftly. Just yesterday we were celebrating Christmas, then comes February and Lent. In a mere 40 days Easter will be upon us. Then Ascension, then Pentecost then Advent and voila — it ’s Christmas again!
The clock ticks, the days pass, and generation succeeds generation.
For some reason I thought of my maternal grandfather. I never met him or my paternal grandfather either, for that matter. The former passed away when I was one. The latter died before I was born. My maternal grandfather was full blooded Irish and he left a religious legacy that has continued to this day. I felt his spirituality and his religious commitment though I never met him. He was an influencer that left me feeling that I knew him. He was always there — in our prayers, in our hearts, and in our minds. He left behind a sense of spiritual guidance for his family, a closeness to his faith.
He left behind two things which I have today: His pocket watch and a two volume set on the Manual of the Roman Catholic Church, circa 1906. The books are especially interesting because you can see the differences between pre and the post Vatican II. The front page of volume one contains his signature —beautifully written in ink — when people knew how to write in script. Once in a while I’ll return to that front page just to remind me of my heritage, and the grandpa that was so influential in my own religious education.
Don Eagle
Reflections for Feb. 13-19, 2023
February 13, 2023 - Are You the One?
I wondered recently how I would answer the disciples of John the Baptist who go to Jesus and ask,” Are you the one who is to come, or should we look for another?” Jesus’ answer is Matthew 11:2-11. “Go and tell John what you hear and see: the blind regain their sight, the lame walk, lepers are cleansed, the deaf hear, the dead are raised and the poor have the good news proclaimed to them.” I have wondered what I would say now in 2023 about whether Jesus was the one who was to come. When I write a reflection about my life and something I have done or experienced I write because I believe that somewhere in those experiences Jesus has been present.
In my life you will not find the deaf hearing or the blind seeing, or lepers cleansed. You may find an auto accident avoided, a medical problem stabilized, or an infant and mother brought safely from danger. You might find a newly minted Catholic slightly more confident in their faith or simply a non-believer better informed. The message Jesus gave to John’s disciples is the same message I must deliver when anyone comes and asks if Jesus is the one. There is nothing more genuine, nothing more transformative, nothing more powerful than our own experience of God. Begin by asking yourself as I have, “Where do I most experience God? In what circumstance do I feel the undeniable presence of our Lord.
Ray Frink
February 14, 2023 - His Voice
I wish I could have heard Jesus’ voice. It is part of Jesuit spiritual tradition, when reflecting on scripture, to place oneself in the scene described. I might be a disciple, a Jewish bystander or the person being healed, even a dispassionate Roman observer. The goal is to fully appreciate how I might feel or react in the circumstances of Jesus life and respond to His teachings. If I were there, if I heard Jesus’ voice, how might my life have been transformed?
When I think about the New Testament passages I have heard, I hear in my mind the voice of Fr. McCauley from the UCLA Newman Center. I hear the gentle Irish lilt of Fr. Dillion, the warmth of Fr. Bony and Deacons David and Bob; the energy and insights of Fr. Mike Ritter and the expository sermons of Bishop Barron. I hear the priests, brothers, and lay voices on the Laudate app. When I reflect on the New Testament, I hear Erin, Janet, Cass, Mike, Rosa, Jeff, Shelley, and all the other lectors, past and present, of the 5 o’clock Sunday Mass. In today’s media world, I hear the portrayal of Jesus by Jonathan Roumie in the recreation of Jesus‘ life, ‘The Chosen’.
These many voices have placed me in the scene with Jesus. Each voice, with its unique qualities, is a different path to hearing the transformative words of Jesus’ life. I wish I could have heard Jesus’ voice. Perhaps I already have. Thank you.
Ray Frink
February 15, 2023 - Touch
I wondered recently how I would answer the disciples of John the Baptist who go to Jesus and ask,” Are you the one who is to come, or should we look for another?” Jesus’ answer is Matthew 11:2-11. “Go and tell John what you hear and see: the blind regain their sight, the lame walk, lepers are cleansed, the deaf hear, the dead are raised and the poor have the good news proclaimed to them.” I have wondered what I would say now in 2023 about whether Jesus was the one who was to come. When I write a reflection about my life and something I have done or experienced I write because I believe that somewhere in those experiences Jesus has been present.
In my life you will not find the deaf hearing or the blind seeing, or lepers cleansed. You may find an auto accident avoided, a medical problem stabilized, or an infant and mother brought safely from danger. You might find a newly minted Catholic slightly more confident in their faith or simply a non-believer better informed. The message Jesus gave to John’s disciples is the same message I must deliver when anyone comes and asks if Jesus is the one. There is nothing more genuine, nothing more transformative, nothing more powerful than our own experience of God. Begin by asking yourself as I have, “Where do I most experience God? In what circumstance do I feel the undeniable presence of our Lord.
Ray Frink
February 16, 2023 - 51%
My wife and I have been blessed with a quality marriage for 43 years. We reflected on this and realized that when we have disagreements, we both begin with the assumption that the other person might be right. We did this instinctively at first and now do so intentionally. We begin with trying to understand the others position and move from there. I call this the 51% approach. At the start, the other person is 51% correct. The outcome is usually the best solution. This approach relies on holding the others and the family’s best interest over our own. Our solution is most often a combination of both ideas. This is not compromise where each loses something. It is the win-win solution.
This idea of putting the other first and considering their position can be and has been criticized both on a personal and public level as a sign of weakness. If I believe in my position, why should I grant the ‘opposition’ any footing? The popular assumption is that I must prove the other wrong. I have to win my point. I must soundly defeat the other.
My wife and I both view our lives from a position of strength. We are and have for all time been loved by God. We are His Beloved. When I am loved for who I am, with mercy, forgiveness, and grace as God loves me, then I surrender nothing in the 51% approach and I grow stronger as a member of the Body of Christ.
Ray Frink
February 17, 2023 - Outsized Hearts
My two sons’ lives, though stable and rewarding now, have had rocky paths with bumps and stumbles. There are choices they have made where I may have chosen differently. They do not practice their faith in the same way I do. I hope and know that they turn to prayer and the sacraments during some of their darkest times. I pray, as any parent does, that they will recognize that the grace of God is always there, Jesus is always beside them and the Holy Spirit is in their lives at all times. Being one of their parents, I naturally wonder if I could have helped raise them differently and presumably “better”.
One aspect about which I do not wonder is what I call their “outsized hearts”. This is a comment on them as persons. They are kind, generous, and compassionate. They have a strong sense of mercy and justice. They have taken the time, given the opportunity, to hear the gospel of Jesus to feed the hungry, clothe the naked, give drink to the thirsty, and shelter the homeless. This may take the form of defending a friend from a bully, protecting the inebriated from harm, housing the rejected, or just being good listeners. These events tell me they are listening to their hearts. Jesus gave them the commandment to “love your neighbor as yourself”. When asked, “Who is my neighbor?” Jesus’ answer was “everyone”. My sons have heard this and I am proud.
Ray Frink
February 18, 2023 - Hope
We pray each Sunday in the Creed, “I believe in one, holy, catholic, and apostolic Church”. That is a tall order given the condition of the world and the Church today. I need some hope.
I am a cradle Catholic. I was born into a Catholic family, baptized as an infant, and received the sacraments of initiation as a child. I have been taught by and/or worked with nuns and priests from 1st grade through graduate school. I am also trained as a scientist, having had two careers that involved rational, logical thinking, powered by observation, data collection, conclusions, and testing.
So where do I find hope? I was influenced in my religious education by a French priest who lived from 1881 to 1955, Pierre Teilhard de Chardin. Teilhard was a paleontologist, geologist, and theologian. Those who influenced his writing were Paul the Apostle and Ignatius of Loyola. He wanted to bring science and faith together for all of God’s children. He was controversial during his life and after. He is now embraced by the Church and quoted by Popes Benedict and Francis in their writings. He wrote that man is evolving spiritually and socially toward a more Christ like state. His writing gives me hope that not only can we all strive along this path, but also that the natural movement of our world, despite what we see, is to move toward Christ. Teilhard said: You are a spiritual being immersed in a human experience.
Ray Frink
February 19, 2023 - Who Knows?
I have mentioned previously that the vows we used at our wedding were quoted from the Book of Ruth. This book is rich in expressions of devotion, caring, mercy, and love. You also know that as an OB/Gyn, I was involved in many births. I have no knowledge of who those infants became. I always prayed that if I gave them a good start from birth, that somehow, I helped them begin a good life.
In the Book of Ruth, we learn that Ruth the Moabite left her family and people and followed her mother-in-law to the land of the Hebrews. She expected to be treated as an outsider. In contrast to her expectations, her devotion and caring brought the notice of Boaz and with it, mercy and love. She married Boaz and they had a son, Obed who was the grandfather of King David.
Who knew that the devotion and caring of Ruth would ultimately bring about the birth of the King David? Who knew that the long line of descendants of King David would be the one God chose to reveal His divine son and our savior?
On the worst days as a physician and scientist, besides the sustaining love I have received throughout my life, one thought has helped keep me going. That thought was simply: Who knows what good will come of an apparently insignificant act of service or goodness that I commit today? God knows and someday He may reveal it to me.
Ray Frink
Reflections for Feb. 6-12, 2023
February 6, 2023 - Answering God’s Call: Everyone has Gifts
I wonder how often we are prevented from doing something because we doubt our own gifts... I listen to an invitation to serve or a call for help and assume someone else is better suited, more skilled, or someone else will step up. Seldom do I think, this is God calling me. Or, my community needs me, or “speak Lord your servant is listening.” I wonder what our community would be like if we all listened more carefully to God’s call.
I think I tend to think about charisms and gifts from God too narrowly. Perhaps we all think they are reserved for a special set of people—saints, but not us. I wonder if one of the greatest sins is the denial of living out who we are created to be, God's presence in me. I also think sometimes I fail to understand that God uses community, more than individuals, to do God's work. It is not about what I can do alone, but what we can do together. I do not need to save the world alone, but I do need to participate in my small piece of ushering in the Kingdom! May we listen carefully, like Samuel, to the voice of God calling us to discipleship and respond like he did, “Here I am Lord, your servant is listening.”
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio
February 7, 2023 - Answering God’s Call: Excuses We Make
I have thousands of them! They range from “I really don't have time” to “I'm not sure I agree with the philosophy of that group...” They also expose my insecurities, “I don't have that skill set” (although I've always been interested in learning about X). I am a master of excuses. “I have so many other commitments, where would I find the time?” I realize for myself, that it takes a concerted effort to evaluate my priorities. It’s not about what I say no to, it’s about being clear about what I say yes to. My yeses should reflect who I truly am and reflect my deepest values—my faith. I try to do a review once a year—to look at where I'm spending my time, talent and treasure, and to ask myself, does it reflect my sense of my authentic self? In other words, does it reflect my understanding of what I believe God has gifted me to do? Is it in alignment with serving the Kingdom of God? Am I being the creation I have the potential to be? When I am clear about what I say yes to, I don’t need excuses. My life feels centered and in flow with God’s work in me and in the world. I am comfortable with what is mine to do, and I trust that others will also answer God’s call in them so all our small efforts will play a significant role in building up our parish community and influencing the world for the better.
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio
February 8, 2023 - Answering God’s Call: Living Faith as Prayer and Action
Over the years I have really valued how Richard Rohr describes the foundation of his work at the Center for Action and Contemplation. Paraphrased, he says we need both prayer/contemplative practice and compassionate action for the spiritual journey. “Without action, our spirituality becomes lifeless and bears no authentic fruit. Without contemplation, all our doing comes from ego, even if it looks selfless, and it can cause more harm than good.” I find that my spiritual life and my prayer open me to God’s transforming work in me, and it is in the world that I express God’s love and transforming power through action and service. The service, in turn, challenges me to deepening prayer.
As we focus as a parish on our individual calls to service in ministry, I ask myself where is there need in our faith community? How do our parish ministries serve the larger community with it’s needs? What is mine to do? Another quote I love says, “Beware the faith that does not trouble the world.” Jesus challenges me to consider, how do I participate in service to God’s people, God’s creation, God’s transforming work in the world? What is God calling me to do, and what ministries can I explore and commit to in the weeks and months to come? What stirs my heart to action?
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio
February 9, 2023 - Answering God’s Call: Who me?
I love the stories of Jesus calling his disciples or the scriptures about God calling the prophets. Those who are called are such a scruffy bunch—fishermen, shepherds, salt of the earth types; some are adulterers, tax collectors who work for the Roman Empire, or traitors who persecute the early Christians... not at all my image of “faithful and holy.” They are an unworthy and uninspiring bunch. Yay! I can relate to them… And more importantly, God doesn’t seem to judge and choose by my standards.
Flannery O’Connor has a beautiful story called Revelation In which the protagonist, Mrs. Turpin, a very self-righteous Christian, has a dream of heaven. In her dream, it is the sinner, the broken, the ugly, the lost, that make up a makeshift band of people singing off key as they march through the pearly gates and enter heaven. At the back of the line are the righteous, well-dressed Christians singing on key. What great imagery of God's unconditional love for all of us! When I reflect on this story, I think, who am I to not answer the call to serve in my unworthiness? What could be more grace-filled? Who me? YES, YOU!
February 10, 2023 - Answering God’s Call: Living as a Parish Family
One of the many things that drew my husband and me to Saints Peter and Paul was seeing the involvement of so many parishioners in various ministries. It has been my experience that this is one of the best indicators of a vibrant, faith-filled parish. Some of the ways Vince and I have discerned how to be involved in parish life include asking ourselves, how might our unique skills and experiences be helpful to this parish community? I’ve found it equally important to ask myself, what will bring me joy? Where might I learn something new? How might God be inviting me to grow? Who should I get to know better to appreciate the rich diversity of our family—a different age group, a ministry to a particular life-stage or need, or a particular social issue? Where am I being invited to expand my understanding and compassion for my neighbor? In spiritual direction there is a tool I sometimes use that invites people to make a life map—a simple review of key areas of life. We can look at balance and find areas where we have not had the ability or commitment to spend time developing particular parts of our lives. For example, what might I want to do to enrich my spiritual life? Or my commitment to serve my community? Do I feel the need to build relationships with people who support my faith? Where is my life out of balance? Are there commitments that take a lot of my time but don’t produce fruit?
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio
February 11, 2023 - Answering God’s Call: God Doesn’t Pigeon Hole Us
I think sometimes we get stuck in a rut in our parish ministry. We participate in a particular ministry for years, which is great, but we start to equate our identity with that ministry. Sometimes we relate so much with a particular ministry that it begins to look like ownership. A ministry can start to look like it belongs to a particular person or small group, and others are not welcome. We can also create our own barriers to participation by thinking a ministry belongs to others, and we are not needed or welcome. This doesn’t serve the ministry or our own spiritual growth.
Ministries grow and thrive when we have both long-term, committed individuals and new blood with new perspectives and ideas. Like Pope Francis’s call for us to be a synodal Church, it reminds me to trust that the Holy Spirit guides our discernment and our work. When I discern my call to service through prayer, I am often surprised by what surfaces as an invitation. God is constantly calling me to grow and explore talents and passions I didn’t know I had. God also invites me to loosen my grip when I start to feel too much ownership in a ministry, and I forget who is in charge.
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio
February 12, 2023 - Answering God’s Call: Who is My Neighbor?
We all know the parable about the Good Samaritan. For me, the moral of that story was that it is the person who takes action and cares for the victim who does God's will. While of course that is true, I've also come to ponder Jesus's choice of characters in the parable and wonder what else he might have meant. Jim Wallis wrote about this as well, and he points out that Samaritans were not “good” as far as the Judeans were concerned. They were despised foreigners, and nobody liked them. By making the Samaritan the hero in the parable, Jesus chooses the hated “other” as his example of who our neighbor is. Jesus’s parable of the Good Samaritan was meant not just to call people to service and self-sacrifice, but also to disrupt and challenge their concept of who their neighbors were and were not. Jesus challenges me with my sense of us and them. The test of who is my neighbor is about getting outside of my clubs and listening to the lives of the ones whose experiences may have been very different from mine, who Jesus defines as my neighbor. As we look at service as a parish, who is the neighbor in the world whom we have despised or passed by? Who needs to be welcomed into our ministries and our lives as God’s beloved?
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio
Reflections for Jan. 30- Feb. 5, 2023
January 30, 2023 - Catholic Schools Week
This week, students across the nation in Catholic schools are celebrating Catholic Schools Week, a 49-year tradition in the United States. My four years in Catholic high school were fundamental in my personal development, as it was there that I learned to recognize my dignity as a woman made in the image of God, and I was formed in social justice. It was in Catholic high school where I developed my love for spiritual formation and my passion for participating in the liturgy. I was unfamiliar with Catholic elementary school before my daughters attended, but we are happy with how faith and education have been integrated into one experience.
Catholic school is not the path for everyone—not even all Catholics—but this week, let us celebrate the Catholic schools across the country for the faith-filled education they are providing to students of all ages, races, and religious backgrounds. Let us pray that Catholic education will remain a part of our education system and that it will be accessible to all those who wish to attend.
Erin Gallawa
January 31, 2023 - Pages of God’s Word
I walked by a man with his newspaper laid out on the table before him and it occurred to me that I rarely see anyone reading a physical newspaper anymore. There was something very nostalgic about seeing him sit there with his paper. In 2023 everything is digital. We read the news, books, assembly instructions—everything!—on a digital device! Many people even skip the reading part and instead get their information in the form of video or podcast.
In the last few years there has been a lot of excitement over Fr. Mike Schmidt’s Bible in a Year podcast. I think it is a wonderful resource that brings the Bible to all people. There are all sorts of Catholic podcasts and apps and Instagram accounts! There are so many ways that we can stay connected to our faith. But when I saw the man reading the newspaper, I immediately thought of the Bible. When is the last time I pulled out a physical copy to read, instead of just going to the Catholic Bishops website to read the digital copy?
Our faith is founded on Scripture and Tradition—both are rooted in being physically present in the Mass and touching the pages of God’s word. May I find a way to always come back to the source!
Erin Gallawa
February 1, 2023 - Raising God’s Children
I do not like to fly. It makes me anxious and I am never at peace until we have safely landed at our destination. On a recent trip to Southern California, my daughter Grace took my hand without prompting and silently held on during takeoff and landing. When I asked her about it later, she said she knew those were the parts I was most scared of. What a beautiful moment to have her notice and respond with tender love.
There is something amazing about watching your children grow into themselves. As much as parents try to teach compassion and kindness, we can’t guarantee how our children will turn out. I think of God who sent us his only Son to teach us the greatest lessons about love and sacrifice, how He must hope that we will choose to follow in his path. But even God does not control what path his children will take. I like to think that when he sees us acting in a Christ-like way, that He too rejoices!
Erin Gallawa
February 2, 2023 - On Like a Light
I was recently struck when I heard the common idiom “out like a light.” While I understand it references the contrast between light and darkness, on and off, when I think about it, it feels like it should actually be “on like a light.” For is it still a light when it is off? When I think of light I think of Christ, and I do not think of Christ as ever being off. Christ is always on, always shining, always bright. Even when Jesus’ body lay in the tomb, his light was still shining from beyond the grave. The nature of light is that it makes things visible, so how can it be called light when it is turned off? Let us be on like a light, shining brightly for all to see!
Erin Gallawa
February 3, 2023 - The Silence of the Wind
In the last few weeks we have witnessed so many storms. As we sat inside our home I could hear the whistling of wind through the cracks in the doors, the rustle of the trees outside, the whipping of branches hitting the house. Wind is nothing but the movement of air, but for something I cannot see or touch, wind is a pretty powerful force! After many noisy nights, I woke up in darkness one night stunned by the silence that was left in the place where the wind had once been. I wonder if this is how it felt to the disciples of Christ when he left this earth. Although he did not come as the warrior king that the Jews expected, he moved strongly about this earth making an impact wherever he went. And then suddenly he was gone, leaving a silence in his place. But just because he was gone did not mean he no longer existed. Just because he could not be heard like the wind did not mean that his presence was gone. The air still surrounds us, even when it moves in quiet and subtle ways.
Erin Gallawa
February 4, 2023 - Windshield Wipers
There is such a satisfaction in windshield wipers. Obviously we need them from a safety perspective as they make it safe to drive. But I also love watching them for their rhythm and the simplicity of wiping away a blurred surface for a moment of clarity. When I am driving in heavy rain, I am often frustrated by how quickly the windshield becomes blurred, and then the wipers swipe across the glass for momentary relief.
I’ve met many people who don’t believe you need Church for a relationship with God. While it’s true that we do not need the Church to start a relationship with God, I believe we do need Mass and prayer and our community to keep that relationship in focus. I think of the windshield as my relationship with God and the rain as daily life. As I make my way through each day, the windshield becomes clouded by all the tasks, people and challenges that I encounter. When I attend Mass, engage with my community and pray, my blurry windshield is wiped clean and my relationship with God is suddenly clearer.
Erin Gallawa
February 5, 2023 - Wet Rocks
If you’ve ever walked near water or been outside after it rains, you’ve may have looked down to see a gorgeous, colorful rock. Perhaps you put the rock in your pocket or carried it around for a while, only to find later when it dried that it looked just like every other gray rock. I can’t tell you how many rocks I’ve picked up, only to discover later that it wasn’t what I remembered.
Wet rocks remind me a bit of being Catholic. After joyful seasons like Christmas or Easter, after transformational Sacraments, or after a particularly powerful Mass, I feel like the shiny beautiful rock. Perhaps others even see me that way from the outside! But as I move through daily life, I find that that shine starts to fade and maybe the brightness starts to dull. I am blessed that our Church invites us to keep polishing our rocks so that we can keep the shine! Through the movement of the calendar, the commitment to Mass, and participation in the Sacraments, I am always invited to be renewed and to find my beauty again. The rock doesn’t really change—it’s colors and patterns are always there, waiting to be restored.
Erin Gallawa
Reflections for Jan. 23-29, 2023
January 23, 20231- Details
Back in November our whole family, all 16 of us, went to Disneyland. No matter how many times I have been there the place never ceases to amaze me. You don’t feel like you are in an amusement park but in a completely different world. Disney creates such imagery that even the lines are tolerable because you have so much to look at. In the new Star Wars ride, I felt like I was actually in the movie. It made me reflect on our Catholic faith and how detailed it is. Going to Mass is also an experience for our senses. Hearing the scriptures and the songs reinforces the message being given. Praying the Our Father, the Creed, and singing the Psalms connects us all over the world to one another. Seeing the Stained glass, the Stations of the Cross, the way the church is decorated to match the meaning of the liturgical season helps to expand our understand of our faith. Smelling the incense, oils, flowers, and plants that are used during Easter and Christmas is special
Masses bring our worship to a visceral level. Feeling the touch of ourselves in making the sign of the cross or others at the sign of peace when we can have that human connection to one another. And tasting the body of Christ in the wafer and Blood of Christ in the wine nourishes our soul. Every aspect of myself is alive in the Mass but many times I do not notice it. But when I take the time, like I did in Disneyland, and am open to the experience, I find that I am in a different world. It is the world of God!
Kurt Peterson
January 24, 2023 - Caring
My mother-in-law is 92 and has some health issues. Recently she had to be admitted to the hospital. Because Kaiser did not have any rooms available, she was sent to Mercy San Juan. At Mercy they allow more than 1 visitor, so I was able to spend time with her there. I got to observe first-hand the nurses caring for her. I have always had a lot of respect for nurses, but I really got to experience how caring they are. I could tell that nursing isn’t just a career but a calling for them. The gentleness and compassion they not only showed her but also us was so appreciated. It is a very special job because they are helping people at their most vulnerable state. I know that it is not an easy job, and they can put in long hours and can get fatigued themselves, but I am so grateful for how they cared for my mother-in-law. For all of you who are thinking about becoming a nurse, it is one of the most needed professions out there. And for all of you that are nurses, we are blessed to have you there and what you do for our families is not unnoticed. Thank you for saying yes to this vocation and caring for the ones we love so much; you’ll never fully realize how much it means to us. You truly are Christ to others.
Kurt Peterson
January 25, 2023 - Spending time
One of the biggest social problems affecting the modern world is isolation, especially for those over 65 years of age. In the Netherlands almost 10% of the nation’s population of 17.8 million are over the age of 75. In 2019, Jumbo, a large Dutch supermarket, started a pilot program called Kletkassa (Chat Checkout). This is not a fast lane checkout, but a slow lane checkout. The purpose of the Kletkassa clerks is to spend time chatting with their customers as they ring up their groceries. For many of Jumbo’s customers, mainly the elderly, this may be their only outside contact. The program has been such a success that they have opened these slow lanes in 200 of their 700 stores and expect to have them in all 700 stores at some point. We live busy lives, and we are constantly on the move. From time to time I remind myself to stop moving on to the next thing and take the time to interact with others. When I do, not only do they feel better, I feel better too. We always see examples of Jesus speaking to the lonely, the hurting and the outcast. However, even Jesus got caught up in the hurriedness. In Mark 5:21-45 when Jesus was moving through the crowds trying to get past them, a woman touched his cloak. When Jesus felt the energy leave him, he turned around and asked who touched his garment. The woman came up to him and falling on her knees told him her whole truth. He listened and told her that her faith had healed her. She was changed by that encounter and left a different person. Though we will never heal someone like Jesus did, we are called to be Christ on earth and the time we spend with someone can make a difference in their lives. Lord, help me to see that spending time with others in conversation is a gift to them.
Kurt Peterson
January 26, 2023 - Innocence
My wife, Sarah, shared a story with me from when she was at Mass a week ago. During the offertory a family from the community brought up the gifts. Their young toddler attempted to climb the steps up to the altar. His father began to stop him but Father Bony told him to let the child continue. The toddler walked up the steps and stopped to look up at the Crucifix, he stared at it for a couple of seconds, then walked up just past the Altar in front of the risen Christ. His head slowly moved up starting at Jesus’ feet, over his hands and up to Christ’s face. There, the little boy stopped and just looked at Jesus’ face for about ten seconds, then turned around and came back to his parents. As the family walked back to their pew the little boy kept looking at the Risen Christ. While all this happened, everyone was quiet. Sarah said it brought tears to her eyes. Listening to Sarah I could just imagine how profound that moment was. Sometimes it takes the action of an innocent child to remind us of what our faith is all about. In the gospel of Matthew 19:14 Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.” This showed we are all welcomed at Mass no matter how we look or how old we are. We are so blessed to have Father Bony who welcomes children at Mass along with their noises and curiosities and he sees this not as an annoyance but a moment of learning. Lord, help me to know you and the greatness of your knowledge and still maintain the heart and spirit of a child.
Kurt Peterson
January 27, 2023 - Rain
Finally, we are getting some needed rest from the rain that has come through our area for over the last 3 weeks. The winter storms have allowed the rain to fill many of our reservoirs and the snowfall to build up our snowpack that will help us through the long dry summers where are hills turn to a golden hue. That is why we are called the Golden State. But getting too much rain or snow at once leads to flooding, failing trees, rockslides, and avalanches. These successive storms left many people without power and caused some deaths. Nature reminds us that even life-giving things like water and sun can become destructive if taken to the extreme. There are life-giving things in our own lives that can be destructive if taken to the extreme. That is why trying to strike a balance in life is important. But staying in balance does not mean that everything is equal in my life. If you have ever tried skiing or bicycling, you know your balance is achieved by managing the different tensions. Constantly adjusting is what keeps us in balance. Dear Lord, help me to be aware when I am allowing one tension to get too great and help me adjust that tension to keep in balance.
Kurt Peterson
January 28 2023 - Wisdom from a Teddy Bear
Winne the Pooh said, “You’re braver than you believe and stronger and smarter than you think”. I underestimate my abilities all the time. I think we all doubt ourselves at times but it is human nature not to fully realize what we are capable of. But God knows what we are capable of and throughout scripture God choses ordinary common people to send his message to the world. From the prophets to the apostles, to the saints, God calls ordinary people to rise to their potential. He is calling me to my potential too. I may be thinking: what can I do? I will try to follow the advice of Mother Theresa “Do small things with great love”. A smile, a conversation, holding the door open for someone, just being kind to one another. That is what Pooh did.
Kurt Peterson
January 29, 2023 - Simplicity
One of the greatest aspects of Jesus’ teachings from God is its simplicity. God takes all the laws and rituals and scriptures and boils it down to two commandments. Love the lord your God with all you mind, all your heart and all your soul and all your strength. And love your neighbor as yourself. As I strive to do this I am reminded of future rewards with the two words “blessed are”. To me the Beatitudes are the instruction book for how to live out the two great commandments. “Blessed are the poor in spirit” is to know that God owns everything I have, I am only a steward. “Blessed are the gentle” means that unrighteous anger and hatred can not be part of my relationship with others. “Blessed are those who mourn” is to be vulnerable to others. “Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness” means I must seek to understand God and my neighbor. “Blessed are the merciful” is for me to show the same mercy to others that Jesus showed me by dying on the cross. “Blessed are the pure in heart” means that God controls my heart and thoughts, not myself. “Blessed are the peacemakers” is not to be a push over but to help find common ground between my enemy so we can move towards a common goal. “Blessed are the persecuted” means that many will try to twist my words for their goal. And for me to understand that I will be rewarded by God not by Man. Gods message is simple but because of my human nature it is the hardest to live fully. Thank you, Jesus, for the sacrament of reconciliation that allows me to begin again when I stumble.
Kurt Peterson
Reflections for Jan.16-22, 2023
January 16, 2023 - New Wine and New Wine Skin
“No one pours new wine into old wineskins. Otherwise, the wine will burst the skins, and both the wine and the skins are ruined. Rather, new wine is poured into fresh wineskins.” (MK 2:22) This practice preserves both the wine and wineskin. The focus here is a paradigm shift from old and traditional religious practices to embracing the person of Christ. This was a new and hard message for many of Jesus’ contemporaries. Breaking the traditions was considered to be a sin. But new wineskins expand as fermentation takes place. So we should constantly be renewed and expanding in our faith as we receive the new message of the Word of God and deepen our relationship with Jesus. The WORD’S new messages also transform me in him, and I grow in Jesus and with Jesus, becoming refined and like good wine over time.
Bony
January 17, 2023 - The Sabbath - Lord’s Day - Celebrating life in Christ.
“The Son of Man is lord even of the sabbath.” (Ref. MK 2-18-28)
Jesus was confronted by his contemporaries regarding the tradition of keeping the sabbath since his disciples broke it. His answer was, "Can the wedding guests fast while the bridegroom is with them? As long as they have the bridegroom with them, they cannot fast.” The sabbath was observed as a holy day of obligation dedicated to God. But Jesus gives a new meaning to it.
The Catholic tradition keeps ‘Sunday’ as the Lord’s Holy day of Obligation. While I was growing up, this was a priority: a day of celebration with Jesus – learning catechism, going to church, and the only day in a week we had meat. We joyfully celebrated the day with Christ and His Community! Growing up as a cradle Catholic in a Catholic family, this tradition of going to church was a ritual of life, thanks to my family! I later realized that this day is not just a day of obligation; it is a true day of celebration with Christ and His Community.
Bony
January 18, 2023 - WITHERED
Jesus said to the man with the withered hand, "Stretch out your hand." He stretched it out, and his hand was restored. (Ref. MK 3:1-6)
I had a classmate in my school days whose right hand was withered, but his left hand was stronger than anyone’s normal hand. He was a great ‘kabaddi’ (kabaddi is a team sport popular in India) player and a pillar of our team. The opposite team would try to take advantage of his weakness, but other teammates covered that weak side. This example is like a call from Jesus to support the weak with our help. There is no appointed time for it; NOW is the time.
Spiritually, I feel withered when I fall into sin. Then I hear Jesus’ voice, ‘stretch out,’ ‘show me,’ and I remain open to his mercy. I am fully restored to his grace and strengthened by the power of this, His mercy.
Bony
January 19, 2023 - ‘People wanted to touch Jesus’
“He had cured many and, as a result, those with diseases were pressing upon him to touch him. (Ref. Mk 3:7-12)
People were attracted to Jesus because he healed many. There is a school for children with special needs in my home diocese in India. Every visit there is a great experience; the children come to you to touch and hug you. They show their love to you; very expressive in their love and at the same time, I feel that they are deprived of love and attention and are looking for more love.
People touched Jesus because they wanted to be healed – physical healing and getting their needs fulfilled. And they came from beyond Israel. So also, I am called to go beyond my boundaries to touch people and share Jesus’ love, compassion, and his power of liberation.
Jesus, help my little faith and heal my body and spirit as I touch you in Holy Communion; your every touch gives me comfort in my afflictions.
Bony
January 20, 2023 - The Apostles
“He appointed Twelve, whom he also named Apostles, that they might be with him…. (Ref. MK 3:13-19)
It was Jesus’ significant step to constitute the people of God to share His mission (NJBC) -He called people to be with Him. By baptism, we are also made part of this significant group. And as an ordained priest I am additionally called to be with him without any reservation.
After the first three years of my seminary formation, I was planning to leave my home diocese for another mission diocese in northeast India. I shared my intention with the director, Msgr. Varghese. After listening to me, he said, “you may want to go on a mission; pray to Jesus to help you discern, to know what Jesus wants you to do.” After prayer and discernment, I decided to remain in my home diocese and was ordained a priest for Jesus’ mission in that diocese. Jesus was telling me to be Him for His mission in my own diocese.
Bony
January 21, 2023 - Sound Minded Jesus
“When his relatives heard of this, they set out to seize him, for they said, "He is out of his mind." (Ref. MK 3:20-21)
The relatives’ trying to restrain Jesus might be due to concern for his safety or fear of losing the family reputation or embarrassment after the growing rejection of and opposition to Jesus from leaders. It could also be due to their disbelief and not trusting him. In the eyes of humans, Jesus seems out of his mind. But Jesus was ‘clear in his mind’ regarding his mission - to do the will of the Father.
Having lived with my grandfather, an ardent believer and a teacher, I witnessed many debates about Christianity and God with his communist friends. For them, those who followed religion were out of their minds. It might be because of his testimony that all those people later embraced Christ and were faithful Christians. The rejection of God coming from a non-believer and outside of the family of Christ can be understood. But if it comes from within the family of Christ, it is painful, which we witness these days. They do not realize they are also members of the body of Christ.
Jesus, strengthen me in the conviction: ‘to live is Christ and die is gain’ (Philippines 1: 21) ‘
Bony
January 22, 2023 - The Light House
“The people who sit in darkness have seen a great light; on those dwelling in a land overshadowed by death, light has arisen. (Ref. MK 4:12-17)
There is a lighthouse on the beach in my hometown. This lighthouse was built in 1862, and since then, it has been a pointer to the ships coming to the port. Though the port has decayed, the lighthouse functions well and attracts many. The lighthouse is an icon of our town. As a child, I was delighted to look for the light rays flashing at night from my house.
The light and the darkness are used to depict good and evil. Jesus, our perpetual light shines and enlightens every one of us. We are called to walk in the light of Christ. In the baptism ritual, we light a candle from the paschal candle, and give it to the newly baptized as we pray that they keep this entrusted light burning brightly, and that one who Christ has enlightened will walk always as the child of light.
Lead, kindly Light, amid the gloom of evening. Lord, lead me on! Lord, lead me on! On through the night! On to your radiance! Lead, kindly Light! (John Henry Newman)
Bony
Reflections for Jan. 9-15, 2023
January 9, 2023- Coming Clean
What a great way to begin the work week, celebrating the Baptism of the Lord, a great Feast Day reminding me of the fact that Jesus was true man as well as true God. He joined other Jews going to receive this joyful cleansing from his cousin, John the Baptist. Of course Jesus was a man without sin but he was a great role model proclaiming by his actions what was (and remains) important in those who follow and worship God the Father. Can you remember your baptismal day? Probably not because many of us are baptized as infants. I, on the other hand, as an adult “convert” was baptized at age twenty on a cold Christmas Eve by the priest who’d instructed me on what being a Catholic is (pre R.C.I.A.). For some reason he was satisfied that I was serious and he had no qualms about dousing my head with ice cold water at a stone font. Baptism for anyone comes with the expectation that each of us “…pay it forward” by practicing what we believe. For each person that practice is different but I have Jesus’ example of ministering to people’s needs. He cured illness, taught the meaning of scripture, listened to peoples’ hurts and responded with love. As a baptized Catholic washed clean in the waters of Baptism, I try to follow Jesus’ lead. Pray for me as I continue to pray for you.
Deacon David
January 10, 2023 - Looking Back
Have I made my resolutions for the New Year? Truthfully, no, and further I must admit that in years past I’ve not made resolutions because I haven’t gone into a new year willing to change anything. Oh yeah, there are a few pounds I’d like to lose but I know, in my heart of hearts, that I won’t stick to an eating regimen for more than a couple of days and then the left over Christmas cookies surely cannot be wasted….that would be wrong. Last year I did make one promise to myself that I’ve mostly kept: more prayer time. I tried to keep in mind that any and every aspect of daily life can be an occasion of prayer. For instance, when I’m stuck at a notoriously long traffic light, I stop fuming and being anxious and instead use the few extra moments to pray for those who are stuck along with me and for safe travel for the rest of the journey. That leads me to being aware in any spare moment to pray for those people who’ve asked for my prayers on behalf of their intentions be it for a loved one dealing with illness or need or simply in thanksgiving for prayers answered. I’ve found great comfort in this new (for me) way of talking with God more. That is looking back on 2022; now on to 2023. I must ask myself: what changes am I willing to make this year? Meanwhile, I need to take care of those left-over Christmas cookies. Deacon David
January 11,2023 – Finding God in Music
I enjoy listening to music, music from my younger years mostly, the 40’s through the 80’s and I admit to being ignorant of present-day popular music. As an aside I am a fan of the television program Jeopardy and one of the common categories of answers is popular music. I know absolutely nothing of current artists or song titles, so I can hardly ever supply the appropriate question. My favorites range from the “rock” era with Fleetwood Mac to my present day appreciation of modern jazz. During Christmas I enjoy all the old favorite hymns and I was surprised to learn that during the past four years Mariah Carey held the top spot singing about all that she wanted…but I didn’t listen to the proper venue to hear what that was. There are also newer Christmas carols being sung in church but I’m not able to sing along being unaware of proper tunes and lyrics. This is where I have to remind myself that God exists in all aspects of my life, including current songs and singers. Just because I prefer the old doesn’t mean God isn’t present in the new. Lord, open my ears and my heart to your universal presence.
Deacon David
January 12, 2023 – Finding God in Reading
Every once in a while in conversation, the subject of favorite books comes up. I’m amazed at friends and family members who seem to read constantly and know all of the current titles and authors and can discuss the merits of each book. When I’m asked what my favorite book is my answer is constant: Catch 22 by Joseph Heller. I’ve read that book about eight times and plan to read it again. Why? You may ask. Part of the answer is that book, amongst all that I’ve read, seems to have the most life, real life, lessons of any book. In it an old Italian man tells Yossarian he should learn from history and not rely on current day information. But wait, you may say, how can you know there aren’t others with equal or better lessons. The Gospels and the Acts of the Apostles, for example, are also full of life lessons and road maps for me to follow, which I try to incorporate into my daily life. But I must admit that I find the relative recency of the time period in Catch 22 meaningful. God is present for me in Catch 22 as He certainly is in the Bible but also in other secular writing as well. The lesson to me is that God can be found in many of the things I read, from the daily newspaper through novels and the Bible. The key is for me to pay attention to the lessons He presents to me in many ways.
Deacon David
January 13, 2023 – Food for One Another
Did you overeat during the Christmas season? I did. Family gathered mainly at our house this past Christmas and everyone brought food and drink for about 20 of us. Low calorie? No. Healthy? Well, there were some fruits and veggies but lots of buttery stuff. Since it was at our house, we got the majority of the leftovers. Amongst us there were Catholics, Jews, non-believers and agnostics. Our table was all inclusive and we tried to make the prayers inclusisve too. The many gifts of God, including Jesus the newborn, were acknowledged by all, celebrated at the table and throughout the house. Food was the secular communion that fed our togetherness for three days. While Jane and I were the only ones who assisted at Mass there was a celebration at home that united us in spite of our faith differences. We, it seems, were food for one another in our conversations and being together. What a wonderful time it was, celebrating the birth of our Savior, each in our own way… food for all.
Deacon David
January 14, 2023 - Colors
One of the guests in our home this past Christmas was a lady suffering from macular degeneration, a condition that gradually robs a person of sight. She can still make out forms but needs to hear voices to identify with whom she is conversing. She let us know that she also has lost the ability to see color and that all is in black and white. That revelation brought to mind how fortunate I am to have recently regained clarity of sight through cataract surgery that replaced the clouded lenses in my eyes. I can now see well enough to read without glasses and the world is sharper and brighter. I can enjoy the marvelous colors in nature more clearly. People often ask what my favorite color is and, without fail, I reply RED. It is the most brilliant of colors and I enjoy it particularly in clothing. When the occasion arises, the vestments worn by clergy make use of red. For me it signals that something special is going on. We use red to remind us of those saints and martyrs who have died for the faith we share. It also brings to mind the presence of the Holy Spirit with us. God has blessed me with the eyes to see and appreciate Him in nature and in the people who inhabit it. Let me keep in prayer those who lack the sight to see what I sometimes take for granted.
Deacon David
January 15, 2023 - Rain
I’m writing this reflection about two weeks before you’ll be reading it. The day is cold and rainy as it has been for several days and will be for several more according to forecasts. I enjoy the rain here in Northern California because, as a born and bred Southern Californian, I didn’t often see such rainfall. The rain today reminds me of having been baptized on a cold and rainy Christmas eve and hearing the words admonishing me to go into the whole world and share the Good News of Jesus Christ. I didn’t understand then the full import of those words and how my life would be shaped by that Sacrament. Today’s God given gift of rain to replenish the reservoirs and groundwater tables is a sort of metaphor for what waters of baptism do for each of us who have been baptized. Though I remember my baptism while many cannot, we can all appreciate what that water has done for us and what it leads us toward. We too are replenished. In today’s Gospel reading I heard John the Baptist talk about baptizing with water and awaiting Jesus’ baptizing with the Holy Spirit. We have been abundantly gifted with both of those just as the earth has been blessed with God’s gift of rain. I need to remember that those blessings are not just for me but to give me the grace to proclaim the Good News with my life.
Deacon David
Reflections for Jan. 2-8, 2023
January 2, 2023- Word for the Year
Here we are again! It’s the time of year when people make resolutions to exercise more, lose weight, etc. As we know, these resolutions hardly ever last and it is easy to completely forget them a few weeks into the new year. However a few years ago, it was suggested that instead of making resolutions, it might be more fruitful to concentrate on a word or intention for the year. Do I want to be more prayerful? Do I want to be more authentic? How about having a better work/life balance? Last year, I happened to choose “healing” and little did I know how appropriate it would be!
One person I know took this a step further and chose a symbol to help remind herself of her intention. She had chosen the word “connection”, hoping to spend the year appreciating how she was connected to her family, friends, and the earth. She chose to clip a safety pin to whatever she was wearing each day as a visual reminder. It was both clever and effective! It is not necessary to let others know your word (and sometimes that is preferable).
Lord, help me do the deep inner work this year as I focus on one thing that might draw me closer to you.
Darcy Wharton
January 3, 2023- “It’s Not the Song”
One of my favorite activities is singing with the 5:00 PM Sunday choir. I am awed by the talent of the musicians and my fellow singers. I am aware of the time and effort that goes into the music selections and that many people put into practice during the week and during our rehearsals. It is very easy as a musician or vocalist to spend too much time worrying about “doing it right” so as not to make a critical mistake.
However, each week our leader Greg Pfister prays with us prior to Mass. We call to mind special intentions and then he always ends with, “It’s not the song, it’s for whom the song is sung.” I’m not sure how he came up with the phrase, but it is a powerful reminder for me that ultimately my focus should be on praising God and less on the technical skills required to sing well.
Perhaps I should bring that sentiment into my work as well. “It’s not the work…it’s for whom the work is done.”
Darcy Wharton
January 4, 2023- Learning from our Children
Today is the birthday of our middle daughter Sarah, a person who has always been interested in learning. To me, she epitomizes the idea of lifelong learning. School always came easy to her, and she is a voracious reader. Often her conversations are “over my head”. Through the years, I have turned to her to explain things to me and fortunately, she generally has the patience to do so. She has clearly made me a better (and more informed) person.
I remember at times when she was growing up that I felt a bit intimidated by her knowledge. After all, weren’t parents supposed to be the ones teaching their children and not the other way around? It takes humility to realize that our children may be our best teachers.
Lord, help me to be open to learning through whomever you place in my path.
Darcy Wharton
January 5, 2023- Reset or Replace
Sometimes the most ordinary situations bring insight. Not long ago we were preparing breakfast when we realized that one of our outlets in the kitchen wasn’t working. Had we tripped a circuit? Did we need to reset a GFCI (ground fault circuit interrupter)? I quickly darted around the house resetting all the GFCIs and testing all the nearby outlets. When you live with a husband who is an electrical engineer, you know that a tool called a multimeter will soon come out. Before long, he determined that the GFCI switch itself had gone bad and needed to be replaced. I also received a lesson on the fact that the GFCI protects the other outlets that are connected to it. Like so many other things in life, one thing connects to another!
It got me thinking. What in my life needs to be “reset” and what needs to be “replaced”? Sometimes I just need a moment of reflection to change my attitude (reset) and other times I need to remove or change my actions entirely (replace). Whether I am resetting or replacing, I know that my decision will influence those around me.
I’m convinced that God uses anything, anyone, and everything to teach me!
Darcy Wharton
January 6, 2023- God Loves You
Many of you remember Fr. Michael Dillon, the founding pastor of SS. Peter & Paul. Everyone who mentions his name to me is quick to point out that one of their favorite things about him was his homilies. They speak of his ability to take the events of the world and tie them to the Gospel. I once asked him what he felt was needed for a good homily. He said one should never make more than one “point” because people would forget anything more than that. He also said that the most important information to convey in a homily was that God loved them. He felt that if he could find a different way of saying that every week, it would be enough.
Over the years, I have come to understand Fr. Dillon’s wisdom. To the degree that I can accept God’s love, I can be transformed by it. God’s love has the power to carry me through difficult times and helps me share that love with others in need. It’s a message that I could hear over and over again and it would never be enough!
Darcy Wharton
January 7, 2023- Hidden Pain
The topic of suicide hit the news recently with the loss of the famous hip hop dancer, choreographer and television personality Stephen Boss, better known as “tWitch”. Many of his colleagues in show business expressed shock at his death. Comments such as “he had everything going for him” and “how could he do this to his family and friends” filled the internet.
As a sibling of someone who died by suicide, I can tell you that we truly never know what is going on internally within a person. There is often deep pain that may go back to childhood trauma or depression that isn’t adequately treated.
Some of you may know that the Catholic church prohibited funerals for individuals who died by suicide until the 1980’s. Fortunately, the Church now understands the relationship of mental illness and suicide and families can now be comforted by the church’s funeral ritual. God’s mercy and forgiveness is available to all, and I am grateful for that.
Lord, help me reach out to any who suffer. May those who suffer any form of mental illness find the help they need and may they begin to see themselves through your lens.
Darcy Wharton
January 8, 2023-The Most Precious Gifts
I find that the most meaningful gifts are often from children. They seem to find such authentic pleasure in giving gifts to their parents or siblings and it is hard to miss the love that goes into the giving. This past year, I was reminded of the pure love of children when one of our young parishioners, Aloma, came up to me one Sunday with the biggest hug after hearing about my accident and praying for me in her home. She must have felt that the hug wasn’t enough (it was!) so she dug into the bag she was carrying and gave me a necklace that she had made that consisted of plastic beads threaded onto yarn that spelled out her name. It was such a sweet gesture. Even after I protested, she insisted that I keep it. Her spontaneous generosity warmed my heart.
No doubt the generosity and love of the wise men that we celebrate on Epiphany also touched the heart of the Holy Family.
Lord, help me give spontaneously and generously.
Darcy Wharton
Reflections for Dec. 26, 2023-Jan. 1, 2023
December 26, 2022 – Reminding
I don’t know what happened to me this year during Advent - I just couldn’t get it together to light the candles on Sundays. Inevitably we would get home from mass on Sunday and get right into our evening routine of dinner, books and bed, and then it would be mid-week and the girls would have to remind me to light the candles.
This is very uncharacteristic because I LOVE Advent – it is my favorite season! It has also become my daughters’ favorite as we light the Advent candles and sing “Ready the Way.” There must have been something about this year and this season though which called for some reminding. It is true that there will be a day when I don’t feel as though I am “chasing Advent” - I will be able to sit and pray with the daily reflection book, and remember to light the candles. But for now, in this season of my life, I consider it a gift that my own children are reminding me.
These gentle nudges from my daughters to light the candle seemed to be God’s way of turning my attention to the awe and wonder of celebrating the season with and alongside my children. Sometimes I just need a little reminding…O Come O Come Emmanuel!
-Katie Maynard
December 27, 2022 – Silent Night
In my graduate studies in Theology I took a class called “Crucifixion and Resurrection in Art & Theology.” During one lesson we studied the work of James Tissot, and I was fascinated by one particular piece called, “What Our Saviour Saw from the Cross” illustrating the crucifixion narrative. It was painted from the vantage point of Jesus on the cross looking down upon those gathered at his feet as he was crucified. It is a striking image as you see smirking soldiers, solemn onlookers, worried disciples and a devastatingly grief-stricken Mary.
I thought about this image a few weeks ago during our parish Christmas Concert as the choir sang “Silent Night” in different languages. As I looked at the resurrected Christ above the altar, I imagined what he might have seen looking out onto our congregation: mothers in tears as they watched their children (of all ages) sing, people singing along as this popular carol was sung in their native language…a beautiful prayer lifted up in song.
I find it helpful to pray with “what our savior sees” as it reminds me of how he is beholding and inviting me to come just as I am…the same way he did that Silent Night in the manger…with arms open wide.
-Katie Maynard
December 28, 2022 – Friendship
One evening as I was tucking my daughter Noelle into bed, she shared a sweet story of a kindness she had shown towards another student who was being excluded. As I was moved by the story I said to her, “Noelle, I wish you were my friend when I was young.” And she replied, “Me too, but you’re my mom and that’s way better!”
Friendships have been difficult for me in my life – meeting new friends and teammates as we moved to a new city, inevitably being the one left out in a group of three, mean girls passing notes about me, and good friends who have taken advantage of me. I have a vivid memory of being a teenager and praying at bedtime for Jesus to take away my struggles. Come to think of it, that is all we can really do: surrender, bring our burdens to God, and trust that it is more than enough, because it brings peace to our wounded hearts. No matter how much I wish that Jesus could have been my friend here on earth, He is my God and that is way better!
-Katie Maynard
December 29, 2022 – Bubble Up
I was volunteering at my daughters’ school the other morning, and I noticed a little kindergartner skipping on the sidewalk all the way into her classroom. It brought a smile to my face, because it was like joy was bubbling up right in front of me. It made me think, “What if my joy was right on the surface?”
My ability to be present to the moment and to those who are in my presence seems to allow my joy to bubble up to the surface. I know that Christ comes to us in the people we meet, even those most unexpected…and yet, it is a choice to be present to others as if I know that to be the truth. My husband and I recently had this conversation during an evening of L.O.V.E. ministry - what if we mirrored this truth to one another in every coming and going…of course we do this for each other much of the time, but what if our eyes lit up with big smiles every time we saw each other?
Possibly the greatest gift that we can give each other is to truly see and hear one another. Lord, I pray that I may give this gift: to see the light in others, to see you present among us…and in return, enlighten my spirit so that my joy may bubble up.
-Katie Maynard
December 30, 2022 – On a Mission of Love
I love when I hear my daughters ask Google to play a song from church – it’s a beautiful thing that they long to be moved by the melody or lyrics of these songs of our faith. My favorite instance of this though was the other night as I was tucking my daughter into bed and kissing her forehead, she whispered to me “I send you out on a mission of love” – not only moved by the song, but drawn to the words and using them in prayer for another person…for me.
Today we celebrate the feast of the Holy Family and the visit of the Magi: Balthasar, Caspar, and Melchior (or as my youngest daughter recently referred to them as: Bob, Herald, and Jeff). We read about Mary and Joseph fleeing to Egypt with their new baby and I can’t help but think of how they must have felt leaving the surprising safety of the manger. The fear of uncertainty would have been inevitable, and yet they were sent out, called by God and shepherded by angels to do God’s will…on a mission of love.
-Katie Maynard
December 31, 2022 – Noticing
The other day my daughter Grace was reading her book and as she finished and closed the book she lamented, “Ah man, now I have to wait for the next book to come out to find out what happens.” This is a familiar feeling as we find ourselves on the eve of a new year: closing a chapter, or being on the brink of starting something new.
In the midst of noise makers, party poppers and confetti falling, our family tries to make time for reflection on New Year’s Eve. Our kids have been putting their highlights, favorites, and resolutions into a time capsule each year, and we have done the same. It allows space for us to notice (my favorite word) the blessings of the past year, the graces in front of us, and that for which we “cannot wait”.
It’s hard to wait for the next chapter, but the gift of Advent can teach us: as we cross this threshold, there is increasing light as we anticipate new life on the horizon…may it light our path!
-Katie Maynard
January 1, 2023 – Full of Grace
I always feel all the feelings on January 1st – excitement for what lies ahead, hopefulness, and admittedly a bit of “overwhelm”. As a recovering perfectionist I can get caught up in wanting to get everything right from the get-go. So it seems fitting that today happens to be the feast of the Solemnity of the Blessed Virgin Mary, because who better to call upon in prayer at the start of something.
Mary, FULL of grace, knew what it felt like to stand at the brink of a new beginning and although I imagine feelings of being overwhelmed would have washed over her, the fullness of her God-given grace allowed her to stand ready and resolute. Blessed Mary, mother of God, at the beginning of this new year, cover me with your grace so that I might be in a place of “YES.”
Today though, I pray to two very important Marys in my life: not only to the Blessed Virgin Mary, but also to my Mama Mary. When my grandmother passed away over a year ago, I inherited a pair of her moccasin slippers. Lately, I haven’t wanted to take them off – they are so cozy and of course they remind me of her when I put them on. Mama Mary, as I walk humbly in your footsteps, may the warmth of your presence be with me in this new year to come and may I be reminded of who I am and whose I am.
Happy New Year – may you be covered in grace and coziness, wherever your footsteps may travel.
-Katie Maynard
Reflections for Dec. 19-25, 2022
December 19, 2022 - Privilege, Left-overs and Weeping
Recently at a family gathering people recounted stories of various interactions with our unhoused brothers and sisters. One aunt told of a man who asked for money that she didn’t have. Instead she offered him half of a left-over boxed sandwich. The man responded angrily with profanities about not wanting leftovers and walked away. An uncle offered his gloves to a barehanded man begging on the street in very cold weather and was rebuffed because the gloves inhibited his ability to grasp money. A granddaughter offered the observation “imagine what it must feel like to be offered leftovers”. What happened next was surprising. Good, generous people began to defend their actions instead of listening to why these actions might be experienced as offensive. This defense grew stronger as others offered opinions and experiences. Amid this discussion, the granddaughter left the room in tears: tears of frustration at not being heard or understood, tears for the diminished dignity of those for whom she was speaking, tears of tiredness…
Lord grant me the gift of weeping in remorse for the times I have given “leftovers” from my privileged excess without thinking of how the gift might be perceived. Grant me the gift of weeping for misunderstandings about charity, dignity and justice that continue to cause division, and let me weep in pride for a 20 year old granddaughter who was willing to remind a room full of privileged adults to recognize the need for human dignity we all share.
Jane Haproff
December 20, 2022 - Darkness
It’s dark at 5:00 p.m. these days. My mother had Sundowner’s Syndrome the last several months of her life, a condition that causes confusion, anxiety and/or depression in elderly people. It’s called “sundowner’s” because the symptoms worsen as the daylight fades. So while many people dislike the early darkness, it was especially bad for my mother. And, sadly because my mother was such a smart woman, she knew in the morning what the evening would be like. One of the suggested treatments for this syndrome is “light therapy”, lighting the environment with as much artificial light as possible in an effort to create a calming atmosphere.
This is all so relevant to me at this time of year as I drive down dark streets where homes are decorated with lights of all kinds. I wonder why we do this, why this is tradition. And I am reminded of my mother and what being without light was like for her. Christ is the Light of the World, and the symptoms that my mother experienced in illness can show us what life without that light might look like: …depression, anxiety and confusion. Come, Lord Jesus, and fill us with your light so that it shines throughout the world and no one is left in the dark.
Jane Haproff
December 21, 2022 – Sun Rise
The other morning I was up while it was still dark. I settled into my chair with a cup of coffee and watched the sun rise. And what a beautiful sun rise it was, a layer of dark blue, covering a layer of black sky on the horizon, intermingled with frothy white clouds. The sky above was grayish while sandwiched in between was a marbleized collection of pink and orange, mixed with shades of red and yellow pierced by the sun rising in what looked like behind all of these colors. I sat in awe at the beauty. The gospel of John begins by describing Christ as the light coming into the darkness and “piercing” it. That is what this sunrise looked like. It’s not just a dark world getting lighter. It’s the shocking appearance of what a ray of light does to darkness.
If Christ is the light, that sunrise was telling me what His light piercing the darkness of the world means. First, it is beautiful. One cannot help but gasp at the beauty and glory that is literally divine. Second, something is promised in the sunrise: a future where the darkness, whatever it is, is dispelled. And there it is: hope. The sun rise reminds me that a new day is dawning, second chances occur daily and salvation is drawing near.
Jane Haproff
December 22, 2022 - Sun Light
Sun light is bright, hot and revealing. Sometimes when I cannot see something clearly, small print on a package for instance, I’ll move into direct sunlight where I can miraculously see. Direct sunlight is also hot. We all know what being in the direct sun feels like in the heat of summer and how it can be almost unbearable. But that same sunlight in the winter is immediately comforting with its heat. If the sunrise means hope, sun light makes me think of faith.
There are so many times in one’s life when one might ask the question “why? or why me?”; times when all we have to fall back on is faith and trust in something bigger that we call God. It is then that Christ as the light makes everything clearer, and I can see for a minute what the world should look like, bright and shiny and clean. I remember that Jesus, the man, had moments of questioning and disappointment when he called out “why have you forsaken me”. Then I close my eyes, bring to mind His presence and experience God’s love as warm and bright. Faith…not the answer for all of life’s questions, but a clarifying brightness that helps me to put things into context and reminds me of the joy faith brings to my life. Then I can sing “joy to the world, the Lord has come”.
Jane Haproff
December 23, 2022 – Candlelight
As we light our Advent candles, I am struck by how different candlelight is from other kinds of light. A single candle doesn’t provide much illumination for one to see by, but it does induce a kind of meditative state of thought or being. Candlelight is soft and gentle; it’s not clarifying in the same bright way that sunlight is. It doesn’t expose things; rather it creates a kind of shadow world where you can observe things but not necessarily in all their reality. Candlelight invites introspection, thought, and sometimes sharing those thoughts with others. Perhaps candlelight can take us to a deeper or different experience of what is present to us. And there in that light, I experience the presence of Christ the light, inviting me gently to go deeper than the material world I inhabit, allowing me the opportunity for thoughts to wander, to speculate and to dream an alternative reality into existence. Another way that Christ is the light shining into the world.
Jane Haproff
December 24, 2022 – Fire Light
If you are lucky enough to have a working fireplace, you may be using it more frequently these cold nights. There is something about sitting in front of a fireplace or around a fire pit that evokes a sense of the profound. It does not clarify vision the way sunlight does, nor does it display the gentleness of candlelight. Instead there is something almost frightening about watching a fire burn. It can certainly invite some of the same kinds of thoughts one might experience with candlelight. But there is more to a fire. While providing warmth it also reminds us that that warmth comes at a price…something is being destroyed or consumed, whether it is firewood, cardboard, pinecones or gas emissions. Fire can take on a fierce aspect when it flames up at times. There is a danger associated with fire, while at the same time fire invites us to community, to gather around. How does this demonstrate Christ the light? Well for me it is twofold. There is power and might in this light, certainly attributes of God Himself; aspects of God that are awesome and for me, that can be frightening. There is also the call to community…. Perhaps it is that he wishes us to burn away the selfish self and join him in the world of community, living for one another as Father, Son and Spirit do. Christ, be my light in all aspects, even when what you reveal can be frightening.
Jane Haproff
December 25, 2022 - Gifts
Mary has been the focus of my thoughts this advent. Her pregnancy and all that it meant was announced to her by an angel. After the fear and awe had settled, she must have been eager to prepare for this child in all the ways that expectant parents do. Joseph, the carpenter, would have made a special cradle, while Mary was busy weaving and sewing baby garments. Then the news…they must leave for Bethlehem for the census. We know the story: no room at the inn, Jesus born in a stable and placed in a manger that held feed for animals. I tend to romanticize this story, but when I think of it in real human terms Mary must have felt disappointment at not being able to give this miraculous baby all the special things they had prepared. Stables are generally dirty, smelly places; it was cold and dark and scary to be without even basic creature comforts, happy just to have some shelter. And not much else. And then the shepherds arrive bringing joy, celebration and awe. Can you imagine for a minute what that must have meant to Mary? We all think our children are amazing miracles, but Mary knew hers was for sure and she had nothing special to give Him except her love. When the shepherds show up their presence was a gift to her, really the only gift she would receive for her child that night: they saw her child, recognized Him, and rejoiced. May we all bring those same gifts to Mary this Christmas. Merry Christmas
Jane Haproff
Reflections for Dec. 12-18, 2022
December 12, 2022—I Am Jesus
My wife, Cindy, and I spent about 10 days in September 2022, in Kaanapali, Maui, Hawaii. From time to time we drove a few miles down the road to Lahaina to buy food at the local Safeway or enjoy a dinner out. On several occasions, we saw a man standing on the road bearing a sign that read, “I Am Jesus.” We didn’t stop to talk with him, but his sign did get our attention.
A few blocks later, we passed a church that had a sign that read, “Jesus is Coming.” Did they not know that Jesus was already standing along the main road?
I don’t believe the man along the road was Jesus. (Luke 21:8 tells us, ”…many will come in my name, saying, ‘I am he;’ do not follow them.”) But we are, i.e., all of us, the Body of Christ and Jesus does breathe and move and live in us—His Body, where he is present.
In the first part of this season of Advent, we are reminded that we live in the final days, a time of mercy and hope to bring others into the kingdom of God. Perhaps this was the message the man on the road wanted to convey to anyone who would stop to speak with him. And perhaps the sign on the Church was also right: Jesus IS coming again and we have a lot of work to do to inspire hope and bring mercy to all we encounter.
Bob Leathers
December 13, 2022—Hawaiian Angels
Before our retirement in 2020, my wife, Cindy, and I spent about 10 days every other year in Maui. But until this September, we had not visited Hawaii in four years. We’ve always stayed in a timeshare with inviting views of the ocean and our daily routine consisted of an early morning walk, and then after breakfast, relaxing for the better part of each day in covered lounge chairs reading books or swimming in the pool (when we weren’t catnapping!). At night we went out for dinner at a nearby restaurant. Our 10 days were a welcome respite from our busy work schedules.
On this trip, we thought things might feel different because we had retired. Surprisingly we still felt rested, but some things were different. One of the two large pools was closed for renovation, so we couldn’t reserve our beach chairs with the usual ocean view. Also, some of the timeshares and local restaurants had closed or had reopened with limited capacity making reservations hard to get.
Enter three angels: Jeff, Connor, and Kama. They had the “Aloha” spirit and ensured we had a great stay. Every afternoon, Kama brought us an Otter Bar (a frozen fruit popsicle)! And one day Jeff and Connor surprised us by putting us up in a large, shaded cabana.
Every now and then God puts angels like Jeff, Connor and Kama in your life. I just need to be aware of their presence and be grateful for their company! Bob Leathers
December 14, 2022—Duke Kahanamoku
Whenever we visit Kaanapali in Maui, we like to eat dinner at Duke’s, just a 5-minute walk from our hotel. Duke’s offers great food, especially seafood, and it’s especially known for its Hula Pie, consisting of layers of chocolate cookie crust, macadamia nut ice cream, hot fudge, and whipped cream! Duke’s is named after Duke Kahanamoku. I knew nothing about him until we watched a documentary (The Waterman) about his life during our flight to Hawaii.
A waterman (or woman) is someone who can do everything in the water, including surfing, paddleboarding and swimming. Duke was a waterman and went from an unknown to a member of the Olympics team in three months. Duke was held in high esteem with great athletes like Jim Thorpe and Jesse Owens. He was a racial pioneer and an Olympic champion. He shared his joy of surfing with the people of Australia when he visited their country. Duke also saved hundreds of lives from drowning as a lifeguard. Duke was an Hawaiian, or rather a truly American icon and hero, embodying a tremendous Aloha spirit. The Waterman was an inspiring story and it made our recent visit to Duke’s restaurant most meaningful.
Duke touched many people in his lifetime. He shared his God-given talents to bring joy and inspiration to thousands of people, extending a warm Aloha welcome to everyone he met. I hope that you and I can also have an Aloha spirit to share our God-given talents with those we meet. Bob Leathers
December 15, 2022—Trophy Point
Trophy Point is a scenic overlook of the Hudson River at West Point, New York, and has been depicted in artwork since the early 19th century. It’s also the location of Battle Monument, one of the largest columns of granite in the world. It was the site of West Point graduation ceremonies before larger class sizes prompted academy officials to move the ceremonies to a larger venue.
As a cadet at West Point, Trophy Point was one of my favorite spots on campus to relax, meditate and pray. It still is, though regretfully I don’t get to visit Trophy Point very often. When I do get there, or even imagine myself there, the first words that come to mind are usually something like, “Lord, how wonderful you are. How can anyone witness this beautiful view—and so many other places in the world whose beauty inspires us whether far away or close to home—and not believe in God?” Bob Leathers
December 16, 2022—A Free Gift
I learned about Sleep-Eat-Pray during COVID from a virtual retreat presented by Fr. Brendan McGuire, currently pastor of St. Simon in Los Altos. (BTW, Fr. Brendan is coming to SS. Peter & Paul from January 22-24, 2023, to lead our annual parish mission!)
Fr. Brendan emphasized that we need adequate sleep (ideally 8 hours), good nutrition, and prayer to nourish our minds and bodies. Recently, the need for 8 hours of sleep was reinforced by Dr. Matthew Walker, PhD, a neuroscientist and professor of sleep medicine at UC Berkeley during a talk he gave at the Sacramento Speaker Series.
Dr. Walker made the point that we humans are the only species that struggle to get adequate sleep. He emphasized that our minds and bodies need good sleep to be healthy. Poor sleep can result in bad eating habits (which can result in a number of health problems). My guess is that poor sleep makes it difficult to pray, too.
Dr. Walker said that counting sheep doesn’t really work to put us to sleep. He does a short meditation. So I will try getting some good sleep tonight starting with a short meditation, and I will try to make it a habit. It’s free and it’s healthy.
Bob Leathers
December 17, 2022—The Voice
The Voice is a singing competition series on network television in which contestants vie for slots to be coached by one of four celebrity singer/judges. To be selected, each contestant must impress at least one of the four judges in a blind singing audition. Successful contestants are coached by one of the judges throughout the competition.
All of the contestants are talented singers and a handful are simply phenomenal singers who need little or no coaching but just an opportunity to be “discovered.”
In a recent episode, each of the remaining 13 finalists was asked to sing a song that changed their life. While most songs are secular, one of the finalists chose a gospel song, Break Every Chain, that brought all four judges to their feet in an ovation. The song began with: There is power in the name of Jesus…, and it was most inspiring.
God has indeed created us with our own unique gifts. I needn’t be afraid to use mine because God is grateful for the effort. There is power in the name of Jesus! Bob Leathers
December 18, 2022—The Bible and Movies
We hear much of God’s word from the Bible at our Sunday masses over a three year cycle and at our weekday masses over a two year cycle. So why do we keep hearing the same readings over and over again during these cycles? Perhaps the simple answer is that we need to hear and listen to them, and then meditate on what God is saying to us at that particular time.
Similarly, I have some favorite movies that I like to rewatch from time to time. One of them is The Wizard of Oz. While not a religious movie, there are scenes where you can meditate on what God is saying to you…if you just stop and listen!
Nathan Castle, O.P., has written And Toto, Too: The Wizard of Oz as a Spiritual Adventure. He writes that the lesson of The Wizard of Oz is that when you think you’re lacking something, you need to look inside. When Dorothy arrived in Munchkinland and wanted to go back home, Glinda the Good Witch suggests that the only person who might know the way was the great and powerful Wizard of Oz. Glinda goes on to explain that he lived in a faraway place, the Emerald City. There’s a moral to this storyline and other stories within this great movie. Our faith teaches us that God lives everywhere, including within our very
As we celebrate this 4th Sunday of Advent, I rejoice that the incarnate God is near. May we follow He who brings us true joy!
Bob Leathers
Reflections for Dec. 5-11, 2022
December 5, 2022 - Cookie’s Last Breath
Breathing seems so mindless and automatic most of the time as I go about my day. As my mother-in-law was in her final days of life, I had the privilege and honor of being there in her final moments. Death is not something that I was exposed to growing up. I never attended a funeral of a loved one before. It was so surreal and made me think of when I was about to give birth to my first child – everyone sitting around the bed, telling stories, laughing and crying and waiting with mixed anticipation for what would be next. We all gathered around her bed, my father-in-law saying prayers and last words of love and devotion, my sisters-in-law saying their good-byes and giving kisses. As she rolled on her side, she breathed her last breath. There was a long silence , a pause as if time stood still even though it was only momentary. After that brief silence, my in-laws asked if I would sing Amazing Grace as that was my mother-in-law’s favorite song. I sang as they sat around her processing that she had closed this chapter of her life and was now in a new place starting a new chapter. To be there and see her breathing one moment and in the next for it to be done. To watch someone take their last breath has an impact. I will forever remember that moment. I recently heard this song that sings, “it’s your breath in our lungs so we pour out our praise to you.” As I reflect on Cookie’s last breath, I am reminded that God sustains us and gives us breath to use it to bring praise to him in all we do. Bianca Hennager
December 6, 2022 - Hide and Seek
When the boys were little my husband and I would play hide and seek with them in our charming little home. The boys would find places to hide, and my husband and I would move loudly around the house calling out where we were looking for them. I remember our second son (the youngest at the time) squealing with his deep laughter at the thought of us not being able to find him. I was relieved that he was so loud, that I didn’t have to work too hard to find him. Even though he was loud, I would put on quite a show in finally reaching where he was hidden. As he matured, the squeals got less and he became better at hiding. I remember one time when playing the game, I couldn’t find him right away and became frantic. What if he had hidden himself in a place that was dangerous or I couldn’t get to? I began to panic as I was looking all over the house, trying to draw him out by calling his name. When I think of today’s Gospel, it reminds me of this moment. I imagine a Shepherd panicked at missing his one sheep; the relief the Shepherd must have felt when he found the sheep; pouring his love and warmth over that lost little animal.
It’s easy for me to hide when I feel shameful of my actions or wander away from the flock when I think I have a better route. However, Jesus is telling me that he always wants me with him and to be close to him; not to wander too far away. I am learning the best way to stay close to him is through the Sacraments and a regular habit of daily prayer. Sure there will be times when I am further away than I would like but I am grateful for a Good Shepherd who loves me despite all of my wayward ways. Bianca Hennager
December 7, 2022 - This Is Not What Was in the Brochure
A few weeks back I had the blessing of chaperoning our youth at the National Catholic Youth Conference. One of the speakers discussed how as we mature and begin our adult journey; we realize that life isn’t always what we picture and in essence it: “is not what was in the brochure”. I chuckled because I could relate to this feeling. Often, I have an ideal of what I think life should be like and then the reality of what I am faced with: the ideal house with the white picket fence vs. the well lived in, stained carpet home in need of some repair. So, it made me reflect on how I can embrace the beautiful mess of the life God has blessed me with. Often I can become frustrated when my expectations of life are not met whether that is due to my own faults or the unmet expectations of others. Reflecting on my expectations in life, I realized that any disappointment comes from a lack of trust in God. If I truly trust in God, what need is there that I have expectations? I don’t think I will ever get to a place of letting go of all of my expectations completely but I can certainly pause when I feel my expectations are not being met in life and put the focus on all of the blessings God has given me. Lord, thank you for my beautiful mess. I wouldn’t want it any other way. At times when I am overwhelmed by the messiness of my life let me turn to you and thank you for giving me this beautiful life. Bianca Hennager
December 8, 2022 - Facetime with God
While at the National Catholic Youth Conference, we attended Eucharistic Adoration. I have been to Eucharistic Adoration before and value the opportunity when it presents itself. During this most recent time, it hit me that adoration is “Facetiming with God”. As I was thinking of how best to make adoration relevant to my teens, Facetiming made sense to me. In addition, it reminded me of how much my teens like to Facetime with their friends and gave me a tangible way to relate this to them when we discuss our faith and building a relationship with God. So as my teens Facetime nightly with their select circle I remind them that when we are at Mass or Eucharistic Adoration we get valuable Facetime with God.
Lord, thank you for the opportunity to be fully with you in the Mass and at Adoration where you are ever present in the Eucharist. Through your sacrifice and love, I am able to fully experience you and see you face to face. Bianca Hennager
December 9, 2022 - Jesus I Trust in You
I learned this very simple prayer – so simple it is overlooked and one that I thought was not a prayer until a priest mentioned it recently. I have discovered this prayer helps me especially at this high stress inducing time of year as the holiday preparations are underway and my work is at its peak. As I begin each day, I say this simple prayer: Jesus, I trust in you; Jesus, I love you; Jesus, have mercy on me. I say this prayer as I breathe in and out deliberately slowing the pace of my racing breath and speeding mind. So far this has helped me to control my emotions and not to let my anxiety get the better of me in these stressful times. I repeat this prayer several times over the course of the day for about 5 minutes at various times or when I feel my anxiety increasing. It might be when I get into the car and am running late to pick up a kid or right before I go into back-to-back meetings for 4 hours. It can be while I am standing in line at the store trying to be patient with the crowds during this holiday season. This is such a simple and easy prayer for me that helps me to remember to slow my breathing down, slow my body down, and truly focus on what is most important: Jesus. Bianca Hennager
December 10, 2022 - Show, Row, and Know
At the Youth Conference the theme was “Get in the Boat” and over the weekend the keynote speakers gave energizing and inspiring talks about this theme centered on water and a boat while being with Jesus. One of the speakers used the phrase: “show, row, and know”. The main idea of the talk was that when we are battling storms in our life we need to show and tell God how we are feeling. Despite our feelings, God calls us to keep rowing throughout the storms of life and to trust in Him; and finally know that God keeps his promises and will restore us. There are times in my life when I am struggling with storms that can feel isolating and overwhelming. I can easily go down the road of “why me, Lord”? Hearing the speaker helped ground me in knowing that suffering or storms are inescapable. We all experience them on some level. What’s most important is to understand that God keeps his promises and will restore us if not in this life than in the next. As I weather my storms, I will try not to compare my boat to others, or whether my storm is heavier than my neighbor’s; rather, I will try to focus on the glory of God and how he keeps his promises and will restore me. Bianca Hennager
December 11, 2022 Patiently Waiting
Around the middle of October, after limping along for a while, our dryer stopped working. I immediately began pricing dryers and had about 4 different price points to share with my husband, who is slow to commit to large purchases, later that day. The cost seemed daunting to him even though to me it was a family necessity. I patiently waited for pay day at the end of the month. I was sure we would get a dryer then, so I stopped taking clothes to the laundromat. My husband had a different idea. Normally a moment of “intense fellowship” aka an argument would ensue. Disappointed that we could not agree, I returned to the laundromat. While sitting there, I prayed for the patience and ability to extend grace to my husband who was unable to act with the speed that I wanted. Returning home, I again inquired when we could get a dryer. We agreed to an alternate plan that required waiting a couple of more weeks. Time passed and it was the middle of November. Before I left for the Youth Conference, I asked whether he was ready to get the dryer and didn’t get a clear answer. Upon returning from the conference, he surprised me with a dryer – not the dryer that I had price matched, but a better model that far surpassed my expectations.
Lord as I wait for your arrival, let me be patient and not rush this season of waiting. Let me focus on you, gently praying and submitting myself to your will. Bianca Hennager
Reflections for Nov. 28-Dec. 4, 2022
November 28, 2022 - KonMari Method for the Soul
I often go on organizing purges in my home. It is my way keeping clutter and my life under control. Sometimes I’m unable to part with items or clothes that I haven’t worn or used in years. They will continue to collect dust in case I “need them someday” or “someone gave this to me”. After reading Marie Kondo’s book The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up, I realized there was a wonderful process for letting items go. She recommends that you embrace the each item you are sorting through and feel whether it is bringing you joy. If so, you keep it. If not, you thank it for the joy it brought you in the past and release it. She calls this the “KonMari” technique. It is a brilliant way to help manage your belongings by weighing the usefulness and sentimental value of items and then making a choice to keep them or to honor them and let them go.
As a Christian, after reflecting on this technique, I can see how this works with events and people in our lives. God wants me to hold the things close that bring me joy but let go of those things that have become a burden or painful. He asks me to forgive others while he offers me his grace and forgiveness. He gifted me with the Holy Spirit to help discern these things in my life. I think a little KonMari for the soul would be a great routine to incorporate into any Christian’s life.
Jen Payan
November 29, 2022 - A Request for Help
Recently I was preparing one of my tiny preemie patients for a central IV line insertion. The nurse specialist who would be inserting the line said she was going to step out for a minute while I gave the infant some medication to relax and put the baby in a comfortable swaddle. She returned, donned her sterile attire, and started the procedure. With ease she cannulated the tiniest vein in the infant’s arm and threaded a hair sized catheter all the way to a targeted area right above the heart. I let out a sigh of relief, having assisted in many of these insertions that can take hours and multiple attempts. I complemented her on her success. Her response really touched me. She shared that her routine before starting the procedure was a drink of water, a bathroom break, and a prayer that God help guide her.
This was such a great reminder to me of how I can use prayer and the power of the Holy Spirit in my practice more often. A quick prayer can be the calm I need and provide the guidance to act and make the right decisions. It can calm my fears, help me focus, and even steady my hands. Hopefully, we can all remember that whether the task is large or small, God will have our backs!
Jen Payan
November 30, 2022 - God-given Talents
While viewing some family vacation photos recently, I came across a few very special ones of my brothers.
The first was of my brother Paul, who is an amazing storyteller. I observed my children, nieces, and nephews all circled around him mesmerized by one of his tales. They were sitting quiet and captivated during long wait at a restaurant. He had created a character named Johnny Bobo who had all sorts of adventures that my brother would make up as he went along. Throughout their early years the children would be asking Uncle Paul to tell them a story about Johnny at every opportunity.
Then there were some photos of my brother Patrick, who can build or fix just about anything. These pictures were taken during a camping trip. He is helping each of the children chop kindling. With each one, he patiently held his hand around their small one guiding the hatchet with each chop. I can see my daughter’s little tongue sticking out in concentration as she tries to strike the wood in the correct spot. Uncle Patrick always knew how to teach them by letting them get their hands and minds involved.
Observing these photos, I’m reminded of how my brothers’ talents differ but how both are so enriching to the children. God gives each one of us very different gifts, but all gifts are meant to serve and enrich. I need to appreciate and use what I have been given and embrace those who have different talents.
Jen Payan
December 1, 2022 - Same Day Surgery
My son Michael had to get tubes placed in his ears when he was 18 months old.
Keep in mind that I’m a trauma nurse, who has seen just about everything. I’ve rushed people to operating rooms while providing breathes with a bag through an endotracheal tube. I’ve started IVs and used rapid infusers to deliver blood as quickly as possible while calmly telling a family what I was doing.
But now I was sitting in outpatient surgery with my littlest boy on my lap and starting to sweat. The anesthesiologist came in and asked me about my baby’s health and described how he would put a mask over Mikey’s face and deliver a gas to sedate him for the procedure. For some reason, at the thought of this, I began to sweat even more profusely, my face tingled, and I started seeing whiteness. I handed Mikey to my husband and put my head between my knees to keep from passing out. Fear had completely incapacitated me.
It is shocking the intensity of love and fear we have for our children. I try to remember this when I come across a scripture reading that describes God’s love for his children. Then I take it a step further, remembering that he allowed his only son suffer for us and watched as He did so.
Jen Payan
December 2, 2022 - Our Brothers’ Keeper
Every Friday my gym selects a veteran or public service officer who died in the line of duty to honor. A few weeks ago it was the story of Marine Captain Brandon Barrett. He died a young man during only his 2nd tour of duty. What I was taken by, was a story about his 1st tour of duty in Afghanistan. He obviously felt a deep responsibility for the group that he led. He was so committed to keeping his soldiers safe that he wrote letters to all of their parents, assuring them that he would take care of their children. They all returned safely.
Captain Barrett was committed to being his brothers’ keeper, which is what God asks of all of us. If I assure the wellbeing of those around me, I would truly be treating each person as God intended. Capt. Barrett kept this in mind in the stressful environment of war while he was under pressure and fatigued. If he could hold to this standard during such difficult times, I can certainly strive for this in my daily lives.
Thank you to Captain Barrett for your example and to all our veterans who demonstrate these same values.
Jen Payan
December 3, 2022 - A Place of Privilege
Nurses try never let their patients die alone. In my many years of working critical care there seemed to be an unspoken agreement among us that we would assure someone was present when family couldn’t be there. There were times when family simply could not get there on time or the patient didn’t have anyone. Sometimes it was just too difficult emotionally for loved ones to be at the bedside. This is when nurses step in.
I recall one of my co-workers being busy with an admission while her other patient, who had requested not to be resuscitated, was in his final moments of life. She grabbed me and asked if I could sit with him as a relief nurse. The ICU was chaotic and noisy that day so I closed the doors of the room and dimmed the lights. I just sat and held his hand while he passed.
In my years working in the ICU this memory stands out above many others. I remember how quiet and peaceful it was and how thankful I felt that one of us was available to sit with him. Most importantly, I came to the realization that being in that moment was one of the greatest gifts and privileges God has given me as a health care worker. Now I always hold the times that I’m with the dying very dear.
Jen Payan
December 4, 2022 - An Enormous Responsibility
Years ago I attended a presentation at a trauma conference about rescue efforts in the wake of the Oklahoma City bombing. I was moved by a story of a rescue worker who had the huge responsibility of viewing a specific point of the crumbled building through a scope. It was his job to order evacuation of the rescue workers if he observed the slightest shift in the rubble. Any shift could result in an entire building collapse that would put hundreds of workers in danger.
One afternoon, he sounded the alarm and an evacuation began. His team came to check on the building status and found him pale and sweaty. He was shaking and starting to cry. They viewed the points through the scope but found no change or movement. It was deemed safe for everyone to return to the rescue effort. It was only then that they realized they needed to shorten the viewing shifts and provide better support for those who had been assigned to the task. They hadn’t considered the enormous stress of holding so many lives in the balance and the emotional fatigue related to it.
I was moved by this story in a few ways. First, it demonstrates the extreme conditions and responsibilities that certain professions share and gives me great respect. It also brought my attention to being aware of the needs of the people around me. Like the rescue worker, some are experiencing this type of stress and fear constantly. Not only do we need to be able to recognize the signs of stress and fatigue in others but also in ourselves. I may need to “shorten my shift”. I may need to seek emotional support or provide support to someone in need. I ask that God helps me recognize that in myself and as well as in others.
Jen Payan
Reflections for Nov. 21-27, 2022
November 21, 2022 - Thankful
Don Eagle
November 22, 2022 – USS Arizona
November 23, 2022 - Men’s Day of Faith
Don Eagle
November 24, 2022 -Thanksgiving
Don Eagle
November 25, 2022 - Pre-Christmas
November 26, 2022 - Christmas
November 27, 2022 – A Christmas Letter
When blossoms flowered mid the snow,
Upon a winter night, Was born the Child, the Christmas Rose
The King of Love and Light
Years ago I wrote a letter to my father, which he loved so much he shared with a local newspaper. It was later published annually at Christmastime. It started out like so: “As I tucked Jenny into bed, my favorite Christmas song came on, and for some reason it reminded me of you…”. The song happened to be “The Christmas Rose” and I interspersed the lyrics into each line of my letter. I described memories of him walking in the snow, and singing in St. Olaf’s choir. The letter continued: “There are a good many things that I have to be thankful for, and one of them is you. From you, I inherited patience and an ability to get along with others, a love of music and a desire to be my own man. And I hope a certain kindness. You are a decent man, and in today’s, world, that is an accomplishment. You are a peace-loving man, and a devoted one as well. You have character and a solid, moral fiber. God knows we never say the things we really want to say, maybe it’s because we go through life in our own little worlds. But tonight I’d like to pause, Dad, and say how much I think of you. And how I think of you, and that you are both loved as a father and admired as being a good man.” See you at Christmas. Your loving son, Don.”
Don Eagle
Reflections for Nov. 14-20,2022
November 14, 2022 - A Movie Genre
For the past decade, the ‘apocalypse’ genre has been popular in film and television. My attitude toward these shows is strongly influenced by whether any actual science might support the premise, so I am usually not a fan. Underlying the narrative of many of these, though, is the meaning of relationships in the face of catastrophe. I didn’t think any of these movies would elicit reflection until I viewed, “The Day After Tomorrow”.
The interactions during the film made several impressions on me.
The actions and persistence of the main character reminded me that each moment I spend with those I love means something. Those times should have first priority. Matthew 6:21: ‘For where your treasure is, there also will your heart be”. Where do I want my heart to rest? Only I can recognize what I hold as my treasure and where I have placed my heart. This further reminds me of how Jesus never gives up. He provides instruction for me to thrive in the face of adversity. His persistence in reaching out to me with great effort and at great risk and sacrifice, for my salvation, is unparalleled. His pursuit of me, as my Savior, is unrelenting. There is no step He will not take in seeking me out. Clearly, I am His treasure, and His heart lies within me, and mine with Him, now and someday for eternity.
Ray Frink
November 15, 2022 - Adios, Goodbye, and Aloha
You might wonder where this title came from. The words certainly are from different parts of the world. I grew up in a largely Hispanic neighborhood. Many of my classmates and many of my friends were 2nd or 3rd generation Americans from Mexico or Central America. Thinking back on these times, the parting expression, adios, came to mind. Adios, when translated to English, means: to God. Goodbye is a late 16th century contraction of: God be with you. Aloha, translated from the Maori language means love, compassion, and kindness and is used as both a welcome greeting and an expression of parting.
All three of these greetings contain the essence of God, the essence of love. We use these expressions automatically without reference or consideration of what we are really saying. Imagine the impact on anyone as they are leaving that you are handing their welfare over to God. You are asking God to care for them. The first words of welcome or the last words of parting are an expression of love, compassion, and kindness.
In my family, there are other expressions: “Take Care”, “Drive Safely”, which was my Dad’s favorite; or to my sons, “Be Good”. All these expressions of leaving are a blessing. I will try to remember, the next time I part company with anyone, that I am giving a blessing and a grace, though they may not know it.
Ray Frink
November 16, 2022 - One Without the Other
Our parish is rich in couples who have been married for many years, including my own of over 4 decades. All you need do is look around at any Sunday mass to see them. They typically enter together, sit together unless one is ministering, and perhaps show affection at the Sign of Peace, the pandemic notwithstanding. They receive Eucharist together, some pausing to receive simultaneously. My dad used the expression that he and my mom, and others like them were two peas in a pod, an apt expression about filling a space and making it complete. My own parents were married for over 50 years, until my mother’s death.
It is common to say that in couples like this tone member is not complete without the other; you can’t fully be yourself without the other. Henri Nouwen reminds me in his writing that the same is true of the two great commandments: To love God with your whole heart, whole soul, and whole mind, and to love your neighbor as yourself. Nouwen writes: “It is following the first commandment that asks us to give everything we have to God that makes the second commandment truly possible.” If I fully love God and know that I am fully loved, only then can I love my neighbor with all their quirks, irritants, idiosyncrasies, and histories and in loving my neighbor, only then am I truly demonstrating in real time my love for God.
Ray Frink
November 17, 2022 - A Question Revealed
I am pretty good at Trivial Pursuit, the game that is both interesting and frustrating at the same time. On one occasion my younger son asked me, “How do you know all this stuff?” My response gave rise to what my family thinks should be the five-word phrase on my gravestone, “Everything in Life is Interesting”. This phrase came to mind recently when I read the introduction to Busy Lives & Restless Souls, a book discussed in the parish series. In the introduction, the author reveals a profound moment for her when she saw God in each of a series of unrelated events. She realizes that God is in all things and everything in life is holy.
When I read that, I thought perhaps everything in life is interesting to me because God is in all things, and I just didn’t realize it. Did a truth of my life just get explained and it’s been there the whole time but I was too busy, preoccupied, or simply not able to see it? I just thought it was my curiosity. I knew something was there, I just didn’t know what it was. Ironically, the realization that God is in all things is fundamental to the teachings of the St Ignatian spirituality I was exposed to in both high school and college. Sometimes knowing about something, knowing the details and explanations, is not the same as experiencing and learning the wisdom, the deeper meaning, of it.
Ray Frink
November 18, 2022 - Walls
When recently eating a triple chocolate cookie, having just been thinking about the Trinity, another three came together for me. This was a confluence of my son’s need for a new backyard fence, a Robert Frost poem written in 1914 that I like called “Mending Wall”, and current political debate.
“Mending Wall” is a poem written more like prose. It contains the well-known proverb, “Good fences make good neighbors”. It tells the story of two neighbors who meet once each spring to repair the stone wall separating their fields. This year, one neighbor questions why the two of them do this.
“Before I built a wall I’d ask to know,
What I was walling in or walling out,
And to whom I was like to give offense.”
There is no need for the wall. There are no animals to contain. One side has dense pine forest and the other an apple orchard. Yet one neighbor insists on maintaining the wall in that stretch also. Robert Frost speaks of a darkness that envelops the wall builder. He notes that there are forces in nature that bring walls down. Jesus’ message equally brings light into darkness and brings down walls. His message of love of neighbor does not allow for divisions whether literal or figurative. If I am part of the Body of Christ, should I have the figurative walls I create? Jesus spoke to Samaritans, Pharisees, tax collectors, Centurions, rich, and poor. I believe in a Catholic, meaning universal, church. So did Jesus.
Ray Frink
November 19, 2022 - All God’s Children
My father-in-law, Pat, died recently. It reminded me of the passing of my own father, Ray, 15 years ago. They were very different men. Born on opposite coasts 15 years apart, they had different educational experiences with very different lives and careers. They both lived through the deprivations of the depression and one experienced the horrors of war. They both married and provided for their families. My father-in-law was much more successful by societal terms and they had different experiences of their faith.
Ray was a convert to Catholicism. Pat was born into a Catholic family. My dad could recite in order the books of the Lutheran bible from memory. He had some Sunday school training. Pat grew up with Catholic teaching and traditions and continued these in his family until circumstances caused him to stop practicing his Catholic faith. Both men are children of God.
Jesus chose unschooled fisherman and skilled accountants to be his apostles. Likely some disciples were educated and some illiterate. It made no difference. Christ taught all who listened to Him how to live the two great commandments and expected all who heard him to act appropriately. Ray and Pat did. St Paul reiterates this when he tells the new Christian communities to embrace the rich and poor, the popular and the marginalized, with the love and requirements of Christian living. Pat and Ray were always on equal terms in God’s loving eyes. They can now share their earthly times with each other as brothers in Christ.
Ray Frink
November 20, 2022 - Eternal Life
My father-in-law was elderly and passed away from the ‘dwindles’. He had some medical problems, none of them terminal, but the combined effects greatly reduced the quality of his life. Though he was raised a Catholic and practiced his faith for many years, circumstances and choices caused him to no longer believe in God. He was a thoughtful man and claimed to be agnostic. As his life approached an earthly end, he demonstrated his love by asking for assurances that his wife would be cared for (that is assured) and that the spouses of his children would continue to take care of their partners (guaranteed for my wife).
Confronted with his mortality and the mortality of friends, acquaintances, and celebrities, I have considered my own. I know neither the time nor place. So, what shall I do?
Henri Nouwen says: “The great mystery of the spiritual life-the life in God- is that we don’t have to wait for it as something that will happen later. Jesus says: ‘Dwell in me as I dwell in you.’ It is this divine in-dwelling that is eternal life. It is the active presence of God at the center of my living- the movement of God’s Spirit within us-that gives us the eternal life.”
If you find me thanking you for being in my life, know that it is an expression of gratitude and joy for the earthly life I have had, have now, and will have. I will be allowing God’s in-dwelling spirit to flow out in my words.
Ray Frink
Reflections for Nov. 7-13, 2022
November 7, 2022 - Chapel of the Bones
The Capela dos Ossos (Chapel of Bones) in Évora, Portugal is a small interior chapel located next to the entrance of the Church of St. Francis. The Chapel was built by monks in the late 16th century to relocate the bones of thousands of souls who had previously been buried in medieval cemeteries in the area. Évora was wealthy and growing and the bones were removed to allow the land to be used for other purposes. The chapel is a stark contrast to the elaborate cathedrals of the same time period in Europe. The interior walls are completely covered with human skulls and bones. “Nós ossos que aqui estamos, pelos vossos esperamos,” “We bones are here, waiting for yours” is inscribed on the entry to the chapel and a beautiful altar and crucifix are the only things illuminated in the room.
As we stood in awe in the chapel, surrounded by the bones of thousands of souls long gone to their rest, I felt a deep sense of our shared humanity. We are created in Gods image, yet made from earth, dependent on God’s breath of life…bodies that are vulnerable and temporary. We die; we leave our bones behind that will eventually become dust. From dust we return to dust… I am, through God’s grace, fragile, beloved, and holy. The bones of all the departed wait for mine. I depend on God for life here on earth and eternal life that is to come.
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio
November 8, 2022 - A Lesson from Cork
Cork… not the city in Ireland, but the kind that keeps your wine fresh, that comes from trees. We had a chance to learn about cork during our recent trip to Portugal, which is the largest producer of cork products. They make all kinds of things from cork—shoes, purses, and decorative items. The cork is a fire resistant, layer of protection that grows on top of the bark of a particular type of oak tree. The best quality cork is produced if the layers are removed every nine years. The layer must be removed carefully, so as not to injure the soft, inner bark. Then the cork is softened in hot water to make it flexible so it can be formed into many wonderful, useful things.
Learning about this prompted me to think of lessons for my spiritual life. When I reflect on my life, I think about the protective layers I’ve built up over the years. Some were useful for a time, and some were not. Some served my growth for a while, some inhibited growth. I can see where God used people and experiences to remove old layers that I no longer needed, even as I clung to them. These old layers were sometimes immature beliefs about God or narrow views about other people. God softened the old layers to make room for new perspectives and to further my growth. God’s pruning is challenging sometimes, but his timing and precision help me reach my full potential.
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio
November 9, 2022 - God as the Master Musician
I saw a heartwarming scene recently. A music school had set up a piano in the middle of a busy town square, and its talented college students were playing as people curiously wandered over. Then the pianists began inviting young children to join them on the piano bench. The children, many of whom had never touched a piano before, were shown three or four notes to play in succession. The accomplished musician played beautiful chords and complicated sequences to accompany the simple melody. When the children played the wrong notes, the pianist would adjust so that the initial dissonance transformed into a new melody. The master musician then gently retaught the sequence, the whole time smiling warmly at the child. We were all spellbound.
I think God does that with our lives. God accompanies me in my small creative endeavors. He turns my attempts into beautiful music, and when I fail at something he opens new doors and new opportunities. He helps me learn to trust my efforts, to take risks. He accompanies me through life, holds my hand, and supports my melodies. Often though, I forget and think I have to do everything myself. Or I think I know how the melody should go, in spite of God’s leading. I wonder how much easier and fulfilling life would be if I could always follow the master…
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio
November 10, 2022 - Culture as Gift and Challenge
At Mercy Center, I’m helping with a program that is preparing bilingual/bicultural spiritual directors to serve our Spanish-speaking community. It is an honor to be a part of this group, and it challenges me to think about how culture influences our faith. I believe our faith is influenced by the culture in which we grow up. I think the challenge is not to view our faith and culture as synonymous. For example, does my faith value being independent and achieving status and possessions? Uh oh…those might be cultural values, but not Christian ones. Is my image of Jesus and Mary very European? Or am I comfortable with a Jesus who is brown or black? I’ve learned that being spiritually and culturally aware means being comfortable with a variety of ways of praying, of understanding my call to discipleship. I appreciate difference as a gift from God. I value prayer and scripture in different languages and different styles of music. To recognize that my brothers and sisters in Christ come from all over the world and represent a multitude of ethnicities, languages, and life experiences helps me appreciate how much God loves diversity. In nature, it is diversity that protects life for the future. When we consistently plant the same crop, it is more susceptible to disease or insects. When we endanger the diversity of habitats, we pay a price. How do we ensure that our faith community benefits from the diversity of cultures, gifts and experiences that are part of God’s gift to us?
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio
November 11, 2022 - The Church Is not a Building
Europe is full of large cathedrals. Some were built as early as the 12th century and others in the 15th and 16th centuries. The cathedrals are often full of priceless art work and are beautiful examples of Romanesque, Gothic, Baroque and Rococo architecture. They are full of intricate carvings covered in gold leaf—some altar pieces contain 800 pounds of gold…from the conquest of the Americas. They represent the power of the church and the royalty of the day. And…many of the churches function more as museums than as active parishes. People talk about the falling numbers of active Catholics, and Christians in general, in Europe. The United States is experiencing some of the same challenges.
While this is disturbing in some ways, I wonder if we are being invited to see where the Holy Spirit is calling us in new ways, outside of our buildings and our limited ways of experiencing Church. “The Most High does not dwell in houses made by human hands.” (Act 7:48) Perhaps the Catholic Church which was once very Eurocentric is being invited to look to leadership from other parts of the world. I feel excited by the prospect of a more inclusive, universal Church that listens to the Gospel proclaimed in the small villages in African, Asia and Latin America, a Church that values the powerless as disciples and prophets.
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio
November 12, 2022 - Learning to Listen as We Journey Together
I appreciated Kurt Peterson’s mention of Braver Angels in his reflection a couple weeks ago. I just happened to be reading the book, I Never Thought of It That Way, by Mónica Guzman, one of the leaders of Braver Angels, the group dedicated to listening across our divisions. Some ideas in the book that spoke to me are: Be genuinely curious when talking with another person about what they think and how they got there. Understand that everyone’s reasoning and beliefs make sense to them. If we walk in their shoes, we will better understand why they think as they do. “We don’t listen with our ears, we listen with our whole biography” says the author. Our life experiences filter our listening. I think that also applies to speaking.
Genuinely listening to understand another is not common, and not easy. More often while we are “listening,” we are critiquing the other’s thoughts and planning our responses.
I think Pope Francis’ Synod also focuses on genuinely listening to one another and listening to the Spirit that moves among us. I am called to journey together with the people of God, in all our diversity. Even as Catholics, we may feel divided at times. How much better would it be if I learned to listen to others with genuine curiosity rather than with a prepared counterpoint? Just as Jesus called a surprising group of diverse characters to be disciples, perhaps I will hear the Spirit speak in surprising ways through those with whom I adamantly disagree.
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio
November 13, 2022 - Soul Friends
I am thankful for so many blessings in my life, but one blessing that particularly stands out after the challenging past couple of years is the gift of soul friends. “Soulmate” is commonly used to talk about finding that one, special person that someone is meant to be with, but I’m thinking about something different. I’m thinking about the special friends with whom I can share myself unconditionally—my fears, my sorrows, my times of shame, as well as my joys and celebrations. They are the friends that most mirror Jesus to me. They know when to just sit and listen; they don’t try to fix me. They know my shadows and accept them. With soul friends, I can be vulnerable. I can be my whole, authentic self—no filters, no pretenses. When I’m honest, I realize how rare that is. I go through so much of life thinking about what others expect of me, what people will think. I measure my worth by people’s acceptance or rejection. Jesus modeled how to be a soul friend. He first offered unconditional love and healing, before he challenged people to change their lives. Rather than condemn, he asked reflective questions that raised people to their own worthiness. I wonder how different our relationships would be if we were better soul friends to each other.
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio
Reflections for Oct. 31-Nov. 6, 2022
October 31, 2022—Needing God
When my daughters initially heard about their overnight class field trips, they both begged me to chaperone their trips. I was so excited! But shortly into the school year, Grace started begging me not to go. She said I would be too embarrassing! While I take issue with being called embarrassing (I AM FUN!), I recognize that this is an age-appropriate feeling as she establishes boundaries and grows into herself. My kids are reaching the age where they don’t need me for everything. I hold both sadness for the end of that part of our lives, and joy that they are becoming independent people. I know that as my daughters grow, they will rely on me less, but will also still need me in new and different ways. As always, this relationship between parent and child makes me reflect on the relationship I have with God—and that God has with me. How many times have I thought that I didn’t need God, only to find myself running back to him? How long has He waited for me to recognize that I do need him? Thank you, Lord, for your patient and enduring love, and for waiting for me even when I said I didn’t need you.
Erin Gallawa
November 1, 2022—The Rule of Three
There is a rule in running that if you think about something three times, you ought to stop and address it. For example, if you feel a rock in your shoe, you can ignore it once. You can ignore it twice. But by the third time, you better do something about it! I have started to apply that principle to my life. When things won’t get out of my head, I need to address them. I think about all the messages that God is sending to me and the various ways he nudges me to hear him. When I hear the voice once, do I ignore it? How about the second time? And the third? Sometimes I need the reminder to be present to God’s words, so now I am counting. One… two… three… I hear you, Lord!
Erin Gallawa
November 2, 2022—Big Houses
Sometimes I think about my house, with its 3 bedrooms and a playroom and its spacious backyard with a teeter totter. We have all this space that we purchased for young kids—young kids who’ve grown into young women, and who will leave this home and its rooms empty. We build and buy houses to fill with potential. We dream of nurseries for unborn babies, islands for our loved ones to gather round, backyards where will we host summer barbecues and graduation parties. We think of how grandkids will come back to read the books our children left decades ago. We hope that the walls will be filled with joy. When I look around my neighborhood, what I see are big houses that are mostly filled with quiet. But this should not be reason for sadness. We know from scripture and experience that there is a season for everything. Just as in our Church, most moments are ordinary. Many days in the church building are dark and quiet. But when we slow down to reflect, we hear the echoes of the past—the baptisms, the weddings, the funerals, the Sunday celebrations. And we look forward to the future, when we will gather again to fill the space with love, hope and joy.
Erin Gallawa
November 3, 2022—Ring
One of my kids recently asked me what the word apostolic meant. I explained how “apostolic” points to our connection through history right back to Jesus himself. The apostolic nature of the Church is such that we know that the Catholic faith comes to us from the very apostles who heard the words from the mouths of Christ! But that is a textbook answer that doesn’t necessarily mean much to a child. A few days later I was making the bed when the sheet caught for a moment on the ring I wear on my right hand. I borrowed this ring from my mother on my wedding day. It is the ring she wore all my life until the day she gave it to me. It is the ring she got from her grandmother, who wore it for a lifetime before I was even born. I have wondered which of my daughters might want to wear this ring next, to carry on the memory of my great-grandmother who came from Spain to San Francisco and who I remember now, though I never met her, because of something handed down through generations.
I have never seen Jesus, neither have my parents or my grandparents, but the faith, like my ring, has been handed down, to be remembered and lived today.
Erin Gallawa
November 4, 2022—Wet healing
Earlier this year I fell while running. That is actually not surprising… I fall a lot when I run! But this particular time was the first time that needed medical attention. There was a hole in my hand and inside that hole there was a rock that I could not get out. So I made a 6:00am visit to the ER where the doctor pulled a good sized stone from my palm and then told me he couldn’t do much for the wound. He explained that if I let the wound dry, it might heal quickly but would leave a scar. The alternative was to let it heal wet. I had never heard of this before, but I decided to try it. I won’t lie… it was a pretty gross process. But it was also fascinating, as there was never a scab over the hole in my hand. It took a lot more care than other wounds I’ve had. I had to tend to it daily and watched it heal over weeks. It never looked like it would be able to close, but in time, it did.
In our relationships with God and others, we have many opportunities to practice healing. I find that it is often easier to just let emotional “wounds” heal the quick way. My natural tendency is to avoid conflict, so I would rather take the quick healing, even if it leaves a bigger scar on the relationship. I wonder what tender care would do for those moments? I think reconciliation is like this—an open baring of our wounds to allow a slow and tender healing from our loving Creator. As I move through my life, I pray that I can nurture my wounds—both physical and emotional—with tender, loving healing.
Erin Gallawa
November 5, 2022—A Hidden World
This summer we traveled to Washington, DC and my girls got their first experience using the underground metro. It was fun to watch them learn to love underground transportation as much as I do. Obviously, I love the convenience of travelling by metro, but that isn’t what I love most. I am always most amazed with the idea that there is an entire world below the earth’s surface. Beneath the feet of millions of people around the world, there are tunnels and trains and people, an entire transportation metropolis that is dynamic and alive! Yet from above, it is easy to forget that it exists. We’ve all heard not to judge a book by its cover, but the idea of an entire transportation ecosystem below my feet really challenges me to look beyond what is in front of me. Behind the walls of every home, inside the cover of every book, under the ground of major cities, and deep within the heart of every person, is an entire world that we cannot see. I pray that my mind and heart always be open to seeing what God has placed before me!
Erin Gallawa
November 6, 2022—Singing
My children’s theater program recently had a singing class for adults. I joined, excited to sing again after 20 years away from any real singing experience. What I didn’t know is that the class was preparing us to sing an audition song! By the end of the 6-week program, we were encouraged to stand in front of the entire group and sing as if we were auditioning for a show. The night we sang, I was overcome with a feeling of awe in the presence of these women. With one exception, there were no professionally trained singers. We were just a group of middle-aged moms with a joy for singing, brought together by the shared passion of our children. One by one, the women stood up and courageously sang. There were wonderful singers and nervous singers and singers who would not make eye contact. There were forgotten words and some flat notes. I was humbled and blessed to be present to such vulnerability. These women who were previously strangers to me had become my community. In that community we found a place to safely stand up and share our voice.
I believe that God intended for us to live in community with one another, where our gifts can be shared and we are safe to be ourselves. I am grateful for the many communities in my life, including my new singing community and the one here at SS Peter and Paul, where I have always been free to be me!
Erin Gallawa
Reflections for Oct. 24-30, 2022
October 24, 2022 - Cooking
Those who know me know I love to cook but I am not sure if they know why I love to cook. I enjoy food and the flavors one can create in making a meal, but it is about the joy that a well-cooked meal brings to people. Gathering at a table with friends and family sharing a meal together is what it is all about. Cooking the recipes that have been handed down through the family helps keep alive the memories of our loved ones in our hearts. And when learning to cook a dish from another culture and enjoying their food, we experience their culture. Cooking can also bring together total strangers. One time we were at Boeger Winery for a shrimp boil. There were about 50 or more people all together at this long table. We were eating and talking with strangers and at the end we were no longer strangers. That is what sharing a meal does. Jesus knew that gathering to share a meal is so important to us not only to receive Him for our spiritual nourishment but to connect us together as a family of God. No matter where you are you can go to Mass and share the Eucharistic meal together and be part of that family.
Kurt Peterson
October 25, 2022 – Special Powers
The popular series “Stranger Things” is about a secret government funded facility that was developing children to have special powers. The children are known by their numbers. 11 is a young girl who escapes from the facility and is befriended and protected by a small group of kids from the nearby town. It is through her friendship with these kids that she learns how to control her powers and understand the meaning of love. Before she escaped something happened where she, through her anger, created a breach between our world and what is called the Upside Down. It is a dark parallel of our world that is now trying to take our world over. Through the course of the series 11 learns that she can use her powers to repair the breach and send back the evil to the Upside-Down world.
Like 11 we have done things in our past that have created a breach or wound, which we call sin, that allows darkness to come into our world. Unlike 11 we do not have special powers, but we do have something greater, we have Christ living in us. And it is through the Holy Spirit that our wounds are healed. It is through us asking for forgiveness that we push the darkness back into the void and again live in the light.
Kurt Peterson
October 26, 2022 – Remembrance
There is a song we sing at 5:00 Sunday called Remembrance by Matt Maher. It is a beautiful song with some great imagery. It reminds us that our faith, especially during Mass, is not passive but very much active. We may be sitting but we are mentally and spiritually moving through the Mass until we have reached our goal, the Eucharist. I ask all of you to take the time to listen to the words, especially the refrain.
When we remember you – our remembrance leads us to worship
And as we worship you – our worship leads to communion
We respond to your invitation – We remember you
It is through our full participation that the Holy Spirit leads us forward into a deeper commitment to Christ. And it is in coming together as a community of believers that we accept His invitation to be fed by His Body and Blood, preparing us to take up His call to go out into the world just as the apostles and others have done for over 2,000 years. To spread the Gospel to the ends of the earth. Or at least Placer County.
Kurt Peterson
October 27, 2022– What Came First?
I saw this sign in front of a Christian church “We believe in the Bible because of God, not that we believe in God because of the Bible.” I had to ponder that for a while to understand what that meant. For me it is comes down to the question of what came first. I know for me my belief in God started as a small quiet whisper. While I was in college taking classes in psychology, botany, and oceanography I was learning the intricate nature of our minds and how complex nature was. I started to realize that everything today could not be an outgrowth of random acts. Nature is so intricate and the conditions for many things in nature to occur must be so precise that there had to be some kind of creative design. It was that realization that started my search for God and in reading the Bible I began to understand who God was. But it took my relationship with my wife, children, and my church community to help me understand what my role is in being part of the Body of Christ. My faith did not begin from reading the Bible; it first began with the quiet whispering of an inner self.
Kurt Peterson
October 28, 2022 – Good or Bad
People say we do not listen to each other anymore, but I am not sure how often we ever have. When looking at human history, we can see that we are not normally in the mode of listening to each other which results in wars, social and religious persecution, slavery and much more. However, there are those times throughout our history when we try to understand each other. That is what Lincoln meant when he implored us to act on “the better angels of our nature”. Recently on CBS’s Sunday Morning there was a segment about a group called “Braver Angels” that brings conservatives and liberals together to talk about the division. At the end of these meetings both sides leave with at least an understanding of the other and many leave with new friendships because they see each other as loving people and someone they care about. They are no longer “them” or “those” but Jim or Jane. There isn’t a slogan or dogma on the other side but a person. A person who has dreams, goals, longings, and pain just like you or me. I never really understood what Jesus meant when He told us to love our enemy but maybe this is what it means. To love someone, I need to first know them and when I know them then they no longer are the enemy.
Kurt Peterson
October 29, 2022 – The Shortest Sentence in the Bible
Did you know there is one sentence in the Bible that only has two words? It appears in the Gospel of John. Jesus is with his disciples when he hears about the death of his friend Lazarus. Jesus stays in place for 2 more days before they go to the family of Mary and Martha. When Jesus and the apostles get there, He sees how distraught Mary and the people are and scripture says, “He was deeply moved and troubled in spirit.” They took Jesus to where Lazarus was laid and in John 11:35 it says, “He wept.” Even the King of Kings who has been from the beginning of time wept. I think this is one of the most comforting passages in the Bible for me. We always talk about how Jesus came to save us and how when He will come again, and we will all live in Glory. But it is that one act where Jesus wept that is so meaningful. He did not weep for Lazarus because he was going to raise him from the dead. He wept for those that were hurting because he was hurting to. Even though Jesus knows the outcome, He still feels our hurt and weeps alongside us. He gets it and I know when I am in sorrow and grief, He is next to me and He weeps!
Kurt Peterson
October 30, 2022 – The Sound of Music
I recently watched a documentary called “The Sound of 007”. It is a fascinating documentary on how the original theme began and how well know it is. In practically any place in the world when people hear the first few chords it congers up the images of 007. Movies would not be as emotional as they are without the musical soundtrack. This is the same for Mass. The songs that are chosen by the music leader are meant to carry the theme for the Mass. The songs connect us to the readings and the message that is meant to be shared. I have had many people tell me how the music we play creates such emotion in them. For me one of the most incredible changes from the second Vatican Council was opening the Mass to be in the people’s language. I can get lost in hearing the readings and listening to the music. My worship becomes alive and there are so many different styles of music to choose from. So the next time you come to Mass I invite you to open your ears and heart and be drawn into the words and music of our faith.
Kurt Peterson
Reflections for Oct. 17-23, 2022
October 17, 2022 - ’Be Rich in What Matters to God’ (Ref. LK 12:13-21)
The context: Someone in the crowd approached Jesus asking to be an arbitrator. Then Jesus spoke to them the parable of the rich fool, urging them to guard against all greed.
I am writing this reflection while I am on the holy ground of Assisi reflecting on Francis who left everything to be rich in God. He found his richness for the rest of his life in others and in the universe. Francis was able to see the glory of God in every creature.
Whenever I read the parable of the greedy man, I laugh at the punchline. At the same time, I wonder, “What am I possessing which is not rich in the eyes of God? What do I keep for myself and am unwilling to share with others?” Sometimes, I realize I am not different from the rich fool. Though I know everything I have is transitory and for helping in the ministry, (for example, a vehicle) at times I find myself holding on to my talents and belongings which I should be sharing with the Lord and His people. We are blessed to be a blessing in the life of others. Keeping these possessions, whether they are talents or treasure, to oneself hinders the flow of grace into my life and I can fail to reflect on the generous nature of God.
Bony
October 18, 2022 - Feast of St. Luke, Evangelist. ‘We Are Sent Out with a Mission’ (Ref. LK 10:1-9)
Jesus sent out 72 disciples in pairs with a mission of peace, curing the sick and proclaiming ‘the Kingdom of God is at hand for you’.
In this commissioning Jesus urged them not to be focused on themselves (they were asked to carry only very limited needed items) but to focus on the mission – being there for others. This is the Christ-mission given to every one of us as well; just as Jesus was given it from God the Father. God empowers us with his grace to fulfill this mission and we bring glory to his name (Mt.5: 16). We are his humble servants doing God’s will. Remember that in LK 10/20 when these disciples later enthusiastically reported to Jesus about their mission, Jesus warns them not to take credit for their actions. He assures them that their reward is in Heaven.
There is a temptation as a priest serving the parish as a leader to claim the credit for a good parish for oneself. Lord, forgive me the times I looked at these achievements as my own gain, when all of it was yours. Remind me that I am called to serve, (Mt. 20: 28), and give glory and honor in all I do, to you alone.
Bony
October 19, 2022 - The Unexpected Hour and Prudent Servant (Ref. LK 12:39-48)
Context: Jesus told his disciples to be prepared to receive the Son of Man anytime. Peter asked whether it is just for them or everyone and Jesus gave the parable of the prudent and imprudent stewards.
Yes, it is for all of us. Do we need to be reminded about preparedness? Do we not belong to him always? Our baptism comes with a responsibility for readiness which I forget sometimes in life. That readiness is a personal communion with Christ that leads to a responsibility to serve faithfully the people entrusted to me. A responsibility to others comes from our communion with them in Christ. And God rewarded the prudent servant by giving him charge of everything.
I am aware of the responsibility that comes with Baptism and I am constantly reminded of the responsibility of ministerial priesthood; that is, being available for the people entrusted to me for pastoral care. It is my grave responsibility to be ready to serve faithfully and prudently.
For me, being a prudent steward means ‘being true to yourself and to others’ - How about for you?
Bony
October 20, 2022 - ‘The Anguish’ (Ref. LK 12:49-53)
“There is a Baptism with which I must be baptized, and how great is my anguish until it is accomplished!” (V.50)
The ‘Baptism’ that Jesus mentions here is his death - that is his entrusted mission - the divine call, the saving act, a sacrifice for the salvation of the world. Then, by expressing the intense feeling of distress he manifests his true human nature. ‘The anguish’ is not mere worries, rather, I think, it is mixed feelings of anxious waiting and a hope of fulfillment. Many of us may have experienced this in our lives. For example, when I hear about a surgery for anyone I know, I have the same feeling that the patient has, and the surgeon has. My mother and my siblings experienced it when Dad’s leg was amputated; we all went through the anguish, but later there was joy when Dad was with us for another ten healthy years.
I may feel tormented by small and big situations in life. But the greatest anguish I have is like St. Augustine, “You have made us for yourself, O Lord, and our hearts are restless until they rest in you.” Guide me Lord to serve you with my whole heart.
Bony
October 21, 2022 ‘Interpret the Present Time’ (Ref. LK 12:54-59)
Context: Jesus indicated his generations’ ability to read the signs of weather and seasons but they were unable to interpret the present time, to judge for themselves what is right.
At first His followers failed to interpret the meaning of the presence of Christ himself. And they failed to interpret his message of conversion. How do I interpret our present time? Is there Christ in every moment of my life? He is our strength and power to love and to be merciful. But we live in a world where we are vulnerable to manipulation of life values. The world may offer us values that appear to be moral and ethical, and have the potential to draw us away from Christian values.
Let me keep the values of Christ intact that I may not be infiltrated by inclinations - political, social, cultural, etc. Lord, keep my eyes and ears open to see and hear only the truth, and grant us all the wisdom to read the present times.
Bony
October 22, 2022 Patient Gardner and Barren Fig Tree (Ref. LK 13:1-19)
The context: Referring to the two tragedies Jesus teaches the crowd that any suffering by external forces are not the consequences of sin. Calling for redemption He insists on repentance and gives this parable depicting the patient and merciful God.
This parable gives a hope of redemption. The call for repentance is always for the love-reunion and should not be due to fear of punishment. This reflects our relationship with God. Just as the gardener in the parable has a heart for the tree and wants to give it a chance to bear fruit, so God is the same with us. The tree has to respond to His compassionate heart and produce the fruit of love.
What really happens in my spiritual life is that I am relaxed, taking for granted the goodness of the Lord and I fall into habitual sins. It blocks me from experiencing the compassionate heart of God and I am not able to produce good fruits. I need to act instantly with repentance to embrace Him. Lord, thank you for your patience and giving me an opportunity to correct my life. Help me to remain in you and to bear much fruit (Jn 15: 5)
Bony
October 23, 2022 Tax Collector Attitude (Ref. LK 18:9-14)
Context: Jesus addressed the parable of a pharisee and tax collector praying in the temple area to those who were convinced of their own righteousness and despised everyone else. The pharisee boasts in prayer and despises others whereas the tax collector, bent down, prays for mercy.
Humble submission to God justifies the tax collector. In a later chapter Jesus chooses to stay in the home of Zacchaeus, another tax collector who sincerely repents. All I want is the attitude of these tax collectors. The posture, the focus, the humble submission, the true feeling of unworthiness and prayer for mercy are really an inspiration and model for all of us.
I have to confess, though I do not despise anyone, my eyes wander around the church during Mass. Sometimes I am displeased by someone’s action, questioning myself if that person is praying or not. Who am I to judge? After all, I am an unworthy person called to serve His people. And I am constantly inspired by the humility and devoutness of my parishioners.
Lord, I want to be your humble and devout child, a servant committed to serve.
Bony
Reflections for Oct. 10-16, 2022
October 10, 2022 - Forget?
I have to admit that there are times when I am either lazy or tired and I fall into bed without reviewing my day and thanking God for what has gone on. That goes for other times of the day as well. Numerous religious, spiritual counselors and friends remind me that there is a primacy involved throughout the day, nay, through all of life to acknowledge just how much I owe God. From my first waking breath to that last sigh of relaxation at night it is a duty to thank God for life and all of His gifts. Sister Joan Chittister reminds me that I may forget God at times, but that God does not forget me. I exist not only because of my Mom and Dad but because God was a part of the equation also. So the question is, what do I do about my forget- fulness? Practice! My dear departed Mom-in-law was a great example because she prayed about absolutely everything. She told me that as soon as she opened her eyes in the morning she would thank God for giving her another day (but later in her life she said she questioned God about why she was still around). And then she’d thank God not only for the good things of life but also the challenges she encountered. So the answer to my question is indeed to do as she did and make it a habit to pray always. To see God as a partner, or rather, to be God’s partner. And so I remind myself: Don’t forget.
Deacon David
October 11, 2022 – Pope John XXIII
At Mass today Saint Pope John XXIII was remembered and memorialized. He was Pope when I was accepted for baptism in the Catholic Church in 1960. At the time I was accepted the Mass was still in Latin, everyone brought their own missal to read at Mass and Communion happened while kneeling at the altar rail, all very impersonal. Since I had nothing to compare my experience with, I was gratified with the Pope’s aggiornamento, “…bringing the church up to date.” I wasn’t the only one who appreciated him as his encyclical Pacem in Terris (Peace on Earth) was widely appreciated not only amongst Catholics but also by people of other or no religion. He was a sort of model for me given his simple lifestyle and his expressed love for all people, not just the powerful or rich. Some said that he was a father figure to the world and it is said that he lived such a simple life that when he died his personal fortune willed each of his family members the sum of $20.00. This simple man brought openness to the Catholic Church that included possibilities for lay Catholics to live, not just practice, our faith. Jane and I were able to go into the world as lay missionaries to share our gifts and talents because of the guidance of Pope John XXIII. Our present Pope carries on in that same manner. I remind myself to open up the doors and windows and don’t surprised at who or what comes in.
Deacon David
October 12, 2022 - Autumn
A couple of weeks ago, September 21st, brought a change of season. The weather can’t make up its mind whether to be hot or mild, rainy or dry but I do enjoy the chance to go onto our patio and sit without getting fried. The oak trees are shedding more than usual and the deciduous trees shower more leaves so that our green waste container will be full several times a month instead of empty most of the time. The change of season puts me in mind of the season of my own life, just as God designed it. Just as the sun brought new growth to the vegetation in spring and summer, so too with me. The pale of my skin responded to the sun’s rays tanning me a bit though I have to say that my hair color didn’t respond to photosynthesis and stayed white. Well, the tan is fading and I’ve retired my shorts for long legged jeans and will soon be wearing warm shirts. All of this is just the outside of me. I’ve noticed my inside responding similarly, more energy in the spring and slowing down some, taking the time to rest and recuperate in the fall just as the foliage does. Perhaps it is this time of year that God gives us the opportunity to realize the seasons of our lives and acknowledge the changes we experience as we note that the sap doesn’t rise as quickly as it once did…and that’s okay since it is surely God’s plan for us.
Deacon David
October 13, 2022 - Noise
A couple of months ago a large plot of land in our neighborhood was sold to a housing developer. Since then the ground has been shaking with the rumble of giant earthmoving machines tearing down many old growth oak trees and digging up the underlying granite rock with the aim to level homesites for construction. The progress has been slow and exceedingly noisy, sometimes six days a week. This of course gets me to think about the noise of my own life. I started out pretty raw with the same sort of hard rock substrata requiring much work to get ready for development. It hasn’t been a quiet process. At the beginning I was sure that I was fine “as is” but I was finally persuaded that my hard head needed some adjustment. That groundwork took not just six days a week but every day. Those who helped with the groundwork put up with a lot of noise stemming from my ignorance. I admit that there is still noise in me that needs the quiet work of leveling the ground of my heart and soul. I think back on all of the people, lay and religious, who endured the noise of my life and helped me to find that quiet place inside myself to build a life that can withstand the noise of the world.
Deacon David
October 14, 2022 - Work
Once again I find myself quoting Sister Joan Chittister as my starting point: “Good work is a human being’s contribution to the development of humankind and fulfilment of the universe”. My first thought upon reading this is that it no longer applies as I’ve been retired from my “work” for twenty-two years. And when I did my work I considered it a “…contribution to the development of….” I was doing something that was needed to mend and reintroduce people to a society from which they’d been removed due to unlawful behavior. But whoa, did finishing that work exempt me from continuing to relate with others, others who were for some reason not a viable or visible part of the community? Honestly it took me some time to realize that with the ending of paid employment I was, as a follower of Jesus, still obliged to share whatever experience or expertise I’d gained throughout life. I only had to look around me, particularly in the parish, to witness people, retired or not, who were giving of themselves to better others. The ministries and activities developed and pursued demonstrated to me the truth of Sister Joan’s quote. Doing, or rather, being a follower of Jesus doesn’t include the idea of “retirement”. Each of us signs up for life, maybe not so inclusive of “…the universe” but certainly for the space we inhabit in it.
Deacon David
October 15, 2022 - Light
The song goes “..you are the light of the world”. I enjoy hearing and singing that song but sometimes I don’t practice it. When I think of the biblical admonition NOT to hide my light under a bushel basket I ask: what, why, how? You and I know, through our sacramental baptism and confirmation, that we have been blessed with a certain glow, a light that we are obliged to share as followers of Jesus. When was the last time I can say that I did that? Well, maybe at Mass at the sign of peace. Maybe I was nice enough to let someone go first in the parking lot. It pleases me when, either at church or in the community, someone graces me with a smile or a word of recognition. It feels so good. So maybe that is the simple answer to my question. Give what I’ve got to lift up another person who may not be recognized or is in need of a kind word. It doesn’t have to be “religious” but it has to be sincere. We have been endowed with a special light, a God given light, that is to be shared out of love with everyone. Lord, please take me out from under the bushel basket.
Deacon David
October 16, 2022 - Persist
I sometimes hear people say, and sometimes I myself ask, why me? There are many people who suffer, some of whom ask that question. There are others who endure and remain silent. In today’s scripture readings at Mass we are told about two instances of persistence. In the first from Exodus, we are told about a war between tribes and how the Jews prevailed because Moses, with the help of others, was able physically to hold his arms up for an entire day. So Moses, with the help of Aaron and Hur, kept the staff of God raised up so that Joshua and his army would win the war. In the gospel reading from Luke, Jesus relates a parable that is closer to what I can understand. The story involves an unjust Judge and a widow who went to the judge seeking justice. Right away we’re made aware the judge was trying to ignore the widow, probably because she didn’t try to bribe him, but finally thought she might physically harm him. She was persistent just as Moses was. The lesson Jesus taught is that our prayers, as His chosen ones, should continue day and night. God promises justice but asks the question “But when the Son of Man comes, will he find faith on earth?” I must seek justice without ceasing and know that faith will be answered.
Deacon David
Reflections for Oct. 3-9, 2022
October 3, 2022 - The Grace in Giving
In the hospital stay immediately following my car accident, I was lovingly cared for by many skilled nurses. I began to notice that after working with me, each nurse said “thank you” often before I could say it! This seemed so odd, because it seemed that the situation was backwards… I was the one that should be thanking them! After reflecting on this, I realized that as humans we are created to live in community and when people graciously receive our gifts of time and treasure, we are grateful for the opportunity to make a difference.
Jesus gave us a wonderful example. He selflessly gave his body and blood in the eucharist as gift to us. This is the ultimate “thank you” to his followers.
Over the years, I have been so grateful for the opportunity to serve this parish. To those whom I have served in some way, thank you!
Darcy Wharton
October 4, 2022 - In Sickness and in Health
Like so many others, my husband and I said the words quickly at our wedding ceremony. We promised “to be true in good times and bad, in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer, ‘till death do us part.” Did we really know what we were saying? We thought we did!
I gradually discovered that the commitment to be there for one another in sickness and in health is a true gift. When I came home from the hospital recently, I had no use of one arm and I was also in a neck brace. In the first week or so, I needed assistance in almost every way, from meal preparation, to showering and dressing. Knowing that I enjoyed blow drying and curling my hair each day, my husband graciously agreed to use a curling iron to style my hair so I could feel more “normal”. This simple act made me smile and warmed my heart. I don’t think either of us thought there would come a day when he would be my hair stylist, but our expectations rarely meet the reality of life.
Praise God for all of the supportive partners in our lives!
Darcy Wharton
October 5, 2022 - The Meaning of Suffering
Why does God allow suffering? Some have said that the issue of why there is suffering is perhaps the most difficult spiritual question. I know people who have lost their faith because they could not understand why God allowed life-threatening illnesses or a criminal act to take the life of a loved one.
I, too, have struggled to find answers to the question of suffering. However, as I heard once from Fr. Brendan McGuire, “As I go through life, I understand God less but have experienced God more.” This makes so much sense to me!
In the times of my deepest suffering (physical or emotional), I have intensely felt the presence of God. Perhaps it’s because when life rolls along without trouble, I can too easily forget my reliance on God. When life shakes me up a bit and questions arise, it can be the perfect time to turn again to God for support.
Darcy Wharton
October 6, 2022 - L’Chaim- To Life!
After my accident, I discovered that I became even more grateful for the gift of life. Time with friends and family has become even more precious and it seems more important than ever to show my gratitude because as other writers have mentioned, we never know how long any of us will be on this earth.
My husband and I have become friends with our neighbors at our vacation home in Truckee. The couple shares many of our same values and we always enjoy our dinners together. During a recent visit with them, the husband (who is Jewish) offered the toast “L’Chaim” which means “to life. This Hebrew exclamation has apparently been used for 2,000 years and although I’ve heard that phrase countless times in the past, it now takes on special meaning.
So the next time you raise your glass, join me in offering a toast to “L’Chaim”…to life!
Darcy Wharton
October 7, 2022 - No Pain, No Gain
No doubt you have heard the phrase, “no pain, no gain. I typically had heard the phrase in relation to pushing oneself to greater athletic ability. I honestly tended to resist the concept because I did not want to experience unnecessary pain. After all, who wants more pain in life?
As a result of the physical therapy required after my accident, that phrase has taken on new meaning. I am only able to progress in the use of my arm after uncomfortable and sometimes painful physical therapy and the subsequent exercises at home. There truly is no gain without pain. In a concrete way, I am able to see the results of leaning into the pain instead of avoiding it.
Perhaps when there is pain in my spiritual life, I will remember that Jesus set the perfect example. The pain of the cross was followed by the resurrection. As a baptized Christian, I can confidently trust the process.
Darcy Wharton
October 8, 2022 - Wrapped in Prayer
A few years ago, I was asked to facilitate a retreat for women who attend the First United Methodist Church in Loomis. It was a wonderful experience and the retreat was enhanced by its setting at Zephyr Cove in Nevada. I felt a connection with these women in a very short period of time, recognizing our unity in Christ.
Imagine my surprise when I began receiving get well cards in the mail after my accident from some of these women! After hearing about my situation I immediately was included in a prayer chain. When I heard about it, my heart was warmed.
Then a couple of weeks later, one of the women (who is a friend of mine) arrived to my office with a present. The prayer shawl ministry had made me a prayer shawl. Several women prayed over their crochet hooks and the yarn, and held me in prayer while they made me a crocheted blanket – a visible sign that I was “wrapped in prayer”.
This gift is so meaningful to me, because it reminds me that prayer truly unites us all. The boundaries of religion do not impede the love of God from shining through.
Thank you, Lord, for the gift of prayer.
Darcy Wharton
October 9, 2022 - Your Faith Has Saved You
In the gospel story of the ten lepers (and the one who returns to give thanks), we discover that only one of the lepers returns to give thanks. There is a line in that story that states, “one of them, realizing he had been healed, returned, glorifying God in a loud voice.”
A few questions arise for me. How did the other nine not know they were healed? What was it in the experience of the one leper that allowed him to realize that he had been healed? Although I don’t know for sure, I have a sense that he was a person who already was aware of God’s work in his life and could detect subtle shifts in the relationship. If you have ever truly felt God’s healing within you, then you can relate to this man. The only appropriate response is to “glorify God in a loud voice”.
I would like to believe that the physical healing of the other nine lepers was the beginning of their faith journeys. For the one who had journeyed with God and recognized God’s healing, Jesus said, “Stand up and go, your faith has healed you.”
What a generous God we have that meets us along the road and offers healing! May I in turn, as the hands and feet of Christ, offer a healing presence to all those in need.
Darcy Wharton
Reflections for Sept. 26-Oct. 2, 2022
September 26, 2022 – Peaks and Valleys
Many years ago, while on retreat I was invited to complete a “life-graph” exercise, noting the moments in my life when I felt closest to God and the times when I felt farthest from God. This exercise was tricky though, because it wasn’t simply about listing the happiest or hardest times. In particular, I was called to examine a painful moment in my life when my husband and I suffered a miscarriage in our first pregnancy. During this time, I remember being surprised by the fact that I wasn’t angry at God, and I didn’t feel far away from Him. In fact, I felt God closer than I ever had before - He was grieving right along with us, because he had lost a child too!
It was through this exercise though, that I learned what it meant to say that “Our God of the mountain is also our God of the valley.” This notion certainly doesn’t take away our suffering, or make it less confusing, but it helped me find God in the midst of it all. I was able to feel an intimacy with a God who is not to blame for the suffering, but rather a God who can hold me and accompany me in my valleys.
-Katie Maynard
September 27, 2022 – More Hugs
A long time ago, I was given a “Hug Coupon” by someone in my teenage years, and I recently found it in the zipper pocket of an old purse. In that moment, it felt as though I had hit the jackpot, and I knew my girls were going to love the coupon. Although they were preoccupied at the moment when I went to share the news, the moment I placed the coupon in front of them, they stopped to read the coupon…looked up at me with big smiling eyes and stopped whatever they were doing to give me a big hug.
The next thing I knew, one of our daughters was making a handful of hug coupons for her dad on Father’s Day, because she knew this was something too good not to be shared! We could all use a hug coupon, because what it really affords us is the permission to stop what we are doing and simply embrace…connect…and let love wash over us.
-Katie Maynard
September 28, 2022 – Okay Google
A couple of years ago, we welcomed a “Google Home” into our household, and life will never be the same. My daughters now have them in their bedrooms, and it’s been fun to hear them ask Google to play their favorite songs, ask about the weather, or to set an alarm. I say that cautiously, because we have also found ourselves frustrated with Google when it just can’t get it right: it plays the wrong song, or it “can’t understand” our request, or it blares the alarm at full volume. Google also seems to be picky depending on whose room I happen to be in: for example, Evelyn’s Google seems to only want to listen to her voice and needs to hear a “please” (which I actually love).
Now, God is not like a Google Home, but it made me think about supplication in prayer. My spiritual director used to say that “supplication, asking, even begging for what we most need cannot help but change us.” It reminds us of our dependence on God and it is from that place of humility that we are changed. I am often reluctant to pray this way, because it takes courage to ask for what I really need!
It’s true that God might have a different song in mind, and it might be at 80% volume…but unlike Google, God already knows what I need before I ask, God takes me as I am, I don’t have to get the wording right, and He is not picky about my requests.
-Katie Maynard
September 29, 2022 – Warmth
I learned the comfort of warmth from my mother as she would always wipe our hands and faces with a warm washcloth. A cold washcloth or wipe would not suffice, because she knew that the warmth would bring us comfort. She has also been known to throw a towel in the dryer for my kids (and me) before coming out of the shower, and although I am not always as good about the warm washcloths, I have tried to share some of this warmth with my own children. Whenever my girls are around for a fresh load of sheets and towels to come out of the dryer, I will often call out “Warm Laundry Dump!” and the girls will run to the couch where I proceed to dump the laundry out over top of them. It doesn’t matter what they are doing or how hot it is outside, that warmth is comforting to them, and they run to get it!
It makes me think how I can bring warmth to others, not necessarily in the form of warm linens, but in the warmth of my words, and my actions. Warm it up!
-Katie Maynard
September 30, 2022 – Shake the Dust
“Whoever will not receive you or listen to your words – go outside that house or town and shake the dust from your feet” (Matthew 10:14).
My father, who happens to be the wisest man I know, recently offered these words to me when I was struggling with a personal relationship. These words contained both solace and challenge for me - nudging me towards a freedom that would come from letting go.
In Matthew’s gospel narrative, Jesus emboldened his disciples in their good work, but also cautioned them not to have their peace taken away from them. If they did not encounter a sense of welcome or invitation, then they were encouraged to not only leave the town, but to shake the dust from their feet. The shaking of the dust feels like the most challenging part, because it’s about true surrender…and that is really hard for me!
Lord, I pray for the grace to meet people where they are, and the courage to step back, shake off the dust and keep walking when necessary.
-Katie Maynard
October 1, 2022 – Namaste
Recently, as we have been playing video games as a family, I discovered the power of the “yoga lady” as a Nintendo Wii character. At first it was fun to laugh as she approached her battles with a front flip and a tree pose, but it became no laughing matter as she began to dominate her challenges!
Now, in my own experience of yoga, I have not always been able to identify with the strength of this Nintendo yoga character. In my first practices, I mostly felt wobbly in my poses and struggled to find dignity as I would lose my balance, or fall on my face during a plank. Admittedly, in trying to greet the light in others (namaste), my own light felt a bit unsteady.
Eventually, I found that strength in yoga comes through patience and repetition, and perhaps more importantly through the breath. It feels true in life that strength often requires some stages of wobbliness, before our light finds its power.
-Katie Maynard
October 2, 2022 – The Altar
My daughter Noelle is high energy, and her speed in life is fast, but those who have the fortune of knowing her, know that she brings joy to everyone she meets (I’m biased I know). With this energy though, she can sometimes struggle with a lack of focus as she rushes through tasks. The interesting thing however, is that this does not appear to be her limitation as an altar server.
I am in awe when she serves at the altar because she is not afraid. She is laser-focused, knows exactly what comes next, and has become a leader in a very short amount of time. It is beautiful that she has found peace in the movement of the ritual and liturgy through her service. I suppose I should not be surprised that being on the altar brings about focus and clarity for her, as she sets and serves the table of the Lord.
-Katie Maynard
Reflections for Sept. 19-25, 2022
September 19, 2022 – Empty Spaces
The philosopher Emanual Kant argues that we are born with a predisposition to experience things through the filter of time and three-dimensional space. It’s just the way humans are wired; we cannot experience anything other than that. Science is based on this wiring and allows us to know a lot about the world, but it cannot tell us the reality of what exists in empty space.
I had assumed that this empty space was actually empty. Oh I knew there were invisible things like dust mites, germs, and gases that make up “air”, but the idea that there could be other things I am incapable of knowing or identifying in the aisle right beside me was ridiculous. Then I thought about God! The Baltimore Catechism taught me that God is everywhere. I never doubted that, but I had somehow cheapened that belief to mean that He was over and above me, present but somehow at a distance. The idea that God was existing literally in that aisle next to me, was new. I had often felt His presence but that was an awareness in me, not a reality about the space next to me. Then I learned that the cells in our bodies also have lots of empty space in them. Could God be there also, actually residing in the very cells that make up who I am? Of course He is, because He is everywhere! He is the God of empty spaces.
Jane Haproff
September 20, 2022 - The Body
During last week’s severe weather conditions David and I closed ourselves up in our air- conditioned house and binge watched reruns of hospital dramas. Wow! There are so many things that can go wrong with the body. I thought about St. Paul referring to the Church as the Mystical Body of Christ and wondered why he chose that particular metaphor. The body is certainly a unity of many differing parts each with different abilities and purposes, which sounds like the Church. But some of these parts are so hidden that I never even pay attention to them. I want to explore the spiritual significance of some of these hidden activities of the body. For example, I rarely, if ever think about my spleen or pancreas, organs that filter my blood, clean out old cells and fight infection to name just a few of their activities. Nor do I think about my hypothalamus that works as a control center keeping my body in a stable state. These organs when healthy do this all the time, whether I’m awake or asleep or want them to or not. The reasoning ability that I treasure so much and which I use to govern my conscious choices is helpless here. There is something both frightening and awe-inspiring about this for me. And it places me squarely in the presence of God who designed this wonderous machine. There He is… in the very core of my physical existence working away non-stop trying to keep me safe, and helping me function until he calls me home.
Jane Haproff
September 21, 2022 – Compassion
As I think about the God who inhabits my very being, I am reminded of the dialogue between Bishop Tutu and the Dalai Lama captured in the film Mission: Joy. (on Amazon Prime!). One is Christian and the other Buddhist, but they both believe that we are wired for compassion, that it is part of what it means to be human. Once cultural influences are stripped away we discover that compassion remains. Because compassion is basic to our humanity we can only experience happiness and joy when we engage with each other at that level. Our culture teaches us that happiness is a bigger house, nicer car, more money, etc. But their message is that if we fail to connect with each other with justice and mercy, listening to and even forgiving those who hurt us we can never by happy. They both agreed that it isn’t easy. Compassion is like a muscle that must be strengthened through the exercise of prayer and meditation.
So, once again, I find something of God at work in me hidden at the cellular level: compassion. And once again I am directed to find strength in quiet time with the God who is apparently so much more present in my life than I imagined as that child devoutly praying to be a saint.
Jane Haproff
September 22, 2022 - Relationships
Weeks ago my friend found her partner dead on his bathroom floor. She and her partner were not married and did not live together. She was divorced. After her son was accidentally shot her husband was lost in a grief that cost them their marriage. She refused to seek an annulment because she believed they had had a sacramental marriage. And she would not remarry outside the church. She was nearly crushed again by the circumstances of this more recent death. She was angry at God. I attempted to console her, saying it is okay to be angry at God because often it’s those closest to us who can cause the most anger. She agreed with me and told me that after her son’s death she would go into the Church in the middle of the night (she was music director and had keys) sit in front of the tabernacle and scream at God, crying in anger.
I tell this story because it speaks to me about layers of relationship and where God is in all of it. My friend retained a kind of relationship to the ideal that God called her to in her marriage. She was present to her partner through his illness, bringing God’s presence and care to him. She trusted her relationship with God enough to rage at Him for these untimely deaths. Then while watching the Queen’s funeral on TV she heard words of comfort that spoke to her. As she began to weep, a soft rain fell and she felt a holy presence.
Jane Haproff
September 23, 2022 - Preferential Option for the Poor
The weather conditions of a week ago combined with the drought caused me to think about what it must be like to be poor. We live in air-conditioned comfort about five miles from the DeWitt Center where over one hundred unhoused people camp without water or shade. An air-conditioned Welcome Center is about a mile from the encampment where bottles of water, a TV and charging stations are available. No showers or laundry facilities. The sheriff patrols regularly directing people to mental health and probation services, but the county does not offer more at the actual campsite worrying that might become permanent and offend the neighbors.
In the early 70’s the Church adopted a position that said when competing interests come into play, those solutions that favor the poor must be chosen because not only did Jesus model that for us, he chose to be one of the poor. So many gospel stories tell us that He is there in the lives of the poor…unhoused, dirty, thirsty, and neglected. So I wonder how do I personally live this preferential option for the poor? Do I choose policies that welcome Him into my neighborhood, or do I look the other way, offering prayers and charity, which is easy to do? I tell myself I’m a good person; I don’t rock the boat. I lector and write reflections, surely doing what God has asked of me. But please Lord, don’t ask me to welcome them (you) into my neighborhood!
Jane Haproff
September 24, 2022 - Memory(ies)
Our oldest son recently turned sixty. David and I decided to put together a memory book for him, each or us identifying our favorite memories of his growing up. It was difficult. There were easy memories of his early years. The memories got harder to recall in those middle years of junior high school and high school; years packed with children’s school events, sporting events, firsts jobs, proms, etc. All of the things you think you will never forget, but that get buried in the busyness of a large family. I grieved those lost memories.
As I think about the intensity of the feelings I had in trying to remember significant events for our son, I thought about God and what role memory might play with and for Him/Her. Scripture describes God has having emotions, such as joy, anger, love. He rejoices and is pleased and displeased. God knows everything about me, but does He attach those feelings to individual, specific events in my life? Does He remember when I was unkind to Maria in seventh grade? Or is His love so prevailing that it actually overrides specific memories so that God is just pure love in the end? I felt such intense love for my son, even though I could not recall all of the details of his life. I’m guessing that that’s just a whisper of the kind of love God has for me, loving and forgiving at the same time the totality in of who I am, and not dissecting my life event by event.
Jane Haproff
September 25, 2022 - Circularity
Recently Fr. Bony built a homily around how Jesus is the host at the Eucharistic feast where he provides the food that is His body and then sends us out to be no longer His guests but His presence in the world, commissioned to be hosts now to other people. Soon after that at another Mass as I heard the words of the Eucharistic Prayer I recognized another circular relationship. We entreat God to sanctify the gifts of bread and wine that we bring to the altar, then the words of consecration are said over them and they become the Body and Blood of Jesus. But this bread and wine is nothing but the ordinary work of our hands which is now God. Then Father offers Jesus to the Lord as a sacrifice. Jesus, Lord himself, is offered to the Lord; God offers Himself as sacrifice to Himself! I don’t think I ever fully realized what this all means. God takes the ordinariness of our life, blesses it and it becomes both spiritual food for us and sacrifice for us. All these words have been part of my vocabulary all of my life. But the reality of the meaning of what God has done for me is staggering. These circles of meaning say so much about how God must love us. I am left with the realization again: Lord I am not worthy.
Jane Haproff
Reflections for Sept, 12-18, 2022
September 12, 2022—The Chosen
At Confirmation in our parish a few weeks ago, the Bishop encouraged our 80+ confirmandi to read the Bible. I think a great addition to the Bishop’s thoughtful advice might be to encourage the confirmandi to also watch The Chosen. The Chosen is the first-ever multi-season TV series about the life of Christ. Two seasons have been released with a total of 7 planned.
A contributor to the Jesuit publication, America, wrote: “The church and the faithful need this show. But in all the … education that has formed my faith, it never occurred to me that the apostles had full lives with families, jobs, commitments, and challenges, just like I do—and that Jesus disrupts all of that when he arrives.”
When I was in formation to be a deacon, I had over three years of scripture study. So, at first, I was reluctant to watch another movie about the life of Christ. My wife, though, had never formally studied the Bible; and The Chosen provided a poignant perspective for her. Together we binge watched Seasons 1 and 2 in under two weeks. I found the series to be very faithful to the Gospels, but the stories were presented with some “creative license” to allow you to imagine that you were there. I found Jesus very human, so his decisions involved questioning and trust and doubt.
Many of the episodes brought tears to our eyes. Probably the most poignant was the conversion of Mary Magdalene. Watching this series allowed us to experience Christ and the Bible in a whole new way.
Bob Leathers
September 13, 2022—The Four Gifts
A few weeks ago, Cindy and I saw the play, The Four Gifts, based on the book with the same name by Fr. Joe Bradley, a priest in the Archdiocese of San Francisco. Presented at Hillbarn Theatre in Foster City, Fr. Joe was there himself for its final showing. Imagine being a happy and dedicated young priest who gave wonderful homilies (and inspired some of mine!), inspired his students, offered hope when needed, and loved the people he served, only to find out that you had a short time to live unless you received a heart transplant.
No one would ever have guessed Joe Bradley would become a priest. He was both an alcoholic and a drug addict. Regretfully, he gave drugs to a friend who was injured in a car crash and later died. Yet God called this man to be a priest.
God gifted Joe to (1) reclaim his faith, (2) become sober and be ordained a priest, (3) receive a new heart, and (4) have a new life.
Father Joe’s life offers me encouragement whenever I fall short. Recently, a friend confided that he lost his temper with his mom who has early onset dementia. I reminded him of the times I lost it with my own mom who also suffered from dementia. Since we are human, God can do nothing with us if we are perfect. No matter what our struggles are God calls us to new life whenever we fall short.
Bob Leathers
September 14, 2022—Eucharist as Paradox
When I was in diaconate formation, my canon law professor summed up the 1,752 Church canons as follows: If you are going to err, err on the side of charity. Pope Francis himself said as much in a recent interview, “What should a shepherd do? They must be a shepherd with God's style. And God's style is closeness, compassion and tenderness.”
As a Catholic, I believe our faith is full of paradoxes. For example, if you want to have life, you must be willing to carry your cross. The bread that becomes Eucharist is also a paradox: The bread is a source of joy, strength and nourishment, but to become bread, the kernels of wheat must be crushed.
Ron Rolheiser, OMI, is one of my favorite spiritual writers. Some years ago, he published a reflection on the Eucharist that really struck me: For some it is a celebration of reconciliation, a ritual that forgives and unites, for others unity and reconciliation are pre-conditions for its proper celebration. Another paradox! Perhaps there is truth in both.
Bob Leathers
September 15, 2022—Uncle Mike
When I was growing up in Miami, I lived in a 3-bedroom, one bath home with my parents, my grandmother, and my grandmother’s brother, Uncle Mike. Uncle Mike was my favorite uncle and he loved me as if I were his son. He never drove a car, so occasionally he’d take me on bus rides all over town. We even joked one day that we might take a Greyhound Bus ride all the way across the country to California!
As a young boy, I became pretty adept at putting on puppet shows, so Uncle Mike built a puppet stage for me that I could use with hand puppets as well as marionettes. When I was a bit older, because we had such a small house, Uncle Mike and I shared a room together. One day, I came home from school to learn that Uncle Mike had moved out of the house into his own apartment a couple of miles away, and this upset me and our family. Uncle Mike was also quite stubborn, a trait I’m afraid still runs in my family (including me, I’m told), because no amount of persuasion from my mother and grandmother convinced him to come back home. This experience never left me, but it was years later before I realized that Uncle Mike moved out of the house because he loved me and wanted me to have my own room in our small house. What a wonderful gift of self-less love!
Bob Leathers
September 16, 2022—Lewis and Clark
This summer, Cindy and I took a 7-day river cruise along the Snake and Columbia Rivers in the Pacific Northwest. We experienced beautiful scenery, great food, and outstanding service in a new river boat equipped with many amenities. During the cruise, we went through 8 locks and learned a great deal about the Pacific Northwest including about the explorers Meriwether Lewis and William Clark who with their crew were charged with discovering a path to the Pacific Ocean from St. Louis. The exploration spanned over two years in the early 1800s (during the presidency of Thomas Jefferson following the Louisiana Purchase).
On their expedition, Lewis and Clark and their crew endured many hardships including frigid weather, storms, hazardous terrain and hunger. They encountered and had to interact and communicate with many Native American tribes. I can’t help but imagine how their grit, determination and courage paved the way for the generations that followed them, including Cindy and me on a relaxing river cruise through 8 locks.
From time to time, we sing the hymn, “Go Make a Difference,” at our Sunday masses. Probably without knowing it, Lewis and Clark and their expeditionary team made a difference. God put them in the right place at the right time and with the right gifts and skills, and we are the beneficiaries who get to enjoy the fruits of their efforts.
Bob Leathers
September 17, 2022—World’s Greatest Rosary Collection
Believe it or not, the world’s largest rosary collection is not in a museum at the Vatican, but in the Spiritual Quest Gallery of the Columbia Gorge Interpretative Center in Stevenson, Washington. Cindy and I toured the Center during a stop on our river cruise along the Columbia River this summer.
Nearly 4,000 rosaries are displayed along with other religious artifacts associated with Pacific Northwest history. A few of the rosaries have historical significance including one donated by President John F. Kennedy which he may have used during World War II before he became president
The collection is attributed to Don Brown, who grew up and lived in the area. His devotion grew out of his confinement in a hospital with a severe attack of pneumonia. He observed that the rosaries were being worn by the Sisters of Mercy, and the rosaries inspired him to adopt the Catholic faith.
Seeing this magnificent collection gave me pause to reflect on my own collection of 5 or 6 rosaries, including a couple of finger rosaries. I’ve been through periods in my life where I’ve prayed the rosary daily and other times when I have not. The important thing I’ve realized, though, is to pray as you can and not as you can’t. At times, it’s easy to pray spontaneously; at other times, I need the repetitiveness of the prayers in the rosary. How I pray continues to evolve and I’ve come to realize that spending time with God—who always loves us—is what is most important.
Bob Leathers
September 18, 2022—Cursillo
At SS. Peter & Paul, we are very blessed to have a very active Cursillo group. Cursillo is a Spanish word for “short course in Christ.” This is my brief Cursillo story:
In 1977, two friends encouraged me to make a Cursillo weekend. I had first heard about Cursillo from my pastor, who established the Cursillo movement in South Florida. Witnessing how Cursillo made the faith of my two friends become alive made me want to attend one, and so they sponsored me.
The weekend itself was wonderful, but the experience the next day changed my life. On the Monday morning following Cursillo, April 18th, I drove to work in downtown Miami, parked the car at a meter, and then had an overwhelming experience of the presence of Christ. From this day forward, I went to Mass because I wanted to and not out of habit. For the 9 months following this experience, I spoke openly of my faith, and I was on cloud nine!
The Cursillo experience enlivened and deepened my faith. Another result was that my prayer life deepened, I began to study my faith, and I became more active in Church service. Ultimately, it led me to consider a call to become a deacon. Retreat experiences like Cursillo give us a chance to let God in and spend time with God, enable opportunities to experience the presence of Christ, and transform both us and the Church.
Bob Leathers
Reflections for Sept. 5-11, 2022
September 5, 2022 - Pruning & Gardening
I am not a gardener, but I enjoy experiencing a well landscaped piece of property. Recently I went to Butchart Gardens and took in all the amazing beauty that surrounded me. There was such a sense of peace that came over me as I walked around the grounds taking endless pictures. It inspired me to think of ways that maybe I could try gardening at home on a small scale. I desire to have some fresh food that I can grow on my own even if it is simple herbs or fruits that you plant in pots. What holds me back from moving forward with this desire is the need to prune and the potential for it not to work. The doubt of what if the plants die? What if there is no harvest? What if I don’t take the time to make sure the garden is well tended? My mind then returns to the luscious grounds at Butchart Gardens and I am in awe. I cannot even begin to fathom the amount of time and resources it takes to maintain the grounds there. I know my garden will look quite different and I am not opposed to that. I am held back with the doubt of investing time, energy, money into something and not getting a “return”. Oh, what if God thought of us like that?! God prunes us in ways we may not even realize and puts on our heart to go beyond what we thought possible. As we get ready to begin the season of Fall, I look forward to the beginning of the change of seasons, the leaves, and the eventual fall. Though we go through seasons many times over I pray this season is one where I ponder how God is pruning me and helping me to grow my spiritual garden.
Bianca Hennager
September 6, 2022 - Truth and Love
“Do not accept anything as the truth if it lacks love. And do not accept anything as love which lacks truth.” (Edith Stein). This quote has become a cornerstone for me as I interact with others. What I say does matter and needs to be thoughtful and spoken with love. Often, I have let my emotions get the better of me and will blurt out some flippant response not realizing the impact it may have on those that I love. Typically, when this happens, I circle back afterwards asking for forgiveness, but I feel like the damage has already been done. It is hard to take back words after they are spoken. Recently I had the opportunity to put this quote into practice and let me tell you it was hard. It required a lot of self-control and reflection on what was really bothering me and how I could speak it with love. The outcome of the conversation was beautiful though. Our ability to come together to see what we have in common and what we want as an outcome was productive and life giving. Both of us walked away with a clearer picture of what we each needed to do. We put a plan in action to get us the outcome we wanted.
Bianca Hennager
September 7, 2022 - Discipline
The word discipline means to train or to teach someone to obey rules or a code of behavior. As I was reading a passage from St. Paul he stated, “Endure your trials as discipline; God treats you as sons. For what son is there whom his father does not discipline?” (Hebrews 12:7-8). Reading that Scripture was an “ah-ha” moment for me as to how I approach my trials. If I view my trials as something to get through and “why me” then I am losing sight of the discipline it is teaching me. If I tend to have a “Job” complex – why can’t anything go right in my life, then I am missing out on the love that God has for me to help train me up in the ways he wants for me. Looking at my trials as disciplining myself, I have become strengthened and overall a more spirite filled individual. Thank you, Lord, for all the ways you are helping me to become more disciplined and closer to you through my trials.
Bianca Hennager
September 8, 2022 - Happy Birthday
Happy Birthday Mary and Michael! As a cradle Catholic, I must admit I was not aware of September 8th being the birthday of our Blessed Mother until I had my second son, Michael born on the same day. We celebrate Mary’s Immaculate Conception on December 8th as a Holy Day but not her birthday. One of the most poignant things I remember from my birth experience with Michael was the phrase “let it go.” This simple phrase held so much meaning as I had to let go of what I thought my birth experience was going to be, what eventually happened, and how I would move beyond it. I imagine Mary’s fiat being similar; her willingness to do God’s will meant she had to let go of what she may have wanted. She had to trust in God that he would make all things work. And boy did he! Through Mary God gave us our Lord and Savior Jesus, which is the most awesome gift, beyond what we could imagine. Mary serves as a pivotal role model for me as a Mother, woman, and follower of Christ. Her willingness to be open to doing what God wanted in her life is awe-inspiring. The depth of her faith inspires me to trust more in God even when things seem impossible.
Bianca Hennager
September 9, 2022 - Thank You for My fork
When my two boys were old enough to speak, I started teaching them common Catholic prayers such as Prayer before meals, Our Father, and Hail Mary. After our prayer before meals, we would go around the table and say one thing we were thankful for. My oldest son John would say joyfully, “thank you for my fork.” The first couple of times he said this, it was endearing. He was about three years old and had a strong vocabulary. Day after day he would thank God for the items placed in front of him; his Spiderman cup, his plate, his napkin, and the list continued. One day when I was meeting with his preschool teacher, Sr. Olga, I shared my annoyance at the lack of reverence my three old year had. Out of all the things he could be thankful for, he is choosing objects at the dinner table. Sr. Olga looked at me with loving eyes and said, “there are many people in this world who don’t have these items.” Sr. Olga was right; there are many people in this world without utensils to use when they eat, or cups to drink from. I was humbled by her lovingly reminder that even the simple things that we often take for granted are worthy of our gratitude. Now when we go around the dinner table and my children (much older) offer up their thankfulness, I use it as a reminder of all of the wonderful blessings we have and not to take anything for granted, even the simple things like forks.
Bianca Hennager
September 10, 2022 - Is Today the Day?
My Mother-in-law was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer last October with a prognosis of 6 to 12 months. The last week she has turned a corner in her struggle, and we can more immediately see her nearing the end of life. I am not really experienced with the end of life experience; however, I am learning a lot about this phase. I liken it to when I was pregnant and had reached a certain point in the pregnancy where you are “ready” to have the baby. It just reminds me how circular life is and how we are so impatient for God’s timing. When things are beyond our control and we have no real sense of time, but we want to move through whatever “it” is quickly. My husband shared how he dreads getting a phone call or seeing a text from family member(s). He confessed to me, “is today going to be the day that I lose my mom?” My heart hurts seeing him and the rest of the family as they come together to provide comfort and peace to their mother. I continually lift them up in prayer but have no answer as to when the day will come. The family is all together keeping a vigilant watch on their mother, tending to her in her final days. “Therefore keep watch, because you do not know the day or the hour” (Mt 25:13).
Bianca Hennager
September 11, 2022 - Lost but Now Found
The story of the Prodigal Son is a famous Gospel parable and one of my favorites. When I was re-reading this Gospel something different sparked my curiosity. I wonder what made the Prodigal Son want to return. Why that day did the prodigal son decide to return home? As my imagination got the better of me with all kinds of possibilities it had me questioning all sorts of situations like where someone may feel lost and then finds themselves. Take for example, the alcoholic – what makes them stop drinking or what makes the addict get their last fix? I am reminded that each day we wake up and we can make a choice whether to be lost or to come back to our Father. The choice is ours to be welcomed into his embrace and to be found. I can imagine the amount of shame the son must have felt knowing how he had disappointed his father. I am sure the son felt a fair amount of guilt too. Despite those overwhelming feelings, the feeling of needing to be home outweighed the guilt and shame. I pray for all those who may be lost that they feel the need to come home and be welcomed as the Gospel tells us to welcome our lost brothers and sisters.
Bianca Hennager
Reflections for Aug. 29-Sept. 4, 2022
August 29, 2022 - The Leap of Faith
Our Family Ministry group used to camp at Scott’s Flat Lake every summer. One of the ongoing traditions was to take a short hike to the spillway on the lake. Above it was a catwalk over a deep area of water. Depending on the height of the lake that year, the jump could be a 10-to-20-foot drop into the water. The kids would line up in their swimsuits, with their little legs shaking with excitement, adrenaline, and anxiety as they prepared to jump off. They were encouraged to face their fear and jump as everyone cheered them on. After the plunge, they would emerge from the water with such pride and accomplishment.
I’m reminded of moments like these when fear and anxiety overwhelm me. Hopefully our children will remember this as well. They all did a hard and scary thing but succeeded with their bravery and the support of their community. Taking risks, whether they are physical or spiritual can be difficult and frightening. But the reward is great. Musician Alanis Morrisette puts it best in her song “Thank You.” She sings “the moment I jumped off of it was the moment I touched down.” In other words, pushing past our fear can bring us great peace, fulfilment, and self-awareness.
With our faith in God, the power of the Holy Spirit, and the support of those around us, we can do hard things. And it makes for great campfire stories!
Jen Payan
August 30, 2022 - Mass Under the Trees
Camping with the Family Ministry group brings back so many fond memories. Every summer during our camping trip at Scott’s Flat Lake our group would celebrate mass. We would set an altar right in the middle of camp and our talented parishioners would organize a liturgy. The children would take on many roles in the mass. One of our priests would join us and preside over mass in the beautiful, forested campground as we sat around in our camping chairs.
One year we met another Catholic group that was staying on the other side of the campground and we invited them to our mass. The next thing we knew people were flocking to our camp with their chairs to celebrate the liturgy. Our gathering had over doubled in size and we up realized we may have a “loaves and fishes” scenario on our hands! We had not accounted for the volume of hosts we may need for our mass. Yet, all who came for communion were able to receive. While it was probably just Michelle Pfister’s creative work of divvying up all the hosts, I would like to think it was the same as Jesus feeding such a large group of believers in the gospel story. As in scripture, we probably even had some left over!
Most importantly, this mass brought groups of strangers together. Even in a dusty campground, under tall trees, without a building or electricity, we were able to take part in the Eucharistic celebration. That is the gift of the Catholic faith.
Jen Payan
August 31, 2022 - Donating Life
Over my career in as a trauma nurse I’ve been able to witness the most precious gift one family can give another – organ donation. It is truly a spiritual experience simultaneously witnessing the loss and preservation of life. This is because it reminds me so much of the sacrifice that Jesus made for us on the cross.
Before Jesus, the Jewish faith required an animal sacrifice for the forgiveness of sins. When Jesus arrived on scene, he stated that he was going to change that tradition. He told us he would give his own life to atone for all our sins. God’s people would no longer have to use the sacrificial mediator for forgiveness. He gave us direct access to God’s forgiveness. He gifted us with a fresh start and literally a new life.
I’m always reminded of this gesture when a tragic loss of life results in the saving of many lives. I’ve aided in procuring a new heart for a young father of 3 children, new lungs for a lady who had been struggling to breath for years, and a new kidney to a teen. This is always with immense gratitude for the dying and their family that made the decision to donate life. Do you have a little pink sticker on your driver’s license?
Jen Payan
September 1, 2022 - Impact of a Believer
As a young adult when I left home, faith was not my priority. I became so independent I felt that I didn’t even need God. Then, I found myself in a challenging job where I witnessed so much tragedy that I even questioned the existence of God. My spiritual and mental health suffered.
One day as I was in an ICU room caring for severely a injured teen that was dying, I overheard a remarkable conversation. The patient’s mother was speaking to a close friend at the bedside with her. She stated she had been overcome with so much anxiety and grief the day before that she could hardly function. Then she had gone home and just started praying. She was able to fall asleep that night and the next morning woke up with a huge sense of peace. She felt calm and able to face the terrible road ahead.
I had been quietly working on the IV pumps in the corner of the room. She probably never even realized that I was listening. But her words and actions changed my life. She brought me back to God. I realized that God had to be present in the world if he was able to bring peace to someone experiencing the worst situation imaginable. She will never know her impact. I often reflect on how my actions and speech regarding my faith can influence others without even being aware.
Jen Payan
September 2, 2022 - Who Are Your People?
As I have aged, I’ve learned the importance of friendship and fellowship. The quality and beliefs of those I surround me has made all the difference as I’ve faced the challenges in my life. I appreciate that God has surrounded me with friends that really fill my cup. I know He is always presenting me with people that I can connect with. Whether they are friends for life or a shorter period, they are of great value.
Occasionally, the time and closeness would be brief, but it always met a certain need in my life. Or maybe I was meant to be of help or service to them. Then there is an ebb and flow in a long-term friendship. Over the years I would be able to offer support and care to my best friend at times, then require just as much help from her in a difficult time of my own life. My bible study friends have been so special since we all share our faith.
No matter what, the friends that have surrounded me over the years certainly have been gifts from God and I am truly grateful.
Jen Payan
September 3, 2022 - Mary
Growing up my Grandma Eagle had a small Mary plaque that hung in her bedroom. When she passed away I chose to keep it as a remembrance of her. I remember bringing it home and walking around my house looking for the perfect place to hang it. I was drawn to a small wall near the closet in my daughter’s room. This was my “spirited” child that I always felt I needed a little more grace and patience with. This was the perfect spot for the Blessed Mother!
Shortly after hanging it up I returned home after a long day out and smelled something burning upstairs. I traced the smell to her room where I found some burned up pajamas hanging from a nightlight that was plugged into the wall. They must have been thrown unintentionally on the hot light as my daughter got dressed that morning. Fortunately, they had burnt themselves out and not caused a fire or any other damage. Suspended above the nightlight was the Mother Mary I had hung on that wall the day before!
Whether it was a miracle of just fire-retardant PJ’s I will never know. But, it reminded me how our Lady is watching over my family constantly. Even now, when I can’t be present with my children I know she is there protecting and interceding on our behalf. Thank you Mary!
Jen Payan
September 4, 2022 - Fire
For many years our family would camp on the south shore of Lake Tahoe for a few weeks every summer. We would enjoy hikes and mountain biking through the thick green forest. Then the Angora fire occurred. It destroyed homes and thousands of acres. The following summer it was heartbreaking to pedal through the desolate trails. The earth was barren with old ash and cinder and the forest had gone completely quiet without the birds and wildlife. It is eerie, but when I stopped my bike and took it all in, it was strangely peaceful. Almost like I had been transported to another planet. The following year, I returned for the ride and found some shoots of new trees emerging and small grassy areas with new plants. Each year as I rode the trail it grew lusher and the forest noises of wildlife and insects returned. After a period of years it returned to its original beauty with all new growth.
Scripture uses the example of purification by fire many times. Jesus even speaks of it. We also symbolize the Holy Spirit with it. My experience riding that trail in Tahoe was such a reminder of how the fire of our faith can help us get rid of the old and start anew. God has always made that available to us, especially with the help of the Holy Spirit.
Jen Payan
Reflections for Aug. 22-28, 2022
August 22, 2022 - A Walk with Christ
When you get together in the Cursillo movement it is customary to share your closest moment with Christ. I’m not a big sharer, nor, I think, are a lot of people. As a result, we hear of the closest moment as getting together with family, having the kids (or grandkids) visit, a special homily heard, maybe a trip to an impressive church. Or in a rare sharing, you might hear something really touching. What you don’t hear is of Jesus tapping you on the shoulder or running beside you in the turkey trot, carrying on a conversation.
What is unsaid is the fact that the same men who shared about their family get-togethers went out of their way to pick up a guy who needs a walker to come to this meeting. That they drive - on a regular basis - all the way from Davis to be part of our community. That they leaned over to a loved one in church to tell them that they loved them. To me, I feel as if I’ve truly encountered Christ when I am witness to these things -when I see our faith in action - It isn’t getting together with family so much as being Christlike yourself. As Catholics, we know that Christ lives in us. We become His hands and feet. And it is the realization that the small, loving things that I do for others on a regular basis is truly an extension of Christ working through me. So I can honestly say that today, my closest moment with Christ is being among those who are indeed, the embodiment of Jesus.
Don Eagle
August 23, 2022 - Look Around
To me God is not “in heaven” so much as I feel that God is all around me. He is in the beauty of a sunset, the majesty of a mountain, the serenity of a lake, and the eyes of a child. The Romans simply put a different God in charge of most anything, whereas the Israelites had one God in charge of everything. To us, He is all encompassing, everywhere, and everlasting. In short, God is, as our hymn goes, “standing right beside me.” From my first breath to my last, I feel that God is with me, no matter what. There have been occasions in my life where I felt His presence more than others. In college, I was involved in a terrible car accident. Coming out of the Caldicot Tunnel, the Volkswagen I was riding in was sideswiped by an oncoming car, causing us to flip the car, skidding upside down to the edge of a steep embankment. My date and I, as well as the driver and his date, managed to extract ourselves from the upside down car, and walk away virtually unscathed. We should all have been killed, yet God was the fifth passenger in that vehicle. I think he had other plans for our future. God was with us then and continues to be. As a humorous aside, the first thing we did upon exiting the car was to turn the car radio off so we wouldn’t run down the battery (of the totally destroyed car)!
Don Eagle
August 24, 2022 - On This Note…
Pope John Paul II once said, “I have a sweet tooth for song and music. This is my Polish sin.” Like the Pope, I too have a sweet tooth for music and it has always been a big part of my life. I get spiritually lost when I listen to a great piece of music and feel an affinity towards God. He is there from the overture to the finale. He is there from the whisper to the crescendo. From the deep notes of an alto to the high notes of a coloratura soprano, my whole being appreciates and loves the complexity involved. The harmony of orchestral instruments, all working together, spell out the wonder of creation, the sense of God Himself. I am inspired when I sit in the lap of God and feel the harmony of the universe, the bursting forth of spiritual energy, the joy of being. To me, music is a gift that man gives back to God. It is one of those rare gifts that enrich the soul and allows your spirit to soar. Just listen to the works of Mozart, Gabrielli or Charpentier. Music is the hallmark of many occasions. Think of the simple Happy Birthday song, graduation marches, wedding music, concerts, liturgical themes, and finally, to music played at a funeral. When I think about it, music stands alone. Enhancing, enchanting, embracing, and giving my spirit-filled life a decided boost. I’m not too sure about all those harps in heaven, I’m hoping for a full-on orchestra, replete with a big choir and some really great soloists. I’m hoping that Pavarotti, the Mormon Tabernacle Choir, and Toscanini will be performing when I finally get to see God’s face. (Well, maybe one harp will be okay).
Don Eagle
August 25, 2022 - A Sailor’s Tale
To me, sailing is putting yourself in the hands of God as you voyage through life, quietly, confidently, with love and with purpose. One of my very favorite images of God can be likened to sailing. This relationship has been to me, as like a child with a toy boat. As an adult, I not only found joy in sailing, but had a very personal experience with God himself. Think of it. You are afloat on the sea,( life) in nothing but a small hull. You are totally dependent on the wind (the breath of God) to move you, to get you going, skimming across a surface that hides danger below. You use that wind to get to your destination. And that wind fills your sails, refreshes you as you go. You have a destination in mind, and the key to that destination is in discovering how to get there. You need to know where to go, which direction to follow. Enter the second person of the Trinity, showing you the way. Knowing where your ultimate destination is, and having the help to get there, you realize that you are one with the Father. It is you, and the Father, and the Son, driven by the Spirit, that fulfills your journey across the water. The wind is quiet, yet you hear the rush of water against your hull. You drive through the waves, experience the storms, but using your direction, you see where you are going. When your sails are lowered, you arrive at your destination. At peace, to enjoy the calm and serenity of your anchorage.
Don Eagle
August 26,2022 - Camaraderie
Every year I attend the Men’s Day of Prayer sponsored by the men of St. Mel’s Parish. It’s always well attended with several hundred men attending and hearing a dynamic guest speaker. Attendees come from every corner of the diocese. Last Spring Fr. Matthew Spencer was the guest speaker, a priest who has been close to our SS Peter & Paul for many years. This year, his take on St. Joseph was both profound and enlightening. Beyond the conference itself, I always come away with a deeper meaning imbedded in such meetings. Aside from learning and taking notes, I am always impressed with the brotherhood of the men attending. Beyond the handshakes and hugs, there is a commonality of belief, a sense of purpose, a feeling of mutual love of one another, all which lead to strong Catholic community. I have experienced new-found friendships that stretch across many Diocesan parishes, men who have found they are not alone in their beliefs, and yearn to discover their inherent Christian being. Our common goals are summed up in the Cursillo statement to “Find a friend, be a friend, and bring a friend to Christ” through piety, study, and action. Those are the watchwords, and, discovering that we are not alone, the camaraderie engendered at these get-togethers is the underlying feeling I get beyond the event itself.
Don Eagle
August 27, 2022 - Sun Shines Forth
Granted, It’s a simple song. And yet it is so meaningful (at least to me) because it spells out both a spiritual reckoning and one that deals with personal relationships.
You are my sunshine
My only sunshine.
You make me happy
When skies are gray
You’ll never know dear how much I love you,
Please don’t take my sunshine away.
What starts out as a fun tune quickly switches into one of commitment, love, and fear. The words are actually quite stirring, and I envision God in every line. The same goes for feelings toward my wife. Funny how the two are inextricably entwined, and how those words bounce off of each, enhancing the other. This little ditty speaks of our relationship with God from the time of our birth until the curtain falls. It also speaks of the person who makes our life complete, and of how deep love grows, confessing that life would be incomplete without her. (Or him, as the case may be).
If I look at this song as a sort of prayer, I read into it that God is all around me, bringing joy to my life, and being ever at my side. And I, in turn, love Him and always want him with me.
If I look at this song as an expression of my feelings toward my wife, I complete the picture of mutual love and support, never wanting it to end.
Don Eagle
August 28, 2022 - Quiet Time
In a world filled with ever-increasing noise, how wonderful it is to unplug, and experience the sweetness of quiet. Cell phones, messaging, emails, robocalls, direct mail and the direct exposure to 3,000 messages a day deprive one of the time to sit back and think, pray, and contemplate. I find that reflecting on spiritual things is heavily compromised by the constant barrage of others seeking your attention, support, or distraction. I’m thinking that the church has long recognized the power of solitude, of solitary prayer, and of the rapture of focus. Monks, hermits, and cloistered women have all discovered the value of losing themselves in the mysteries of God.
Jesus began his ministry by prayer and reflection — alone, communing with the Father. And, throughout the New Testament, He withdraws to be alone to pray, even to the final Garden of Gethsemane prayer.
I personally think that withdrawing, seeking solitude and time to think, is a real must for spiritual health. I love to turn off my cell phone, let the robocalls go unanswered, and dump the direct mail solicitations in the wastebasket. I’d much rather use my brain to think of loftier things. I’d really prefer to contemplate a life that is giving in a spiritual sense. Quietly, listening and not talking. And I am reminded now and then of how God appeared — not in the thunder, not in the earthquake nor the fire, but in a tiny whispering sound.
Don Eagle
Reflections for Aug. 15-21, 2022
August 15, 2022 -As Needed
My wife and I eat an almost exclusively plant-based diet. This reminded me of a proverb from 1826: 'Tell me what you eat and I will tell you what you are', which we hear as, ‘You are what you eat’. Thinking about this, I realized that the wisdom of this goes beyond the plate or palate. I am, or more correctly, I become, what I consume. For health considerations, this is well described. If I eat high calorie low fiber foods, with plenty of sugar, salt, and fat I will develop medical problems. If children or the elderly do not get sufficient protein, they will either not grow or dwindle faster.
But how about the other things I consume? My society is often referred to as a consumer economy. I consume energy, natural resources, and manufactured goods. I ask myself whether I am consuming to keep my body and mind strong, to serve others, express my faith and live a Christian life, or am I addicted to consuming. What do I consume as entertainment when I read, listen, or watch? Do I consume because it gives me pleasure or provide a sense of security and power or do I consume only as needed to be a healthy member of the Body of Christ? Do I consume while others of God’s children do not have merely enough to survive? Do I figuratively consume their lives for my own? As I go about my day today, I will ask myself, ‘What have I become?’
Ray Frink
Aug. 16, 2022 - Buffalo and Penguins
Lately I’ve been trying to hear God in my life. I believe He is there; I just want some clarity. This is not the first time, nor the last time, I will do this. I am trying to expand my daily prayer, hear the whisper of His voice, or see a sign. I am seeking instruction in dealing with the storms, great and small, of life. As is often the case, two examples from nature showed me how to address my current storms.
These two examples involve buffalo, cows, and penguin chicks. When a storm is approaching over the Great Plains the storm usually comes from the west and moves to the east. Cows and buffalo go in opposite directions. Cows flee before the storm and since they are slow, they actually move along with the storm and prolong their discomfort and pain. Trying to escape the storm only worsens their condition. Buffalo turn and charge the storm, moving toward the storm and shortening the time the storm controls their lives. God in nature tells me there are times I need to charge the storm.
During a cold and windy winter penguin chicks huddle in mass to protect themselves from the cold. Chicks in the interior move to the outside and outside chicks move to the interior regularly so that all are protected most of the time. God in nature tells me there are times when I need my spiritual community to protect me and times when I protect them.
Ray Frink
August 17, 2022 - Missing You
I am often asked if I miss actively practicing medicine. Family members and close friends think I still do because I say “the shingle is always out”, a reference to the old routine of a newly minted doctor hanging a sign or ‘shingle’ to advertise their presence. I take calls about medicine from family at all hours.
My answer to missing medicine is always the same. I miss the people: my patients, my medical coworkers, and the non-medical support staff including the environmental staff. When I heard that one of our SS. Peter and Paul staff tries to smile at everyone she encounters, I adopted this for the hospital and office cleaners. I miss them because they most appreciated the simple recognition a smile brought. They were not invisible to me and I appreciated the thorough, necessary, and usually thankless, jobs they did.
Jesus was always concerned about the people. Did they have enough to eat.? Did they understand what He was saying? Did they receive the spiritual guidance they deserved from the clergy of the time? In scripture, after his encounter with the Samaritan women we read of Jesus healing many, probably to the point of exhaustion. Jesus healed without regard to position or station in life. There was no seeking influence or good will from those He cured. For Jesus, the most genuine expression of Himself, was to feed, teach, cure, love. May I have the wisdom and strength to remember these four goals.
Ray Frink
August 18, 2022 - Change the Script
In the world of television, Captain Kirk of Star Trek provides an example of overcoming. A recurring commentary is how Captain Kirk survived a test with an absolutely no-win scenario. He alters the computer program. He is accused of cheating. His response is: “I changed the conditions of the test”, or as I say, he changed the script.
If I have learned anything about sin or acting in a way I would prefer to avoid, it is that these acts tend to repeat themselves. Most are private. Sin is more often personal. These are not on the front page of the Sacramento Bee.
Advice that I recently heard given to a teenager on the avoidance of sin stayed with me. I paraphrase the advice: If you can identify a pattern of thought, emotion, or behavior that occurs before you act, then change the script. This simple advice is not easy. It requires reflection, planning, and commitment. It requires recognition of what those triggers may be that start me down the path. Then there is the moment-to-moment decision to change course, to redirect my energy away from sin, and toward a better choice, use of time, or avoidance of temptation. There is the possibility of failure because often it is easier to follow a familiar path. These moments of choice are made a little easier with prayer, a quick reminder that the needed extra bit of strength is available.
Ray Frink
August 19, 2022 - Preserve, Protect, and Defend
From previous reflections some readers may have guessed that the natural world is sacred to me and that is where I find God most often. That I believe this is reflected in the gifts God has given me. How else can I explain my sometimes-insatiable curiosity about the world in which we live? If you don’t spend time in nature, you don’t know what you’re missing. For many men and women, some of whom were my patients, this could have been disastrous.
Meet the Pacific Yew tree. Known as an excellent wood for archery bows, cabinetry, musical instruments, and carving, the bark of this tree also naturally makes a compound with extraordinary anti-cancer properties. The compound is no silver bullet curing cancer. Its discovery and development did revolutionize cancer therapy for ovarian, breast, and other cancers in my lifetime. Why this long exposition on a tree?
God gave me the natural world to discover, enjoy, and acknowledge its untold treasures. During my career I often exited my home each day, got in a car, did my job and returned home without ever looking at a flower, plant, or tree. I often unconsciously assumed that what nature provided me was to be used without thought of the implications. I wonder what other untold treasures await us in nature. How much bigger can my life be if I simply look around? Who knows what I may find if I look with an open mind and open heart?
Ray Frink
August 20, 2022 - Music Leads the Way
When I was younger, along with popular music, I listened to many works of classical music. I enjoyed the range of feelings that the music allowed me to experience even when I could not or would not experience those feelings by myself. This has continued over the years. When I passed my exams for my doctorate I opened the windows of my dorm room and played Beethoven on the stereo as loud as I could tolerate. Music was an important part of my graduate school religious experience. Music played a prominent role in my wedding. I have sung some hymns for so many years I have the words memorized. There are certain songs sung at SS. Peter and Paul that will lift my spirits, bring a smile to my face and almost bring tears to my eyes. I have picked out the music for my celebration of life when that time comes.
I believe deeply in the saying by St Augustine: To sing is to pray twice. My dad had a very good voice as a younger man, my mom not so much. Still they both sang at church. It didn’t matter how they sounded. Sound rises to the heavens. This is both a request and a prayer today. When I gather with others for any celebration of our faith, I will sing. I don’t want to sing alone. The Trinity is deserving of our voices. Those voices do not need to be perfect.
Ray Frink
August 21, 2022 - Revealing Myself
“This is perhaps the greatest risk that any of us will take, to be seen as we really are.” The narrator of a movie based on the fable of Cinderella, speaks this at a critical moment. When I was a child, I felt no need to hide who I was. I didn’t think about it. Around the age of 12 and from then on, the opinions of others, the values of the world, weighed on my mind. In response, I studied hard, worked hard, shielded myself from hurt, and kept to myself. Although I could protect myself from the pain of being known, I realized in my 20’s that this was no way to live. Aided by the encouragement of mentors, teachers and those who love me, I was once again comfortable sharing myself, allowing others to know who I am. Thus, you all now get the person once described as “reserved, but warm”.
Jesus on numerous occasions reminds us to trust the Father. “Do not be afraid”, is a frequent admonition in the New Testament. The words ‘Fear not’, with the love and reassurance they imply, reportedly appear 365 times in the Bible. If only I had heard and incorporated that advice when I was 12, perhaps the intervening years of growth would have been different. I’ll never know. When I interact with those younger than myself, I will try to give them space to be who they are, loved by God, created as He wants them to be. Fear not!
Ray Frink
Reflections for August 8 - 14, 2022
August 8, 2022 - Asking God to Be Present Is Bad Theology
Did that get your attention?? I recently heard Lucy Abbot Tucker, a renown spiritual director, say this. And I realized, she is right. Asking God to help us be present to God’s presence would be more accurate, perhaps more appropriate. God doesn’t need us to call Him to come down from afar. God is right here, always. And yet… our liturgy and our prayers have some beautiful expressions of our calling. We sing, send down your Spirit at Pentecost… one of my favorite liturgies. We pray, “Lord, hear our prayer” at every Mass. Does God need us to remind Him to hear us? No, but perhaps we need to be able to say these words to remind us that God does hear us.
There is a children’s book that I have always loved called, Mama, Do You Love Me? Throughout the book, the child asks, Mama, do you love me? And the mother replies, I will always love you. The child continues, even if I… (and she lists lots of naughty things) would you love me? The mother continues to affirm her love and in the last line, the mother says, “I will love you forever and for always, because you are my Dear One.” In our intimate relationship with our Beloved, we call out, Lord come to us! And God says, I am already here. We cry out Mama, Papa, do you love me? And God replies, I love you forever and for always, because you are my Dear One.
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio
August 9, 2022 - What Does It Mean to Be a Synodal Church?
Several months ago, together with many of you, I participated in a process of coming together to discern, how is the Spirit calling us as Church? This was an invitation from Pope Francis and something that is being embraced all around the world. Many of us mistakenly paraphrased this invitation by saying, the Pope and the Bishop want to know what we think… they want our opinions. I think we miss the depth of meaning with this understanding. Pope Francis is reminding us of what we already are, what was confirmed in Vatican II. We are a synodal Church, the body of Christ that journeys together and discerns the Spirit’s movement in us collectively. The Spirit is active in you and me and invites us to listen in the depths of our hearts for where God is leading us. The Church is not frozen in time, but alive with the Spirit. As I participated in the listening sessions, I heard people’s hopes and dreams; and I felt their pain and frustration. It is hard being Church! Being synodal means we journey together, with each other and with God. We listen for the Spirit moving in and among us. And we are surprised sometimes that God’s ways are not our ways. God always invites us to more.
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio
August 10, 2022 - On Holding Space
As a spiritual companion, I have been challenged to learn the difference between offering advice or even sympathy and holding space. Holding space means being present—fully present to another, without directing or advising or catechizing. These other forms of companioning have their place in a different context, but not here. There is a unique space that is created when I can be present to someone without judgment or expectation. It is a form of deep listening with the whole body. I experience God providing that kind of presence to me sometimes in prayer. Advice doesn’t come, expectations are not spoken. God is just present, waiting patiently while the seeds he planted in me germinate. Waiting like a lover who honors my independence.
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio
August 11, 2022 - Wounded Healer
I have recently been intrigued with the term “wounded healer.” It is a concept that serendipitously keeps showing up in books I’m reading, prayers I find, etc. I have always found comfort and a little awe in the Gospel readings where the resurrected Jesus appears with his wounds. The wounds did not disappear, they are not even scars, they are wounds that one can put a hand in. I think that is significant and something I need to pay attention to. For me it confirms what I experience in life. Challenges, suffering and loss are often not avoided or removed by prayer. Instead, I am helped to move through these times. I am accompanied and strengthened. And as a result, I grow and become more genuine and compassionate in the process, and I carry my wounds. I learn to trust God in a life that is unpredictable and out of my control. Wounded healers are people who can be with each other in mutual awareness of our hurting humanness. We do not rescue each other, but compassionately call on each other’s inner strength and faith in God’s accompaniment. We support each other not in a pity party, but as soul friends who have experienced life’s trials, grown in wisdom, patience and trust in God as a result of the roads we have walked. That’s the kind of companion I want when I’m facing challenges. A wounded healer.
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio
August 12, 2022 - Claiming Our Shadow
Listening to the news, I caught myself saying, “What a self-righteous jerk!” I have a whole list of people I find distasteful. Then slowly, something dawns on me. I remember a couple of scripture passages…something about a wooden beam and a splinter, something about casting stones… Our human tendency is to see the things we don’t like about ourselves in other people. In psychology it is called projecting our shadow. I’m quite good at this. I can be very judgmental about judgmental people, narrowly critical of people I perceive as narrow thinkers. What is fascinating is how hard it is to catch myself!
There’s a lot of shadow projection going on these days. It is reflected in our deep divide as a culture and our conflicts with friends and neighbors. Jesus said to take the beam out of your own eye so you can see to help your neighbor with his splinter. How do I do that? I’m learning the challenging process of noticing when someone really pushes my buttons. When there’s a lot of emotion raised in me, particularly by people I don’t even know well, I ask myself what inner part of me is like that? What areas of myself do I need to recognize and work on?
Our healing and wholeness come in recognizing our full selves, including the aspects of ourselves we don’t like very much—our shadows. In recognizing and claiming my shadow, I humbly understand my weaknesses and invite God’s healing transformation.
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio
August 13, 2022 - On Being “Good”
Thomas Merton said, the hardest group to convert are those who identify as good. As Christians, I think our challenge is to do good works, but not to get to thinking we are good (or better). As I think about the temptation of “being good,” a few things come to mind. First is “good enough.” Do I, do we, get comfortable with certain patterns of prayer, worship, and charity so that my experience as a disciple feels good enough, a box to check along with the rest of my to do list? Second, good can also means self-righteous. It is always a comparison to others who are “more or less good.” “Good people” can easily become code for “people like me, people who share my values…” That’s a slippery slope. I can easily end up associating “good” with my tribe, my cultural expression of spirituality, my country, my political party… It becomes quite insular. Finally, good can imply a God who keeps score. Suddenly we are earning something, even if on an unconscious level. “I’ve been good and faithful, how could God let this happened to me?”
In the Gospels Jesus seems to always be connecting with people who are on the margins of goodness. I used to think it was to bring them into the fold of the “good people.” Now I don’t think so. Perhaps it was to show us that we are ALL on the margins and all in need of his loving work in us—always.
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio
August 14, 2022 - God’s Presence in Hard Times
As I write this, I am on retreat at the Mercy Center with Brother Don Bisson. We are talking about living in God‘s presence during times of deepening shadow. Deepening shadow certainly represents how I have experienced many things in our world of late. Life seems full of so many divisions, full of selfishness, violence, and despair. How do I participate as the body of Christ in the midst of these challenging times? Here’s some of what I’m learning: I need to distinguish between healthy and unhealthy anxiety. Healthy anxiety, or healthy suffering, shares in the experience of the world’s suffering. It does not seek an escape. It is the capacity to show up in our reality even though it is hard. It invites me to speak the truth even when it’s not popular and to let my discomfort with the brokenness in the world prompt me to ask, where is this pulling me? How is God asking me to respond? What is mine to do? Unhealthy anxiety becomes helplessness and hopelessness, and it can collude with evil. I am learning a healthy response requires spending time in prayer and silence, spending time in sacred space, and spending time with people in community. It means following Jesus and His values rather than the values of the world and making sure that my actions in life are grounded in Gospel values. And of course, it means knowing that I do not do any of this without God’s grace.
Renee Regacho-Anaclerio
Reflections for August 1 - 7, 2022
August 1, 2022 - Emmanuel
If you read the title of this and assumed I was talking about Emmanuel, “God with us”, you were mistaken. Emmanuel is an emu that has taken over the internet, photobombing his owner’s TikTok videos. Emmanuel’s videos were shared across all the internet platforms and I laughed every time I saw one. The videos are sweet, wholesome and funny, and are a reminder that the internet can be full of joy! What was most interesting to me though was the variety of people I saw posting Emmanuel’s videos; they were people young and old, both extremes of the political spectrum, and of varying faith backgrounds. After years of divisive posts and extreme polarities, it seems that a photobombing emu brought people together, if only for a few short weeks on the internet. So maybe I was wrong. Maybe this is about God with us after all.
Erin Gallawa
August 2, 2022 – Snorkel
Last month we took a family vacation to Hawaii. One of the days we went on a snorkeling trip. Initially one of my daughters didn’t want to snorkel, so she just jumped in with a noodle to splash around. After only a few minutes in the water she predictably regretted this decision and decided to snorkel. The first profound moment for me happened when Ana handed back her pool noodle and the employee asked me if she was ok to swim without a floatation device. I immediately answered that she was a strong swimmer and I surprised myself when I realized how it true it was. I don’t know when she became capable, but this was the moment I knew it. I spent the next 45 minutes chasing her around the bay. It was the best part of my vacation—watching my daughter use her confident, capable body to navigate in the ocean and explore underwater. She even dove below the surface with me to see things up closer! I stopped looking at fish and was only watching my daughter as she experienced a new world around her. My greatest joy wasn’t what was under the water—it was watching her see it. How wonderful it must be for God to recognize what we are capable of and watch as we delight in the world around us!
Erin Gallawa
August 3, 2022 – Home
I feel like I have written dozens of reflections about water, but I have such a strong connection that I am always thinking of the way water is present in my life. My longing for the water feels primal; I feel called to the water and I have a strong urge to immerse myself in it. I cannot be near water without at least washing my hands and I will walk right into the river with my shoes and socks on. When we went to Hawaii last month we took a hike to the ocean. After a few miles on the exposed lava fields of the Big Island, my daughter Grace ran straight for the water. She sat on the edge of the water as the waves rolled over her, again and again. I looked at her and knew that she, too, felt at home in the water. It’s not about liking to swim. It is about feeling connected and at peace. I love to look at water, but more I love to be IN the water, as does she. God lovingly created the waters of the earth and I am blessed to be at home among them.
Erin Gallawa
August 4, 2022 – Knowing
One of the strangest parts of parenting in the last few years has been realizing that my kids know things that I did not teach them. There were so many early years of their life when their whole world experience was what they saw and learned from me, my husband and the small handful of people who cared for them. One day they came home from a day with my mom saying, “Whatcha talking ‘bout Willis?” It was a surprising question from a toddler, but an entertaining one! That was just the beginning of my children learning outside our home!
At age 11, my kids have been in school for years now, are avid readers, and have discovered YouTube, so I should not be surprised when they know about the Greek gods or can tell me strange facts about ocean creatures. Yet, I am constantly surprised by what they know and can do. “Wonder and awe” is one of the Gifts of the Holy Spirit for helping us to recognize the glory of God. But I can’t help but ponder myself if God looks down upon us, His own creation, with wonder and awe at what we, His creation, can do and know.
Erin Gallawa
August 5, 2022 – Feet of Jesus
In a recent Gospel reading we heard about Mary and Martha. While Martha was busy serving, Mary sat at the feet of Jesus. I was struck by the image of Mary at the feet and began to wonder who else would have sat at Jesus’ feet. Surely it would have been women and children, or other humble people who would take any place, no matter how lowly, to be near to him. I don’t think of sitting at someone’s feet as a place of honor. Sitting at someone’s feet feels like an act of humility and openness. It reminds me of something children do, gathered close so they can see and hear unobstructed. When I think of Mary in this place, I think of a woman whose heart is so open to God that she would accept even the humblest position to be present to the word. Does my pride prevent me from coming to sit at the feet of Jesus? Am I open to hearing the word even in places I am not used to listening to him?
Erin Gallawa
August 6, 2022 – Smell
I walked past a Free Little Library one evening while I was walking my dog. It was already dark so I was surprised to see that it was lit up by happy little twinkly lights. Through the glass I couldn’t see any books I was interested in, but I opened the door anyway and I was overcome by the smell; the smell of books, the smell of my childhood, the smell of old, loved paper. When I think of books, my initial thought is that they are visual. We read them with our eyes and then create images in our head. I don’t usually associate the sense of smell with reading, but the smell of those books made me think of staying up late into the night, reading books in near darkness when I should have been sleeping. Smell evokes such strong memories. I think of some of the smells of the Church—incense, the Chrism oil my children were anointed with in Baptism, the way the church building itself smells. All of these smells connect me to people, places and liturgical celebrations. Each of our senses is a gift. Today I am grateful for the gift of smell.
Erin Gallawa
August 7, 2022 – Hospitality at the Door
When anyone leaves my parents’ house, my dad and mom (and sometimes the dog, too!) walk out to the front porch to say goodbye. It is not just a quick goodbye. It is a lingering until the car is backed out and we have driven down the long driveway. Often they will sit on the front steps and remain there. A few weeks ago Deacon David talked about hospitality in his homily, and this image of my parents saying goodbye is what immediately came to my mind. My parents’ hospitality is not just for the moments we were invited there to share—this slow, lingering goodbye is like taking home a piece of their hospitality with us. There is a spirit in the way they open their home and so graciously serve others; their goodbye is an extension of that gift.
I think about how Father stands outside after Mass to greet parishioners and say goodbye before we leave, and it reminds me of this same type of goodbye. It is full of gratitude for the time we have spent together and a peaceful farewell until we are together again. May the spirit of service and hospitality fill us all until we gather again!
Erin Gallawa
Reflections for July 25 - 31, 2022
July 25, 2022 - Proximity
The book entitled “The Proximity Principle” talks about how to position yourself near the right people and places to get the career you love. Surrounding yourself with the 5 different types of people in your desired field can help you become successful. They are the Professor (those who teach), The Professional (those who made it), the Mentor (those who help guide you), Your Peers (those who challenge you through competition) and The Producers (These are the risk takers that build opportunities). I have all these types of people in my career, and they help me move forward. You may be wondering what this has to do with a reflection, well it does not matter what aspect of your life you are looking at, the Proximity Principle works with all of it. With the different ministries like Wake Up, L.O.V.E, RCIA, Music Ministry, Bible Study and more, I have these 5 types in each ministry, and they all help me grow in my spiritual life. Listening to and reading different scholars helps me understand my faith, but it is from my peers that I gain the most. We push and support each other to be better Catholic Christians and I learn so much from their example. Lord, Thank you for these men and women in my life.
Kurt Peterson
July 26, 2022 - Calling
In the RCIA catechumens and candidates receive a sponsor who helps them through the process. And for many, the sponsor becomes a part of their lives forever. A couple of years ago, one candidate was assigned a sponsor and a true friendship began. They quite often stayed in touch and recently when the man and his wife started having serious health problems, his sponsor and wife were there to help them in so many ways. I know when this person said yes to being a sponsor, he never dreamed to what extent answering that call would lead him, which is what makes this even more special. This sponsor and his wife are true Christians in my eyes, and they hold the true meaning of community in their hearts. I have seen this type of connection in the RCIA program many times over the years. I really believe it is the Holy Spirit that choses the sponsor for these men and women; we are just His instrument in facilitating it. If you have ever thought about being a sponsor just let us know. And if you have been chosen to be a sponsor, remember it is not us that are choosing but the Holy Spirit that is choosing you.
Kurt Peterson
July 27, 2022 - Father’s Day
Last month we celebrated Father’s Day and I had most of my children with me. Even though my son was not able to come out from NYC I still had a wonderful day. We all gathered at a local brewery and talked and laughed but the highlight of the day was when my wife took a picture of me with our seven grandchildren. My grandchildren’s ages range from the oldest of almost 12 years to the two babies. I had them all gathered around me and held the babies on each arm. It kind of looks like one of those photos you would have seen from 100 years ago. Every time I look at that picture, I just feel so blessed to have all of them and their parents in my life and so close to us. That picture also reminds me that I will do nothing in my life that is more important or that will compare to creating a family. Psalms 17:6 says, “Grandchildren are the crown of the aged, and the glory of children is their fathers.” Thank you, God, for you have truly blessed me, for my children are my heritage.
Kurt Peterson
July 28, 2022 - Life Happens
As many of you know a couple of weeks ago Darcy Wharton was in a terrible accident and was in the hospital for a few days. When I saw the picture of the car I saw how differently things could have been if the other car had hit her exactly where she was sitting. It was startling. We all get busy with our lives and don’t always express what the people in our lives mean to us. We always expect to see each other, but that is not always the case. We do not know the time or day when any of us will join Christ. In an instant I could have lost a very dear friend forever. As I get older, friends from my past are no longer here, and I didn’t let them know what they meant to me. Fortunately, Sarah and I will be able to have more time with Darcy, but I will not forget to let the people I love know that I love them. If you are like me, don’t miss the opportunity to let the people in your lives know how much you care.
Kurt Peterson
July 30, 2022 - Izzy
In the early days of Covid when we were all quarantining, we got a small cockapoo, part Cocker Spaniel and part Poodle, and we have never been happier. She is such a loving dog, especially with our grandchildren. She brings joy to our lives every day and Izzy is a great example of unconditional love. She greets my mother-in law, who lives with us, every morning and stays around her while Sarah and I are gone during the day. No matter what the day has been like, she is always happy to see us. I watch her in the back yard where she will lay down in the sun. I can imagine her taking in everything around her and just being content with what she has. Am I content with what I have? Our society tends to be in constant pursuit of things and we are rarely content with what we have. There are also so many things for us to be concerned about right now, but Jesus tells me do not worry or be afraid. In Mathew 6:26-29 Jesus says to look at nature and see how God cares for it, “Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap, nor gather in barns, yet your Heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not worth more than them?” Jesus also tells me: “Do not worry about the next day, because tomorrow will be worried for itself. Enough for the day is its own problem” (Mt 6:34). I can learn from nature and our pets about how to live. Jesus is not saying that I should not sow or reap or be prepared for things, but he is saying that it must not consume me. I must trust God!
Kurt Peterson
July 30, 2022 - Unresolved
Sometimes at Mass we will end a song differently then we normally do. The song will end unresolved. This means that the ending note did not resolve the melody. I like it when music does that because it feels like the song did not finish. It is as if the song continues, much like life itself. We transition from stage to stage. Infancy, childhood, young adulthood, adulthood and elderhood and in each stage our song continues unresolved into the next stage, adding to our song. Tempos may change, new variations occur, however, it is still the same song, the song of our life. We will add to it and subtract from it until the time comes when we pass from this life to where our song will finally resolve itself when we meet God. There our song becomes part of the great heavenly composition created by the Great Composer. When that time comes, I pray that my song will be pleasing to God.
Kurt Peterson
7/31/22 The James Web Telescope
Genesis 1:1 “In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth”. We are given an opportunity that no other person in human history had before. With the images that are being sent back from the James Web telescope, that is traveling through space, we are seeing the earliest images from the beginning of the universe. We may well be seeing in pictures the words of Genesis 1:1. The images that have come through so far are just amazing. Normally when we look up into the sky, we see darkness and small lights. Even though that alone shows us God’s awesomeness, these photos will show us a wonderous array of colors and shapes. No wonder he is called the Grand Painter. This is a great opportunity for me to develop a deeper understanding of God’s creation. Science has always been a part of faith for He gave us not only the ability but the yearning to understand our world and beyond. Science and faith go hand and hand. The father of the big bang theory was a Belgian Catholic priest and many of the great men that advanced discoveries in botany, physics, mathematics, biology, and astronomy were Catholics priest and friars. We believe that learning about God’s creation helps us to understand God. So, I hope you take the time to look at these pictures coming to us to see what 1Chronicles 29:11 says, “Yours, LORD, are greatness and might, majesty, victory, and splendor. For all in heaven and on earth is yours; yours, LORD, is kingship; you are exalted as head over all.”
Kurt Peterson
July 18, 2022 - Signs from God (Ref MT 12:38-42) The scribes and Pharisees said to Jesus “Teacher, we wish to see a sign from you.” He replied, “an evil and unfaithful generation seeks a sign, ….” For a faithful generation, signs from God are already there. They are countless; some will be simple and natural, but some will be special and great. But seeking signs from God in order to believe in Him is a sin of arrogance and it comes from an unfaithful person. One should open the senses to perceive what is already existing. There are plenty of ways God has blessed me for which I am so grateful.
There was an incident of saving my life in the form of a phone call. For some it may seem a coincidence, but for me it was God’s action and one of His special signs. A few years ago, on vacation while visiting my sister, I stopped my car at a manned rail crossing to take a phone call. Suddenly, an electric shock passed through my veins as I saw a train passing through the open rail gate. If I had not stopped the car to take THAT phone call, I would have been dead. Yes, it was a lifesaving moment.
God, I truly believe that every moment of my life is a gift to me. Help me to open my senses to aware of Your graces and blessings around me.
Bony
July 19, 2022 - God’s Family (Ref. MT 12:46-50)
And stretching out his hand toward his disciples, he said, “Here are my mother and my brothers. For whoever does the will of my Heavenly Father is my brother, and sister, and mother.”
Jesus revealed to the world a truth which was unknown till then: we are God’s family when doing His will. The disciples left everything at his call and were with him in formation to do his mission.
Everything I do in this world should be pleasing God. This was the basic catechism taught in our family. We are his disciples called to do God’s will in our various vocations and given responsibilities. We have a biological family that can be God’s family when every action is pleasing to Him.
Four years ago, as I neared my 25th anniversary of priestly ordination, I asked my mother for her opinion about having a family celebration. Her first response was, “it is important to celebrate it with your parish family where you are called to serve.” And she was right that SSPP is my family of God. I am so thankful to SSPP for celebrating my 25th anniversary of ordination with me. We are God’s family. I was reminded that we are God’s family, we are not alone in difficult situations and we keep the spirit of being God’s family in all our endeavors.
Bony
July 20, 2022 - Rich Soil for Abundant Fruit (Ref. MT 13:1-9)
“But some seed fell on rich soil, and produced fruit, a hundred or sixty or thirty-fold.”
While God sows the seed (His word) generously it is our responsibility to keep the soil (ourselves) rich. God the farmer, who owns us and entrusts us with personal responsibility, gives us wide opportunities to keep the soil rich and productive.
Many guided me in this process of cultivating good soil in my life. In my childhood days it was my grandfather, parents and schoolteachers, and in later years it was seminary formation, spiritual directors etc., - I am so thankful to many for keeping me on track.
Spiritual discipline with determination and motivation can help oneself be the fertile soil for good produce. Lifelong care is needed for the soil to keep it fertile and to have abundant yields. The times I fail due to negligence and weakness, I have opportunities to amend my ways through the sacrament of reconciliation, spiritual direction and retreats.
Every farmer knows how to give the constant care that is needed to keep the soil fertile. With the help of God’s grace, I want to keep my heart ready and prepared to receive his words so that they produce good fruits.
Bony
July 21, 2022 – The Insight (Ref. MT 13:10-17)
“They look but do not see and hear but do not listen or understand.” When the disciples asked Jesus why he spoke to the crowd in parables, Jesus quoted this from prophet Issaih. At the end of the conversation Jesus said to the disciples, “but blessed are your eyes, because they see and your ears, because they hear.”
The disciples understood Jesus for they were with him.After I had joined the seminary, in my sophomore year I met Mathai, a classmate from school, who said to me sarcastically that Jesus did not have a seminary. His family had already left the Catholic Church and embraced another denomination. I admired that he could quote the bible often to establish his stand against the church. I was unable to debate with him but I told him that Jesus had disciples walking with him. He had a grin on his face, unconvinced.
Later, during my 11 years of seminary formation I realized the courses and studies on philosophy and theology, spirituality and disciplinary life were all important but the most important was walking with Jesus and having Jesus in every moment of life. And completing the seminary life and priestly ordination is not the end, as I continue my journey with Jesus. Being with him I am able to see, hear and understand.
Bony
July 22, 2022 - Mary Magdalene (Ref. Jen 20:1-2, 11-18)
Mary Magdalene went to the tomb and found the tombstone removed.The Risen Christ appeared to her. She went and announced to the disciples “I have seen the Lord.”
Mary Magdalene’s visit to Jesus’ tomb reflects her emotional attachment to Jesus. I have witnessed the same emotional attachment to Jesus especially in my grandfather and my mother. Their relationships with Jesus have inspired me very much (a lot). I have seen my mother praying all the time for us; and spending a lot of time in prayer even today. Nonverbally, she is telling her children that she has seen the Lord. Whenever I lift the Holy bread in consecration announcing the Body of Christ, despite my unworthiness, I am blessed to have him in my hands. He lives in me as I receive him in communion; he is attached to me physically and emotionally. He lives in me and in you because we have seen the Lord.
Bony
July 23, 2022 - Good and Evil (Ref. Matthew 13:24-30)
The Kingdom of Heaven may be likened to a man who sowed good seed but an enemy sowed weeds in darkness. The good Sower allows the weeds to grow along with the wheat to protect it “let them grow together until harvest.”
Jesus reminds us that the reality of the world is the presence of good and evil; something we experience and worry about much of the time. We learn from the parable that wheat remains as wheat even when it grows with weeds. By growing with weeds, it has more resistance and God gives it strength not to be damaged. Sometimes we are also pressed hard to survive but we do not lose our connection to God. My conviction in the values I was raised with never gets corrupted, even when there is an inclination to bend it; then I pray hard for the guidance of the Holy Spirit.
It is a given truth that the good and evil exist side by side, and it is our choice to choose life or death (Ref. Deut. 30:15).
Bony
July 24, 2022 - Persistent in prayer (Ref. Lk 11:1-13)
On a request by the disciples Jesus taught them the Lord’s Prayer. Then he revealed to them who the Heavenly Father is: a compassionate friend and a loving father who knows what his children need in life.
Our human life is mostly focused on our wants instead of what we need in life. When I was a young child, the exam times in school were very stressful and my prayer was always to have a great score - wanting to have the questions being asked come from what I had studied. One time I asked my grandfather for some pennies to offer at the Church to do well in exams. Instead, my grandfather, who was a teacher by profession, told me to prepare well and pray for the grace to perform well as guided by the Holy Spirit. Our family had a candle lit the whole day on the family altar when something very important was going on in the family, like major exams, interviews and even celebrations. The lit candle reminded all in the family to pray for the intention and that we were all praying for a special cause.
I must pray persistently! God will provide me with what I need for he is a loving father and a compassionate friend.
Bony
Reflections for July 11-17, 2022
July 11, 2022 - Summer
The season has changed from mild to hot, not just warm, but hot. As my Mom used to say “…hotter than the gates of Hades.” I, as a person raised in Southern California, am obliged to say that I like it this way. Back then I was only an hour away from the blue Pacific and I would go there as often as possible to swim, lay out, get a sunburn and wait for a great tan long before sunscreen or warnings about skin cancer. That was also when I was ignorant about God and didn’t worry about those gates Mom referred to. Here I am now, decades later, wondering about the dark splotches on my skin and also wondering about the dark spots that might be on my soul. Fortunately, I have come to know the efficacy of sunscreen and my dermatologist says the skin spots are not worrisome. I have also gotten consolation from others who have told me that I have been absolved of those dark spots on my soul. So here I am, free to enjoy the sun and heat because (aside from the wisdom of age) the Son has shone brightly and given me new life in Him. I can welcome the heat.
Deacon David
July 12, 2022 - Have it Your Way
I’m pretty sure that most of you have heard that line from a hamburger commercial. When I order at that establishment, I do tell the counter worker just how I want my burger to be constructed. I like cheese and onions but I try to impress the idea that the sauce/mayo that they usually use in copious amounts is not the way I prefer it. I say something like “…just a little sauce/mayo”. Somehow that part doesn’t get communicated to the person assembling the burger so that the sauce “runneth over”. To be fair there was once an older lady counter worker who got what I said and made me happy but she has gone. So let me extrapolate to what I think God might be asking when placing his order at mass where I presume to receive His body and blood. I think He wants me to be aware of how I serve Him. Onions and a bit of cheese are O.K. but the sauce/sin should not be running over. Any sin can be cleaned up before eating by reconciliation and penance. Sure, I can go to a different burger joint but I like the taste of the one I reference. I cannot, will not go elsewhere to consume God because He does it my way.
Deacon David
July 13, 2022 - Reminders
My Insurance Company (You’re in Good Hands) sends an annual request for the current mileage on our vehicles to judge how much to charge for the coming year. I’m surprised by the yearly totals and wonder where in the world did we go to rack up all those miles. This yearly exercise reminds me of the mileage on my aging body and I wonder, as with the car mileage, where I’ve been and what I’ve done. Truthfully, those bodily miles seem to take a bit more of my energy year to year. That, of course, leads me to think about the spiritual miles I’ve gone during the past year and that gives me a chance to reflect and/or meditate on that journey. When I think about spiritual journeys of past years, I’m led to think about people I’ve met and talked with, especially those who have gone through the RCIA and joined the Catholic Church. Their journeys, like mine, have been those of growth and involvement and that reminds me that I have miles and miles to go.
Deacon David
July 14, 2022 - What’s in Your Wallet?
A couple of weeks ago there was a special collection for what is known as Peter’s Pence. The funds collected are remitted to the Pope for his distribution to various needs in the world. And those needs are not specifically related to Catholics. The Pope(s) recognize all people, regardless of religious affiliation, who are in need. That the Pope would recognize all people as sisters and brothers emanating from God the Father is a great lesson and example to me. Our parish also lives that example in maintaining a fund for people who approach the church for help with monetary needs, food needs and spiritual needs. No one is turned away or asked their religious affiliation. I wondered, when the basket came around, just how much to put in. A couple of bucks? Then I remembered the parable of the widow’s mite and how she put all she had in the collection while those who had much money gave out of their excess and did not follow the widow’s example of sacrifice. So I pondered for a moment, thought about the widow again and emptied my wallet. I say this not to extol my gift but to try to put myself in the shoes of those in need. The next time that I see the commercial that asks “what’s in your wallet” I will remember that what is in my wallet is there because God has given me an abundance and that I, along with the Pope, have a responsibility to those who have so much less. What’s in your wallet?
Deacon David
July 15, 2022 - Recharging
Truth be told, I am dependent upon my iPhone, as much as I don’t want to admit it. I go through a daily ritual of plugging it into an electric outlet so as not to miss any messages and to be able to (confession time) play the word game I like a lot. Of course, I tell myself that I NEED to be available to my wife, children and parishioners so I carry the iPhone around with me, even when driving, so I won’t miss a call. No, I don’t answer it while driving but I do pull over to check out who is calling. At the end of the day, I liken myself to the iPhone in that I need recharging. So what do I do? I reflect upon the day, wondering if I have fulfilled the task that God has put before me that day. Have I omitted something I should’ve or could’ve done to help another? This question then reminds me that I have to, indeed must, plug into God and recharge. As much as my iPhone needs electricity, I need prayer to plug into my source of strength and purpose: God.
Deacon David
July 16, 2022 - Affirmation
Way back when I worked in a California State prison as a counselor, I attended many training sessions; amongst them was one which encouraged us to reflect upon the positive aspects of our lives in relation to our jobs as well as daily life. We were told to write reminders of those affirmative aspects on post-its and put those notes up in places where we’d see them often to help us stay positive. I poo-pooed that advice as some new age fad but now, as I’ve done a tiny bit of maturing, I think that there is value in reminding myself, and others, that God has given gifts and talents to be shared and used not only for myself but to benefit others. I don’t use post-it notes to affirm those God given attributes but I engage in a bit more prayer of thanks for the opportunities which I am able to respond to each day. I like to affirm my faith foremost when I join my voice to those of others in the congregation at mass saying, “I believe in One God….” It is my hope that you too will find affirmation in the faith we share, with or without post-it notes.
Deacon David
July 17 - Reflections
I am amongst numerous others in the parish who write about our thoughts relative to the faith we share as Catholics. I won’t lie to you, it is increasingly difficult for me to come up with new thoughts and topics as I’ve been doing this for about four years. I marvel at those wonderful book writing people such as Richard Rohr who have done reflections for not just years but decades. Just as I was writing this, I got up to get a glass of water and passed by a mirror. I stopped and looked at my reflection in that mirror and wondered “…what is God asking?” God has, through others, given me the opportunity to share my faith on a very basic level via these reflections, not as deep as Fr. Rohr’s, but simply mine. So I’ll continue to struggle and plumb the depths of my experiences, the ones God has given me to reflect upon and offer for your reflection. Perhaps I could recommend to you that the next time you take a look in the mirror that you reflect on what God is asking of you.
Deacon David
Reflections for July 4-10, 2022
July 4, 2022 – One Nation Under God
Last month we spent some time in Concord, MA and had the opportunity to visit the Minutemen museum and North Bridge. This is the location of the “shot heard around the world” and the first battle of the American Revolution. During the presentation we were informed that the families of the soldiers on both sides may very well have known each other just a generation prior to the battle. I had never considered that possibility. In the colonists’ noble desire to break free and create a free country, a great number of lives were lost.
Today we celebrate our country. Despite a bloody beginning and serious struggles along the way, we have maintained a belief in a country that embraces “liberty and justice for all”. Let us celebrate those times when we have worked toward this goal and may we strive to live peacefully as “one nation under God”. Darcy Wharton
July 5, 2022 – Let Us Mourn and Let us Dance
I recently came across a quote from Henry Nouwen which stated, “Let us mourn and let us dance”. He was referring to the need to feel all the emotions of life. It dawned on me that I spend most of my life somewhere in the middle of those extremes and often intentionally avoid spending any prolonged time mourning or dancing. What might it be like to live the “extremes” of life? There are certainly appropriate times to do both.
I can recall many times when I chose not to dance publicly so as not to embarrass my kids or myself. There were other times when I avoided mourning publicly to make others more comfortable. What moments of shared humanity may have been lost due to my decisions?
Perhaps God is stretching us to live at the edges more often! Darcy Wharton
July 6, 2022 – Generosity
My husband and I were both sick with Covid last month after traveling and I was overwhelmed with the number of people who checked on us daily and offered to do grocery shopping, drop off a meal, pick up medication, etc.
I know I’m not alone with my struggle to accept help. Many of you have shared your own struggles with this. However, I was sent a quote from author Wendy Farley which states “the good God often lets his friends fall sick so that every prop they lean on or might cling to may give way.” Well certainly one “prop” I was holding on to was the idea that I did not need help!
Receiving from generous souls reminded me that God will use anything – health, sickness, our life’s daily events and more- to shower us with love. What a generous God we have! Darcy Wharton
July 7, 2022- Revel in the Joy
If you’re a parent, you are aware that it is both a great responsibility and a great joy. Most days are a mix of both, especially in the early years of parenting. Now that our daughters are all young adults, we are in a unique position to just “watch” them from a distance. They have all moved out and are creating their own adult lives. My job as a parent has shifted and I am trying to catch myself when I feel the need to give unsolicited advice or to “fix” things that I feel need correction. Fairly recently, I intentionally switched my focus to trying to revel in the joys of their lives instead of looking for ways to influence their decisions. That is not easy! However, focusing on what is good and right in their lives makes discovering the joy all that much easier. We see what we are hoping to find!
It seems that Jesus did not focus as much on the mistakes of his followers but instead challenged them to grow closer to him through relationship.
I will continue to try to revel in the joys of each of my daughters. And as one of my daughters told me, my voice is already in their heads anyway! Darcy Wharton
July 8, 2022 – Just Follow
On a recent trip to Boston to visit our daughter Sarah, we discovered that she had created a very busy itinerary for us. We had previously been to the area three other times, but there were things she wanted us to experience. She crammed more things to do in each day than we ever would have attempted! I finally stopped trying to figure out if I could keep up and just decided to follow her lead. When I was feeling tired from all the walking (over 22,000 steps on one day in particular), she would simply say, “You can do it, Mom!” Although I questioned if she had a realistic understanding of my physical abilities, I decided to trust her, and we had a wonderful time.
Trusting. Following. These things are supposed to be basic Christian attitudes and yet they can be so difficult. This experience helped me remember that yes, trust is difficult, but the payoff is worth it when I am following a person I trust.
Jesus, I trust in you. Darcy Wharton
July 9, 2022 – The Gift of Godparents
Last month, I received the surprising news that my godmother had died. My godfather had died a few years prior. When I say I hit the jackpot of godparents, I am quite serious. They filled their home with love and laughter and I have fond memories as a child of being welcomed warmly at every visit. They never missed one of my sacraments and my godmother was even a lector at our wedding. Over the years, she left the Catholic faith to join an evangelical Church but she eventually returned. She even watched our online Masses during the pandemic although she lived in Manteca.
The lesson in all of this is to never underestimate the importance of godparents in a child’s life. Done well, it can have a tremendous impact. Her parting message to me (four days before she died) was to thank me for my constant love. I returned the greeting and will never forget how she modeled the unconditional love of God. May she, and all the others in heaven who were wonderful godparents, rest in peace. Darcy Wharton
July 10, 2022 – The Good Sam Club
When I was a child, our family would occasionally take a summer road trip to go camping. We graduated from tent camping to a small trailer. Since these were the days before smart devices and DVD players in vehicles, my brother and I would play all sorts of travelling road games. We also spent countless hours just staring out the window, something I don’t think any of our children experienced.
I recall seeing Good Sam stickers on various RVs on the road. My parents told me that the sticker indicated that the people belonged to a travel assistance club. It wasn’t until years later that I realized that the company’s name was a play on words and referenced the story of the Good Samaritan. How clever! Our family never joined the organization but as Catholics we were already members of the “Good Sam” club. This famous gospel message reminds us of the importance of doing the right thing (showing mercy) regardless of any societal or cultural norms that may encourage us to do otherwise. How many times have I ignored people in need or justified my lack of a merciful response?
These “simple” stories pack a powerful punch! Darcy Wharton
Reflections for June 27-July 3, 2022
June 27, 2022 – The Power of Hugs
I was recently reading about the effects of stress on our bodies and how we can continue to physically hold stress even after the stressor has come and gone. In my reading I learned that one way to physically release stress, besides exercise and deep breathing…is a 20 second hug. The trick to this sort of hug though, is that both people need to be at their center of gravity, and the hug “squeeze” should be reciprocal.
When I told my daughters about the magic of a 20 second hug, we practiced it and I thought that might be the end of it. However, one afternoon during the last week of school my daughter came up to me and said, “Mom, I think I need a 20 second hug!” She had been struggling with some anxiety and was desperate to tap into the magic of the 20 second hug.
For one, I was amazed at her ability to reach into a tool box to find what she needed for her own healing. But I was also struck that what she needed, she could not provide for herself…after all, we can’t hug ourselves. I suppose when we meet others at our center of gravity with reciprocity, it’s not only about a hug, but it’s about helping heal one another.
-Katie Maynard
June 28, 2022 – Slide Puzzle
I am a huge fan of the show Survivor and always love when the challenges include a puzzle. The producers and creators within that show come up with the most creative puzzles, but I think my favorite has always been the slide puzzle. You know, the ones where everything is jumbled and you can only slide them up/down and left/right in order to get the pieces in their places. Often it requires making the puzzle even more jumbled before the message or picture becomes clear.
I think this is true for my life as well – I get something into place in my life, only to have another piece slide out of picture/place. The thing that I’m not so sure of is whether I will ever really get to see the full picture and “finish” the puzzle in life. I think it may be more about constantly getting glimpses of what it might look like, and that maybe God only sees the finished puzzle.
The suffering then, is in the desperation I experience to feel like I have everything put together. The pieces are constantly shifting and changing, so peace can only come from detaching myself form my own expectations and let God’s vision be what it will be…and just keep sliding.
-Katie Maynard
June 29, 2022 – Deep Roots
We recently had some tall Italian Cypress trees removed from our backyard, and it was fascinating to watch the arborists work. If you have seen these trees before (perhaps lining the roads of Tuscany) you know that their tall and narrow trunks do not appear to be the sturdiest. On the day these trees were removed, my daughters and I watched these men climb, anchoring themselves, setting up a pulley system, and removing branches as they worked their way up the tree with their harnesses. As one of the arborists neared the top of the tree, he looked down at me and exclaimed, “The trunk is so skinny!” I thought to myself in that moment, that for such a skinny trunk to hold this man so high up in the air, the roots must have gone very deep!
When things feel shaky or uncertain in life, it’s my roots that keep me grounded: my family and faith. My mom once said to me that one of the greatest gifts that she ever received from my grandparents was the gift of her faith. And now, generations later we continue to pass on the faith, creating a root system that is deep and expansive for our nourishment.
Today, on the Feast of Saints Peter & Paul, I am filled with gratitude for the expression of my faith in this community, and I am reminded that there is no need to worry about skinny trunks when you have deep roots!
-Katie Maynard
June 30, 2022 – A World of Color
Recently we introduced our daughters to the movie, “The Wizard of Oz” to prepare them to see the musical “Wicked.” At some point, just as Dorothy awoke in Oz and stepped out into Munchkinland, and the film turned to vibrant color, my daughter leaned over and whispered, “Mom, the movie is scarier when it’s in black and white.”
Figuratively speaking, it’s true that when we see things in black and white, it limits our view and closes our mind to new and challenging ideas. Based on my observations of teaching high school students, as we grow and mature, conversations become more colorful (especially conversations about faith, spirituality and church). As we are challenged by our education and by the complexity of our lives, it becomes more difficult to see things in a strict duality. I know it seems counterintuitive, but it’s actually when we add color and complexity to things, that it makes things less scary and more beautiful…just ask my daughter.
-Katie Maynard
July 1, 2022 – Slowing to a Stop
I have often used the metaphor of a bullet train when speaking about the school year – it whisks us away in August and then we’re thrown off the train into the summer, with our head spinning. I acknowledge that one day, perhaps in my retirement, I may not be so affected by the frenetic rhythm of a school year. That being said, I don’t think we need to talk about a school year to understand what it’s like to zoom through life as though we are on a bullet train. Life can keep us moving so fast and singularly focused that we miss what is outside of our windows.
The truth is, it takes at least one mile for a train to come to a complete stop, so even if we wanted for everything to “just stop” it’s not possible. So, I think the question is not, “How can I stop this train?” but rather, “How can I slow this train to a stop?” It’s what I’ve spent most of the beginning of my summer trying to do: a little more sleep, a little more prayer, and a lot more presence. As things slow and creative space opens up, I begin to get my bearings, and find myself ready for what’s ahead…and for what’s outside of the train windows.
-Katie Maynard
July 2, 2022 – Trust Jesus!
Last week, my daughters participated in Vacation Bible School, which is always a favorite part of our summer…and this year was long awaited after a two-year hiatus. I helped volunteer in the Bible Adventure room, and spent weeks preparing the room and scripts for each day so that the bible stories would come alive for the kids. During the week, the hope was for the kids to encounter Jesus in Scripture in a fun and engaging way, and for them to make connections to their own lives.
As we tried to drive home each day’s bible point, the kids’ response was “Trust Jesus!” This response made me think about how easy it is for us to talk about trusting Jesus but much more difficult it is to feel what it is like to trust Him. If you’ve ever done a trust fall before, you know that falling backward on purpose is scary! I think that is what it feels like to trust Jesus: a little scary, and yet I know that peace will come with the surrender of leaving things in His hands. In the end it’s comforting to know that we’re not alone, and as one wise kindergartner exclaimed at the beginning of the VBS week, “Jesus is all around us!” Lord, I pray that I may have the courage to fall into your arms, and trust you!
-Katie Maynard
July 3, 2022 – Savor
Summer is here, and as a teacher I have come to love summers at home with my girls. Sure there is more refereeing between siblings and navigating the kids’ “boredom,” but it is always an opportunity to get back to basics. It becomes time for a simplified routine, a few new chores, and reading for pleasure. Of course there is adventure, swimming, and travel, but I think I have come to really love the day-to-day simplicity of the summer routine. Summer vibes mean an opportunity to savor what is happening around me: I love slow mornings, and saying YES to the ice cream man; I love having my girls “helping” me around the house; and I love trips to the library and family reading time.
This same simplicity is reflected in the wisdom of our liturgical year and the beauty of Ordinary Time. There might be a slower, more ordinary pace to this time…but it is also an opportunity to pay attention: to notice Jesus’ work in his teaching and healing ministry in our cycle of readings; to listen to the psalms; or to pay closer attention to the liturgy.
As we continue to move through Ordinary Time, I pray the same prayer for myself at home with my kids this summer: that my eyes may be open, that I may pay attention and notice God’s work in simplicity.
-Katie Maynard
Reflections for June 20-26, 2022
June 20, 2022 – Little Things
Last Good Friday I noticed the size of the Host that Father Bony raised for us to venerate during the service. The Host was small, the size of the ones we usually receive at communion. Because there was no consecration at the Good Friday service, both the Host that was elevated and the ones we received were kept over from Holy Thursday. The small size of this elevated Host spoke to me. How little it seemed in comparison to the larger hosts we are accustomed to seeing during a regular Mass. How insignificant it appeared. How could something so unimportant in appearance be so life giving?
I thought about the gospel stories about the Eucharist, as well as the stories of Jesus’ life and realized how consistent the message is, both visually and when proclaimed: God is in the little, seemingly insignificant things. Jesus was born in a stable. During his ministry he had no set address. He chose to be with the working poor, the marginalized and the outcast. He accomplished our salvation, not with the grand armies the Zealots were hoping for, but by dying on a cross like a common criminal. He used small, insignificant, ordinary things in his miracles: touch, words, spittle, water, bread and wine. As I meditated on this, that small, insignificant Host became for me a visual experience of Jesus and his entire insignificant human life; insignificant, that is until the Resurrection taught us that God himself is present in small and seemingly unimportant things.
Jane Haproff
June 21, 2022 - God Is Here
I recently attended the Woman’s Parish Retreat. The theme was Finding God in All Things, and one of the suggested ways of doing that was simply to say “God is Here” in any circumstance.
A few nights ago, I could not sleep. As I tossed and turned I became aware of certain things around me: David’s breathing, a breeze through the window causing the pocket door in the hallway to rattle, an itch in the middle of my back that I couldn’t reach, coyotes howling. I remembered to acknowledge consciously that “God is here” and a certain calmness came over me. Then my hip hurt, so I turned over and my nose got stuffy, the blanket was too heavy and just the sheet not enough, again “God is here” and more peace. I heard some small animal bump against the outside of the house, a car alarm begin to beep which was quickly turned off, a train go by in the distance, a light drizzle beginning to fall and, yes, “God is here".
How strange to experience God in someone else’s breath, a breeze, a noisy door, an itch, pain, discomfort, heat, cold, and yes, even in car alarms in the middle of the night and people who tend to them immediately, a train, an animal, the rain…truly I experienced God with me in so many different ways and just when I became grateful for all of it I fell asleep.
Jane Haproff
June 22, 2022 - God Chose Me
In a homily recently, Fr. Bony reminded us that we were chosen by God. My first reaction to this was a sense of joy, privilege, and responsibility. Then I immediately wondered how that would sound to non -believers. The ones I know might feel envy or anger - a sort of why you and not me. I thought then about what it means to be chosen. I liken it to having my 5th grade teacher ask me to stay after school to help her clean blackboards and erasers, empty the trash and maybe help decorate a bulletin board. I felt so “chosen”, but not necessarily favorite. It was enough to be asked.
I once heard a priest describe it this way:
Imagine you have just died and been ushered through the Golden Gates to a marvelous banquet. Every delicacy you can imagine is there on a table laden with crystal and gold. Jesus comes up to you, welcomes you and with one arm around you shows you into the kitchen saying “My good friend, you have been working with me and for me all of your life. I couldn’t wait until you got here to help me serve all these other people who didn’t know or believe I existed”.
Those who don’t believe still do God’s work in so many ways and are blessed for it. They just don’t have the pleasure of knowing that they are working side by side in the kitchen with God.
Jane Haproff
June 23, 2022 – What God Do I Choose?
Yesterday I wrote about being chosen by God when I realized I also have a choice: I can choose my own image of God. Many worldly gods are available to me: money, career, family, culture, politics etc. Kierkegaard, one of my favorite philosophers, even referred to our moral commitments as a kind of God. But there are also many images of God within my Catholic beliefs. There is the God of devotion, who wants to be appeased, worshiped and adored. There is the transactional God; the “I will say three rosaries if you put that baby back to sleep” kind of God. There is the God who makes everything right, evening things out in some cosmic way. There is the God who makes rules and keeps records; the one Kierkegaard cautions us against. There can also be a tendency to make the institutional Church itself into God instead of the Body of Christ. And then there is St. John’s simple description of God: Love. These are only a few of the ways God is presented to us. And if I’m honest I have moved back and forth among them sometimes on the same day. I intentionally chose the God of love, but there are so many distractions, so much bad news that it is very hard to dwell in God’s love. Martin Buber, another favorite of mine, refers to the “eclipse of God”…that He is hidden behind a cloud of our own making.
God of love, clear the skies and our minds that we may dwell in your light and love .
Jane Haproff
June 24, 2022 – Church
There are many different ways to think about “church”. It can refer to a belief system, to a group of people, to a set of rituals and to a building. Right now I’m thinking of the building or place itself. One weekday morning I arrived for Mass early. The Church was nearly empty and dimly lit. The chalice and paten had already been placed on the altar. There was a quietness there that seemed to penetrate my being; a stillness that made me think of the hymn, “There Is a Presence in This Place.” I was able to experience quiet, with reminders all around me of sacredness: the Tabernacle, the lit candle beside it, the chalice and paten…all pointing me to the richness our faith and the presence of God. At Sunday Mass I again arrived a bit early and sat in the pew listening to the sounds of the Church filling with people: kneelers being lowered, Missalette pages rustling, but mostly the sound of greetings, people glad to see one another and to be together, some laughter, shaking hands and hugs. We were invited to formally greet those around us, and then join in the entrance song. Let the liturgy begin…there is a presence in this place.
Jane Haproff
June 25, 2022 – Wind Chimes
These last few days have been breezy, with slight winds blowing gently and then gusting and dying down off and on all day. We have two sets of wind chimes hanging on our front porch located parallel to each other and about eight feet apart. What has been interesting for me to notice is that they don’t both chime at the same time. It might be the case that one rings, and several minutes later the other one does, but they rarely chime together. First, on the same set of wind chimes different notes sound at different times and then different sets of wind chimes ring at different times and with different tones but they all make a “beautiful noise”. I’m sure someone can explain to me the subtle differences in air currents, but it made me think about us…the people of God as wind chimes. We are all hanging from the same string of beliefs and practices, yet our music rings out differently. We’re struck by the spirit differently and we make different music at different times, all trying to praise God, each in our own way and our own time.
Jane Haproff
June 26, 2022 - Sins vs Sin
Long ago in a theology class somewhere a priest remarked that we should be conscious that God took away the SIN of the world, the stain of sin… all of it. But we pray “sins of the world” as if there were a container of sins that God was concerned with. Ever since then I’ve prayed “Lamb of God, who takes away the sin of the world”. As I was thinking about this at Mass recently an important difference between the two became clear. I thought about what I personally mean when I say the “sin of the world” and I found myself thinking it was a bit impersonal. Sin is what is wrong with the world. It’s an abstract, universal, chronic condition that affects us all: sin, as if we can’t escape it especially in our neighbors. However when I said “sins of the world” I was aware of my own wrong doing. It became very personal…the stuff of “what I have done and what I have failed to do”. It’s not a chronic condition, it’s something I have a choice about. And though it is true that I continue to sin, it is also true that the stain is gone and I, with my sinfulness, have been redeemed.
Jane Haproff
Reflections for June 13-19, 2022
June 13, 2022—Re(creation)
One of my wife’s “bucket list” items was to see Niagara Falls. I had previously been there twice, but not for over 20 years. In early May, my wife and I, along with another couple, flew to Niagara Falls and spent a week on the Canadian side, staying in the small village of Niagara on the Lake, about 10 miles north of the Falls.
The highlight of our trip was seeing the Falls. A spectacular wonder, they touched all our senses from seeing their beauty to hearing their strong roar to experiencing the falls on the Maid of the Mist boat (it was like being baptized). We couldn’t help but ask, “How could anyone look at the Falls and not believe in God?”
Throughout our stay, we enjoyed beautiful weather and were welcomed everywhere we went. We learned that the Niagara, Canada area is situated in a beautiful wine country. Niagara on the Lake had a small downtown area with excellent restaurants and home to an annual theatre festival. Our hotel offered a beautiful view of the Niagara River and Lake Ontario, and the vicinity had beautiful walking trails surrounded by colorful tulips in full bloom. The area was very historical, playing a prominent role in the War of 1812. I marveled at how American and British citizens, once enemies at war, had become good friends.
Every now and then, a vacation can be magical. We seemed to be (re)created in the backyard of God’s own beautiful creation.
Bob Leathers
June 14, 2022—Liturgies—Part I
The word “liturgy” means “the work of the people.” As the new deacon and also as new parishioners, my wife, Cindy, and I have observed how much “work” by so many “people” goes into the celebration of our Sunday masses. (In the Eastern Catholic churches, Sunday masses are called “Divine Liturgies.”)
In my previous parishes, both before and after I was ordained a deacon, it seemed like one or just a few people did all the work. As a deacon, sometimes I needed to arrive early to open the sacristy, put out the vessels and other items needed for mass, turn on the sound system, and do any other “last minute” preparations. At SS. Peter & Paul, my experience has been so different. When I assist as a deacon, I really only need to show up and get vested. Everything is already done. Wow!
We are so blessed to have a wonderful Coordinator of RCIA and Liturgy, Coordinator of Music, and a group of committed volunteers to serve as Mass Coordinators, EM Coordinators, Ushers, Readers, EMs, Altar Servers, Greeters, musicians and singers, and AV and Live-stream projectionists. (Apologies for forgetting anyone.) At SS. Peter & Paul, our masses—our liturgies—are truly the work of the people. Eucharist means “thanksgiving,” and the Leathers family is grateful for such good liturgies at our new parish.
Bob Leathers
June 15, 2022—Liturgies—Part II
The Holy Week and Easter Sunday liturgies at SS. Peter & Paul gave me pause to reflect on these services, among the most solemn and holy of the year. This year the words that came to my mind were inspiring, uplifting and prayerful. Perhaps it was because we really couldn’t celebrate them in a suitable manner for the past three years due to the pandemic. But this year, these liturgies were special, the best I’ve ever attended both before and after being ordained a deacon.
Our Holy Week and Easter Sunday liturgies were truly the “work of the people” of our parish. Many hours were spent in planning, drafting the scripts, selecting and practicing the music, and conducting multiple rehearsals. The scripts included brief explanations, particularly for the three movements of the Triduum which spanned the time from the Mass of the Lord’s Supper on Holy Thursday to the celebration of Christ’s passion on Good Friday, to the Easter Vigil on Holy Saturday evening.
I was moved and blessed to be part of these wonderful celebrations and liturgies, and grateful for the work and contributions of our staff and volunteers.
Bob Leathers
June 16, 2022—Does Persistence Pay Off?
A few years ago in middle school (smile!), my favorite subject was math. I was taking both second year algebra and geometry courses. I had a string of A’s going but found myself on the cusp of receiving a B for the first time. I really liked my math teacher, so it happened that as the grading period was ending, we both happened to be at the local grocery store. I followed him around while he was shopping, pleading my case for an A. I guess this is no different than a child following their mother around a toy store, wearing her out while her child explains over and over again in painstaking detail why he or she needs this or that toy. And if you didn’t get what you wanted, it’s easy to conclude that your parent or teacher was not fair.
This story has been a reminder to be persistent in our pursuits, and especially so in the face of injustice. Over time, I’ve learned that the pursuit of justice is not a one-person show; we need the help of companions and the action of our community. It challenges us to ask: Do we stand by while others pursue justice, or do we also get involved?
By the way, I did get the A in my math class and over the years, my teacher taught me a lot more than math. When Cindy and I got married, my math teacher was the best man at our wedding!
Bob Leathers
June 17, 2022—Community
When Cindy and I moved to Roseville in mid-2020, we not only missed the Bay Area locale, but also the communities of which we were a part. These included our parish, diaconate and our respective work communities. Initially, the pandemic didn’t make it easy to become part of new communities in the Roseville area.
Once we moved into our home in Roseville, things started to fall in place. We became part of a neighborhood group consisting of 20 or so families. One neighbor hosts a men’s coffee every week, and most of us take turns bringing breakfast goodies. Cindy and the other women get together monthly for a bunko night. Another community has been SS. Peter & Paul. We have been so graciously welcomed. I’ve been invited to our parish’s Cursillo men’s reunions, and both Cindy and I are blessed to be part of the Sacramento diaconate community, too.
We still miss the communities we had in the Bay Area. Cindy still hosts our former parish’s Women’s Book Club every two months on Zoom! But we are overjoyed at becoming a part of our new communities. In addition to the social activities, members support each other. When a neighbor recently had surgery, neighbors took turns making dinner each night for a week. And we’ve also helped each other with rides to the airport.
Our communities bring us life and we are very grateful. As the Lord speaks to us in Genesis, we are not meant to be alone.
Bob Leathers
June 18, 2022—Life’s Curve Balls
A few years before my father passed away, my mother was diagnosed with dementia. Eventually she needed a walker in the house and a wheelchair if she went out. Dementia and Alzheimer’s are diseases that eat away at memory and the body’s motor skills. It’s not easy to watch a parent or someone you love suffer from such diseases. It’s also not easy to care for them when you are an only child.
Friends and family encouraged me. They said, “Have faith. Don’t be afraid of your cross. In caring for your parents, you are caring for Christ.” (Jesuit Father James Martin once quoted a nun whose illness confined her to a wheelchair for many years. When the Mother Superior encouraged her to imitate Jesus in carrying her cross, the nun quipped, “Jesus only had to carry his cross for a few hours.”)
Fortunately, I had supportive friends and family. I was able to hire a caretaker to spend weekdays with my parents. Occasionally, she stayed overnight so I could get away. After my father passed away, I had a friend who took me on a trip to Boston (my favorite city) to get away for a weekend.
Looking back, I could see that my friends were correct. In caring for my parents, I was caring for Christ. But I could only see that after they had died. The paradox of our faith is that the cross is the path to life, the sign of God’s enormous, incomprehensible love for us.
Bob Leathers
June 19, 2022—This Is Us
Yesterday, I reflected on my mother’s dementia. Today, I’m reflecting on a TV family’s struggle with dementia, poignantly conveyed in the NBC series, This Is Us. NBC recently aired the series’ final episode. Much of the final season dealt with Rebecca Pearson’s (played by Mandy Moore) dementia, and the difficult decisions her three children, Kevin, Randall and Kate, faced as Rebecca’s dementia worsened.
Each sibling had a different idea of where their mom should spend her last days. When the siblings met at the family home in Pittsburgh, they argued about the best approach. Kevin and Randall wanted to move Rebecca to their homes in Los Angeles and Philadelphia, respectively, but the two brothers wouldn’t listen to each other and pushed back on Kate’s approach, while acknowledging their mom appointed Kate to be Rebecca’s guardian. But Kate had observed that her brothers never looked into their mom’s eyes when they spoke with her and never touched her. If they couldn’t look at or touch her, why would anything change if Rebecca moved in with one of them? Challenged by Kate, Kevin offered to move his family from Los Angeles to Pittsburgh and live in Rebecca’s home. This solved the dilemma.
Rebecca’s dementia brought her three children together. This moving and poignant episode made me reflect on how much we need to support each other in the face of a crippling illness and how the power of love can restore hope when everything seems hopeless.
Bob Leathers
Reflections for June 6-12, 2022
June 6, 2022 - Motherhood and Mary as Our Model
Being a mother is my greatest achievement and one that brings joy and pain sometimes all at once. Raising teenagers is not easy, let alone three of them at once. When the kids were 4, 3, and 1, life was busy, chaotic but full. As the kids turn 18, 17, 14, and 10 (bonus baby) I am aware again of how chaotic, busy, and full our lives are. We are richly blessed with health, stable income, and activities abounding, but on occasion my teen(s) and I may struggle to agree on expectations or deliverables. It’s then that I ponder how Mary would handle this situation. How would she handle a miscommunication or dispute with Jesus? She was steady, grounded in God’s truth and love even when she saw her Son die on the cross.. Her love for God and her Son did not diminish despite the pain. She did not have an ego of “my Son” or allow her feelings to cloud submitting to God’s will.
When I get to the heart of the issue in a dispute and am over my hurt feelings about our miscommunication, I go back to “speak truth with love.” I am reminded by Mary’s example that truth has no ego; truth has no feelings; truth is inherently what God calls us to seek – seek him in all ways through truth and love.
Bianca Hennager
June 7 2022 - Miracles in Our Midst
Fourteen years ago our family with three small children moved up to the Sacramento area when my husband accepted a teaching position up here. My husband took a slight pay cut to move here as we wanted to be near family and fell in love with the area when we visited. Working out the details of the pay cut didn’t seem insurmountable, but the cost of benefits nearly broke us. It was 2008 and most school districts stopped paying 100% benefits to new hires. My husband was tenured at his previous school so we had 100% of our benefits paid. Having to pay for benefits for a whole family was eye opening. I remember pinching more pennies than I would have liked just to keep the lights on. One small miracle that came around this time was undelivered mail. My aunt had sent us card on the birth of our daughter in August, but we never received it. I thought it was lost in the mail. Finances grew exceptionally tight especially as the Holidays approached, when a pleasant surprise showed up in our mail. It was my Aunt’s card stamped “insufficient postage” requires $0.25 additional postage. Someone paid the postage for us and in the card there was a very generous gift card which helped us finance our kids’ Christmas! I know if we had received the card when it was originally intended it would not have been spent on gifts for the holidays. The timing of this generous gift was truly miraculous and something I will never forget.
Bianca Hennager
June 8, 2022 - Courage under Change
The end of the school year has come, and with it a lot of change, and not only on the home front. My oldest leaves for college, another daughter enters high school, and I was recently asked to lead a department that is struggling with changes within the business. I was excited at the opportunity to lead a new team. But shortly into the role, I realized it would be a heavy undertaking to help eight leaders adjust to the necessary fast- paced rate of change. Several on the team were also struggling with personal stressors outside of work which compounded their resistance to change in the workforce. I worked individually with each leader to identify specific obstacles and I committed to resolve each of them. I was mentally and physically exhausted by this. Typically, I would spend 12 hours a day trying to meet the needs of each of my team members. As the leader of leaders, I felt alone in my vision of what I saw each leader capable of. My boss was encouraging when I became weary and worn down. It takes a lot of courage to lead others in the ways that are needed to make change. Some days I questioned if it was worth all the sacrifice and time spent on lifting others up.
We are still amid change and transformation but some of the team leaders are helping to lift others up on the team. I am continually surprised by how God uses each of us to help carry out his Divine Plan whether we recognize it in the moment or not.
Bianca Hennager
June 9, 2022 - Open the Eyes of My Heart Lord
“Open the eyes of my heart, Lord. I want to see you.” Seeing the Lord with our heart helps us to open our eyes. When things seem impossible and unlikely God can move mountains. Right after graduating college and coming home I began a Young Adult Ministry at my local Church. I remember speaking after one of the Masses about the need for volunteers for an upcoming eveny we were hosting when I saw a young gentleman standing towards the back of the Church. I personally invited him to the event and asked for his commitment. He was taken aback by my direct nature but hesitantly agreed. Upon arriving at the event, I thanked him for coming and put him to work. He had so much fun serving and helping that the next time he didn’t need an invitation. I saw how he became more involved in our Ministry and in Church in general. About 5 years later, he was serving at the Archdiocesan level as an advisory member and still very involved in our local Church. I asked him one day what made him decide to become so involved. He commented that it was from being personally called to serve. The experience which was happen stance on my part of seeing someone and personally inviting him to serve was life changing for him. I do not take the credit for his experience as I felt it was the Holy Spirit moving through me to help open his eyes to what the Lord was calling him to do. Being able to witness years later how he continued to minister to others was such a blessing.
Bianca Hennager
June 10, 2022 - End of School Year Drain
The end of the school year is filled with lots of events and a race to the finish line. As we draw closer to the finish line, I am drained. Each morning is a challenge to get the kiddos out the door to school on time; breakfast is skipped or rushed and eaten on the run; and dinner is mostly out unless there is a fast option at home. In these moments it is hard to see God at work in my life. Everything seems like a grind with little joy. And then I am reminded of the freedom of summer days: sleeping in, long days at the pool; sun burns that turn into suntans; simple dinners; and popsicles. That helps propel me to get through the end of the year. And all the while God is inviting me to spend more time with him in this busy time. I am reminded of a saying, “Every one of us needs half an hour of prayer daily, except when we are busy – then we need an hour.” It is in my busy moments that I need to stop and focus on what truly matters – spending time with Jesus in prayer. I make the time when I’m in the car or in little breaks throughout the day. I am looking forward to a little retreat this summer where I can spend time in prayer with our Lord and be surrounded by other faith filled women to help me grow in my faith. I hope to be energized by this experience and to be able to give back to others who may need the same thing.
Bianca Hennager
June 11, 2022 - What Is “Good”?
When I use the word “good” it seems like such a bland descriptive term yet so hard to embody. I remember when I taught upper elementary we would have words that we would “ban” the use of in writing since they are often over used. Good was one of those words. Nice was another word added to the list. As a class we came up with other more descriptive words to help depict what the author was trying to convey. When I think. “what does it mean to be ‘good’” so many things come to mind. A good upright person of faith is someone who seeks the Lord, prays, holds their tongue, listens with an open heart, and is a witness to what the Gospel preaches. The saints had all of these traits and more. As a follower of Christ I work to embody these qualities – some days it’s harder than others. As a parent, I try to instill the importance of these qualities in my children. As a spouse I try to witness to these qualities to help my spouse. Often I question how a person who is on the journey of faith can speak of what is good when they are still learning it. It comes down to not only being able to speak about what is good but striving to live a life that is good. I fall short many days and I work to make amends for my many shortcomings. I pray that my family can see my efforts and know that I am full of good intentions.
Bianca Hennager
June 12, 2022 - Holy Trinity Sunday
God the Father is easy to relate to as I have a father. God the Son is easy to relate to as I have a son. God the Holy Spirit – who is that exactly? As I recall the beautiful mystery of the Holy Trinity it is something that confounds me and is something I work to relate to. It is easy to speak of the “Spirit” as somethone that moves throughout my life, bringing gifts and fruits. But I find it easier to focus on the tangibles or things that make sense. The gifts of the Holy Spirit and fruits of the Holy Spirit are two things that help to guide me in knowing God the Holy Spirit better. I wonder if there is more that I am missing? I know that this is one of our greatest mysteries of faith. I know that God will make known all the questions that I have stored away in my mind when the time comes. For now, I accept it as a mystery and not something that I fully understand.
Believing in something that I don’t fully understand reminds me of the saying “the blind will see”. I may be blind to knowing, but one day I will see. One day it will all make sense, and it is okay that it doesn’t all make sense now. As a questioner and worrier this can be hard for me at times. It is during those moments that I call upon Our Father to help guide me and to help me be at peace with not knowing. As we celebrate Holy Trinity Sunday may we revel in this mystery of faith knowing God is amazing and can do all.
Bianca Hennager
Reflections for May 30-June 5, 2022
May 30, 2022 - Physical Meets Spiritual
A wise cross-country coach taught me how to improve my running times and distance. He suggested that I aim for a landmark and tag it when I reach it. I would choose a rock, tree or road sign to mark a turnaround point or distance achieved. The importance of this practice was to physically touch the landmark when I arrived. I still use this technique. I have a stop sign at the top of a challenging hill that I hit with great satisfaction when I reach the top, out of breath and spent. When I feel like quitting, I look ahead to a tree that I want to reach and when I do I rub my hand along the bark of the trunk to prove to myself that I made it.
I related this concept recently when discussing the sacraments at a retreat that I attended. We were discussing how physically receiving God’s blessing makes our connection with him more tangible. I’m able to hold the body of Christ in my hands during my weekly celebration of the Eucharist. My children were able to feel and smell the oil used in confirmation on their foreheads. I’m reminded of the marriage sacrament when I twist the wedding ring around my finger. I watched my infants get emerged in the holy water of baptism.
The physical can bring the spiritual. The goal may not be a faster 5K but a closeness to Christ. What can we be physically and tangibly doing to achieve this?
Jen Payan
May 31, 2022 - Family Vacations
Being the CEO of family operations, I’m often overwhelmed when planning family vacations. The amount of organizing, planning, and preparation is daunting. I carefully select our accommodations for comfort and activities that will keep everyone busy and engaged. I want everyone to be happy and satisfied. I spend much time planning and worrying that everything will be up to my family’s expectations.
After reflecting on the stress associated with vacation planning, I decided to do a quick text survey inquiring from each member what their most memorable moments on vacations over the years have been. What was interesting is that not one of them mentioned the quality of the accommodations, activities, or meals. But they all mentioned times that we all laughed together. The most popular response recalled an incident in which we all laughed until we cried. It involved a swan, a patio of quiet diners, and a flatulent member of our family trying to blame it on the swan- if you must know. They also mentioned witnessing nature - seeing baby monkeys in a tree, discovering sand dollars, and making it to the top of a ridge overlooking the ocean.
This is a great reminder of God’s intentions for our family time together. He wants us to laugh and find joy. He wants us to enjoy his creation. He probably isn’t terribly concerned about the logistics. He gave us our families to be in communion with him and each other. The take home: enjoy the moments, drop the pressure of perfection.
Jen Payan
June 1, 2022 - The Peter in All of Us
This Lenten season, I was reminded of my love for the apostle Peter. He loves Jesus with such great intensity and is always striving to be close with him and do what Jesus asks. However, he often falls short.
After pledging his love to Jesus during the Last Supper, he claims himself a devoted disciple but then asks Jesus who is the greatest among his apostles, trying to get the “you are my favorite” wink from Jesus. Jesus immediately calls him out on his pride. Then after pledging his complete faithfulness to Jesus, Peter folds under pressure and denies that he even knows him.
My favorite Peter story is when Jesus comes to the disciples’ rescue during a storm by walking across the water to reach their boat. Peter impulsively leaps from the boat to meet Jesus, believing he will surely be able to walk toward his teacher. Unfortunately, as soon as his feet hit the water he becomes afraid and starts to sink. He cries out “Lord save me!” Jesus reaches out, catches him, and asks “why did you doubt?” He says “you of little faith” to Peter. While Peter’s heart so confident in Jesus’ love he still had that moment of fear and insecurity.
Don’t I often act as Peter did? I love and trust in God, but as soon as fear, doubt or grief set in I begin to waiver. But I think scripture makes it clear, especially when telling the story of Peter’s relationship with Jesus, that I am always going to be forgiven, loved, encouraged, and corrected by God.
Jen Payan
June 2, 2022 - Fire
My husband recently retired after 30 years in the fire service. People often ask him what fighting fire was like. Most have the Hollywood perspective: charging into a burning room with water and axes, looking for victims who they triumphantly save.
Real firefighters tell a different story. Entering a burning building is a blind experience. The room is dark with smoke. Walls guide them in a crawl, searching the rooms, feeling for victims who have often succumbed to smoke, not knowing if they are alive or not. Rescuers are laden with heavy equipment and air tanks and constantly fight disorientation. They just work diligently to find their way back to the point of entry to deliver victims to medics standing by.
Recently, fire departments have started using thermal imaging cameras. While they are still trained to work in the blind, these cameras have given them the gift of vision and light. They use the camera to scan the room intermittently during a search, improving their orientation and ability to spot a victim and get them both safely to the exit.
I feel that is what letting God into your life can do. I know that he provides the light and security I need, but often I ignore it and grope around in the dark. The stress and pressure can be enormous when I act without his help. He has given all of us access to the gift of his light. I just need to remember to keep it in my tool bag! Are you ready to start using your God imagining camera?
Jen Payan
June 3, 2022 - Tattoos
I’ve seen many tattoos in my 30 years as a nurse and EMT, from the humorous to the artistic to the offensive. And, the tattoo might give me a little insight into who this person is.
I recall caring for a trauma victim in the ICU that was in a coma on a ventilator with some very disturbing tattoos displaying racism and hate. Large swastikas covered the back of his head and chest. Staff immediately took offense. We did our best to provide compassionate care, but it wasn’t easy.
After this patient recovered and was discharged, a physician friend of mine shared a story with. At this man’s follow up visit to his office, the man asked “do my tattoos offend you?” My friend answered truthfully, “yes, they do. I’m Jewish and it is very hard to see the swastikas on your skin.” To my friend’s surprise, the man apologized, saying he had gotten the tattoos during a difficult time in his life and they no longer reflected his values. He now had to live with them. My friend accepted the apology and was moved by the man’s story.
What an amazing lesson! I had been seething in anger and hurt since my first contact with this man. The tattoos had defined him. I had not taken the time to hear his story because I had already judged him. I know situations like these are gifts from God that help change my heart and mind. He is constantly teaching me ways to be more Christian.
Jen Payan
June 4, 2022 - By Myself!
One of my daughters was so terribly independent as a child that I think her first words were “by myself!” She insisted on picking her own outfits, dressing herself, and putting on shoes without assistance. She would refuse a hand when climbing a tree or balancing on a narrow beam. Of course, this led to accidents – a broken arm falling off a short retaining wall, a black eye from swinging a golf club, to name a few. Never mind the crimes against fashion.
I know many parents reading this are relating right now. You know, the one kid that gave you a heart attack at the park when they tried standing on top of the swing set? Or that you lost track of at the store and found them wandering the isles on their own? What about the one who would only push their own stroller and never sit in it? As a parent, these experiences are both terrifying and infuriating at the same time. So much patience and calmness are required to parent our independent little ones. Yet, we still want them to have adventures, make their own decisions, and be daring. We just long for their safety and wellbeing.
I imagine that is how our God the Father feels about caring for us. He has given us all free will and an amazing creation to live in. And, He wants me to experience it, but not necessarily “by myself.” He wants to protect and care for me. He wants to help me thrive. I need to remember to reach up and grab his hand when he offers it. Asking for help from him just makes me stronger and keeps me safe.
Jen Payan
June 5, 2022 - Not Enough
Recently, while studying the book of Exodus with my bible study group, I was part of many discussions about the complex character of Moses. Many of us were astounded by his transformation from an insecure young man to one of the strongest leaders of the Israelites. What we found most relatable was his initial doubt in his abilities when he was called by God. Even after getting a personal invitation (via burning bush) from God to lead his people he still didn’t have the confidence to take the position. Many times he voiced his insecurities to God. “I’m not a good speaker” and “nobody is going to listen to me.” But God himself was telling Moses that he was capable.
How many times have I felt I was “not enough?” Or have I felt that I didn’t have what it takes to get through a challenging situation? Through the story of Moses, God is assuring me that He will always provide us with the skills and talents to help us. Especially if we are receiving a call from him.
Jen Payan
Reflections for May 23-29, 2022
May 23, 2022 – Busy
Earlier this year I found myself busy being involved in many different activities and there was still more that I wanted to do. Some of the things I wanted to do conflicted with other commitments I had already made, and I couldn’t do it all. It was a stressful time being as busy as I was, while also being a sad time since I couldn’t do it all. Reflecting on this, I realized that it’s important to accept that sometimes you can’t do everything you want to, whether it’s because of time conflicts or the inability to handle everything, and that is ok. As for dealing with the stresses of having a lot to do in a short time, I need to remind myself that I can only do one thing at a time. Oftentimes, if I look at my calendar and see a lot of meetings, events, rehearsals, etc., I tend to stress out about not having enough time to just relax. Sometimes I have things on my calendar that are supposed to be fun and should be things I look forward to, but instead of looking forward to it, I stress about the planning I need to do or the other responsibilities I have before or after those days. I need to take things one day at a time and enjoy every moment as they come. After all, even God didn’t create the universe all in one day!
Heidi Schuyler
May 24, 2022 – Masks
This past year I volunteered to lead a Youth and Family Faith class. This is not my first year volunteering, but this time was different from the past. Because of COVID-19, everyone had to wear a mask during class time. I had no complaints about this because I believe everyone’s safety is very important. However, I found that the masks made it difficult to connect to the students. I had a hard time figuring out if they were following me as I talked, if they were bored, or if they were getting something out of the class. I didn’t know if I was doing a decent job engaging them in discussion. Many of the students in my group rarely participated in discussion and I didn’t know if they were just shy or if they didn’t care. One day, after I made some take-away points on a discussion question, I decided to ask if what I said made sense to them and if they agreed or disagreed because everyone kept quiet. Some of the students nodded in agreement, and one let me know that they’re all just taking it in and processing it in their own way. That was good to know and helped me feel better. The challenges that I had with my class reinforce the idea that facial cues are very important for human connection and I pray for a day when COVID-19 can completely be seen in the rearview mirror.
Heidi Schuyler
May 25, 2022 – Energy
My parents have told me stories of adventures they took before I was born. Once they spontaneously took a road trip from Sacramento to Utah without even stopping. They told me that they had so much energy when they were younger but now could no longer take such a trip at their age. Being about the same age that they were at that time, I reflected on how I don’t feel like the energy I have now matches what they used to have. I am always tired and I don’t want to do anything most of the time. I often must force myself to get out of the house and exercise. I wondered why I and many of my peers lack the energy that our parents’ generation seemed to have at our age, and I think it has to do with the fast-paced world we’re living in now. In the past, when we didn’t have computers and all the other technology we have today, completing various tasks for work or school took longer and expectations of the time it should take were lower. Now we live in a fast-paced world where everything is at our fingertips, and more is expected of us. The stress from all of this can be overwhelming and make us more tired. I think a good solution to this problem is finding time to relax and destress at the end of every week – even God needed to take time for rest after creating the universe!
Heidi Schuyler
May 26, 2022 – Prayer
There are so many ways for us to pray; my favorite is just simply talking to God. In prayer, I like to thank Him for the many blessings He has given me, give Him praise, and express to Him my fears and frustrations. I also often ask for guidance in certain situations when I don’t know what to do. When I ask for clarity, I hope to hear an answer from Him but I usually don’t get it. I started to think that maybe I don’t get answers sometimes because I’m not opening my ears and heart. Sometimes I’m afraid of the answer I think I will get because that answer might be that what I want is not good for me or I might be told I’m called to do something that I don’t want to do. Because of this, I think I often don’t spend extra time in silence waiting for an answer from God when I pray. In prayer, I ask the Lord for answers to my questions and problems but then I have trouble opening myself up to accept them. So I pray: Open my ears, Lord. Help me to hear your voice.
Heidi Schuyler
May 27, 2022 – Rejection
Rejection is a reality that we all face in life. It is something that I experienced recently. It always stings and is disappointing, but I must remember Matthew 21:42: “The stone that the builders rejected has become the cornerstone.” Although Jesus was rejected by the Jewish people and crucified, He became the cornerstone of our Church and faith. A lot of good can come out of rejection. In some cases, a rejection can push me to look at ways I can improve myself and maybe be successful next time. In other cases, nothing may need to be improved and a rejection could just mean that a better opportunity that I don’t know about yet will present itself later. When one door closes, another one opens. I have to trust that when things don’t work out the way I want, it is either because I can learn from it, or God has a better plan for me.
Heidi Schuyler
May 28, 2022 – Light Up the Darkness
I have been hearing more and more news about mass shootings and other violent crimes lately, including the recent news of a racially motivated mass shooting at a supermarket in Buffalo, NY. When I think about the lives lost, I am filled with both anger and sadness for the hate and evil in the world. I want these horrible acts to be put to an end, but I don’t know how I can personally stop them. When you are only one person, it can seem like nothing you do will be enough to make a change, but this is not true. Just as the Easter candle is lit from the fire at the Easter Vigil each year and the flame is passed on from person to person until all candles are lit, so can our own lights be passed on from person to person until the whole world is lit up and darkness is conquered. We may have a long way to go until this is achieved, but it all starts with a single candle. I can start by being sure to show kindness and love to others whenever I see someone in need, in both big and small ways.
Heidi Schuyler
May 29, 2022 – Return
In today’s first reading (Acts 1:1-11), Jesus ascended into heaven and two men dressed in white garments appeared and said, “Men of Galilee, why are you standing there looking at the sky? This Jesus who has been taken up from you into heaven will return in the same way as you have seen him going into heaven.” In reading this, I imagined Jesus returning to Earth the same way he left to go to heaven. What a magnificent sight that would be for anyone who witnesses it some day! I don’t know when Jesus’s second coming will be and it most probably will not be in my lifetime. But if it were to occur during my lifetime, I would feel so honored if I had the chance to witness His descent onto Earth. I’m sure I would be filled with much awe and wonder. Though I don’t know when Jesus will return, while we wait, I pray that I may prepare myself by loving all people, making a difference in the lives of others, and following Jesus wherever He leads me throughout my life.
Heidi Schuyler